|
|
Thank you all for your inspiration - I am back on track
(Preview)
Thanks so much to everyone that responded to my post from yesterday titled something like 'how many times can your heart break'. I needed perspective, I needed support, and you gave it to me. Last night I went home after work to a quiet, peaceful house with my two sweet baby dogs, and I thought about...
|
Iris lover of dogs
|
2
|
301
|
|
|
|
Husband in rehab
(Preview)
This is so hard for me to talk about. My husband will come home from rehab after sixty days, next week. I'm happy to have him come home but I'm so afraid of my own behavior . I am so used to letting my emotions reflect how he feels. If he was sad I felt sad, if he was angry etc, so was I. How hard it is to detach. He is...
|
Timid
|
7
|
506
|
|
|
|
Finally
(Preview)
Just got home from my face to face meeting. I finally had the opprotunity and the nerve to ask the person I wanted to be my sponser. I just feel like I've made a huge step in recovery and it feels great. Just wanted to share.
|
Bead
|
5
|
301
|
|
|
|
Newbie with Alcoholic Pot Smoking Husband
(Preview)
I've been married for 13 years and have 3 and 5 year old little girls. My husband is a binge drinker and a pot smoker. He has been in a 12 step program since July 2011 when I found out he drove drunk with our daughters in the car and told him I'd reached the end of my rope. I knew he was going to continue with this b...
|
living for me
|
7
|
6898
|
|
|
|
how to move on
(Preview)
Please help me. Been in the program for three months and I can barely hold on. I don't know how to move on. I just keep getting hit with one crisis after another which I have no control over. I doubt Gods plan for me is working. My father is dying and I don't know how much more I can take. I have no one to turn to. M...
|
nola
|
8
|
627
|
|
|
|
Pig Pen went out last night!
(Preview)
Had a very good meeting with my counselor...which I so needed. It seems he wants me to acknowledge my anger....and respond in appropriate ways. Anger is a signal that people have crossed a boundary...but once I feel angry...right on its heels is SHAME for being angry. Nice girls aren't angry. You all...
|
rehprof
|
6
|
641
|
|
|
|
No More Catepillar
(Preview)
Where to begin. This is my first time here looking for guidance and strength. I grew up with an addict & alcoholic parents. My personal life has been a mess forever. Now in my 40's I'm here trying to fix me, my thinking and behaviors. I've only had 2 serious relationships with men, both were active a...
|
IWannaFly
|
6
|
572
|
|
|
|
Expectations that lead to resentments, DUH!
(Preview)
You'd think that I know by now to NOT set any expectations from my AH. Yet, lately I feel so desperate for attention that I find myself falling into my codie trap all over again. So, for Easter I got him a nice card. I wrote a heartfelt note saying that spring is for renewal and that I was thanking God for g...
|
ilovedogs
|
6
|
588
|
|
|
|
Love as a shield
(Preview)
This was something that came up in a discussion I was having today after a meeting. I'm curious to hear what you all think of this .. love as a shield .. How do I get there? Does anyone practice this concept? What does it mean to you? Whatever ESH regarding love as a shield (both for outward to the world a...
|
Pushka
|
10
|
502
|
|
|
|
Apology
(Preview)
I posted a comment just a few minutes ago that was inappropriate. I have no excuse. I deleted the comment and I hope I didn't offend anyone other than the moderator who brought it to my attention.
|
Wolfie55
|
1
|
450
|
|
|
|
He is possibly getting out of jail and I am NERVOUS!!
(Preview)
so im kind of nervous. It has been over 3 months since I let my crack addict ex-boyfriend go. Heard through the grapevine he could be getting out this Friday. I have slowly growing and working on my happiness and it all was because I put him out of sight and out of mind. I am nervous and I am nervous and anxio...
|
Julie3310
|
4
|
453
|
|
|
|
Happy Easter - Holidays Alone
(Preview)
Another post talks some about being alone on holidays and I wanted to address the issue in a new topic. I have to say, that for the past year I have enjoyed every holiday because I've been able to relax and truly enjoy them, taking them back and making them for me again. No more making it all about him and wha...
|
likemyheart
|
9
|
500
|
|
|
|
detachment
(Preview)
i have been attending f2f meetings and I realize that my AS is too dependent on me. I know this is how I contributed to his addition. I am going out of town for a few days and he is worried about his transportation as he can not drive and we live miles from town, he is stressed about making it to work. he is livi...
|
nothopeless
|
2
|
311
|
|
|
|
Fear
(Preview)
I know fear is something that is ruling my emotions these days. I sometimes see fear as an inability to trust God, yet I also see it as a means of protection for my soul. As negative an emotion that fear is, I do believe that it has it's place. It's giving me the confidence to believe that things will work...
|
ilovedogs
|
15
|
2628
|
|
|
|
Sharing
(Preview)
I'm back home again. I arrived home to a beautiful front yard, flowers in the house and a peaceful environment. I don't know what the future holds but I know I'm right where I'm supposed to be. I've also complicated the relationship between my AH and my family. My parents have always been where I went whe...
|
Jackie11
|
9
|
526
|
|
|
|
My recovery program/acceptance
(Preview)
I have been doing really well and been feeling so strong, my acceptance has been great. Than last night I was lonesome and needed someone to hold me. I went over to my exAH's and it was nice and he was sweet. I however wish I could get my fulfillment some other way by someone else. I have not let anyone else in...
|
Breakingfree
|
7
|
577
|
|
|
|
bittersweet day!
(Preview)
Yesterday I got some of the insurance money that my dad left us. It was a good thing & of course a sad thing. The check even said on the attachment that they were sending comfort or something at the time of our loss. It was quite a big check for me to receive because I haven't had that kind of money to spend...
|
Hoot Nanny
|
3
|
310
|
|
|
|
Nar-Anon
(Preview)
We have good meetings in my area. Their website is nar-anon.org.
|
MaryODAT
|
0
|
283
|
|
|
|
stress & anxiety!
(Preview)
I am struggling with stress & anxiety so much that I am angry and misunderstanding what people are doing and saying to me! I am forgetful and so tired. I haven't even been doing my regular exercising. I was burning the candle at both ends and finally got sick-physically. I hope I can get back on tr...
|
Hoot Nanny
|
3
|
1096
|
|
|
|
My Inventory
(Preview)
I let myself be drawn into the extreme chaos of my AH's detox. I stopped focusing on my recovery. I took back my will and my HP slapped me across the face with it reminding me I need to surrender. I made things worse by being drawn into the control of things I have no control over. No human power will remove my...
|
Very Very Tired
|
12
|
561
|
|
|
|
Letting go of obligations.
(Preview)
I grew up in a home where my parents absolutely felt obligated to attention, drama and whatever crumbs of energy I have. So as a result I've always been prey to others who have a sense of entitlement. In the last year I was approached by someone who used to live next door to me. He dumped his ex girlfriend b...
|
orchidlover
|
10
|
610
|
|
|
|
Choosing a sponsor questions
(Preview)
I'm ready to start my 4th step and am looking around for a sponsor. I've gotten comfortable at one particular weekly meeting, and have just started going to others as I can. I'm not sure how to shop around for a sponsor. I feel hesitant to walk up to a stranger after a meeting and just ask. I know this is...
|
Dolly Llama
|
7
|
666
|
|
|
|
UGH, lawyers
(Preview)
Please share your opinions on how you feel about this. There's a part of me that wonders if my AH is trying to find ways to drink again and there's a part of me that believes he is just thinking of ways to minimize the frustration of the ignition interlock device. I posted this on another forum and most of...
|
ilovedogs
|
6
|
527
|
|
|
|
Wife not allowing me attend meeting
(Preview)
Hi all - i've attended a couple of al-anon meetings and find them incredibly helpful. i would probably go nightly if i could! currently, my wife is not supporting my intention to begin attending a late-evening meeting (8:15 start). i could leave the house right around when our youngsters are asleep...
|
KDglen
|
5
|
780
|
|
|
|
My alcoholic parents are moving in.
(Preview)
My father has owned his own painting business for 15 years. With the downturn of the economy he has lost all of his customers. My mother worked with him. So they are both jobless and are being evicted from their trailer. They were only a year away from having the trailer paid for. They've already been thr...
|
StargazerLily
|
10
|
664
|
|
|
|
Al ATeen Meetings - Questions
(Preview)
I'm looking at the Al ATeen Meetings in my area, there is a great one nearby and a night I can take my oldest without his younger brother (together at a meeting is a BAD idea, I'll find a separate meeting for middle son Mondays). All kinds of notes. If it says "Al Anon meeting in another room" do...
|
AStrongerMe
|
4
|
338
|
|
|
|
Boundaries are working
(Preview)
Hi All, I'm a bit new, so Hi everyone. love the site and find myself coming back every couple of days. I'm engaged to an alcoholic. I've been in denial for 2 years, and interestingly enough, once we got engaged and my life got busy with grad school his drinking picked up significantly. For the past 3 mo...
|
Sunshine daydream
|
6
|
582
|
|
|
|
Prayers for a safe trip
(Preview)
My mom is coming to town and I'm very excited, a little nervous and just very excited. We had such a great visit the last time I'm hoping we have a similar experience. The kids are excited. She will be here for 10 days. My hormones are in check woo hoo .. lol .. God is good .. I was a little worried about tha...
|
Pushka
|
8
|
2282
|
|
|
|
I think I'm doing the right thing
(Preview)
Hi all, It's been awhile but I seem to be in need of some emotional support. The Sunday before Valentines Day my AH went overboard again and took off, this time he came back in the middle of the night in a rage. I was sleeping and was woken by the bedroom light being flicked on and the pillow being yanked from...
|
michellelong
|
9
|
546
|
|
|
|
Irony
(Preview)
I have to write here because any attempt to communicate with my ex is wasted energy and time.
He took our kids to counseling appt. Counselor tells him "your kids have an issue with self, they think everything is about them, they don't see the big picture or how they affect others".
Ex rel...
|
AStrongerMe
|
5
|
507
|
|
|
|
Do I stay?
(Preview)
My fiancé has been sober for over a year. The last time he drank was when I was gone overnight. Well I had my best friends bachelorette party on Saturday and I return Sunday to a drunk. Of course he becomes extremely angry, blaming everyone but himself saying awful things. It is very ugly. Everything fro...
|
srn2
|
13
|
597
|
|
|
|
Tonights Meeting
(Preview)
Hi I feel so bad, when I said I would facilitate Tues meetings, I forgot my first Tues of the month obligation:(( Please, anyone jump in and have meeting for me. Thanks and Sincere apologies.
|
Grace7
|
0
|
281
|
|
|
|
I wanna post but what do I say?
(Preview)
I guess there isn't much to say today. I am doing very well! I have been blessed w/ a somewhat sound mind. I am doing what is that is in front of me. My ah is still sober. He is having a hard time w/ money issues. But then don't we all! He is just so serious about money that sometimes it takes away from the serenit...
|
Hoot Nanny
|
2
|
489
|
|
|
|
In a good place
(Preview)
I no longer walk around expecting rugs to be pulled out from under me. Most of the time its my "stories" the rest of the time, I see the rug before it happens, if I'm honest with myself.
I made myself a priority in the middle of 2010. I began to take care of me. I thought for certain my kids would...
|
AStrongerMe
|
6
|
410
|
|
|
|
Patterns that repeat
(Preview)
I've had a week where I've had to set some boundaries with several friends. Two of them have been standing me up when we've agreed to meet. It's not that they're mad or anything, they're just flaky. With another, we get together and then while I'm talking (never while she's talking!), she gets out her...
|
Mattie
|
8
|
449
|
|
|
|
Leaving again...
(Preview)
I have plans on leaving this week. My AH is sick with lupus and in denial about his alcoholism. We've been married 35 years and I have been sober and in AA for 7 years. I simply want whats Good, Right and REAL!!! Pray that my decision to turn my will and my life over to God sticks this time.
|
Laura Baker
|
5
|
444
|
|
|
|
Many thanks to you all
(Preview)
Thank you all so very much for your kind words, compassion, and prayers. I went back to work today (no bereavement leave at my temp job, and if Mama doesn't make money, we can't pay all our bills), and hung in there for six hours. Arrived home to a mailbox filled with a motion filed by my ex-husband's hor...
|
stephaniej
|
5
|
532
|
|
|
|
What should I do to help daughter ?
(Preview)
Hi what is the best thing to do to help my daughter. She is a functioning alcoholic. Holds down a good job but drinks every day bottle of wine and 4 cans if not more. She every now and then says 'Thats it I'm cutting down / giving up'. If I say anything I get told to mind my own business. I don't want to fall out wi...
|
Notwaving
|
7
|
471
|
|
|
|
trust & confidentiality
(Preview)
Can I be trusted? these days I feel I can but there were times when I felt I couldn't be trusted at all! I have to deal w/ a lot of situations where I have to keep what I see & hear to myself. I sometimes really don't like this at all. I have to though. In the real world where I live, I have to be trusted. I can't...
|
Hoot Nanny
|
2
|
362
|
|
|
|
Finally made my Sat morning Al-anon meeting and
(Preview)
it was great. I have been not making it a priority since I can come here numerous times a day and keep myself focused on my program. I went 5 days without internet, because my provider is having issues and I was so glad I went to my home group this morning. A couple old timers told me how important it was to the...
|
Breakingfree
|
3
|
406
|
|
|
|
The last straw...and maybe rock bottom?
(Preview)
Today, the unthinkable happened. I'm not sure where to start. There's a long, 4 year history of what has been happening and why, with my mother and alcohol, but I don't know if I have energy to go through it right now... Regardless, don't judge her off of this...she's a wonderful person. I love my mother...
|
Shelliebear
|
8
|
608
|
|
|
|
over responsibility
(Preview)
I am a member of al anon and coda. I have been affected by others drinking but btoday I know i am sick too and have really been looking at me in coda. I do service in all the meetings i attend. then someone asked who would take over the al anon side of a small convention so I stepped forward. Then the opportun...
|
Tracy
|
2
|
260
|
|
|
|
Detox
(Preview)
It is an experience I don't wish on my worst enemy. It is ugly. I won't tell war stories other than to say: everything I had read about what it is like to watch a loved one going through detox has been accurate. I am so grateful for my program and for my HP guiding me when I haven't had a clue what to do. My progr...
|
Very Very Tired
|
6
|
550
|
|
|
|
Do I have to quit too...?
(Preview)
Greetings... It's been awhile since I've posted, things are better... Ummmm...however...recent events have made it a problem now that I still drink! I am all for someone getting their **** together...but WHY should I have to change something that is not a problem for me??? Nothing more to say......
|
bandit714
|
14
|
758
|
|
|
|
AH Admits He's Doing Nothing to Teach Me a Lesson
(Preview)
So, one of my girlfriends was here for the weekend. She and I have known each other forever and spent much of the day Saturday catching up and sharing about the challenges and joys in our lives. That night, I went to bed a bit early and she and my AH talked...nothing funny, just talked. She called me toda...
|
hicktownmom
|
4
|
511
|
|
|
|
Husband checked out of rehab after 30 minutes
(Preview)
Hi everyone, I'm so glad this board is here. I need to vent and also to listen to wise and similar experiences. My husband has been an alcoholic for years. I have known about this for a long time and there have been various failed attempts on his part to control his drinking, be abstinent for short periods...
|
sarah1979
|
5
|
645
|
|
|
|
MONDAY AM AL-ANON MTG - APRIL 2, 2012
(Preview)
I am unable to chair the meeting this morning, April 2, as I have an appointment with my doctor. Hopefully someone will step up and chair in my absence. Thanks
|
shimo
|
0
|
262
|
|
|
|
That scary day when they get their license back
(Preview)
Following the DUI, its probably a scary day when they get their license back. I am just waiting on her to go buy some rum. See, her poison is Mount Gay Rum. History: post-DUI, she asked if she could start drinking again. I said it was up to her. She tried, it was a vomiting disaster. Then, again, she ask...
|
GeneralLee
|
6
|
391
|
|
|
|
Need support
(Preview)
Hi, I could really do with some support at the moment. It's a day for taking care of me. Tracey
|
Tracey C
|
6
|
232
|
|
|
|
Missing the Person They Used to Be
(Preview)
Yesterday I got to see and talk to the man that I married. It was the first time I have seen him in over a year. The alcohol was out of his system after a VERY rough detox. He looked so good and was the same caring person that I remember. I dropped him off at an inpatient rehab facility last night and it was on...
|
WornOutMrsFixIt
|
8
|
619
|
|
|
|
update
(Preview)
Just checking in to let y'all know what's going on with me. A good friend left the country recently for three months. I am taking care of his dog while he is gone. I asked him before he left if I could take care of his house too. He gladly agreed. It's been about a week and a half now and I'm loving the peace and t...
|
pineapple
|
5
|
324
|
|
|
|
Non-AA Member dating AA member
(Preview)
I recently started seeing someone who is 5 Months sober - I am not a memeber is AA. We see each other about once a week - Dinner, movie, bowling etc. He moved her months ago and put himself into treatment and currently lives in a sober house. He attends meetings 3+ times a week and meets with his sponsers. C...
|
MusicFan
|
4
|
1183
|
|
|
|
Sadness
(Preview)
I know I have shared bits and pieces with the group about my mom, who has been in very poor health for many years, and totally bedridden for the last year. Although she never suffered from alcoholism or drug addiction, she had many hallmarks of a classic addict, and I have been able to use my Al Anon tools...
|
stephaniej
|
12
|
438
|
|
|
|
And life keeps happening ;)
(Preview)
hello all, seems that while I am steady trying to regain my footing life keeps happening...As I've shared my daughter surrendered on March 2 and began detoxing/recovering fom a significant stint with heroin..Thank you God for this 24 hrs...went to visit Sun and attended a family meeting that was am...
|
Carla042
|
8
|
2851
|
|
|
|
Just happened/I'm reeling. Daughter (via email) "disowned me" forbids communication
(Preview)
Two days ago I got a VERY unexpected an horrible email from my daugter. She forbad all communication with her or her family for good. "emails will not be opened, messages will be deleted without listening, if you come to the house you will be met with silence, don't contact the children, don't ta...
|
Karen S
|
10
|
3738
|
|
|
|
What to Say to my H
(Preview)
Ive been having a tough time this week. My AH, from whom Im separated, drank himself insane last summer, went to rehab for 3 weeks, then lost his job. Hes been sober since, for 7 months. Since then, he has been going to AA regularly, has a good sponsor, and appears to be working the program to some exten...
|
nyc018
|
7
|
496
|
|
|
|
The Price is Right...REALLY?
(Preview)
So last night my son tells me all about the COOLEST thing. My exA and his sister are planning a trip to vegas to be on the game show. It's so cool because they have special shirts, and they are going to drive and visit relatives along the way and BLAH BLAH BLAH Oh, do I sound angry? Yah. Probably because I am. I...
|
rehprof
|
12
|
510
|
|
|
|
His False Recovery Is Over...He Was Drunk Last Night
(Preview)
I didn't see him drink at all so he was obviously trying to hide it from me, but we had guests over for my birthday and my friends all noticed how drunk he was. Just so disheartened. I knew that he would probably slip since he hasn't chosen to head into a treatment plan at all, but I guess the reality was hard...
|
hicktownmom
|
6
|
482
|
|
|
|
Searching for help...
(Preview)
I feel so lost & confused. I have been dealing with my AH (that stands for husband right?) For over three years now. Last night, after having gotten so drunk he blacked out, hit his head on the stairs and laid unconcious for who knows how long, choice to get drunk and verbally tear me to shreds, thr...
|
motherof4
|
9
|
551
|
|
|
|
Another hard day.
(Preview)
I'm finally coming to the realization, as difficult as it is, that my marriage is not good for me and that I have to remove myself from it. I've never had to grieve over anything like this before. My therapist explained the grieving process to me and it honestly sounds impossible. The idea o...
|
Mlkiss75
|
9
|
537
|
|