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Rockbottom....?
(Preview)
I guess rock bottom means something different to everyone, my AD has no job, no money, no car and blames me for everything wrong is her life and yet I was her #1 Enabler. She doesn't see she has a problem with alcohol it's everyone else that has a problem @@ I'm just slap worn out.... -- Edited by AngelicH...
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AngelicH57
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3
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233
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Tired of Feeling Used by the Martyr's...
(Preview)
Hey all... Have you ever come to a place where the Blinders Come off and you realize that all you will Ever be to some people is Used while they play the Martyr of Every Situation... Woo Is Me! My Poor Life! My Poor Past! My Poor everything! I have been sitting in this for a while now, and I have been Examining...
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Jozie
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1
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243
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Denial
(Preview)
Good Morning everyone Working on the 4th step I found that enabling was easy to stop, undertand why I did it and was able to get a handle on it. But denial I can't get a grip on. I work and work at it and my head is in the clouds. All I can do is pray about it and practice, practice practice Take care PS: I fin...
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Cathyinaz
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6
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557
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how insidious the disease is.
(Preview)
I stepped back from my, "getting divorced from the A wife manfriend." I didn't know what made me at the time. It hit me though, he has been so codependant, and was slipping right back into it. He is so sick and so blinded by her disease. I started feeling sick, frustrated, angery. Then re...
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Debilyn
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3
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333
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feeling blue today
(Preview)
My soberAH and I live together but we are more like roommates than a couple. I am still living here cuz im paying off some debts and I should be out by April. I work two jobs and I sleep on couch. These past 3 weekends he hasnt slept at home. Last night he texted me a whole bunch of stuff saying that he hated me an...
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texasgal
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2
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235
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What a mess
(Preview)
So once again my fiance dissapeared this morning. She swore she wasnt using or doing anything innapropriate, but I didnt believe her and accused her of using. She told me many times that she wasnt doing anything wrong and I didnt believe her. She decided to leave tonight and its killing me. Im worri...
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Lupo
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3
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389
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difficulty with stepboard
(Preview)
Hi-I need and want to work the steps. I used the same name and password for the step board as I do for this one. It let me leave a post on step one a few days ago, but now it won't let me! I tried setting up a new acct. and it said my email address was the same, which of course, it is. Can anyone help? Thanks so m...
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Lyne
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1
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182
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Left Father, Need Advice
(Preview)
This is my first post - I have been encouraged by my mother to come to this board. I've never been more ready to get the help I deserve which is why I'm posting today. My mom has recently left my father who is an alcoholic. My mother is living in her own apartment and my dad is living by himself in the house w...
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wimeraw
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6
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267
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why do I love him??
(Preview)
I know my soberAH is cheating. He has mentally abused me for years. When he was an active drinker he would physically abuse me. Right now im in a situation where I am staying these next two months to pay off my remainding debts so that I can afford my own apt. We dont sleep together. But I do love him and idk wh...
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texasgal
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9
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515
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Searching for Information on the new CAL book on e-book called "Having had a Spiritual Awakening..."
(Preview)
Someone here, David maybe? Posted information on the first Conferance Approved Al-Anon e-book out, "Having had a Spiritual Awakening..." Rather than search through all the posts, I thought I'd just post this as a "topic", because I think it was written in as a "comment...
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Overcome
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2
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313
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Seeking advise
(Preview)
Where to begin,I'm going to try and keep this short, I could write a book if I wanted but I'll give the cliff notes so you get the idea. My wife is what I call a weekend alcoholic. She only drinks one night a week either Friday or Saturday. Every once and a while a weeknight will get thrown in the mix but not oft...
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JD2112
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4
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386
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sick 14 year old GD FINALLY able to verbalize pain of alcoholism with her father.
(Preview)
my dear granddaughter is finally able to talk about the pain of living with an alcoholic parent. unfortunately it took her hospitalization to feel safe enough to be able to verbalize her feelings. feeling of fear while dad was drinking daily. listening to mom and dad fight. listening to and pro...
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debhud
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5
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445
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Peaceful and grateful in the midst of chaos
(Preview)
Dear friends I've been so consumed with the out of control behavior of my husband lately, but at this moment I am feeling so grateful and peaceful, I have to share that positive news. I am so grateful for all your support, encouragement and honesty. You have helped me get through the past days and weeks...
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ParisMemories
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6
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377
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My denial
(Preview)
You know, not one damn thing is going to change with my son. I just talked to him and he's only worried about selling that car to get money. I know he will pay rent for a few months and drink the rest away. 6 months from now he will be in worse shape. I'm sick of this thinking I go.... I'm told over and over not...
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Cathyinaz
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6
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275
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Online Meetings
(Preview)
There seems to be a huge prejudice with online meetings. I know al-anon recommends f2f meetings as the best for various reasons. The fact though is not everyone can access f2f meetings for various reasons though eg geographical, transportation, health. One fellow I chatted with couldn't venture o...
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Tracey C
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5
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216
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When will I learn?!
(Preview)
I just spent an hour going to the hospital my A was in and and hour coming back because he has checked himself out and I didn't know. His caseworker called me Thursday saying he was at the hospital because he told some police officers he was going to shoot them so they'd kill him (he doesn't have a gun). H...
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Fool4You
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1
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265
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Not my business ..
(Preview)
WOW .. that one is a hard one for me to really get a handle on at the moment. The past two weeks has taught me a LOT about myself. Some of it is good stuff and then some not so good, I would say as a whole more positive than negative at this point. I have a much stronger program than I thought, .. I also cause mys...
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Pushka
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3
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528
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11 th Step
(Preview)
thoughts?http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t52905175/step-11-alanon/
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hotrod
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0
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214
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TGIF
(Preview)
Well today was very busy at work so I'm glad the weekend is here. The rain and hail was quite strong, a little crazy getting home. Now the sun is out and the storm is over. Just received a email from my son and he also had a good day. He went on a interview for a job and as he says basically hired. Part IT work a...
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Cathyinaz
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7
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450
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Getting medical help
(Preview)
I believe my husband is in the end stages of his alcoholism. He's worked 2 weeks in the last 15 months and lost his job because they thought he had a seizure and sent him home. He has no recall of that. They required him to go to a neurologist (who told him to stop drinking) and to inpatient rehab, where he...
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Terry57
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2
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256
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What does AH mean?
(Preview)
I'm going to try and make a joke before I vent. Does AH mean alcoholic husband or asshole? My husband was in a iop program, and he stopped going. I probably had something to do with his leaving since I questioned some of the treatment center's procedures. Sometimes I think I am an enabler. So now h...
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DebLisa55
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3
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3736
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sometimes I have to go w/ quick wit!
(Preview)
Sometimes I feel that the best things I say come from quick wit! I say funny things to get through tough moments. I have bipolar disorder & sometimes out of mania, I say some pretty profound things: at least I think so. I have the abiltiy to make people laugh. Sometimes I think comedians are mentally...
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Hoot Nanny
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1
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220
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AH Left and Said He is Afraid He Might Hurt Himself
(Preview)
His outpatient program ended at 3PM today. He came home at 4:30, smelling of alcohol. He packed up some stuff and headed for the door. I said please don't leave. He said he can't stay here with me. He said he has to leave, and he is afraid he will hurt himself. This morning before he left for the program, he s...
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ParisMemories
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13
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375
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"Inception" and my struggle
(Preview)
If you've seen the movie "Inception" this will make sense, if not, it's a great movie and you should see it. ;) **spoiler below!!**
I feel like Leonardo D.'s character and AH is his wife. I feel so spun out living in reality when his reality (drug-induced) is so false to me. He was clean for l...
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Number30
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2
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311
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windy night
(Preview)
its blowing a gale in my part of the world tonight and my son is out there somewhere. fear creeps into my mind and my body reacts. i become a bit paralysed. sounds dramatic but i can stay frozen for hours when it takes hold. ive just watched a program(while beng frozen) that may have been sent from my hp. all...
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el-cee
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7
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204
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AS asked for my help. Need ESH PLEASE
(Preview)
i am a nurse and have worked in detox in the past. today while visiting AS he asked me if he could come to my house for a few days so i could help him detox safely. (he has no medical insurance.) i used to work in this type of unit and i know what is involved. he does have medications needed to get him through...
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debhud
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6
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252
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go w/ the flow!
(Preview)
I am finding it easier when I go w/ the flow. Accept the things I cannot change, etc. But today I am feeling a little sad because my cousin in CA hasn't emailed me in awhile. I asked her for her phone number & I guess it was too many times. I am such a pushy cousin I guess. Anyhow, if she doesn't email me soon...
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Hoot Nanny
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1
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193
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Trying to remain calm
(Preview)
I am so stressed out today. My AH's domestic violence case is scheduled for trial. He refuses to hire any attorney. He says I need to fix this. I know that sounds crazy, but part of me, a big part of me, does feel responsible. I honestly knew that he was not violent. The reason I called the police that day was...
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ParisMemories
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4
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394
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uncomfortable feeling: detachment or indifference?
(Preview)
Hello Family, I'm actually back to myself, and my life more or less in balance... there is lots to do still, and there will always be, but at least I have my peace back.... without that i couldn't walk so steady. So yesterday again my ex ABF contacted me, with a small text saying 'how are you?'.... I didn'...
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tortuga
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7
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619
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A 17th Century Prayer...
(Preview)
Hello All, This week I am doing a mamoth painting and decorating job. Its going ok but since I'm feeling a bit tired I thought I'd take a few minutes to enjoy my MIP family and reading the posts I was reminded of a little card that I carry in my wallet. Perhaps it is worth a share.... A 17th Century Nun's Pra...
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milkwood
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5
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552
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Thank you HP
(Preview)
Have to share something with you my dear MIP family...hopefully it will offer strength and hope to those who are hurting. I've never been one who is good with confrontations - especially when they are unexpected. So when I got a call earlier this evening from my STBXAH from rehab, I knew something was u...
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blondie99
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4
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207
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One Day at a Time
(Preview)
When my heart and mind were filled with discouragement, there was no room for concern for others. Daily I tormented myself, thinking in circles, deciding first on one desperate measure, then another. There was no air, no breathing space, between me and my problem; we were entangled and confused. I...
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Cathyinaz
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2
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188
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Al-Anon's First e-book!
(Preview)
For all you e-book fans!! New from Al Anon: Our first e-book! Having Had a Spiritual Awakening . . . This beautiful book features member sharings, photographs, and artwork from around the globe, reflecting the diversity of Al Anon members' spiritual experiences. No longer in print,Havi...
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david62
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5
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660
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Friends, things took a turn
(Preview)
Well, at least my mentality took a turn, that's for sure. We had marriage counseling yesterday, it didn't go well. I need someone to tell me to NOT listen to his insanity. He says I don't care about the house anymore and that right there was insane: I have planted new shrubs, I clean, I vacuum, I take ca...
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ilovedogs
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6
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422
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My A Son re-arrested!
(Preview)
As I had mentioned rather recently, my son, a 33 yr old A got busted for breaking into a little store and stealing cigarettes and beer. He was charged with two felonies as a result. His bond was 10,000.00. This was on Dec. 1st. I let his ass sit in jail for about 2 weeks and then put up the 1,000.00 it cost...
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John
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11
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510
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New here and upset tonight
(Preview)
Hi, am new here and need to get things off my chest to people who understand and don't judge. 2 months ago my brother in law died - he was an alcholic living with his mum so we had a long hard road with her enabling him. My sister is also an alcholic since young. She went into a detox unit before Christmas and ha...
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Sandiedog
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9
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317
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Too helpful wife
(Preview)
My wife of seven years is a recovering addict. About 3 months ago she started helping a male member of our church who is fresh out of recovery. He hasn't gotten a sponsor. He hasn't made 90 meetings in 90 days. He relapsed once already. He slept with a girl a week after he got out of rehab and thought he had he...
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Jbrobers
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4
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389
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New member - taking first steps
(Preview)
Hey everyone. I guess a little background first. My husband is a high-functioning alcoholic, and battles depression and anxiety as well. He's on medication for the latter two, and has been working on the alcohol. We've been together for 13 years, and looking back I realize that he suffered for a l...
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SpiderArcana
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4
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306
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Is this denial
(Preview)
Little message from my son. I emailed him about his choices in life, working at getting things together and told him I'm praying for him and that I loved him: Response: I am trying on all fronts. Some guy came to look at the car last night and seems very interesred. I also rejected an offer for 7. My anxiet...
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Cathyinaz
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10
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283
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Left a voicemail w/ probation officer
(Preview)
I have no idea if I should do this or not. But I am so incredibly ticked off everyday all day at my AH for his meanness, his whining, his helplessness, his drug use, his excuses, his laziness, his false accusations, his unwillingness to BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING. I left a message for his probation officer t...
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NicoleDiver
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18
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599
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With every lie
(Preview)
With every lie, the last one was about something so small, but with each one no matter how big or small, I just move further and further away emotionally. And my A seems to be in her own world of denial. She blames me for being distant, and doesn't see her behavior as anything problematic. I guess the wo...
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Lyne
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3
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232
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Withdrawal from The A
(Preview)
I have been separated from my AH for about out a month now. I finally got to the point where I was truly happy and saw a new future for myself, when my AH asked me to join him for family night at his rehab center. I went for a few reasons. First I was shocked and flattered that he invited me after shutting me o...
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imom
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3
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356
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A Letter to ABF
(Preview)
Hello out there everyone, I guess I'll start out by admitting that I haven't been working the steps on the boards, as faithfully as I'd intended. What's that saying about the road to hell being paved with good intentions (lol)? This past weekend, ABF surprised me by saying that he wanted to stop drinki...
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Raven Juniper
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6
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349
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it doesn't work sometimes
(Preview)
I just got the new tablet on Saturday as I mentioned earlier this week. Sometimes I get frustrated. It is new to me--I guess it will take time to get used to it. I love to look around & see what it available on it. Unfortunately I still have to get on the library computer to do other things. I have gotten u...
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Hoot Nanny
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1
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186
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help me. I am riddled with stress right now over what my partner is out doing!
(Preview)
Sad. I have been to more than 6 meetings, and have " How Al-anon works" sitting next to me tonight. I felt like I was doing so well, and I remember a time when my partner saying he would even go to AA would have been God shining down right in front of me. I couldn't imagine that day and felt like when...
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giraffe13
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7
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484
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does anyone know?
(Preview)
Does anyone know how to access MIP on a tablet? I haven't got that far yet. I just got it on Sat. I am still going to be on here on the library computer. I feel much more comfortable knowing that I can get on here w/o any trouble. I am doing OK. God is still blessing me. I am going to be able to keep in touch much bet...
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Hoot Nanny
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2
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240
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Am I being fair to my AH?
(Preview)
Recently I have been feeling convicted in my heart that I am being unfair to AH when it comes to sex. I have not been interested in him sexually for quite some time. I have been at a point where I the lies, the drinking, the DUI, the angry mean things he says, etc(you all get the picture) have taken a toll on...
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ilovedogs
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6
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278
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Alcoholism
(Preview)
al·co·hol·ism/alkhôlizm/ NounAn addiction to the consumption of alcoholic liquor or the mental illness and compulsive behavior resulting from alcohol dependency. Synonyms dipsomania - inebriety So who named this devil created addiction a disease?
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cnh502
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4
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260
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He Has Been In Recovery for 5 days and he is WORSE!
(Preview)
Hello all, I googled 'how to deal with a recovering alcoholic' and here you fine folks are! I have never considered Al-Anon, not sure why. Nonetheless, here I am. My husband has been in recovery 5 days, I use the word recovery loosely. Let me give you some brief history: In the recent past I have been rev...
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cnh502
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16
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359
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I went backward !!!
(Preview)
I have done well... living by hes gonna drink or not drink what are you gonna do... He has left last few wkends to be drunk at fishing camp, course txting horrible things to me, Ive learned not to answer calls and txts for that matter for the most part. I helped my daughter move in her 1st house she just bough...
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sweeetr
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6
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209
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HP has spoken
(Preview)
I had a dream recently, actually a nightmare. I dreamt of my ABF (ex now) with all the abuse, lies, drinking, pain and chaos warped in one place. In the dream i begged for help from the police and friends (lost friends when i choose to stay with him, that's real) but no one would help because i keep putting u...
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Heather 68
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2
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178
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Today, 12 years ago....
(Preview)
This morning I woke up and sat in front of my laptop, read a few post on this and a few other MIP message boards, and was pretty much run over with memories of years gone by. I sat right here, 12 years ago today (2001), and wrote a letter to the NC Board of Social Workers and the NC State Attorney General, and co...
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John
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8
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445
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Feeling how?
(Preview)
Rough couple of days here. My ABF got stink drunk, called to tell me he met a women at a bar than had the women call me. He was upset because I went to a meeting and he claims i put that before him. I said some really horrible things to him, out of the anger, things he did not know and i never intended to tell him. H...
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Heather 68
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3
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300
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easy is for fools
(Preview)
Quick little post before I go to work. My oldest son was hit with a virus. I have it now, was up all night with a fever. My house looks like a tornado ran through it. I will clean it when I start to feel better. My AH has broke his own record being sober more than 75 days, yesterday he said he had to get to his...
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1976love
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3
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228
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is this self pity?
(Preview)
lately im feeling very detached from myself, if that makes sense. my home life seems to go from bad to worse and i am wondering if everyone has a breaking point? im managing to keep going and put a brave face on but its a lie. i dont feel brave or normal. im wondering if i have a limit before i lose my mind. i wan...
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el-cee
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9
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394
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Finally caught him red-handed
(Preview)
So much for his denials. I can say I finally caught him, though it doesn't make me feel better. I found some white chunks in his cigarette pack. He still tried to say he didn't know what it was, til I touched it to my tongue and it numbed my mouth and throat. Then he finally admitted it. I flushed it. I wa...
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NicoleDiver
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7
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338
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What to do?
(Preview)
So this morning I found several hypodermic needles in my fiancées bathroom I already gave her an ultimatum that if she continues to use it would be over. She swears they're old and she needed to take them someplace to dispose of. What do I do? I want to believe her but I dont know... What do I do with the need...
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Lupo
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5
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288
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Addictions and Codependency
(Preview)
Hi everyone. Hope things are going ok for you. I started reading Courage To Change because my library happened to have it. I miss my Hope For Today book and am hoping to gind one at an Alanon meeting. My health has gotten really bad and I'm trying to do everything I can to stop smoking. My addiction goes alo...
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WorkingThroughIt
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8
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297
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Still Working Thru It
(Preview)
I have not posted in months, been reading and keeping up with everyone else but it has been too hard to post. Still seperated from AH, handed him divorce papers and he went into full "I'll change" mode. He is on new medications for his bipolar and they are seeming to help. I feel stuck in limbo a...
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TrudyS85
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4
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289
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Today we went to court
(Preview)
Today was a very hard day. AH is so angry with me about this court case. Things did not go well today, mainly because AH is so egotistical and thought he should represent himself in front of the judge. Never a good idea. I am giving it all to my HP and trying so hard to do the next right thing. Not react, think,...
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ParisMemories
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3
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412
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