Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

shellyj123 · shellyj123

Woke up this am and went straight to my am daily readers of which there are 3-lol! Not sure which one but one talked about Just for Today and how this 24 hour period was all I have to work with and all the wonderful ways I could enjoy it. I decided right then and there that that is just what I would do. No crazy...

Inpain · Inpain

I just wanted to say thanks to everyone here that comes on and takes time to respond to posts. For me, it has helped tremendously. I can't always get to F2F meetings, even though I prefer that, b/c I have little ones at home, and scheduling is difficult. This board is so helpful for those moments of exp...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((Family))), So sad once again the news this morning reported that the woman who killed 8 people in a car crash was drunk & high. What a waste. What will it take for people to wake up and realize that this is a disease? That people need help and that we owe it to future generations to educate, regul...

Inpain · Inpain

This statement sucks. I know it. I hate it but it's true. There was a day we had this discussion in a F2F meeting. If you're new to al-anon (as I am) our members suggested backup plans. So, one member had the expectation her husband would remain sober as they worked on cleaning out a house. He didn't...

Overcome · Overcome

I just got a call from my husband that he was coming back from the ER (we are seperated going through a divorce). He said that he went to open a beer and couldn't swallow it and new he was in trouble. He has no insurance, so after going to several hospitals he found one that would take him and he said they didn'...

ticswife · ticswife

Hello All, I am new here and not really sure where to even start...I am married to an A but I am sure I dont have to tell anyone here how our life together has went for the past 4 years because if there is an A in your life you know all about the lies, the stealing,the covering up, the disappointment, the tr...

kristielaine · kristielaine

Today is a really hard day. I'm very depressed and scared. I woke up crying because I feel so used and violated. I can hardly cope here at work. I just can't understand how someone can be such a horrible human being to treat anyone the way I was treated and have no remorse. I'm also depressed because I allow...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

Good news! I got a job. I will be moving to Goodyear, AZ at the end of this month. I will be working with the forclosure sector and rehabilitating the neighborhoods that have melted in the forclosure fiasco. I need help. For the life of me, I can't find any contact information re meetings in the area. God k...

Princess8899 · Princess8899

Last month, after 5 long months of fighting and begging him to tell me who he was having an affair with, I threw my husband of 10 years out of the house. I quickly confirmed my worst fears that he had been cheating on me since February with a girl who shares his fairly recently discovered spiritual beliefs...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Boyfriend and I broke up, it's over for good he says... no explanation. One day he loved me with all his heart and two days later he didn't love me anymore - or so he says. So I'm trying to right myself again, realize that I leaned too hard on a rotten post and fell down again. I'm still brushing myself off...

Tracy · Tracy

Last night when my sober ABF went to his meeting I was on the computer and looked up co-dependency on you tube. It was like a cloud of denial was lifted. I found myself crying for all the pain I HAVE PUT MYSELF THROUGH. THE words self sacrificing jummped out at me. That is what I have done all my life put e...

Overcome · Overcome

Sponsorship was a topic for tonight's meeting and since no one shared on it, I thought I would post a topic on it. I have been doing a lot of reading in the ODAAT in Al-Anon and Courage to Change, mediation books on this topic. It is a very important one and one that shouldn't be taken lightly if you are asked...

ajay147 · ajay147

I can't think straight anymore. My head hurts! What are my choices? Me and my wife (an A in denial), are about to break up. She hasn't really spoken to me in 10 days now. Since she found out that I told our doctor that she's still drinking, even at almost 6 months pregnant. This is my problem: We have two kids...

sad4life · sad4life

I have posted before but under a different name, which I can't remember. Today I am distraught, as I was yesterday, last week, last year, two years ago. I have been 'hanging on' to a dry drunk who left my family, (we have a 5 year old son together) and moved countries. For the last 2 years I have wanted to b...

imasharm · imasharm

OK, this is new to me. I really don't know if my husband is an alcoholic. I know he drinks everyday and is so obnoxious i can't stand him when he is drinking. His drinking doesn't affect his work, he doesn't drink in the morning or anything like that. It is the same routine everyday. After work he stops for a...

kristielaine · kristielaine

Just as I thought I feel better, I'm back to being sad. I'm getting sick of myself at this point

Joanie · Joanie

Hi there- Im new to all of this so am getting my feet wet- glad to have found this board. My husband wants to save our family and get his drinking under control but it is a bumpy road and he has been in therapy about 6 weeks. We have a LOT of underlying stress (child with cancer) that has caused him to progre...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hello family, I made a boo-boo. In my post yesterday I said that it was page 174 in C2C, actually it is 74. That's what I get for quoting a page from a book when the book was home and I was not :) Yours in recovery, Mandy

Mariner · Mariner

Dear (((All))) My name is Carol and I'm codependant I was reading an earlier post by Tracy and was prompted to post the following 'check list' for codependancy. When I first read this list it was with great amazement. I could put a tick next to every statement I thought THATS ME! All of it applied to...

kristielaine · kristielaine

Thanks everyone. Slowly I'm starting see the light. I had a chat with a board member on the AA board, and started talking about how on our birthdays, this month he wanted to get a hotel room. well he wanted to invite this guy that I don't like, who is an alcoholic, and his friends girlfriend, and I remember...

kristielaine · kristielaine

Can you help me think my way through this please, because this is what keeps me lingering on this entire issue with my EAB because of the way he left it. This is what transpired the week leading to our breakup. That Tuesday before our breakup, he and his mother had some sort of big argument where she confir...

Inpain · Inpain

In my honest opinion, it's far easier said than done. For 8 months I've struggled with that. I might have a difference of opinion here to on the interpretation of "letting go" - but for me, it means letting go of HIS actions. The consequences to his actions are MY responsibility. For exam...

david62 · david62

Hi ((((Family)))) I just had a moment I have to tell about. I spent most of the day today in San Antonio playing. I had a great time and was pulling back into my hometown about 9 o'clock. I am tired, but was trying to decide if I wanted to pull into the video store near my house to rent a movie to "watch&...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hi all,I saw once again how working your program can really scare your A and just had to share. My addict husband went over to the neighbors Sunday night and came back and said he was going to walk up the little convenience store and buy the neighbor a beer for his birthday. I said ok and went about my busine...

Aloha · Aloha

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/08/02/fashion/02love.html

N8SMOM · N8SMOM

Long after reading ODAT and C2C today, I realized that I had read the wrong date. Apparently, the error occurred yesterday when I skipped August 3 and went right to August 4. This may seem like a minor problem to most, but for me, it has me confused. Should I read August 3's reading tomorrow and then be...

malady · malady

My husband has been inactive for only 18 days for the first time in 35 years. I have only known him 10 years and during this time he has never gone any longer than 3 days without drinking. I realize now that the withdrawl symptoms were too much for him to bare so he went right back to it. He finally admitted h...

FlyingSquirrel · FlyingSquirrel

Is there NOTHING I can do? We've been separated for almost 11 months now but still communicate daily and see each other once or twice a week. I am now 5 and a half months sober. She knows she has a problem but is prejudiced against A.A. because she thinks she already knows everything about it (her dad is a...

beacheemom · beacheemom

When an A stops drinking, are they able to express their love for you better, or does that get worse? He thinks he is, even though I've expressed to him what I need from him, things dont change. You all know the dilemma on our sleeping situation, I've made several posts lately, and he emailed me and said it...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

I remember the first time I read that I thought WOW! How can so few words hold soooo much insight. I remember coming here and being told if I didn't like the way I was feeling to try doing the opposite of what I had been doing and again thought WOW....pretty insightful. Today I am at a wall.......and I eithe...

katiecat · katiecat

Same old scenario with me and my sister. She gets drunk and I get worried and want to take care of her. She has two addictions alcohol and gambling. I don't even know how she's going to pay her rent. Oh and yes I had to drive over there(45 minutes) to see if she was alright and take her to lunch so that she...

debilyn · debilyn

I got up at five thirty, drove all the way there with no pain pills. Was all in a dress, did everything I could to my girl body to look ok. Everyone has to fill out an app. to visit someone in prison. Mine should have been done. Guess what, they screwed up. Typical eh? Administration is a joke. So I waited as th...

kristielaine · kristielaine

I text him and said "I hope to God that you are getting help - spare me with a violent response - goodbye". Now I feel bad and set myself up for the fact that he won't respond. I guess I'm just angry because everyone got to say what they needed to say but me. He said his peace, my family said what they...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

I have made peace--sorta--with everything I'm gonna tell you. Right now I'm still processing through the feelings. But I'm alive, sober, living in the solution, and it's all b/c of y'all. After I lost the job in KS, there was 1 more interview I had: Baylor University, Waco, TX. After a 10 minute interv...

HG · HG

After 15 years together, my A and I have separated. His drinking didn't become a problem until the last 4 years, during which time he's logged a total of 120 days inpatient treatment (28 days program, then later, a 90-day transitional living program). He also went to 3 different outpatient treatme...

Jerry F · Jerry F

I'm grieving. One of our local 15 year old female died of apparent alcohol poisoning. I wanna scream and throw a tantrum!!!! I'll end up outside doing a chant to HP. HP knows. HP hears me. I don't need further proof. This is a grievable offense and so that is what happens with me. I've worked with t...

Jozie · Jozie

Welperz... Yesterday was the start of my Son's Practice for Soccer, and My SIL & I desided to make a go of it, and while they practiced we would "Walk" for a Healthier US... She too is in Al-anon Program... Well honestly I looked forward to it all day... We walked to her Aunts to find out wh...

Overcome · Overcome

Well it's 11:40 p.m. I guess it's still officially August 3, so I can share on what the C2C reading on Aug. 3th meant to me. I must start with the beginning sentence, "There was a time in my life when I furiously insisted that alcoholism did not exist in my family." I remember being at a Thanksgi...

ESH · ESH

A-bf has been in hospital x 4 weeks now... 2-weeks in ICU and 2-weeks on a floor. He had had so much alcohol and pain-killers in his body that his liver and kidneys shut down. He then went into heart failure; had pneumonia and 2 other infections. Has needed transfusions and dialysis. He is still very w...

Inpain · Inpain

No really. I've been recognizing when and how my life has been controlled and how I control. My AH-sober-dry drunk (not b/c he wants to but because he wants to stay with his family) decided after watching a reality show on baking cakes, that he wanted to bake one. I had to secrety laugh to myself but to...

newbelief · newbelief

Hi everyone, I don't really ever post on the board but that doesn't mean I don't work my program, I am often in online meetings, f2f, and do my daily readings, but have a really hard time sharing sometimes. Well, right now I really need some support, as I just came back from a week long business trip to Cal...

kristielaine · kristielaine

I want to call him so bad, I want him to know how much he hurt me, but I want to know he's not angry with me. What is wrong with me!! I'm shaking, crying, my stomach hurts. There is absolutely nothing positive to go back to him for but I need to hear his voice :(

Cashey100 · Cashey100

Hi... I posted earlier that I got blasted from my folks for losing my wallet. I appreciated all your support! Those of you who said that I shouldn't be giving my parents stuff to worry about-- you're right. I will try to stick to this and watch my speech around them. The way it goes is that anything tha...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

To update everyone, the new friend "M" of the EXABF emailed me today to let me know pretty much that she emailed EXABF last night and told him that she was sorry but wasn't ready to start dating right now and her daughters didn't want her too, and that there was to much drama in his life that she d...

Overcome · Overcome

In todays ODAAT in Al-Anon reading, August 1, it talks about how sometimes we think that by running away from our problems that all could be solved. I know I have tried this approach myself and can attest to the fact that it does not work. When I first married at 19 to an active drinker, I had no idea what alc...

beacheemom · beacheemom

hi all, confused on alot of things right now. Maybe someone has some answers for me as to what is going on with me. I know this is long (most of mine are -lol) a few nights ago, AH came to bed with me for two nights and it was wonderful- yes, he was still drinking, but there was intimacy, a feeling of closeness w...

peacewithin · peacewithin

I hope this is ok to write on here because it helps you focus on yourself. I read this book 20 wishes by Debbie Macomber it was so good. After reading it I started my list. Its making me so happy and i"m doing the things I want and taking time for my self. I have not thought about doing things I want to d...

Karilynn · Karilynn

Old African Proverb: "Advise and counsel him. If he does not listen, Let adversity teach him." Live strong, Karilynn & Pipers Kitty -- Edited by Karilynn on Monday 3rd of August 2009 10:45:19 AM -- Edited by Karilynn on Monday 3rd of August 2009 10:47:39 AM

Jozie · Jozie

Been working out some much needed things in my mind & heart these last couple weeks. Haven't been here quite as much as usual, however I know that If I don't get "ME" back on track, I am going to stay "STUCK" and I don't want that... My boy turned 12 yesterday, and after spending...

glad · glad

My sponsor keeps telling me I need to love my A for who he is and accept him as he is. When I ask my boyfriend what it meant that he bought me a $1, 200 gift (that represents alot of money to us) even though he had just said he "wasn't so sure about us", he acts offended and he said" I'm not gonn...

drucilla06 · drucilla06

Choices Such a small word but such a life changer. My AH-sober is struggling right now with not being happy in his job.Tonite when we were watching tv he said " I hate my job".This is due to a change in his job that was not of his doing.He has gone from being ok with it to hating it to being ok with it...

kristielaine · kristielaine

I know this is my first weekend without him. But last night I had a hard time, it was like I was going through withdrawals or something, and I wasn't the one who drank. I couldn't sleep, I was hurting all over and shaking. I haven't heard from him and I'm not calling or contacting him, even though the pit of...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((Family))), At what age is it appropriate to tell a child about a parent's addiction? Here's what's going on. Yesterday my older niece "Laura" called me to tell me her Dad stole her car while she was with her Mom & younger sister "Lisa" white water rafting. When she call...

Tracy · Tracy

My ABF has been sober for 3months and is doing well atending meetings has a sponsor so on. He is working now and paying me some money towards the bills. However I am finding I am becoming resentful. I earn more money than him and we have a nice standard of living. His money he contributes isnt even enog...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

Well after adding the EXABF's new "freind" to MY page, I got to feeling guily and decided to fess up to her. (of course Trish ya had to be on my shoulder didn't ya???) I basically told her that my ex was on her page also, and if that was an issue for her that I understood if she wanted to delete me-...

Maine Girl · Maine Girl

As challenging as it was to try to re-integrate with my husband after exiting rehab last week was - it was a walk in the park compared to dealing with the fact that he had an affair with a suicidal alcoholic while there. I found out Monday night and confronted him - I informed her husband and she confirmed...

kristielaine · kristielaine

Hello everyone, my name is Kristi. This is my first time posting on the board. I am just three days out of a relationship with an abusive man who suffers with alcoholism, and right now I'm having a hard time because despite of all the abuse, I miss him. I've been told that's normal, but I don't want to go bac...

Overcome · Overcome

Here it is the last day of July! As I read in ODAAT in Al-Anon for July 31, it suggests that we look back over the month to see what progress we have made in our program and what changes have taken place in our life. I wonder if this is like doing a 10th step or an al-anon group doing an inventory conscience? We...

debilyn · debilyn

Has anyone visited a loved one in prison? Would appreciate your thoughts and esh. For one, I do not do well out of control. Being inside is hard for me. I will not go in a skyscraper. Being locked in, bothers me. I read they search you. So all I am bringing in is me, and my keys. I guess I have to take my piercing...

maresie · maresie

Part of detaching for me is the joy of having manageable achievable goals rather than struggling and feeling I am not achieving much. I could of course be really down as I still live around very dsyfunctional people (detaching really helps there) there is little work to be hard where I am and I am worki...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Just for today~Just for me:) (Preview) Woke up this am and went straight to my am daily readers of which there are 3-lol! Not sure which one but one talked about Just for Today and how this 24 hour period was all I have to work with and all the wonderful ways I could enjoy it. I decided right then and there that that is just what I would do. No crazy...	shellyj123	9	634	Aug 6, 2009 by sterling7
	You guys give me strength (Preview) I just wanted to say thanks to everyone here that comes on and takes time to respond to posts. For me, it has helped tremendously. I can't always get to F2F meetings, even though I prefer that, b/c I have little ones at home, and scheduling is difficult. This board is so helpful for those moments of exp...	Inpain	4	508	Aug 6, 2009 by sterling7
	Really mad! (Preview) (((Family))), So sad once again the news this morning reported that the woman who killed 8 people in a car crash was drunk & high. What a waste. What will it take for people to wake up and realize that this is a disease? That people need help and that we owe it to future generations to educate, regul...	Karilynn	11	782	Aug 6, 2009 by maresie
	You CAN NOT rely on the alcoholic (Preview) This statement sucks. I know it. I hate it but it's true. There was a day we had this discussion in a F2F meeting. If you're new to al-anon (as I am) our members suggested backup plans. So, one member had the expectation her husband would remain sober as they worked on cleaning out a house. He didn't...	Inpain	6	1013	Aug 6, 2009 by sterling7
	Husband has gone to ER (Preview) I just got a call from my husband that he was coming back from the ER (we are seperated going through a divorce). He said that he went to open a beer and couldn't swallow it and new he was in trouble. He has no insurance, so after going to several hospitals he found one that would take him and he said they didn'...	Overcome	6	611	Aug 6, 2009 by sterling7
	New here (Preview) Hello All, I am new here and not really sure where to even start...I am married to an A but I am sure I dont have to tell anyone here how our life together has went for the past 4 years because if there is an A in your life you know all about the lies, the stealing,the covering up, the disappointment, the tr...	ticswife	5	510	Aug 6, 2009 by Jen
	So many emotions (Preview) Today is a really hard day. I'm very depressed and scared. I woke up crying because I feel so used and violated. I can hardly cope here at work. I just can't understand how someone can be such a horrible human being to treat anyone the way I was treated and have no remorse. I'm also depressed because I allow...	kristielaine	7	542	Aug 6, 2009 by maresie
	Good news & need help (Preview) Good news! I got a job. I will be moving to Goodyear, AZ at the end of this month. I will be working with the forclosure sector and rehabilitating the neighborhoods that have melted in the forclosure fiasco. I need help. For the life of me, I can't find any contact information re meetings in the area. God k...	Tiger2006	6	562	Aug 6, 2009 by blender_girl
	Saying goodbye to a dry drunk and my husband of 10 years. (Preview) Last month, after 5 long months of fighting and begging him to tell me who he was having an affair with, I threw my husband of 10 years out of the house. I quickly confirmed my worst fears that he had been cheating on me since February with a girl who shares his fairly recently discovered spiritual beliefs...	Princess8899	7	3833	Aug 6, 2009 by maresie
	Heartbroken (Preview) Boyfriend and I broke up, it's over for good he says... no explanation. One day he loved me with all his heart and two days later he didn't love me anymore - or so he says. So I'm trying to right myself again, realize that I leaned too hard on a rotten post and fell down again. I'm still brushing myself off...	carolinagirl	8	977	Aug 6, 2009 by maresie
	SELF CARE (Preview) Last night when my sober ABF went to his meeting I was on the computer and looked up co-dependency on you tube. It was like a cloud of denial was lifted. I found myself crying for all the pain I HAVE PUT MYSELF THROUGH. THE words self sacrificing jummped out at me. That is what I have done all my life put e...	Tracy	6	1014	Aug 6, 2009 by maresie
	Sponsorship (Preview) Sponsorship was a topic for tonight's meeting and since no one shared on it, I thought I would post a topic on it. I have been doing a lot of reading in the ODAAT in Al-Anon and Courage to Change, mediation books on this topic. It is a very important one and one that shouldn't be taken lightly if you are asked...	Overcome	2	849	Aug 6, 2009 by maresie
	This is tearing me apart (Preview) I can't think straight anymore. My head hurts! What are my choices? Me and my wife (an A in denial), are about to break up. She hasn't really spoken to me in 10 days now. Since she found out that I told our doctor that she's still drinking, even at almost 6 months pregnant. This is my problem: We have two kids...	ajay147	8	883	Aug 6, 2009 by maresie
	Oh so sad ... (Preview) I have posted before but under a different name, which I can't remember. Today I am distraught, as I was yesterday, last week, last year, two years ago. I have been 'hanging on' to a dry drunk who left my family, (we have a 5 year old son together) and moved countries. For the last 2 years I have wanted to b...	sad4life	4	543	Aug 6, 2009 by Rita G
	new here (Preview) OK, this is new to me. I really don't know if my husband is an alcoholic. I know he drinks everyday and is so obnoxious i can't stand him when he is drinking. His drinking doesn't affect his work, he doesn't drink in the morning or anything like that. It is the same routine everyday. After work he stops for a...	imasharm	3	752	Aug 6, 2009 by Inpain
	Freakin annoying........! (Preview) Just as I thought I feel better, I'm back to being sad. I'm getting sick of myself at this point	kristielaine	5	758	Aug 5, 2009 by kristielaine
	Newcome- logistical ?s about meetings (Preview) Hi there- Im new to all of this so am getting my feet wet- glad to have found this board. My husband wants to save our family and get his drinking under control but it is a bumpy road and he has been in therapy about 6 weeks. We have a LOT of underlying stress (child with cancer) that has caused him to progre...	Joanie	5	699	Aug 5, 2009 by Jerry F
	opps (Preview) Hello family, I made a boo-boo. In my post yesterday I said that it was page 174 in C2C, actually it is 74. That's what I get for quoting a page from a book when the book was home and I was not :) Yours in recovery, Mandy	Mandy123	1	372	Aug 5, 2009 by rtexas
	Codependant (Preview) Dear (((All))) My name is Carol and I'm codependant I was reading an earlier post by Tracy and was prompted to post the following 'check list' for codependancy. When I first read this list it was with great amazement. I could put a tick next to every statement I thought THATS ME! All of it applied to...	Mariner	2	784	Aug 5, 2009 by shellyj123
	An Epiphany (Preview) Thanks everyone. Slowly I'm starting see the light. I had a chat with a board member on the AA board, and started talking about how on our birthdays, this month he wanted to get a hotel room. well he wanted to invite this guy that I don't like, who is an alcoholic, and his friends girlfriend, and I remember...	kristielaine	1	672	Aug 5, 2009 by buick23
	How things transpired is what keeps me......... (Preview) Can you help me think my way through this please, because this is what keeps me lingering on this entire issue with my EAB because of the way he left it. This is what transpired the week leading to our breakup. That Tuesday before our breakup, he and his mother had some sort of big argument where she confir...	kristielaine	7	828	Aug 5, 2009 by buick23
	Letting go.. (Preview) In my honest opinion, it's far easier said than done. For 8 months I've struggled with that. I might have a difference of opinion here to on the interpretation of "letting go" - but for me, it means letting go of HIS actions. The consequences to his actions are MY responsibility. For exam...	Inpain	6	826	Aug 5, 2009 by Lotus
	....sugar and spice and everything nice. (Preview) Hi ((((Family)))) I just had a moment I have to tell about. I spent most of the day today in San Antonio playing. I had a great time and was pulling back into my hometown about 9 o'clock. I am tired, but was trying to decide if I wanted to pull into the video store near my house to rent a movie to "watch&...	david62	12	685	Aug 5, 2009 by Peggy7
	A good page in C2C, my humor, and potential disaster was diverted (Preview) Hi all,I saw once again how working your program can really scare your A and just had to share. My addict husband went over to the neighbors Sunday night and came back and said he was going to walk up the little convenience store and buy the neighbor a beer for his birthday. I said ok and went about my busine...	Mandy123	5	737	Aug 5, 2009 by canadianguy
	A fantastic read (Preview) http://www.nytimes.com/2009/08/02/fashion/02love.html	Aloha	8	910	Aug 5, 2009 by Inpain
	Oops - skipped a page (Preview) Long after reading ODAT and C2C today, I realized that I had read the wrong date. Apparently, the error occurred yesterday when I skipped August 3 and went right to August 4. This may seem like a minor problem to most, but for me, it has me confused. Should I read August 3's reading tomorrow and then be...	N8SMOM	3	481	Aug 5, 2009 by teddybearpoet
	How do you deal with lie after lie after lie (Preview) My husband has been inactive for only 18 days for the first time in 35 years. I have only known him 10 years and during this time he has never gone any longer than 3 days without drinking. I realize now that the withdrawl symptoms were too much for him to bare so he went right back to it. He finally admitted h...	malady	18	2857	Aug 4, 2009 by Princess8899
	I don't want to just wait till my wife hits bottom (Preview) Is there NOTHING I can do? We've been separated for almost 11 months now but still communicate daily and see each other once or twice a week. I am now 5 and a half months sober. She knows she has a problem but is prejudiced against A.A. because she thinks she already knows everything about it (her dad is a...	FlyingSquirrel	11	1073	Aug 4, 2009 by FlyingSquirrel
	what usually happens when A loves you, just can't show you (Preview) When an A stops drinking, are they able to express their love for you better, or does that get worse? He thinks he is, even though I've expressed to him what I need from him, things dont change. You all know the dilemma on our sleeping situation, I've made several posts lately, and he emailed me and said it...	beacheemom	10	854	Aug 4, 2009 by glad lee
	If nothing ever changes, nothing ever changes... (Preview) I remember the first time I read that I thought WOW! How can so few words hold soooo much insight. I remember coming here and being told if I didn't like the way I was feeling to try doing the opposite of what I had been doing and again thought WOW....pretty insightful. Today I am at a wall.......and I eithe...	shellyj123	5	924	Aug 4, 2009 by Inpain
	I did it again.... (Preview) Same old scenario with me and my sister. She gets drunk and I get worried and want to take care of her. She has two addictions alcohol and gambling. I don't even know how she's going to pay her rent. Oh and yes I had to drive over there(45 minutes) to see if she was alright and take her to lunch so that she...	katiecat	6	793	Aug 4, 2009 by Inpain
	update on the unvisit to prison (Preview) I got up at five thirty, drove all the way there with no pain pills. Was all in a dress, did everything I could to my girl body to look ok. Everyone has to fill out an app. to visit someone in prison. Mine should have been done. Guess what, they screwed up. Typical eh? Administration is a joke. So I waited as th...	debilyn	5	578	Aug 4, 2009 by debilyn
	Dumb me :( (Preview) I text him and said "I hope to God that you are getting help - spare me with a violent response - goodbye". Now I feel bad and set myself up for the fact that he won't respond. I guess I'm just angry because everyone got to say what they needed to say but me. He said his peace, my family said what they...	kristielaine	12	780	Aug 4, 2009 by Aloha
	This program works! (Preview) I have made peace--sorta--with everything I'm gonna tell you. Right now I'm still processing through the feelings. But I'm alive, sober, living in the solution, and it's all b/c of y'all. After I lost the job in KS, there was 1 more interview I had: Baylor University, Waco, TX. After a 10 minute interv...	Tiger2006	6	707	Aug 4, 2009 by maresie
	Separating from my A (Preview) After 15 years together, my A and I have separated. His drinking didn't become a problem until the last 4 years, during which time he's logged a total of 120 days inpatient treatment (28 days program, then later, a 90-day transitional living program). He also went to 3 different outpatient treatme...	HG	4	828	Aug 4, 2009 by maresie
	Letter to the Editor... (Preview) I'm grieving. One of our local 15 year old female died of apparent alcohol poisoning. I wanna scream and throw a tantrum!!!! I'll end up outside doing a chant to HP. HP knows. HP hears me. I don't need further proof. This is a grievable offense and so that is what happens with me. I've worked with t...	Jerry F	14	612	Aug 4, 2009 by barisax
	Newness... (Preview) Welperz... Yesterday was the start of my Son's Practice for Soccer, and My SIL & I desided to make a go of it, and while they practiced we would "Walk" for a Healthier US... She too is in Al-anon Program... Well honestly I looked forward to it all day... We walked to her Aunts to find out wh...	Jozie	1	626	Aug 4, 2009 by Tracy
	Looking back without staring (Preview) Well it's 11:40 p.m. I guess it's still officially August 3, so I can share on what the C2C reading on Aug. 3th meant to me. I must start with the beginning sentence, "There was a time in my life when I furiously insisted that alcoholism did not exist in my family." I remember being at a Thanksgi...	Overcome	2	820	Aug 4, 2009 by maresie
	I'm so sad and mad (Preview) A-bf has been in hospital x 4 weeks now... 2-weeks in ICU and 2-weeks on a floor. He had had so much alcohol and pain-killers in his body that his liver and kidneys shut down. He then went into heart failure; had pneumonia and 2 other infections. Has needed transfusions and dialysis. He is still very w...	ESH	5	978	Aug 3, 2009 by ESH
	Control can be a funny thing... (Preview) No really. I've been recognizing when and how my life has been controlled and how I control. My AH-sober-dry drunk (not b/c he wants to but because he wants to stay with his family) decided after watching a reality show on baking cakes, that he wanted to bake one. I had to secrety laugh to myself but to...	Inpain	5	708	Aug 3, 2009 by penelope
	Disappointed and exhausted (Preview) Hi everyone, I don't really ever post on the board but that doesn't mean I don't work my program, I am often in online meetings, f2f, and do my daily readings, but have a really hard time sharing sometimes. Well, right now I really need some support, as I just came back from a week long business trip to Cal...	newbelief	4	995	Aug 3, 2009 by newbelief
	Someone stop me please! (Preview) I want to call him so bad, I want him to know how much he hurt me, but I want to know he's not angry with me. What is wrong with me!! I'm shaking, crying, my stomach hurts. There is absolutely nothing positive to go back to him for but I need to hear his voice :(	kristielaine	10	841	Aug 3, 2009 by kristielaine
	Wallet and dysfunctional family update (Preview) Hi... I posted earlier that I got blasted from my folks for losing my wallet. I appreciated all your support! Those of you who said that I shouldn't be giving my parents stuff to worry about-- you're right. I will try to stick to this and watch my speech around them. The way it goes is that anything tha...	Cashey100	2	722	Aug 3, 2009 by Cashey100
	This too shall pass......Holding on and diggin in with all I have.... (Preview) To update everyone, the new friend "M" of the EXABF emailed me today to let me know pretty much that she emailed EXABF last night and told him that she was sorry but wasn't ready to start dating right now and her daughters didn't want her too, and that there was to much drama in his life that she d...	shellyj123	0	611	Aug 3, 2009 by shellyj123
	running away.... (Preview) In todays ODAAT in Al-Anon reading, August 1, it talks about how sometimes we think that by running away from our problems that all could be solved. I know I have tried this approach myself and can attest to the fact that it does not work. When I first married at 19 to an active drinker, I had no idea what alc...	Overcome	8	675	Aug 3, 2009 by sterling7
	what is going on with me? confused, please help (Preview) hi all, confused on alot of things right now. Maybe someone has some answers for me as to what is going on with me. I know this is long (most of mine are -lol) a few nights ago, AH came to bed with me for two nights and it was wonderful- yes, he was still drinking, but there was intimacy, a feeling of closeness w...	beacheemom	4	646	Aug 3, 2009 by sterling7
	20 Wishes (Preview) I hope this is ok to write on here because it helps you focus on yourself. I read this book 20 wishes by Debbie Macomber it was so good. After reading it I started my list. Its making me so happy and i"m doing the things I want and taking time for my self. I have not thought about doing things I want to d...	peacewithin	1	474	Aug 3, 2009 by debilyn
	Something to ponder.... (Preview) *Old African Proverb: "Advise and counsel him. If he does not listen, Let adversity teach him." Live strong, Karilynn & Pipers Kitty* -- Edited by Karilynn on Monday 3rd of August 2009 10:45:19 AM -- Edited by Karilynn on Monday 3rd of August 2009 10:47:39 AM	Karilynn	2	630	Aug 3, 2009 by shellyj123
	Time for Me :) (Preview) Been working out some much needed things in my mind & heart these last couple weeks. Haven't been here quite as much as usual, however I know that If I don't get "ME" back on track, I am going to stay "STUCK" and I don't want that... My boy turned 12 yesterday, and after spending...	Jozie	3	732	Aug 3, 2009 by shellyj123
	Acceptance of the unacceptable (Preview) My sponsor keeps telling me I need to love my A for who he is and accept him as he is. When I ask my boyfriend what it meant that he bought me a $1, 200 gift (that represents alot of money to us) even though he had just said he "wasn't so sure about us", he acts offended and he said" I'm not gonn...	glad	4	609	Aug 3, 2009 by katiecat
	CHOICES (Preview) Choices Such a small word but such a life changer. My AH-sober is struggling right now with not being happy in his job.Tonite when we were watching tv he said " I hate my job".This is due to a change in his job that was not of his doing.He has gone from being ok with it to hating it to being ok with it...	drucilla06	3	654	Aug 3, 2009 by katiecat
	Why am I feeling this way? (Preview) I know this is my first weekend without him. But last night I had a hard time, it was like I was going through withdrawals or something, and I wasn't the one who drank. I couldn't sleep, I was hurting all over and shaking. I haven't heard from him and I'm not calling or contacting him, even though the pit of...	kristielaine	6	684	Aug 3, 2009 by kristielaine
	At what age??? (Preview) (((Family))), At what age is it appropriate to tell a child about a parent's addiction? Here's what's going on. Yesterday my older niece "Laura" called me to tell me her Dad stole her car while she was with her Mom & younger sister "Lisa" white water rafting. When she call...	Karilynn	8	569	Aug 3, 2009 by abbyal
	responsibility (Preview) My ABF has been sober for 3months and is doing well atending meetings has a sponsor so on. He is working now and paying me some money towards the bills. However I am finding I am becoming resentful. I earn more money than him and we have a nice standard of living. His money he contributes isnt even enog...	Tracy	4	497	Aug 3, 2009 by sterling7
	Insanity at it's finest.........all over again. (Preview) Well after adding the EXABF's new "freind" to MY page, I got to feeling guily and decided to fess up to her. (of course Trish ya had to be on my shoulder didn't ya???) I basically told her that my ex was on her page also, and if that was an issue for her that I understood if she wanted to delete me-...	shellyj123	3	834	Aug 2, 2009 by sterling7
	Had affair when he was in rehab.....insanity is creeping in. (Preview) As challenging as it was to try to re-integrate with my husband after exiting rehab last week was - it was a walk in the park compared to dealing with the fact that he had an affair with a suicidal alcoholic while there. I found out Monday night and confronted him - I informed her husband and she confirmed...	Maine Girl	9	2831	Aug 2, 2009 by Maine Girl
	Just days out of abusive relationship (Preview) Hello everyone, my name is Kristi. This is my first time posting on the board. I am just three days out of a relationship with an abusive man who suffers with alcoholism, and right now I'm having a hard time because despite of all the abuse, I miss him. I've been told that's normal, but I don't want to go bac...	kristielaine	11	842	Aug 2, 2009 by maresie
	Doing the 10th step? (Preview) Here it is the last day of July! As I read in ODAAT in Al-Anon for July 31, it suggests that we look back over the month to see what progress we have made in our program and what changes have taken place in our life. I wonder if this is like doing a 10th step or an al-anon group doing an inventory conscience? We...	Overcome	3	511	Aug 2, 2009 by maresie
	esh visiting AH in prison, please, afraid (Preview) Has anyone visited a loved one in prison? Would appreciate your thoughts and esh. For one, I do not do well out of control. Being inside is hard for me. I will not go in a skyscraper. Being locked in, bothers me. I read they search you. So all I am bringing in is me, and my keys. I guess I have to take my piercing...	debilyn	8	589	Aug 2, 2009 by maresie
	the benefit of having goals. (Preview) Part of detaching for me is the joy of having manageable achievable goals rather than struggling and feeling I am not achieving much. I could of course be really down as I still live around very dsyfunctional people (detaching really helps there) there is little work to be hard where I am and I am worki...	maresie	3	765	Aug 2, 2009 by maresie
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.