Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

el-cee · el-cee

What is your idea of love? Has it changed since Alanon? How do you know you love your alcoholic and how do you know he loves you as opposed to needing each other?

Sallygcoe · Sallygcoe

I cannot get the perspective that I obviously should according to the al-anon way. My AS is completely consuming my every thought and action. I feel like there is a rubber band around my heart. When you love them so much and are so filled with fear how do you find any kind of perspective? I'm so stressed!...

Melly1248 · Melly1248

Ridiculous optimism is something I have been accused of many times. And I suppose it really has been excessive; when other people have been throwing their hands in the air and screaming "the sky is falling" I've always been the one saying "all right, don't get your knickers in a twist...

Sallygcoe · Sallygcoe

My AS came over this afternoon, very ainxed (sp?) . He had asked if he could come over and have some dinner. I said yes. When he was here he did not want to talk or be talked to. He just wanted to sit in front of the tv and sulk. I got up and found the next right thing to do... Water plants and unload the dishwasher...

texasgal · texasgal

My AH has completely blocked me out of his life. Stating he has a new girlfriend and that he will get sober with her. The new girlfriend is twice as young as him and is a university student. I do not know what to say I guess their is nothing to say. I guess that is part of why I want to leave the city I live in....

hopes314 · hopes314

Anymore I don't know what is true or what is a lie. I told my Ah I went to an open AA meeting that was wonderful. It had so much wisdom and openness and truth. My AH will not go because he will not be in a program that doesn't identify Jesus as the HP. I said everyone has selected who their HP can be. Then I tell h...

Katy · Katy

Yesterday I had plans to view a room advertised in a shared house, it appealed so much to me in the advert because it was set in so many acres of farm land and it said they had a cat and two friendly dogs and the house was sociable and upbeat, I have not been in a position to go this far through finance before so I...

John in GA · John in GA

My wife descended into alcoholism about seven years into our marriage. I know that she may have technically been an alcoholic since birth, but during the early years of our marriage, she drank in moderation, and I rarely saw her drunk. That all started to change at about the seven year point. I coul...

KennyFenderjazz · KennyFenderjazz

http://www.theonion.com/articles/alcohol-unfairly-blamed-for-local-mans-impaired-ju,35745/

Melly1248 · Melly1248

I didn't feel like going to a meeting today, I had a zillion other things I wanted to do but I KNEW it was the next right thing for me so I went. It is school holidays so daughter stayed home with dog and cat curled up in front of the heater watching a movie and I entrusted her with the house key for the first tim...

WorkingThroughIt · WorkingThroughIt

I was thinking about my next door neighbor this morning. when I first moved in last fall I went out onto the back porch to smoke. i didn't know I wasn't allowed to smoke outside or anywhere on the property, I just knew there was no smoking inside. this was in the middle of the night. Suddenly I heard loud yel...

el-cee · el-cee

Can you really live with an active alcoholic and live a happy life? Can it really be done and if so do you have to live seperate lives? How can you focus on your program if its challenged constantly? It just seems to me that the people in alanon who really work this and are happy have sober partners or have le...

Jozie · Jozie

Hey Peeps :) Welp this Last Month Sure has Had its Ups, Downs & turns that felt like my Insides would soon be on my Outside! Survival is def. Key in this Disease & In Life in General! In the Last Month, My Aunt Had her Cancer Surgery, "doing Well" :) Now doing 6wks Radiation to make sure...

Raven Juniper · Raven Juniper

It's funny how this program has been like a little bottle of spray cleaner in my life. I find myself stating my intentions like its a big deal, then see that my actions actually work against my so called purpose. I find myself slipping back into old habits a bit more frequently lately, so I need to re-read...

texasgal · texasgal

I have been separated from my AH for awhile. He filed for divorce saying I was crazy and would have anxiety attacks. Which I did I can admit to that. It was awful living with an alcoholic. I felt crazy all the time. He has a new girlfriend and sent me a text stating that he was doing so much better witho...

Lyne · Lyne

I didn't handle an alcoholic well yesterday, and I have been suffering guilt on and off. It's so ironic to me that after all the raging, scaring, and insane behavior he brings to my family, that I am feeling guilty. He asked me to do something yesterday that would have taken just minutes, and he is reco...

tortuga · tortuga

I realized, as soon as A made contact again, how anger gets to me every time. They may be other forms of abuse, but under the bottom line, it is always anger that get to me. I learned in Al anon and through meditation how to stop reacting. For teasing and provocations were and are many. And I'm grateful for t...

Melly1248 · Melly1248

Oh dear. I've just gotten back from my meeting. It was wonderful

I rode my bike there, feeling fabulous and free riding in the rain when a car began madly tooting behind me. It was cat lady, who came to a stop beside me shouting and gesturing furiously (she was SO ANGRY!!!) because I wasn't wearing a he...

Truth · Truth

Gosh... My ex-A has left four messages (asked him not to call) and I am just not interested in even trying to co-parent. I have not returned one call, text or e-mail. I use to feel guilty about that. Under normal circumstances, (if the person was nice I would return the call) Progress?

Theoceancalls · Theoceancalls

Hi all ....thank you for the comments to my last post. I re read them and try to digest. My emotions are like a runaway train to be quite honest. My family member did have his surgery on Monday and all went well. My AH stayed home willingly, (but....)with our daughter so I could go to the hosp last night...h...

Mnuser320 · Mnuser320

How did I become this person? I am completely unhinged.....again...after putting myself together over and over and over again over the years, I divorced (for the 3rd time...) , and relocated last year to my childhood state, bought a home and brought my mom (acoa) and my 52 year old unmarried alcoholi...

sadsusie · sadsusie

Good morning everyone, I had a revelation about revelations this morning. I have slowly had my eyes opening up and this program is working its magic. This morning I had a revelation - my AH needs to have his OWN revelations. I often have to learn my lessons a number of times before they actually "S...

mamachief · mamachief

I just can't believe it.... said he would try to stay sober lasted 9 days. Well no really not even a day. He bought a bottle the day after his seziure wasn't suppose to drive but said I refused to drive him, not true. I'm really not sure how many days he didn't drink. I've been calling him on it not sure why ch...

cerika111 · cerika111

Hi Alanon family, I have been here before, but it has been a long time. I honestly believe that Alanon saved my life and I thought I understood all of the principles... My daughter, who I watched like a hawk through high school for signs of substance abuse, has been in 7 rehabs in the last 18 months. We fo...

Starting Again · Starting Again

On Friday night I had a feeling it was beginning again. I didn't search but I just got that inkling. Saturday he went to a meeting but left half way through and came home early. He keeps finding reasons not to go. That night he went to sleep and I was awake at 12:30 searching the entire house. Finally I...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Good Morning my Friends I'm lurking on MIP but I'm not helping. I don't have it in me for some reason. I love you all and want so bad to be of service but my head is not in the right place. I'm OK...I'm not sad and upset. Just living. Go from day to day with my prayers, meetings, books and thoughts. I thin...

hopes314 · hopes314

I do alnon and it does help me stay afloat with my AH. When I get my chance I am out of there as soon as the kids are old enough. I have to hate myself so much to allow such a useless A in my life. I know he wouldn't stick around for me. There is no relationship and i understand why people get a divorce because...

slogan_jim · slogan_jim

Hi Everyone, My name is Slogan_Jim and I am a grateful member of al-anon. You know...it's funny with all these great things in my life I am getting cold feet....I keep telling myself to take a different route or to hold off on certain things.....hold back on my growth. Looking for reasons not to go forwa...

Jenn86 · Jenn86

I am fairly new to Al anon. I've been to 6 f2f meetings and a few online meetings. I currently live in an area that doesn't have f2f Al anon meetings so it's a bit challenging when I need support. Right now I feel frustrated because my ABF keeps asking me for money I can't afford to give. I understand thi...

NavySealWife · NavySealWife

Today, is a new day for me I have met my serenity and peace. I have been unhappy with how things have been going with my AH and our marrige and also with my job. This morning my office decided to let me go because I was very liked by my doctors and patient that she felt threatned so she let me go. I have to say tha...

sadsusie · sadsusie

I had such a revelation the last few days. I am feeling more and more comfortable in my own skin. I finally feel like can be lavishly good to myself and not feel guilty about it. I can actually spend money on myself and only 15% feel like I need to say - "see what you have spent". I am looking forwar...

kismetstrand · kismetstrand

April 8 ODAT Would I stand on the seashore and, like King Canure of the ancient legend, try to command the tides? It is just as fruitless to try to control the alcoholic. Yet this is what I would be attempting to force sobriety by my will power. I must honestly admit that I am not even able to control my own th...

giraffe13 · giraffe13

hi guys, I just finished this exercise and I decided 2 do a post b/c I am feeling much better and it may help you too. A friend of mine quit smoking last year, and made a flip book of things to read when he felt like smoking to help with the urges. I did the same with my A. I made a flip book of the facts I know about t...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Today is an off day for me. I am not in synch at all. I feel lost in my head. I don't have a lot to say because I am not sure that whatever will come out will make any sense at all. So, here I am feeling not at all like myself. I thought I was having a pretty good day until I got on the internet. Does anyone else feel th...

KiaOra · KiaOra

Hi all, I've been a lurker on this board for awhile and have been going to Al Anon on and off. Tonight my boyfriend came home and was extremely flustered - said he thinks he might have killed someone, and proceeds to tell me that he beat his friend into a bloody pulp. After explaining, he begins his 'woe is m...

Kerrymom · Kerrymom

So my AH is "in control" (his words) of his drinking, meaning only drinking every other weekend. This has been going on for almost 3 months which is longer than any other time and he says it's because he realized how bad it was for me and doesn't want to lose me and the kids, blah blah blah. He's...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Sorry for all you animal lovers but I feel like I am beating a dead horse w/ all the comments I have been making. I seem to be staying on a subject that I should have dropped a long time ago. I was supposed to speak at our Alano Club on Sunday. I am feeling a bit guilty that I changed my mind & that there is not...

Newlife girl · Newlife girl

My AH asked me to take him to the hospital last Friday night. I refused. It was hard because I knew his blood alcohol level was high... he had been drinking for days I don't live with him but I feel a sense of obligation sometimes. I talked to my sponsor for a while before I decided to give him the AA hotline #...

Wisdom67 · Wisdom67

hello , happy to be here and working my way threw the other side. i see clearly now since the fog has lifted thats all i have to share.

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

I went to dinner with a program friend the other night and she was talking about her sponsor and revealed that she talks to her sponsor daily. I have to admit that I was jealous because I only speak to my sponsor weekly and because she has so many other sponsees, I try not to call her the rest of the week. Gr...

neshema2 · neshema2

Just stopping in to check up on my boardies....hope u all are ok.....income tax is on last month and loved the $$ but oh so tired...daughter #2 is trying to inch her way back in and i set the boundary w/her...unless / until she gets into recovery and i see significent change there will be no my "putti...

slogan_jim · slogan_jim

Hi Everyone, My name is Slogan_Jim and I am a grateful member of al-anon. Growth has been an integral part of my recovery in al-anon. I now feel like I am growing in a different direction from certain people in my life. I've spoken of my friends that I grew up with that frequent bars to often for my liking. T...

Melly1248 · Melly1248

Had a bit of a moment today. (a good moment, I think) That guy that I live with has been saying nothing but sweet things for the past few weeks, telling me he loves me, he misses me, he wants things to go back to how they were. I've been feeling a bit agitated because his words might be nice but in reality his di...

kismetstrand · kismetstrand

I remember reading something about Unresolved Grief several years back. It really hit me hard. I realized that was my problem. I had so much unresolved grief stemming from choices I made that resulted in a divorce and a subsequent marriage to a sociopath and then physical violence by said sociopath....

ct1203 · ct1203

I am new to this group. Looking for somewhere to lay down my burdens. I have been married to an alcoholic for 13 years. We have 2 children. For the most part we did make a good life for ourselves, despite the problem drinking. My husband has always worked, took care of his responsibilities, and basically...

dsjnix · dsjnix

Hello, I am new to the group and new to Al anon. I am seeking an online sponsor. Can anyone point me in the right direction? -- Edited by dsjnix on Monday 7th of April 2014 09:07:26 AM

GeorgiaWife14 · GeorgiaWife14

I have never sought help but know I should have years ago. I grew up in an alcoholic home (dad) and have been married to an alcoholic for almost 23 years. he did not drink much the first 8 or so years of our marriage. When he started I became the nagging wife confronting he said he would gwt help but I began fin...

grateful2be · grateful2be

I met with my A son for lunch today. He is doing well right now with a temporary job and alcohol and drug free. He is making choices I wouldn't make, but he is 38 and must make his own choices. Our connections didn't work for today and after multiple cellphone missed calls and texts for reasons that will...

mm830 · mm830

Today I have been very introspective and prayerful. One thing that always brings me peace is going outside and just watching things. Maybe it sounds corny, but the birds, the flowers, the clouds. New leaves on the trees. And one thought that keeps coming to mind is nature renews. In its own time. When i...

el-cee · el-cee

I was reading 'Hope for Today' and came across a reading on the four M's. I have never heard of these before. They offer an explanation as to why we are attracted to alcoholics. They behaviours that are in response to living with alcoholism. They are martydom, managing, manipulation and mothering....

Emeraldloo · Emeraldloo

I thought I'd say hello. I came here as I need support. I have no one in my situation to talk to. I have a two year old an alcoholic husband. He has put us in great debt. The first year of a baby ate at our relationship and then the drinking got bad. Passed out on the front step. Injuries. Debt. I tried local a...

redred · redred

My mum is an alcoholic but will NEVER admit it. She has been emotionally torturing my poor dad for three days now. Threatening suicide, blaming him and myself for EVERYTHING that is wrong with her. He looks after her non stop but she constantly bitches at him. Ok I will admit the man is really untidy...

Jerry F · Jerry F

and so I was taught when it got that way to stop, stand still, look down at my feet and ask myself "Where am I"? and then to look straight up above me and ask "Where do you want me"? Still fighting the bank regarding the global meltdown with the illegal, immoral, sub-prime fiasc...

Theoceancalls · Theoceancalls

seems as if when it rains it pours. . its pouring yet im strangly calm. . not really, i think maybe im avoiding. where to start. . welllll. . saturday nite. . im home. .ah out. daughter has a friend here tonight. i tend to worry what her friends think and or tell their parents when they see that my ah isnt home...

mamachief · mamachief

I'm so new at all this I don't even know where to start

giraffe13 · giraffe13

I have had some really hard days here sprinkled in between ok days, and a few good days. I will say great days when I am 100% over my A. bf or ex bf. whatever. I was not feeling good, and I actually called the phone bridge. Brilliant idea! 1.ironically the first 2 shares were exactly like my situation and tho...

xohhhgirlx · xohhhgirlx

I'm at a loss. I've been in love with someone for a while now and we have finally this past year got together. It was a long distance relationship until I moved back into town. Things went from perfect to just hurtful. He became distant(even more so than just the 8 hours distance itself). He would dis...

nurse32 · nurse32

Hi, this is my first time on here. I am a 24 year old women, nurse, mommy of 2, and divorced. i met my boyfriend almost 3 years ago after separating from my now ex husband and after he went to jail for a DWI (his 3rd in tx) i quickly became pregnant within 4 months of meeting him. He is a wonderful, amazing, lovi...

Tracy · Tracy

Hi all, I was in a situation yesterday were I wanted something, I really wanted it, I had visualisations of how my life would be if I got it. I prayed I talked to HP, I told him your WILL be done whatever the outcome I know it is for the best. I trusted that he can see around the corner and knows what is best for me...

Jkphotogal · Jkphotogal

My AH finally admitted he has a problem and went to his first AA meeting on Thursday. It was tough for him to go, but he went. So my question for all of you is, now what? He says he's going again today, but how do I encourage him to keep going without nagging?

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Thinking about Love! (Preview) What is your idea of love? Has it changed since Alanon? How do you know you love your alcoholic and how do you know he loves you as opposed to needing each other?	el-cee	10	613	Apr 12, 2014 by milkwood
	Can't get a god perspective (Preview) I cannot get the perspective that I obviously should according to the al-anon way. My AS is completely consuming my every thought and action. I feel like there is a rubber band around my heart. When you love them so much and are so filled with fear how do you find any kind of perspective? I'm so stressed!...	Sallygcoe	9	437	Apr 12, 2014 by PP
	I wonder. (Preview) Ridiculous optimism is something I have been accused of many times. And I suppose it really has been excessive; when other people have been throwing their hands in the air and screaming "the sky is falling" I've always been the one saying "all right, don't get your knickers in a twist...	Melly1248	13	665	Apr 12, 2014 by PP
	Small victory for me ... I think (Preview) My AS came over this afternoon, very ainxed (sp?) . He had asked if he could come over and have some dinner. I said yes. When he was here he did not want to talk or be talked to. He just wanted to sit in front of the tv and sulk. I got up and found the next right thing to do... Water plants and unload the dishwasher...	Sallygcoe	5	509	Apr 12, 2014 by Jerry F
	I still love my AH (Preview) My AH has completely blocked me out of his life. Stating he has a new girlfriend and that he will get sober with her. The new girlfriend is twice as young as him and is a university student. I do not know what to say I guess their is nothing to say. I guess that is part of why I want to leave the city I live in....	texasgal	13	659	Apr 12, 2014 by Jerry F
	truth or lies (Preview) Anymore I don't know what is true or what is a lie. I told my Ah I went to an open AA meeting that was wonderful. It had so much wisdom and openness and truth. My AH will not go because he will not be in a program that doesn't identify Jesus as the HP. I said everyone has selected who their HP can be. Then I tell h...	hopes314	11	620	Apr 11, 2014 by Debilyn
	I went to look at a new place to live! (Preview) Yesterday I had plans to view a room advertised in a shared house, it appealed so much to me in the advert because it was set in so many acres of farm land and it said they had a cat and two friendly dogs and the house was sociable and upbeat, I have not been in a position to go this far through finance before so I...	Katy	6	459	Apr 11, 2014 by Debilyn
	Who is this sober person I'm married to? marriage (Preview) My wife descended into alcoholism about seven years into our marriage. I know that she may have technically been an alcoholic since birth, but during the early years of our marriage, she drank in moderation, and I rarely saw her drunk. That all started to change at about the seven year point. I coul...	John in GA	7	8369	Apr 11, 2014 by KennyFenderjazz
	Today's chuckle (Preview) http://www.theonion.com/articles/alcohol-unfairly-blamed-for-local-mans-impaired-ju,35745/	KennyFenderjazz	3	356	Apr 11, 2014 by el-cee
	Today's other success story. (Preview) I didn't feel like going to a meeting today, I had a zillion other things I wanted to do but I KNEW it was the next right thing for me so I went. It is school holidays so daughter stayed home with dog and cat curled up in front of the heater watching a movie and I entrusted her with the house key for the first tim...	Melly1248	8	487	Apr 11, 2014 by el-cee
	Levelling Pride and Allowing Others To Own Their Stuff (Preview) I was thinking about my next door neighbor this morning. when I first moved in last fall I went out onto the back porch to smoke. i didn't know I wasn't allowed to smoke outside or anywhere on the property, I just knew there was no smoking inside. this was in the middle of the night. Suddenly I heard loud yel...	WorkingThroughIt	3	430	Apr 11, 2014 by bud
	can you really do it? (Preview) Can you really live with an active alcoholic and live a happy life? Can it really be done and if so do you have to live seperate lives? How can you focus on your program if its challenged constantly? It just seems to me that the people in alanon who really work this and are happy have sober partners or have le...	el-cee	23	779	Apr 11, 2014 by el-cee
	The Roller Coaster Of Life.... (Preview) Hey Peeps :) Welp this Last Month Sure has Had its Ups, Downs & turns that felt like my Insides would soon be on my Outside! Survival is def. Key in this Disease & In Life in General! In the Last Month, My Aunt Had her Cancer Surgery, "doing Well" :) Now doing 6wks Radiation to make sure...	Jozie	3	535	Apr 10, 2014 by PP
	Slowly but surely....Long Rambly Post (Preview) It's funny how this program has been like a little bottle of spray cleaner in my life. I find myself stating my intentions like its a big deal, then see that my actions actually work against my so called purpose. I find myself slipping back into old habits a bit more frequently lately, so I need to re-read...	Raven Juniper	3	504	Apr 10, 2014 by PP
	do I stay or do I go (Preview) I have been separated from my AH for awhile. He filed for divorce saying I was crazy and would have anxiety attacks. Which I did I can admit to that. It was awful living with an alcoholic. I felt crazy all the time. He has a new girlfriend and sent me a text stating that he was doing so much better witho...	texasgal	4	538	Apr 10, 2014 by Beatrice
	guilt (Preview) I didn't handle an alcoholic well yesterday, and I have been suffering guilt on and off. It's so ironic to me that after all the raging, scaring, and insane behavior he brings to my family, that I am feeling guilty. He asked me to do something yesterday that would have taken just minutes, and he is reco...	Lyne	5	477	Apr 10, 2014 by Beatrice
	understanding: anger is the abuse I suffer from (Preview) I realized, as soon as A made contact again, how anger gets to me every time. They may be other forms of abuse, but under the bottom line, it is always anger that get to me. I learned in Al anon and through meditation how to stop reacting. For teasing and provocations were and are many. And I'm grateful for t...	tortuga	3	536	Apr 10, 2014 by ClearTheFog
	lol!! (Preview) Oh dear. I've just gotten back from my meeting. It was wonderful I rode my bike there, feeling fabulous and free riding in the rain when a car began madly tooting behind me. It was cat lady, who came to a stop beside me shouting and gesturing furiously (she was SO ANGRY!!!) because I wasn't wearing a he...	Melly1248	17	589	Apr 10, 2014 by Breakingfree
	He keeps leaving messages (Preview) Gosh... My ex-A has left four messages (asked him not to call) and I am just not interested in even trying to co-parent. I have not returned one call, text or e-mail. I use to feel guilty about that. Under normal circumstances, (if the person was nice I would return the call) Progress?	Truth	6	456	Apr 10, 2014 by SerenityRUS
	all over the place (Preview) Hi all ....thank you for the comments to my last post. I re read them and try to digest. My emotions are like a runaway train to be quite honest. My family member did have his surgery on Monday and all went well. My AH stayed home willingly, (but....)with our daughter so I could go to the hosp last night...h...	Theoceancalls	9	497	Apr 9, 2014 by Grace7
	Anger/Resentment (Preview) How did I become this person? I am completely unhinged.....again...after putting myself together over and over and over again over the years, I divorced (for the 3rd time...) , and relocated last year to my childhood state, bought a home and brought my mom (acoa) and my 52 year old unmarried alcoholi...	Mnuser320	10	431	Apr 9, 2014 by Mnuser320
	Getting out of their way / a revelation about revelations detachment getting out of their way focus on me happiness truth (Preview) Good morning everyone, I had a revelation about revelations this morning. I have slowly had my eyes opening up and this program is working its magic. This morning I had a revelation - my AH needs to have his OWN revelations. I often have to learn my lessons a number of times before they actually "S...	sadsusie	6	15144	Apr 9, 2014 by oldergal
	ugh so annoyed (Preview) I just can't believe it.... said he would try to stay sober lasted 9 days. Well no really not even a day. He bought a bottle the day after his seziure wasn't suppose to drive but said I refused to drive him, not true. I'm really not sure how many days he didn't drink. I've been calling him on it not sure why ch...	mamachief	7	477	Apr 9, 2014 by grateful2be
	My daughter is in jail Child daughter out of control (Preview) Hi Alanon family, I have been here before, but it has been a long time. I honestly believe that Alanon saved my life and I thought I understood all of the principles... My daughter, who I watched like a hawk through high school for signs of substance abuse, has been in 7 rehabs in the last 18 months. We fo...	cerika111	14	10887	Apr 9, 2014 by cerika111
	searching for bottles (Preview) On Friday night I had a feeling it was beginning again. I didn't search but I just got that inkling. Saturday he went to a meeting but left half way through and came home early. He keeps finding reasons not to go. That night he went to sleep and I was awake at 12:30 searching the entire house. Finally I...	Starting Again	9	480	Apr 9, 2014 by grateful2be
	I don't have it in me (Preview) Good Morning my Friends I'm lurking on MIP but I'm not helping. I don't have it in me for some reason. I love you all and want so bad to be of service but my head is not in the right place. I'm OK...I'm not sad and upset. Just living. Go from day to day with my prayers, meetings, books and thoughts. I thin...	Cathyinaz	14	459	Apr 9, 2014 by ParisMemories
	i see my life (Preview) I do alnon and it does help me stay afloat with my AH. When I get my chance I am out of there as soon as the kids are old enough. I have to hate myself so much to allow such a useless A in my life. I know he wouldn't stick around for me. There is no relationship and i understand why people get a divorce because...	hopes314	5	599	Apr 9, 2014 by PP
	Questioning where this is all leading me. (Preview) Hi Everyone, My name is Slogan_Jim and I am a grateful member of al-anon. You know...it's funny with all these great things in my life I am getting cold feet....I keep telling myself to take a different route or to hold off on certain things.....hold back on my growth. Looking for reasons not to go forwa...	slogan_jim	3	500	Apr 9, 2014 by KennyFenderjazz
	New--Frustrated (Preview) I am fairly new to Al anon. I've been to 6 f2f meetings and a few online meetings. I currently live in an area that doesn't have f2f Al anon meetings so it's a bit challenging when I need support. Right now I feel frustrated because my ABF keeps asking me for money I can't afford to give. I understand thi...	Jenn86	3	439	Apr 9, 2014 by KennyFenderjazz
	Today is the start of a new beginning, one door closes and hope another door opens.... (Preview) Today, is a new day for me I have met my serenity and peace. I have been unhappy with how things have been going with my AH and our marrige and also with my job. This morning my office decided to let me go because I was very liked by my doctors and patient that she felt threatned so she let me go. I have to say tha...	NavySealWife	1	312	Apr 9, 2014 by Debilyn
	My intense rage....but still love him.. (Preview) I had such a revelation the last few days. I am feeling more and more comfortable in my own skin. I finally feel like can be lavishly good to myself and not feel guilty about it. I can actually spend money on myself and only 15% feel like I need to say - "see what you have spent". I am looking forwar...	sadsusie	13	685	Apr 8, 2014 by sadsusie
	Control, Interfere, Protect vs. Improvement (Preview) April 8 ODAT Would I stand on the seashore and, like King Canure of the ancient legend, try to command the tides? It is just as fruitless to try to control the alcoholic. Yet this is what I would be attempting to force sobriety by my will power. I must honestly admit that I am not even able to control my own th...	kismetstrand	2	452	Apr 8, 2014 by Cathyinaz
	an exercise for progress (Preview) hi guys, I just finished this exercise and I decided 2 do a post b/c I am feeling much better and it may help you too. A friend of mine quit smoking last year, and made a flip book of things to read when he felt like smoking to help with the urges. I did the same with my A. I made a flip book of the facts I know about t...	giraffe13	3	782	Apr 8, 2014 by PP
	I think my thinker is broken (Preview) Today is an off day for me. I am not in synch at all. I feel lost in my head. I don't have a lot to say because I am not sure that whatever will come out will make any sense at all. So, here I am feeling not at all like myself. I thought I was having a pretty good day until I got on the internet. Does anyone else feel th...	Hoot Nanny	4	415	Apr 8, 2014 by grateful2be
	Advice appreciated (Preview) Hi all, I've been a lurker on this board for awhile and have been going to Al Anon on and off. Tonight my boyfriend came home and was extremely flustered - said he thinks he might have killed someone, and proceeds to tell me that he beat his friend into a bloody pulp. After explaining, he begins his 'woe is m...	KiaOra	8	608	Apr 8, 2014 by grateful2be
	Am I just pessimistic? (Preview) So my AH is "in control" (his words) of his drinking, meaning only drinking every other weekend. This has been going on for almost 3 months which is longer than any other time and he says it's because he realized how bad it was for me and doesn't want to lose me and the kids, blah blah blah. He's...	Kerrymom	6	434	Apr 8, 2014 by PP
	it is like beating a dead horse... (Preview) Sorry for all you animal lovers but I feel like I am beating a dead horse w/ all the comments I have been making. I seem to be staying on a subject that I should have dropped a long time ago. I was supposed to speak at our Alano Club on Sunday. I am feeling a bit guilty that I changed my mind & that there is not...	Hoot Nanny	0	372	Apr 8, 2014 by Hoot Nanny
	I practiced detachment better than ever (Preview) My AH asked me to take him to the hospital last Friday night. I refused. It was hard because I knew his blood alcohol level was high... he had been drinking for days I don't live with him but I feel a sense of obligation sometimes. I talked to my sponsor for a while before I decided to give him the AA hotline #...	Newlife girl	7	555	Apr 8, 2014 by Mitsy
	wisdom (Preview) hello , happy to be here and working my way threw the other side. i see clearly now since the fog has lifted thats all i have to share.	Wisdom67	9	695	Apr 8, 2014 by PP
	How often do you talk to your sponsor? (Preview) I went to dinner with a program friend the other night and she was talking about her sponsor and revealed that she talks to her sponsor daily. I have to admit that I was jealous because I only speak to my sponsor weekly and because she has so many other sponsees, I try not to call her the rest of the week. Gr...	ilovedogs	8	725	Apr 8, 2014 by Mitsy
	Just stopping by------------------ (Preview) Just stopping in to check up on my boardies....hope u all are ok.....income tax is on last month and loved the $$ but oh so tired...daughter #2 is trying to inch her way back in and i set the boundary w/her...unless / until she gets into recovery and i see significent change there will be no my "putti...	neshema2	7	404	Apr 8, 2014 by Tasha
	Out-growing people. (Preview) Hi Everyone, My name is Slogan_Jim and I am a grateful member of al-anon. Growth has been an integral part of my recovery in al-anon. I now feel like I am growing in a different direction from certain people in my life. I've spoken of my friends that I grew up with that frequent bars to often for my liking. T...	slogan_jim	20	934	Apr 8, 2014 by Tasha
	Nearly there. (Preview) Had a bit of a moment today. (a good moment, I think) That guy that I live with has been saying nothing but sweet things for the past few weeks, telling me he loves me, he misses me, he wants things to go back to how they were. I've been feeling a bit agitated because his words might be nice but in reality his di...	Melly1248	16	700	Apr 7, 2014 by pinkchip
	Unresolved Grief (Preview) I remember reading something about Unresolved Grief several years back. It really hit me hard. I realized that was my problem. I had so much unresolved grief stemming from choices I made that resulted in a divorce and a subsequent marriage to a sociopath and then physical violence by said sociopath....	kismetstrand	2	569	Apr 7, 2014 by Jerry F
	Here it goes... (Preview) I am new to this group. Looking for somewhere to lay down my burdens. I have been married to an alcoholic for 13 years. We have 2 children. For the most part we did make a good life for ourselves, despite the problem drinking. My husband has always worked, took care of his responsibilities, and basically...	ct1203	7	416	Apr 7, 2014 by Newlife girl
	seeking an online sponsor (Preview) Hello, I am new to the group and new to Al anon. I am seeking an online sponsor. Can anyone point me in the right direction? -- Edited by dsjnix on Monday 7th of April 2014 09:07:26 AM	dsjnix	1	266	Apr 7, 2014 by kismetstrand
	Feeling lost (Preview) I have never sought help but know I should have years ago. I grew up in an alcoholic home (dad) and have been married to an alcoholic for almost 23 years. he did not drink much the first 8 or so years of our marriage. When he started I became the nagging wife confronting he said he would gwt help but I began fin...	GeorgiaWife14	6	370	Apr 7, 2014 by PP
	My son and a turnaround (Preview) I met with my A son for lunch today. He is doing well right now with a temporary job and alcohol and drug free. He is making choices I wouldn't make, but he is 38 and must make his own choices. Our connections didn't work for today and after multiple cellphone missed calls and texts for reasons that will...	grateful2be	20	718	Apr 7, 2014 by neshema2
	Nature (Preview) Today I have been very introspective and prayerful. One thing that always brings me peace is going outside and just watching things. Maybe it sounds corny, but the birds, the flowers, the clouds. New leaves on the trees. And one thought that keeps coming to mind is nature renews. In its own time. When i...	mm830	5	359	Apr 7, 2014 by neshema2
	The four M's (Preview) I was reading 'Hope for Today' and came across a reading on the four M's. I have never heard of these before. They offer an explanation as to why we are attracted to alcoholics. They behaviours that are in response to living with alcoholism. They are martydom, managing, manipulation and mothering....	el-cee	12	1815	Apr 7, 2014 by milkwood
	New and not in a group. (Preview) I thought I'd say hello. I came here as I need support. I have no one in my situation to talk to. I have a two year old an alcoholic husband. He has put us in great debt. The first year of a baby ate at our relationship and then the drinking got bad. Passed out on the front step. Injuries. Debt. I tried local a...	Emeraldloo	9	509	Apr 7, 2014 by Emeraldloo
	Its the cruelty that gets to me.... (Preview) My mum is an alcoholic but will NEVER admit it. She has been emotionally torturing my poor dad for three days now. Threatening suicide, blaming him and myself for EVERYTHING that is wrong with her. He looks after her non stop but she constantly bitches at him. Ok I will admit the man is really untidy...	redred	5	698	Apr 6, 2014 by KennyFenderjazz
	Can't see the forest for the trees.... (Preview) and so I was taught when it got that way to stop, stand still, look down at my feet and ask myself "Where am I"? and then to look straight up above me and ask "Where do you want me"? Still fighting the bank regarding the global meltdown with the illegal, immoral, sub-prime fiasc...	Jerry F	12	505	Apr 6, 2014 by KennyFenderjazz
	just needing to connect (Preview) seems as if when it rains it pours. . its pouring yet im strangly calm. . not really, i think maybe im avoiding. where to start. . welllll. . saturday nite. . im home. .ah out. daughter has a friend here tonight. i tend to worry what her friends think and or tell their parents when they see that my ah isnt home...	Theoceancalls	7	573	Apr 6, 2014 by sadsusie
	New (Preview) I'm so new at all this I don't even know where to start	mamachief	9	379	Apr 6, 2014 by KennyFenderjazz
	al anon meetings were helpful to me recently (Preview) I have had some really hard days here sprinkled in between ok days, and a few good days. I will say great days when I am 100% over my A. bf or ex bf. whatever. I was not feeling good, and I actually called the phone bridge. Brilliant idea! 1.ironically the first 2 shares were exactly like my situation and tho...	giraffe13	4	413	Apr 6, 2014 by PP
	New..Sad..and in need of help. (Preview) I'm at a loss. I've been in love with someone for a while now and we have finally this past year got together. It was a long distance relationship until I moved back into town. Things went from perfect to just hurtful. He became distant(even more so than just the 8 hours distance itself). He would dis...	xohhhgirlx	4	567	Apr 6, 2014 by pinkchip
	New here, new to addiction (Preview) Hi, this is my first time on here. I am a 24 year old women, nurse, mommy of 2, and divorced. i met my boyfriend almost 3 years ago after separating from my now ex husband and after he went to jail for a DWI (his 3rd in tx) i quickly became pregnant within 4 months of meeting him. He is a wonderful, amazing, lovi...	nurse32	3	727	Apr 6, 2014 by pinkchip
	HP's will v my will (Preview) Hi all, I was in a situation yesterday were I wanted something, I really wanted it, I had visualisations of how my life would be if I got it. I prayed I talked to HP, I told him your WILL be done whatever the outcome I know it is for the best. I trusted that he can see around the corner and knows what is best for me...	Tracy	5	419	Apr 6, 2014 by grateful2be
	AH went to 1st AA meeting.... now what? (Preview) My AH finally admitted he has a problem and went to his first AA meeting on Thursday. It was tough for him to go, but he went. So my question for all of you is, now what? He says he's going again today, but how do I encourage him to keep going without nagging?	Jkphotogal	7	840	Apr 5, 2014 by Jerry F
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.