Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

looking_for_peace · looking_for_peace

Background: -I told my AH to leave 4 weeks ago. -He finally "got it" about 2 weeks ago and went to stay with at his parents camp. -This week he calls to tell me he is getting an apartment. When I agreed I think he was very surprised. -I have spent this week like a load has been removed from my shou...

shimo · shimo

I am unable to chair my regularly scheduled meeting Monday morning as I have tests at the hospital and will not be able to return home in time to chair. Hoping someone may be able to step up for me. Love in recovery, Shimo (aka Jeri)

Tattyhead · Tattyhead

Hi! I have just come back from a week-long conference. I had a brilliant time - took my son with me and he really relaxed for the 1st time in ages. He was issued with his own "guest" badge of which he was so proud. AH answered the phone to us twice a day (I had threatened to send the police round if...

Hopeless · Hopeless

In a previous post I stated that I talked to the A in regards to seeing his daughter... Per my PFA order he is to get supervised visitation and give me $150 in child support.. When I came home I noticed he didn't leave me anything so I questioned him about this and he stated that he could only give me $75...

Priscilla83 · Priscilla83

Last time I posted I explained how my Ahusband(we're aeparated) was moving and buying my dream dog just to manipulate me. Well, he called and told me he was sending me pictures of dogs and bla bla. I asked are you buying us (us meaning me and Bianca) a dog? He replied No, I'm buying a dog for myself Ughhh I t...

RunnerChick · RunnerChick

I am visiting my old roommate this weekend who I have not seen for years. I am feeling that nervousness again - that I won't be accepted, I'll be judged. THis morning I read the Thought for Today from Hazelden and it was a reminder that I need not let the "old" feelings of codpendency and recove...

Aloha · Aloha

I'm being asked to step in and take on a role of responsibility for something that truly is not my responsibility. It is a situation, however, where it may be for the good of someone. I don't want to go into the details of the situation here (saving that for my sponsor.) Ahh... the Al-Anon in me wants to say...

Hopeless · Hopeless

Has anyone ever brought their A to an Al-Anon Meeting? If so what type of reaction did the A have?

Tracy · Tracy

My ABF has come out of a three week relapse. He has lots of consequences to face. Owes £1,500. Lost best friend, kids have detached from him, his mum is really depressed and I can not have a relationship I can see I am very sick too. We have had odd chat and he is really working the programme. He has foun...

China · China

Hello, I think that I am better as the time goes on. I finally think that i can move on. My ex A still around, but he does not affect me as before. Now I have the choice to tell him to leave the house whenever i feel that it is getting to me. I still have issues like insecurities. No one will think that about me sin...

pineapple · pineapple

The good news is that AH hasn't been drinking for over two months now. But we seem to be having trouble adjusting to the whole situation of him being sober. I want him to make some decisions as I'm tired of making all the decisions for the last year. He has a lot of projects and things going on, but when it co...

Courage · Courage

Agenda Meeting opening with "The Serenity Prayer"First Item: April Meeting Minutes Next Item: Review of Op meeting schedule -The current OP Meeting Schedule is as follows:AMMon. - Shimo/No altTues. - Doxie/No altWed. - Iona/No altThurs. - Doxie/No altFri. - Blendergirl/No altSat....

Hopeless · Hopeless

A is a social drinker NEVER drinks at home only at bars... With that being said we have eliminated supervised visits (it was causing more problems, etc)... He is staying at a mutual friends house right now and with the help of my sister she is going to drop and pick up my daughter... The family...

Hopeless · Hopeless

I just fought with myself for an hour on whether I should post this or not = / But.... I realize that I needed support especially from people that know what I'm talking about! I miss my 5 days of having a "normal" family.... Basically my life was based on a weekend of binging from th...

canadianguy · canadianguy

The recent posts about the effects of 'pot' versus 'alcohol', remind me of others that have been debated on here in prior times..... Some examples: hard liquor vs. beer having an A spouse vs. having an A child vs. having an A parent binge users vs. everyday users alcohol vs. other drugs etc, etc.... I b...

daisygirl · daisygirl

After I left his house this morning, I got a text that said, "You mean the world to me can, we talk after work don't want to end this way" He said he was sorry for avoiding me, he was mad and was wrong for hurting me...he didn't want to hurt me. He said he has been struggling with things and would...

FuzzyLogic · FuzzyLogic

My ABF went to the doctor this week. Doc agreed with me and ordered tests to verify that ABF has most likely been suffering TIA's (mini strokes). He then proceeded to give him the death lecture and remind him of all the patients he has lost to this disease called alcholism. Bloated livers, failing organ...

ythannah · ythannah

Didn't want to hijack Hopeless's thread with my own question, so I'm putting it in a separate thread. I realize that I will need to do work with a sponsor to make real progress in my own recovery. Is it best to choose a sponsor from your home group? I ask because my home group is tiny (sometimes only 3 of us...

Destynee · Destynee

My H came home drunk early Sunday morning and just verbally abusive. I told him he couldn't come in so he slept in his truck. About 8 AM sunday he came in and was so verbally abusive to me. The name calling, etc was horrible and in front of my 3 and 1 year old. He ended up punching me in the head and stomach. ...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Is our SHADOW! Happy birthday Shadow.....love ya girl!

daisygirl · daisygirl

Well, I had not heard from him in 35 hours. Had not returned my text or calls. Unlike him unless he is out drinking. So, worried and concerned I stopped by his house on my way to work to make sure he was alright and to get a better understanding of what is going on. Of course he went out Tuesday night (h...

daisygirl · daisygirl

I had ended things with my 41year old ABF and I just couldn't stop thinking of him. I missed him and worried about him drinking. I became a stalker again... making sure he was alright. He is having construction business whoas and with our break up, I worried about him drinking. This past Saturday, a...

Rose · Rose

Why do I start fights with my AH when he hasn't done anything. I have anticipated anxiety about mothers day. Every year I look forward to it only to be let down. He doesn't drink on Mothers Day or my birthday or anyday celebrating 'me' but the days before. And I of course am still upset when it comes to...

Love Always Hopes · Love Always Hopes

First, it's been at least two weeks since I last posted which considering how often it seemed to be that the day ended with me bawling over the keyboard, that feels like progress! Actually, the progress is just knowing that I have gone from not being able to function anywhere doing anything because I w...

miralake · miralake

Hi everyone. I've been with my husband for 15 years and he was an alcoholic for 14 of those years. He stopped drinking a year ago and is committed to never starting up again, which I was eternally grateful for, for about 20 minutes, until he simply replaced alcohol with pot. He now does all the same things...

lyndebi · lyndebi

major surgery tore tendon off humerus. should not be home.oscar died.He could not stand. I am in horrible pain.hard to feed me

buick23 · buick23

I am having a bad day and noone to talk to. I know these days pass and I'm feeling sorry for myself. Everything I think about today seems to be negative. There are issues that didn't just start bothering me today but I guess I'm just overwhelmed with all the negative right now. One of those black and white t...

Tracy · Tracy

My ABF and I have been chatting he is back in AA after his last slip which nearly took him to suicide. I have been running from him so scared not wanting any part not wanting to rescue to enable to watch what was happening. He has been chasing me since he has got back on the programme. Says he now knows how muc...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

The one and only Karilynn!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Happy Birthday sweet lady! May your day be full of many blessings. Yours in recovery, Mandy

Dog_ma · Dog_ma

It's a long story, but I'll try to give you all the Cliff notes version. Spent three years with ABF, the last year was us trying to break up. Finally in Aug. 09 I put an end to the roller coaster and the relationship. No contact. Finally I meet a new guy and we hit it off very well. He abandones the relatio...

drucilla06 · drucilla06

Just finished watching the movie.."When Love is not Enough"..the story of Lois Wilson.I teared up during the movie,but not until he got sober.After it was over,I cried the 'ugly' cry as Oprah calls it, lol. I identified with her sometimes.I saw as never before the way I had totally given u...

lizzakiss · lizzakiss

I could use some advice, stories, experience....whatever you're willing to give! I've known my Abf-sober for just about 3 years now, however, I've only "known" him as a dry drunk. I'm thankful that I didn't have to do the binges, blackouts and blowouts that I read on this site daily and my...

Nolaprincess · Nolaprincess

Hello everyone - I am new to the forum although not new to Al-Anon. I have been in a long term marriage with an A who has been sober for a very long time. He has some serious issues through which I have been able to maintain sanity and sometimes serenity by keeping the focus on myself. Lately, I am having...

Sweet Stanley · Sweet Stanley

When I was at the family week at rehab for my AH, the counselors were talking about us family members and made a statement about us being "f.i.n.e. " and each letter stood for something. Do any of you know what they stand for, I can't remember? I really wanted to write them down to remind me.....

glad · glad

For 4 years (just recently with the dad (69( and 21 year old "girlfriend")motocycle dirt bike racing- my 4 years of participation every other weekend I have noticed it is very typical for any girlfriend/ wife- female watching the rider race to wear a jersy with the rider's number...

lyndebi · lyndebi

Some of you are concerned about your kids. I was talking to my daughter, now 35 almost, about how her brother 34 almost is so anxiety ridden. He worries about things that are 2 years away. Worries he is doing all he is doing for someone to take it away.(house, jeep, boat etc.) She says to me,"Mom we ar...

dalia · dalia

Hi my name is dalia and i'm new here. i had a 9 yr relationship with an addict/alcoholic that i ended 4 years ago. he's been in recovery (aa and counselling) since then, has held the same job for 4 years. the last thing i told him was that i could not do it any more and that he owed it to himself to get treatmen...

DreamsOver · DreamsOver

It has been a terrible weekend, we had a day of strongs storms here and a friend of mine died while trying to get into her storm shelter, she fell and hit her head and it was fatal. I loved her and had known her for more than thirty years, she was a wonderful person. Another friend of mine from high school...

Priscilla83 · Priscilla83

So my husband is moving again, cause that's the solution to our separation and to his alcoholism. I told him again on Saturday that until he gets sober we are not getting back together, and even if he moves to my dream house, I'm staying put in MY house. He says that if he's gonna give me EVERYTHING why I ca...

John · John

Just watched the Hallmark movie, "When Love Isn't Enough", about Lois W. The wife of Bill W. and struggles she endured as the wife of an alcoholic and the beginnings of Al-Anon. I must admit, it put a hump in my throat more than once. What a beautiful story of love, hope, faith and reaching out to other...

jettiesgirl · jettiesgirl

Hi everyone. I've been with my alcoholic boyfriend for over 8 years. The drinking has gotten really bad over the past two years. I am also an adult child of an alcoholic (my dad). I finally kicked him out about a month ago. All of the deceit, mental and emotional abuse, abandonment, etc. I just couldn't d...

Hopeless · Hopeless

A is starting his supervised visitations with our daughter this week so I had to call and find out when he was coming (i will not be home when he comes to see her, my mother is going to supervise his visitations)... Of course he automatically started with the "i miss you", "i love y...

bucknathaniel · bucknathaniel

Hi, Once in an Alanon meeting I heard a list read of 12 to 15 ways in which an adult should behave. What is this list? Where can I find it in the literature? I would love to find this list so I can make a copy for myself and learn it. It has things like, "an adult is happy for someone instead of envious when t...

RLC · RLC

To my MIP Family, David wrote a great post on gratitude today. I just watched the Hallmark Hall of Fame movie "When Love Is Not Enough". So I've had a double dose of gratitude today. If there is anyone in the family that watched the movie and did not tear-up several times then they didn't watch...

david62 · david62

Hi Family, I got home a couple of hours ago from the small conference that my home group hosts every year. This was my seventh year attending and is my annual Al-Anon birthday celebration. On April 17, 2004 I attended this conference at the invitation of my then AA wife, and for that I am grateful. Grat...

Jozie · Jozie

I 1st Want to say THANK YOU to all who responded & helped lift me from my Slump Last week, every day I got on here & seen another response, it was really an uplifting part of my day, and helped carry me thru, many tears, many memories of those past... I DID Make a Meeting last night, and it was SOOOO ni...

intothewoods · intothewoods

Here's a little inspirational quote from Nelson Mandela: Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actual...

hopeforrecovery · hopeforrecovery

I'm a wife of a addict/alcoholic. We've been together for 29 years, 25 of them married. He was a drug user back in 1987, when I was pregnant with our first child. He entered rehab in 1988 and was clean for 18 years. He started using prescription drugs and when the debt piled high he turned to drinking to for...

RLC · RLC

I have been without internet service for the last two day at my business, modem problems. If someone had told me ten or twelve years ago that I would have a hard time doing without the Internet--- my Black Labs--- a microwave--- and MIP, I would have told them they were crazy. But they would have been ri...

belle1 · belle1

If the movie Love Is Not... Being Shown In The UK Or Even Online Perhaps?? Belle1x

daisygirl · daisygirl

Well, I had gone to his house the other day... but the timing was not right. Last night, he went out to the bars and I was once again left to worry and drive myself nuts. So, today he made me lunch. I went there to talk. He was certainly not prepared to hear what I had to say. I appeared strong (even thou...

maire rua · maire rua

Hi Guys, am after two punishing days, things went ok but very long. I come home to relax, and my A father rings, I have no way of knowing who is ringing, will have to get new phone and he starts complaining about why my a-brother is getting passed over for state housing, he has been passed over three times. I...

CCC12 · CCC12

Hello, I just joined this group a few moments ago because I have been "planning" to attend actual meetings but it never seems to happen with work. I am the adult child of an alcoholic mother and actually an alcoholic father as well. To keep this short she has been in rehab multiple times and...

lacewing · lacewing

The upcoming Al-Anon Message Board Meeting was to be held this Sunday, April 25th @ 9:00PM...however, due to the high volume of interest in the upcoming movie: When Love is Not Enough; The Story of Lois Wilson, we are rescheduling the Al-Anon Message Board Meeting to be held on SATURDAY, APRIL 24th @...

lyndebi · lyndebi

Who am I kidding, I am scared. Monday the 26th is the surgery on my shoulder.The tendon is torn away from the bone. Talking major stuff, drills, pins, screws....This is when I am in trouble. I can hold back the big gut pain of the lonliness and actually been lots better. But this brings me too far down. I wo...

Tracy · Tracy

Hi all, I have had a chat with my ExABF it was quite nice but hard. He has gone back to Aa and has gotten himself somewhere to live. I told him I could not have a relationship with him anymore that cared for him but I needed to focus on my recovery, life and kids. He said that he was sorry for all the pain , tha...

maresie · maresie

Today I am going to an al anon conference which isn't as near to my home as I thought. I am having to compromise. In the past, in my perfectinist thinking anything less than total immersion would be a failure. I will probably go to a few workshops and that's about it. For now that's good enough. I had no g...

RunnerChick · RunnerChick

I just wrote about this in another response to a post - but my obsessing is almost hardwired into me. It is a physical and automatic response to feeling as though I am out of control OR that abandonment or rejection may be imminent. My A and I live apart now. We had discussed that we would "Date"...

Acatnip · Acatnip

I have spent a lot of time on here posting about the disruption to my world so I think you all deserve an update since this board helped me get thru it and I am now hoping to be on the "other" side. Quick back story- At the end of Jan, I discovered my new husband was an A. He had cleverly hid it until so...

hopeforme · hopeforme

I am really glad to have found this message board! Feeling the need to share... Three months ago, after having an intervention for my bf, he agreed to go to rehab. I was so happy and relieved. He stayed for detox, but those people were "crazy losers". He was so "bored". He was &quo...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	He's still in control!!!! (sorry-long) (Preview) Background: -I told my AH to leave 4 weeks ago. -He finally "got it" about 2 weeks ago and went to stay with at his parents camp. -This week he calls to tell me he is getting an apartment. When I agreed I think he was very surprised. -I have spent this week like a load has been removed from my shou...	looking_for_peace	7	1071	May 2, 2010 by adonaisgirl
	MONDAY A.M. AL-ANON MEETING (Preview) I am unable to chair my regularly scheduled meeting Monday morning as I have tests at the hospital and will not be able to return home in time to chair. Hoping someone may be able to step up for me. Love in recovery, Shimo (aka Jeri)	shimo	1	556	May 2, 2010 by Carol_Lynn
	Heartbreaking (Preview) Hi! I have just come back from a week-long conference. I had a brilliant time - took my son with me and he really relaxed for the 1st time in ages. He was issued with his own "guest" badge of which he was so proud. AH answered the phone to us twice a day (I had threatened to send the police round if...	Tattyhead	10	972	May 2, 2010 by Tattyhead
	Give an inch and they take a mile... (Preview) In a previous post I stated that I talked to the A in regards to seeing his daughter... Per my PFA order he is to get supervised visitation and give me $150 in child support.. When I came home I noticed he didn't leave me anything so I questioned him about this and he stated that he could only give me $75...	Hopeless	5	853	May 2, 2010 by tlcate
	That whole dog ordeal (Preview) Last time I posted I explained how my Ahusband(we're aeparated) was moving and buying my dream dog just to manipulate me. Well, he called and told me he was sending me pictures of dogs and bla bla. I asked are you buying us (us meaning me and Bianca) a dog? He replied No, I'm buying a dog for myself Ughhh I t...	Priscilla83	8	793	May 2, 2010 by xeno59
	Visiting a friend... a new kind of anxiety (Preview) I am visiting my old roommate this weekend who I have not seen for years. I am feeling that nervousness again - that I won't be accepted, I'll be judged. THis morning I read the Thought for Today from Hazelden and it was a reminder that I need not let the "old" feelings of codpendency and recove...	RunnerChick	2	595	May 2, 2010 by xeno59
	Grateful Al-Anon has taught me to PAUSE (Preview) I'm being asked to step in and take on a role of responsibility for something that truly is not my responsibility. It is a situation, however, where it may be for the good of someone. I don't want to go into the details of the situation here (saving that for my sponsor.) Ahh... the Al-Anon in me wants to say...	Aloha	5	1418	May 2, 2010 by tlcate
	Bringing A to meetings (Preview) Has anyone ever brought their A to an Al-Anon Meeting? If so what type of reaction did the A have?	Hopeless	12	952	May 2, 2010 by tlcate
	I can see the disease (Preview) My ABF has come out of a three week relapse. He has lots of consequences to face. Owes £1,500. Lost best friend, kids have detached from him, his mum is really depressed and I can not have a relationship I can see I am very sick too. We have had odd chat and he is really working the programme. He has foun...	Tracy	4	1441	May 1, 2010 by Jerry F
	Feeling Better (Preview) Hello, I think that I am better as the time goes on. I finally think that i can move on. My ex A still around, but he does not affect me as before. Now I have the choice to tell him to leave the house whenever i feel that it is getting to me. I still have issues like insecurities. No one will think that about me sin...	China	3	800	May 1, 2010 by ythannah
	still adjusting (Preview) The good news is that AH hasn't been drinking for over two months now. But we seem to be having trouble adjusting to the whole situation of him being sober. I want him to make some decisions as I'm tired of making all the decisions for the last year. He has a lot of projects and things going on, but when it co...	pineapple	4	887	May 1, 2010 by RLC
	May Chat Room Group Business Meeting Agenda (Preview) Agenda Meeting opening with "The Serenity Prayer"First Item: April Meeting Minutes Next Item: Review of Op meeting schedule -The current OP Meeting Schedule is as follows:AMMon. - Shimo/No altTues. - Doxie/No altWed. - Iona/No altThurs. - Doxie/No altFri. - Blendergirl/No altSat....	Courage	0	534	May 1, 2010 by Courage
	Encouraged = ) (Preview) A is a social drinker NEVER drinks at home only at bars... With that being said we have eliminated supervised visits (it was causing more problems, etc)... He is staying at a mutual friends house right now and with the help of my sister she is going to drop and pick up my daughter... The family...	Hopeless	2	461	May 1, 2010 by sdisnie
	Support.. (Preview) I just fought with myself for an hour on whether I should post this or not = / But.... I realize that I needed support especially from people that know what I'm talking about! I miss my 5 days of having a "normal" family.... Basically my life was based on a weekend of binging from th...	Hopeless	7	891	May 1, 2010 by sdisnie
	Addiction is addiction is addiction.... (Preview) The recent posts about the effects of 'pot' versus 'alcohol', remind me of others that have been debated on here in prior times..... Some examples: hard liquor vs. beer having an A spouse vs. having an A child vs. having an A parent binge users vs. everyday users alcohol vs. other drugs etc, etc.... I b...	canadianguy	6	1518	Apr 30, 2010 by tlcate
	I mean the world to him (Preview) After I left his house this morning, I got a text that said, "You mean the world to me can, we talk after work don't want to end this way" He said he was sorry for avoiding me, he was mad and was wrong for hurting me...he didn't want to hurt me. He said he has been struggling with things and would...	daisygirl	6	855	Apr 30, 2010 by Mattie
	Detox Deadly? (Preview) My ABF went to the doctor this week. Doc agreed with me and ordered tests to verify that ABF has most likely been suffering TIA's (mini strokes). He then proceeded to give him the death lecture and remind him of all the patients he has lost to this disease called alcholism. Bloated livers, failing organ...	FuzzyLogic	10	1332	Apr 30, 2010 by FuzzyLogic
	Sponsorship Question (Preview) Didn't want to hijack Hopeless's thread with my own question, so I'm putting it in a separate thread. I realize that I will need to do work with a sponsor to make real progress in my own recovery. Is it best to choose a sponsor from your home group? I ask because my home group is tiny (sometimes only 3 of us...	ythannah	10	848	Apr 30, 2010 by ythannah
	Had to file a PFA (Preview) My H came home drunk early Sunday morning and just verbally abusive. I told him he couldn't come in so he slept in his truck. About 8 AM sunday he came in and was so verbally abusive to me. The name calling, etc was horrible and in front of my 3 and 1 year old. He ended up punching me in the head and stomach. ...	Destynee	5	904	Apr 30, 2010 by abbyal
	Today's Birthday girl............. (Preview) Is our SHADOW! Happy birthday Shadow.....love ya girl!	Mandy123	6	781	Apr 29, 2010 by Andrea12
	Had not heard from him (Preview) Well, I had not heard from him in 35 hours. Had not returned my text or calls. Unlike him unless he is out drinking. So, worried and concerned I stopped by his house on my way to work to make sure he was alright and to get a better understanding of what is going on. Of course he went out Tuesday night (h...	daisygirl	3	738	Apr 29, 2010 by Priscilla83
	once again (Preview) I had ended things with my 41year old ABF and I just couldn't stop thinking of him. I missed him and worried about him drinking. I became a stalker again... making sure he was alright. He is having construction business whoas and with our break up, I worried about him drinking. This past Saturday, a...	daisygirl	2	803	Apr 29, 2010 by Priscilla83
	Why do I do this........ (Preview) Why do I start fights with my AH when he hasn't done anything. I have anticipated anxiety about mothers day. Every year I look forward to it only to be let down. He doesn't drink on Mothers Day or my birthday or anyday celebrating 'me' but the days before. And I of course am still upset when it comes to...	Rose	10	1352	Apr 29, 2010 by Karilynn
	Thank you and More Questions (of course!) (Preview) First, it's been at least two weeks since I last posted which considering how often it seemed to be that the day ended with me bawling over the keyboard, that feels like progress! Actually, the progress is just knowing that I have gone from not being able to function anywhere doing anything because I w...	Love Always Hopes	3	799	Apr 29, 2010 by kitty
	Is this for me? (Preview) Hi everyone. I've been with my husband for 15 years and he was an alcoholic for 14 of those years. He stopped drinking a year ago and is committed to never starting up again, which I was eternally grateful for, for about 20 minutes, until he simply replaced alcohol with pot. He now does all the same things...	miralake	13	1025	Apr 28, 2010 by ythannah
	diva (Preview) major surgery tore tendon off humerus. should not be home.oscar died.He could not stand. I am in horrible pain.hard to feed me	lyndebi	8	839	Apr 28, 2010 by maire rua
	having a bad day (Preview) I am having a bad day and noone to talk to. I know these days pass and I'm feeling sorry for myself. Everything I think about today seems to be negative. There are issues that didn't just start bothering me today but I guess I'm just overwhelmed with all the negative right now. One of those black and white t...	buick23	7	972	Apr 28, 2010 by canadianguy
	scared (Preview) My ABF and I have been chatting he is back in AA after his last slip which nearly took him to suicide. I have been running from him so scared not wanting any part not wanting to rescue to enable to watch what was happening. He has been chasing me since he has got back on the programme. Says he now knows how muc...	Tracy	2	839	Apr 28, 2010 by ythannah
	Happy Birthday wishes to.......................... (Preview) The one and only Karilynn!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Happy Birthday sweet lady! May your day be full of many blessings. Yours in recovery, Mandy	Mandy123	14	1116	Apr 28, 2010 by Karilynn
	Just starting to figure this out? (Preview) It's a long story, but I'll try to give you all the Cliff notes version. Spent three years with ABF, the last year was us trying to break up. Finally in Aug. 09 I put an end to the roller coaster and the relationship. No contact. Finally I meet a new guy and we hit it off very well. He abandones the relatio...	Dog_ma	3	874	Apr 28, 2010 by kitty
	Love? or addiction? (Preview) Just finished watching the movie.."When Love is not Enough"..the story of Lois Wilson.I teared up during the movie,but not until he got sober.After it was over,I cried the 'ugly' cry as Oprah calls it, lol. I identified with her sometimes.I saw as never before the way I had totally given u...	drucilla06	3	1321	Apr 27, 2010 by glad lee
	Just when I think I get it......I don't. (Preview) I could use some advice, stories, experience....whatever you're willing to give! I've known my Abf-sober for just about 3 years now, however, I've only "known" him as a dry drunk. I'm thankful that I didn't have to do the binges, blackouts and blowouts that I read on this site daily and my...	lizzakiss	3	905	Apr 27, 2010 by Jerry F
	Keeping the focus on me. (Preview) Hello everyone - I am new to the forum although not new to Al-Anon. I have been in a long term marriage with an A who has been sober for a very long time. He has some serious issues through which I have been able to maintain sanity and sometimes serenity by keeping the focus on myself. Lately, I am having...	Nolaprincess	2	801	Apr 27, 2010 by Jerry F
	I have a question... (Preview) When I was at the family week at rehab for my AH, the counselors were talking about us family members and made a statement about us being "f.i.n.e. " and each letter stood for something. Do any of you know what they stand for, I can't remember? I really wanted to write them down to remind me.....	Sweet Stanley	3	774	Apr 27, 2010 by Sweet Stanley
	funny and annoying and weird (Preview) For 4 years (just recently with the dad (69( and 21 year old "girlfriend")motocycle dirt bike racing- my 4 years of participation every other weekend I have noticed it is very typical for any girlfriend/ wife- female watching the rider race to wear a jersy with the rider's number...	glad	2	833	Apr 27, 2010 by tlcate
	Sad Realization (Preview) Some of you are concerned about your kids. I was talking to my daughter, now 35 almost, about how her brother 34 almost is so anxiety ridden. He worries about things that are 2 years away. Worries he is doing all he is doing for someone to take it away.(house, jeep, boat etc.) She says to me,"Mom we ar...	lyndebi	4	975	Apr 27, 2010 by Jozie
	intro and having a really tough week (Preview) Hi my name is dalia and i'm new here. i had a 9 yr relationship with an addict/alcoholic that i ended 4 years ago. he's been in recovery (aa and counselling) since then, has held the same job for 4 years. the last thing i told him was that i could not do it any more and that he owed it to himself to get treatmen...	dalia	2	850	Apr 27, 2010 by Mattie
	Feeling Lost.... (Preview) It has been a terrible weekend, we had a day of strongs storms here and a friend of mine died while trying to get into her storm shelter, she fell and hit her head and it was fatal. I loved her and had known her for more than thirty years, she was a wonderful person. Another friend of mine from high school...	DreamsOver	3	806	Apr 26, 2010 by hotrod
	Denial denial denial (Preview) So my husband is moving again, cause that's the solution to our separation and to his alcoholism. I told him again on Saturday that until he gets sober we are not getting back together, and even if he moves to my dream house, I'm staying put in MY house. He says that if he's gonna give me EVERYTHING why I ca...	Priscilla83	2	871	Apr 26, 2010 by Aloha
	The Story of Lois W.... Wow! (Preview) Just watched the Hallmark movie, "When Love Isn't Enough", about Lois W. The wife of Bill W. and struggles she endured as the wife of an alcoholic and the beginnings of Al-Anon. I must admit, it put a hump in my throat more than once. What a beautiful story of love, hope, faith and reaching out to other...	John	7	1217	Apr 26, 2010 by ythannah
	I'm New and So Confused (Preview) Hi everyone. I've been with my alcoholic boyfriend for over 8 years. The drinking has gotten really bad over the past two years. I am also an adult child of an alcoholic (my dad). I finally kicked him out about a month ago. All of the deceit, mental and emotional abuse, abandonment, etc. I just couldn't d...	jettiesgirl	6	907	Apr 26, 2010 by jettiesgirl
	Talked to the A (Preview) A is starting his supervised visitations with our daughter this week so I had to call and find out when he was coming (i will not be home when he comes to see her, my mother is going to supervise his visitations)... Of course he automatically started with the "i miss you", "i love y...	Hopeless	6	825	Apr 26, 2010 by Hopeless
	List of Adult Behaviors Alanon adult list behaviors (Preview) Hi, Once in an Alanon meeting I heard a list read of 12 to 15 ways in which an adult should behave. What is this list? Where can I find it in the literature? I would love to find this list so I can make a copy for myself and learn it. It has things like, "an adult is happy for someone instead of envious when t...	bucknathaniel	2	1412	Apr 26, 2010 by abbyal
	If I Could Say Only One Thing------I Would Say Thank You Lois (Preview) To my MIP Family, David wrote a great post on gratitude today. I just watched the Hallmark Hall of Fame movie "When Love Is Not Enough". So I've had a double dose of gratitude today. If there is anyone in the family that watched the movie and did not tear-up several times then they didn't watch...	RLC	7	942	Apr 26, 2010 by cdngirl
	Gratitude (Preview) Hi Family, I got home a couple of hours ago from the small conference that my home group hosts every year. This was my seventh year attending and is my annual Al-Anon birthday celebration. On April 17, 2004 I attended this conference at the invitation of my then AA wife, and for that I am grateful. Grat...	david62	6	981	Apr 26, 2010 by Mandy123
	Gratitude always finds a way.... (Preview) I 1st Want to say THANK YOU to all who responded & helped lift me from my Slump Last week, every day I got on here & seen another response, it was really an uplifting part of my day, and helped carry me thru, many tears, many memories of those past... I DID Make a Meeting last night, and it was SOOOO ni...	Jozie	2	750	Apr 26, 2010 by hotrod
	Shine (Preview) Here's a little inspirational quote from Nelson Mandela: Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actual...	intothewoods	3	861	Apr 26, 2010 by pineapple
	new and learning(I hope) (Preview) I'm a wife of a addict/alcoholic. We've been together for 29 years, 25 of them married. He was a drug user back in 1987, when I was pregnant with our first child. He entered rehab in 1988 and was clean for 18 years. He started using prescription drugs and when the debt piled high he turned to drinking to for...	hopeforrecovery	3	806	Apr 26, 2010 by pineapple
	I Never realized How Lost I Would Be Without---- What ?? (Preview) I have been without internet service for the last two day at my business, modem problems. If someone had told me ten or twelve years ago that I would have a hard time doing without the Internet--- my Black Labs--- a microwave--- and MIP, I would have told them they were crazy. But they would have been ri...	RLC	8	1008	Apr 26, 2010 by pineapple
	Does Anyone Know (Preview) If the movie Love Is Not... Being Shown In The UK Or Even Online Perhaps?? Belle1x	belle1	3	681	Apr 25, 2010 by Mandy123
	I ended it... (Preview) Well, I had gone to his house the other day... but the timing was not right. Last night, he went out to the bars and I was once again left to worry and drive myself nuts. So, today he made me lunch. I went there to talk. He was certainly not prepared to hear what I had to say. I appeared strong (even thou...	daisygirl	11	997	Apr 25, 2010 by lonewolfmama
	Need to vent (Preview) Hi Guys, am after two punishing days, things went ok but very long. I come home to relax, and my A father rings, I have no way of knowing who is ringing, will have to get new phone and he starts complaining about why my a-brother is getting passed over for state housing, he has been passed over three times. I...	maire rua	3	911	Apr 25, 2010 by maire rua
	New and not sure... (Preview) Hello, I just joined this group a few moments ago because I have been "planning" to attend actual meetings but it never seems to happen with work. I am the adult child of an alcoholic mother and actually an alcoholic father as well. To keep this short she has been in rehab multiple times and...	CCC12	12	1015	Apr 25, 2010 by maresie
	UPCOMING AL-ANON MESSAGE BOARD MEETING SCHEDULE (Preview) The upcoming Al-Anon Message Board Meeting was to be held this Sunday, April 25th @ 9:00PM...however, due to the high volume of interest in the upcoming movie: When Love is Not Enough; The Story of Lois Wilson, we are rescheduling the Al-Anon Message Board Meeting to be held on SATURDAY, APRIL 24th @...	lacewing	2	1263	Apr 25, 2010 by tlcate
	sick and a bit of apprehension (Preview) Who am I kidding, I am scared. Monday the 26th is the surgery on my shoulder.The tendon is torn away from the bone. Talking major stuff, drills, pins, screws....This is when I am in trouble. I can hold back the big gut pain of the lonliness and actually been lots better. But this brings me too far down. I wo...	lyndebi	10	814	Apr 25, 2010 by buick23
	New start (Preview) Hi all, I have had a chat with my ExABF it was quite nice but hard. He has gone back to Aa and has gotten himself somewhere to live. I told him I could not have a relationship with him anymore that cared for him but I needed to focus on my recovery, life and kids. He said that he was sorry for all the pain , tha...	Tracy	1	621	Apr 24, 2010 by RLC
	compromise not in my vocabulary. (Preview) Today I am going to an al anon conference which isn't as near to my home as I thought. I am having to compromise. In the past, in my perfectinist thinking anything less than total immersion would be a failure. I will probably go to a few workshops and that's about it. For now that's good enough. I had no g...	maresie	2	994	Apr 24, 2010 by maire rua
	And I still obsess... (Preview) I just wrote about this in another response to a post - but my obsessing is almost hardwired into me. It is a physical and automatic response to feeling as though I am out of control OR that abandonment or rejection may be imminent. My A and I live apart now. We had discussed that we would "Date"...	RunnerChick	2	919	Apr 24, 2010 by Tracy
	Update- of the good kind (Preview) I have spent a lot of time on here posting about the disruption to my world so I think you all deserve an update since this board helped me get thru it and I am now hoping to be on the "other" side. Quick back story- At the end of Jan, I discovered my new husband was an A. He had cleverly hid it until so...	Acatnip	2	882	Apr 24, 2010 by Jerry F
	My First Post- My Story (Preview) I am really glad to have found this message board! Feeling the need to share... Three months ago, after having an intervention for my bf, he agreed to go to rehab. I was so happy and relieved. He stayed for detox, but those people were "crazy losers". He was so "bored". He was &quo...	hopeforme	6	1156	Apr 24, 2010 by Tracy
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.