Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

lizzakiss · lizzakiss

Hi. This may be a bit off my normal topic but I wasn't sure where to turn. My Abf-sober has a 14 year old son and he is with us every other weekend. He has always been a good kid, my bf never had a father growing up and as a result has always been very involved and hands on (as the ex would let him) with his son. ...

lindseymommyof2 · lindseymommyof2

But I don't know how to get out of it. It feels like I kept my anger in for 5 years (our whole relationship) and now it all boils out...at my Afiance. I feel so mad at myself that I used to yell so much at my kids, and realizing it now that it was because of the craziness going on with my Afiance. I am seeing a ther...

Rora · Rora

Another member here mentioned this quote and I guess it touches me so directly these days. In discussions (lectures) with my exaH he tends to frequently play the card of "I know ... the problem is you don't love me!" And I start to panic. Because I DO love him. There is so much about him and t...

Tracy · Tracy

Hi all, went to a meeting last night topic taking care of ourselves. My ABF got sober last april since November he has started slipping twice when nephew died.then again jan and twice since last week, last night latest occassion. I did not know this when I was in the meeting and have been handling the...

Diva · Diva

It has been so sad to watch him disintegrate. I pity the man; he is so deep into his alcoholism that nothing else matters. I have told him to leave so many times, but always took him back. But now he has gone too far. I cannot live with the mental abuse that he heaps upon me when he drinks; unbelievably aw...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

Hello Friends, It's been awhile since I have posted....I am having one of those days that you know is from living with addiction for so many years. Things were going well, my daughter has no patience for anything....it's almost like the addict that wants it now and their own way and nothing else matter...

shimo · shimo

Hi friends, I am unable to chair the Monday a.m. Al-Anon Meeting. My senior friend requires transportation to her eye doctor and her appointment is sheduled for our meeting time. Hoping another OP can step up for me and if not, hopefully another member will step up. Have a great day! Love in recove...

MissyPoo · MissyPoo

Hi everyone... I am looking for some ESH on how you have handled social functions with your AH. My AH's sister is getting married at the end of May, and of course where there is a wedding, there is alcohol. I know I cannot control whether or not my A drinks at the wedding, or how much, he either will or he wo...

Hurt Nurse · Hurt Nurse

I am so furious. In my Sunday morning Al Anon group and ex coworker was at the last meeting. On Monday morning a guy I work with said "I talked with Chris, he said he saw you at an Al Anon meeting Sunday morning". I thought "nothing left the room". I didn't want people at work to know m...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hi all, As many of you know I just went through a divorce and it wsa final on 03/02. But something I haven't shared here is that during my 90 day waiting period for the divorce to be final, I met someone. I met him online on Facebook of all places lol. We were playing a game in the same room and started chatting...

Acatnip · Acatnip

As I posted here before, I left AH but am having tremendous feelings of guilt and remorse. My head tells me I have done the right thing but I am so heartbroken and guilt filled. I did spend some time with AH since his release from rehab and found him in sorry shape. Physically, he is pale and constant shaki...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hi all, Do any of you who have been around for a while remember the "Mandy and Paul" show? (Paul and I used to chair meetings twice a week in the chat room) We are going to have the live version next week :). (And yes I have his permission to post this). I can't wait....next week I am flying out to th...

Tattyhead · Tattyhead

Just venting because I am feeling absolutely rubbish. I have been to my father's funeral (Tuesday) and it was a lovely service but I did feel somewhat isolated without AH there to support me. I didn't want him there, given the state he is in but his staying away didn't help me feel any better. He was once s...

sdisnie · sdisnie

Starting next week my boys have baseball games every single day. I will now have to start seeing the ex, when I have been able to completely keep him away and out of my life. Having to deal with his presense at these games is terrifing to me. I've been healing because the best thing for me is to not have to...

angelbreeze127 · angelbreeze127

Just wanted to say thanks for the replies... I guess I was a little short with my info... I am the major bread winner btw the 2 of us... I make twice a smuch as he does per week... my name is on everything and his is on nothing other than his account. so, what did I learn from you wonderful friends... I feel for...

ayjay · ayjay

I had a check today with my midwife and was told i was aneamic and could have diabetes due to the pregnancy. I am not suprised I feel ill, have no energy and have not been able to look after myself properly. 2 years of my partner coming and going has brought me to my knees, especially with it being the same al...

PattyW · PattyW

Hi Everyone, My name is Patty and I have a very good friend who I am very concerned about. Over the past couple years we have become very close. He has confided in me that he is a functional alcoholic... he knows there is a problem, but he is unwilling or unable to seek help. He is a wonderful and amazing...

Diva · Diva

Today I found out I can start the mower, and I got most of the lawns mowed. Tomorrow I try the weedeater! LOL I am taking care of the animals singlehandedly; even hired a reputable painter to finish the outside of the house. (the A just dropped everything and walked out.) Calling that "walking o...

Ness · Ness

Travelling back from the funeral of my sis-in-law last week, a long 600 mile trip, my Ason was foremost in my thoughts. Love and loss, funerals trigger many things. I was thinking I feel a bit stronger now in Alanon, maybe I will tweak the boundary a bit and let him come home for a weekend.Well around a 100...

miss lucy · miss lucy

i am so frustrated with AH right now i could cheerfully ............ i dont know what i could cheerfully do? the final decision was taken by me that enough was enough as you know earlier this week. since then AH has been a right royal pain in the you know what!!! he has deliberately come past where i l...

lyndebi · lyndebi

Been sick, my med makes me sleep. Which is ok as I have not had my shoulder fixed yet, pain makes it hard to sleep. Anyway I had a horrible dream. I tend to dream in this same sorta way. Everyone who passed in my life, which is almost everyone, hates me. I mean is so disgusted and ashamed of me. My family was ver...

Aloha · Aloha

It's been a while since I've posted here. My sponsor, god bless her, isn't available for a phone call, though I did call another member and chat for a while... feel a little better but I know my mind and I know my head's going to chew on this for a good deal of time. And it ticks me off because it's the evening a...

DreamsOver · DreamsOver

I feel so shut off from the world around me. I get up, I go to work, I take care of my house and everyone in it. I had to hear today at work the endless talk of successful children, loving grandchildren, lives that seem to glide through life from one accomplishment to the next. I am just relieved if I make it t...

Jerry F · Jerry F

is relief and relaxation, sometimes its relief and happiness and sometimes it is sadness and grief. Got some extra undirected prayers? Got some whispers to your Higher Power ready to go. I'd like to use a couple of them if I may along with my own...Our family just lost a young 29 year old female cousi...

angelbreeze127 · angelbreeze127

My ah and I keep separate checking accounts... for obvious reasons... Unbeknownst to him, I keep tabs on his acc't. Why? Becasue he usually keeps about $150 a week for his crap and I get resentfull if he has got overtime and he doens't offer it up for bills...He doesn't do a good job at this. he has no i...

maybethistime · maybethistime

I've attended a bunch of meetings in the last two weeks. i've purchased one of the books. i'm struggling with letting go control - ie a higher power. i am realizing i am a control freak and one of the reasons i can't believe in "god" or a higher power is that i can't admit that i am powerless/lack...

doublesmommy · doublesmommy

I havent been here in awhile, but I wanted to share the following, cause even though we are divorced I suppose this still affects me and the kids. On February 4, 2010 my X moved back to the small island he was raised on, this after he was arrested and had his license suspended at the end of January for a DUI, a...

Destynee · Destynee

I hit him twice. One was a punch in the face. I'm so incredibly guilty and sick over it. I've been beating myself up since. He disappeared again on Thursday and didn't come back or call. Called Saturday and left me a suicide message again. This is 3 times now. When I didn't respond, he went to the ER...

sdisnie · sdisnie

Everyone has told me over and over my kids will benefit from this split with the A and myself. I have told them that i hid it so well from my kids, my A didn't drink at home...he would disappear and be gone for long periods of time. My kids would think he was working out of town. Everyone says...including...

LynW · LynW

I haven't slept in days....all I do is cry...looking for some peace and inspiration. I have an adult son, a police officer, who is an alcoholic. He was careful...never drank on a day when he was working, but when he was off duty, he drank much more than I realized. A few days into 2010, he had a seizure on...

Jozie · Jozie

Welp... yesterday I Finally got to spend some Much needed time with my Sponser, we hung out & chatted for hours on end ;) it is amazing how after speaking I can feel so much better... She has been helping me work on some issues that I am attemping to come to terms with... I never realized how much I make m...

beacheemom · beacheemom

I am desperately hoping someone can guide me in the right direction and offer some kind of advice because right now I am feeling so lost and alone. Father in law is an alcoholic. My husband or sister in law doesn't know what to do now. My husband and I have opened our home up to him twice in the past even when w...

sdisnie · sdisnie

It kind of makes me feel better to not deal with him...to speak to him, to not look at him, to not be anywhere near him. When I see a text or an email come through I absolutely cringe. I can't deal with anything that he's doing or how he's living his life right now, so completely shutting myself off from it...

weggie · weggie

I came home from work yesterday to a empty house, I knew my A was out drinking again. I went about my business, took shower, read a lilttle, pray, watched dancing with the stars....My A calls me 4 times on the phone and I did not pick up. I am thinking he is drunk and the bar is calling me to pick him up or he is...

chezza · chezza

Hi people. I thought I would share my new awareness with you guys. I read this reading the other night in Hope For Today page 17 as I become overwhelmed with my struggle to detach from family with it being easter weekend. To give a little bit of insight I was feeling lonely due to not spending time with my n...

Maria123 · Maria123

Happy Birthday (((Kerry))), May your day be just as beautiful as you Hope you and your little ones have a wonderful day together to celebrate your :birthday: Enjoy love in recovery, Maria

cassidy2010 · cassidy2010

Finally I have decided to stop feeling sorry for myself .I gathered up my courage and prayed I could hold it together.I went to speak to lawyer about my situation and he advised me to get out that very day .He said he was worried for my safety and my children.He asked me to contact my parents for...

lizzakiss · lizzakiss

Hello! I always get such good advice, wisdom and a feeling of peace on these boards that I wanted to share something that has been bothering me involving my Abf-sober's ex-gf. Recently I have been posting alot about both my and my bf working our programs, treating each other gently, communicating...

Jennifer · Jennifer

I may be a bit giddy at 1AM after 12 hours of homework but hearing the TV playing a late night movie, Dukes of Hazard. When all of a sudden clear as a bell I heard the line of the narrator say, "When you're flying by the seat of your pants nothing sounds more official than a Plan B" and had flashback...

Ragdolls · Ragdolls

My A fiance just walked out on me about an hour or so ago. I don't know where he is, if he's coming back, or what to do at this point. I did try and call him about a million times to find out if he's coming back. I don't like to be left in the air like this let alone sad and hurt. We had a disagreement and he just l...

mon123 · mon123

Hi , I thought I might introduce myself again. I'm English so I have found it hard to join in with the chat room meetings. The times are terrible for me. I used to use the chat room a lot when my husband was drinking. Ranting in the middle of the night to people who understood really helped me sleep and move in...

ayjay · ayjay

I am on a rollercoaster of emotions, after a rollercoaster relationship with my ex who is in NA and AA and been clean for 7 years almost. I have mentioned im pregnant and due in around 9 weeks to give birth. So hormones and the prospect of being alone when im quite vulnerable adds to my stress. I have thi...

RunnerChick · RunnerChick

Finally have Internet set up in my new apartment. Most of you know I moved out of the house with my ex-abf - bf? I don't even know what is going on between us now... While I have MOVED out - I have not MOVED on. I am terrified to ask for space. Terrified of losing him forever - OR of him meeting someone else. Ther...

victoria · victoria

I don't know why I think I have to find a place for my A ex-husband to go to when I keep my promise that he must leave when he starts drinking again. (we're together in my house). The house use to be ours but due to his legal issues, the house was put in my name. He started drinking yesterday and I want him out. He...

Karilynn · Karilynn

((((((Family))))), A very Happy Easter to all of you. The has risen and it is truely a glorious Sunday. Enjoy the day and all that it has to offer. Enjoy the promise of a new day and new beginnings. Hope springs eternal. I hope the Easter Bunny and Easter Beagle (remember Charilie Brown?) is extra g...

seekingserenity · seekingserenity

I guess I should have said that its an inner child book not an acoa book...sorry for the confusion.

kerry5 · kerry5

Can not chair tonights meeting would appreciate another op to chair Thanks kERry

Diva · Diva

So he left...What else is new? He has left and I have taken him back so many times, my door is coming off the hinges. This time I have made it clear to him that I do not want him back. Oh, I see some lonely days and nights ahead, but all in all, I have my life back and I feel good about my future. We had a trip to Ha...

pineapple · pineapple

The good news is AH has been not drinking for about 6 weeks now. The bad news is he would still be driving me crazy if I let it get to me. I guess he is in that stage that I've heard called ¨stark raving sober¨. He has tons of energy, a million different projects started, is critical of things I've done or decis...

Gailey · Gailey

I will not ask my A son anything that will give him the opportunity to lie....especially if I already know the answer.

Katy · Katy

Two equal quantities of generosity and thought for others, add a few dozen pleasant smiles, followed by the same number of kind words. Sprinkle freely with fun and merriment, flavour with wit and humour and mix thoroughly with the spirit of love. Warm with bright looks and serve often. Katyx

Jennifer · Jennifer

They're sitting on mine right now. Another letter came in the mail today. And I quote, "I know you asked for no contact but I just can't do it." "I think I know I screwed up, but come on ..." "you are my only friend" I am the least violent person in the world but I swear right...

Mobirdie · Mobirdie

I have found myself dealing with a lot of other people's junk lately and one day something (probably my HP) said "get busy". So long story short I am starting a new Al-Anon group today at noon. My area has not had a daytime meeting for as far back as I can remember. I've gotten a lot of positive...

ayjay · ayjay

HI I am new to al-anon, but have been considering joining for around 12 years, when I first read the book 'women who love too much'. I went to my first meeting 3 weeks ago and plan to attend regular after some time reflecting. I wasn't sure if it could help me, I am not here because im pregnant to a guy in NA, a...

Courage · Courage

Agenda Open with Serenity Prayer Review of OP Meeting Chair Schedule Old Business none at present New Business election of Business Meeting Chair election of Business Meeting Secretary Closing with Al-Anon Declaration -- Edited by Courage on Saturday 3rd of April 2010 09:23:37 PM

intothewoods · intothewoods

So I went away from our house for a week for a funeral and a business trip. When I got back, I swear, the house smells like beer breath. That alcoholic smell. You know the one. It makes me sick. So what am I doing? NOT going to sit here smelling it and freaking out silently, hating my AH more with every passing...

Love Always Hopes · Love Always Hopes

Okay so this is getting a little on the personal side and I apologize in advance if I offend anyone... Is it unreasonable of me to refuse sex to my A when he is drunk? He is acting like I'm the most unreasonable callous person on the planet and I just tried to nicely explain that I'm not interested in intima...

seekingserenity · seekingserenity

A while ago someone told me the name of an ACOA book that I could read online. I thought I put it in my favorites but it's gone. Anyway, I would appreciate any help. Thanks

miss lucy · miss lucy

hello again. sorry its been a while. i have been heavily into my studying. am pleased to report that i have passed two of my six tests and am shortly to take number three. my business plan is slowly coming together and i have now got a car so i am completely independant. life should be so good now but i a...

KRS · KRS

My daughter A was sober for 60 days going to meetings everyday had a caring sponsor and I thought we were well on our way to sobriety.....until her court hearing. Since her BA level was .404 she was charged with a super extreme dui with a minimum jail sentence of 6 months. We got home and she immediately...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Please, I need your HELP!! (Preview) Hi. This may be a bit off my normal topic but I wasn't sure where to turn. My Abf-sober has a 14 year old son and he is with us every other weekend. He has always been a good kid, my bf never had a father growing up and as a result has always been very involved and hands on (as the ex would let him) with his son. ...	lizzakiss	4	832	Apr 11, 2010 by xeno59
	I want to be out of the Anger stage... (Preview) But I don't know how to get out of it. It feels like I kept my anger in for 5 years (our whole relationship) and now it all boils out...at my Afiance. I feel so mad at myself that I used to yell so much at my kids, and realizing it now that it was because of the craziness going on with my Afiance. I am seeing a ther...	lindseymommyof2	10	1324	Apr 11, 2010 by xeno59
	"sometimes love is not enough"... (Preview) Another member here mentioned this quote and I guess it touches me so directly these days. In discussions (lectures) with my exaH he tends to frequently play the card of "I know ... the problem is you don't love me!" And I start to panic. Because I DO love him. There is so much about him and t...	Rora	6	1170	Apr 11, 2010 by xeno59
	taking care of myself, HOW? (Preview) Hi all, went to a meeting last night topic taking care of ourselves. My ABF got sober last april since November he has started slipping twice when nephew died.then again jan and twice since last week, last night latest occassion. I did not know this when I was in the meeting and have been handling the...	Tracy	4	998	Apr 11, 2010 by xeno59
	He's out of my house, but not out of my heart. (Preview) It has been so sad to watch him disintegrate. I pity the man; he is so deep into his alcoholism that nothing else matters. I have told him to leave so many times, but always took him back. But now he has gone too far. I cannot live with the mental abuse that he heaps upon me when he drinks; unbelievably aw...	Diva	15	917	Apr 11, 2010 by One4Life
	The lasting affects of living with Addiction (Preview) Hello Friends, It's been awhile since I have posted....I am having one of those days that you know is from living with addiction for so many years. Things were going well, my daughter has no patience for anything....it's almost like the addict that wants it now and their own way and nothing else matter...	Andrea12	3	609	Apr 11, 2010 by Karilynn
	MONDAY A.M. Al-ANON MEETING (Preview) Hi friends, I am unable to chair the Monday a.m. Al-Anon Meeting. My senior friend requires transportation to her eye doctor and her appointment is sheduled for our meeting time. Hoping another OP can step up for me and if not, hopefully another member will step up. Have a great day! Love in recove...	shimo	0	453	Apr 11, 2010 by shimo
	ESH needed on how to handle social functions with an A (Preview) Hi everyone... I am looking for some ESH on how you have handled social functions with your AH. My AH's sister is getting married at the end of May, and of course where there is a wedding, there is alcohol. I know I cannot control whether or not my A drinks at the wedding, or how much, he either will or he wo...	MissyPoo	5	999	Apr 11, 2010 by MissyPoo
	someone at my al anon group told a coworker that I was gong to al anon! I thought it was ANON!!! (Preview) I am so furious. In my Sunday morning Al Anon group and ex coworker was at the last meeting. On Monday morning a guy I work with said "I talked with Chris, he said he saw you at an Al Anon meeting Sunday morning". I thought "nothing left the room". I didn't want people at work to know m...	Hurt Nurse	8	1797	Apr 11, 2010 by Mattie
	Hurting (Preview) Hi all, As many of you know I just went through a divorce and it wsa final on 03/02. But something I haven't shared here is that during my 90 day waiting period for the divorce to be final, I met someone. I met him online on Facebook of all places lol. We were playing a game in the same room and started chatting...	Mandy123	13	798	Apr 10, 2010 by Maria123
	Guilt and Grieving (Preview) As I posted here before, I left AH but am having tremendous feelings of guilt and remorse. My head tells me I have done the right thing but I am so heartbroken and guilt filled. I did spend some time with AH since his release from rehab and found him in sorry shape. Physically, he is pale and constant shaki...	Acatnip	4	1195	Apr 10, 2010 by Jennifer
	Do you remember? (Preview) Hi all, Do any of you who have been around for a while remember the "Mandy and Paul" show? (Paul and I used to chair meetings twice a week in the chat room) We are going to have the live version next week :). (And yes I have his permission to post this). I can't wait....next week I am flying out to th...	Mandy123	4	1038	Apr 10, 2010 by grammie
	How much more? (Preview) Just venting because I am feeling absolutely rubbish. I have been to my father's funeral (Tuesday) and it was a lovely service but I did feel somewhat isolated without AH there to support me. I didn't want him there, given the state he is in but his staying away didn't help me feel any better. He was once s...	Tattyhead	8	1237	Apr 10, 2010 by hotrod
	How can I deal with having to see X-A at kids baseball games every day for the next few months?? (Preview) Starting next week my boys have baseball games every single day. I will now have to start seeing the ex, when I have been able to completely keep him away and out of my life. Having to deal with his presense at these games is terrifing to me. I've been healing because the best thing for me is to not have to...	sdisnie	3	770	Apr 10, 2010 by Loupiness
	ah's checking account them... part 2 (Preview) Just wanted to say thanks for the replies... I guess I was a little short with my info... I am the major bread winner btw the 2 of us... I make twice a smuch as he does per week... my name is on everything and his is on nothing other than his account. so, what did I learn from you wonderful friends... I feel for...	angelbreeze127	4	1164	Apr 9, 2010 by abbyal
	Physically ill with all the stress (Preview) I had a check today with my midwife and was told i was aneamic and could have diabetes due to the pregnancy. I am not suprised I feel ill, have no energy and have not been able to look after myself properly. 2 years of my partner coming and going has brought me to my knees, especially with it being the same al...	ayjay	9	1271	Apr 9, 2010 by ayjay
	Should I contact his family... (Preview) Hi Everyone, My name is Patty and I have a very good friend who I am very concerned about. Over the past couple years we have become very close. He has confided in me that he is a functional alcoholic... he knows there is a problem, but he is unwilling or unable to seek help. He is a wonderful and amazing...	PattyW	11	996	Apr 9, 2010 by White Rabbit
	Day five and doing well. (Preview) Today I found out I can start the mower, and I got most of the lawns mowed. Tomorrow I try the weedeater! LOL I am taking care of the animals singlehandedly; even hired a reputable painter to finish the outside of the house. (the A just dropped everything and walked out.) Calling that "walking o...	Diva	9	953	Apr 9, 2010 by tlcate
	Just when my boundaries were slipping......... (Preview) Travelling back from the funeral of my sis-in-law last week, a long 600 mile trip, my Ason was foremost in my thoughts. Love and loss, funerals trigger many things. I was thinking I feel a bit stronger now in Alanon, maybe I will tweak the boundary a bit and let him come home for a weekend.Well around a 100...	Ness	6	881	Apr 9, 2010 by Ness
	AH just wont go away and leave me in peace. (Preview) i am so frustrated with AH right now i could cheerfully ............ i dont know what i could cheerfully do? the final decision was taken by me that enough was enough as you know earlier this week. since then AH has been a right royal pain in the you know what!!! he has deliberately come past where i l...	miss lucy	6	737	Apr 9, 2010 by China
	dreams, what does it all mean (Preview) Been sick, my med makes me sleep. Which is ok as I have not had my shoulder fixed yet, pain makes it hard to sleep. Anyway I had a horrible dream. I tend to dream in this same sorta way. Everyone who passed in my life, which is almost everyone, hates me. I mean is so disgusted and ashamed of me. My family was ver...	lyndebi	2	647	Apr 9, 2010 by lyndebi
	Got roped again (Preview) It's been a while since I've posted here. My sponsor, god bless her, isn't available for a phone call, though I did call another member and chat for a while... feel a little better but I know my mind and I know my head's going to chew on this for a good deal of time. And it ticks me off because it's the evening a...	Aloha	5	747	Apr 8, 2010 by saltire
	Isolation (Preview) I feel so shut off from the world around me. I get up, I go to work, I take care of my house and everyone in it. I had to hear today at work the endless talk of successful children, loving grandchildren, lives that seem to glide through life from one accomplishment to the next. I am just relieved if I make it t...	DreamsOver	9	935	Apr 8, 2010 by tlcate
	Sometimes the consequences of powerlessness... (Preview) is relief and relaxation, sometimes its relief and happiness and sometimes it is sadness and grief. Got some extra undirected prayers? Got some whispers to your Higher Power ready to go. I'd like to use a couple of them if I may along with my own...Our family just lost a young 29 year old female cousi...	Jerry F	21	1006	Apr 8, 2010 by tlcate
	feeling guilty... should I? (Preview) My ah and I keep separate checking accounts... for obvious reasons... Unbeknownst to him, I keep tabs on his acc't. Why? Becasue he usually keeps about $150 a week for his crap and I get resentfull if he has got overtime and he doens't offer it up for bills...He doesn't do a good job at this. he has no i...	angelbreeze127	7	819	Apr 8, 2010 by Jerry F
	struggling with higher power (Preview) I've attended a bunch of meetings in the last two weeks. i've purchased one of the books. i'm struggling with letting go control - ie a higher power. i am realizing i am a control freak and one of the reasons i can't believe in "god" or a higher power is that i can't admit that i am powerless/lack...	maybethistime	14	1498	Apr 8, 2010 by Diva
	He finally hit rock bottom literally (Preview) I havent been here in awhile, but I wanted to share the following, cause even though we are divorced I suppose this still affects me and the kids. On February 4, 2010 my X moved back to the small island he was raised on, this after he was arrested and had his license suspended at the end of January for a DUI, a...	doublesmommy	13	789	Apr 8, 2010 by doublesmommy
	I hit my AH today. (Preview) I hit him twice. One was a punch in the face. I'm so incredibly guilty and sick over it. I've been beating myself up since. He disappeared again on Thursday and didn't come back or call. Called Saturday and left me a suicide message again. This is 3 times now. When I didn't respond, he went to the ER...	Destynee	12	717	Apr 8, 2010 by evaangel
	My kids were clueless to the problem (Preview) Everyone has told me over and over my kids will benefit from this split with the A and myself. I have told them that i hid it so well from my kids, my A didn't drink at home...he would disappear and be gone for long periods of time. My kids would think he was working out of town. Everyone says...including...	sdisnie	6	857	Apr 7, 2010 by mon123
	I am Lyn... I am new to all this and really hurting right now (Preview) I haven't slept in days....all I do is cry...looking for some peace and inspiration. I have an adult son, a police officer, who is an alcoholic. He was careful...never drank on a day when he was working, but when he was off duty, he drank much more than I realized. A few days into 2010, he had a seizure on...	LynW	13	1270	Apr 7, 2010 by Ness
	Still Learning... Still Growing :) (Preview) Welp... yesterday I Finally got to spend some Much needed time with my Sponser, we hung out & chatted for hours on end ;) it is amazing how after speaking I can feel so much better... She has been helping me work on some issues that I am attemping to come to terms with... I never realized how much I make m...	Jozie	1	692	Apr 7, 2010 by hotrod
	needing someone to" listen ", please (Preview) I am desperately hoping someone can guide me in the right direction and offer some kind of advice because right now I am feeling so lost and alone. Father in law is an alcoholic. My husband or sister in law doesn't know what to do now. My husband and I have opened our home up to him twice in the past even when w...	beacheemom	7	686	Apr 6, 2010 by Mattie
	Is it healthy or not healthy to just flat out not communicate with the ex-AH (Preview) It kind of makes me feel better to not deal with him...to speak to him, to not look at him, to not be anywhere near him. When I see a text or an email come through I absolutely cringe. I can't deal with anything that he's doing or how he's living his life right now, so completely shutting myself off from it...	sdisnie	2	763	Apr 6, 2010 by Melissa21
	Morning After Again...... (Preview) I came home from work yesterday to a empty house, I knew my A was out drinking again. I went about my business, took shower, read a lilttle, pray, watched dancing with the stars....My A calls me 4 times on the phone and I did not pick up. I am thinking he is drunk and the bar is calling me to pick him up or he is...	weggie	6	825	Apr 6, 2010 by Jerry F
	Letting go (new personal recovery awareness) (Preview) Hi people. I thought I would share my new awareness with you guys. I read this reading the other night in Hope For Today page 17 as I become overwhelmed with my struggle to detach from family with it being easter weekend. To give a little bit of insight I was feeling lonely due to not spending time with my n...	chezza	4	1102	Apr 6, 2010 by kitty
	Today's Birthday Gal - Kerry5 (Preview) Happy Birthday (((Kerry))), May your day be just as beautiful as you Hope you and your little ones have a wonderful day together to celebrate your :birthday: Enjoy love in recovery, Maria	Maria123	8	750	Apr 6, 2010 by Christy
	trying to break free (Preview) Finally I have decided to stop feeling sorry for myself .I gathered up my courage and prayed I could hold it together.I went to speak to lawyer about my situation and he advised me to get out that very day .He said he was worried for my safety and my children.He asked me to contact my parents for...	cassidy2010	5	778	Apr 5, 2010 by Jerry F
	Hoping for some insight...ESH...sanity? (Preview) Hello! I always get such good advice, wisdom and a feeling of peace on these boards that I wanted to share something that has been bothering me involving my Abf-sober's ex-gf. Recently I have been posting alot about both my and my bf working our programs, treating each other gently, communicating...	lizzakiss	4	802	Apr 5, 2010 by Jerry F
	Something I found funny (Preview) I may be a bit giddy at 1AM after 12 hours of homework but hearing the TV playing a late night movie, Dukes of Hazard. When all of a sudden clear as a bell I heard the line of the narrator say, "When you're flying by the seat of your pants nothing sounds more official than a Plan B" and had flashback...	Jennifer	1	550	Apr 5, 2010 by kitty
	Desperately need ESH (Preview) My A fiance just walked out on me about an hour or so ago. I don't know where he is, if he's coming back, or what to do at this point. I did try and call him about a million times to find out if he's coming back. I don't like to be left in the air like this let alone sad and hurt. We had a disagreement and he just l...	Ragdolls	12	956	Apr 5, 2010 by maresie
	Hi, returning to the forum ...again (Preview) Hi , I thought I might introduce myself again. I'm English so I have found it hard to join in with the chat room meetings. The times are terrible for me. I used to use the chat room a lot when my husband was drinking. Ranting in the middle of the night to people who understood really helped me sleep and move in...	mon123	5	729	Apr 5, 2010 by mon123
	I think im starting to be touched by the hp (Preview) I am on a rollercoaster of emotions, after a rollercoaster relationship with my ex who is in NA and AA and been clean for 7 years almost. I have mentioned im pregnant and due in around 9 weeks to give birth. So hormones and the prospect of being alone when im quite vulnerable adds to my stress. I have thi...	ayjay	4	749	Apr 5, 2010 by ayjay
	Moved out, but haven't moved on... (Preview) Finally have Internet set up in my new apartment. Most of you know I moved out of the house with my ex-abf - bf? I don't even know what is going on between us now... While I have MOVED out - I have not MOVED on. I am terrified to ask for space. Terrified of losing him forever - OR of him meeting someone else. Ther...	RunnerChick	12	1005	Apr 4, 2010 by speck31
	Is this insane?! (Preview) I don't know why I think I have to find a place for my A ex-husband to go to when I keep my promise that he must leave when he starts drinking again. (we're together in my house). The house use to be ours but due to his legal issues, the house was put in my name. He started drinking yesterday and I want him out. He...	victoria	7	1056	Apr 4, 2010 by victoria
	Happy Easter! (Preview) ((((((Family))))), A very Happy Easter to all of you. The has risen and it is truely a glorious Sunday. Enjoy the day and all that it has to offer. Enjoy the promise of a new day and new beginnings. Hope springs eternal. I hope the Easter Bunny and Easter Beagle (remember Charilie Brown?) is extra g...	Karilynn	3	543	Apr 4, 2010 by Jerry F
	clarification to looking for a book (Preview) I guess I should have said that its an inner child book not an acoa book...sorry for the confusion.	seekingserenity	1	542	Apr 4, 2010 by kerry5
	Need Op to chair tonights meeting (Preview) Can not chair tonights meeting would appreciate another op to chair Thanks kERry	kerry5	0	511	Apr 4, 2010 by kerry5
	Hawaii calls...even without him... (Preview) So he left...What else is new? He has left and I have taken him back so many times, my door is coming off the hinges. This time I have made it clear to him that I do not want him back. Oh, I see some lonely days and nights ahead, but all in all, I have my life back and I feel good about my future. We had a trip to Ha...	Diva	15	991	Apr 4, 2010 by Karilynn
	progress report (Preview) The good news is AH has been not drinking for about 6 weeks now. The bad news is he would still be driving me crazy if I let it get to me. I guess he is in that stage that I've heard called ¨stark raving sober¨. He has tons of energy, a million different projects started, is critical of things I've done or decis...	pineapple	7	1090	Apr 3, 2010 by hotrod
	Just for today.......... (Preview) I will not ask my A son anything that will give him the opportunity to lie....especially if I already know the answer.	Gailey	6	873	Apr 3, 2010 by Hoot Nanny
	recipe:- HAPPINESS PUDDING! (Preview) Two equal quantities of generosity and thought for others, add a few dozen pleasant smiles, followed by the same number of kind words. Sprinkle freely with fun and merriment, flavour with wit and humour and mix thoroughly with the spirit of love. Warm with bright looks and serve often. Katyx	Katy	5	722	Apr 3, 2010 by Hoot Nanny
	Know that image of the angel on one shoulder devil on the other (Preview) They're sitting on mine right now. Another letter came in the mail today. And I quote, "I know you asked for no contact but I just can't do it." "I think I know I screwed up, but come on ..." "you are my only friend" I am the least violent person in the world but I swear right...	Jennifer	7	1037	Apr 3, 2010 by lacewing
	Starting a new group wish me luck (Preview) I have found myself dealing with a lot of other people's junk lately and one day something (probably my HP) said "get busy". So long story short I am starting a new Al-Anon group today at noon. My area has not had a daytime meeting for as far back as I can remember. I've gotten a lot of positive...	Mobirdie	8	641	Apr 3, 2010 by blender_girl
	Women who love too much (Preview) HI I am new to al-anon, but have been considering joining for around 12 years, when I first read the book 'women who love too much'. I went to my first meeting 3 weeks ago and plan to attend regular after some time reflecting. I wasn't sure if it could help me, I am not here because im pregnant to a guy in NA, a...	ayjay	8	1930	Apr 3, 2010 by blender_girl
	April Business Meeting Agenda (4/11/10) (Preview) Agenda Open with Serenity Prayer Review of OP Meeting Chair Schedule Old Business none at present New Business election of Business Meeting Chair election of Business Meeting Secretary Closing with Al-Anon Declaration -- Edited by Courage on Saturday 3rd of April 2010 09:23:37 PM	Courage	0	418	Apr 3, 2010 by Courage
	Smell (Preview) So I went away from our house for a week for a funeral and a business trip. When I got back, I swear, the house smells like beer breath. That alcoholic smell. You know the one. It makes me sick. So what am I doing? NOT going to sit here smelling it and freaking out silently, hating my AH more with every passing...	intothewoods	4	730	Apr 2, 2010 by N8SMOM
	Am I being Unreasonable? (Preview) Okay so this is getting a little on the personal side and I apologize in advance if I offend anyone... Is it unreasonable of me to refuse sex to my A when he is drunk? He is acting like I'm the most unreasonable callous person on the planet and I just tried to nicely explain that I'm not interested in intima...	Love Always Hopes	26	1280	Apr 2, 2010 by Jennifer
	looking for the name of a book (Preview) A while ago someone told me the name of an ACOA book that I could read online. I thought I put it in my favorites but it's gone. Anyway, I would appreciate any help. Thanks	seekingserenity	2	646	Apr 2, 2010 by DreamXL
	freedom is the strangest feeling (Preview) hello again. sorry its been a while. i have been heavily into my studying. am pleased to report that i have passed two of my six tests and am shortly to take number three. my business plan is slowly coming together and i have now got a car so i am completely independant. life should be so good now but i a...	miss lucy	7	866	Apr 2, 2010 by Mattie
	Feeling held hostage (Preview) My daughter A was sober for 60 days going to meetings everyday had a caring sponsor and I thought we were well on our way to sobriety.....until her court hearing. Since her BA level was .404 she was charged with a super extreme dui with a minimum jail sentence of 6 months. We got home and she immediately...	KRS	4	862	Apr 2, 2010 by Gypsy Crow Woman
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.