Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

faith84 · faith84

I stole this from an NA website, although it was written by an addict/alcoholic, for an addict/alcoholic, I thought It was extremely powerful for both the addict/alcoholic AND their loved one. It puts into perspective that we, as the loving family members who are on a consistent and trying journe...

stephaniej · stephaniej

My birthday is coming up, and after YEARS of not doing anything to celebrate it except to stay at home with my AH (if he is in town) and my children, this year I really, really wanted to go out and do something. I still don't know a lot of people or have a large group of friends here, but I reached out to my smal...

Ms co-dependent · Ms co-dependent

I have to say thank you to my husband for all the bad things he did all the harm and that last button he pushed made me hit the bottom of that his job was done to bring me there. We all have a purpose in life and I guess we change by the poor choices and the suffering that goes with it. He sober today his higher powe...

Bettina · Bettina

" Have you ever noticed that great moments of courage & Wisdom come in response to a great problem. Adversity gives us an opportunity to bring out our best." unk

pinkchip · pinkchip

I was reading other posts - not judging but feeling bad and wondering what is the point of staying with someone that treats you like crap? Of course then I had to remember, which I often do, that I have a long history of staying in crappy relationships and that continued all the way up until working the 12 s...

Melly1248 · Melly1248

Ugh, A has switched addictions again and I must get my head together and control my anger and dissapointment and keep the focus on myself! When I met him, he was an out of control drunk who would make booty-calls at 3am every night; and, being a newly-single and awfully codependant mum I was just lonely e...

grateful2be · grateful2be

My son will be celebrating his 38th birthday tomorrow. He is two years shy of 40. Mid-life for many of us. He has had severe allergies, breathing problems, was hit by three different vehicles in his teens - a van, a City bus, and finally a truck that sent him flying 30 feet in the air and coming back to t...

Tracy · Tracy

Hi All, Feeling good today. The disease has raised its head in my extended family my Cousin 27 is in a really bad place due to drink and drugs trying to take his life etc. His dad was visiting my parents he is 65 and my mum shared how my partner had been sober for a year and about me attending al anon. he said h...

oldergal · oldergal

This indeed is a great Board, and it is really a "board". Problems are presented here, they are looked at, brain stormed, analyzed and given the best ESH we have to give. We care and support all. Prayers are always in order. I think I would be lost without the great people here, and still in pai...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Good Morning everyone I want to say thank you for your continued support. My hand was held and I could let go let God. I didn't help, I didn't enable. My son did call and I just asked him to call his sponsor, reunite and move forward. I love you son. What the future holds for him I do not know. Your suppor...

amills4294 · amills4294

I've been very remiss in not participating in this board for a long time. I should be going to meetings again but have always found reasons not to lately. For those of you I've "chatted with" - sorry for being gone... for those that I have not met yet welcome and thanks for taking the time to r...

AngryAndScared · AngryAndScared

I apologize in advance. I am EXTREMELY long winded, especially when I'm trying to paint an entire picture. This is everything that contributes to my fear that my husband is an alcoholic or at least is heading in that direction. Do you think he has or is developing a problem, or am I just scared becaus...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am posting this for tomorrow--some of you are already there! I am doing this because on Weds. I can't get on here. I am unable to post on my tablet at this time & I am not complaining. I am just sending a special Hello to all of you in the future. Isn't that crazy? I guess if tomorrow never comes for me, I w...

shanb1970 · shanb1970

My brother is currently gone 5 days drinking straight, hasn't gone to work, hasn't eaten, hasn't showered, is not answering his kids calls......he is holed up in his house...just drinking...this will be the 5th time he has done this....and lost alot, and regained alot...about to lose it all again....

neshema2 · neshema2

We praise and reward our loved ones when they do good or have a breakthrough, so why not do that for me???? I had an U G L Y coda moment where I wrote this letter (deleted and NOT sent---thanks to the ESH'rs who brought me up short---thank you all) And I did not send the letter.........i typed it......hel...

tortuga · tortuga

it had to happen. since a couple of days I'm torn between resentment and anger and melancholy and gratitude. Gratitude is where I would like to end up with, to find my peace. But I feel like I have to climb Mt.Everest...with no oxygen. I'm still doubting if I can do it. for a long time I didn't allow myself...

Grits · Grits

Hope you all can clear this up for me. We live in a rural area and there is not an NA meeting around but there is AA and Al-anon. My daughter started going to AA to deal with her addiction to pain pills and has now been clean for 30 days. She has continued to drink alcohol and it does not seem to be a problem. ...

grateful2be · grateful2be

Does anybody out there have a consolidated list of examples showing the difference between boundaries and walls in relationship to adult children in active stages of alcoholism they can post for us parents? And anybody else who'd like the same info? Thanks, family.

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

I am a free American last time I checked and entitled to my personal beliefs! Thanks for respecting my beliefs, just like I do yours whether I agree or not that is what makes us who we are and Thank God we are not all the same drone of a human being that can not have our own minds. I love each and every one of you m...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

The reason I felt I had to take a break from the boards for a bit was because I felt like I was always posting about 'him', the AH. I wasn't feeling healthy even though I was working my program. I think these boards became my venting place and I wanted to step away from that and gain some perspective and jus...

Gaby · Gaby

This weekend I went it visit my son in Silver Spring Christian Base Rehab. I got there in good spirits and left in good spirits. He prayed for me and with me. He knows the addiction still effects me. I see my son again.. He tells me mom I know you have access to my money one thing I ask of you is to please find me a...

Jerry F · Jerry F

By Joani Gammill...My wife just got me an early birthday present...two parts; one this book which I want to say if you have it or have read it or don't and haven't...the first 15 pages speak from inside of the addict and alcoholic. Of course she knows...she is a recovering addict; female, mom, RN, wi...

troubledheart · troubledheart

I am really hurt & confused....I made my ex leave last year because of his drug problem. I was to the point of not knowing what to do anymore. I thought & prayed many nights about what I needed to do. So I finally decided that he should move out & maybe he would see just how serious I was. I had to s...

Bettina · Bettina

The Human Spirit is as expansive as the Cosmos. This is why its so tragic to belittle yourself or to question your worth. No matter what happens continue to push back the boundaries of your "Inner Life". Ikeda

tortuga · tortuga

good morning MIP I wanted to share something which I have experienced much and paying attention to over the past 10 years. It is a way of getting to know yourself, learning to listen to your inner voice and trusting your 'gut' as some would name it. It all began over 10 years ago when I entered therapy and...

Melly1248 · Melly1248

Anyone know why I can't edit or delete any of my posts? It just says "you don't have permission to do that" if I try to delete, and if I try to edit, it appears to have worked but then the post just reverts to how it was before when i refresh the page. Well, I'll try to edit this one since I just wrote i...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

My mom is now transferred to another hospital very close to returning home. I am glad that she is not going to come home too soon. I am nervous about her getting out. I guess because I had a dream about her coming home before I saw her yesterday, I feel a little apprehensive myself. Anyhow, I still feel pret...

grateful2be · grateful2be

At 64, I've gotten to the place in life where I am no longer willing to take on our culture's expectations of me as a Mother. I don't have power over my adult children's choices. I don't have to take on their burdens, their problems, the consequences for their choices. I don't have to blame myself for t...

islandtime · islandtime

I have Courage to Change Was looking at Amazon, thinking about the 12 Step Workbook...or Blueprint for Progress 4th step inventory ???? what books were helpful in working the steps?

islandtime · islandtime

In my case, I'm thinking maybe he's just not worth the effort. Yes I am and will continue to put major work into ME.....BUT I thinking putting any effort into staying together would be a waste of my energy. I think I rode this horse till it died, conuinued to sit on the dead carcus while the bizzards picked...

neshema2 · neshema2

I DID NOT SEND THIS>.....IT IS ON HOLD..>>>THINKING OF SENDING BUT HAVE NOT YET DONE SO>>>>>>>>>>NEED ESH PLEASE I will not reply back.... This is just some decisions for me and it matters not how you take it.......So if you write back, I won't reply...

Lay · Lay

It has been a while since I've been on here. I will have to update soon, but I was reading through different posts one in particular caught my attention, so I am going to share my story. Especially with anyone who may feel defeated. I have different mental health problems starting with borderline perso...

Mari1978 · Mari1978

My father in law has called me the enabeler. This was many months ago when my AH was in detox for a week.( he was sober for 3 mnths after that) Tonight he was half bombed and decided to attend an AA meeting (not sure how to let my mind absorb that yet...waiting to see what tomorrow brings before I begin to get m...

Pushka · Pushka

Kids are off on their social stuff for the weekend .. daughter is excited she has a homecoming dance coming up in Oct. An event apparently that is focused and obsessed upon by all teens now instead of more like a week before it happens .. ROFL. My boy is off having a field day with a friend of his. He got t...

Melly1248 · Melly1248

What an eye-opening weekend so far. In ways I could not have anticipated! Excuse the long rambly story, but I made a decision, on my way home, that rather than come home and get upset with the A all night, I would sit down at my desk and write it out here instead. (I could have just journalled it but I guess I w...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

I got another call today from my son's landlord. He wants my son out. I asked him PLEASE call the police. My son was incoherent and could even stand. The landlord told him to drive to the park and sleep it off. I couldn't let my son drive so I called the Police. They were on their way when the landlord call...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Good afternoon friends Today I'm excepting the things I can not change and working to change me..one day at a time. My recovery time is much faster so now if I can control my emotions during height of the crisis I will do so much better keeping my heart and mind calm. My fear last night became so bad I got...

neshema2 · neshema2

Well alanoners, this morning, I felt kinda "BLEH!!!" and I was not going to let me wallow in that....so i picked my self up....threw on some shorts, tank top an out to the trampolene, I marched....music in the parlor blasting oldies out the sliding glass door and onto that trampolene......

rehprof · rehprof

Just saw a cartoon...stick figure with MANY word balloons over his head... He was saying "Hello, My name is Mike, and I'm a thinkaholic..." Man, could I relate... RP

MeTwo2 · MeTwo2

love these epiphanys .. after the fact .. but .. for what it's worth .. I went to a meeting the other night and someone shared their A would look at them and say 'xxxx' liar .. It wasn't what she was saying but the look on her face that made her share a little on the lighter humorous side although there's noth...

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

I'm not sure where to begin with this. I've been trying to get my alcoholic brother to send my deceased mother's phone book to me but haven't had any luck. I finally gave up on that. I'm not on fb and don't want to be. I've made some attempts to find a few family and friends with whom there hasn't been any c...

slogan_jim · slogan_jim

Hi Everyone, My name is Slogan_jim and I am a grateful member of al-anon. I woke up this morning feeling very overwhelmed. I feel like I am tackling the world by myself. What triggered this was last night I was over at a friends house and they had just come back from a trip in the states. They kept showing of...

oldergal · oldergal

When your trust is betrayed and you become the wife whose A husband was untrue to you by internet porn and phone sex. How did you or do you learn to trust again. Does that innocent trust ever come back again. They say that the unforgiveness of someone is worse on you than the other person. If you have any exp...

mm830 · mm830

For almost four years I cannot remember having a good weekend. Starting the same pattern tonight. However, this weekend I will not worry if A is drinking, will not obsess about where he is who he is with. I will not walk on eggshells afraid to piss him off naturally he is mad at me its a given. And you know wh...

grateful2be · grateful2be

I was waiting at a stoplight this afternoon. I was rear-ended so hard my vehicle was pushed a few feet forward nearly missing traffic moving at 55 mph to 60 mph. the man who hit me - you guessed it - was high. Tried to convince me my vehicle was fine and to take off. I told him he'd have to stay. I was calli...

mm830 · mm830

Sometimes the known is easier in my head than the unknown. Interesting how many posts I read here resonate and I don't feel so alone right now. That I am so thankful for this board it is changing my thinking in so many ways. But truthfully I am scared of the unknown and I know that has to do with letting HP tak...

goodmonkey · goodmonkey

I'm leaving a city in the Pacific Northwest and going back to my home city right now. I cried a bit when I checked out of the hotel (via the TV- I couldn't let the hotel people see me cry!). I felt so safe in the hotel room all week. I was around 200 coworkers and felt very safe around them too... (Lonely at ti...

Bettina · Bettina

Hawaii was voted the happiest state in the Union... Must be the Aloha spirit... Do you know that Hawaii has more diversity than any other state and they celebrate their different ethnicities. Imagine , most are mixes of Japanese, Hawaiian, Portugese, Dutch, you would be going to a parade everyday...

irukan · irukan

I have been experiencing abdominal pain for the last 6 weeks, and the doctors so far cannot find anything "wrong." Of course, the pain is still here but no matter what type of stress relief I employ the pain remains.Next is either a medication or for them to look inside my intestine with a ca...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

You make me wanna shot, throw my hands up & shout, wait a minute? I am so grateful for my sense of humor. I don't get to share enough about the funny stuff. I am very serious. I have those moments when I just want to belly laugh. I am so happy that this is a safe place for me to share everything within reason...

Nancy ANN · Nancy ANN

I'm too the point tonight where I feel like I'm sinking .Don't know where to turn .I went to Alanon meetings many years ago for another situation in my life .I know I need to go back .Just need someone to listen now .My beautiful daughter is an alcoholic and so mentally unstable .This has been going on for...

hotrod · hotrod

http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t49437211/tradition-3-alanon/

tortuga · tortuga

mm830 and Melly asked me in a recent post to share how I did it. How did I stay away from A after leaving, and after he is the sweetest guy of the universe again, after he hit me the last time we actually met...? it is hard,and I didn't do it out of full conviction. Many doubts were there, some still come back fr...

islandtime · islandtime

Well it seems now that I have flung open the door, I'm kicking a few asses out of it. People that are not worthy of my friendship, or time. I thought I was friends with a couple of women, but the more I got to know them, I realized they were awful mean spirited, gossiping, back stabbing, b***. I go to a gym se...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am so grateful for my cell phone these days. It does more for me than I realized. I used to almost hate it because it is touch screen & I almost always seem to touch the wrong thing. But, not these days! I am so glad that I can record like on a tape recorder my favorite songs & all. I couldn't possibly...

Bettina · Bettina

"Your Value doesn't decrease based on someone's inability to see your Worth." Unk

Jen61 · Jen61

My husband started drinking about 8 years ago. It was not all the time, day in and day out, but he drank. He has quit before and I always felt wow, okay, we can go on. But, it did not last long. I finally told him two months ago I could not do this anymore and that he would have to leave. He was gone for 4 days...

Ms co-dependent · Ms co-dependent

Something happen this morning I felt odd different I think it has something to do with last night I made a hole in a shoe box and labeled it ms negativity . I looked at my self in my photos I take lots of and when I see that girl I'n the photo I seen some one other than me . I saw this girl lost but not ugly or stupid d...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

This is why I love my MIP family! You all so gently reminded me that hurting people hurt people and since a few of my new found friends are not in a recovery program I am noticing that they could probably use one. I know I have no control over them and maybe need to lower my expectations and just study with the...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

I knew I would have ups and downs. Well the down came again. I got a call from my son's landlord and my son is drunk, has been for days and his landlord wants him out. I told him I can't do anything about it, he will have to call the police and whatever he needs to do. Now my anxiety has jumped up. I am doing al...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Addict in a Hole (Preview) I stole this from an NA website, although it was written by an addict/alcoholic, for an addict/alcoholic, I thought It was extremely powerful for both the addict/alcoholic AND their loved one. It puts into perspective that we, as the loving family members who are on a consistent and trying journe...	faith84	3	639	Sep 18, 2013 by tortuga
	Oooo, I've run up against a codependency trigger... (Preview) My birthday is coming up, and after YEARS of not doing anything to celebrate it except to stay at home with my AH (if he is in town) and my children, this year I really, really wanted to go out and do something. I still don't know a lot of people or have a large group of friends here, but I reached out to my smal...	stephaniej	5	369	Sep 18, 2013 by tiredtonite
	Hitting rock bottom is good (Preview) I have to say thank you to my husband for all the bad things he did all the harm and that last button he pushed made me hit the bottom of that his job was done to bring me there. We all have a purpose in life and I guess we change by the poor choices and the suffering that goes with it. He sober today his higher powe...	Ms co-dependent	9	593	Sep 18, 2013 by hotrod
	Adversity is an Opportunity (Preview) " Have you ever noticed that great moments of courage & Wisdom come in response to a great problem. Adversity gives us an opportunity to bring out our best." unk	Bettina	2	262	Sep 18, 2013 by PP
	Why did I stay with someone that treated me like crap? (Preview) I was reading other posts - not judging but feeling bad and wondering what is the point of staying with someone that treats you like crap? Of course then I had to remember, which I often do, that I have a long history of staying in crappy relationships and that continued all the way up until working the 12 s...	pinkchip	25	862	Sep 18, 2013 by Raven Juniper
	A long rant that contains the word "HE" a lot. (Preview) Ugh, A has switched addictions again and I must get my head together and control my anger and dissapointment and keep the focus on myself! When I met him, he was an out of control drunk who would make booty-calls at 3am every night; and, being a newly-single and awfully codependant mum I was just lonely e...	Melly1248	9	657	Sep 18, 2013 by hisimage
	My son and my vain imaginings (Preview) My son will be celebrating his 38th birthday tomorrow. He is two years shy of 40. Mid-life for many of us. He has had severe allergies, breathing problems, was hit by three different vehicles in his teens - a van, a City bus, and finally a truck that sent him flying 30 feet in the air and coming back to t...	grateful2be	13	3476	Sep 18, 2013 by grateful2be
	healthy support (Preview) Hi All, Feeling good today. The disease has raised its head in my extended family my Cousin 27 is in a really bad place due to drink and drugs trying to take his life etc. His dad was visiting my parents he is 65 and my mum shared how my partner had been sober for a year and about me attending al anon. he said h...	Tracy	3	244	Sep 18, 2013 by hotrod
	THE BOARD (Preview) This indeed is a great Board, and it is really a "board". Problems are presented here, they are looked at, brain stormed, analyzed and given the best ESH we have to give. We care and support all. Prayers are always in order. I think I would be lost without the great people here, and still in pai...	oldergal	7	430	Sep 18, 2013 by hotrod
	My HP was with me and so was MIP (Preview) Good Morning everyone I want to say thank you for your continued support. My hand was held and I could let go let God. I didn't help, I didn't enable. My son did call and I just asked him to call his sponsor, reunite and move forward. I love you son. What the future holds for him I do not know. Your suppor...	Cathyinaz	12	726	Sep 18, 2013 by hotrod
	Alcoholic Mom admitted to hospital (Preview) I've been very remiss in not participating in this board for a long time. I should be going to meetings again but have always found reasons not to lately. For those of you I've "chatted with" - sorry for being gone... for those that I have not met yet welcome and thanks for taking the time to r...	amills4294	7	449	Sep 18, 2013 by neshema2
	Is my husband (becoming) an alcoholic? (Very long.) (Preview) I apologize in advance. I am EXTREMELY long winded, especially when I'm trying to paint an entire picture. This is everything that contributes to my fear that my husband is an alcoholic or at least is heading in that direction. Do you think he has or is developing a problem, or am I just scared becaus...	AngryAndScared	6	578	Sep 18, 2013 by neshema2
	one for tomorrow (Preview) I am posting this for tomorrow--some of you are already there! I am doing this because on Weds. I can't get on here. I am unable to post on my tablet at this time & I am not complaining. I am just sending a special Hello to all of you in the future. Isn't that crazy? I guess if tomorrow never comes for me, I w...	Hoot Nanny	1	252	Sep 18, 2013 by grateful2be
	What should I do? (Preview) My brother is currently gone 5 days drinking straight, hasn't gone to work, hasn't eaten, hasn't showered, is not answering his kids calls......he is holed up in his house...just drinking...this will be the 5th time he has done this....and lost alot, and regained alot...about to lose it all again....	shanb1970	19	557	Sep 18, 2013 by shanb1970
	Giving my adult self a reward for overcoming (Preview) We praise and reward our loved ones when they do good or have a breakthrough, so why not do that for me???? I had an U G L Y coda moment where I wrote this letter (deleted and NOT sent---thanks to the ESH'rs who brought me up short---thank you all) And I did not send the letter.........i typed it......hel...	neshema2	9	407	Sep 17, 2013 by neshema2
	working through resentment towards gratitude: an odyssey!!! (Preview) it had to happen. since a couple of days I'm torn between resentment and anger and melancholy and gratitude. Gratitude is where I would like to end up with, to find my peace. But I feel like I have to climb Mt.Everest...with no oxygen. I'm still doubting if I can do it. for a long time I didn't allow myself...	tortuga	5	348	Sep 17, 2013 by el-cee
	Can you be an addict and not an alcoholic? (Preview) Hope you all can clear this up for me. We live in a rural area and there is not an NA meeting around but there is AA and Al-anon. My daughter started going to AA to deal with her addiction to pain pills and has now been clean for 30 days. She has continued to drink alcohol and it does not seem to be a problem. ...	Grits	6	499	Sep 17, 2013 by Grits
	Walls vs boundaries in relationship to adult children in active stages of alcoholsim? (Preview) Does anybody out there have a consolidated list of examples showing the difference between boundaries and walls in relationship to adult children in active stages of alcoholism they can post for us parents? And anybody else who'd like the same info? Thanks, family.	grateful2be	14	872	Sep 17, 2013 by Melly1248
	Am I being reactionary? I want to put this on my fb status? (Preview) I am a free American last time I checked and entitled to my personal beliefs! Thanks for respecting my beliefs, just like I do yours whether I agree or not that is what makes us who we are and Thank God we are not all the same drone of a human being that can not have our own minds. I love each and every one of you m...	Breakingfree	24	910	Sep 17, 2013 by ClearTheFog
	I'm back, looking for perspective (Preview) The reason I felt I had to take a break from the boards for a bit was because I felt like I was always posting about 'him', the AH. I wasn't feeling healthy even though I was working my program. I think these boards became my venting place and I wanted to step away from that and gain some perspective and jus...	ilovedogs	24	679	Sep 17, 2013 by ilovedogs
	A great visit with my son :) (Preview) This weekend I went it visit my son in Silver Spring Christian Base Rehab. I got there in good spirits and left in good spirits. He prayed for me and with me. He knows the addiction still effects me. I see my son again.. He tells me mom I know you have access to my money one thing I ask of you is to please find me a...	Gaby	6	385	Sep 17, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	The interventionist (Preview) By Joani Gammill...My wife just got me an early birthday present...two parts; one this book which I want to say if you have it or have read it or don't and haven't...the first 15 pages speak from inside of the addict and alcoholic. Of course she knows...she is a recovering addict; female, mom, RN, wi...	Jerry F	2	295	Sep 17, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	hurt & confused (Preview) I am really hurt & confused....I made my ex leave last year because of his drug problem. I was to the point of not knowing what to do anymore. I thought & prayed many nights about what I needed to do. So I finally decided that he should move out & maybe he would see just how serious I was. I had to s...	troubledheart	7	461	Sep 17, 2013 by troubledheart
	Perspective! (Preview) The Human Spirit is as expansive as the Cosmos. This is why its so tragic to belittle yourself or to question your worth. No matter what happens continue to push back the boundaries of your "Inner Life". Ikeda	Bettina	2	217	Sep 17, 2013 by grateful2be
	my experience with power of dreams (Preview) good morning MIP I wanted to share something which I have experienced much and paying attention to over the past 10 years. It is a way of getting to know yourself, learning to listen to your inner voice and trusting your 'gut' as some would name it. It all began over 10 years ago when I entered therapy and...	tortuga	4	496	Sep 17, 2013 by Melly1248
	edit/delete? (Preview) Anyone know why I can't edit or delete any of my posts? It just says "you don't have permission to do that" if I try to delete, and if I try to edit, it appears to have worked but then the post just reverts to how it was before when i refresh the page. Well, I'll try to edit this one since I just wrote i...	Melly1248	4	324	Sep 17, 2013 by Melly1248
	just a few minutes to reflect (Preview) My mom is now transferred to another hospital very close to returning home. I am glad that she is not going to come home too soon. I am nervous about her getting out. I guess because I had a dream about her coming home before I saw her yesterday, I feel a little apprehensive myself. Anyhow, I still feel pret...	Hoot Nanny	1	176	Sep 17, 2013 by grateful2be
	Mothers (Preview) At 64, I've gotten to the place in life where I am no longer willing to take on our culture's expectations of me as a Mother. I don't have power over my adult children's choices. I don't have to take on their burdens, their problems, the consequences for their choices. I don't have to blame myself for t...	grateful2be	25	670	Sep 17, 2013 by grateful2be
	Book suggestions anyone?? (Preview) I have Courage to Change Was looking at Amazon, thinking about the 12 Step Workbook...or Blueprint for Progress 4th step inventory ???? what books were helpful in working the steps?	islandtime	5	386	Sep 17, 2013 by Jerry F
	maybe he's just not worth it (Preview) In my case, I'm thinking maybe he's just not worth the effort. Yes I am and will continue to put major work into ME.....BUT I thinking putting any effort into staying together would be a waste of my energy. I think I rode this horse till it died, conuinued to sit on the dead carcus while the bizzards picked...	islandtime	7	501	Sep 16, 2013 by RunnerChick
	OFF TOPIC...Thinking of sending this to abusive sister (Preview) I DID NOT SEND THIS>.....IT IS ON HOLD..>>>THINKING OF SENDING BUT HAVE NOT YET DONE SO>>>>>>>>>>NEED ESH PLEASE I will not reply back.... This is just some decisions for me and it matters not how you take it.......So if you write back, I won't reply...	neshema2	10	343	Sep 16, 2013 by PP
	Opening my heart (Preview) It has been a while since I've been on here. I will have to update soon, but I was reading through different posts one in particular caught my attention, so I am going to share my story. Especially with anyone who may feel defeated. I have different mental health problems starting with borderline perso...	Lay	4	334	Sep 16, 2013 by Raven Juniper
	Enabling? (Preview) My father in law has called me the enabeler. This was many months ago when my AH was in detox for a week.( he was sober for 3 mnths after that) Tonight he was half bombed and decided to attend an AA meeting (not sure how to let my mind absorb that yet...waiting to see what tomorrow brings before I begin to get m...	Mari1978	11	606	Sep 16, 2013 by Mari1978
	Weekend :) (Preview) Kids are off on their social stuff for the weekend .. daughter is excited she has a homecoming dance coming up in Oct. An event apparently that is focused and obsessed upon by all teens now instead of more like a week before it happens .. ROFL. My boy is off having a field day with a friend of his. He got t...	Pushka	3	365	Sep 16, 2013 by Pushka
	Everyone is crazy except for me! (Preview) What an eye-opening weekend so far. In ways I could not have anticipated! Excuse the long rambly story, but I made a decision, on my way home, that rather than come home and get upset with the A all night, I would sit down at my desk and write it out here instead. (I could have just journalled it but I guess I w...	Melly1248	7	469	Sep 16, 2013 by faith84
	My son (Preview) I got another call today from my son's landlord. He wants my son out. I asked him PLEASE call the police. My son was incoherent and could even stand. The landlord told him to drive to the park and sleep it off. I couldn't let my son drive so I called the Police. They were on their way when the landlord call...	Cathyinaz	18	560	Sep 16, 2013 by hisimage
	I'm dong better today (Preview) Good afternoon friends Today I'm excepting the things I can not change and working to change me..one day at a time. My recovery time is much faster so now if I can control my emotions during height of the crisis I will do so much better keeping my heart and mind calm. My fear last night became so bad I got...	Cathyinaz	13	546	Sep 16, 2013 by AngelicH57
	I honestly don't feel any rancor (Preview) Well alanoners, this morning, I felt kinda "BLEH!!!" and I was not going to let me wallow in that....so i picked my self up....threw on some shorts, tank top an out to the trampolene, I marched....music in the parlor blasting oldies out the sliding glass door and onto that trampolene......	neshema2	12	833	Sep 16, 2013 by tiredtonite
	A bit of an epiphany (Preview) Just saw a cartoon...stick figure with MANY word balloons over his head... He was saying "Hello, My name is Mike, and I'm a thinkaholic..." Man, could I relate... RP	rehprof	6	383	Sep 16, 2013 by lgnutah
	dam defects .. Never saw this .. kinda funny but duh .. (Preview) love these epiphanys .. after the fact .. but .. for what it's worth .. I went to a meeting the other night and someone shared their A would look at them and say 'xxxx' liar .. It wasn't what she was saying but the look on her face that made her share a little on the lighter humorous side although there's noth...	MeTwo2	8	531	Sep 15, 2013 by grateful2be
	Estranged Family (Preview) I'm not sure where to begin with this. I've been trying to get my alcoholic brother to send my deceased mother's phone book to me but haven't had any luck. I finally gave up on that. I'm not on fb and don't want to be. I've made some attempts to find a few family and friends with whom there hasn't been any c...	tiredtonite	6	516	Sep 15, 2013 by tiredtonite
	Feeling Overwhelmed (Preview) Hi Everyone, My name is Slogan_jim and I am a grateful member of al-anon. I woke up this morning feeling very overwhelmed. I feel like I am tackling the world by myself. What triggered this was last night I was over at a friends house and they had just come back from a trip in the states. They kept showing of...	slogan_jim	14	596	Sep 15, 2013 by cwya
	On Trust and Infidelity (Preview) When your trust is betrayed and you become the wife whose A husband was untrue to you by internet porn and phone sex. How did you or do you learn to trust again. Does that innocent trust ever come back again. They say that the unforgiveness of someone is worse on you than the other person. If you have any exp...	oldergal	17	735	Sep 15, 2013 by islandtime
	Digging In (Preview) For almost four years I cannot remember having a good weekend. Starting the same pattern tonight. However, this weekend I will not worry if A is drinking, will not obsess about where he is who he is with. I will not walk on eggshells afraid to piss him off naturally he is mad at me its a given. And you know wh...	mm830	16	516	Sep 15, 2013 by grateful2be
	Hit and Run and recovery (Preview) I was waiting at a stoplight this afternoon. I was rear-ended so hard my vehicle was pushed a few feet forward nearly missing traffic moving at 55 mph to 60 mph. the man who hit me - you guessed it - was high. Tried to convince me my vehicle was fine and to take off. I told him he'd have to stay. I was calli...	grateful2be	26	676	Sep 15, 2013 by grateful2be
	Acceptance and Willingness to Change (Preview) Sometimes the known is easier in my head than the unknown. Interesting how many posts I read here resonate and I don't feel so alone right now. That I am so thankful for this board it is changing my thinking in so many ways. But truthfully I am scared of the unknown and I know that has to do with letting HP tak...	mm830	8	579	Sep 15, 2013 by islandtime
	Happy to go home, sad to go home... (Preview) I'm leaving a city in the Pacific Northwest and going back to my home city right now. I cried a bit when I checked out of the hotel (via the TV- I couldn't let the hotel people see me cry!). I felt so safe in the hotel room all week. I was around 200 coworkers and felt very safe around them too... (Lonely at ti...	goodmonkey	8	478	Sep 15, 2013 by bulebelle
	Hawaii Jerry!!!! (Preview) Hawaii was voted the happiest state in the Union... Must be the Aloha spirit... Do you know that Hawaii has more diversity than any other state and they celebrate their different ethnicities. Imagine , most are mixes of Japanese, Hawaiian, Portugese, Dutch, you would be going to a parade everyday...	Bettina	16	564	Sep 15, 2013 by maryjane
	Chronic pain and higher power (Preview) I have been experiencing abdominal pain for the last 6 weeks, and the doctors so far cannot find anything "wrong." Of course, the pain is still here but no matter what type of stress relief I employ the pain remains.Next is either a medication or for them to look inside my intestine with a ca...	irukan	17	684	Sep 15, 2013 by grateful2be
	wait a minute. (Preview) You make me wanna shot, throw my hands up & shout, wait a minute? I am so grateful for my sense of humor. I don't get to share enough about the funny stuff. I am very serious. I have those moments when I just want to belly laugh. I am so happy that this is a safe place for me to share everything within reason...	Hoot Nanny	4	371	Sep 15, 2013 by hotrod
	My hearts breaking .Alcoholic daughter threating suicide .We can't let her live with us . (Preview) I'm too the point tonight where I feel like I'm sinking .Don't know where to turn .I went to Alanon meetings many years ago for another situation in my life .I know I need to go back .Just need someone to listen now .My beautiful daughter is an alcoholic and so mentally unstable .This has been going on for...	Nancy ANN	18	910	Sep 15, 2013 by grateful2be
	TRADITION 3 (Preview) http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t49437211/tradition-3-alanon/	hotrod	3	932	Sep 14, 2013 by fixitall
	what comes after the courage to leave... (Preview) mm830 and Melly asked me in a recent post to share how I did it. How did I stay away from A after leaving, and after he is the sweetest guy of the universe again, after he hit me the last time we actually met...? it is hard,and I didn't do it out of full conviction. Many doubts were there, some still come back fr...	tortuga	9	430	Sep 14, 2013 by Melly1248
	getting away from other bad people too (Preview) Well it seems now that I have flung open the door, I'm kicking a few asses out of it. People that are not worthy of my friendship, or time. I thought I was friends with a couple of women, but the more I got to know them, I realized they were awful mean spirited, gossiping, back stabbing, b***. I go to a gym se...	islandtime	10	581	Sep 14, 2013 by lgnutah
	slogans, quotes & sayings on my cell phone! (Preview) I am so grateful for my cell phone these days. It does more for me than I realized. I used to almost hate it because it is touch screen & I almost always seem to touch the wrong thing. But, not these days! I am so glad that I can record like on a tape recorder my favorite songs & all. I couldn't possibly...	Hoot Nanny	5	2153	Sep 14, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	Value (Preview) "Your Value doesn't decrease based on someone's inability to see your Worth." Unk	Bettina	5	331	Sep 14, 2013 by neshema2
	Believing in the future (Preview) My husband started drinking about 8 years ago. It was not all the time, day in and day out, but he drank. He has quit before and I always felt wow, okay, we can go on. But, it did not last long. I finally told him two months ago I could not do this anymore and that he would have to leave. He was gone for 4 days...	Jen61	5	402	Sep 14, 2013 by neshema2
	Woke up to see the fog is gone (Preview) Something happen this morning I felt odd different I think it has something to do with last night I made a hole in a shoe box and labeled it ms negativity . I looked at my self in my photos I take lots of and when I see that girl I'n the photo I seen some one other than me . I saw this girl lost but not ugly or stupid d...	Ms co-dependent	7	522	Sep 13, 2013 by neshema2
	Hurting people hurt people (Not a new revelation) (Preview) This is why I love my MIP family! You all so gently reminded me that hurting people hurt people and since a few of my new found friends are not in a recovery program I am noticing that they could probably use one. I know I have no control over them and maybe need to lower my expectations and just study with the...	Breakingfree	6	430	Sep 14, 2013 by Katytexasmom
	OH BOY (Preview) I knew I would have ups and downs. Well the down came again. I got a call from my son's landlord and my son is drunk, has been for days and his landlord wants him out. I told him I can't do anything about it, he will have to call the police and whatever he needs to do. Now my anxiety has jumped up. I am doing al...	Cathyinaz	21	533	Sep 14, 2013 by Katytexasmom
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.