The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I really am being a nutjob today. Hope some of you are enjoying my wacky humour. I will quit now I promise. The stuff in paranthesis is mine ( )
lilms
1. Does a clean house indicate there is a broken computer in it? (Yep, my house)
2. Why is it that no matter what colour of bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?
3. Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?
4. Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized? (My wife does this every day, lol)
5. On electric toasters, why do they engrave the message "one slice"? How many pieces of bread do they think people are really gonna try to stuff in that slot?
6. Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance? (This would be me)
7. Why is it that no plastic garbage bag will open from the end you first try?
8. How do those dead bugs get into those closed light fixtures? (Someone I hope has the answer to this)
9. Considering all the lint you get in your dryer, if you kept drying your clothes would they eventually just disappear?
10. When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, "It's all right"? Well, it isn't all right so why don't we say, "That hurt!"
11. Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?
12. Is it true that the only difference between a yard sale and a garbage collection is how close to the road the stuff is placed?
13. In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?
14. How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?
15. If at first you don't succeed, shouldn't you try doing it the way your wife told you to do it? And obviously if at first you don't succeed, then don't take up skydiving!
16. The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four North Americans is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends; if they're okay, then it's you.(This again would be me, the nutjob )
-- Edited by lilms at 19:59, 2006-10-03
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Two things: 1. Recovery is a process, not an event.....and.... 2. You only get to go around once. Leave em laughing and make it worth your while
)
