The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
things get better if i open my mind the real understasnding,Of where I was and where I am now.I have found in my Iife I took things way to personal always want to have approval for I never was good eough as a child to my mom.All I was was in the way.Her focus was on what my father was doing and not...she did not have a program.So the insanity went on and on.Well I married with the same behavior and I went to alanon and learned wow I was starting to live a life I did not like in my mom.Greatful i walked in those doors and I look back at how many tears and emotions I had to deal with to set them free.today I am very senitive but that is not a bad thing..so what i cry over sad moves.I feel what others are or have gone through .Feelings, not all the same situation.but to me the feelings are very simular.Anger fear and so farth.Alanon gave me choices,I realy did not realiz that most of my life was based on the choices i was about to make or had made.That I choosen to stay in a abusive marrage.Even though I did not want to get hit....I wanted something he could not give me and that was love approval and all the things many may see in them selves.I was lacking confidence to change the bad in my life.Alanon gave me something I never knew I was missing let alone have.Self respect..I learned choices were about to take place and I was fearful of the unknown what would come out of a choice i made.I had ask God to help me and guide me and left the abusive relationship with my first husband.big choice.I had support my home group in alanon was there to encourage me and my sponcer would guide me deeper to think of the steps I needed to make.The 12steps have made my life manageble again,I married another A and this time I was brave and stood up for me and said no I will not go through this again.We seperated I kept going to my meetings I needed the suport as always.We worked things out and he went in rehab ,has not had a drink for 23 years.We raised 6 children together.My kids were in alateen and I was even a alateen sponcer.best experence i ever had.Today i am a Nana of 11 grandchildren.3 out of 6 kids that are all adults today are drinking or using.It became different to me in alanon I felt being my children having this dease going on within them.but it was not different just the situation not the feelings.Had to apply all the steps traditions concepts and even the slogans today as I did long ago, 27 years ago 28 in august.Meetings this program even the AA open meetings sober funtions like dances fun raisers alateens has opened away of life for me .I call this program my life line.We once had a skit at our home groups aniverary.We sang a song .Heard it thru the grape vine theme.do not recall all the words but it went "heard it thru the life line that I was about to loose my mind "honey honey ya .Life line meaning alanon.Those of you that took the time to read my share.I am greatful you have.I worked alanon and it worked for me I still am a member and I will be until I I go home(die)alanon saved my life.Deeper than this share.Tell all would be very long do not want to take to much of your time *winkNewcomers I would strongly suggest go to meetings if you can and get a sponcer work the program you are worth it.The feelings are hard at times but acceptance goes along way.love in recovery angel/sharon
Dear angel, Thank you for your witness to this Program. Your hope for newcomers is mine, as well. While I have had to learn to live with my feelings, I now also know they are about me, and that has given me self esteem. Blessings to you! mebjk
It seems I am a step behind you and approaching fast. I have been to f2f on and off over 20 yrs, got some but not enough. Doesn't look like there ever will be. Not "NEW" to those kind .
From what I have been told since I found this online site some weeks back, I am now a "NEWBIE". Jeesh.....What confusion that can lead to for me and probably others. Especially the ones that aren't aware of that, as I wasn't til was told after I asked. And seemingly because of this have felt as if some percieve me to be altogether new to AlAnon and 12 steps, and some of whats shared seems to come across as if I am being percieved as "NEW" instead of "NEWBIE". What a dilema ! And sometimes it feels discounting to me. Not sure how to deal with the situations that come from that. I am unable in my current situation (no car, no transit, relocated to unknown area due to Hurricane Katrina, etc.) to access that opportunity for f2f and thought when I found online, that could make due til situation changes. Talk about added misunderstandings !!! Thought I'd share that in here with a response to your AWSOME POST.
I am not able to access the meeting here or chat anymore as I asked a polite question about where to find info on the site under a guest ID # and instead of an answer am now blocked without access to the room at all, cant even get the support of observing a mtg and what might help me in my horribly upsetting situation. Don't know who can help me with it and don't want to cause problems trying to find out.Anyways................
You seem to be a very wise, courageous, strong, caring and insiteful person. I am so glad and greatful to have the opportunity to read your share.
With Loads of Blessings , Your Sister in Recovery
-- Edited by d53sjurne at 20:37, 2006-04-22
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I tell myself when times are rough, "this to shall pass!!!" Ask HP for guidance, if the door is open, and I know how to look, I will become aware! I also visit http://www.inspiringthots.net/ . Blessings , Your sister in Recovery
