Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

oldshrink · oldshrink

My adult son (22 years old) entered a 90 day treatment program a little over four months ago, across the country. He chose to go and has so far maintained sobriety. We are supporting him financially although he is sort of looking for a part time job (he has great difficulty following through on any tasks...

Not2bforgot10 · Not2bforgot10

I wanted to write because I am feeling really anxious right now. Tomorrow I am supposed to either take the train or rental car to Vermont (I am in Philly now living with my recent ex POA ("POA" is basically a past/present partner) and her father, paying a minimal amount of rent). I will be stay...

buick23 · buick23

So bf called me a stupid b**** a few days ago and am still hurt. After not talking for 2 days he tells me on a voicemail we need to talk when I get back home. I get home, no talk. I asked about it, he yells at me again. Told him today I mine as well find myself another place to live and he can stay here. Told him I don'...

Katekat · Katekat

I'm not sure where to start really... My Mum died on Monday, she was 64 and an alcoholic, she died of liver failure and I am so confused as I have no idea of how to feel? She has been an alcoholic all of my life I guess although as a kid I didn't notice as much but the problems got worse as I reached my teens, our re...

GailMichelle · GailMichelle

Hello Everyone: I was reading a post tonight started by soxfan. The topic was based on listening to your gut feelings. I followed through with what my gut told me to do today. It was terribly difficult. We're divorcing; I initiated it some time ago (around 3 years back). Since he has difficulty fol...

soxfan · soxfan

My A has been sober this time around for 2 weeks...he has been sober on and off since January. The benders only last a couple of days and then he comes around. Everytime he relapses i kick him out. His most recent relapse was mothers day and again he got the boot. His last use was that day. He wanted to c...

Holly09 · Holly09

I know my A boyfriends behavior is his own and I am supposed to focus on me and mind my own business but I'm having a hard time right now. The sneaking around the house hiding his alcohol and thinking I don't know what is going on (when he carries a bucket from the car to the shed so I can't see what is in it) is r...

cuteamy7 · cuteamy7

Are there any other adult kids of verbally abusive/negative alcoholic mothers out there? I have lots of issues. She is bringing up stuff from 25-30 yrs ago when I was a teen. Fights with her. Anger with my father right before divorce. Saying I shouldn't love him because she doesn't. Saying I hate her...

give me strength · give me strength

I have recently become sober -- 6 weeks--and I would like my husband to attend an Al-Anon meeting. I am not sure how he feels about going alone to a meeting. My father is a recovering alcoholic for 10 years, does that mean I can also attend with my husband? Thanks for your help.

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am way ready for this feeling to end! I am still struggling but I will still survive! I have been determined to get past the stress & anxiety I have been facing for almost 4 weeks now. For those of you who have been following my posts, it is still just a sleep issue but sometimes more than that! I am anx...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((((Family)))), Although to many this weekend is the official start of summer, let us remember the true meaning behind Memorial Day. May we pause for a moment to honor those who gave their lives in service to this country so that we are able to enjoy the family picnics, the ballgames and all that life h...

Searching for Peace · Searching for Peace

haven't logged on or posted in a long time, me and my ah have been working on putting our lives back together. things have improved with him and the twins, but the drinking hasn't stopped and some days he drinks more than usual. tonight he got mad because i choose to go watch our son play 7/7 football and...

mclaughlin73 · mclaughlin73

My need to be with someone right now is overwhelming. I feel so alone, and in my warped thinking, I feel I need to be in a relationship, or at the very least, have sex with someone to make myself feel better. Last night I called an old girlfriend, who came by and we had dinner. I knew where my mind was, thank go...

Allee · Allee

My husband has been sober for 24 years. However, due to a recent back injury a few years ago he became addicted to pain medication. Addiction is addiction regardless of the drug. The same ugly cycle started all over again, the lies, the bills not being paid, him not working, the irresponsibility. ...

lyndebi · lyndebi

Essgee sparked something for me. Yesterday I woke up feeling horrible. Very down, depressed, dreams about my dead husband, and mother etc. I physically feel ill. shakey. know I cannot be around people. Had a lovely NOT my disablility symptom happen. My head just cannot soften anything. Why am I even...

seekingserenity · seekingserenity

A little over 5 years ago I fell in love. Come to find out one of "her" favorite words is freedom. I thought that it applied for the step I was taking in my life so I too adopted it as my favorite word. Every time, I said it, typed it, thought about it. I smiled. My heart felt happy cause it reminded...

katfshh · katfshh

I reunited with an old boyfriend in Jan of this year. He was sober for 5 years, then started drinking again. Then this time he was sober for a year. He was going to AA meetings every day. Has a sponser. He told me how bad he needs to stay sober and how much he has been through. And how committed to his sobrie...

zhotdogs99 · zhotdogs99

My A-fiance is so good at telling me what I want to hear, especially when I'm so upset and he can see that I'm thinking about my future and my choices. How did he get to be so good at this? He tells me he loves me more than anything, that he doesn't like who he is, that he knows he needs to stop, that he's so grat...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hi all, AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! lol I fell better now. Boy has it been a day and some of it my own making and some I don't know. I have posted before about the ex boyfriend. Was an "A" in recovery and then relapsed in April and that is when things ended for us. Well at the end of A...

White Rabbit · White Rabbit

For anyone that is in al-anon that has either been in AA first or gotten there afterward ... how do you know if your own alcohol consumption is a problem?

mclaughlin73 · mclaughlin73

Friends, I first want to say that I am so grateful for all the responses and welcomes to this website. My hope and steadfastness increased tremendously as I read each reply and message I got. Thank you very much, I can't explain how much I appreciate you all and this website. This awareness is so new to me...

mikeco · mikeco

Hi Everyone, I have not been to this board for a while. I have started coming back now that I have a little time at night. Both of my parents are Alcoholic. The disease goes back 4 generations in my family that I can easily trace, and probably further. Aunts, uncles, siblings, cousins. My family is a t...

Hopeless · Hopeless

I stepped out of my madness and reached out to a dear friend of mine who gave me some wonderful advice.. I realized some of the things I was doing wrong in the program I was taking on too much... I was practicing detachment, setting up boundaries,find my HP and focusing on myself (of course there is...

Hopeless · Hopeless

When does it end and when do they get it's not working anymore.... It's been a month since me and the A have been seperated and everything he says at this point is all lies = ( I'm almost offended that he thinks I'm that naive at this point... He called me at 7:15pm telling me he just got back from seeing an...

mclaughlin73 · mclaughlin73

Hi everyone, My name is Mike, and at the prodding of my therapist, I am going to get involved with my local Al-Anon meetings. I want to reach out to this community as well. I've read a few posts, and I like the how honest and expressive people are, and also that people respond with kindness, blunt truth, an...

looking_for_peace · looking_for_peace

-Asked AH to leave almost 2 months ago. -We have managed to be civil with minor ups and downs until now. -He is accusing me of a lot of weird things: *After he found out I cancelled our sponsored child (I did this to save money...long story), he was furious. He tried to renew the sponsorship and hasn't hear...

Hopeless · Hopeless

It's amazing how such a simple act as calling your friend for a good laugh feels = ) I actually forgot that feeling since I was so consumed with the A and felt/prayed that him being in a good mood was my only way to happiness.... I'm so thankful for these little presents that I get ever now and then since I le...

Jerry F · Jerry F

Aloha MIP Family....In a previous thread I spoke about a major relapse I had where I stepped way out of bounds on a complusive "fix binge" that took me by surprise (don't know why that is what I use to do on a regular basis with my very own alcoholic wife) and a couple of other people also. I did t...

Criket · Criket

Hello everyone,I went to the chat room but no one was there so I am coming here to "talk" as I am hurting so much. As some of you have read before I have been going through this awful stuff we go through with my daughter who is 33 and has 2 kids. She has almost lost them to the courts several times and...

FuzzyLogic · FuzzyLogic

I am sure this has to have come up in posts along the way. I cannot seem to locate a way to search so I figure I would post and maybe someone can shed some light on things. I am not a prude by any stretch of the imagination. I am however, clear on how I want to be treated. Respect is important to me. Sex is more emot...

Cosmos · Cosmos

Hi I wrote earlier about how I struggle to detach myself from my ex-girlfriend (in recovery in AA) after she broke up with me about a month ago. We are still not speaking and I am in the space where I absolutely dont know how she is. Thats the first time since I met her more than three years ago. Although I am f...

angelbreeze127 · angelbreeze127

called the cops on my h yesterday over verbal abuse of our son... I am in a trance... VEry confused.. a mixture of emotions... part of me wants to beg him to change into waht I want and the other just feels incredibly sad. As it stands now he is moving on 6/12.

Aloha · Aloha

I attended a great birthday meeting tonight. It was great for me to get out. I could have found a million excuses not to go... I'm stressed, tired, I had worked earlier today at my second part-time job, then when to an exercise class... I had laundry to do at home, I should get my lunches ready for the week....

RLC · RLC

My son is graduating from Law School tomorrow. He was six when his Mother and I were married. We hear lots of stories on this board about sons who have problems related to addiction or other problems, and my heart always goes out to them. But I felt I needed to to say something about my son, you notice I did...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

HAD A GOOD NIGHT LAST NIGHT. MY TOPS GROUP HAD WHAT WE CALL AN SRD & SINCE I REACHED MY GOAL 3 YEARS AGO, I GOT REINSTATED AFTER REGAINING & TAKING OFF POUNDS SENSIBLY--THAT IS WHAT TOPS STANDS FOR: TAKE OFF POUNDS SENSIBLY! I GOT ALL DECKED OUT WITH A 100 DOLLAR DRESS WHICH SEEMS EXCESSIVE BUT I FE...

maresie · maresie

I am finding that self pity is my alcohol. If I go into that space which I can very quickly as its almost a reflex I'm done for. I live around roommates who live, eat and sleep self pity and resent everything and everyone. Needless to say I once fit in very nicely with them since I blamed, resented and rai...

barisax · barisax

She will be soon. DramaGoddess needs all the prayers she can get now. All that bipolar and alcoholic blood in her has been coming to a boil the past year. She slowly climbs back to reality, but as she nears a chance to come home, she slips back into psychotic breaks. Mom is hanging in there but she nee...

essgee1952 · essgee1952

I was having a bad morning of arguments about money with my AH, and Carol Burnett happened to come on a morning talk show with Bonnie Hunt. They talked about Carol's daughter, Carrie Hamilton, who as you may know died of cancer at 38 (after overcoming multiple addictions, BTW). She told a story about...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hi all, I am really not sure where this thread is going to go. I am just going to get in the car and see where it takes me. I have a nagging voice in the back of my head and sometimes just hearing her out is the only way I can get her to shut up. I have had an up and down week emotionally and what it all comes down to rea...

Aloha · Aloha

After two years of really not knowing where I wanted to go in my relationship with my AH after discovering he'd been cheating on me and hiding a sexual identity issue, I've finally decided it's time. I actually reached a decision that "enough was enough" during a counseling session with hi...

My Three Things Org · My Three Things Org

Hi! I'm Kimberly with the My Three Things Organization. Website: http://MyThreeThings.org My step-father was an alcoholic. I grew up watching him physically abuse and verbally shame my mother. I know firsthand how difficult it is when someone close to you has an addiction. It takes a lot of courag...

Hopeless · Hopeless

http://religion.blogs.cnn.com/2010/05/20/what-makes-people-happy/?hpt=C2

Hopeless · Hopeless

I'm up for a promotion which is a good thing but I also know the position I'm in personally (just starting the program and dealing the A) and it scares me! I need to focus more on myself I'm making that promise to myself and for my kids!!! I want them to see their mother happy = ) This will be huge for me, s...

Sweet Stanley · Sweet Stanley

I am new to this site. I have read a lot of the messages here and I am hoping that it will help me too. My AH has been to rehab 3 times and is attending AA meetings but still "slips" quite regularly. He has quite a few medical issues that have been going on for years now. (We have been married 32 y...

Hopeless · Hopeless

It's beautiful out today = ) I feel a lot better after the online meeting last night (thanks, Kitty)... Today the focus is BACK on ME.... * I have this thing with crows the scare me for some reason, lol... I was walking the puppy this morning and I saw a crow flying away with a little bird chasing it as i...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

((((((((((((((((((Friends)))))))))))))))))))), Well finally i have moved forward to make a new start in my life. I am actually going back to school....it's offical...got my letter of acceptance today....wow...mind blowing for me. Here I sit 49, widow and guess what it's ok....amazing what...

angelbreeze127 · angelbreeze127

I read one of the last responses from this morning's post and I felt AGAIN as though I had done something wrong. I refer to him as a loser becasue I am so ripped to shreds from the last 13 years of life with him. His abusive vulgar name calling and pushing of my teen daughter, his verbally abusive namecalli...

tkyater2003 · tkyater2003

how does evevryone go on and live and all how do the ones that have signifant other stay with thier partners how do we do it go on day after day day after day yes i knew when i got with him he drank and all but how does one go on

Hopeless · Hopeless

In previous post I've explained the situation with my daughter having seizures, hospital visits and doctors appts... I've had to take a lot of time off of work (we just merged with another company so I have to apply for my position again).. Of course when it rains it pours - My daughters sitter h...

DreamsOver · DreamsOver

Thank you all for giving me the encouragement I need right now. My AS has been gone for several days and that can only mean one thing, I don't know where he is but my HP does, I pray I can keep that in my thoughts so that I can go on and do the things that I need to do for my family and myself. My other son that has Au...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hi Family, AGO's thread on the hardware store really got me thinking. Which is sometimes a scary thing. Right before lunch I had an IM from a friend who is in AA and struggling. He has had a few relapses and is sitting at about a week without drinking and working his steps again. I sometimes struggle with w...

lindadianne · lindadianne

Hi I ave just joined this site and I'm having difficulties with boundries of where my responsibiliy to help ends ,and how to know how much to give to others time energy and money wise? It seems such a hard thing for me to work out. I come from a family of 12 and my father was either a very heavy drinker or an...

AGO · AGO

So I go to The Hardware Store.....I walk in...look around, the place is HUGE, I am in Heaven!!!!. They have plants, tools, every kitchen appliance known to man, sodas, candy bars....I wander around for hours like a kid in a candy store, this place has everything I will ever need. I walk up to the teller,...

RandomSparkles · RandomSparkles

I need to ask how do you move on from the anger and heartache? My husband was sober for almost 2 decades and then fell off the wagon for 18 months. He now has over 100 days sober. His drinking and legal problems which were brought on by his behaviour while drinking has cost us so much emotionally and finan...

FuzzyLogic · FuzzyLogic

Sorry this is so long and may contain TMI. I am so damn sick of being told that everything I do is wrong. The entire time we have been together I have been mean to him. All the millions of little things he seeks out to justify attacking me or putting me down. My sanity is beyond questionable at this point. The...

RLC · RLC

I just found out this morning that I may have two Alcoholics in my home. I have known about the human A for 18 years now. But this morning I found two Natural Lite beer cans (my wifes drink of choice) chewed up in the computer room. My one year old Black Lab Ellie it seems has become addicted. I found all t...

zhotdogs99 · zhotdogs99

How do you know when it's time to leave your alcoholic loved one and begin a new life? When is enough enough? I've read that only you can know and it's different for every person, but it's something I've been thinking about for the last few weeks. I'm so burned out over my fiance's alcoholism, especia...

lizzakiss · lizzakiss

It's been a while since I posted. I've been working my program and steps as has the Abf-sober and we've been doing pretty well. bumps in the road here and there but who doesn't have them? My doc recently put me on Zoloft due to some mega job related stress and mild depression plus he feels I may have PMDD i...

Jerry F · Jerry F

I'm grateful for it; the program, and the people in it and for the recovery and growth. At times I'm even grateful for the hard work and as I remembered this morning before going to make my apology my early sponsor reminding me "liking it is optional". I don't like it when others come after m...

Priscilla83 · Priscilla83

So I saw my AH on thursday at his mom's birthday party and we agreed he couls come over to my house the next day. Once again he started talking about us getting back together, and finally I gave in. I say I gave in cause in the past I told him there was no chance in hell I would get back together with him until he...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Dealing with Adult Son in Recovery (Preview) My adult son (22 years old) entered a 90 day treatment program a little over four months ago, across the country. He chose to go and has so far maintained sobriety. We are supporting him financially although he is sort of looking for a part time job (he has great difficulty following through on any tasks...	oldshrink	2	747	May 31, 2010 by Ness
	How do I learn to love and nurture myself? fear grief change transition dependency self-nurturing (Preview) I wanted to write because I am feeling really anxious right now. Tomorrow I am supposed to either take the train or rental car to Vermont (I am in Philly now living with my recent ex POA ("POA" is basically a past/present partner) and her father, paying a minimal amount of rent). I will be stay...	Not2bforgot10	5	6542	May 30, 2010 by kitty
	venting (Preview) So bf called me a stupid b**** a few days ago and am still hurt. After not talking for 2 days he tells me on a voicemail we need to talk when I get back home. I get home, no talk. I asked about it, he yells at me again. Told him today I mine as well find myself another place to live and he can stay here. Told him I don'...	buick23	3	552	May 30, 2010 by RLC
	New to all of this... (Preview) I'm not sure where to start really... My Mum died on Monday, she was 64 and an alcoholic, she died of liver failure and I am so confused as I have no idea of how to feel? She has been an alcoholic all of my life I guess although as a kid I didn't notice as much but the problems got worse as I reached my teens, our re...	Katekat	10	804	May 30, 2010 by Katekat
	Listening to Thy Gut (Preview) Hello Everyone: I was reading a post tonight started by soxfan. The topic was based on listening to your gut feelings. I followed through with what my gut told me to do today. It was terribly difficult. We're divorcing; I initiated it some time ago (around 3 years back). Since he has difficulty fol...	GailMichelle	4	824	May 30, 2010 by GailMichelle
	Good choice or Bad choice??? (Preview) My A has been sober this time around for 2 weeks...he has been sober on and off since January. The benders only last a couple of days and then he comes around. Everytime he relapses i kick him out. His most recent relapse was mothers day and again he got the boot. His last use was that day. He wanted to c...	soxfan	7	887	May 30, 2010 by soxfan
	just irritated and know better (Preview) I know my A boyfriends behavior is his own and I am supposed to focus on me and mind my own business but I'm having a hard time right now. The sneaking around the house hiding his alcohol and thinking I don't know what is going on (when he carries a bucket from the car to the shed so I can't see what is in it) is r...	Holly09	2	631	May 30, 2010 by Karilynn
	1st Post-Verbal Stress from Mom (Preview) Are there any other adult kids of verbally abusive/negative alcoholic mothers out there? I have lots of issues. She is bringing up stuff from 25-30 yrs ago when I was a teen. Fights with her. Anger with my father right before divorce. Saying I shouldn't love him because she doesn't. Saying I hate her...	cuteamy7	4	846	May 29, 2010 by RLC
	Who can attend Al-Anon meetings? (Preview) I have recently become sober -- 6 weeks--and I would like my husband to attend an Al-Anon meeting. I am not sure how he feels about going alone to a meeting. My father is a recovering alcoholic for 10 years, does that mean I can also attend with my husband? Thanks for your help.	give me strength	2	829	May 29, 2010 by abbyal
	I AM DETERMINED--IT IS GONNA END! (Preview) I am way ready for this feeling to end! I am still struggling but I will still survive! I have been determined to get past the stress & anxiety I have been facing for almost 4 weeks now. For those of you who have been following my posts, it is still just a sleep issue but sometimes more than that! I am anx...	Hoot Nanny	4	802	May 29, 2010 by Jennifer
	Memorial Day (Preview) (((((Family)))), Although to many this weekend is the official start of summer, let us remember the true meaning behind Memorial Day. May we pause for a moment to honor those who gave their lives in service to this country so that we are able to enjoy the family picnics, the ballgames and all that life h...	Karilynn	1	533	May 29, 2010 by RLC
	Here we go again.... (Preview) haven't logged on or posted in a long time, me and my ah have been working on putting our lives back together. things have improved with him and the twins, but the drinking hasn't stopped and some days he drinks more than usual. tonight he got mad because i choose to go watch our son play 7/7 football and...	Searching for Peace	5	779	May 28, 2010 by tlcate
	Ugh, mornings are rough... (Preview) My need to be with someone right now is overwhelming. I feel so alone, and in my warped thinking, I feel I need to be in a relationship, or at the very least, have sex with someone to make myself feel better. Last night I called an old girlfriend, who came by and we had dinner. I knew where my mind was, thank go...	mclaughlin73	7	775	May 28, 2010 by Mandy123
	Second Chance ? (Preview) My husband has been sober for 24 years. However, due to a recent back injury a few years ago he became addicted to pain medication. Addiction is addiction regardless of the drug. The same ugly cycle started all over again, the lies, the bills not being paid, him not working, the irresponsibility. ...	Allee	2	877	May 28, 2010 by Allee
	I am two people (Preview) Essgee sparked something for me. Yesterday I woke up feeling horrible. Very down, depressed, dreams about my dead husband, and mother etc. I physically feel ill. shakey. know I cannot be around people. Had a lovely NOT my disablility symptom happen. My head just cannot soften anything. Why am I even...	lyndebi	12	852	May 28, 2010 by lyndebi
	FREEDOM (Preview) A little over 5 years ago I fell in love. Come to find out one of "her" favorite words is freedom. I thought that it applied for the step I was taking in my life so I too adopted it as my favorite word. Every time, I said it, typed it, thought about it. I smiled. My heart felt happy cause it reminded...	seekingserenity	1	914	May 27, 2010 by Jerry F
	New here, can't stop crying (Preview) I reunited with an old boyfriend in Jan of this year. He was sober for 5 years, then started drinking again. Then this time he was sober for a year. He was going to AA meetings every day. Has a sponser. He told me how bad he needs to stay sober and how much he has been through. And how committed to his sobrie...	katfshh	13	1010	May 27, 2010 by katfshh
	For the first time I stopped hearing my A and instead heard the quacking! (Preview) My A-fiance is so good at telling me what I want to hear, especially when I'm so upset and he can see that I'm thinking about my future and my choices. How did he get to be so good at this? He tells me he loves me more than anything, that he doesn't like who he is, that he knows he needs to stop, that he's so grat...	zhotdogs99	9	875	May 27, 2010 by Aloha
	Manipulations (Preview) Hi all, AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! lol I fell better now. Boy has it been a day and some of it my own making and some I don't know. I have posted before about the ex boyfriend. Was an "A" in recovery and then relapsed in April and that is when things ended for us. Well at the end of A...	Mandy123	7	816	May 27, 2010 by maresie
	Double winners question (Preview) For anyone that is in al-anon that has either been in AA first or gotten there afterward ... how do you know if your own alcohol consumption is a problem?	White Rabbit	8	1589	May 27, 2010 by barisax
	Need wisdom and experience (Preview) Friends, I first want to say that I am so grateful for all the responses and welcomes to this website. My hope and steadfastness increased tremendously as I read each reply and message I got. Thank you very much, I can't explain how much I appreciate you all and this website. This awareness is so new to me...	mclaughlin73	9	856	May 27, 2010 by kitty
	Hi everyone (Preview) Hi Everyone, I have not been to this board for a while. I have started coming back now that I have a little time at night. Both of my parents are Alcoholic. The disease goes back 4 generations in my family that I can easily trace, and probably further. Aunts, uncles, siblings, cousins. My family is a t...	mikeco	6	559	May 26, 2010 by mikeco
	Insight = ) (Preview) I stepped out of my madness and reached out to a dear friend of mine who gave me some wonderful advice.. I realized some of the things I was doing wrong in the program I was taking on too much... I was practicing detachment, setting up boundaries,find my HP and focusing on myself (of course there is...	Hopeless	3	872	May 26, 2010 by Andrea12
	LIES, LIES and MORE LIES!!! (Preview) When does it end and when do they get it's not working anymore.... It's been a month since me and the A have been seperated and everything he says at this point is all lies = ( I'm almost offended that he thinks I'm that naive at this point... He called me at 7:15pm telling me he just got back from seeing an...	Hopeless	11	1116	May 25, 2010 by Melissa21
	Coming to grips... (Preview) Hi everyone, My name is Mike, and at the prodding of my therapist, I am going to get involved with my local Al-Anon meetings. I want to reach out to this community as well. I've read a few posts, and I like the how honest and expressive people are, and also that people respond with kindness, blunt truth, an...	mclaughlin73	10	864	May 25, 2010 by Jennifer
	Is his behaviour common-or am I really insane?! (Preview) -Asked AH to leave almost 2 months ago. -We have managed to be civil with minor ups and downs until now. -He is accusing me of a lot of weird things: *After he found out I cancelled our sponsored child (I did this to save money...long story), he was furious. He tried to renew the sponsorship and hasn't hear...	looking_for_peace	10	1164	May 25, 2010 by mon123
	A moment = ) (Preview) It's amazing how such a simple act as calling your friend for a good laugh feels = ) I actually forgot that feeling since I was so consumed with the A and felt/prayed that him being in a good mood was my only way to happiness.... I'm so thankful for these little presents that I get ever now and then since I le...	Hopeless	2	751	May 25, 2010 by lyndebi
	The amends continues. (Preview) Aloha MIP Family....In a previous thread I spoke about a major relapse I had where I stepped way out of bounds on a complusive "fix binge" that took me by surprise (don't know why that is what I use to do on a regular basis with my very own alcoholic wife) and a couple of other people also. I did t...	Jerry F	13	1173	May 25, 2010 by Ness
	HURTING Again! (Preview) Hello everyone,I went to the chat room but no one was there so I am coming here to "talk" as I am hurting so much. As some of you have read before I have been going through this awful stuff we go through with my daughter who is 33 and has 2 kids. She has almost lost them to the courts several times and...	Criket	5	707	May 25, 2010 by Criket
	Sex issues---warning may not be for everyone to read (Preview) I am sure this has to have come up in posts along the way. I cannot seem to locate a way to search so I figure I would post and maybe someone can shed some light on things. I am not a prude by any stretch of the imagination. I am however, clear on how I want to be treated. Respect is important to me. Sex is more emot...	FuzzyLogic	21	1650	May 25, 2010 by idontknow
	Struggling, but doing so willingly (Preview) Hi I wrote earlier about how I struggle to detach myself from my ex-girlfriend (in recovery in AA) after she broke up with me about a month ago. We are still not speaking and I am in the space where I absolutely dont know how she is. Thats the first time since I met her more than three years ago. Although I am f...	Cosmos	7	878	May 25, 2010 by Cosmos
	cops (Preview) called the cops on my h yesterday over verbal abuse of our son... I am in a trance... VEry confused.. a mixture of emotions... part of me wants to beg him to change into waht I want and the other just feels incredibly sad. As it stands now he is moving on 6/12.	angelbreeze127	9	846	May 24, 2010 by Tattyhead
	Airing things out (Preview) I attended a great birthday meeting tonight. It was great for me to get out. I could have found a million excuses not to go... I'm stressed, tired, I had worked earlier today at my second part-time job, then when to an exercise class... I had laundry to do at home, I should get my lunches ready for the week....	Aloha	6	572	May 24, 2010 by Tattyhead
	Sharing about My Son (Preview) My son is graduating from Law School tomorrow. He was six when his Mother and I were married. We hear lots of stories on this board about sons who have problems related to addiction or other problems, and my heart always goes out to them. But I felt I needed to to say something about my son, you notice I did...	RLC	14	1166	May 24, 2010 by Jozie
	Yay! (Preview) HAD A GOOD NIGHT LAST NIGHT. MY TOPS GROUP HAD WHAT WE CALL AN SRD & SINCE I REACHED MY GOAL 3 YEARS AGO, I GOT REINSTATED AFTER REGAINING & TAKING OFF POUNDS SENSIBLY--THAT IS WHAT TOPS STANDS FOR: TAKE OFF POUNDS SENSIBLY! I GOT ALL DECKED OUT WITH A 100 DOLLAR DRESS WHICH SEEMS EXCESSIVE BUT I FE...	Hoot Nanny	5	706	May 24, 2010 by Hoot Nanny
	Self pity (Preview) I am finding that self pity is my alcohol. If I go into that space which I can very quickly as its almost a reflex I'm done for. I live around roommates who live, eat and sleep self pity and resent everything and everyone. Needless to say I once fit in very nicely with them since I blamed, resented and rai...	maresie	5	1748	May 24, 2010 by maresie
	The Drama Goddess at 16 (Preview) She will be soon. DramaGoddess needs all the prayers she can get now. All that bipolar and alcoholic blood in her has been coming to a boil the past year. She slowly climbs back to reality, but as she nears a chance to come home, she slips back into psychotic breaks. Mom is hanging in there but she nee...	barisax	8	909	May 24, 2010 by Rita G
	Loving My Life (At Least Trying...) (Preview) I was having a bad morning of arguments about money with my AH, and Carol Burnett happened to come on a morning talk show with Bonnie Hunt. They talked about Carol's daughter, Carrie Hamilton, who as you may know died of cancer at 38 (after overcoming multiple addictions, BTW). She told a story about...	essgee1952	11	916	May 23, 2010 by Andrea12
	Seeing my disease (Preview) Hi all, I am really not sure where this thread is going to go. I am just going to get in the car and see where it takes me. I have a nagging voice in the back of my head and sometimes just hearing her out is the only way I can get her to shut up. I have had an up and down week emotionally and what it all comes down to rea...	Mandy123	8	969	May 23, 2010 by Andrea12
	I've asked for a divorce. (Preview) After two years of really not knowing where I wanted to go in my relationship with my AH after discovering he'd been cheating on me and hiding a sexual identity issue, I've finally decided it's time. I actually reached a decision that "enough was enough" during a counseling session with hi...	Aloha	17	1242	May 23, 2010 by blender_girl
	Participation in Forgiveness Project! forgiveness healing let go love shame guilt my three things (Preview) Hi! I'm Kimberly with the My Three Things Organization. Website: http://MyThreeThings.org My step-father was an alcoholic. I grew up watching him physically abuse and verbally shame my mother. I know firsthand how difficult it is when someone close to you has an addiction. It takes a lot of courag...	My Three Things Org	0	5649	May 23, 2010 by My Three Things Org
	Found this interesting.... (Preview) http://religion.blogs.cnn.com/2010/05/20/what-makes-people-happy/?hpt=C2	Hopeless	4	856	May 22, 2010 by tlcate
	Big Change... (Preview) I'm up for a promotion which is a good thing but I also know the position I'm in personally (just starting the program and dealing the A) and it scares me! I need to focus more on myself I'm making that promise to myself and for my kids!!! I want them to see their mother happy = ) This will be huge for me, s...	Hopeless	4	826	May 21, 2010 by abbyal
	My Story (Preview) I am new to this site. I have read a lot of the messages here and I am hoping that it will help me too. My AH has been to rehab 3 times and is attending AA meetings but still "slips" quite regularly. He has quite a few medical issues that have been going on for years now. (We have been married 32 y...	Sweet Stanley	8	1033	May 21, 2010 by Sweet Stanley
	New Day = ) (Preview) It's beautiful out today = ) I feel a lot better after the online meeting last night (thanks, Kitty)... Today the focus is BACK on ME.... * I have this thing with crows the scare me for some reason, lol... I was walking the puppy this morning and I saw a crow flying away with a little bird chasing it as i...	Hopeless	5	1060	May 21, 2010 by kitty
	Moving Forward (Preview) ((((((((((((((((((Friends)))))))))))))))))))), Well finally i have moved forward to make a new start in my life. I am actually going back to school....it's offical...got my letter of acceptance today....wow...mind blowing for me. Here I sit 49, widow and guess what it's ok....amazing what...	Andrea12	15	841	May 20, 2010 by Andrea12
	I am sorry; but I am "mad" at some responses. (Preview) I read one of the last responses from this morning's post and I felt AGAIN as though I had done something wrong. I refer to him as a loser becasue I am so ripped to shreds from the last 13 years of life with him. His abusive vulgar name calling and pushing of my teen daughter, his verbally abusive namecalli...	angelbreeze127	21	1831	May 20, 2010 by tkyater2003
	have many questions (Preview) how does evevryone go on and live and all how do the ones that have signifant other stay with thier partners how do we do it go on day after day day after day yes i knew when i got with him he drank and all but how does one go on	tkyater2003	7	872	May 20, 2010 by tkyater2003
	Need to be STRONGER! (Preview) In previous post I've explained the situation with my daughter having seizures, hospital visits and doctors appts... I've had to take a lot of time off of work (we just merged with another company so I have to apply for my position again).. Of course when it rains it pours - My daughters sitter h...	Hopeless	7	877	May 19, 2010 by soxfan
	I Am So Grateful For This Board..... (Preview) Thank you all for giving me the encouragement I need right now. My AS has been gone for several days and that can only mean one thing, I don't know where he is but my HP does, I pray I can keep that in my thoughts so that I can go on and do the things that I need to do for my family and myself. My other son that has Au...	DreamsOver	7	933	May 19, 2010 by soxfan
	I can't give what I don't have (Preview) Hi Family, AGO's thread on the hardware store really got me thinking. Which is sometimes a scary thing. Right before lunch I had an IM from a friend who is in AA and struggling. He has had a few relapses and is sitting at about a week without drinking and working his steps again. I sometimes struggle with w...	Mandy123	7	933	May 19, 2010 by Andrea12
	Unclear boundry issues (Preview) Hi I ave just joined this site and I'm having difficulties with boundries of where my responsibiliy to help ends ,and how to know how much to give to others time energy and money wise? It seems such a hard thing for me to work out. I come from a family of 12 and my father was either a very heavy drinker or an...	lindadianne	11	1431	May 19, 2010 by lindadianne
	What is WRONG with Hardware Stores???? (Preview) So I go to The Hardware Store.....I walk in...look around, the place is HUGE, I am in Heaven!!!!. They have plants, tools, every kitchen appliance known to man, sodas, candy bars....I wander around for hours like a kid in a candy store, this place has everything I will ever need. I walk up to the teller,...	AGO	13	3634	May 19, 2010 by sirpher
	Where to start..... (Preview) I need to ask how do you move on from the anger and heartache? My husband was sober for almost 2 decades and then fell off the wagon for 18 months. He now has over 100 days sober. His drinking and legal problems which were brought on by his behaviour while drinking has cost us so much emotionally and finan...	RandomSparkles	5	916	May 19, 2010 by abbyal
	Can't do anything right. (Preview) Sorry this is so long and may contain TMI. I am so damn sick of being told that everything I do is wrong. The entire time we have been together I have been mean to him. All the millions of little things he seeks out to justify attacking me or putting me down. My sanity is beyond questionable at this point. The...	FuzzyLogic	6	1277	May 19, 2010 by FuzzyLogic
	Doggie Al-Anon ??? (Preview) I just found out this morning that I may have two Alcoholics in my home. I have known about the human A for 18 years now. But this morning I found two Natural Lite beer cans (my wifes drink of choice) chewed up in the computer room. My one year old Black Lab Ellie it seems has become addicted. I found all t...	RLC	10	1247	May 19, 2010 by aprilleaves
	How did you know when it was time to leave? (Preview) How do you know when it's time to leave your alcoholic loved one and begin a new life? When is enough enough? I've read that only you can know and it's different for every person, but it's something I've been thinking about for the last few weeks. I'm so burned out over my fiance's alcoholism, especia...	zhotdogs99	12	3611	May 19, 2010 by zhotdogs99
	Why can't emotional baggage get lost at baggage claim? (Preview) It's been a while since I posted. I've been working my program and steps as has the Abf-sober and we've been doing pretty well. bumps in the road here and there but who doesn't have them? My doc recently put me on Zoloft due to some mega job related stress and mild depression plus he feels I may have PMDD i...	lizzakiss	6	666	May 19, 2010 by blender_girl
	It's not required that you like it... (Preview) I'm grateful for it; the program, and the people in it and for the recovery and growth. At times I'm even grateful for the hard work and as I remembered this morning before going to make my apology my early sponsor reminding me "liking it is optional". I don't like it when others come after m...	Jerry F	7	941	May 19, 2010 by blender_girl
	Doing the right thing? (Preview) So I saw my AH on thursday at his mom's birthday party and we agreed he couls come over to my house the next day. Once again he started talking about us getting back together, and finally I gave in. I say I gave in cause in the past I told him there was no chance in hell I would get back together with him until he...	Priscilla83	3	790	May 18, 2010 by Jerry F
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.