The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
It is an experience I don't wish on my worst enemy. It is ugly.
I won't tell war stories other than to say: everything I had read about what it is like to watch a loved one going through detox has been accurate.
I am so grateful for my program and for my HP guiding me when I haven't had a clue what to do. My program has helped me detach and still love the human being who is beneath all the layers of alcohol. The detox process is a very undignified event. I am grateful that I can see there is a human being with dignity beneath the disease.
When I took my wedding vows 20 years ago and said I would love my AH for better or worse, I had no idea what the "or worse" part would be like.
I have not been just sitting at the hospital and watching. I am living, going to F2F meetings, calling my sponsor, taking care of myself and the kids, and offering support to family members who don't have a program yet. The short time I do visit my AH and the contact I have with the medical staff who is treating him... Wow, it's ugly. I have a whole new respect for the medical staff and the police who don't get paid enough to deal with things like this.
-- Edited by Very Very Tired on Sunday 1st of April 2012 11:10:00 AM
You were on my mind today in the AM. As ugly as it is .. I'm glad he is where he needs to be with trained staff and not doing this on his own. I'm so glad you have such an amazing program!!!
Hugs P :)
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Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
You hit it on the head when you describe it as an undignified event. I will never forget what I saw last summer when my AH hit what we all hope was his bottom. It was the complete disintegration of sanity and dignity. I will say that with sustained abstinence and a program of recovery the sanity starts to return. I am glad you are taking care of yourself and working your program. Wishing you lots of strength. This too shall pass.
I'm so thankful that he is with trained professionals who know how to help him detox.
My husband came close to death when he tried to detox on his own. It scared him so much that he remembers it vividly and never wants to experience it again.
It takes what it takes to get sober. Everyone is different. The "botom" that is.
Good for you for taking care of what is under your control. You're handing this situation beautifully.
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You have to go through the darkness to truly know the light. Lama Surya Das
Resentment is like taking poison & waiting for the other person to die. Malachy McCourt
Prayers and positive vibes for you and your family...
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Only to the extent that we expose ourselves over and over to annihilation can that which is indestructible be found in us. -from Pema Chödron's When Things Fall Apart