Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Overcome · Overcome

(this may be found in the daily reader) -- Edited by tea2 on Wednesday 8th of July 2009 09:50:23 PM

Overcome · Overcome

An AA speaker at al Al-Anon meeting gave the members this unusual insight from the other side of the fence: "The non-alcohoilc in the family doesn't seem to realize that the alcoholic is in a terribly vulnerable position. He must be constantly on guard, because he knows, deep down inside, how mu...

xter · xter

i took a little trip to get away from AH and the insanity for a few days. day one was fantastic. day 2, less so. i was anxious and kept thinking how happy HE must be that i'm not there, how he's probably LOVING being without me for a few days. trying SO hard not to attempt to get into his head but... days 3-5...

Rora · Rora

I need some ESH on this topic. I can fully understand how taking care of ME will find me happiness - happiness that is right for ME. I understand how my choices and decisions need to reflect and be consistent with the consequences and outcomes that I want in my life. Where I struggle is in understanding th...

florida · florida

feeling like im fighting myself - havent been able to get out/get away by myself as i dont have my license (hopefully very soon) Boyfriend smokes to find his peace, also his religion. His smoking takes away any peace I may have at the moment How do you find your peace AND keep it? walking? nature? open to a...

Jean4444 · Jean4444

LAZY! I would rather procrastinate than go to my meeting- sleep in, be lazy, surf the web, etc. But that is always a clue that I need to get my butt in gear and get to a meeting. I did not go last week for the very same reason. Geez, what a battle it is sometimes with my own self! UGH! But, Ok, I am going, I g...

gknee · gknee

I've been thinking about the disease of alcoholism and trying to get my head around it more. I don't bristle as much when I call it a disease any longer BUT here's my issue. I'd love all of your ESH on it: If a diabetic eats candy bars and doesn't take his insulin (fully knowing that this is not good self care...

teddybearpoet · teddybearpoet

Ok.. I have been avoiding posting since i have been back in the room.. Have had a couple of people saying I should.. So here I am.. When i first came into this program.. I thought my biggest challenge was to learn how to live with alcoholism.. I knew I had alot of issues as well and knew there would be challe...

Tracy · Tracy

Hi, my daughter turns 13 today. I have promised her 4 her 16 we will visit america because her birthday is special in your country any ideas. Plus I plan to attend a convention next year with my AB if he is still sober want to go somewhere special all ideas appreciated. Hope you all have a lovely 4th July c...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

Went to bed feeling like I was truly blessed and woke up feeling the same. It's been two WHOLE weeks since I FINALLY reached the point of all out insanity and had to walk away from someone that I love, one of the hardest things I've ever had to do in my life. I walked away to save myself.....someone that I d...

Codependent · Codependent

Thanks for all of the support. I have been doing a lot of introspection and once again wind up scared of my weaknesses- scared that I haven't made as much progress as I wanted to. I still have my alcohol issues that I have not let go of. I still have intimacy and sex issues and loneliness and lack of trust...

gknee · gknee

Hi all.God- I hate 3 day holiday weekends!!! AH gets in a mood and it just keeps on giving. Here's the scenario today. AH leaves the house around 4- drops 16 y/o at work and then disappears. I hang out for a while , then head to grocery store to prep for planned picnics tomorrow (which I am beginning to beli...

gknee · gknee

Here's something positive:If I hadn't been working my program and just getting on with my day--despite what my AH was doing- this is what I would have missed out on:1) a 3 mile run2) a 4th of july parade with my kids and some old friends3) a visit with some former neighbors4) a wonderful picnic at my aunt...

N8SMOM · N8SMOM

I took a Service Position recently at my Saturday meeting. My job is to call the person who is chairing the meeting the night before to remind them. Well, my job started this month and I happen to be out of town - but I made sure to send myself an e-mail to remind me to call the people (one of them is the regul...

DreamsOver · DreamsOver

I have always had my faith to sustain me. I had it during the illness and death of both of my parents to whom I had a very close, loving relationships, during the diagnosis that my youngest son was Autistic, and when I suffered a severe case of depression, it has sustained me living with my oldest so...

Overcome · Overcome

(this share can be found in the daily reader) -- Edited by tea2 on Wednesday 8th of July 2009 09:29:06 PM

mary j · mary j

this is my first posting so sorry for any mistakes. i am trying to detach from my daughter cos i know after months trying i cannot help her. she's on another binge now and this is when i panic cos she often tells her friends she has taken an overdose cos she no longer wants to live, they panic an ring me, an...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

For the first time in ages, I feel like I am slowly finding my way back to my independant, self sufficient, happy, and confident self. The journey has been long and rough at times, and it continues and will continue forever, and I am happy and looking forward to each and every day of it. I've finally allo...

blender_girl · blender_girl

I can see it when it's happening. I know it's futile to argue, but there are times when it seems I just can't help it. And it's over the dumbest stuff. Usually because the topic of conversation shifts and my AH doesn't bother to tell me, then starts talking down to me when I express confusion and atte...

koukou · koukou

I wanted to share my story for some thoughts and experiences you all went through. I am no longer living with my AH and we are divorced a year ago...I know i dont want to get back to him and our marriage has made me discover so many deffects of character which i need to work on to be a healthier and happier pers...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((((Family))))), A quick HAPPY 4th of JULY to all! Have a wonderful weekend. Celebrate the meaning of this day. I am so proud to be an American. To my military families thank you for doing what you do. Come home safe and sound to us. I am off to work for the entire weekend, but that's okay. I have lot...

DreamsOver · DreamsOver

I appreciate every response to my question. There is a lot of love and wisdom here.

Rora · Rora

I tend to focus on the struggles I have and post to seek the invaluable support and ESH offered here. A situation occurred the other day and I wanted to share how it helped me to realize that the tools I am gaining spread to my Non-A interactions as well. The other night I ordered a pizza for pick up. It was...

blender_girl · blender_girl

The time has come for me to make some changes. A few days of peace and quiet every few weeks is not enough for me to heal. Being in the same house the majority of the time simply takes its toll on me when my AH is drinking. I can detach most of the time, but sometimes the insanity just leaks in and takes hold....

Sincerely · Sincerely

Hello and Hugs,This month makes one year since HP guided me to MIP. That is my #1 on my gratitude list today. Even though the last year has been a tough one, it has been one of the best ones. As many newbies do, I came here hopeless and desperate of learning how to deal with the alcoholic in my life. Wha...

Overcome · Overcome

Hi MIP family. Thought I would just keep you abreast of my situation and hold myself accountable at the same time. I met with the lawyer today and had all the information that I needed for him to file an uncontested divorce, except husband's address (which I have and forgot to bring) and social security...

Overcome · Overcome

I am having trouble loading the chat room, because my computer says that my adobe reader is damaged and can't be fixed. I guess that somehow effects my Java from running and now I can't get into chat. I am going to take my computer to the "fix-it" guy, since I know nothing about computers and am...

Suzannah · Suzannah

For some years now I have this friend who over and over and over again tells me that the one thing holding me back is the fact that I hold on to my married name. She goes as far as to tell me that all the powers on earth are working against me in that name. She tells me that until I relinquish this name I will alw...

gngcrzy · gngcrzy

I spent yesterday evening with a guy who I like well enough but not LIKE like, as we used to say. Fun. Not much too it. I don't particularly even care what he thinks of me. And yet here I am obsessing about what I should have said differently or not said or... or... or... LOL I swear, my brain does this on auto...

crispin777 · crispin777

I don't know where to begin and I am almost to tired to think. I have not talked to him in almost 2 days. He is 3 weeks sober and seemingly doing great. But it also seems that i no longer have a place in his life now that he has found AA. He has checked himself in to a 12-step halfway house type place right dow...

smy922000 · smy922000

Hy husband is an alcoholic. He has tried AA and claims it doesn't work for him. Makes him feel like drinking more. He has tried to quit for about 5 years now. His older brother died of alcoholism and he says he's doomed to be just like him. The past 2 weeks he has gotten drunk every night - very drunk. I miss h...

beacheemom · beacheemom

I suppose it's normal to feel like you are on one, right? One day good, the next bad, then good and so on. No wonder we all feel like we are going crazy!! I thank God for this place. I think I have found, for me, what is going to keep me focused on me and my kids. Everytime I take the plunge and start to organize th...

lam0204 · lam0204

I went to my first face to face meeting!!!!!!!!!! it took me a long time to get there but i did it and now i am looking forward to going back...i guess i thought if he would just quit drinking everything would be fine. he is now 2 years sober and I am certainly not fine....but i am ready to work on myself for a...

christinajeanne · christinajeanne

I haven't posted in such a long time. But, I'm glad to be back on here. I will be updating and look foreword to talking to everyone. I missed you all! I hope everyone is doing ok. Christina

christinajeanne · christinajeanne

I woke up last night with a pit in my stomach. That has been happening to me a lot lately. But, instead of fretting about it I just spent time with God and went back to sleep. I felt a sense of peace come over me. Then yesterday as I was going to pick up my lunch I decided to go into a local bookstore. I ran into a fr...

Jozie · Jozie

****Sooo for me today this was a tough one... I went to the mail and got out my Test Results I have been dreading... For good reason... So Choles. was Up to 216... WOW... BAD Very BAD... BUT... On a good note, My Tryglycerides that at one time was up over 880... was down to 120.. Not Great But ALOT BETTER... S...

Karilynn · Karilynn

Just checking to see if I can post yet! I can put things on the whiteboard. We'll see.

Jerry F · Jerry F

Aloha MIP Family...I am grateful that when I had to fall back on others for support you all were there!! It was 3+ hours before my spouse made it home and absolutely nothing I would have planned or expected or feared about came about. Every time I went to put my crown on along with my sword and shield I end...

Jerry F · Jerry F

Okay flights been delayed over 3 hours..... Instead to reacting I decided to come back here and hold myself still and read some more. How bad can it get? Actually after reading some of the post...this isn't even a knee jerk. Gratefully. (((((hugs)))))

Jerry F · Jerry F

The spouse is returning this afternoon from her annual family trip to the mainland. She called yesterday to tell me what time she would be at the Hilo Airport so that I could be there to pick her up suggesting that If I were to leave the house 10 minutes before she landed I could get there just after she got...

Eve55 · Eve55

I feel like one of my husband's friends has been a terrible influence on him. Drinking and smoking pot all the time. And getting ahold of and bringing over other types of drugs that my husband never would have sought out on his own. There is a festival coming up this weekend. Previously I had gone with...

JBee · JBee

Hi all,I'm glad to have found this community to share and learn and I'm looking forward to meeting all of you. Where to begin...I'm 26 and I've been in a relationship with an alcoholic for two years now. The first year I didn't really notice the effects on him, or I just didn't take them too seriously. How...

xter · xter

argh... people have been posting about this issue (their ABF or AH or AGF or AW in early recovery and acting like a horrible mess - and then slipping and then being awful again...) and i really don't want to rehash it but i kinda want to just vent. i'm going away for 5 days after work tomorrow. AH said he was...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

Those of you who have followed my story/struggle/recovery the past 7 mths know where I came from and how miserably impossible it was for me to Detach... It will be two weeks this Thursday and for me that is a miracle and a blessing! There has been absolutely NC. ESABF dropped my stuff off last week and s...

maire rua · maire rua

Dear All, went to funeral this evening, it was a quiet one, I guess alcoholics are only drawing a crowd when they are paying for drinks or providing the entertainment, I did not see many of the publicans who would have gained financially from this woman's death there, but hold it, its not to say they were...

maresie · maresie

I am on a roll in terms of decluttering and have some major projects to do. I need to get them done shortly as my life is going in many different directions now. I need to step up and take care of this. I am posting this so I have to make a update on the issue regularly. There is always something that gets in t...

maresie · maresie

I have just finished reading Beautiful Boy by David Scheff. The author and his son were on Oprah which is one reason I read the book. I think this is a great book if you are in early al anon. The author is a great writer and talks earnestly and passionately about the pain and anxiety of being involved with...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am finding myself to be a little bored lately. I try to keep busy but seem to still be bored. I am doing better this time of my life. I am getting along pretty well with my husband & somewhat better with my mom. Sometimes I just want to go to meetings again like I mentioned before without my mom there. O...

Pfunk · Pfunk

I just worked my 1st step "again" with my new sponsor. The first time, my A boyfriend was still active. Since he went into recovery and in a 1/2 house, I found myself wanting to take control and force solutions again especially after he broke off our 7 year relationship. What working th...

DreamsOver · DreamsOver

to hold on. My AS drives a very old beat up truck his father and I gave him several years ago, I had a very little hope (but some hope) at that time that he would take a job, but that hope has faded with his continuing drug use. The old truck is now dying, he called me yesterday in a fit saying he was going to run...

beacheemom · beacheemom

As I am learning the ways of Al Anon, and digging deeper into the program, I am coming up with more questions I have. I know that I am supposed to focus more on me and stop the focusing on my AH. I didn't realize how hard this one would be for me. I don't want to sound like I am making excuses, I am just not sure how...

heatherranki · heatherranki

Please clarify something for me. My aoca h is attending al anon. I am too, different group. His take on looking after him seems to be playing out as shutting me out. completely. He does not even talk to me, unless our kids are around. In fact, he seems to be 2 completely different people, totally depen...

maire rua · maire rua

Dear all, am a bit upset today, a lady I know died yesterday evening from chronic alcoholism, leaving her fourteen year old daughter behind. She was my age, 44, and I liked her though she was a messy drunk, she had good qualities but was afflicted with the disease, I am going to part of the funeral and I kno...

waddleton · waddleton

Im in an "emotional growth program" for young adults with five students. It used to be six, but a close friend of mine relapsed and behaved in a way that got her kicked out. Im the only person here currently who doesn't struggle with addiction. For a lot of people, this is an after care afte...

Codependent · Codependent

I can see the red flags with guy I have been posting about. I can see all that, but what bothers me is he feeling of rejection I get after I have embarrassed myself by texting him over and over pretending I was stranded- well sort of pretending. While I know alcohol played a part in my persistence it was mo...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hello my alanon family, just wanted to do a lil catch up as I have been MIA (lol that's my dog's name) from the board and rooms for a bit. I find myself stuggling to keep up with the work building up, home life, and trying to keep the focus on me. The day-to-day drama of living with addiciton and working on cha...

beacheemom · beacheemom

Well, I said in my last reply I was going to bed, but I really need to get this off of my chest. I think it's the reason that today just wasn't a moving forward kind of day. My AH has a friend that has a house on a lake about 1 hour away from our home. This friend is truly a good man. I know my AH will want me and our gir...

Tracy · Tracy

Hi all, I am feeling a bit ashamed. My AB has been sober for 2 months and is doing really well attending meetings, keeping in contact etc. I on the other hand am becoming very resentful after everything I have been through still feel very alone. As he gets better and better he seems to be out all the time...

Inpain · Inpain

I didn't see this one coming. Some of you may have seen my earlier post. I was excited I made my first friend at al-anon and we were invited over for a cookout. It was seriously our first "dry" social event. We have three small children. My friend called and asked if it was ok to invite ano...

Jozie · Jozie

The Biggest Liar was my own Addiction We have lived with dishonesty- in others and in ourselves. Many of us had to learn to cope with the ovcious lies accompanying our parents' dysfunction or the enabling of that dysfunction. One of the ways we coped was to convince ourselves that our perceptions were...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	July 6 reading from One Day At A Time in Al-Anon (Preview) (this may be found in the daily reader) -- Edited by tea2 on Wednesday 8th of July 2009 09:50:23 PM	Overcome	2	546	Jul 6, 2009 by wildthang86
	July 5th reading for One Day at a Time in Al-Anon (Preview) An AA speaker at al Al-Anon meeting gave the members this unusual insight from the other side of the fence: "The non-alcohoilc in the family doesn't seem to realize that the alcoholic is in a terribly vulnerable position. He must be constantly on guard, because he knows, deep down inside, how mu...	Overcome	3	973	Jul 6, 2009 by wildthang86
	took a geographical this weekend... (Preview) i took a little trip to get away from AH and the insanity for a few days. day one was fantastic. day 2, less so. i was anxious and kept thinking how happy HE must be that i'm not there, how he's probably LOVING being without me for a few days. trying SO hard not to attempt to get into his head but... days 3-5...	xter	1	720	Jul 6, 2009 by glad lee
	Happiness is an inside job... (Preview) I need some ESH on this topic. I can fully understand how taking care of ME will find me happiness - happiness that is right for ME. I understand how my choices and decisions need to reflect and be consistent with the consequences and outcomes that I want in my life. Where I struggle is in understanding th...	Rora	11	862	Jul 6, 2009 by beacheemom
	how do you find Peace? (Preview) feeling like im fighting myself - havent been able to get out/get away by myself as i dont have my license (hopefully very soon) Boyfriend smokes to find his peace, also his religion. His smoking takes away any peace I may have at the moment How do you find your peace AND keep it? walking? nature? open to a...	florida	7	1025	Jul 5, 2009 by nmike
	I don't want to go....but that means I really need to! (Preview) LAZY! I would rather procrastinate than go to my meeting- sleep in, be lazy, surf the web, etc. But that is always a clue that I need to get my butt in gear and get to a meeting. I did not go last week for the very same reason. Geez, what a battle it is sometimes with my own self! UGH! But, Ok, I am going, I g...	Jean4444	11	946	Jul 5, 2009 by nmike
	the disease thing (Preview) I've been thinking about the disease of alcoholism and trying to get my head around it more. I don't bristle as much when I call it a disease any longer BUT here's my issue. I'd love all of your ESH on it: If a diabetic eats candy bars and doesn't take his insulin (fully knowing that this is not good self care...	gknee	7	995	Jul 5, 2009 by Dave Harm
	Been wanting to hide out (Preview) Ok.. I have been avoiding posting since i have been back in the room.. Have had a couple of people saying I should.. So here I am.. When i first came into this program.. I thought my biggest challenge was to learn how to live with alcoholism.. I knew I had alot of issues as well and knew there would be challe...	teddybearpoet	4	755	Jul 5, 2009 by Sincerely
	daughter teenager today (Preview) Hi, my daughter turns 13 today. I have promised her 4 her 16 we will visit america because her birthday is special in your country any ideas. Plus I plan to attend a convention next year with my AB if he is still sober want to go somewhere special all ideas appreciated. Hope you all have a lovely 4th July c...	Tracy	2	544	Jul 5, 2009 by rosielightshines
	I'm expecting a miracle:)or should I say another one?:) (Preview) Went to bed feeling like I was truly blessed and woke up feeling the same. It's been two WHOLE weeks since I FINALLY reached the point of all out insanity and had to walk away from someone that I love, one of the hardest things I've ever had to do in my life. I walked away to save myself.....someone that I d...	shellyj123	5	750	Jul 5, 2009 by Lilly Burn
	Scared of myself (Preview) Thanks for all of the support. I have been doing a lot of introspection and once again wind up scared of my weaknesses- scared that I haven't made as much progress as I wanted to. I still have my alcohol issues that I have not let go of. I still have intimacy and sex issues and loneliness and lack of trust...	Codependent	7	681	Jul 5, 2009 by TerryTrains
	Sanity check (Preview) Hi all.God- I hate 3 day holiday weekends!!! AH gets in a mood and it just keeps on giving. Here's the scenario today. AH leaves the house around 4- drops 16 y/o at work and then disappears. I hang out for a while , then head to grocery store to prep for planned picnics tomorrow (which I am beginning to beli...	gknee	6	792	Jul 5, 2009 by MrsGratitude
	Gratitude (Preview) Here's something positive:If I hadn't been working my program and just getting on with my day--despite what my AH was doing- this is what I would have missed out on:1) a 3 mile run2) a 4th of july parade with my kids and some old friends3) a visit with some former neighbors4) a wonderful picnic at my aunt...	gknee	4	667	Jul 5, 2009 by glad lee
	Had to Laugh (Preview) I took a Service Position recently at my Saturday meeting. My job is to call the person who is chairing the meeting the night before to remind them. Well, my job started this month and I happen to be out of town - but I made sure to send myself an e-mail to remind me to call the people (one of them is the regul...	N8SMOM	2	750	Jul 5, 2009 by Jerry F
	What Do You Do When You Start To Lose Your Faith? (Preview) I have always had my faith to sustain me. I had it during the illness and death of both of my parents to whom I had a very close, loving relationships, during the diagnosis that my youngest son was Autistic, and when I suffered a severe case of depression, it has sustained me living with my oldest so...	DreamsOver	10	1043	Jul 4, 2009 by DD
	July 4th reading from One Day at a Time in Al-Anon (Preview) (this share can be found in the daily reader) -- Edited by tea2 on Wednesday 8th of July 2009 09:29:06 PM	Overcome	1	557	Jul 4, 2009 by redfred
	so sad (Preview) this is my first posting so sorry for any mistakes. i am trying to detach from my daughter cos i know after months trying i cannot help her. she's on another binge now and this is when i panic cos she often tells her friends she has taken an overdose cos she no longer wants to live, they panic an ring me, an...	mary j	11	930	Jul 4, 2009 by mary j
	Independance Day (Preview) For the first time in ages, I feel like I am slowly finding my way back to my independant, self sufficient, happy, and confident self. The journey has been long and rough at times, and it continues and will continue forever, and I am happy and looking forward to each and every day of it. I've finally allo...	shellyj123	0	371	Jul 4, 2009 by shellyj123
	Wondering at my need to be right (Preview) I can see it when it's happening. I know it's futile to argue, but there are times when it seems I just can't help it. And it's over the dumbest stuff. Usually because the topic of conversation shifts and my AH doesn't bother to tell me, then starts talking down to me when I express confusion and atte...	blender_girl	9	443	Jul 4, 2009 by kitty
	No longer with AH but still suffering (Preview) I wanted to share my story for some thoughts and experiences you all went through. I am no longer living with my AH and we are divorced a year ago...I know i dont want to get back to him and our marriage has made me discover so many deffects of character which i need to work on to be a healthier and happier pers...	koukou	8	1023	Jul 4, 2009 by koukou
	Happy 4th of July! (Preview) (((((Family))))), A quick HAPPY 4th of JULY to all! Have a wonderful weekend. Celebrate the meaning of this day. I am so proud to be an American. To my military families thank you for doing what you do. Come home safe and sound to us. I am off to work for the entire weekend, but that's okay. I have lot...	Karilynn	0	341	Jul 4, 2009 by Karilynn
	Thanks To All That Travel Along Side...... (Preview) I appreciate every response to my question. There is a lot of love and wisdom here.	DreamsOver	2	700	Jul 4, 2009 by Jerry F
	Program working... (Preview) I tend to focus on the struggles I have and post to seek the invaluable support and ESH offered here. A situation occurred the other day and I wanted to share how it helped me to realize that the tools I am gaining spread to my Non-A interactions as well. The other night I ordered a pizza for pick up. It was...	Rora	6	787	Jul 4, 2009 by rosielightshines
	Changing the things I can (Preview) The time has come for me to make some changes. A few days of peace and quiet every few weeks is not enough for me to heal. Being in the same house the majority of the time simply takes its toll on me when my AH is drinking. I can detach most of the time, but sometimes the insanity just leaks in and takes hold....	blender_girl	5	1129	Jul 4, 2009 by rosielightshines
	My 1 year Alanon Anniversary (Preview) Hello and Hugs,This month makes one year since HP guided me to MIP. That is my #1 on my gratitude list today. Even though the last year has been a tough one, it has been one of the best ones. As many newbies do, I came here hopeless and desperate of learning how to deal with the alcoholic in my life. Wha...	Sincerely	6	987	Jul 3, 2009 by wp
	Met with lawyer today (Preview) Hi MIP family. Thought I would just keep you abreast of my situation and hold myself accountable at the same time. I met with the lawyer today and had all the information that I needed for him to file an uncontested divorce, except husband's address (which I have and forgot to bring) and social security...	Overcome	6	480	Jul 3, 2009 by crispin777
	Having Computer Problems (Preview) I am having trouble loading the chat room, because my computer says that my adobe reader is damaged and can't be fixed. I guess that somehow effects my Java from running and now I can't get into chat. I am going to take my computer to the "fix-it" guy, since I know nothing about computers and am...	Overcome	6	652	Jul 3, 2009 by danz123
	To change or not to change... (Preview) For some years now I have this friend who over and over and over again tells me that the one thing holding me back is the fact that I hold on to my married name. She goes as far as to tell me that all the powers on earth are working against me in that name. She tells me that until I relinquish this name I will alw...	Suzannah	8	585	Jul 3, 2009 by koukou
	Old habits die hard (Preview) I spent yesterday evening with a guy who I like well enough but not LIKE like, as we used to say. Fun. Not much too it. I don't particularly even care what he thinks of me. And yet here I am obsessing about what I should have said differently or not said or... or... or... LOL I swear, my brain does this on auto...	gngcrzy	1	523	Jul 2, 2009 by Codependent
	Husband in recovery....worse than ever (Preview) I don't know where to begin and I am almost to tired to think. I have not talked to him in almost 2 days. He is 3 weeks sober and seemingly doing great. But it also seems that i no longer have a place in his life now that he has found AA. He has checked himself in to a 12-step halfway house type place right dow...	crispin777	13	551	Jul 2, 2009 by crispin777
	New here and so sad (Preview) Hy husband is an alcoholic. He has tried AA and claims it doesn't work for him. Makes him feel like drinking more. He has tried to quit for about 5 years now. His older brother died of alcoholism and he says he's doomed to be just like him. The past 2 weeks he has gotten drunk every night - very drunk. I miss h...	smy922000	11	620	Jul 2, 2009 by blender_girl
	never been on a rollercoaster like this one! (Preview) I suppose it's normal to feel like you are on one, right? One day good, the next bad, then good and so on. No wonder we all feel like we are going crazy!! I thank God for this place. I think I have found, for me, what is going to keep me focused on me and my kids. Everytime I take the plunge and start to organize th...	beacheemom	9	692	Jul 2, 2009 by beacheemom
	my first f2f (Preview) I went to my first face to face meeting!!!!!!!!!! it took me a long time to get there but i did it and now i am looking forward to going back...i guess i thought if he would just quit drinking everything would be fine. he is now 2 years sober and I am certainly not fine....but i am ready to work on myself for a...	lam0204	3	783	Jul 2, 2009 by Overcome
	Back on here (Preview) I haven't posted in such a long time. But, I'm glad to be back on here. I will be updating and look foreword to talking to everyone. I missed you all! I hope everyone is doing ok. Christina	christinajeanne	3	423	Jul 2, 2009 by blender_girl
	Discovery and Choices (Preview) I woke up last night with a pit in my stomach. That has been happening to me a lot lately. But, instead of fretting about it I just spent time with God and went back to sleep. I felt a sense of peace come over me. Then yesterday as I was going to pick up my lunch I decided to go into a local bookstore. I ran into a fr...	christinajeanne	2	352	Jul 2, 2009 by Mobirdie
	Courage to Change (Preview) ****Sooo for me today this was a tough one... I went to the mail and got out my Test Results I have been dreading... For good reason... So Choles. was Up to 216... WOW... BAD Very BAD... BUT... On a good note, My Tryglycerides that at one time was up over 880... was down to 120.. Not Great But ALOT BETTER... S...	Jozie	3	564	Jul 2, 2009 by Jozie
	Testing.....Testing....Testing..... (Preview) Just checking to see if I can post yet! I can put things on the whiteboard. We'll see.	Karilynn	2	505	Jul 2, 2009 by Tofy
	A warm and sincere Mahalo (Preview) Aloha MIP Family...I am grateful that when I had to fall back on others for support you all were there!! It was 3+ hours before my spouse made it home and absolutely nothing I would have planned or expected or feared about came about. Every time I went to put my crown on along with my sword and shield I end...	Jerry F	11	601	Jul 1, 2009 by Suzannah
	How bad can it get? (Preview) Okay flights been delayed over 3 hours..... Instead to reacting I decided to come back here and hold myself still and read some more. How bad can it get? Actually after reading some of the post...this isn't even a knee jerk. Gratefully. (((((hugs)))))	Jerry F	9	909	Jul 1, 2009 by Suzannah
	I'll do it different this time... (Preview) The spouse is returning this afternoon from her annual family trip to the mainland. She called yesterday to tell me what time she would be at the Hilo Airport so that I could be there to pick her up suggesting that If I were to leave the house 10 minutes before she landed I could get there just after she got...	Jerry F	8	602	Jul 1, 2009 by Suzannah
	Should I make a call? (Preview) I feel like one of my husband's friends has been a terrible influence on him. Drinking and smoking pot all the time. And getting ahold of and bringing over other types of drugs that my husband never would have sought out on his own. There is a festival coming up this weekend. Previously I had gone with...	Eve55	9	564	Jul 1, 2009 by glad lee
	At the beginning, yet at the end (Preview) Hi all,I'm glad to have found this community to share and learn and I'm looking forward to meeting all of you. Where to begin...I'm 26 and I've been in a relationship with an alcoholic for two years now. The first year I didn't really notice the effects on him, or I just didn't take them too seriously. How...	JBee	8	584	Jul 1, 2009 by Jean4444
	very keyed up and angry (Preview) argh... people have been posting about this issue (their ABF or AH or AGF or AW in early recovery and acting like a horrible mess - and then slipping and then being awful again...) and i really don't want to rehash it but i kinda want to just vent. i'm going away for 5 days after work tomorrow. AH said he was...	xter	10	522	Jul 1, 2009 by Jean4444
	Hard to believe it.......I still can't believe it........ESH for those trying to Detach (Preview) Those of you who have followed my story/struggle/recovery the past 7 mths know where I came from and how miserably impossible it was for me to Detach... It will be two weeks this Thursday and for me that is a miracle and a blessing! There has been absolutely NC. ESABF dropped my stuff off last week and s...	shellyj123	8	589	Jul 1, 2009 by maresie
	Clarity of thinking after funeral (Preview) Dear All, went to funeral this evening, it was a quiet one, I guess alcoholics are only drawing a crowd when they are paying for drinks or providing the entertainment, I did not see many of the publicans who would have gained financially from this woman's death there, but hold it, its not to say they were...	maire rua	2	487	Jul 1, 2009 by maresie
	Overcoming procrastination. (Preview) I am on a roll in terms of decluttering and have some major projects to do. I need to get them done shortly as my life is going in many different directions now. I need to step up and take care of this. I am posting this so I have to make a update on the issue regularly. There is always something that gets in t...	maresie	6	481	Jul 1, 2009 by maresie
	Recommendation book Beautiful Boy. (Preview) I have just finished reading Beautiful Boy by David Scheff. The author and his son were on Oprah which is one reason I read the book. I think this is a great book if you are in early al anon. The author is a great writer and talks earnestly and passionately about the pain and anxiety of being involved with...	maresie	3	2887	Jul 1, 2009 by maresie
	A LITTLE BORED...BUT OK (Preview) I am finding myself to be a little bored lately. I try to keep busy but seem to still be bored. I am doing better this time of my life. I am getting along pretty well with my husband & somewhat better with my mom. Sometimes I just want to go to meetings again like I mentioned before without my mom there. O...	Hoot Nanny	3	408	Jun 30, 2009 by debilyn
	Free At Last (Preview) I just worked my 1st step "again" with my new sponsor. The first time, my A boyfriend was still active. Since he went into recovery and in a 1/2 house, I found myself wanting to take control and force solutions again especially after he broke off our 7 year relationship. What working th...	Pfunk	5	623	Jun 30, 2009 by canadianguy
	Trying So Hard..... (Preview) to hold on. My AS drives a very old beat up truck his father and I gave him several years ago, I had a very little hope (but some hope) at that time that he would take a job, but that hope has faded with his continuing drug use. The old truck is now dying, he called me yesterday in a fit saying he was going to run...	DreamsOver	4	549	Jun 30, 2009 by RLC
	how to focus on myself under my circumstances (Preview) As I am learning the ways of Al Anon, and digging deeper into the program, I am coming up with more questions I have. I know that I am supposed to focus more on me and stop the focusing on my AH. I didn't realize how hard this one would be for me. I don't want to sound like I am making excuses, I am just not sure how...	beacheemom	7	561	Jun 30, 2009 by maresie
	What am I not understanding?? in tears.... (Preview) Please clarify something for me. My aoca h is attending al anon. I am too, different group. His take on looking after him seems to be playing out as shutting me out. completely. He does not even talk to me, unless our kids are around. In fact, he seems to be 2 completely different people, totally depen...	heatherranki	6	578	Jun 30, 2009 by maresie
	death from alcoholism (Preview) Dear all, am a bit upset today, a lady I know died yesterday evening from chronic alcoholism, leaving her fourteen year old daughter behind. She was my age, 44, and I liked her though she was a messy drunk, she had good qualities but was afflicted with the disease, I am going to part of the funeral and I kno...	maire rua	7	551	Jun 30, 2009 by maresie
	My friends keep relapsing...Is this worth it? (Preview) Im in an "emotional growth program" for young adults with five students. It used to be six, but a close friend of mine relapsed and behaved in a way that got her kicked out. Im the only person here currently who doesn't struggle with addiction. For a lot of people, this is an after care afte...	waddleton	4	504	Jun 29, 2009 by kismetstrand
	My issues (Preview) I can see the red flags with guy I have been posting about. I can see all that, but what bothers me is he feeling of rejection I get after I have embarrassed myself by texting him over and over pretending I was stranded- well sort of pretending. While I know alcohol played a part in my persistence it was mo...	Codependent	1	366	Jun 29, 2009 by debilyn
	A quick hello and an invitation. (Preview) Hello my alanon family, just wanted to do a lil catch up as I have been MIA (lol that's my dog's name) from the board and rooms for a bit. I find myself stuggling to keep up with the work building up, home life, and trying to keep the focus on me. The day-to-day drama of living with addiciton and working on cha...	Mandy123	1	506	Jun 29, 2009 by belle1
	july 4th weekend is already making nervous- couple of ?'s (Preview) Well, I said in my last reply I was going to bed, but I really need to get this off of my chest. I think it's the reason that today just wasn't a moving forward kind of day. My AH has a friend that has a house on a lake about 1 hour away from our home. This friend is truly a good man. I know my AH will want me and our gir...	beacheemom	10	419	Jun 29, 2009 by Inpain
	programme slip (Preview) Hi all, I am feeling a bit ashamed. My AB has been sober for 2 months and is doing really well attending meetings, keeping in contact etc. I on the other hand am becoming very resentful after everything I have been through still feel very alone. As he gets better and better he seems to be out all the time...	Tracy	5	611	Jun 29, 2009 by rosielightshines
	{sigh} Expectations... (Preview) I didn't see this one coming. Some of you may have seen my earlier post. I was excited I made my first friend at al-anon and we were invited over for a cookout. It was seriously our first "dry" social event. We have three small children. My friend called and asked if it was ok to invite ano...	Inpain	5	552	Jun 29, 2009 by xter
	Addictions Hold... (Preview) The Biggest Liar was my own Addiction We have lived with dishonesty- in others and in ourselves. Many of us had to learn to cope with the ovcious lies accompanying our parents' dysfunction or the enabling of that dysfunction. One of the ways we coped was to convince ourselves that our perceptions were...	Jozie	1	517	Jun 29, 2009 by abbyal
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.