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Somehow I can turn my life upside down!
(Preview)
Me and my fiance have been trying to buy this house and we have closing friday. BUT yesterday we ended up in a huge fight! He told me to call the whole thing off and that he is moving out.
Somewere deep down I expected to screw this up and push him away permanantly and it seems as if I have accomplishe...
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jmath31
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3
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252
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the "feeling"
(Preview)
does anyone ever get the feeling in their stomach when crisis hits? that rush,it makes me shake and feel sick. but still i think i might be addicted to it. my a husband moved in with his mother last week. i found out friday. i was so mad. i lost all my peace. but i asked him for money i knew he got paid friday. ju...
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serendipity
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7
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361
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i love but i love with CARE
(Preview)
i went to a hell of a meet last night and we talked about LOVE----being open to it and it brought these feelings/ thoughts/ esh to mind, and thought i would share.....
i think love is like watering a plant, however when i love now, i keep some of my heart in reserve.....like don't love...
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rosie light shines
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1
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362
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am I doing the right thing?
(Preview)
Hi, this is my first post. I need to get this off my chest but haven't the gumption to go to a live meeting. My mom is an A as is her boyfriend of 20 years. He also uses crack. Both my husband and I were raised by A single mothers on welfare. We have 2 children (10 & 12 yrs)....
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Wendy
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5
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278
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Letting go and letting my hp
(Preview)
I dont think I am ready for a relationship
I want out of it right now because I am scared. My boyfriend went to work (he is not an A, but my ex was and I am trying to move past him) and he SHOULD be home by now and he is not. I usually hear from him by now and I havent. I am freaked out beyond bel...
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Cyn
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6
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283
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The Good in an A
(Preview)
Hello everyone.
I don't post a lot, but I sure do spend a lot of time reading other posts. This forum is about all the support I have for my disease and I so appreciate it.
When I first came here, I thought, oh poor me and what I have to put up with. Now I feel that I have a much better perspecti...
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Juster
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8
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388
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Hi everybody
(Preview)
I'm finally back online....been travelling, or not in a private place in which to post. I've missed the message board tremendously. You all are a life line to me.
I'm doing pretty well...good days, and bad days. I went on an antidepressant in October, and it took awhile, but now...
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Belongtome
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1
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235
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Any Advice???
(Preview)
Dear Friends,
Was just sitting here thinking about life and how crazy it can be. Always tought life would be a struggle here and there, but wow everywhere I turn lately it's difficult.
Hub is finally out of the house, I know it is the best thing, just wish the love would go away. The pain and frust...
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Andrea12
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13
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594
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can I murder him?
(Preview)
My daughters baby's father is a young A. An abusive A. He pushed my daughter when she was holding the baby and hit her. He held his hand over her mouth.
She got away and ran to another apt. called police. He ran off. She got out of there, gave thirty days notice and her friend picked them up.
She is coming...
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debilyn
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15
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536
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Hello everyone!
(Preview)
I am new to the board, and just wanted to introduce myself. I went to my first Al-Anon meeting on Tuesday, and I could feel it starting to help. I still have a long way to go, and am having a LOT of trouble and sadness. I am hoping that coming here will help in between times I can go t...
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Atera
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5
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270
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Really hurting today
(Preview)
Good morning all.
I've noticed over the past few days that I've really been keeping myself held hostage by my insecurities. Today is just a little more intense. It's kind of normal for me around this time of year, I suppose, as my birthday approaches and I just have kind of a lot of...
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kspear
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7
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316
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Heart Cry
(Preview)
I used to dabble with poetry .... haven't written in a long while ... it was my outlet back then, a way to express all that I felt. Always meant to do something with my writing...but never have (despite encouragement from friends and teachers). I watch my daughter now doing as I did... pour...
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kismetstrand
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10
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387
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cdb, did you get unburied??? lol
(Preview)
Hey cdb,
Noticed you are posting again- I wondered how hard you got hit with that powerful spring storm that whipped thru your way about a week ago....
Good to see you here again-
Dana
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DanaAngel
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1
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283
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Update for anyone in chat last nite
(Preview)
since I suspect some of you might be a little codie (not taking your inventory, lol), I'm going to be codie and give you an update so you don't worry.
My 15 yo last nite had some old Adderall in her room which I was not aware of. Her and her friend decided to take some to see how it would feel.&n...
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bobump
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8
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399
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OK I Don't Get It!!!
(Preview)
So many of you have mentioned online dating, I can see using it as a screening tool like at Match.com, but this just dating someone you met in chat has me baffled. I don't get how you can fall in love with a computer generated person. It could b anyone's picture. We have enough issues i...
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jrtjosey
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9
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492
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MIP is awesome!
(Preview)
This is my first time using this message board, so bear w/me, please. I have only used the chat room. I have been in the Alanon program for several years. Two months ago, we found out that our son has cancer. Rhabdomyosarcoma. Very rare, especially for his age. ...
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smpoli
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8
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433
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A Visit from the Easter Beagle!
(Preview)
Hi Everyone, I hope your Easter is/was great!
I just wanted to share a little something that happened to me the other night that I cant quit chuckling about!
I went last Friday to Katy, Tx to visit my brother and his family for easter. I arrived there mid afternoon. Once before, about...
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david62
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7
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429
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What makes you happy?
(Preview)
Reading posts this morning on the joys of baseball, the wonder of seeing flowers at the side of the road that were never noticed before.... and it got me thinking of all the pleasures HP has put in my path also.
Flowers... ahh yes, our first spring here (last year) was a wonderful time. Dr...
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kismetstrand
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5
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370
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the tears are starting to come, maybe im start to heal
(Preview)
Worked some more last night on my 4th step. Was thinking about relationships. Thought about growing up, then my early 20s and then to my present. Its all connected. Before I realized it the tears were leaking out. Maybe Im starting to heal?
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Barbara
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4
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266
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spirituality and humor
(Preview)
Hello roomies,
Are spirituality and humor connected? Here's proof they are:
In Nigeria a man was stopped in a speed trap.
As he rolled down the window, he said to the policeman: "How could I be speeding, officer, I have the Holy Ghost , Maria and Jesus riding with me!"
"Hmm...
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toto12
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1
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270
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Awsome,I cried and understood as I watched
(Preview)
http://www.inspiringthots.net/   &nbs...
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d53sjurne
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5
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379
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Simple Gratitude
(Preview)
Ok ok, I need to gloat a bit, hehehe…
I am a fan of baseball. Some are sharing what they are grateful for well I must admit, yup baseball is way up there!
I live in a state that seems to have winters that last way too long. Hearing when the teams report for spring training is music to my ears –ahhh… That ser...
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tea2
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8
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344
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Im in the habit of negative projection
(Preview)
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Barbara
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4
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386
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oh what to do....
(Preview)
Hello everyone...
OK so the lastest in this drama that i call my life...
Last night hubby comes by after his meeting. He says to me... a couple of people are going bowling after the meeting do you want to go with? I hestitate and ask him what his motives are...He say he doesnt unde...
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snt
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4
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307
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affirmations( a gift)
(Preview)
Years ago my Sponcer Mary Lee gave me this affirmation,she died of Cancer,but her memories and leasons are in my heart and mind.This she gave me at one of the lowest points in my life.I had found out my daughter was malested.And working not only to help my daughter,I also needed help f...
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angel123
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4
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346
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Ending the week with a smile
(Preview)
Hello everyone....I survived my birthday...with the help of many of you.
It's funny how I thought I'd learned so much with the ending of my relationship with my ex...who is an A. I told myself what I would put up with and wouldn't. Now I find myself beginning a new relation...
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katrina2000
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3
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250
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why do I let WEATHER affect me so?
(Preview)
Nice day yesterday. Actually quite often its nice through the week and the weekend forecast is projected to be cold & wet. I work indoors M-F 930-5 and no I cant get out on my lunch break - I have a young teen to come home and check on. People come into the library and say "Oh you really should get outside...
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Barbara
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4
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359
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today
(Preview)
Today started out like so many do - me walking around the house - my husband not taking 2 seconds to look me in the face. I walk over to him to say good morning and give him a hug and he barely acknowledges me, half-heartedly hugs me back. He only chooses to engage in conversation with me lately it seems when t...
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sparkette
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5
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374
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Thank you...
(Preview)
Hi everyone,
Thank you all so much for your responses to my post below "trying not to worry." They made me cry and think a lot (especially about trying to control things), and indeed this is something I need to give over to HP. I went and said goodbye to the dog today, and she was put d...
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nal
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1
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272
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life has kicked my butt AGAIN
(Preview)
well i am entering the 60th year of my life and its still hell i made an honest mistake at work, (told the truth to a guy, when the salesmen was not so honest---long story) but anyway, i am facing job loss.....the beat goes on for me....one thing after anohter &nb...
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rosie light shines
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9
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511
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He needs me
(Preview)
Well today he has been calling, he is on a bing again. He is paronoid and talking nonsense. I felt bad today for him, "he needs me" was the feeling I had, maybe if when I talk to him I should be kind, like he tells I should be , instead of talking direct to him about his addiction. This discussion today re-info...
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tootired
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3
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316
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What me worry?
(Preview)
Dear Roomies,
Know what a passport in Germany means? They carry identity cards here--so since USA has no identity cards (well driver's license and credit cards serve same purpose there, but not here,i suppose). We have to use passport which has our permit to stay in Germany st...
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toto12
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3
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295
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Feelings
(Preview)
things get better if i open my mind the real understasnding,Of where I was and where I am now.I have found in my Iife I took things way to personal always want to have approval for I never was good eough as a child to my mom.All I was was in the way.Her focus was on what my father was doing and not...she did no...
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angel123
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2
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278
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just a slip....
(Preview)
man did i ever lose it today. what a slip i had.found out my a husband is staying with his mother. he was so close to hitting bottom. he was so close to really wanting sanity and sobriety for himself and not for me. but his disease got him. or maybe it's juts him i don't know but he called and she went running. h...
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serendipity
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3
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385
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down on myself
(Preview)
Yesterday I woke up so positive, ready to face the day, in spite of not sleeping very regular hours & waking up at weird times of the night (mother sd this would happen w/ aging but I always slept so well ~ she's been right about a lot of things in life (lessons) that I have had to learn in my own stu...
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kitty
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7
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354
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prayer request...
(Preview)
Hi all,
I mentioned in the chat room about the lesion on my right inside lower eyelid, how the doc thinks it may be skin cancer, and that I would like prayers that it won't be cancer. I am posting it on the board here, because I believe in the power of prayer, that God can heal anything, if we take it b...
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lmt123
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12
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320
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Will soon be just scraping by again
(Preview)
A received an accident settlement end of February. A decent sum but not a fortune. From the start we planned on holding aside a certain amount for a rainy day. Of course as time has gone by that amount has shrunk. We didn't "piss" the money away (something an A could literally...
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lebe27
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3
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263
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Need your prayers
(Preview)
It's been over 3 weeks since anyone has heard from my brother. I don't even have a clue if he's in town or if he has left. He didn't even phone on my birthday. I'm just sick about it. I hope that wherever he is he's okay (well as okay as you can be when you're addicted to crack).
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Jayda
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6
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330
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in the dumps again.......
(Preview)
(((friends)))
darn it anyway.I was doing so well.Feeling good,positive about Alanon this time.Not sure what happened.
Well, maybe it was this.Husband (A) went to another state to see his online girlfriend.They finally met.He showed me a picture that she gave him and I didn't think she was att...
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drucilla06
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5
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412
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HELP! URGENT! I need help for my mom
(Preview)
Hello everyone,
I am an adult child of 2 alcoholics, and frankly, I've done all I can do for my father, but I'm just not willing to give up on my mom, who raised me alone from the age of 7 on. About 7 years ago, my mom got sober. It was wonderful! She was like a new person. But about 5 years ago my uncle died from...
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lilmissy707
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7
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353
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still hurting and confused
(Preview)
Well just an update.... he came home that night before i had decided on how to actually handle the situation. saw his stuff by the door and knew. It almost got hostile but we both calmed down. we can do this civilally or not. What hurt most that night was all he had to say was "OK"...
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snt
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8
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313
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need some esh - the impulsivity or the A is at an all time high!
(Preview)
I have hesitated about posting this, probably because 1. once again I feel like I am the only one in the entire world who could possibly be experiencing this 2. I fear the responses that I may get. So hopefully I can push the submit button when I am done and let my Higher Power do the res...
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confused
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11
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394
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do we contact the court or let them deal with brother?
(Preview)
Brother returns to court May 4 for his trial. My mother & I have reason to believe he was raped while in college (things he's said in the past). My mother's psychologist recommended that she send a letter to the court asking for mental help for my brother - told mother she could even give her name, etc...
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Barbara
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3
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276
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Just Venting
(Preview)
I'm annoyed. I haven't talked to any of my husband's family for a year minimum more for some of them. I stopped being involved in thier illusion and decided my efforts were being wasted on people who did not care. So I stopped trying ... what happened after was not one of them contacted me, and he stopped i...
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Jennifer
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7
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401
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Pride & Punishment...
(Preview)
Last night was another night of the roller coaster emotions of my husband. What started out quietly enough turned into him slamming things around and ranting & raving about everything under the sun. I, however, did not go there with him. I chose to stay serene, not let him aff...
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AlaMom
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5
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366
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I am a Rock, I am an Island
(Preview)
I am very sad today. I haven’t been on here much because I can only get on at work. Just a little update on recent events.
He was so drunk one Friday night – man I can’t even remember when, all these days are just melting together – but a month or so ago. He fell and hit his side o...
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dogscribe
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9
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404
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It's amazing when...
(Preview)
It's amazing the things that stand out when you wake up from the fog of oppression and take notice of the beautiful things that HP has placed in your path...
I was driving to pick the kids up from school the other day and I was driving down the road and noticed these long thick bushes bordering the...
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twinmom2
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4
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313
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Take Me Away From Here...
(Preview)
I woke up this morning in a very sad mood. Hubby had stayed up all night with his bottle and online poker game, came to bed around 8 a.m. Last night I had gone to bed with the words "I'll be up soon" from him, I tossed the ball for our dog in the bedroom a few times and told her I bet she'd love to go to...
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kismetstrand
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7
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347
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Medical update
(Preview)
Hello all, quick note to update what has happened with the Doc appointments. My MRI results were negative well ... negative to them positive to me. No lesions or other signs of MS HURRAY! BOO on the fact that leaves them baffled as to why I have so many MS symptoms but no lesions or plaque as they call it. So...
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Jennifer
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4
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256
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Forgiveness
(Preview)
Today, I talked to my A. I hadn't talked to him in awhile. Told him I needed sometime to work on me. I think he was reseptive to that. I have to focus on me and find my inner beauty or what I call my angeleyes. With everything going on in my life right now I don't have alot of energy to focus on the us thing. Before...
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angeleyes8462
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4
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350
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So hurt
(Preview)
I am so hurt. he went in treatment last month, has not be able to be sober 30 days. I saw him today and he was not sober. I am so hurt, I want to believe that we can and will get sober. He is living alone now, not with me. It hurts so bad to see him like that.
I have been married to him about 30 years, I feel so stupid...
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tootired
|
13
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473
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"I'm doing the best I can"
(Preview)
((((everyone))))
I feel like making a sign and wearing it around my neck that says... "I'm doing the best I can..."
My feelings towards my AW have wavered between irritation to sadness for her. She doesn't want me working a program, but she wants me fixed. Right now. (Or back t...
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rtexas
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8
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535
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UPDATE - but I'm still cool ...
(Preview)
He removed the battery from my car this morning, so I had to find another way to work. He's a mechanic and it's kinda scary what he could do. In a fit of anger during a drunken episode once, long ago, he threatened to 'fix my breaks'. Funny - I just remembered that now. How easily...
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HadEnuff
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9
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452
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Turning Dragons into Caterpillars
(Preview)
Ok, so I am sitting here right now taking a quick break from some homework. I am reading a chapter on "converting change into opportunity." While I am a tad restless since the school year is almost at a close, this really had me glued to it. I thought of all the dragons I have battled against in my...
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buzzfree
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5
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337
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Reflecting on how it was
(Preview)
I know in many of my posts I have made my husband seem like an uncaring monster. Sometimes he does seem that way, now, but not in the past.
From the day I met him, part of me knew that the connection he had with his parents was not "normal". I love my Mom anda Dad with all my heart, but I have never been obsesse...
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Jeannie
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10
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419
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WOW - An Epiphany for ME!
(Preview)
First of all - thank you for those of you who have taken time to respond to my cries for help! Thank you for helping me to see what was blocking me from my higher power!
I have had an epiphany and I need to share this:
Last night after almost 2 weeks with no proper sleep, I told him that it was over.&n...
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HadEnuff
|
9
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496
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Buzzfree is smokefree!!!
(Preview)
Day 17 and counting. Great! Congratulations! I had to make a big deal out of this. It deserves a separate post.
Good luck, Diva
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Diva
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13
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493
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Progress report
(Preview)
Mountain biking with my sister in law. Wednesday night is our night. I kick off work at 4:30 and head home. I get changed , load up my bike and we meet in the woods. I lead and she follows. Speeding through the woods. It is singletrack, narrow and winding. Steep climbs, dangerous descents, roots rocks, ou...
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megan
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12
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410
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I have to learn to react quicker
(Preview)
I got in the door for my lunch break right after A husband got home from work. I call him earlier today to let him know our son has a friend over and he'll be spending the night. We talked about dinner and decided to get pizza. After I walked in the door I suggested eating dinner at the pizza parlor. Of course h...
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Barbara
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1
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280
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4th step meditation
(Preview)
So many of you recently have expressed anxiety, frustration, or just general concern over the 4th step (doing it perfectly, doing it thouroughly, doing it at all) that today's Hazelden Meditation was just too good not to post for y'all. I fully agree with this message--too many people get wra...
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Tiger2006
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3
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413
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