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Challenging
(Preview)
Hello fellow members. I was just sitting here going through the message board and I thought.. I should post my latest thought... Not sure that this will make sense but, I will give it a shot. So, for whatever reason, many of us are attracted to A's, having said that is it best to be with an A wh...
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Newbie
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4
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272
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Thinking out loud
(Preview)
I have been thinking a lot lately about why I tolerated this crap for so long. I keep thinking it seems like the insanity is what kept us together and blinded me to the reality. I look at him now and all I see is a pitiful excuse for a man. So scared and insecure and needy and it makes me sic...
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carolinagirl
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6
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409
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When a Man Loves a Woman
(Preview)
Hi (((((Everyone))))))
Had a little thread of events happen to me over the weekend that I wanted to share about. The thread began last Thursday night at one of my face to face meetings that I attend weekly. There was a new gentleman that joined us at the meeting. He shared with us that the reason he wa...
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david62
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21
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3271
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words to live by....
(Preview)
all of the image squares are supposed to be bouquets. Have a great day all Life is all about ass
your either covering it,
laughing it off.
kicking it
kissing it
busting it,
trying to get a piece of it,
behaving like one,
or you live with one!!!!!  ...
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elzbeth
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0
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286
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Why can't I just let go?
(Preview)
My A has been with me either at my house or in the car every day since he's been back. Today he was supposed to go talk to his old boss about a job which he could start tomorrow if he wanted. Boss calls my cell at 10:15 asking if I've seen him is he coming bla bla bla. Here's the kicker...I fe...
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carolinagirl
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8
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488
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Constant State of Panic Attack?
(Preview)
Does anyone else feel like they are in a constant state of panic? Not that I have anything to fear but just feel the stomach churning heart rate increasing panic feeling for no particular reason?
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carolinagirl
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7
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575
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Long overdue update
(Preview)
Hi, I thought I would come in and give you all an overdue update on what is going on in my life. Especially since being here is why I have managed to maintain a peaceful life. Not always without stress or messes, but always peaceful. (I learned that here)
The long awaited homecoming of my son is j...
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doxie
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7
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458
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Left something out
(Preview)
I just read my post from this morning and it just shows how stressed and sad I am....forgot to mention that on top of everything else that's been going on with my brothers death, yesterday my mom called to say my cousin was killed in a wreck yesterday morning. I told her that I am so tired of all of thi...
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tishrijo
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4
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273
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I am terrified, I just found a lump.
(Preview)
Hi all,
I was just sitting here getting ready to go to bed and I had an itch so I scratched it. And I felt a lump in my breast, I just got scared. It is almost midnight here, so way to late to do anything about it today. I know my grandmother has a history of benign tumors.
I am trying not to freak out, but my hu...
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Dolphin123
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20
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453
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Guess what?
(Preview)
So I have applied for four jobs. Two last week and two this morning. My heart not really in it until I got a call back from one applied for this morning. Office assistant, 30 minutes closer to home then my last job and it offers benefits! I go in at 2pm tomorrow. Say a small...
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marmare
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11
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375
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Personalizing Recovery
(Preview)
Dear Roomies,
One of the important steps forward that I have made recently in my recovery, is to personalize my recovery. I have been focusing on these kinds of questions: what are my struggles? what does recovery mean to me? if I were to see improvement in X area of my life, what would I see?
T...
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BlueCloud
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6
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388
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How do you deal with an alcoholic that doesn't drink?
(Preview)
Hi....it's me again. Long time absent, trying to deal with things, trying to separate from her issues, becoming optimistic, being disappointed....becoming realistic....?
My a partner hasn't had a drink to my knowledge since April when she was arrested at our home. Being the naive ingenue that...
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Mike5056
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11
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587
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Transcript Take II!
(Preview)
Okay, I have somehow deleted my post! I'm such the computer geek - NOT! lol
There was a segment on Morning Edition which is the NPR morning radio program. There was commentary by Judy Miller on Foley and Alcoholism. I purchased the transcript of it. The very last paragraph of it asks the question: h...
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Karilynn
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0
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345
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Remind me I'm going to be okay
(Preview)
So, I need y'all to remind me I'm going to be okay. More than okay. I'm going to be just fine.
These past two weeks I've had migrane after migrane after migrane. And they've been debilitating to the point that I've missed class after class after class. So on my sponsor's encouragement, I...
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Tiger2006
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15
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542
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go find an alcoholic
(Preview)
a friend in one of my meetings has always said that if you don't have an a in your life go get one because this program is worth it. she says grab one off the street, or from a bar just get one to qualify and the miricles will begin. i always thought no way! if i could have avoided growing up in an a home and marryi...
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serendipity
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5
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468
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Calm then guilty...
(Preview)
((Hi everyone))
Well, after listening to AH last night after he came home again drunk about how:
1. He has stuck with me through the "fat years" (I just lost 30 pounds this year-stress LOL), how come I can't stick with him through his drinking;
2. He has had a plan that he would...
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hersh
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7
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493
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Letting go
(Preview)
I have been learning many things about me on this wonderful journey. But I guess the thing I have learned most recent is that I deserve to be happy. Lately when I had been talking to my A he would say one thing and do another. I know typical behavior but.. it made me start thinking do I really want to put up wit...
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DoN4me
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6
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327
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Is this Alanon's belief?
(Preview)
Someone in Alanon has been telling me I must do God's will. Is this true? I was thinking of starting my own business, so I could make enough money to support my children and myself. I was told that it will not work unless it is God's will. Please help.
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kissers
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17
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392
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New Baby
(Preview)
So my newest news......
My second son was born two weeks ago. My AH was here, but had to call him about 15 times to awake him from a hangover (I assume). I delivered at home, and agreed to let him stay here for his 7 day vacation from work to be with the baby. He cut it short by telling me the day after the baby w...
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ohera101
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5
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284
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New! many years worth of venting!
(Preview)
Hi! I am new to this site but have wanted to join al-anon for many years but was too busy dealing with all of the A's in my life. I grew up with a functioning alcoholic mom who at least maintained a "normal" life until the only sane person in my family died (my step-father.) after he passed my life we...
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Irishgirl
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4
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368
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double binds
(Preview)
I work in two different locations. In one of them I get along pretty well with my manager. In the other I do not. I think I have coped with these issues in the past on obsessing when can I leave or on how unhappy I am. The manager of one of the locations is furious at me because I called in sick once...
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maresie2
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5
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282
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doing good
(Preview)
In a month I will be here two years. I have learned alot in the two years. I have learned that his drinking and drugs are not my fault, there is nothing I can do to make him do it. I have learn the importance of friends, I have found alot of friends in the program and out of the program. I have learn not to isloted...
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nycbt
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5
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308
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another update...
(Preview)
Hello
My A/CH husband has been out of the house for 1 week. The first night he spent with a friend. The next day, his brother-in-law convinced him to go into the hospital for a few days. He checked himself right back out a couple days later.
He had an opportunity to stay with his sister and her husband....
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artygirl
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4
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413
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Is it wrong to feel hatred for pedophiles?
(Preview)
I can usually sense a pedophile when I come into contact with them. I guess it is intuition. I feel absolute hatred whenever in their presence. Now, I am being told that my feelings of hatred are wrong and that they are to be pitied. For the life of me, I cannot get rid of these feelings. Maybe it's because I...
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kissers
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10
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494
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the excuse of rehab
(Preview)
First Senator Teddy Kennedy, then Mel Gibson and Robin Williams and now Congressman Mark Foley......Three high profile individuals who have gone to rehab and faced public scrutiny. In my opinion, it is a "trend" now to blame one's possible or confirmed alcoholism and commit to rehab to make...
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omajoy
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5
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419
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Being AA in Alanon
(Preview)
I have been a regular in f2f Alanon for a while now, and I've been sober in AA for about twice as long. I feel I am accepted equally in both programs, and I know a number of people who belong to both.
I credit my childhood exposure to Alanon with some advance knowledge of where to go when I had enough of my o...
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barisax
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17
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579
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I am me
(Preview)
I am a daughter, sister, foster mother, stepmother, loving partner, auntie, proud pet owner, gardener, cook, writer, lover, fighter of injustices, employee, an out and proud lesbian and on and on and on.
I need to remember all of these things. I am also extremely qualified fo...
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lilms
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7
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351
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Group Business Meeting
(Preview)
Group Business Meeting tonite at 7PM et in the chat room. Please join us.
Agenda:
Need for Ops to fill meeting schedule.
Report on Meetimg Topic List.
Report on Newcomers Meeting.
Love in Recovery and Service - Dot
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dot
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1
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295
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NEED ADVICE. Thank you
(Preview)
What do I do? I find my self trapped in a horrible life. My next door neighbors called the police on my Abf and he got a 2nd DUI, now mind you my neighbors are scum bags but if my A hadn’t been drinking and blew a 2.08 he wouldn’t have gotten a DUI. Now this was a year ago my A started drinking...
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kingston
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15
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578
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Angry/Resentful towards A's sobriety
(Preview)
I've not been around for quite some time due to a move out of state, getting internet set up, finding a job, etc. Happy to say that my boys and I have a roof over our heads (although we share it with my mother - an A herself). I also found a fantastic job that I love (9-1-1 Dispatcher) and have sta...
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Akasha
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6
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503
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Slice of life lightly toasted
(Preview)
Okay,
I really am being a nutjob today. Hope some of you are enjoying my wacky humour. I will quit now I promise. The stuff in paranthesis is mine ( )
lilms
1. Does a clean house indicate there is a broken computer in it? (Yep, my house)
2. Why is it that no matter wha...
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lilms
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3
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291
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Some people have no compassion
(Preview)
Today I had to tell my boss about my back surgery, and that I need 4-6 weeks recovery time. I have worked for him for 20 years. The jerk has all the compassion of a dead trout. He told me that I have to find someone to cover for me or I have to quit. He told me that I don't need to worry a...
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shadow1
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11
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565
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I get it, BUT
(Preview)
Okay, here is the deal. I understand that Al Anon is for me. That I have things to work on too. But, How really am I suppose to take all of this. We spent 10 thousand dollars to send my husband to rehab. The first week he is out he relapses, goes on a rampage and accuses me of a...
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curious
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8
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572
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The benefits of pausing and observing
(Preview)
((Hello group))
It has been a topsy turvy few days that started Friday evening. I got home and my neighbor told me that a certified letter was waiting for me from my condo association to say that I had 10 days to pay any back maintenance fees or they'd put a lien on my condo. Well, I realized...
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twinmom2
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2
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508
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A very sad week
(Preview)
Lots has happened since I last posted. First I want to start with the positive stuff. I thought very hard about my marriage and decided I didn't want to give up yet. I asked my H to stay and give us another chance.
Now the sad, Tuesday I got a call that my 31 year old A brother was killed...
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tishrijo
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9
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342
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question about recovery
(Preview)
I have been going to face to face meetings for about 6 months now..I am trying to work my program and I do see changes. But I was wondering has anyone had problems when you start to recover in dealing with the A in your life? My A is sober and has been but at best he is not actively working a progra...
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rxygrl
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7
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356
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I find myself in a strange place...
(Preview)
((((Everyone))))
Leading up to this weekend I had many thoughts going through my mind. As with other times when my AW would propose seperation I would get so nervious and anxious. Why?
Because I love the way this is going? No...
Because I am afraid of what the kids will say? N...
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rtexas
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8
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459
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feel like someone should reprimand me
(Preview)
my ex ah has been hanging around my house alot and he and i have gone out a few times to dinner and movie. i haven't "slipped" intimatly with him since that one time on labor day. but i have fallen back into "our pattern". he acts a certain way when getting sober in aa and i know what to do. i did it for 12 years. i...
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serendipity
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4
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441
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A Break from the Drinking, to write this...
(Preview)
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afmom03
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3
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370
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here we go again...
(Preview)
I sit here, completely exhausted from my day. My husband is out smoking crack again. Who knows where. My emotions have gone from not caring to crazy rages on his cell phone voice mail, to calming down and reading my kids a book to help them sleep. Now I have logged on here, if for nothing else to keep me focu...
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MSKM301
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4
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286
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Holding the Lords Hand tightly
(Preview)
Hello Dear Friends,
My life has taken a total change, some things by choice, and in many ways just were no alternative avenues to take.
I have heard from my so called husband, he is in detox, he is in for a big reality check when he gets out, I am saleing his car today, no one has the right to be on the r...
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Andrea12
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13
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445
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Feeling slick
(Preview)
I was talking to my A today when he called to see if he could come over and if I would give him some gas money...could I come by and get him so he could see the kids and take him home...
I told him no I don't want him over every day (seems like that would defeat the purpose of moving) BUT I did say I was thinking ab...
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carolinagirl
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3
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280
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What am I doing?
(Preview)
I know all the healthy ways to take care of me.....I know all the phrases to help me stay healthy. I know being honest about my feelings is a good thing when my A is sober. Then why do I keep trying to explain to him how left out of his life I am. Why do I keep going in circles. He truly...
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marmare
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8
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476
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Hmmmmmmm too much alanon?
(Preview)
(((Hi all))),
Ok this was weird and funny so I wanted to share it.
Last night I was dreaming. I was trying to find an oyster burried in a shrimp. (yes strange, but hey it's me). While I was hunting for it I felt the tingle of my body trying to wake me up because I had to go to the restroom. Well in my deam I tol...
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Dolphin123
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10
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482
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Normal
(Preview)
Hi all,
Was getting some stuff ready for work today and came across this. It seems that so many of us are looking for normal (whatever the heck that is).
Well today I opened my email at work and found the answer.
Normal is a setting on your washing machine. Thank goodness now I c...
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lilms
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3
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263
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Finding me again -- Wooohooo!
(Preview)
Okay -- I'm riding the "pink cloud" and it is soooo wonderful. Thank you thank you for all your replies, they have helped so much. Today, I did what was good for me!
The A came to fix the riding mower and all I could do was think about the other week when he asked me to help him lift it up&...
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Lunamoth
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8
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455
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FEELING ANGER IN CHAT ROOM
(Preview)
Hi
I don't really know what to say, only that for the first time in chat today, I was left feeling really angry. I am still a newbie to this and I don't know all the rules yet. Today a person came into chat room, stating he was 21 and looking for insight. I was listening to him, when I noticed a difference in t...
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ally
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6
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530
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zoloft - did it help?
(Preview)
how long were you on? were you able to stop? any side effects when first going on? doc just started me on 50mg, wants me to call him after a month
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Barbara
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5
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442
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Confused about being humble
(Preview)
I looked up the definition of humble and one of the definitions is to not be assertive. This makes no sense to me. This seems to teach that you are not to ask for what you need or want, but to settle for what comes your way.....which has always been crumbs. Don't we all have a right to assert ourselves? We may...
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kissers
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6
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1024
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stranded and hopeless
(Preview)
Hello ((everyone))
I wrote a little bit about my situation in my last post, but not about whats going on at the present. 2 weeks ago me and my Ab came to my home town to visit my family. I begged him to stay home and let me come alone because he is drinking and using. He wouldn't hear of it.. he s...
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rainydayz
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11
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517
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dealing with what's real
(Preview)
HI ala-pals,
My counselor asked me to do some homework... so I hope you don't mind if I use this board to work on it.
I have been working on accepting that my relationship with my father is not ever going to be what I want it to be. After two years of wondering why -- why is he acting so cold, so insensitive...
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itsgot2bgd
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3
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387
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Update on carolinagirl...
(Preview)
Hi all,
Just wanted to give an update with my progress in dealing with my A. He returned to town Friday afternoon and came straight to my house. Called about 3 hours before showing up saying he was stuck in a town 45 mins. away with no gas bla bla bla and I told him he'd figure it out. He...
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carolinagirl
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2
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304
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resent my A
(Preview)
I just wanted to vent here. My A left AA and started drinking again. I am the only one of us working a program any longer. I try and be patient. It is very very very hard for me sometimes. He will be testy and ill tempered all day and then I finally reach my breaking point. The only time I seem to be happy is when I...
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tippergirl
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5
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387
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A lie believed becomes the truth?
(Preview)
While visiting with a long time girlfriend, we started talking about negative thinking. Negative thinking about ourselves. We were both raised in alcoholic families and can really relate to each other on this subject. She was talking about how her dad would call them stupid wh...
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greta
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4
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446
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It's me again!
(Preview)
Hello ((everyone))
I am looking for f2f meetings in my area to attend but it seems they are scarce...any suggestions how to find meetings in my area? I am going to do this for myself. I also want to start the steps but I'm not sure how.
I know I need to take care of me.. I do, and I unde...
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rainydayz
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4
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282
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a memo from HP
(Preview)
To: YOU
Date: TODAY
From: GOD
Subject: YOURSELF
Reference: LIFE
This is God. Today I will be handling All of your problems for you. I do Not need your help. So, have a nice day. I love you.
P.S. And, remember...
If life happens to deliver a situation to you that you cannot handle, do No...
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Maria123
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6
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310
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Miracles In Progress Cookbook
(Preview)
Hello everyone,
This is Rose, From time to time I have been in the rooms and I have found that people are talking about food. Who is cooking what, oh let me have that recipe, Oh that sounds good. All it does is make everyone hungry!! So I have decided to put all this food talk to...
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John
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26
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2553
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yoga? pilates?
(Preview)
does anyone take classes w/either yoga or pilates? Thinking of joining a new gym and they offer both
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Barbara
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3
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308
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dealing with the blips in the road
(Preview)
As you all know I have a job, albeit a part time job that is sometimes full time when they have no one else to do it. I hate it that I am not in a position to turn down work there yet. I am looking very very hard for something else but I am human and I can only move at a certain pace. I am also decl...
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maresie2
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4
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329
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dry A wants kids allowence
(Preview)
Well I think ive got one for you. My dry A who isnt working says that will do the dishes and dust in return if I pay my A the 3.00 I give my daughter for allowence.
Which my daughter does a lot more then that as im sick and she has helped me daily.
Yeah we know kids do miss things when there doing chores but the...
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purplebutterfly
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3
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360
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