The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Okay -- I'm riding the "pink cloud" and it is soooo wonderful. Thank you thank you for all your replies, they have helped so much. Today, I did what was good for me!
The A came to fix the riding mower and all I could do was think about the other week when he asked me to help him lift it up onto the picnic table (like I said before, long story) ..... and I DID. Oh how I'm laughing. Today I've smiled the whole day and laughed at myself in a good way. Because today I'm getting healthy. I feel beautiful inside and out and it isn't because of anyone else.
I didn't participate in the dance so the A left after a couple of hours. I went in, no kids, and thought "What am I going to do?" -- I thought about making some calls, going shopping but then I thought no, I'm going to spend a little time w/ me. I turned up the radio, cooked a great stir fry w/ Basmati rice and danced.
OMG, I just had someone ask me if I've been drinking. LOL You can't get this feeling in a bottle. I've finally got part of me back, the part that has always enjoyed doing things on my own. I'm grateful to my HP for this day.
Thank you again, my last post I had to remove the word "stupid" several times before I posted it, I felt like I was going to repeat all the things that I tend to do that keeps this crazy dance going. Only this time I didn't ... I celebrate that.
Today I had time to catch up on my sleep and regroup and post and focus on a few issues. I am still so so backlogged on lots of tasks. I also had time to feel a little better after having had a terrible bout of allergies and feeling really ill.
I am so glad to hear that you did not particpate in the dance and then took care of yourself so well. Taking care of myself is a big blank to me most days I always feel I miss out huge elements of it
I know how that felt!! I love to dance but my AH has no rythym so he doesn't like to dance (except slow dance).So I usually feel silly dancing when he's around. I love to blast the music and dance when he is gone.It's great exercise and I get back in contact with ME.