Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I just want to say even though it sounds like I might be off my rocker at times, I do speak to my sponsor & Al anon friends almost daily either by text, email or phone. I have been reading Al anon literature daily & some times it even makes sense to me. I am just working on getting some sanity back. FYI...

cms1122 · cms1122

Hello all...this is my first time posting here..I'm somewhat familiar with forums but this particular one is brand new for me. Al-Anon is not new to me (my ODAT book is dated 1972...haha)....but the season of my life that I find myself in requires a BIG return to Al-Anon principals...lol So, I have re...

neshema2 · neshema2

I saw this today and it actually brought up some compassion from me to ME...Yea..I actually said to myself "ok, we didn't know it then... The cruel assessments of me I bought, but no more...I will work my inventory, thank you" I felt a sense of sadness that I didn't see it for all those decade...

neshema2 · neshema2

I said on my post that I was gonna wait to get back in harness (read, and post) , but I saw sooo many "need to read/respond to" posts that I could not resist.. First, I would like to say Welcome to the new comers...U came to the right place... Recovery can be hard..Sad...But nothing worthwhile...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

Hello, everyone. Just wanted to let you all know that I will not be around much. I'll probably come on and check for private messages every so often, though. I have come to realize that I'm not growing. I'm obviously not working my program very well. I'm stuck and I'm choosing to stay there because...

grateful2be · grateful2be

I called my son tonight at our usual time. Haven't talked with him since a few days after his surgery. He was pleasant and watching a pre-season football game. He didn't want to talk with me long. He was happy watching his game. I loved it. I did what I wanted to do. Check in with him. He did what he w...

Stevens · Stevens

Hello. My name is Stephanie, and my husband is an alcoholic.... thought I would use the old stand by intro! My attempt at levity. We have been married four years. I always knew he drank a lot. I should, of course, have seen the signs. But I ignored them, and my inner voice. He is trying to stay sober now...

neshema2 · neshema2

Hey all just stopping in to update Had a REAL good work w/AA friend/coo-sponsor on my step 4.....I had to go on R&R to do this and feel the pain of yet more Crap to clean up on me....I discovered that (no surprise) that I am still fear based..especially my needs being met and my AA friend and I went over...

debhud · debhud

Hi all, I am having trouble with my relationship with my parents who are enablers to my AS. They choose to pay all of his bills and watch his son because he is too hung over to watch him. He is addicted to alcohol and they are addicted to him. I on the other hand try to stay on course with my alanon principl...

Bettina · Bettina

"Time is constantly passing, one moment following fast upon the other. That's why its so important to press forward boldly,without complaining or fretting. The person who looks to the future and keeps moving ahead is eternally youthful. Such a person's heart is filled with flowers and shin...

Pushka · Pushka

Boy am I a slow learner and a fast forgetter! I have had a couple of humbling lessons in the God of my understanding giving me what I need vs what I want .. that's ok. I'm having a clearer picture that the Pushka plan isn't what it needs to be .. I don't necessarily like it .. I do have to come to accept it's n...

Tracy · Tracy

Hi All, I am sharing my story tomorrow in the afternoon of the convention with AA and al anon present. It will be the first time my partner (sober ABF) has heard my story. The theme is hope and sobriety, today we have sobriety in our home life is not perfect but so much better. It is thanks to both fellowsh...

Bettina · Bettina

"True Ease and comfort are not found in a quiet,uneventful life. This may sound paradoxical, but hardships bring about ease and comfort. For only by establising strong individual lives capable of boldly challenging difficult obstacles can we find true Peace and security in this lifetime....

wings of a dove · wings of a dove

I can't take anymore. Do I have to take abuse? What do you do when you work and make too much for help, yet not enough to even pay house and ulities. I have serious health issues too. I'm 3 years from retirement and I have to keep my health insurance? I have faith in God but I have to be realistic too.

Highlyfavored · Highlyfavored

It seems the better I get at detaching from my A/A's (daughter and her son), I feel spiritually disconnected from them, I know I still love them, but I mostly feel sadness/fear when I think of them, sad because of their bad choices/circumstances they are in and fear they will try to con/manipulate me in...

Melly1248 · Melly1248

This evening- as my AB was getting himself good and drunk in celebration of it being Friday, he mentioned to me that a house we had previously looked at was up for rent again, and that he would like to take another look at it. Then he grew serious and said "I have a concern though. The house has a lot of s...

Lyne · Lyne

Hi all-My life got so hectic and busy and I have felt pressure from work, 90 yr old mom, son and spouse issues, etc., etc., etc. However, I have missed the board and hopefully can get back to checking in as I used to. Each day I couldn't get here I wondered howall wondered how everyone was doing and I wanted t...

Jerry F · Jerry F

I was at my physical therapy session and had the early good fortune of almost being one on one with my therapist which was cool. She is a young doctor and good at what she does and I was expressing honest gratitude. Over a bit of time others started to come into the place and I went from massage table to e...

Melly1248 · Melly1248

I read a story recently- supposedly an AA story so I apologise if you guys have heard it before- but it was the most sensible and compelling reason to throw myself into recovery that I had ever heard. It sparked a change in me. I'll have to paraphrase but hopefully I'll convey the meaning. A woman is lost...

DavidG · DavidG

I was at an AA open meeting a month or two ago. After the meeting I was talking to a younger member. She said that when she got a few things sorted out in AA she would like to come along to Alanon. I turned to her, and smiled. I said, as far as I was concerned, if you are sober on the day, you are welcome. It is mayb...

rehprof · rehprof

the exA is at a family cottage on a lake for a week. the 11 yo and 16 yo boys are with him. One of the 11 yo's friends couldn't come with him bc his mom is not comfortable with the exA. When my son left at the beginning of the week, it was okay bc another friend would be able to come visit on thurs. I don't know wha...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am learning to face reality head on especially now that my mom is in the hospital & I am powerless over what happens to her from here. My hands are tied. My husband is her contact person not me. She chose him over me which I am finally getting over after less than a week. I am still at this point not talki...

neshema2 · neshema2

My issues, right now, are not alanon related....Its this financial fear, inability to find more income, depression and fighting off this financial fear.... Sadness and grief and yea, anger how my life could be taken from me and I kick myself for not knowing about alanon, coda till so late in my life...

John · John

Melly1248 · Melly1248

<- love this one, it's just perfect for today. What a night/morning. 'Scuse me posting a bit but it's really helping me stay focused to speak this stuff "out loud" and make myself face it. It's all much less confusing and stressful when I share it here because there's a clear path that I ne...

Melly1248 · Melly1248

So, first f2f meeting tomorrow at 1pm. I live in an extremely small town. There's one daytime and one night-time meeting per week. What if the people there don't like me? What if there is someone there from my daughter's school? One of the other parents? A teacher? What if someone sees me go in? The dog wo...

SunnySkies · SunnySkies

One of the meetings I attend is in the middle of a discussion about how we should deal with a mentally ill person who sometimes talks to herself during a meeting and when she shares she rants about strange things that have happened to her. Any suggestions on how we can solve this problem in a manner consi...

big dave · big dave

First timer on this forum. I am struggling with going down the same road again. Mom is reporting how good she is doing and asking for "another chance" but the last time I vowed not to deal with this ever again.

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Hi Everybody: In addition to checking in here for ESH several times a day, I have also been reading posts that I have started to pay attention to the progression of where I was when I came here at the start of 2012, and where I am today.. It has been helpful to see that I started as desperate, angry, bitter r...

slogan_jim · slogan_jim

Hi everyone, I am typing from my phone. My father texted me to advise that last night he got his second DUI. He didn't go into specifics but my sister, who lives with him, called to tell me. My dad texted me saying 'I **** up and got my 2nd dui. I am going to lose everything.' I am oddly serene about this. Feels...

Ms co-dependent · Ms co-dependent

Today I'm grateful to be alive and healthy and able to see things in another way. Today I choose to be happy and positive , I accept the fact that my husband is still sick and the fact he states he healthy, it's ok . Not to agree with it. I hold no resentment for Sunday night , if I had to go back and do that night o...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Hi All I have worked really really hard on myself this last week or so. Taking care of me the best way I can. I have my ups and downs but reality has set in and I have come to terms with it all. Peace is setting in. Al-anon has been my rock.......and HP my savior. So.......I get another text today from my s...

simonpopcorn · simonpopcorn

I have been friends with this person for roughly six years. She has a history of reckless behavior growing up, which supposedly ended with the birth of her son, but in reality just changed to accommodate him. She has created an identity as a fearless person who never backs down from life (fun), and woul...

grateful2be · grateful2be

I was driving one day with my list of complaints neatly tucked into a brain's compartment to my doctor's office. A driver cut in front of me. On the back of his car bumper a sticker - "Stop Global Whining." By the time I got to the doctor's office and he asked how I was doing, my answer was: &q...

gingerfizz · gingerfizz

Hi All, I am new here. I have attended a few online meetings and one F2F meeting last week. My A husband was so angry that I went to a F2F meeting. He doesn't know about the online ones. He has been dry a week. This resulted from an incident in which he drank way too much, embarrassed himself, and embarr...

hotrod · hotrod

http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t54653559/alanon-step-10/-- Edited by hotrod on Wednesday 14th of Augus...

Mom2beans · Mom2beans

This has been coming for a while. We have 2 girls 7 and 8. My husband drinks like a fish, and is now mixing pain pills and alcohol. I have been begging and threatening him for a year to get help or we were leaving. I feel like all I have done for the past year is bitch. On my way home from work last Tuesday I call to...

recoverylove101 · recoverylove101

Hi everyone. I am a double dipper of both AA and Al Anon and I have completed the 12 steps in AA. My lover and I have been together for 3 years. He has recently gone to Al Anon, gotten a sponsor and begun the 12 steps. His father is in AA, his step father was a rage-a-holic and I am in AA (he is surrounded!). He rec...

WorkingThroughIt · WorkingThroughIt

today I went to an Alanon open discussion mtg. this one older lady was sort of looking at me, just noticing me I guessed. I'm fairly new to that meeting. she spoke about God and how Alanon is a safe place. She seemed to be a more "senior member". what she said was met with widespread approval. i h...

WorkingThroughIt · WorkingThroughIt

I developed a pattern of rescuing ppeople at a fairly young age. as I got older my patterns became worse. I began to rescue abusive/unsafe guys. i always want the truth and am looking at this deeper. it believe it has to do with believing I am worthless and saving someone else to create my own self-esteem...

hisimage · hisimage

Is what my AH had to say to me last Friday. He is leaving for a week tomorrow and he thought it would be nice to spend some time together before he goes. I've been praying and pleading that I can get over myself and stop being so miserable. He sometimes will call me a sourpuss and he is right, I am. I don't want...

sandydv · sandydv

I am trtying so very hard to not cmpletley loose it, he has been so irritable moody miserable - am starting to come to the reallization he suffers from depresson and self mdicates with pot and booze I was awa on holiday with daughter without him for a week - I was looking forward to seeing him only to come...

grateful2be · grateful2be

Tonight was the first time I've spoken with my son since his surgery mid-week. My fears for him included his return to drugs after receiving drugs for the surgery AND I stayed out of it. Let him handle his own stuff with the surgeon he found in ways unknown to me. Kept my mouth shut. Since that day, he h...

WorkingThroughIt · WorkingThroughIt

I realize I'm top-posting a lot today but want to finish off with Solution. I am realizing that my disease (esp the Adult Child stuff) causes me to get very upset easily. I take things personally and am highly sensitive. It is time for me to do another brief inventory. Once a year or so when I feel it build u...

Jackie11 · Jackie11

Arriving home from the gym AH is on the phone with the cable company. We lost power and internet last night due to a big storm so on arriving home I learn that we still don't have internet, and the power was just restored. Apparently he has decided to call about the offer to have both cable and internet an...

slogan_jim · slogan_jim

Ive shared on this before, but am having a hard time accepting it. I feel like I am the one doing something wrong.Since I have come to al-anon, my attitude has changed for the better regarding who to socialize with. I find myself less insecure, not as argumentative, judgemental, I find I really dont car...

ohcarolina · ohcarolina

In a 3 year relationship with a recovering alcoholic...he is making great strides in his emotional recovery...coming back to Christ and his morals. In the process he has distanced himself from our relationship to get to a place of peace, expresses his love for me, but not sure of our future. I stood b...

andreaj · andreaj

Long time coming.. I suppose Feel very little support from friends but they all have their own ***** I suppose 9 years into watching someone really destroy themselves and watching my own drinking escalate Watching someone's health get worse- begging , pleading, ultimatums - I am sure you have hear...

Confused33 · Confused33

Hi, everyone. I posted some stuff under Amers (something, I can't remember) about 2 months ago. My update is I moved back in with my AH a month ago. We were separated. He got fired, however, and I felt so bad that I wanted to be a support for him. So I moved in and I told him that I will help him through thi...

willowtree · willowtree

I am going to be seeing my parents this weekend and camping with them. I feel so terrible physically because of the stress. I always try and be nice and invite others and now I wish I didn't because my anxiety leading up to it is so bad. I can barely clean my house and my body is hurting all over. I honestl...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am going to make this real quick--a lot of you know that my mom has been sick. She is now in a psychiatric ward. She checked herself in but we had to take her to the hospital in the early morning hours so needless to say, I am exhausted & ready to get healthier myself. It was Saturday morning & I am st...

Ms co-dependent · Ms co-dependent

Well I see threw the fog in my brain I see the slogans that are guiding me threw this crazy disease . I'm not sure how I'm doing it . It's like I'm being lead to the right place . My kids came back from nc 2 weeks ago and ah moved back in with out my invite . Dam that was a tought week for me.i hit every day meeting 3 we...

Ms co-dependent · Ms co-dependent

I'm going to try to say this the right way . I love al Alon I feel getting a little of what I need at this time to stay afloat . My ah spouse see the new healthy ways I been making and sure enough I new he would not like them. He started to make his own Boundarys for me to follow . He not liking it that I'm excited abou...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

It's been a good day so far. I'm putting together my new patio furniture and just stopped to get a bite to eat and something to drink. I check my phone and there is a text from my son. Quote: I have the ranch job...... OK......I don't even want to respond to his text. I think it will just give him hope...

phoenixmagicgirl · phoenixmagicgirl

I had an argument with my AM about her drinking and her denial about it. She was angry because she didn't want to talk about it and I was angry because this disease just robs myself and my family of the woman we used to know... its so painful to watch and experience. To top it off, I took a Statistics class f...

John · John

I wrote not so long ago, how big of a mess I was, and yes, I'm still a mess, just with a different perspective and a lot of gratitude. If my wealth were to be measured by what is in my pockets, I would qualify for the Federal Emergency Management Agency to step in! LMAO But my wealth is not in my pockets, its...

likemyheart · likemyheart

I'm sitting on my porch in a new old rocking chair I bought at one of the many garage sales around town this weekend, big sale weekend because its our one big event for this small town, parade and everything. There's a storm going on in the west, lightening (which makes the fire guys and wheat farmers nerv...

John · John

ANNE Morshead met her husband in a pub. Which is ironic, because alcohol eventually threatened to destroy their relationship."Anyone can become addicted if they drink enough for long enough," Anne told news.com.au. Her husband certainly did."He had a miserable Irish childhood, a father who wa...

LeeMarie · LeeMarie

Hi everyone. I've been going to F2F meetings since January and have yet to share. It's so hard for me because not only is my AH in denial, but I was in denial for more than 20 years. After much therapy and alanon, I've come to the decision of divorce. He would not leave voluntarily so I had to hire a lawy...

Melly1248 · Melly1248

I had a great moment this afternoon. I was on my way to meet my daughter on her way home from school. I ride my bike, my devastatingly handsome dog runs along next to me and says hello to everyone we pass, and people smile and wave and make nice comments ("goodness what a lovely dog!), because he real...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	keeping in touch w/ my sponsor & other alanon friends. (Preview) I just want to say even though it sounds like I might be off my rocker at times, I do speak to my sponsor & Al anon friends almost daily either by text, email or phone. I have been reading Al anon literature daily & some times it even makes sense to me. I am just working on getting some sanity back. FYI...	Hoot Nanny	2	138	Aug 19, 2013 by neshema2
	Words.....how do I say it? (Preview) Hello all...this is my first time posting here..I'm somewhat familiar with forums but this particular one is brand new for me. Al-Anon is not new to me (my ODAT book is dated 1972...haha)....but the season of my life that I find myself in requires a BIG return to Al-Anon principals...lol So, I have re...	cms1122	2	291	Aug 19, 2013 by hotrod
	Well I know it now (Preview) I saw this today and it actually brought up some compassion from me to ME...Yea..I actually said to myself "ok, we didn't know it then... The cruel assessments of me I bought, but no more...I will work my inventory, thank you" I felt a sense of sadness that I didn't see it for all those decade...	neshema2	1	208	Aug 19, 2013 by neshema2
	well *****l...I told a fib (Preview) I said on my post that I was gonna wait to get back in harness (read, and post) , but I saw sooo many "need to read/respond to" posts that I could not resist.. First, I would like to say Welcome to the new comers...U came to the right place... Recovery can be hard..Sad...But nothing worthwhile...	neshema2	6	293	Aug 19, 2013 by neshema2
	Taking a break from MIP (Preview) Hello, everyone. Just wanted to let you all know that I will not be around much. I'll probably come on and check for private messages every so often, though. I have come to realize that I'm not growing. I'm obviously not working my program very well. I'm stuck and I'm choosing to stay there because...	ilovedogs	15	563	Aug 19, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	Normal (Preview) I called my son tonight at our usual time. Haven't talked with him since a few days after his surgery. He was pleasant and watching a pre-season football game. He didn't want to talk with me long. He was happy watching his game. I loved it. I did what I wanted to do. Check in with him. He did what he w...	grateful2be	14	384	Aug 19, 2013 by grateful2be
	Taking the first step.... (Preview) Hello. My name is Stephanie, and my husband is an alcoholic.... thought I would use the old stand by intro! My attempt at levity. We have been married four years. I always knew he drank a lot. I should, of course, have seen the signs. But I ignored them, and my inner voice. He is trying to stay sober now...	Stevens	14	318	Aug 19, 2013 by Stevens
	Stopping in with an eye opening Step 4 discovery (Preview) Hey all just stopping in to update Had a REAL good work w/AA friend/coo-sponsor on my step 4.....I had to go on R&R to do this and feel the pain of yet more Crap to clean up on me....I discovered that (no surprise) that I am still fear based..especially my needs being met and my AA friend and I went over...	neshema2	5	398	Aug 19, 2013 by PP
	Need encouragement to follow my program (Preview) Hi all, I am having trouble with my relationship with my parents who are enablers to my AS. They choose to pay all of his bills and watch his son because he is too hung over to watch him. He is addicted to alcohol and they are addicted to him. I on the other hand try to stay on course with my alanon principl...	debhud	8	336	Aug 18, 2013 by Turris
	Perspectives (cont) (Preview) "Time is constantly passing, one moment following fast upon the other. That's why its so important to press forward boldly,without complaining or fretting. The person who looks to the future and keeps moving ahead is eternally youthful. Such a person's heart is filled with flowers and shin...	Bettina	7	169	Aug 18, 2013 by grateful2be
	What I want vs what I need (Preview) Boy am I a slow learner and a fast forgetter! I have had a couple of humbling lessons in the God of my understanding giving me what I need vs what I want .. that's ok. I'm having a clearer picture that the Pushka plan isn't what it needs to be .. I don't necessarily like it .. I do have to come to accept it's n...	Pushka	8	415	Aug 18, 2013 by Pushka
	sharing my story (Preview) Hi All, I am sharing my story tomorrow in the afternoon of the convention with AA and al anon present. It will be the first time my partner (sober ABF) has heard my story. The theme is hope and sobriety, today we have sobriety in our home life is not perfect but so much better. It is thanks to both fellowsh...	Tracy	5	205	Aug 18, 2013 by pinkchip
	Perspectives (Preview) "True Ease and comfort are not found in a quiet,uneventful life. This may sound paradoxical, but hardships bring about ease and comfort. For only by establising strong individual lives capable of boldly challenging difficult obstacles can we find true Peace and security in this lifetime....	Bettina	1	186	Aug 17, 2013 by hotrod
	Does it ever end? (Preview) I can't take anymore. Do I have to take abuse? What do you do when you work and make too much for help, yet not enough to even pay house and ulities. I have serious health issues too. I'm 3 years from retirement and I have to keep my health insurance? I have faith in God but I have to be realistic too.	wings of a dove	6	421	Aug 17, 2013 by WorkingThroughIt
	Feeling lost and empty! (Preview) It seems the better I get at detaching from my A/A's (daughter and her son), I feel spiritually disconnected from them, I know I still love them, but I mostly feel sadness/fear when I think of them, sad because of their bad choices/circumstances they are in and fear they will try to con/manipulate me in...	Highlyfavored	9	338	Aug 17, 2013 by grateful2be
	lol?? (Preview) This evening- as my AB was getting himself good and drunk in celebration of it being Friday, he mentioned to me that a house we had previously looked at was up for rent again, and that he would like to take another look at it. Then he grew serious and said "I have a concern though. The house has a lot of s...	Melly1248	9	308	Aug 17, 2013 by grateful2be
	Didn't mean to take a break (Preview) Hi all-My life got so hectic and busy and I have felt pressure from work, 90 yr old mom, son and spouse issues, etc., etc., etc. However, I have missed the board and hopefully can get back to checking in as I used to. Each day I couldn't get here I wondered howall wondered how everyone was doing and I wanted t...	Lyne	4	227	Aug 17, 2013 by pinkchip
	Had to laugh.... (Preview) I was at my physical therapy session and had the early good fortune of almost being one on one with my therapist which was cool. She is a young doctor and good at what she does and I was expressing honest gratitude. Over a bit of time others started to come into the place and I went from massage table to e...	Jerry F	6	242	Aug 17, 2013 by Tasha
	Rowing (Preview) I read a story recently- supposedly an AA story so I apologise if you guys have heard it before- but it was the most sensible and compelling reason to throw myself into recovery that I had ever heard. It sparked a change in me. I'll have to paraphrase but hopefully I'll convey the meaning. A woman is lost...	Melly1248	7	463	Aug 17, 2013 by Tasha
	You're welcome... (Preview) I was at an AA open meeting a month or two ago. After the meeting I was talking to a younger member. She said that when she got a few things sorted out in AA she would like to come along to Alanon. I turned to her, and smiled. I said, as far as I was concerned, if you are sober on the day, you are welcome. It is mayb...	DavidG	10	200	Aug 17, 2013 by DavidG
	kids and disappointment (Preview) the exA is at a family cottage on a lake for a week. the 11 yo and 16 yo boys are with him. One of the 11 yo's friends couldn't come with him bc his mom is not comfortable with the exA. When my son left at the beginning of the week, it was okay bc another friend would be able to come visit on thurs. I don't know wha...	rehprof	5	403	Aug 17, 2013 by abbyal
	facing reality head on. (Preview) I am learning to face reality head on especially now that my mom is in the hospital & I am powerless over what happens to her from here. My hands are tied. My husband is her contact person not me. She chose him over me which I am finally getting over after less than a week. I am still at this point not talki...	Hoot Nanny	2	286	Aug 17, 2013 by hotrod
	I , too, am taking a small break from the board.. (Preview) My issues, right now, are not alanon related....Its this financial fear, inability to find more income, depression and fighting off this financial fear.... Sadness and grief and yea, anger how my life could be taken from me and I kick myself for not knowing about alanon, coda till so late in my life...	neshema2	10	490	Aug 16, 2013 by Turris
	True Entertainment with a great message! (Preview)	John	7	560	Aug 16, 2013 by DavidG
	What a craptacular morning. (Preview) <- love this one, it's just perfect for today. What a night/morning. 'Scuse me posting a bit but it's really helping me stay focused to speak this stuff "out loud" and make myself face it. It's all much less confusing and stressful when I share it here because there's a clear path that I ne...	Melly1248	11	566	Aug 16, 2013 by Breakingfree
	1st f2f tomorrow. (Preview) So, first f2f meeting tomorrow at 1pm. I live in an extremely small town. There's one daytime and one night-time meeting per week. What if the people there don't like me? What if there is someone there from my daughter's school? One of the other parents? A teacher? What if someone sees me go in? The dog wo...	Melly1248	15	412	Aug 16, 2013 by Breakingfree
	How to deal with a disruptive mentally ill person during a meeting (Preview) One of the meetings I attend is in the middle of a discussion about how we should deal with a mentally ill person who sometimes talks to herself during a meeting and when she shares she rants about strange things that have happened to her. Any suggestions on how we can solve this problem in a manner consi...	SunnySkies	13	964	Aug 16, 2013 by hotrod
	going back on ultimatums? (Preview) First timer on this forum. I am struggling with going down the same road again. Mom is reporting how good she is doing and asking for "another chance" but the last time I vowed not to deal with this ever again.	big dave	8	523	Aug 15, 2013 by DavidG
	looking back, forward and trying to live in the present (Preview) Hi Everybody: In addition to checking in here for ESH several times a day, I have also been reading posts that I have started to pay attention to the progression of where I was when I came here at the start of 2012, and where I am today.. It has been helpful to see that I started as desperate, angry, bitter r...	yanksfan51	10	350	Aug 15, 2013 by grateful2be
	My father got his 2nd DUI (Preview) Hi everyone, I am typing from my phone. My father texted me to advise that last night he got his second DUI. He didn't go into specifics but my sister, who lives with him, called to tell me. My dad texted me saying 'I **** up and got my 2nd dui. I am going to lose everything.' I am oddly serene about this. Feels...	slogan_jim	23	4287	Aug 15, 2013 by LeenieBeanie
	What is wrong with me? (Preview) Today I'm grateful to be alive and healthy and able to see things in another way. Today I choose to be happy and positive , I accept the fact that my husband is still sick and the fact he states he healthy, it's ok . Not to agree with it. I hold no resentment for Sunday night , if I had to go back and do that night o...	Ms co-dependent	5	428	Aug 15, 2013 by grateful2be
	Doing Better (Preview) Hi All I have worked really really hard on myself this last week or so. Taking care of me the best way I can. I have my ups and downs but reality has set in and I have come to terms with it all. Peace is setting in. Al-anon has been my rock.......and HP my savior. So.......I get another text today from my s...	Cathyinaz	8	233	Aug 15, 2013 by John
	Alcoholic/addict friend with cancer, how do I deal with that? cancer addiction pills friendship feelings alcohol trust boundaries (Preview) I have been friends with this person for roughly six years. She has a history of reckless behavior growing up, which supposedly ended with the birth of her son, but in reality just changed to accommodate him. She has created an identity as a fearless person who never backs down from life (fun), and woul...	simonpopcorn	8	7713	Aug 15, 2013 by maryjane
	Bumper sticker (Preview) I was driving one day with my list of complaints neatly tucked into a brain's compartment to my doctor's office. A driver cut in front of me. On the back of his car bumper a sticker - "Stop Global Whining." By the time I got to the doctor's office and he asked how I was doing, my answer was: &q...	grateful2be	11	351	Aug 14, 2013 by grateful2be
	AH dry but not in recovery (Preview) Hi All, I am new here. I have attended a few online meetings and one F2F meeting last week. My A husband was so angry that I went to a F2F meeting. He doesn't know about the online ones. He has been dry a week. This resulted from an incident in which he drank way too much, embarrassed himself, and embarr...	gingerfizz	16	517	Aug 14, 2013 by Jackie11
	STEP 10 (Preview) http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t54653559/alanon-step-10/-- Edited by hotrod on Wednesday 14th of Augus...	hotrod	2	2429	Aug 14, 2013 by hotrod
	New to this; just left my alcoholic husband (Preview) This has been coming for a while. We have 2 girls 7 and 8. My husband drinks like a fish, and is now mixing pain pills and alcohol. I have been begging and threatening him for a year to get help or we were leaving. I feel like all I have done for the past year is bitch. On my way home from work last Tuesday I call to...	Mom2beans	12	501	Aug 14, 2013 by ParisMemories
	Need some advice on how to support through Step 4 (Preview) Hi everyone. I am a double dipper of both AA and Al Anon and I have completed the 12 steps in AA. My lover and I have been together for 3 years. He has recently gone to Al Anon, gotten a sponsor and begun the 12 steps. His father is in AA, his step father was a rage-a-holic and I am in AA (he is surrounded!). He rec...	recoverylove101	10	676	Aug 14, 2013 by recoverylove101
	Strange phenomenon in Meetings (Preview) today I went to an Alanon open discussion mtg. this one older lady was sort of looking at me, just noticing me I guessed. I'm fairly new to that meeting. she spoke about God and how Alanon is a safe place. She seemed to be a more "senior member". what she said was met with widespread approval. i h...	WorkingThroughIt	21	646	Aug 14, 2013 by John
	Rescuing People (Preview) I developed a pattern of rescuing ppeople at a fairly young age. as I got older my patterns became worse. I began to rescue abusive/unsafe guys. i always want the truth and am looking at this deeper. it believe it has to do with believing I am worthless and saving someone else to create my own self-esteem...	WorkingThroughIt	21	609	Aug 14, 2013 by WorkingThroughIt
	Nice to see you smile (Preview) Is what my AH had to say to me last Friday. He is leaving for a week tomorrow and he thought it would be nice to spend some time together before he goes. I've been praying and pleading that I can get over myself and stop being so miserable. He sometimes will call me a sourpuss and he is right, I am. I don't want...	hisimage	5	321	Aug 14, 2013 by tiredtonite
	consrtant miserable self medicaring depressed husband (Preview) I am trtying so very hard to not cmpletley loose it, he has been so irritable moody miserable - am starting to come to the reallization he suffers from depresson and self mdicates with pot and booze I was awa on holiday with daughter without him for a week - I was looking forward to seeing him only to come...	sandydv	2	318	Aug 14, 2013 by PP
	My son - the wonder (Preview) Tonight was the first time I've spoken with my son since his surgery mid-week. My fears for him included his return to drugs after receiving drugs for the surgery AND I stayed out of it. Let him handle his own stuff with the surgeon he found in ways unknown to me. Kept my mouth shut. Since that day, he h...	grateful2be	9	416	Aug 14, 2013 by xeno59
	Why Being A "Victim" Is Awful (Preview) I realize I'm top-posting a lot today but want to finish off with Solution. I am realizing that my disease (esp the Adult Child stuff) causes me to get very upset easily. I take things personally and am highly sensitive. It is time for me to do another brief inventory. Once a year or so when I feel it build u...	WorkingThroughIt	14	938	Aug 13, 2013 by WorkingThroughIt
	Detachment (Preview) Arriving home from the gym AH is on the phone with the cable company. We lost power and internet last night due to a big storm so on arriving home I learn that we still don't have internet, and the power was just restored. Apparently he has decided to call about the offer to have both cable and internet an...	Jackie11	2	301	Aug 13, 2013 by PP
	I still can't get over this. (Preview) Ive shared on this before, but am having a hard time accepting it. I feel like I am the one doing something wrong.Since I have come to al-anon, my attitude has changed for the better regarding who to socialize with. I find myself less insecure, not as argumentative, judgemental, I find I really dont car...	slogan_jim	6	476	Aug 13, 2013 by abbyal
	Codependent and trying to Overcome (Preview) In a 3 year relationship with a recovering alcoholic...he is making great strides in his emotional recovery...coming back to Christ and his morals. In the process he has distanced himself from our relationship to get to a place of peace, expresses his love for me, but not sure of our future. I stood b...	ohcarolina	4	403	Aug 13, 2013 by ohcarolina
	I just felt unsafe... (Preview) Long time coming.. I suppose Feel very little support from friends but they all have their own ***** I suppose 9 years into watching someone really destroy themselves and watching my own drinking escalate Watching someone's health get worse- begging , pleading, ultimatums - I am sure you have hear...	andreaj	5	374	Aug 13, 2013 by PP
	Help. (Preview) Hi, everyone. I posted some stuff under Amers (something, I can't remember) about 2 months ago. My update is I moved back in with my AH a month ago. We were separated. He got fired, however, and I felt so bad that I wanted to be a support for him. So I moved in and I told him that I will help him through thi...	Confused33	12	441	Aug 13, 2013 by Confused33
	Going to be seeing my family this weekend -need strength (Preview) I am going to be seeing my parents this weekend and camping with them. I feel so terrible physically because of the stress. I always try and be nice and invite others and now I wish I didn't because my anxiety leading up to it is so bad. I can barely clean my house and my body is hurting all over. I honestl...	willowtree	5	329	Aug 13, 2013 by neshema2
	Things can only get better... (Preview) I am going to make this real quick--a lot of you know that my mom has been sick. She is now in a psychiatric ward. She checked herself in but we had to take her to the hospital in the early morning hours so needless to say, I am exhausted & ready to get healthier myself. It was Saturday morning & I am st...	Hoot Nanny	3	150	Aug 13, 2013 by hotrod
	Improving ms co-dependent ðŸ˜„ (Preview) Well I see threw the fog in my brain I see the slogans that are guiding me threw this crazy disease . I'm not sure how I'm doing it . It's like I'm being lead to the right place . My kids came back from nc 2 weeks ago and ah moved back in with out my invite . Dam that was a tought week for me.i hit every day meeting 3 we...	Ms co-dependent	11	427	Aug 13, 2013 by el-cee
	The fog is back (Preview) I'm going to try to say this the right way . I love al Alon I feel getting a little of what I need at this time to stay afloat . My ah spouse see the new healthy ways I been making and sure enough I new he would not like them. He started to make his own Boundarys for me to follow . He not liking it that I'm excited abou...	Ms co-dependent	6	423	Aug 13, 2013 by Aloha
	Text (Preview) It's been a good day so far. I'm putting together my new patio furniture and just stopped to get a bite to eat and something to drink. I check my phone and there is a text from my son. Quote: I have the ranch job...... OK......I don't even want to respond to his text. I think it will just give him hope...	Cathyinaz	16	550	Aug 12, 2013 by WorkingThroughIt
	Argument with my in denial AM and failed my Statistics class (Preview) I had an argument with my AM about her drinking and her denial about it. She was angry because she didn't want to talk about it and I was angry because this disease just robs myself and my family of the woman we used to know... its so painful to watch and experience. To top it off, I took a Statistics class f...	phoenixmagicgirl	9	402	Aug 12, 2013 by Hoot Nanny
	Good Morning, join me for a cup of coffee? (Preview) I wrote not so long ago, how big of a mess I was, and yes, I'm still a mess, just with a different perspective and a lot of gratitude. If my wealth were to be measured by what is in my pockets, I would qualify for the Federal Emergency Management Agency to step in! LMAO But my wealth is not in my pockets, its...	John	7	453	Aug 12, 2013 by Hoot Nanny
	Another Saturday Night (Preview) I'm sitting on my porch in a new old rocking chair I bought at one of the many garage sales around town this weekend, big sale weekend because its our one big event for this small town, parade and everything. There's a storm going on in the west, lightening (which makes the fire guys and wheat farmers nerv...	likemyheart	6	437	Aug 12, 2013 by likemyheart
	Anne M article I found in online newspaper (Preview) ANNE Morshead met her husband in a pub. Which is ironic, because alcohol eventually threatened to destroy their relationship."Anyone can become addicted if they drink enough for long enough," Anne told news.com.au. Her husband certainly did."He had a miserable Irish childhood, a father who wa...	John	17	466	Aug 12, 2013 by grateful2be
	First Time Sharing (Preview) Hi everyone. I've been going to F2F meetings since January and have yet to share. It's so hard for me because not only is my AH in denial, but I was in denial for more than 20 years. After much therapy and alanon, I've come to the decision of divorce. He would not leave voluntarily so I had to hire a lawy...	LeeMarie	8	395	Aug 12, 2013 by Mimi3
	Enjoying freedom. (Preview) I had a great moment this afternoon. I was on my way to meet my daughter on her way home from school. I ride my bike, my devastatingly handsome dog runs along next to me and says hello to everyone we pass, and people smile and wave and make nice comments ("goodness what a lovely dog!), because he real...	Melly1248	8	427	Aug 11, 2013 by likemyheart
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