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Something to ponder
(Preview)
"Don't miss this. Don't miss your life. There's infinitely more than the experience of love we already know. Push against your borders. Dare to move through the next threshold to the freedom awaiting you." (Paula D'Arcy)
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grateful2be
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10
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389
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That whole saying if nothing changes ..
(Preview)
I love that saying if nothing changes .. well .. nothing changes .. in seeing the STBAX on Sunday night as weird and intense as that reaction was it really goes to show me how much things in my little world have changed .. my world is not so little. Those who are struggling through their own situations and...
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Pushka
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4
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416
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Understanding that abuse cycle.
(Preview)
Just been reading recent posts about the abuse cycle. I reckon, we can't post about that nasty old abuse cycle often enough, when someone mentions living with abuse. I didn't understand it for years, I just got sucked in again and again. But the more you understand it, the more obvious it all becomes an...
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Melly1248
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36
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734
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Permission
(Preview)
Alanon has helped me alot, combined with all the self-help books I have read, first hand experience and I think age too I have come to a few conclusions....no matter what I have "choices". Looking back on my marriage and consequently my divorce, I concluded that it was HIS fault that he made...
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oldergal
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4
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310
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I was going to let him move back home
(Preview)
My 19 year old son came around a few weeks ago...he sounded great! He was his old self, not using (no program) and it gave me hope! Then he got with some old friends slid there we go. He really wants to stop....but he's just not ready yet. He wants to go back to school and go into the navy, but this weekend I f...
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Katytexasmom
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13
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613
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great book
(Preview)
Yesterday on Dr. Oz he had Steven Tyler for a guest. They talked about addiction and recovery. He brought on his doctor from the Betty Ford Center. The doctor has a great book and Steven Tyler wrote the foreword. I ordered it for my Kindle for under $9. I stopped the book I was reading and started it. WO...
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afglin
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1
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197
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Name change
(Preview)
I hope this is okay to post here. I am wanting to change my name. Do I have to create a new account or can I somehow change it?
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hisimage
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2
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243
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Awareness about love
(Preview)
I had a huge relization yesterday about why I alllow alcoholics and their abusive behaviors into my life. As some of you know I had just left my extremely abusive alcoholic BF that is no in jail for abusing me. I allow abuse as I abuse myself-mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually. I can na...
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joker
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3
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269
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This whole schooling thing just got very real! It'a all in my head!
(Preview)
After working my hinder off to get into this RN program and doing my general eds, prerequisettes and sciences up the ying this last year I was finally accepted into the ADN program. I have been on top of the world! Day one was yesterday and if I thought I had worked hard up to now, I am about to prove to myself...
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Breakingfree
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11
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380
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Back and forth - between fear and acceptance
(Preview)
Throughout the day, I find myself going back & forth between worry and fear for my son to calm and acceptance. Am I making any progress??
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Rose50
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3
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277
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From Changing my number to making 'friends'
(Preview)
So after nasty words and arguing for weeks, my alcoholic mum textd me saying she wanted to make friends before i leave so i said i do too, and invited her round for lunch, today she came round & told me how her house was going up for sale on Monday, she's been saying for years she's going to sell the house...
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qwerty49
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2
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345
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Posting So I Don't Text
(Preview)
The pseudo-ex and I texted this morning. I needed his legal advice on something that was bothering me and asked. I told him that I didn't want to talk about anything personal - I just needed his legal opinion on a matter. Since he is the master of self control he was - cool, calm and collected (as much as you...
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RunnerChick
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11
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505
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The courage to change...
(Preview)
a thing that I can. I've not done a certain 9th step for a long time because of the caveat "except when to do so would injure them or others" and so up till now I've poke and stabbed at it to see if I can rid myself of the self resentment for what I did a long while ago...before recovery came along...
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Jerry F
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10
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428
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it is always darkest before the dawn...
(Preview)
Going back in time: On August 10th 1 am I let my mom go. I was up before dawn & there were some dark moments & still are. I am just grateful that time has gone by & I am experiencing the dawn in a different way. I feel very poetic these days & tend to share songs & titles that mean very much t...
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Hoot Nanny
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2
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314
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My thoughts, Hope Changes Everything!
(Preview)
There is no change without Action. You can say "This is it Life". Time for me to change this Life. I know I can do it. And then set yourself a plan. There is nothing you cant do if you have HOPE and put this hope into action.
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Bettina
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7
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299
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This one hit home ODAT September 6th
(Preview)
Today's Reminder " I sit on a man's back, choking him and making him carry me, and yet assure myself and others that I am very sorry for him and wish to ease his lot by all possible means -- except by getting off his back." " Teach me to leave to others their inborn right to dignity and indep...
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Cathyinaz
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3
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248
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Forcing Solutions
(Preview)
Just for today I will not force a solution. Based on my recent split, I realized the verbose email I penned to my ex was an attempt to control the situation. If I pan back and look at the times we have reconciled, with the exception of ONE, I have always been the one who has tried to write something eloquent,...
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RunnerChick
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6
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597
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Today's Reminder
(Preview)
Step One must be learned and repeated until it becomes part of me. Whenever I give in to my natural impulse and habit to take over and to try and force a change, I'm in trouble again. I know I can only make progress when I really believe in and practice the First Step: 1. We admitted we were powerless over a...
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Bettina
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5
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232
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Fourth step work
(Preview)
I finally worked out a minor resentment I've been having lately and it gave me the courage to speak up today after taking the time to write things down. I really surprised myself when of all people who ended upon my resentment list, it was my boss. I was sitting down this weekend trying to pull up a new name...
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Aloha
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7
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409
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How Do I Say No?
(Preview)
Hello all: It has been a while since I have been on here. A couple of years actually. I'm still fighting the good fight. My ABF has been using for too long. Finally I gave him the ultimatum back in the beginning of July, and told him it's rehab or your out. So after 4weeks of him "deciding" he fin...
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faith84
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12
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593
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My Ex AH is making me mental!
(Preview)
I generally stay disengaged. Do not communicate for the most part and with the order for supervised visitation he has done nothing for months...and then...it starts again. He goes for 3-4 months of quiet and leaving me alone and not harassing our child and then back at it. I tell myself - you can't...
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abbyalana
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2
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327
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Just sharing a piece of the MIP story and me speaking at a AA convention.
(Preview)
It was through my journey in recovery, starting in the rooms of Alcoholics Anonymous, that I gratefully found my way through the doors of Al-Anon some years later. This video shares the beginning of my becoming a "Miracle In Progress" and what it took for me to finally surrender to the recovery proce...
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John
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7
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357
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heroin addiction
(Preview)
good afternoon all I've been with my bf for 2 and a half years now and for a year and a half of it, he's been addicted to heroin. he has struggled with this addiction most of his life. I've been going to an al-anon meeting every once in awhile and it certainly does help...even after reading a bit of literatu...
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nycwolf
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6
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3383
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im growing impatient in his recovery
(Preview)
My boyfriend has been sober for 5 months now and is really improving thos time. He doin good. He goin to a group session and one on one once a week. He seeing his doctor regularly and being treated for his depression. He doing all he can and is really trying. My problem is i expecting too much from him and get...
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lorraine
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14
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524
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They're All In The Throes of Insanity....
(Preview)
Don't take what the alcoholics, addicts do personally, three quarters of the time they don't know what they are doing or why they are doing it and if its wrong most of the time they don't care or don't want to care and the cycle goes on. They don't mean to be ugly, they are probably really nice people. But ri...
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oldergal
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10
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494
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No word from my son
(Preview)
I have not heard from my son since last Friday. He was supposed to have picked up his cellphone at my place on Saturday and never showed up. I went to a meeting earlier today and that helped to ease my fear and anxiety. Nothing I can do but wait for any news. I am so tired of feeling sad.
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Rose50
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9
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442
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I Kind of had to put a end to it
(Preview)
Good Morning I truly thought I could have a relationship with my son but I'm realizing it's not easy if he's still drinking. I went early this morning and left his things ( paperwork ) he needed to his old place and left it on the porch. I didn't want to see him. He has been calling now that he has a charger...
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Cathyinaz
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10
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451
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Grateful today but...
(Preview)
Its been hard letting go of my alcoholic bf that had been abusive-in all ways toward me.Hhe is now in jail for physically abusing me. He has plead not guilty to the charge and trial is set for Dec 16-18/13. I had been praying for him and asking for god's will to be done in his life. I am enjoying the sin...
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joker
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6
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224
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I'm sorry I dont remember
(Preview)
I am very new to Al anon. I have yet to attend a meeting. My sister in law has attended a few and has been a blessing through this all. I am struggling with how far to let this go before I decide its necessary to leave. I have 3 beautiful daughters, 11,6, and 1. The older two are from a previous relationship. I s...
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Mari1978
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9
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396
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argument, discussion or standing up for myself?
(Preview)
Obviously there is a difference between arguing discussing & just stating a fact! I am tired of my AH not letting it go. He thinks that every time we discuss something or I stand up for myself we are arguing. I am so tired of this. His first wife seemed to have argued w/ him a lot because he freaks out whe...
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Hoot Nanny
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3
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284
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Feeling anxious this morning
(Preview)
Hello all, I am teaching a class this morning in my home that I haven't taught in several years and am so anxious. On top of this, my daughter is starting a new job this morning and she is anxious, and my cat is following me around anxiously meowing, wanting me to feed her more. I am applying my steps and sl...
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PP
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17
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496
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the DANGERS of rescuing and enabling the Alkies and Narkies
(Preview)
CAlled A brother..... Court went "ok" as "Ok" as it could have gone....He does not have his license back yet, he will have to go to the registry and plea with them, hardship case, etc (re: his work) and they are going to send him to drinking and driving school for free...so even th...
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neshema2
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6
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402
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AH will never be emtional support... accepted !
(Preview)
My enableing inlaws and husbands AAunt put my son in the middle of adult business by talking about my choice to not him stay with Aaunt anymore when I found out what an A she was, in front of him at the lake a couple months ago. After the verbal abuse I heard from her on my phone recording after I removed my so...
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sweeetr
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3
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213
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MONDAY MEETING 9AM (EST) IN PROGRESS – TOPICS: CONTROL, FEAR, ANXIETY, LET GO & LET GOD
(Preview)
Meeting scheduled in the Al-anon chat room at 9:00AM Eastern Standard Time Topics are: Control, managing fear, anxiety and Letting Go and Letting God The website link to the group meeting room is http://www.12stepforums.net/chatroom2.html. There are other ways to join the room also. U...
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Desirae
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0
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221
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What happens after I say NO
(Preview)
My son called. His cell phone is off. i told him that he cannot move in and go to school as we had planned because while I was lining up tutors and gettithat he school packets he was partying like a rock star! I told him I'm doing all the work and that's not going to work. I told him I saw all ths on Facebook and t...
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Katytexasmom
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6
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368
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And after all that...
(Preview)
And after all that, feeling all upset and confused, I turned off my computer and decided to spend the weekend technology free, just hanging with my daughter and thinking happy thoughts. So we snuggled up on the couch to watch a tv show and suddenly, there is this terrific wailing and screaming coming i...
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Melly1248
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9
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296
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Disturbing reaction ..
(Preview)
This town is way to small .. ugh. The kids and I have been going to starbucks to use the internet and honestly I have been waiting for this to happen. Sure enough tonight is the night he almost walked in .. that really threw me. I don't like the emotional reaction I had to him .. it's not even the emotional...
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Pushka
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9
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498
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Replied to my ex alcoholic partner in prison....
(Preview)
My ex partner & i broke up just before new year just gone as his behavior was at it's lowest point. Since then he left me 30+ letters in my letter box & wouldn't leave me alone. He sat outside my flat one day in the garden for 3 hours & a neighbor rang the police. After that i had to report him for ha...
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qwerty49
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10
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322
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just writing
(Preview)
I have been on here for some time now and I have read most of the stuff that ppl write about her ah and abf and so forth. I cant say that about my ex because I do not know if he is or not and I never seen the behavior ppl are talking about on here nor has he ever been drunk around me. I mean I have read about the sympton...
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Tiff5484
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2
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332
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lying
(Preview)
Hi-I just got some great advice from my sponsor. Dont take lying personally. My A spouse lied to me on our vacation but I just discovered it yesterday. In the past when she lied I felt like my world was ending. How could she do this to me???? I am on the honest end of the spectrum. I make a point of it. I...
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Lyne
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9
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772
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Going out of town
(Preview)
Hi MIP Family Going camping to the wilderness of NJ There is no electricity nor computer access. I will definitely go into withdrawal and will miss you all See you Friday
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hotrod
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6
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201
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Meetings?
(Preview)
Are the meetings still going on here! I have attended many in the past. I tried to get in today.I put my nickname and did connect and it acted like it was connecting but went black. I use java. I don't use mirc. LIN
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afglin
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3
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160
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Havent got a clue what to do :(
(Preview)
Hi All Not sure really where to start my husband has had a severe alcohol problem on and off for about 8 years. About 2 years ago he got help went to the point of being completely sober for about a year and then I started seeing the signs slowly creeping in one by one. ~The last two or three months have been th...
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beryl80
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13
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656
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Changing my number
(Preview)
i've just received another delightful text message from my alcoholic mother.. stupidly i text her last night admitting i was hurt about her preferring to spend time with her lodgers daughter than me when i have always tried to meet up with her, go shopping, spend time, but she's NEVER been interested...
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qwerty49
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4
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534
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CLOSURE?
(Preview)
What is closure, what does it really mean to us, is there ever really closure when a loved one dies? In support and respect....oldergal
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oldergal
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10
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396
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My husband said he thinks he does have a problem.
(Preview)
I have not been able to find a Al-anon meeting close enough for me to attend in person so I started attending one online nightly. I wasn't going to say anything to my AH about what I was doing because I thought it would seem like I was doing it to bother him. I have done that a lot in the past. I would start couns...
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kkm215
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6
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380
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I had a good day
(Preview)
After the last couple of days where I was sick with worry about my son, I decided to be nice to myself today. I went to a Caribbean Carnival with a friend and later enjoyed some ice cream. I am so grateful for today! Trying very hard to take it one day at a time.
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Rose50
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7
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295
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My Dad
(Preview)
So, I'm watching the behavior of my dad who I'm so blessed to just observe right now without judging. I'm watching the moods switch; the feisty behaviors; the way I look to me first as if somehow it's suggested I'm the problem and I watch how quick I am to catch myself today and realize I am Not His problem...
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MeTwo2
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3
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358
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Am I too sensitive?
(Preview)
i apologize in advance...my laptop is about done and doesnt like punctuation so forgive the strange way i am writing. Am I too sensitive? On the other thread I started a couple of days ago, I mentioned someone had called to tell me: this just is not working for me so Im shutting this whole thing down...re...
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cwya
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22
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4996
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my progress according to the promises
(Preview)
I started having a realistic look at my situation right now, and see how far I have come since I started the work in Al Anon over 1 year ago ....it was invisible throughout the confusion, the blaming, the fights, and the storm, but now that peace is slowly coming within me, I can judge more clearly. So I had...
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tortuga
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5
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387
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Free .. not that free .. however free enough for the moment . .
(Preview)
I am free from court until October .. he plays his cards right and I won't be available again until after the new year .. lol. Oi .. not what I had in mind however it just is what it is at this point. It's just a series of delays. He's really stupid if he pisses the judge off further. Mediation was a joke at t...
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Pushka
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3
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379
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Behaviors of an alcoholic.....or a "dry" alcoholic...
(Preview)
Hi everyone, I am somewhat new to al-anon. I have been married to an alcoholic for 10+ years, but I was in denial. I know there are still "alcoholic behaviors" that I want to look out for. In my CoDependency meetings they have a long list of characteristics that may help you identify yoursel...
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sadsusie
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9
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5845
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new to this
(Preview)
Hello everyone, This is the first time I am posting something on this forum. My name is Lisa, I just turned 23 a couple of days ago and I am a child of alcoholics. My boyfriend of a year is also an alcoholic in recovery but has been sober on and off this past year. Currently he is sober and attending AA m...
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liisalove
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5
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362
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what a difference a day makes!
(Preview)
What a difference a day makes! I am so grateful that I can kind of make amends to my mom today! I have been able to w/o actually talking to her today been able to apologize for my behavior even if she doesn't accept it. I need to make another amends to my lil sis for being so ignorant about info & not being a...
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Hoot Nanny
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2
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192
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step work board
(Preview)
does anyone know why when i click on the step work board it goes to a defunct webpage called dream tools?
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cwya
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2
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195
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Staying true to myself.
(Preview)
I came across a quote yesterday. "Don't put a question mark where there should be a period. When something is over, move on" Last night, I met up with some friends I havn't seen in a about a year. They were happy to see me, which I expected. But as the night would go on, I began to remember what it w...
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slogan_jim
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6
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290
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Loving Alanon
(Preview)
Hi everyone I am a grateful member of Alanon and I wanted to share with you my love of this program and how it is helping me. I have been using my tools for 1 year and a half now and I have not always had a grip of my program through this time. I have slips and resort back to old ways like self pity, anger, martyrd...
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el-cee
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8
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328
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Prayers
(Preview)
Good Morning Please say a prayer for my son. I don't know where he is and I can't get a hold of him because his phone is either dead or turned off. No activity.... I pray I'm over reacting as in the past. I raised him up and gave him over to God...I can't do no more. ( hugs )
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Cathyinaz
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17
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567
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Blessing occurred
(Preview)
My son and my spouse have not spoken for 6 months. They are both addicts. Son is dry (pot) and spouse started recovery. Today they met with an alcohol counselor and are willing to make a fresh start. Our family's holidays had been all fouled up. The pain from this situation brought me to become ser...
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Lyne
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12
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267
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My son did not show up
(Preview)
My son was supposed to be at my place this morning to pick up his cellphone and hasn't come. No contact from him. We spoke last night and he had been so apologetic about standing me up last Wednesday and he's done it once again! I don't know what to think or do. Beside myself with worry. I need your prayers. ...
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Rose50
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9
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527
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