Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Jen · Jen

I'm having trouble today making a decision. My AH has almost 9 months sober. He is doing great. I am doing great. One problem we keep stumbling over is he won't be proactive about taking care of his vehicle. Now this would not be a problem for me if I had a good vehicle of my own, but I don't. I will asap, but th...

debilyn · debilyn

Aloha's post was such a good one. The responses too. I was hoping we could explore and share or esh (is that the right abbreviation?) some more. I came here not feeling like a co.Never has been my style.As far as my self worth,that was not an issue either. Thankfully I had a life of love and happiness. Anyw...

Loupiness · Loupiness

My 3.5 yr old is perfectly capable of using the potty consistently, but basically doesn't want to. Given all that is going on in our lives, it is on the bottom of my priority list, and in the whole scheme of things, it doesn't matter. He will when he is ready. That said, last night I was getting him ready for...

JenniferN · JenniferN

I can now place myself in the large group of people who have had the privlige to hear a very special woman speak tonight. Her name is Liz Bailey and she is a remarkable woman who's been sober for 56 years. She goes all over North America to speak at AA meetings. If any of you have an opportunity to hear her, TA...

kitty · kitty

I won't be around anymore... . I just wanted to thank everybody for the support & love over the years. love to you all!

Suzannah · Suzannah

What is it about that slogan that, although Al-anon embraces it, it is so hard for some to accept, for others to practice and for some to allow others (like myself to chose) to accept and use and live by? My Sponsor tells me again and again to LET GO and LET GOD and qualifies it as the act of GIVING MY TROUBLES...

maresie · maresie

The place where the A lived last summer is part of the huge fire which is going on in California at the moment. It would normally be totally natural for me to contact him to talk about what is going on there. The people who he lived with (and who I paid rent to) will have lost everything. There is no way they...

Maria123 · Maria123

Friends, It is with a heavy heart that I write this post tonight. Last night, my adopted mom, my very best friend's mom, died after a valiant battle with cancer. We were blessed that she did not suffer very long and died as peacefully as someone with lung cancer does. I was so blessed to have her in my lif...

seekingserenity · seekingserenity

My daughter loves Her father even though he has taken her for granted. I love my mom even though that has never meant much to her. Heather's father and my mother have there own motives and motives. I'm not about to take thier inventories. My daughter wishes her dad would spend more time with her. I wished...

momof3angels · momof3angels

I am just needing to vent...... I am questioning myself as to when is enough enough??? My AH has gotten continually worse with his binge drinking over the past few months. He doesn't drink every day, he usually saves it for the weekend, which turns into a 2-3 day drinking fest. He will disappear "...

maresie · maresie

For some reason today I feel very emotional. I have not heard from my sponsor for a while and my therapy is about to end. Money is huge for me. I have medication which is helping my asthma but no way to pay for it. I am stuck in many ways and in other ways moving forward with lots of options for myself when I had...

seekingserenity · seekingserenity

hey... so last night my daughter and I were watching the American Idol final and when the winner was announced she cried because her guy didn't win. She just didn't understand that the world wasn't going to end....Made me remember that when I was that age how things like that were bigger than life to me...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((((((Family)))))) Hubby has slipped again. We have talked and talked many times about how he can't stay sober by doing it alone. This morning he is seriously thinking about going back to rehab. I think it's a great idea as his head is so far out of the program that it's not working for him anymore. ...

leo · b

Hi all :) I'm an 18 year old girl with a mother whom is an alcoholic (or an A as you seem to call it on here) and I find it hard as we have a terrible relationship due to her lying all the time and bringing my little brother up poorly etc etc etc and i find it really stressful to manage looking after my brother, the...

glad lee · glad lee

Dear Family, This weekend, I am driving 2 states away to go to my niece's wedding. I have been looking forward to this...it feels like a vacation, a change in routine...my chance to see my family since my divorce was final in March. My children, ages 22 and 23 will be joining me. While their dad (my e...

Aloha · Aloha

In no way am I officially on step number 10 (still plugging away at step one with my sponsor), but I feel each of the twelve steps applies to our lives and should be applied when the time is right, regardless if we've officially "worked" the steps before it or not. I don't want to skip and hop all...

cookie1971 · cookie1971

((((((Family))))) Today we found out that they caught the guy who caused the motorcycle accident that killed my SIL's friends and injured her brothers wifes sister and her husband. He is being charged with 2 counts of operating while intoxicated causing death punishable by up to 15 years, and 2 cou...

Carlene46 · Carlene46

My husband is very prominant and an alcoholic. Is there a chat room for families of alcoholics ? I need someone to talk to.

Jerry F · Jerry F

Aloha Family!! Just a note that Jerry F and his spouse will be out of town and at Ruby's house checking her out for the next week seeing if we size up with her. Can't really spoil her however her Mom and Dad can be proxies. Would like to say that I'll be staying in contact and don't think that there's much of...

charr · charr

My ah has a friend (an A) that is in real bad shape, Whiskey in the morning and so on, knows it all. Anyway he told my ah that he doesn't want to mow his lawn or plant sweet corn or cut wood this year. This is deeply bothering my husband. This friend is 61 and is very bloated, whiskey and beer all day long since iv...

Diva · Diva

Somebody's knockin' Should I let him in? Lord it's the devil Would you look at him I've heard about him But I never dreamed He'd have blue eyes and blue jeans; Somebody's talkin' He's whispering to me Your place or my place Well, which will it be? I'm getting weaker And he's coming on strong But I don't wan...

ddub · ddub

Learning to feel feelings can be really hard especially if you have been raised where you are told not to get angry, don't upset others etc so I am aware but confused. I am angry and in the past, I would blame it on an imaginary person called "george" or something for those times it didn't s...

Jean4444 · Jean4444

I met with an attorney today that I really like. She is very very expensive, though ($450/hour). After I told her my story and she told me her spiel I said to her: I just got done with grad school and am actively seeking work but do not have a job yet. I am really worried about your bill. She said she would acce...

wildthang86 · wildthang86

Ok so I start my day off with a Joyce Meyer's broadcast and then go to the Alanon meeting online. I have my agenda of things to do already set up, so after meeting I start to work on them. Good for me, right? So I have to contact my AH, or do I? Well I wanted to update him on the dryer, which needs repair work done....

cookie1971 · cookie1971

((((Family))) We got some terrible news. Two young couples from my sister in laws church were involved in a terrible motorcycle accident yesterday. One couple was killed instantly, and the other couple was seriously injured both husband and wife each losing a limb. The two couples had just purchas...

Aloha · Aloha

I'm definitely starting to recognize "the signs" more and more when my AH has been drinking. And it's weird, the differences between his dry spells and his non-dry spells aren't so very different, but there are subtle differences. If that makes any sense at all. Last night I c...

maresie · maresie

I think my life with the A was pretty much either bleak or at the beginning when he really played into seducing me, pretty nicely, (bascially he couldnt' do enough for me for a few weeks and that was the end of that, after that over time he couldnt do anything for me ever unless I begged him until I was exhaus...

Suzannah · Suzannah

I don't know whether this is something that comes of age, however I feel that I have experienced a wonderfully satisfying and completeness of being this very moment. Just looking around me, I have come to realise that I have everything I need, and there is nothing that I want other than to continue in th...

seekingserenity · seekingserenity

hey y'all... so this weekend my family of origin is gathering for a graduation party. I was invited but I have chosen not to go out of self preservation. eel like I'm strong enough yet to deal with a couple family members, my mom and her sister, who are very dysfunctional. Anyway, I feel some sadness th...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

What does it mean when I feel like I don't have anything to say anymore? I have a vision in my mind of the preacher smacking me on the forehead and saying you're healed... LOL

laurab · laurab

I often think what would my life be like if my A Son was not an A. I definately am an enabler. I have cleaned up after my H screwed things up with money, businesses, and all kinds of stuff. I have lied for him, lived hand to mouth with 4 kids while he was so special, he wouldn't run his business from home in a way t...

Aloha · Aloha

This has been sort of an ongoing disagreement I've been seeing occurring between my sponsor and a couple other Al-Anon members whom I respect, as well, in my Al-Anon meetings. One member who is also a sponsor says us Al-Anoners have the disease of alcoholism just as much as the A's in our lives d...

maresie · maresie

I had no idea that part of my obsessional stuff with the A was about trying to control and influence the uncontrollable. I met a man recently who I had some common interests with. He was pretty dogmatic about what he wanted out of the "relationship". I was open and listened and then at some po...

RLC · RLC

Well I have had several post on MIP, over the last month or so, but never a topic. I will give you a little backgroung. My active AW does not work (last 5 yrs) for the reason most of you here can guess. That is not a problem. She goes to at least 6 to 8 AA meetings a week ( last 3 yrs). I know she tries. But she...

amybear · amybear

I really let myself down the other night... sort of... I had planned to attend my first f2f the other night and then chickened out... Sort of a failure in that regard, but I chose to participate in an online meeting here instead... I knew I needed some ESH but I guess I just wasn't ready for it to be the f2f ki...

JenniferN · JenniferN

Being a cashier for about 15 years, my opinion about the general public isn't very flattering. Being a cashier in the "Bible Belt of the South" can be very surprising at times. And last night I had a nice surprise from a gentleman that had just came from some sort of religous service. I said m...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

14 tons of spilled Oreo cookies snarl Ill. traffic Mon May 19, 9:00 AM ET MORRIS, Ill. - Police say a trailer loaded with 14 tons of double-stuffed Oreos has overturned, spilling the cookies still in their plastic sleeves into the median and roadway. Illinois State Police Sgt. Brian Mahoney says the t...

wildthang86 · wildthang86

My AH and I are seperated, not legally or anything like that but living apart. I have communicated with him on several occassions, through text messaging. I thought that would be alright, a lot of control over whether or not to talk or not. But I keep finding myself falling into chats with him where I res...

Loupiness · Loupiness

I am really beginning to see how my past and my present are connected and must mesh together for me to be able to then sort it all out and start to heal. I had a relatively peaceful day, cleaning out my "office" and sorting, organizing and shredding. Then I came across a coloring book that I hav...

wildthang86 · wildthang86

For those of you keeping up with the "saga", I had to tell my 18 year old to leave the house. I had laid down rules for him to go by in order to stay here, one of which he COULD NOT use my car and had to find his own way to school, work and friends, etc.. Well this morning he came to me and wanted to use my c...

CJ098 · CJ098

Hi all, Thank you so much for everyone's posts to my last entry. I'm having a really hard time with my feelings since my AH moved out. I feel happy, not depressed that he's gone. Yet everyone in my life is constantly asking me how I'm doing and worried I'll take him back. I don't understand why everyon...

wildthang86 · wildthang86

Yes, my AH is mad at me for the way I had him removed from our home. He says because the way I was so sneaky about it and why didn't I just talk to him about things. He knows the program of AA and I don't think he is real familiar with Alanon but I just told him that I was scared to tell him because he was either drunk...

charr · charr

It is true, my ah is an a. I never wanted to admit it. for 20 years he has never really showed Huge signs of this disease. (maybe i didn't want to see them) They are coming out full force now, (his choice) I am understanding (i think) the progression of Aism, And where he is taking himself. As i am reading the...

Jean4444 · Jean4444

I gotta get this out, thanks for listening. I am getting divorced. Just really sad about all the hope and dreams so far gone, so distorted, such a useless waste of energy, etc. So sad, just a lot of tears. I know it will pass. I know it is grief. I know HP is holding me close. I just am having a lot of uncomfor...

glad · glad

The beer companies paint pictures of "hot" young girls, beautiful "rocky mountains" a room full of "friends" etc. Are all these supposed to represent what drinking will "bring' you. What would our ad campains look like?? I always had a picture of cars crashe...

cookie1971 · cookie1971

(((((Family))))) As many of you know, I recently got a new supervisor, and I was very upset because she was my former partner, and we had some very bad feelings between us while she was at my store. As a result of all of these problems she was moved to another store. I was really afraid that things woul...

debilyn · debilyn

Ok,some of you know I live in a bunkhouse on the end of my barn. I use a toilet you put bags in..... gross, but functional. BUT guess what!!! I sold my FannieAlice to be a breeder to a very nice knowledgeable PLUMBER!! I asked him if he would trade putting a toilet in here for me. He quickly said no problem!!!...

glad · glad

Regarding last post: Hope you guys don't get sick of my "drama" but.... I just realized I need to be thankful, I tried to set boundries, he got offended And he told me so: that is an emotion, He told me about an emotion!!! He told me it made him feel like he was being treated like a baby. He used the...

JenniferN · JenniferN

Reality: working in a gas station as a cashier for $7/hr instead of in the field I spent the last year in school for Dream world: Perfect job, perfect boss, perfect peers Reality: Not being able to take care of my kids because I can't even take care of myself right now Dream World: Having the faculites to c...

glad · glad

The proof is in the end result. The proof is in the way we live our lives. The road to poverty with us is paved with good intentions, for us. We contantly struggle with being out of cash due to paying todays expenses with money that is due tomorrow. He was uspset with me for messing up a good night last nigh...

tma0413 · tma0413

Well the A was sentenced today for his DUI/snowmobile in January. Huge fine...and 10 days in jail/work release. He is to start serving his time next Friday. While it kills me to think that he will be away from the family for 10 (8) days, I am trying to think positive....at least it is ONLY 8 days. But...

canadianguy · canadianguy

Two recent stories have popped up on the news in recent days, and they both sure smack of "alcoholism"..... In Australia, a man was pulled over by police, and he had a 24-pack of beer snugly fastened in the seatbelt, while his 5-year old boy was sitting on the floor of the vehicle, NOT buckled...

Aloha · Aloha

I've been finding my AH is deciding to be suspicious of me every now and then. A few weeks ago, he got upset at me for coming home late after an Al-Anon meeting - I turn my cell off during the meetings and then right after the meeting, I often find I'm talking with other members for a while and often don't ge...

Suzannah · Suzannah

The more I read others here, the more I realise I was so uneducated and so gullible and so naive. I know I cannot go back, o that I could my mind says on irrational days, and I would not want to, however I am so so naive, or rather I was. The things I did wrong; they make me cringe. I fell for all the A's insanity an...

acjmom · acjmom

Hello All, I have been reading more of the posts on here and maybe Im not having such a great understanding of the way somethings are....I have been working very hard on step one and the issue of control...some days are better than others but I am still trying....but one thing that keeps popping in...

Jorbax · Jorbax

I am not dealing with things very well today to be honest..........I am wondering what you guys think about this: I let my 58 yr old A. brother move in with us (thought he was at rock bottom & ready for change) He is here and has already lost a job nearby due to drinking/ fighting (he is a belligerent d...

ddub · ddub

When I was in denial, the rules kept changing based on whether AH was drunk or not. Trying to keep everything going smoothly was impossible because the rules changed. At the time, I had negative thoughts that I wasn't trying hard enough, I was just not smart enough or I always messed things up. The u...

Loupiness · Loupiness

I initially looked forward to posting about what I great day I had. I got off work early, stopped to make an appt for a haircut and was able to get one immediately, and then bought an outfit for a event I am going to this weekend. I even got a local discount, and my pants are being hemmed for free. While shoppi...

Tenderheartsks · Tenderheartsks

Several weeks ago my brother called me to see if I wanted his 'old' laptop as he was getting a new one. He has a sound studio at his home where he does radio commercials for businesses all over the country as a side business. He's also the creative director for TIC-FM in Hartford, CT, and also does the late a...

nmike · nmike

When do you know if you are really letting go? Or are you just stuffing it? I saw my Ahsober a few times this week. I have to prepare myself ahead of time because he comes, speaks to me about "the weather" type of things and then he is gone. I ask myself have I let go because I turn on my heel and walk h...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	struggling with vehicles and boundaries. (Preview) I'm having trouble today making a decision. My AH has almost 9 months sober. He is doing great. I am doing great. One problem we keep stumbling over is he won't be proactive about taking care of his vehicle. Now this would not be a problem for me if I had a good vehicle of my own, but I don't. I will asap, but th...	Jen	4	342	May 25, 2008 by Jen
	How does or did addiction of another affect you? (Preview) Aloha's post was such a good one. The responses too. I was hoping we could explore and share or esh (is that the right abbreviation?) some more. I came here not feeling like a co.Never has been my style.As far as my self worth,that was not an issue either. Thankfully I had a life of love and happiness. Anyw...	debilyn	4	592	May 25, 2008 by wildthang86
	Acceptance & Superheroes (Preview) My 3.5 yr old is perfectly capable of using the potty consistently, but basically doesn't want to. Given all that is going on in our lives, it is on the bottom of my priority list, and in the whole scheme of things, it doesn't matter. He will when he is ready. That said, last night I was getting him ready for...	Loupiness	3	350	May 25, 2008 by Peggy7
	Opportunity of a Lifetime (Preview) I can now place myself in the large group of people who have had the privlige to hear a very special woman speak tonight. Her name is Liz Bailey and she is a remarkable woman who's been sober for 56 years. She goes all over North America to speak at AA meetings. If any of you have an opportunity to hear her, TA...	JenniferN	2	393	May 25, 2008 by Jill
	too far gone, hopeless (Preview) I won't be around anymore... . I just wanted to thank everybody for the support & love over the years. love to you all!	kitty	10	579	May 24, 2008 by kitty
	Let Go, Let God... (Preview) What is it about that slogan that, although Al-anon embraces it, it is so hard for some to accept, for others to practice and for some to allow others (like myself to chose) to accept and use and live by? My Sponsor tells me again and again to LET GO and LET GOD and qualifies it as the act of GIVING MY TROUBLES...	Suzannah	21	944	May 24, 2008 by Suzannah
	not contacting the A no matter what. (Preview) The place where the A lived last summer is part of the huge fire which is going on in California at the moment. It would normally be totally natural for me to contact him to talk about what is going on there. The people who he lived with (and who I paid rent to) will have lost everything. There is no way they...	maresie	2	434	May 23, 2008 by nmike
	my adopted "mom" and my HP (Preview) Friends, It is with a heavy heart that I write this post tonight. Last night, my adopted mom, my very best friend's mom, died after a valiant battle with cancer. We were blessed that she did not suffer very long and died as peacefully as someone with lung cancer does. I was so blessed to have her in my lif...	Maria123	19	657	May 23, 2008 by norwood
	intersections (Preview) My daughter loves Her father even though he has taken her for granted. I love my mom even though that has never meant much to her. Heather's father and my mother have there own motives and motives. I'm not about to take thier inventories. My daughter wishes her dad would spend more time with her. I wished...	seekingserenity	1	250	May 23, 2008 by norwood
	When is it enough? (Preview) I am just needing to vent...... I am questioning myself as to when is enough enough??? My AH has gotten continually worse with his binge drinking over the past few months. He doesn't drink every day, he usually saves it for the weekend, which turns into a 2-3 day drinking fest. He will disappear "...	momof3angels	7	395	May 23, 2008 by wildthang86
	Sad, angry lonely in total HALT (mentions Rescue) (Preview) For some reason today I feel very emotional. I have not heard from my sponsor for a while and my therapy is about to end. Money is huge for me. I have medication which is helping my asthma but no way to pay for it. I am stuck in many ways and in other ways moving forward with lots of options for myself when I had...	maresie	3	523	May 23, 2008 by maire rua
	the innocence of a child (Preview) hey... so last night my daughter and I were watching the American Idol final and when the winner was announced she cried because her guy didn't win. She just didn't understand that the world wasn't going to end....Made me remember that when I was that age how things like that were bigger than life to me...	seekingserenity	3	502	May 23, 2008 by barisax
	Prayers for rehab. (Preview) (((((((Family)))))) Hubby has slipped again. We have talked and talked many times about how he can't stay sober by doing it alone. This morning he is seriously thinking about going back to rehab. I think it's a great idea as his head is so far out of the program that it's not working for him anymore. ...	Karilynn	17	519	May 23, 2008 by leo
	Hello I'm new :) (Preview) Hi all :) I'm an 18 year old girl with a mother whom is an alcoholic (or an A as you seem to call it on here) and I find it hard as we have a terrible relationship due to her lying all the time and bringing my little brother up poorly etc etc etc and i find it really stressful to manage looking after my brother, the...	b	6	521	May 23, 2008 by leo
	Family wedding boundaries (Preview) Dear Family, This weekend, I am driving 2 states away to go to my niece's wedding. I have been looking forward to this...it feels like a vacation, a change in routine...my chance to see my family since my divorce was final in March. My children, ages 22 and 23 will be joining me. While their dad (my e...	glad lee	7	353	May 23, 2008 by Jen
	...and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it. (Preview) In no way am I officially on step number 10 (still plugging away at step one with my sponsor), but I feel each of the twelve steps applies to our lives and should be applied when the time is right, regardless if we've officially "worked" the steps before it or not. I don't want to skip and hop all...	Aloha	3	987	May 23, 2008 by cookie1971
	MORE NEWS ABOUT ACCIDENT (Preview) ((((((Family))))) Today we found out that they caught the guy who caused the motorcycle accident that killed my SIL's friends and injured her brothers wifes sister and her husband. He is being charged with 2 counts of operating while intoxicated causing death punishable by up to 15 years, and 2 cou...	cookie1971	6	360	May 22, 2008 by cookie1971
	Need a chat room (Preview) My husband is very prominant and an alcoholic. Is there a chat room for families of alcoholics ? I need someone to talk to.	Carlene46	2	299	May 22, 2008 by rtexas
	Just a note.... (Preview) Aloha Family!! Just a note that Jerry F and his spouse will be out of town and at Ruby's house checking her out for the next week seeing if we size up with her. Can't really spoil her however her Mom and Dad can be proxies. Would like to say that I'll be staying in contact and don't think that there's much of...	Jerry F	11	417	May 22, 2008 by Loupiness
	My AH and his AFriend Question (Preview) My ah has a friend (an A) that is in real bad shape, Whiskey in the morning and so on, knows it all. Anyway he told my ah that he doesn't want to mow his lawn or plant sweet corn or cut wood this year. This is deeply bothering my husband. This friend is 61 and is very bloated, whiskey and beer all day long since iv...	charr	4	548	May 21, 2008 by Christy
	This is Bad, Bad Bill...... (Preview) Somebody's knockin' Should I let him in? Lord it's the devil Would you look at him I've heard about him But I never dreamed He'd have blue eyes and blue jeans; Somebody's talkin' He's whispering to me Your place or my place Well, which will it be? I'm getting weaker And he's coming on strong But I don't wan...	Diva	7	647	May 21, 2008 by Jill
	anger, martyr or self pity? (Preview) Learning to feel feelings can be really hard especially if you have been raised where you are told not to get angry, don't upset others etc so I am aware but confused. I am angry and in the past, I would blame it on an imaginary person called "george" or something for those times it didn't s...	ddub	9	740	May 21, 2008 by maresie
	HP blessed me today (Preview) I met with an attorney today that I really like. She is very very expensive, though ($450/hour). After I told her my story and she told me her spiel I said to her: I just got done with grad school and am actively seeking work but do not have a job yet. I am really worried about your bill. She said she would acce...	Jean4444	5	428	May 21, 2008 by maresie
	Just need to vent... (Preview) Ok so I start my day off with a Joyce Meyer's broadcast and then go to the Alanon meeting online. I have my agenda of things to do already set up, so after meeting I start to work on them. Good for me, right? So I have to contact my AH, or do I? Well I wanted to update him on the dryer, which needs repair work done....	wildthang86	3	353	May 21, 2008 by maresie
	Prayers Requested (Preview) ((((Family))) We got some terrible news. Two young couples from my sister in laws church were involved in a terrible motorcycle accident yesterday. One couple was killed instantly, and the other couple was seriously injured both husband and wife each losing a limb. The two couples had just purchas...	cookie1971	7	307	May 21, 2008 by Leetle
	Open eyes (Preview) I'm definitely starting to recognize "the signs" more and more when my AH has been drinking. And it's weird, the differences between his dry spells and his non-dry spells aren't so very different, but there are subtle differences. If that makes any sense at all. Last night I c...	Aloha	3	430	May 21, 2008 by Loupiness
	shades of grey rather than black and white (Preview) I think my life with the A was pretty much either bleak or at the beginning when he really played into seducing me, pretty nicely, (bascially he couldnt' do enough for me for a few weeks and that was the end of that, after that over time he couldnt do anything for me ever unless I begged him until I was exhaus...	maresie	3	592	May 21, 2008 by wildthang86
	Counting my blessings (Preview) I don't know whether this is something that comes of age, however I feel that I have experienced a wonderfully satisfying and completeness of being this very moment. Just looking around me, I have come to realise that I have everything I need, and there is nothing that I want other than to continue in th...	Suzannah	7	421	May 20, 2008 by Maria123
	a tinge (Preview) hey y'all... so this weekend my family of origin is gathering for a graduation party. I was invited but I have chosen not to go out of self preservation. eel like I'm strong enough yet to deal with a couple family members, my mom and her sister, who are very dysfunctional. Anyway, I feel some sadness th...	seekingserenity	3	284	May 20, 2008 by cookie1971
	What does it mean? (Preview) What does it mean when I feel like I don't have anything to say anymore? I have a vision in my mind of the preacher smacking me on the forehead and saying you're healed... LOL	carolinagirl	5	420	May 20, 2008 by Loupiness
	Did I need to live in crazyland? (Preview) I often think what would my life be like if my A Son was not an A. I definately am an enabler. I have cleaned up after my H screwed things up with money, businesses, and all kinds of stuff. I have lied for him, lived hand to mouth with 4 kids while he was so special, he wouldn't run his business from home in a way t...	laurab	2	364	May 20, 2008 by maresie
	The disease of alcoholism - do we have it, too? (Preview) This has been sort of an ongoing disagreement I've been seeing occurring between my sponsor and a couple other Al-Anon members whom I respect, as well, in my Al-Anon meetings. One member who is also a sponsor says us Al-Anoners have the disease of alcoholism just as much as the A's in our lives d...	Aloha	12	2681	May 20, 2008 by Diva
	really commiting to the three C's (Preview) I had no idea that part of my obsessional stuff with the A was about trying to control and influence the uncontrollable. I met a man recently who I had some common interests with. He was pretty dogmatic about what he wanted out of the "relationship". I was open and listened and then at some po...	maresie	5	369	May 20, 2008 by maresie
	My First Topic Posted (Preview) Well I have had several post on MIP, over the last month or so, but never a topic. I will give you a little backgroung. My active AW does not work (last 5 yrs) for the reason most of you here can guess. That is not a problem. She goes to at least 6 to 8 AA meetings a week ( last 3 yrs). I know she tries. But she...	RLC	4	498	May 20, 2008 by Jerry F
	Working up your courage... for your first f2f (Preview) I really let myself down the other night... sort of... I had planned to attend my first f2f the other night and then chickened out... Sort of a failure in that regard, but I chose to participate in an online meeting here instead... I knew I needed some ESH but I guess I just wasn't ready for it to be the f2f ki...	amybear	9	598	May 20, 2008 by canadianguy
	Surprising People (Preview) Being a cashier for about 15 years, my opinion about the general public isn't very flattering. Being a cashier in the "Bible Belt of the South" can be very surprising at times. And last night I had a nice surprise from a gentleman that had just came from some sort of religous service. I said m...	JenniferN	2	241	May 20, 2008 by debilyn
	Of all the times to NOT have milk! (Preview) 14 tons of spilled Oreo cookies snarl Ill. traffic Mon May 19, 9:00 AM ET MORRIS, Ill. - Police say a trailer loaded with 14 tons of double-stuffed Oreos has overturned, spilling the cookies still in their plastic sleeves into the median and roadway. Illinois State Police Sgt. Brian Mahoney says the t...	Tiger2006	3	440	May 19, 2008 by cookie1971
	Do I want an AH or ex-husband? (Preview) My AH and I are seperated, not legally or anything like that but living apart. I have communicated with him on several occassions, through text messaging. I thought that would be alright, a lot of control over whether or not to talk or not. But I keep finding myself falling into chats with him where I res...	wildthang86	5	637	May 19, 2008 by amybear
	me and Raggedy Ann (Preview) I am really beginning to see how my past and my present are connected and must mesh together for me to be able to then sort it all out and start to heal. I had a relatively peaceful day, cleaning out my "office" and sorting, organizing and shredding. Then I came across a coloring book that I hav...	Loupiness	6	375	May 19, 2008 by Jean4444
	Starting to question my abilities to cope... (Preview) For those of you keeping up with the "saga", I had to tell my 18 year old to leave the house. I had laid down rules for him to go by in order to stay here, one of which he COULD NOT use my car and had to find his own way to school, work and friends, etc.. Well this morning he came to me and wanted to use my c...	wildthang86	14	725	May 19, 2008 by maresie
	A's love to make you feel guilty (Preview) Hi all, Thank you so much for everyone's posts to my last entry. I'm having a really hard time with my feelings since my AH moved out. I feel happy, not depressed that he's gone. Yet everyone in my life is constantly asking me how I'm doing and worried I'll take him back. I don't understand why everyon...	CJ098	8	1186	May 19, 2008 by maresie
	My AH is mad at me....boohoo!! I love me more and more each day (Preview) Yes, my AH is mad at me for the way I had him removed from our home. He says because the way I was so sneaky about it and why didn't I just talk to him about things. He knows the program of AA and I don't think he is real familiar with Alanon but I just told him that I was scared to tell him because he was either drunk...	wildthang86	4	668	May 19, 2008 by maresie
	My awakening (Preview) It is true, my ah is an a. I never wanted to admit it. for 20 years he has never really showed Huge signs of this disease. (maybe i didn't want to see them) They are coming out full force now, (his choice) I am understanding (i think) the progression of Aism, And where he is taking himself. As i am reading the...	charr	4	540	May 19, 2008 by maresie
	so sad (Preview) I gotta get this out, thanks for listening. I am getting divorced. Just really sad about all the hope and dreams so far gone, so distorted, such a useless waste of energy, etc. So sad, just a lot of tears. I know it will pass. I know it is grief. I know HP is holding me close. I just am having a lot of uncomfor...	Jean4444	16	476	May 19, 2008 by maresie
	What would your advertisement look like?? (Preview) The beer companies paint pictures of "hot" young girls, beautiful "rocky mountains" a room full of "friends" etc. Are all these supposed to represent what drinking will "bring' you. What would our ad campains look like?? I always had a picture of cars crashe...	glad	6	622	May 19, 2008 by Tiger2006
	GOOD NEWS!! (Preview) (((((Family))))) As many of you know, I recently got a new supervisor, and I was very upset because she was my former partner, and we had some very bad feelings between us while she was at my store. As a result of all of these problems she was moved to another store. I was really afraid that things woul...	cookie1971	4	285	May 19, 2008 by Tiger2006
	I got dumped on.....by HP (Preview) Ok,some of you know I live in a bunkhouse on the end of my barn. I use a toilet you put bags in..... gross, but functional. BUT guess what!!! I sold my FannieAlice to be a breeder to a very nice knowledgeable PLUMBER!! I asked him if he would trade putting a toilet in here for me. He quickly said no problem!!!...	debilyn	8	643	May 18, 2008 by cookie1971
	Blessed and almost missed it!!!! (Preview) Regarding last post: Hope you guys don't get sick of my "drama" but.... I just realized I need to be thankful, I tried to set boundries, he got offended And he told me so: that is an emotion, He told me about an emotion!!! He told me it made him feel like he was being treated like a baby. He used the...	glad	2	389	May 18, 2008 by Maria123
	Reality Stinks (Preview) Reality: working in a gas station as a cashier for $7/hr instead of in the field I spent the last year in school for Dream world: Perfect job, perfect boss, perfect peers Reality: Not being able to take care of my kids because I can't even take care of myself right now Dream World: Having the faculites to c...	JenniferN	4	454	May 18, 2008 by glad
	The proof is in the way we live our lives! (Preview) The proof is in the end result. The proof is in the way we live our lives. The road to poverty with us is paved with good intentions, for us. We contantly struggle with being out of cash due to paying todays expenses with money that is due tomorrow. He was uspset with me for messing up a good night last nigh...	glad	1	653	May 18, 2008 by nmike
	What happens from here.... (Preview) Well the A was sentenced today for his DUI/snowmobile in January. Huge fine...and 10 days in jail/work release. He is to start serving his time next Friday. While it kills me to think that he will be away from the family for 10 (8) days, I am trying to think positive....at least it is ONLY 8 days. But...	tma0413	4	432	May 18, 2008 by tma0413
	Stories that make you roll your eyes....... (Preview) Two recent stories have popped up on the news in recent days, and they both sure smack of "alcoholism"..... In Australia, a man was pulled over by police, and he had a 24-pack of beer snugly fastened in the seatbelt, while his 5-year old boy was sitting on the floor of the vehicle, NOT buckled...	canadianguy	4	721	May 18, 2008 by Jerry F
	Suspicious A's (Preview) I've been finding my AH is deciding to be suspicious of me every now and then. A few weeks ago, he got upset at me for coming home late after an Al-Anon meeting - I turn my cell off during the meetings and then right after the meeting, I often find I'm talking with other members for a while and often don't ge...	Aloha	5	465	May 17, 2008 by wildthang86
	What a fool I have been... (Preview) The more I read others here, the more I realise I was so uneducated and so gullible and so naive. I know I cannot go back, o that I could my mind says on irrational days, and I would not want to, however I am so so naive, or rather I was. The things I did wrong; they make me cringe. I fell for all the A's insanity an...	Suzannah	10	643	May 16, 2008 by maresie
	Wondering about different things (Preview) Hello All, I have been reading more of the posts on here and maybe Im not having such a great understanding of the way somethings are....I have been working very hard on step one and the issue of control...some days are better than others but I am still trying....but one thing that keeps popping in...	acjmom	4	358	May 16, 2008 by canadianguy
	I need help/advice AND online sponsor (Preview) I am not dealing with things very well today to be honest..........I am wondering what you guys think about this: I let my 58 yr old A. brother move in with us (thought he was at rock bottom & ready for change) He is here and has already lost a job nearby due to drinking/ fighting (he is a belligerent d...	Jorbax	2	1261	May 16, 2008 by maresie
	Rejoice? (Preview) When I was in denial, the rules kept changing based on whether AH was drunk or not. Trying to keep everything going smoothly was impossible because the rules changed. At the time, I had negative thoughts that I wasn't trying hard enough, I was just not smart enough or I always messed things up. The u...	ddub	1	290	May 16, 2008 by nmike
	from good to bad (Preview) I initially looked forward to posting about what I great day I had. I got off work early, stopped to make an appt for a haircut and was able to get one immediately, and then bought an outfit for a event I am going to this weekend. I even got a local discount, and my pants are being hemmed for free. While shoppi...	Loupiness	3	374	May 16, 2008 by Jean4444
	I have the best brother in the world! (Preview) Several weeks ago my brother called me to see if I wanted his 'old' laptop as he was getting a new one. He has a sound studio at his home where he does radio commercials for businesses all over the country as a side business. He's also the creative director for TIC-FM in Hartford, CT, and also does the late a...	Tenderheartsks	5	894	May 16, 2008 by lmw
	Is this letting go? (Preview) When do you know if you are really letting go? Or are you just stuffing it? I saw my Ahsober a few times this week. I have to prepare myself ahead of time because he comes, speaks to me about "the weather" type of things and then he is gone. I ask myself have I let go because I turn on my heel and walk h...	nmike	1	582	May 15, 2008 by Jerry F
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.