Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

shellyj123 · shellyj123

For the first time in ages, I feel like I am slowly finding my way back to my independant, self sufficient, happy, and confident self. The journey has been long and rough at times, and it continues and will continue forever, and I am happy and looking forward to each and every day of it. I've finally allo...

blender_girl · blender_girl

I can see it when it's happening. I know it's futile to argue, but there are times when it seems I just can't help it. And it's over the dumbest stuff. Usually because the topic of conversation shifts and my AH doesn't bother to tell me, then starts talking down to me when I express confusion and atte...

koukou · koukou

I wanted to share my story for some thoughts and experiences you all went through. I am no longer living with my AH and we are divorced a year ago...I know i dont want to get back to him and our marriage has made me discover so many deffects of character which i need to work on to be a healthier and happier pers...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((((Family))))), A quick HAPPY 4th of JULY to all! Have a wonderful weekend. Celebrate the meaning of this day. I am so proud to be an American. To my military families thank you for doing what you do. Come home safe and sound to us. I am off to work for the entire weekend, but that's okay. I have lot...

DreamsOver · DreamsOver

I appreciate every response to my question. There is a lot of love and wisdom here.

Rora · Rora

I tend to focus on the struggles I have and post to seek the invaluable support and ESH offered here. A situation occurred the other day and I wanted to share how it helped me to realize that the tools I am gaining spread to my Non-A interactions as well. The other night I ordered a pizza for pick up. It was...

blender_girl · blender_girl

The time has come for me to make some changes. A few days of peace and quiet every few weeks is not enough for me to heal. Being in the same house the majority of the time simply takes its toll on me when my AH is drinking. I can detach most of the time, but sometimes the insanity just leaks in and takes hold....

Sincerely · Sincerely

Hello and Hugs,This month makes one year since HP guided me to MIP. That is my #1 on my gratitude list today. Even though the last year has been a tough one, it has been one of the best ones. As many newbies do, I came here hopeless and desperate of learning how to deal with the alcoholic in my life. Wha...

Overcome · Overcome

Hi MIP family. Thought I would just keep you abreast of my situation and hold myself accountable at the same time. I met with the lawyer today and had all the information that I needed for him to file an uncontested divorce, except husband's address (which I have and forgot to bring) and social security...

Overcome · Overcome

I am having trouble loading the chat room, because my computer says that my adobe reader is damaged and can't be fixed. I guess that somehow effects my Java from running and now I can't get into chat. I am going to take my computer to the "fix-it" guy, since I know nothing about computers and am...

Suzannah · Suzannah

For some years now I have this friend who over and over and over again tells me that the one thing holding me back is the fact that I hold on to my married name. She goes as far as to tell me that all the powers on earth are working against me in that name. She tells me that until I relinquish this name I will alw...

gngcrzy · gngcrzy

I spent yesterday evening with a guy who I like well enough but not LIKE like, as we used to say. Fun. Not much too it. I don't particularly even care what he thinks of me. And yet here I am obsessing about what I should have said differently or not said or... or... or... LOL I swear, my brain does this on auto...

crispin777 · crispin777

I don't know where to begin and I am almost to tired to think. I have not talked to him in almost 2 days. He is 3 weeks sober and seemingly doing great. But it also seems that i no longer have a place in his life now that he has found AA. He has checked himself in to a 12-step halfway house type place right dow...

smy922000 · smy922000

Hy husband is an alcoholic. He has tried AA and claims it doesn't work for him. Makes him feel like drinking more. He has tried to quit for about 5 years now. His older brother died of alcoholism and he says he's doomed to be just like him. The past 2 weeks he has gotten drunk every night - very drunk. I miss h...

beacheemom · beacheemom

I suppose it's normal to feel like you are on one, right? One day good, the next bad, then good and so on. No wonder we all feel like we are going crazy!! I thank God for this place. I think I have found, for me, what is going to keep me focused on me and my kids. Everytime I take the plunge and start to organize th...

lam0204 · lam0204

I went to my first face to face meeting!!!!!!!!!! it took me a long time to get there but i did it and now i am looking forward to going back...i guess i thought if he would just quit drinking everything would be fine. he is now 2 years sober and I am certainly not fine....but i am ready to work on myself for a...

christinajeanne · christinajeanne

I haven't posted in such a long time. But, I'm glad to be back on here. I will be updating and look foreword to talking to everyone. I missed you all! I hope everyone is doing ok. Christina

christinajeanne · christinajeanne

I woke up last night with a pit in my stomach. That has been happening to me a lot lately. But, instead of fretting about it I just spent time with God and went back to sleep. I felt a sense of peace come over me. Then yesterday as I was going to pick up my lunch I decided to go into a local bookstore. I ran into a fr...

Jozie · Jozie

****Sooo for me today this was a tough one... I went to the mail and got out my Test Results I have been dreading... For good reason... So Choles. was Up to 216... WOW... BAD Very BAD... BUT... On a good note, My Tryglycerides that at one time was up over 880... was down to 120.. Not Great But ALOT BETTER... S...

Karilynn · Karilynn

Just checking to see if I can post yet! I can put things on the whiteboard. We'll see.

Jerry F · Jerry F

Aloha MIP Family...I am grateful that when I had to fall back on others for support you all were there!! It was 3+ hours before my spouse made it home and absolutely nothing I would have planned or expected or feared about came about. Every time I went to put my crown on along with my sword and shield I end...

Jerry F · Jerry F

Okay flights been delayed over 3 hours..... Instead to reacting I decided to come back here and hold myself still and read some more. How bad can it get? Actually after reading some of the post...this isn't even a knee jerk. Gratefully. (((((hugs)))))

Jerry F · Jerry F

The spouse is returning this afternoon from her annual family trip to the mainland. She called yesterday to tell me what time she would be at the Hilo Airport so that I could be there to pick her up suggesting that If I were to leave the house 10 minutes before she landed I could get there just after she got...

Eve55 · Eve55

I feel like one of my husband's friends has been a terrible influence on him. Drinking and smoking pot all the time. And getting ahold of and bringing over other types of drugs that my husband never would have sought out on his own. There is a festival coming up this weekend. Previously I had gone with...

JBee · JBee

Hi all,I'm glad to have found this community to share and learn and I'm looking forward to meeting all of you. Where to begin...I'm 26 and I've been in a relationship with an alcoholic for two years now. The first year I didn't really notice the effects on him, or I just didn't take them too seriously. How...

xter · xter

argh... people have been posting about this issue (their ABF or AH or AGF or AW in early recovery and acting like a horrible mess - and then slipping and then being awful again...) and i really don't want to rehash it but i kinda want to just vent. i'm going away for 5 days after work tomorrow. AH said he was...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

Those of you who have followed my story/struggle/recovery the past 7 mths know where I came from and how miserably impossible it was for me to Detach... It will be two weeks this Thursday and for me that is a miracle and a blessing! There has been absolutely NC. ESABF dropped my stuff off last week and s...

maire rua · maire rua

Dear All, went to funeral this evening, it was a quiet one, I guess alcoholics are only drawing a crowd when they are paying for drinks or providing the entertainment, I did not see many of the publicans who would have gained financially from this woman's death there, but hold it, its not to say they were...

maresie · maresie

I am on a roll in terms of decluttering and have some major projects to do. I need to get them done shortly as my life is going in many different directions now. I need to step up and take care of this. I am posting this so I have to make a update on the issue regularly. There is always something that gets in t...

maresie · maresie

I have just finished reading Beautiful Boy by David Scheff. The author and his son were on Oprah which is one reason I read the book. I think this is a great book if you are in early al anon. The author is a great writer and talks earnestly and passionately about the pain and anxiety of being involved with...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am finding myself to be a little bored lately. I try to keep busy but seem to still be bored. I am doing better this time of my life. I am getting along pretty well with my husband & somewhat better with my mom. Sometimes I just want to go to meetings again like I mentioned before without my mom there. O...

Pfunk · Pfunk

I just worked my 1st step "again" with my new sponsor. The first time, my A boyfriend was still active. Since he went into recovery and in a 1/2 house, I found myself wanting to take control and force solutions again especially after he broke off our 7 year relationship. What working th...

DreamsOver · DreamsOver

to hold on. My AS drives a very old beat up truck his father and I gave him several years ago, I had a very little hope (but some hope) at that time that he would take a job, but that hope has faded with his continuing drug use. The old truck is now dying, he called me yesterday in a fit saying he was going to run...

beacheemom · beacheemom

As I am learning the ways of Al Anon, and digging deeper into the program, I am coming up with more questions I have. I know that I am supposed to focus more on me and stop the focusing on my AH. I didn't realize how hard this one would be for me. I don't want to sound like I am making excuses, I am just not sure how...

heatherranki · heatherranki

Please clarify something for me. My aoca h is attending al anon. I am too, different group. His take on looking after him seems to be playing out as shutting me out. completely. He does not even talk to me, unless our kids are around. In fact, he seems to be 2 completely different people, totally depen...

maire rua · maire rua

Dear all, am a bit upset today, a lady I know died yesterday evening from chronic alcoholism, leaving her fourteen year old daughter behind. She was my age, 44, and I liked her though she was a messy drunk, she had good qualities but was afflicted with the disease, I am going to part of the funeral and I kno...

waddleton · waddleton

Im in an "emotional growth program" for young adults with five students. It used to be six, but a close friend of mine relapsed and behaved in a way that got her kicked out. Im the only person here currently who doesn't struggle with addiction. For a lot of people, this is an after care afte...

Codependent · Codependent

I can see the red flags with guy I have been posting about. I can see all that, but what bothers me is he feeling of rejection I get after I have embarrassed myself by texting him over and over pretending I was stranded- well sort of pretending. While I know alcohol played a part in my persistence it was mo...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hello my alanon family, just wanted to do a lil catch up as I have been MIA (lol that's my dog's name) from the board and rooms for a bit. I find myself stuggling to keep up with the work building up, home life, and trying to keep the focus on me. The day-to-day drama of living with addiciton and working on cha...

beacheemom · beacheemom

Well, I said in my last reply I was going to bed, but I really need to get this off of my chest. I think it's the reason that today just wasn't a moving forward kind of day. My AH has a friend that has a house on a lake about 1 hour away from our home. This friend is truly a good man. I know my AH will want me and our gir...

Tracy · Tracy

Hi all, I am feeling a bit ashamed. My AB has been sober for 2 months and is doing really well attending meetings, keeping in contact etc. I on the other hand am becoming very resentful after everything I have been through still feel very alone. As he gets better and better he seems to be out all the time...

Inpain · Inpain

I didn't see this one coming. Some of you may have seen my earlier post. I was excited I made my first friend at al-anon and we were invited over for a cookout. It was seriously our first "dry" social event. We have three small children. My friend called and asked if it was ok to invite ano...

Jozie · Jozie

The Biggest Liar was my own Addiction We have lived with dishonesty- in others and in ourselves. Many of us had to learn to cope with the ovcious lies accompanying our parents' dysfunction or the enabling of that dysfunction. One of the ways we coped was to convince ourselves that our perceptions were...

Pfunk · Pfunk

Hello, I'm new to the board but have been in and out of alanon for about 15 years only taking and seriously working my program for the last year. I have been doing great, loving my program, growing within myself and rebuilding a relationship with my recovering AA boyfriend of 7 years. My A lives in a 1/2...

Karilynn · Karilynn

((((Family)))), Here I am my weekend off. I am sicker than a dog. and I'm trying to get better so that I can go to my niece's graduation today. I talked to both my sister and niece yesterday and said that I would most likely be at the graduation. However I wasn't sure if I could make it out to dinner. My s...

Codependent · Codependent

I hope I am not boring you all posting about my dating life, but it makes me feel better to get it out there and get feedback from you guys. After the text apology I sent a text on Thursday just casual and he responded. We didn't talk on Friday. But, Saturday I really wanted to see him. Was going out with...

serenity62 · serenity62

Hi friends, my hub jsut got out of jail (15 months) and 2 months rehab for multiple dui's. He came outta jail with a new addiction..Hydro morphine, he snorts it..so i'm trying to find a room to talk to ppl that can relate to my situation..thanks xo Serenity62..not lol

shadow1 · shadow1

(((((((Everyone)))))))) I'm in need of some ES&H please. I am totally overwhelmed with stress. It seems that things keep piling up on me. I try to deal with one thing at a time but when one issue is resolved then 2 more roll in. I try to reach out to others that are close to me they appear to be disappoin...

Jean4444 · Jean4444

I am back living in the American Midwest and in the summer there are always these weekend "fests" which are completely soaked in alcohol. Having not lived with this for awhile, I had forgotten how gross it is. I went to one last weekend and it all came back to me- totally smashed people all le...

rosielightshines · rosielightshines

ASSIGNMENT__________ STEP 3---Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood him Self parenting step 3---Learn to let go of the compulsive self reliance by reaching out to our Higher Parent as we understand it ########Rosie's take "compulsive self relia...

ajay147 · ajay147

Hi everyone, I have just found this board, or maybe it found me!!! I am so so desperate for some advice. My wife is 5 months pregnant, and she won't stop drinking... What the hell do i do??? From day one, i know she has made no secret that she will have a drink "every now and then". But, on Sunday,...

ernie · ernie

June Business meeting Minutes Meeting was held June 7, 2009 Meeting opened with the serenity prayer Motion to accept May Business Meeting Minutes as posted on the Board - Voted on and accepted Chair meeting schedule was posted and revisedCurrent Chair Schedule is:AMMon Shimo/no altTues -Aun...

Overcome · Overcome

Some of you will remember my "checking for ticks" post, others might even remember my "I've had enough" post, under my old nick of Java, concerning my dry drunk husband. My most recent post was a decision I made to go back into the relationship entitled "doing the same thin...

Grace11 · Grace11

Thanks to all who replied to my post. happy that people bothered to reply. My husband is in rehab. Visited him each day this week and it was very nice and CALM!I was seeing some hope for a future, probably naively? Yesteray and today he was allowed home for a few hours and all we did was fight...over stupid...

beacheemom · beacheemom

for those of you that have read my posts know that one of the hardest things I was/am trying to overcome is my AH lack of motivation when it comes to our home. I had alot of anger and bitterness about this issue. Well, he texted me today and let me know that he bought a weed eater for our yard. This must sound s...

redfred · redfred

So after my last post of presenting an emplyment contract and my seeing the audit to fruition, that went totally out the window. My ex-bf wouldn't sign anything and I stood my ground and walked out. The audit was today and he had to handle it by himself. I don't know the details of the results, only what he...

redfred · redfred

First of all, THANK YOU to everyone who has taken the time to follow my little soap opera on this message board and share some of your wisdom with me. So much is happening and it's happening so fast the I have only been able (emotionally and time wise) to post the most critical information for what's happe...

Overcome · Overcome

I did not do all the things on my "to do" list and Just for that day, I didn't worry about it, I just did "the next right thing" One of the things that I added to my 'to do' list was taking my mom to another Assisted Living Facility (this makes the second one we've visited). She really li...

Suzannah · Suzannah

Even though I know I am working hard, I am changing the things I can and I am accepting the things I cannot, today has been a really hard day. Physically pain is not helping from when my legs collapsed from under me late Monday night and I knocked myself out on my kitchen floor. The fact that I buried a dear d...

Grace11 · Grace11

I have no idea what to do or where to go. I dated a recovering alcoholic for four years. Then around four years ago he was no longer recovering as he started drinking again. In a weird way it was sort of nice in the beginning because he was so relaxed with a few drinks. He had always found it difficult to relax...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Independance Day (Preview) For the first time in ages, I feel like I am slowly finding my way back to my independant, self sufficient, happy, and confident self. The journey has been long and rough at times, and it continues and will continue forever, and I am happy and looking forward to each and every day of it. I've finally allo...	shellyj123	0	329	Jul 4, 2009 by shellyj123
	Wondering at my need to be right (Preview) I can see it when it's happening. I know it's futile to argue, but there are times when it seems I just can't help it. And it's over the dumbest stuff. Usually because the topic of conversation shifts and my AH doesn't bother to tell me, then starts talking down to me when I express confusion and atte...	blender_girl	9	399	Jul 4, 2009 by kitty
	No longer with AH but still suffering (Preview) I wanted to share my story for some thoughts and experiences you all went through. I am no longer living with my AH and we are divorced a year ago...I know i dont want to get back to him and our marriage has made me discover so many deffects of character which i need to work on to be a healthier and happier pers...	koukou	8	978	Jul 4, 2009 by koukou
	Happy 4th of July! (Preview) (((((Family))))), A quick HAPPY 4th of JULY to all! Have a wonderful weekend. Celebrate the meaning of this day. I am so proud to be an American. To my military families thank you for doing what you do. Come home safe and sound to us. I am off to work for the entire weekend, but that's okay. I have lot...	Karilynn	0	295	Jul 4, 2009 by Karilynn
	Thanks To All That Travel Along Side...... (Preview) I appreciate every response to my question. There is a lot of love and wisdom here.	DreamsOver	2	653	Jul 4, 2009 by Jerry F
	Program working... (Preview) I tend to focus on the struggles I have and post to seek the invaluable support and ESH offered here. A situation occurred the other day and I wanted to share how it helped me to realize that the tools I am gaining spread to my Non-A interactions as well. The other night I ordered a pizza for pick up. It was...	Rora	6	736	Jul 4, 2009 by rosielightshines
	Changing the things I can (Preview) The time has come for me to make some changes. A few days of peace and quiet every few weeks is not enough for me to heal. Being in the same house the majority of the time simply takes its toll on me when my AH is drinking. I can detach most of the time, but sometimes the insanity just leaks in and takes hold....	blender_girl	5	1076	Jul 4, 2009 by rosielightshines
	My 1 year Alanon Anniversary (Preview) Hello and Hugs,This month makes one year since HP guided me to MIP. That is my #1 on my gratitude list today. Even though the last year has been a tough one, it has been one of the best ones. As many newbies do, I came here hopeless and desperate of learning how to deal with the alcoholic in my life. Wha...	Sincerely	6	933	Jul 3, 2009 by wp
	Met with lawyer today (Preview) Hi MIP family. Thought I would just keep you abreast of my situation and hold myself accountable at the same time. I met with the lawyer today and had all the information that I needed for him to file an uncontested divorce, except husband's address (which I have and forgot to bring) and social security...	Overcome	6	432	Jul 3, 2009 by crispin777
	Having Computer Problems (Preview) I am having trouble loading the chat room, because my computer says that my adobe reader is damaged and can't be fixed. I guess that somehow effects my Java from running and now I can't get into chat. I am going to take my computer to the "fix-it" guy, since I know nothing about computers and am...	Overcome	6	607	Jul 3, 2009 by danz123
	To change or not to change... (Preview) For some years now I have this friend who over and over and over again tells me that the one thing holding me back is the fact that I hold on to my married name. She goes as far as to tell me that all the powers on earth are working against me in that name. She tells me that until I relinquish this name I will alw...	Suzannah	8	526	Jul 3, 2009 by koukou
	Old habits die hard (Preview) I spent yesterday evening with a guy who I like well enough but not LIKE like, as we used to say. Fun. Not much too it. I don't particularly even care what he thinks of me. And yet here I am obsessing about what I should have said differently or not said or... or... or... LOL I swear, my brain does this on auto...	gngcrzy	1	475	Jul 2, 2009 by Codependent
	Husband in recovery....worse than ever (Preview) I don't know where to begin and I am almost to tired to think. I have not talked to him in almost 2 days. He is 3 weeks sober and seemingly doing great. But it also seems that i no longer have a place in his life now that he has found AA. He has checked himself in to a 12-step halfway house type place right dow...	crispin777	13	501	Jul 2, 2009 by crispin777
	New here and so sad (Preview) Hy husband is an alcoholic. He has tried AA and claims it doesn't work for him. Makes him feel like drinking more. He has tried to quit for about 5 years now. His older brother died of alcoholism and he says he's doomed to be just like him. The past 2 weeks he has gotten drunk every night - very drunk. I miss h...	smy922000	11	574	Jul 2, 2009 by blender_girl
	never been on a rollercoaster like this one! (Preview) I suppose it's normal to feel like you are on one, right? One day good, the next bad, then good and so on. No wonder we all feel like we are going crazy!! I thank God for this place. I think I have found, for me, what is going to keep me focused on me and my kids. Everytime I take the plunge and start to organize th...	beacheemom	9	642	Jul 2, 2009 by beacheemom
	my first f2f (Preview) I went to my first face to face meeting!!!!!!!!!! it took me a long time to get there but i did it and now i am looking forward to going back...i guess i thought if he would just quit drinking everything would be fine. he is now 2 years sober and I am certainly not fine....but i am ready to work on myself for a...	lam0204	3	736	Jul 2, 2009 by Overcome
	Back on here (Preview) I haven't posted in such a long time. But, I'm glad to be back on here. I will be updating and look foreword to talking to everyone. I missed you all! I hope everyone is doing ok. Christina	christinajeanne	3	371	Jul 2, 2009 by blender_girl
	Discovery and Choices (Preview) I woke up last night with a pit in my stomach. That has been happening to me a lot lately. But, instead of fretting about it I just spent time with God and went back to sleep. I felt a sense of peace come over me. Then yesterday as I was going to pick up my lunch I decided to go into a local bookstore. I ran into a fr...	christinajeanne	2	303	Jul 2, 2009 by Mobirdie
	Courage to Change (Preview) ****Sooo for me today this was a tough one... I went to the mail and got out my Test Results I have been dreading... For good reason... So Choles. was Up to 216... WOW... BAD Very BAD... BUT... On a good note, My Tryglycerides that at one time was up over 880... was down to 120.. Not Great But ALOT BETTER... S...	Jozie	3	518	Jul 2, 2009 by Jozie
	Testing.....Testing....Testing..... (Preview) Just checking to see if I can post yet! I can put things on the whiteboard. We'll see.	Karilynn	2	455	Jul 2, 2009 by Tofy
	A warm and sincere Mahalo (Preview) Aloha MIP Family...I am grateful that when I had to fall back on others for support you all were there!! It was 3+ hours before my spouse made it home and absolutely nothing I would have planned or expected or feared about came about. Every time I went to put my crown on along with my sword and shield I end...	Jerry F	11	552	Jul 1, 2009 by Suzannah
	How bad can it get? (Preview) Okay flights been delayed over 3 hours..... Instead to reacting I decided to come back here and hold myself still and read some more. How bad can it get? Actually after reading some of the post...this isn't even a knee jerk. Gratefully. (((((hugs)))))	Jerry F	9	854	Jul 1, 2009 by Suzannah
	I'll do it different this time... (Preview) The spouse is returning this afternoon from her annual family trip to the mainland. She called yesterday to tell me what time she would be at the Hilo Airport so that I could be there to pick her up suggesting that If I were to leave the house 10 minutes before she landed I could get there just after she got...	Jerry F	8	544	Jul 1, 2009 by Suzannah
	Should I make a call? (Preview) I feel like one of my husband's friends has been a terrible influence on him. Drinking and smoking pot all the time. And getting ahold of and bringing over other types of drugs that my husband never would have sought out on his own. There is a festival coming up this weekend. Previously I had gone with...	Eve55	9	514	Jul 1, 2009 by glad lee
	At the beginning, yet at the end (Preview) Hi all,I'm glad to have found this community to share and learn and I'm looking forward to meeting all of you. Where to begin...I'm 26 and I've been in a relationship with an alcoholic for two years now. The first year I didn't really notice the effects on him, or I just didn't take them too seriously. How...	JBee	8	534	Jul 1, 2009 by Jean4444
	very keyed up and angry (Preview) argh... people have been posting about this issue (their ABF or AH or AGF or AW in early recovery and acting like a horrible mess - and then slipping and then being awful again...) and i really don't want to rehash it but i kinda want to just vent. i'm going away for 5 days after work tomorrow. AH said he was...	xter	10	475	Jul 1, 2009 by Jean4444
	Hard to believe it.......I still can't believe it........ESH for those trying to Detach (Preview) Those of you who have followed my story/struggle/recovery the past 7 mths know where I came from and how miserably impossible it was for me to Detach... It will be two weeks this Thursday and for me that is a miracle and a blessing! There has been absolutely NC. ESABF dropped my stuff off last week and s...	shellyj123	8	544	Jul 1, 2009 by maresie
	Clarity of thinking after funeral (Preview) Dear All, went to funeral this evening, it was a quiet one, I guess alcoholics are only drawing a crowd when they are paying for drinks or providing the entertainment, I did not see many of the publicans who would have gained financially from this woman's death there, but hold it, its not to say they were...	maire rua	2	434	Jul 1, 2009 by maresie
	Overcoming procrastination. (Preview) I am on a roll in terms of decluttering and have some major projects to do. I need to get them done shortly as my life is going in many different directions now. I need to step up and take care of this. I am posting this so I have to make a update on the issue regularly. There is always something that gets in t...	maresie	6	431	Jul 1, 2009 by maresie
	Recommendation book Beautiful Boy. (Preview) I have just finished reading Beautiful Boy by David Scheff. The author and his son were on Oprah which is one reason I read the book. I think this is a great book if you are in early al anon. The author is a great writer and talks earnestly and passionately about the pain and anxiety of being involved with...	maresie	3	2639	Jul 1, 2009 by maresie
	A LITTLE BORED...BUT OK (Preview) I am finding myself to be a little bored lately. I try to keep busy but seem to still be bored. I am doing better this time of my life. I am getting along pretty well with my husband & somewhat better with my mom. Sometimes I just want to go to meetings again like I mentioned before without my mom there. O...	Hoot Nanny	3	361	Jun 30, 2009 by debilyn
	Free At Last (Preview) I just worked my 1st step "again" with my new sponsor. The first time, my A boyfriend was still active. Since he went into recovery and in a 1/2 house, I found myself wanting to take control and force solutions again especially after he broke off our 7 year relationship. What working th...	Pfunk	5	548	Jun 30, 2009 by canadianguy
	Trying So Hard..... (Preview) to hold on. My AS drives a very old beat up truck his father and I gave him several years ago, I had a very little hope (but some hope) at that time that he would take a job, but that hope has faded with his continuing drug use. The old truck is now dying, he called me yesterday in a fit saying he was going to run...	DreamsOver	4	500	Jun 30, 2009 by RLC
	how to focus on myself under my circumstances (Preview) As I am learning the ways of Al Anon, and digging deeper into the program, I am coming up with more questions I have. I know that I am supposed to focus more on me and stop the focusing on my AH. I didn't realize how hard this one would be for me. I don't want to sound like I am making excuses, I am just not sure how...	beacheemom	7	515	Jun 30, 2009 by maresie
	What am I not understanding?? in tears.... (Preview) Please clarify something for me. My aoca h is attending al anon. I am too, different group. His take on looking after him seems to be playing out as shutting me out. completely. He does not even talk to me, unless our kids are around. In fact, he seems to be 2 completely different people, totally depen...	heatherranki	6	522	Jun 30, 2009 by maresie
	death from alcoholism (Preview) Dear all, am a bit upset today, a lady I know died yesterday evening from chronic alcoholism, leaving her fourteen year old daughter behind. She was my age, 44, and I liked her though she was a messy drunk, she had good qualities but was afflicted with the disease, I am going to part of the funeral and I kno...	maire rua	7	492	Jun 30, 2009 by maresie
	My friends keep relapsing...Is this worth it? (Preview) Im in an "emotional growth program" for young adults with five students. It used to be six, but a close friend of mine relapsed and behaved in a way that got her kicked out. Im the only person here currently who doesn't struggle with addiction. For a lot of people, this is an after care afte...	waddleton	4	456	Jun 29, 2009 by kismetstrand
	My issues (Preview) I can see the red flags with guy I have been posting about. I can see all that, but what bothers me is he feeling of rejection I get after I have embarrassed myself by texting him over and over pretending I was stranded- well sort of pretending. While I know alcohol played a part in my persistence it was mo...	Codependent	1	315	Jun 29, 2009 by debilyn
	A quick hello and an invitation. (Preview) Hello my alanon family, just wanted to do a lil catch up as I have been MIA (lol that's my dog's name) from the board and rooms for a bit. I find myself stuggling to keep up with the work building up, home life, and trying to keep the focus on me. The day-to-day drama of living with addiciton and working on cha...	Mandy123	1	461	Jun 29, 2009 by belle1
	july 4th weekend is already making nervous- couple of ?'s (Preview) Well, I said in my last reply I was going to bed, but I really need to get this off of my chest. I think it's the reason that today just wasn't a moving forward kind of day. My AH has a friend that has a house on a lake about 1 hour away from our home. This friend is truly a good man. I know my AH will want me and our gir...	beacheemom	10	373	Jun 29, 2009 by Inpain
	programme slip (Preview) Hi all, I am feeling a bit ashamed. My AB has been sober for 2 months and is doing really well attending meetings, keeping in contact etc. I on the other hand am becoming very resentful after everything I have been through still feel very alone. As he gets better and better he seems to be out all the time...	Tracy	5	561	Jun 29, 2009 by rosielightshines
	{sigh} Expectations... (Preview) I didn't see this one coming. Some of you may have seen my earlier post. I was excited I made my first friend at al-anon and we were invited over for a cookout. It was seriously our first "dry" social event. We have three small children. My friend called and asked if it was ok to invite ano...	Inpain	5	502	Jun 29, 2009 by xter
	Addictions Hold... (Preview) The Biggest Liar was my own Addiction We have lived with dishonesty- in others and in ourselves. Many of us had to learn to cope with the ovcious lies accompanying our parents' dysfunction or the enabling of that dysfunction. One of the ways we coped was to convince ourselves that our perceptions were...	Jozie	1	447	Jun 29, 2009 by abbyal
	Needing Experience, Strengh and Hope (Preview) Hello, I'm new to the board but have been in and out of alanon for about 15 years only taking and seriously working my program for the last year. I have been doing great, loving my program, growing within myself and rebuilding a relationship with my recovering AA boyfriend of 7 years. My A lives in a 1/2...	Pfunk	4	817	Jun 29, 2009 by Pfunk
	Boy did I loose it! (Preview) ((((Family)))), Here I am my weekend off. I am sicker than a dog. and I'm trying to get better so that I can go to my niece's graduation today. I talked to both my sister and niece yesterday and said that I would most likely be at the graduation. However I wasn't sure if I could make it out to dinner. My s...	Karilynn	8	439	Jun 29, 2009 by Andrea12
	Dating (Preview) I hope I am not boring you all posting about my dating life, but it makes me feel better to get it out there and get feedback from you guys. After the text apology I sent a text on Thursday just casual and he responded. We didn't talk on Friday. But, Saturday I really wanted to see him. Was going out with...	Codependent	4	415	Jun 29, 2009 by brownmf
	Naranon chatrooms?? (Preview) Hi friends, my hub jsut got out of jail (15 months) and 2 months rehab for multiple dui's. He came outta jail with a new addiction..Hydro morphine, he snorts it..so i'm trying to find a room to talk to ppl that can relate to my situation..thanks xo Serenity62..not lol	serenity62	3	4437	Jun 29, 2009 by brownmf
	Need help Please!!!! (Preview) (((((((Everyone)))))))) I'm in need of some ES&H please. I am totally overwhelmed with stress. It seems that things keep piling up on me. I try to deal with one thing at a time but when one issue is resolved then 2 more roll in. I try to reach out to others that are close to me they appear to be disappoin...	shadow1	7	573	Jun 29, 2009 by Suzannah
	summer weekend festivals- yuck (Preview) I am back living in the American Midwest and in the summer there are always these weekend "fests" which are completely soaked in alcohol. Having not lived with this for awhile, I had forgotten how gross it is. I went to one last weekend and it all came back to me- totally smashed people all le...	Jean4444	3	316	Jun 28, 2009 by debilyn
	my STEP 3 on RE-parenting me (Preview) ASSIGNMENT__________ STEP 3---Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood him Self parenting step 3---Learn to let go of the compulsive self reliance by reaching out to our Higher Parent as we understand it ########Rosie's take "compulsive self relia...	rosielightshines	2	551	Jun 28, 2009 by debilyn
	what can i do? (Preview) Hi everyone, I have just found this board, or maybe it found me!!! I am so so desperate for some advice. My wife is 5 months pregnant, and she won't stop drinking... What the hell do i do??? From day one, i know she has made no secret that she will have a drink "every now and then". But, on Sunday,...	ajay147	7	845	Jun 28, 2009 by ajay147
	June Business Meeting Minutes (Preview) June Business meeting Minutes Meeting was held June 7, 2009 Meeting opened with the serenity prayer Motion to accept May Business Meeting Minutes as posted on the Board - Voted on and accepted Chair meeting schedule was posted and revisedCurrent Chair Schedule is:AMMon Shimo/no altTues -Aun...	ernie	0	433	Jun 28, 2009 by ernie
	Delusional husband plays games. (Preview) Some of you will remember my "checking for ticks" post, others might even remember my "I've had enough" post, under my old nick of Java, concerning my dry drunk husband. My most recent post was a decision I made to go back into the relationship entitled "doing the same thin...	Overcome	6	526	Jun 28, 2009 by Melissa21
	thanks (Preview) Thanks to all who replied to my post. happy that people bothered to reply. My husband is in rehab. Visited him each day this week and it was very nice and CALM!I was seeing some hope for a future, probably naively? Yesteray and today he was allowed home for a few hours and all we did was fight...over stupid...	Grace11	3	517	Jun 27, 2009 by Jerry F
	The REAL gift my AH gave me today... (Preview) for those of you that have read my posts know that one of the hardest things I was/am trying to overcome is my AH lack of motivation when it comes to our home. I had alot of anger and bitterness about this issue. Well, he texted me today and let me know that he bought a weed eater for our yard. This must sound s...	beacheemom	5	871	Jun 27, 2009 by beacheemom
	I've been offered an interview for a new job (Preview) So after my last post of presenting an emplyment contract and my seeing the audit to fruition, that went totally out the window. My ex-bf wouldn't sign anything and I stood my ground and walked out. The audit was today and he had to handle it by himself. I don't know the details of the results, only what he...	redfred	5	576	Jun 27, 2009 by rosielightshines
	FYI - Some of the legalities of my situation with my ex-bf (Preview) First of all, THANK YOU to everyone who has taken the time to follow my little soap opera on this message board and share some of your wisdom with me. So much is happening and it's happening so fast the I have only been able (emotionally and time wise) to post the most critical information for what's happe...	redfred	5	434	Jun 27, 2009 by rosielightshines
	Just For Today...report (Preview) I did not do all the things on my "to do" list and Just for that day, I didn't worry about it, I just did "the next right thing" One of the things that I added to my 'to do' list was taking my mom to another Assisted Living Facility (this makes the second one we've visited). She really li...	Overcome	3	376	Jun 27, 2009 by rosielightshines
	Need some love tonight... (Preview) Even though I know I am working hard, I am changing the things I can and I am accepting the things I cannot, today has been a really hard day. Physically pain is not helping from when my legs collapsed from under me late Monday night and I knocked myself out on my kitchen floor. The fact that I buried a dear d...	Suzannah	14	959	Jun 27, 2009 by Jozie
	At a loss (Preview) I have no idea what to do or where to go. I dated a recovering alcoholic for four years. Then around four years ago he was no longer recovering as he started drinking again. In a weird way it was sort of nice in the beginning because he was so relaxed with a few drinks. He had always found it difficult to relax...	Grace11	7	843	Jun 27, 2009 by Grace11
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.