Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hi family, Thanks for all who replied to my "hurting" post. I love having a safe place to come to vent. Most of the time I am looking for just that a vent. I love also that I can come here and get ESH and NOT advice. I have enough people telling me what to do, and I love that here I can learn from what yo...

SeekingPeace · SeekingPeace

I've been lurking around here for a little while but finally got the courage to join and post my story. I apologize in advance for the length, but it helps me to read other people's experiences...and let's be honest, it's very cathartic to just "get it out." I'm 24 years old, and my mother is a...

angelchar375 · angelchar375

I saw ah over the weekend. He is a drug addict, lately heroin has taken over... And it was our sons 3rd birthday. So he came along. And I did great with handing over the situation to my HP. I didn't get into his stuff. And we actually spent some nice time the next day together. But it was sooo sad to see him. At o...

Festfan · Festfan

Hi all. Its been awhile for me on this board. My A-mom is visiting my sister and I this weekend - STRESS! She went into rehab for the 1st time last summer - 1 week inpatient and a 6 week daily outpatient program (9-5 style). She has been going to meetings 2-3 times a week. During the visit we have learned...

maybethistime · maybethistime

because he feels i'm not being supportive. suppportive to him looks like saying i love you every time we speak, hugging, touching, saying "you can do this" constantly. personally i'm not ready to do any of these things. i have buried my anger but it my fear of this thin ice of new sobriety we a...

lyndebi · lyndebi

8am in Oregon. yuck. Got tired of being taken advantage of. Usually I take it and stew then let it go. It is scarey for me to go to court alone especially. Tenats as usual did not pay their last months rent. They had a security deposit, not a rent deposit. I would have let it go had they been nice when they lef...

Tracy · Tracy

Hi everyone, I have shared how my sober ABF has started to have slips again and how I have used my al anon to handle this effectivly. However after a recent panic attack my Hp sent me a message that he loved me and that it was my time. I care for my Bf but I really think I want t fix me. I can not fix him or anyon...

Acatnip · Acatnip

When you get what you have been asking for, you don't know what to do with it. In the continuing saga that is my life, just yesterday I shared how I felt so unsettled in this new life. Then later on in my day, I heard from AH. Not the same AH I have been used to talking to, this version is now sober and attending h...

Love Always Hopes · Love Always Hopes

The good news is I finally took the step and went to a f2f meeting tonight. It was very good. It was all about Step1 and admitting how we are powerless to change what is outside of ourselves. I admit, I found myself nodding at times and thinking "that's crap!" at others (What do you mean I can...

Gailey · Gailey

This Saturday I will be leaving for a trip to Japan. This is a trip I have been waiting for. It is a trip to meet my new granddaughter, Julia, who was born on 3/27. I will be up in the air for 14 hours straight. That has me stressed to begin with but what I am really afraid of is leaving the A son at home for a week....

maybethistime · maybethistime

How the alcoholic uses anger as a weapon?

Maria123 · Maria123

Happy Birthday (((Rose))) I hope your day was a magical one! Thanks for your service to the program. love in recovery, Maria

saltire · saltire

Hello folks, 1st time back here for about a year and things only worse! I think my wife has been an alcholic for about 12 years now and I'm really hacked off with it - yeah yeah she's a lovely person when sober bla de blah ! But there's no intamacy any more and I really can't be bothered anymore even trying for...

saltire · saltire

I received a PM in response to my MONEY post and below is the reply I gave the kind member, as you will read it's not money worries bugging me now; please read on.... Thank you for your pm. I hope things work out for you. things have taken another twist for me. I learned today my AW drove to work and had to be dri...

MaryPoppins · MaryPoppins

This week started out horrible! My dry drunk husband, who is sick in more ways then one, decided to throw out nearly everything I owned on the front lawn from the floor and my dressers in my bedroom one morning, while I was sorting laundry. "Throw" is not an exagerration! He threw everyt...

Jean4444 · Jean4444

I really liked todays ODAT reading! It is about despair and its relationship to faith. "...when we are troubled and cannot see a way out it is only because WE cannot SEE a way out because we imagine that only WE can find a solution to the trouble" We imagine that all solutions are up to us and...

Ness · Ness

Hi family, my son is in hospital 4 days now. He took three big seizures within the space of 2 hours, luckily his drinking partner had the sense to call the emergency service after the 1st seizure.Funny thing is he called us the night before..........1st since Xmas . He sounded weak and ill on the phone,...

RMM124 · RMM124

I am new here... trying to find a way to deal with the fact that my mother, who was clean and in AA for over 5 years, has now decided to "live life" and drink because she "wants to." I am an only child and she is my only family. I have three kids that supposedly mean the world to her yet s...

joanlee · joanlee

Hello I found out my 32-yr old daughter is an alcoholic about a year ago. Completely dumbfounded, she hid it so well. My husband lost his job two years ago, and has since increased his drinking to around the clock. I can't get past the frustration and the anger. I know my life is unmanageable. I had to canc...

wifeofalcoholic · wifeofalcoholic

I believe that anonymity is crucial and a vital foundation to the Al-Anon meetings. The confidentiality is an integral part of the ability for its members to share and trust. I read a post where a co-worker violated this. I once had a co-worker tell me that she met someone we both know at her Al-Anon...

Rora · Rora

For the past 18 mos of separation from my exaH I've run the gammit on the entire spectrum of emotion. Relief, apprehension, frustration, irritation, anger, hostility, guilt, hurt, pain, disbelief, annoyance, fear....and on and on. Much of the time the undertone of my emotional state has been ve...

angelchar375 · angelchar375

This week has been extra tough for me. My son turned 3 this weekend, and I had been planning his birthday that it seemed like not many people - including some of our closest friends - would be able to attend. But... it was the best day/time for me so I planned away. Then I was concerned my ah would be in town an...

Jerry F · Jerry F

I won't rub it in promise and this is the season and the weekend for the Merrie Monarch (actually the nick name of a prior King...Kalakaua) who insisted on the arts of music and hula and so in his honor every year we have a 4 day competition of hula studios from around the planet who come and present their hu...

Raven68 · Raven68

I had a sponsor online for about a year. Rose got involved in her school work. Due to disability and other factors I cant made it to local meetings. Rose and I met through this site. I need someone I can comunicate with via email and phone. I am in Texas. My cell is (Please PM Raven for her number) My name i...

Mattie · Mattie

I keep forgetting that if I put my hand on the hot stove, I'll get burned. I was checking the state unclaimed property sites, where I'd found some unclaimed property. So then I checked under the names of some friends, and found they had some listed too. So ... then I checked in the name of my ex. So he had s...

Love Always Hopes · Love Always Hopes

I would like to take this Al anon thing to the next step and attend face 2 face meetings, read the lit, get a sponsor, the whole shebang. When I go to look up the meeting schedule, I see that there are meetings with different titles... "Discovering Choices" "Courage to Change" &q...

mow joe · mow joe

My 1st post, so the story could get long. I'll offer the condensed version. My AW has been in & out of treatment for about 2 1/2 years. She's been active in AA when she wants to. She's been in intensive outpatient, 30 day inpatient, psychiatric hospitals (a few short stays), private counseling... s...

Rora · Rora

Just found out that exaH has joined and creeps this board to keep an eye on my posts here. any suggestions to him/me? Rora

Maria123 · Maria123

(((((((((MyMandy)))))))))), Happy Birthday Girlfriend ! ! ! Take a moment to stop and appreciate what a beautiful woman you are, how far you've come in your recovery, and what an attractive program you have. As Karilynn says calories don't count today (ha ha) but I gotta tell ya, they do. I am with...

Jennifer · Jennifer

Hello everyone, <sigh> My xah has begun the angry pouting tantrum. In reply to my letter restating, and the last contact i will make with him, my wish for no contact, I got two letters. The first angry and insisting he would pay me back the money which I never mentioned in my request (not really sur...

lizzakiss · lizzakiss

Hi. This may be a bit off my normal topic but I wasn't sure where to turn. My Abf-sober has a 14 year old son and he is with us every other weekend. He has always been a good kid, my bf never had a father growing up and as a result has always been very involved and hands on (as the ex would let him) with his son. ...

lindseymommyof2 · lindseymommyof2

But I don't know how to get out of it. It feels like I kept my anger in for 5 years (our whole relationship) and now it all boils out...at my Afiance. I feel so mad at myself that I used to yell so much at my kids, and realizing it now that it was because of the craziness going on with my Afiance. I am seeing a ther...

Rora · Rora

Another member here mentioned this quote and I guess it touches me so directly these days. In discussions (lectures) with my exaH he tends to frequently play the card of "I know ... the problem is you don't love me!" And I start to panic. Because I DO love him. There is so much about him and t...

Tracy · Tracy

Hi all, went to a meeting last night topic taking care of ourselves. My ABF got sober last april since November he has started slipping twice when nephew died.then again jan and twice since last week, last night latest occassion. I did not know this when I was in the meeting and have been handling the...

Diva · Diva

It has been so sad to watch him disintegrate. I pity the man; he is so deep into his alcoholism that nothing else matters. I have told him to leave so many times, but always took him back. But now he has gone too far. I cannot live with the mental abuse that he heaps upon me when he drinks; unbelievably aw...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

Hello Friends, It's been awhile since I have posted....I am having one of those days that you know is from living with addiction for so many years. Things were going well, my daughter has no patience for anything....it's almost like the addict that wants it now and their own way and nothing else matter...

shimo · shimo

Hi friends, I am unable to chair the Monday a.m. Al-Anon Meeting. My senior friend requires transportation to her eye doctor and her appointment is sheduled for our meeting time. Hoping another OP can step up for me and if not, hopefully another member will step up. Have a great day! Love in recove...

MissyPoo · MissyPoo

Hi everyone... I am looking for some ESH on how you have handled social functions with your AH. My AH's sister is getting married at the end of May, and of course where there is a wedding, there is alcohol. I know I cannot control whether or not my A drinks at the wedding, or how much, he either will or he wo...

Hurt Nurse · Hurt Nurse

I am so furious. In my Sunday morning Al Anon group and ex coworker was at the last meeting. On Monday morning a guy I work with said "I talked with Chris, he said he saw you at an Al Anon meeting Sunday morning". I thought "nothing left the room". I didn't want people at work to know m...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hi all, As many of you know I just went through a divorce and it wsa final on 03/02. But something I haven't shared here is that during my 90 day waiting period for the divorce to be final, I met someone. I met him online on Facebook of all places lol. We were playing a game in the same room and started chatting...

Acatnip · Acatnip

As I posted here before, I left AH but am having tremendous feelings of guilt and remorse. My head tells me I have done the right thing but I am so heartbroken and guilt filled. I did spend some time with AH since his release from rehab and found him in sorry shape. Physically, he is pale and constant shaki...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hi all, Do any of you who have been around for a while remember the "Mandy and Paul" show? (Paul and I used to chair meetings twice a week in the chat room) We are going to have the live version next week :). (And yes I have his permission to post this). I can't wait....next week I am flying out to th...

Tattyhead · Tattyhead

Just venting because I am feeling absolutely rubbish. I have been to my father's funeral (Tuesday) and it was a lovely service but I did feel somewhat isolated without AH there to support me. I didn't want him there, given the state he is in but his staying away didn't help me feel any better. He was once s...

sdisnie · sdisnie

Starting next week my boys have baseball games every single day. I will now have to start seeing the ex, when I have been able to completely keep him away and out of my life. Having to deal with his presense at these games is terrifing to me. I've been healing because the best thing for me is to not have to...

angelbreeze127 · angelbreeze127

Just wanted to say thanks for the replies... I guess I was a little short with my info... I am the major bread winner btw the 2 of us... I make twice a smuch as he does per week... my name is on everything and his is on nothing other than his account. so, what did I learn from you wonderful friends... I feel for...

ayjay · ayjay

I had a check today with my midwife and was told i was aneamic and could have diabetes due to the pregnancy. I am not suprised I feel ill, have no energy and have not been able to look after myself properly. 2 years of my partner coming and going has brought me to my knees, especially with it being the same al...

PattyW · PattyW

Hi Everyone, My name is Patty and I have a very good friend who I am very concerned about. Over the past couple years we have become very close. He has confided in me that he is a functional alcoholic... he knows there is a problem, but he is unwilling or unable to seek help. He is a wonderful and amazing...

Diva · Diva

Today I found out I can start the mower, and I got most of the lawns mowed. Tomorrow I try the weedeater! LOL I am taking care of the animals singlehandedly; even hired a reputable painter to finish the outside of the house. (the A just dropped everything and walked out.) Calling that "walking o...

Ness · Ness

Travelling back from the funeral of my sis-in-law last week, a long 600 mile trip, my Ason was foremost in my thoughts. Love and loss, funerals trigger many things. I was thinking I feel a bit stronger now in Alanon, maybe I will tweak the boundary a bit and let him come home for a weekend.Well around a 100...

miss lucy · miss lucy

i am so frustrated with AH right now i could cheerfully ............ i dont know what i could cheerfully do? the final decision was taken by me that enough was enough as you know earlier this week. since then AH has been a right royal pain in the you know what!!! he has deliberately come past where i l...

lyndebi · lyndebi

Been sick, my med makes me sleep. Which is ok as I have not had my shoulder fixed yet, pain makes it hard to sleep. Anyway I had a horrible dream. I tend to dream in this same sorta way. Everyone who passed in my life, which is almost everyone, hates me. I mean is so disgusted and ashamed of me. My family was ver...

Aloha · Aloha

It's been a while since I've posted here. My sponsor, god bless her, isn't available for a phone call, though I did call another member and chat for a while... feel a little better but I know my mind and I know my head's going to chew on this for a good deal of time. And it ticks me off because it's the evening a...

DreamsOver · DreamsOver

I feel so shut off from the world around me. I get up, I go to work, I take care of my house and everyone in it. I had to hear today at work the endless talk of successful children, loving grandchildren, lives that seem to glide through life from one accomplishment to the next. I am just relieved if I make it t...

Jerry F · Jerry F

is relief and relaxation, sometimes its relief and happiness and sometimes it is sadness and grief. Got some extra undirected prayers? Got some whispers to your Higher Power ready to go. I'd like to use a couple of them if I may along with my own...Our family just lost a young 29 year old female cousi...

angelbreeze127 · angelbreeze127

My ah and I keep separate checking accounts... for obvious reasons... Unbeknownst to him, I keep tabs on his acc't. Why? Becasue he usually keeps about $150 a week for his crap and I get resentfull if he has got overtime and he doens't offer it up for bills...He doesn't do a good job at this. he has no i...

maybethistime · maybethistime

I've attended a bunch of meetings in the last two weeks. i've purchased one of the books. i'm struggling with letting go control - ie a higher power. i am realizing i am a control freak and one of the reasons i can't believe in "god" or a higher power is that i can't admit that i am powerless/lack...

doublesmommy · doublesmommy

I havent been here in awhile, but I wanted to share the following, cause even though we are divorced I suppose this still affects me and the kids. On February 4, 2010 my X moved back to the small island he was raised on, this after he was arrested and had his license suspended at the end of January for a DUI, a...

Destynee · Destynee

I hit him twice. One was a punch in the face. I'm so incredibly guilty and sick over it. I've been beating myself up since. He disappeared again on Thursday and didn't come back or call. Called Saturday and left me a suicide message again. This is 3 times now. When I didn't respond, he went to the ER...

sdisnie · sdisnie

Everyone has told me over and over my kids will benefit from this split with the A and myself. I have told them that i hid it so well from my kids, my A didn't drink at home...he would disappear and be gone for long periods of time. My kids would think he was working out of town. Everyone says...including...

LynW · LynW

I haven't slept in days....all I do is cry...looking for some peace and inspiration. I have an adult son, a police officer, who is an alcoholic. He was careful...never drank on a day when he was working, but when he was off duty, he drank much more than I realized. A few days into 2010, he had a seizure on...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Positive steps to a better me (Preview) Hi family, Thanks for all who replied to my "hurting" post. I love having a safe place to come to vent. Most of the time I am looking for just that a vent. I love also that I can come here and get ESH and NOT advice. I have enough people telling me what to do, and I love that here I can learn from what yo...	Mandy123	5	891	Apr 14, 2010 by Jean4444
	New here - my story (Preview) I've been lurking around here for a little while but finally got the courage to join and post my story. I apologize in advance for the length, but it helps me to read other people's experiences...and let's be honest, it's very cathartic to just "get it out." I'm 24 years old, and my mother is a...	SeekingPeace	8	1064	Apr 14, 2010 by RLC
	Nightmares (Preview) I saw ah over the weekend. He is a drug addict, lately heroin has taken over... And it was our sons 3rd birthday. So he came along. And I did great with handing over the situation to my HP. I didn't get into his stuff. And we actually spent some nice time the next day together. But it was sooo sad to see him. At o...	angelchar375	5	871	Apr 14, 2010 by Rita G
	What to do/say when they relapse? ESH please (Preview) Hi all. Its been awhile for me on this board. My A-mom is visiting my sister and I this weekend - STRESS! She went into rehab for the 1st time last summer - 1 week inpatient and a 6 week daily outpatient program (9-5 style). She has been going to meetings 2-3 times a week. During the visit we have learned...	Festfan	9	2405	Apr 14, 2010 by mon123
	he is still mad at me... (Preview) because he feels i'm not being supportive. suppportive to him looks like saying i love you every time we speak, hugging, touching, saying "you can do this" constantly. personally i'm not ready to do any of these things. i have buried my anger but it my fear of this thin ice of new sobriety we a...	maybethistime	6	964	Apr 14, 2010 by maybethistime
	Court in morn (Preview) 8am in Oregon. yuck. Got tired of being taken advantage of. Usually I take it and stew then let it go. It is scarey for me to go to court alone especially. Tenats as usual did not pay their last months rent. They had a security deposit, not a rent deposit. I would have let it go had they been nice when they lef...	lyndebi	8	781	Apr 14, 2010 by Ness
	MY TIME (Preview) Hi everyone, I have shared how my sober ABF has started to have slips again and how I have used my al anon to handle this effectivly. However after a recent panic attack my Hp sent me a message that he loved me and that it was my time. I care for my Bf but I really think I want t fix me. I can not fix him or anyon...	Tracy	3	730	Apr 13, 2010 by Jerry F
	Funny How (Preview) When you get what you have been asking for, you don't know what to do with it. In the continuing saga that is my life, just yesterday I shared how I felt so unsettled in this new life. Then later on in my day, I heard from AH. Not the same AH I have been used to talking to, this version is now sober and attending h...	Acatnip	3	1117	Apr 13, 2010 by White Rabbit
	Finally did something...now if patience would just step up the pace!! (Preview) The good news is I finally took the step and went to a f2f meeting tonight. It was very good. It was all about Step1 and admitting how we are powerless to change what is outside of ourselves. I admit, I found myself nodding at times and thinking "that's crap!" at others (What do you mean I can...	Love Always Hopes	5	753	Apr 13, 2010 by White Rabbit
	feeling scared about leaving (Preview) This Saturday I will be leaving for a trip to Japan. This is a trip I have been waiting for. It is a trip to meet my new granddaughter, Julia, who was born on 3/27. I will be up in the air for 14 hours straight. That has me stressed to begin with but what I am really afraid of is leaving the A son at home for a week....	Gailey	13	1540	Apr 13, 2010 by Gailey
	anyone heard of the book... (Preview) How the alcoholic uses anger as a weapon?	maybethistime	2	761	Apr 13, 2010 by maybethistime
	Happy Birthday ~ Imfree2004 (Preview) Happy Birthday (((Rose))) I hope your day was a magical one! Thanks for your service to the program. love in recovery, Maria	Maria123	4	660	Apr 13, 2010 by Karilynn
	no money - no way out (Preview) Hello folks, 1st time back here for about a year and things only worse! I think my wife has been an alcholic for about 12 years now and I'm really hacked off with it - yeah yeah she's a lovely person when sober bla de blah ! But there's no intamacy any more and I really can't be bothered anymore even trying for...	saltire	10	1259	Apr 13, 2010 by CJ recovery
	more MONEY worries ? No, something else..... (Preview) I received a PM in response to my MONEY post and below is the reply I gave the kind member, as you will read it's not money worries bugging me now; please read on.... Thank you for your pm. I hope things work out for you. things have taken another twist for me. I learned today my AW drove to work and had to be dri...	saltire	5	788	Apr 13, 2010 by CJ recovery
	The A's curse turned into a blessing with help from Alanon Tools! (Preview) This week started out horrible! My dry drunk husband, who is sick in more ways then one, decided to throw out nearly everything I owned on the front lawn from the floor and my dressers in my bedroom one morning, while I was sorting laundry. "Throw" is not an exagerration! He threw everyt...	MaryPoppins	6	1481	Apr 12, 2010 by Jerry F
	despair and faith (Preview) I really liked todays ODAT reading! It is about despair and its relationship to faith. "...when we are troubled and cannot see a way out it is only because WE cannot SEE a way out because we imagine that only WE can find a solution to the trouble" We imagine that all solutions are up to us and...	Jean4444	6	2004	Apr 12, 2010 by Jerry F
	Ason in hospital (Preview) Hi family, my son is in hospital 4 days now. He took three big seizures within the space of 2 hours, luckily his drinking partner had the sense to call the emergency service after the 1st seizure.Funny thing is he called us the night before..........1st since Xmas . He sounded weak and ill on the phone,...	Ness	17	984	Apr 12, 2010 by Iamhere
	New...feeling lost, angry, sad etc (Preview) I am new here... trying to find a way to deal with the fact that my mother, who was clean and in AA for over 5 years, has now decided to "live life" and drink because she "wants to." I am an only child and she is my only family. I have three kids that supposedly mean the world to her yet s...	RMM124	10	876	Apr 12, 2010 by Iamhere
	New and struggling (Preview) Hello I found out my 32-yr old daughter is an alcoholic about a year ago. Completely dumbfounded, she hid it so well. My husband lost his job two years ago, and has since increased his drinking to around the clock. I can't get past the frustration and the anger. I know my life is unmanageable. I had to canc...	joanlee	9	1027	Apr 12, 2010 by joanlee
	Anonymity (Preview) I believe that anonymity is crucial and a vital foundation to the Al-Anon meetings. The confidentiality is an integral part of the ability for its members to share and trust. I read a post where a co-worker violated this. I once had a co-worker tell me that she met someone we both know at her Al-Anon...	wifeofalcoholic	4	735	Apr 12, 2010 by xeno59
	Anger replaced with painful sadness... (Preview) For the past 18 mos of separation from my exaH I've run the gammit on the entire spectrum of emotion. Relief, apprehension, frustration, irritation, anger, hostility, guilt, hurt, pain, disbelief, annoyance, fear....and on and on. Much of the time the undertone of my emotional state has been ve...	Rora	5	1466	Apr 12, 2010 by xeno59
	Handing over some tough stuff... (Preview) This week has been extra tough for me. My son turned 3 this weekend, and I had been planning his birthday that it seemed like not many people - including some of our closest friends - would be able to attend. But... it was the best day/time for me so I planned away. Then I was concerned my ah would be in town an...	angelchar375	2	821	Apr 11, 2010 by Jerry F
	Healthy distractions... (Preview) I won't rub it in promise and this is the season and the weekend for the Merrie Monarch (actually the nick name of a prior King...Kalakaua) who insisted on the arts of music and hula and so in his honor every year we have a 4 day competition of hula studios from around the planet who come and present their hu...	Jerry F	8	915	Apr 11, 2010 by Jerry F
	I need a new sponsor badly (Preview) I had a sponsor online for about a year. Rose got involved in her school work. Due to disability and other factors I cant made it to local meetings. Rose and I met through this site. I need someone I can comunicate with via email and phone. I am in Texas. My cell is (Please PM Raven for her number) My name i...	Raven68	1	790	Apr 11, 2010 by Melissa21
	I put my hand on the hot stove again (Preview) I keep forgetting that if I put my hand on the hot stove, I'll get burned. I was checking the state unclaimed property sites, where I'd found some unclaimed property. So then I checked under the names of some friends, and found they had some listed too. So ... then I checked in the name of my ex. So he had s...	Mattie	8	1365	Apr 11, 2010 by Mattie
	First Step... (Preview) I would like to take this Al anon thing to the next step and attend face 2 face meetings, read the lit, get a sponsor, the whole shebang. When I go to look up the meeting schedule, I see that there are meetings with different titles... "Discovering Choices" "Courage to Change" &q...	Love Always Hopes	6	1159	Apr 11, 2010 by ythannah
	Hard to stop talking to AW when the kids are involved (Preview) My 1st post, so the story could get long. I'll offer the condensed version. My AW has been in & out of treatment for about 2 1/2 years. She's been active in AA when she wants to. She's been in intensive outpatient, 30 day inpatient, psychiatric hospitals (a few short stays), private counseling... s...	mow joe	10	774	Apr 11, 2010 by mow joe
	Any suggestions for when the exaH creeps this board?? (Preview) Just found out that exaH has joined and creeps this board to keep an eye on my posts here. any suggestions to him/me? Rora	Rora	11	684	Apr 11, 2010 by CJ recovery
	Happy Birthday MyMandy123Girl (Preview) (((((((((MyMandy)))))))))), Happy Birthday Girlfriend ! ! ! Take a moment to stop and appreciate what a beautiful woman you are, how far you've come in your recovery, and what an attractive program you have. As Karilynn says calories don't count today (ha ha) but I gotta tell ya, they do. I am with...	Maria123	6	730	Apr 11, 2010 by Melissa21
	the pouting begins (Preview) Hello everyone, <sigh> My xah has begun the angry pouting tantrum. In reply to my letter restating, and the last contact i will make with him, my wish for no contact, I got two letters. The first angry and insisting he would pay me back the money which I never mentioned in my request (not really sur...	Jennifer	4	1006	Apr 11, 2010 by kitty
	Please, I need your HELP!! (Preview) Hi. This may be a bit off my normal topic but I wasn't sure where to turn. My Abf-sober has a 14 year old son and he is with us every other weekend. He has always been a good kid, my bf never had a father growing up and as a result has always been very involved and hands on (as the ex would let him) with his son. ...	lizzakiss	4	872	Apr 11, 2010 by xeno59
	I want to be out of the Anger stage... (Preview) But I don't know how to get out of it. It feels like I kept my anger in for 5 years (our whole relationship) and now it all boils out...at my Afiance. I feel so mad at myself that I used to yell so much at my kids, and realizing it now that it was because of the craziness going on with my Afiance. I am seeing a ther...	lindseymommyof2	10	1373	Apr 11, 2010 by xeno59
	"sometimes love is not enough"... (Preview) Another member here mentioned this quote and I guess it touches me so directly these days. In discussions (lectures) with my exaH he tends to frequently play the card of "I know ... the problem is you don't love me!" And I start to panic. Because I DO love him. There is so much about him and t...	Rora	6	1214	Apr 11, 2010 by xeno59
	taking care of myself, HOW? (Preview) Hi all, went to a meeting last night topic taking care of ourselves. My ABF got sober last april since November he has started slipping twice when nephew died.then again jan and twice since last week, last night latest occassion. I did not know this when I was in the meeting and have been handling the...	Tracy	4	1041	Apr 11, 2010 by xeno59
	He's out of my house, but not out of my heart. (Preview) It has been so sad to watch him disintegrate. I pity the man; he is so deep into his alcoholism that nothing else matters. I have told him to leave so many times, but always took him back. But now he has gone too far. I cannot live with the mental abuse that he heaps upon me when he drinks; unbelievably aw...	Diva	15	963	Apr 11, 2010 by One4Life
	The lasting affects of living with Addiction (Preview) Hello Friends, It's been awhile since I have posted....I am having one of those days that you know is from living with addiction for so many years. Things were going well, my daughter has no patience for anything....it's almost like the addict that wants it now and their own way and nothing else matter...	Andrea12	3	649	Apr 11, 2010 by Karilynn
	MONDAY A.M. Al-ANON MEETING (Preview) Hi friends, I am unable to chair the Monday a.m. Al-Anon Meeting. My senior friend requires transportation to her eye doctor and her appointment is sheduled for our meeting time. Hoping another OP can step up for me and if not, hopefully another member will step up. Have a great day! Love in recove...	shimo	0	489	Apr 11, 2010 by shimo
	ESH needed on how to handle social functions with an A (Preview) Hi everyone... I am looking for some ESH on how you have handled social functions with your AH. My AH's sister is getting married at the end of May, and of course where there is a wedding, there is alcohol. I know I cannot control whether or not my A drinks at the wedding, or how much, he either will or he wo...	MissyPoo	5	1038	Apr 11, 2010 by MissyPoo
	someone at my al anon group told a coworker that I was gong to al anon! I thought it was ANON!!! (Preview) I am so furious. In my Sunday morning Al Anon group and ex coworker was at the last meeting. On Monday morning a guy I work with said "I talked with Chris, he said he saw you at an Al Anon meeting Sunday morning". I thought "nothing left the room". I didn't want people at work to know m...	Hurt Nurse	8	1844	Apr 11, 2010 by Mattie
	Hurting (Preview) Hi all, As many of you know I just went through a divorce and it wsa final on 03/02. But something I haven't shared here is that during my 90 day waiting period for the divorce to be final, I met someone. I met him online on Facebook of all places lol. We were playing a game in the same room and started chatting...	Mandy123	13	843	Apr 10, 2010 by Maria123
	Guilt and Grieving (Preview) As I posted here before, I left AH but am having tremendous feelings of guilt and remorse. My head tells me I have done the right thing but I am so heartbroken and guilt filled. I did spend some time with AH since his release from rehab and found him in sorry shape. Physically, he is pale and constant shaki...	Acatnip	4	1232	Apr 10, 2010 by Jennifer
	Do you remember? (Preview) Hi all, Do any of you who have been around for a while remember the "Mandy and Paul" show? (Paul and I used to chair meetings twice a week in the chat room) We are going to have the live version next week :). (And yes I have his permission to post this). I can't wait....next week I am flying out to th...	Mandy123	4	1080	Apr 10, 2010 by grammie
	How much more? (Preview) Just venting because I am feeling absolutely rubbish. I have been to my father's funeral (Tuesday) and it was a lovely service but I did feel somewhat isolated without AH there to support me. I didn't want him there, given the state he is in but his staying away didn't help me feel any better. He was once s...	Tattyhead	8	1299	Apr 10, 2010 by hotrod
	How can I deal with having to see X-A at kids baseball games every day for the next few months?? (Preview) Starting next week my boys have baseball games every single day. I will now have to start seeing the ex, when I have been able to completely keep him away and out of my life. Having to deal with his presense at these games is terrifing to me. I've been healing because the best thing for me is to not have to...	sdisnie	3	808	Apr 10, 2010 by Loupiness
	ah's checking account them... part 2 (Preview) Just wanted to say thanks for the replies... I guess I was a little short with my info... I am the major bread winner btw the 2 of us... I make twice a smuch as he does per week... my name is on everything and his is on nothing other than his account. so, what did I learn from you wonderful friends... I feel for...	angelbreeze127	4	1211	Apr 9, 2010 by abbyal
	Physically ill with all the stress (Preview) I had a check today with my midwife and was told i was aneamic and could have diabetes due to the pregnancy. I am not suprised I feel ill, have no energy and have not been able to look after myself properly. 2 years of my partner coming and going has brought me to my knees, especially with it being the same al...	ayjay	9	1321	Apr 9, 2010 by ayjay
	Should I contact his family... (Preview) Hi Everyone, My name is Patty and I have a very good friend who I am very concerned about. Over the past couple years we have become very close. He has confided in me that he is a functional alcoholic... he knows there is a problem, but he is unwilling or unable to seek help. He is a wonderful and amazing...	PattyW	11	1042	Apr 9, 2010 by White Rabbit
	Day five and doing well. (Preview) Today I found out I can start the mower, and I got most of the lawns mowed. Tomorrow I try the weedeater! LOL I am taking care of the animals singlehandedly; even hired a reputable painter to finish the outside of the house. (the A just dropped everything and walked out.) Calling that "walking o...	Diva	9	990	Apr 9, 2010 by tlcate
	Just when my boundaries were slipping......... (Preview) Travelling back from the funeral of my sis-in-law last week, a long 600 mile trip, my Ason was foremost in my thoughts. Love and loss, funerals trigger many things. I was thinking I feel a bit stronger now in Alanon, maybe I will tweak the boundary a bit and let him come home for a weekend.Well around a 100...	Ness	6	921	Apr 9, 2010 by Ness
	AH just wont go away and leave me in peace. (Preview) i am so frustrated with AH right now i could cheerfully ............ i dont know what i could cheerfully do? the final decision was taken by me that enough was enough as you know earlier this week. since then AH has been a right royal pain in the you know what!!! he has deliberately come past where i l...	miss lucy	6	788	Apr 9, 2010 by China
	dreams, what does it all mean (Preview) Been sick, my med makes me sleep. Which is ok as I have not had my shoulder fixed yet, pain makes it hard to sleep. Anyway I had a horrible dream. I tend to dream in this same sorta way. Everyone who passed in my life, which is almost everyone, hates me. I mean is so disgusted and ashamed of me. My family was ver...	lyndebi	2	699	Apr 9, 2010 by lyndebi
	Got roped again (Preview) It's been a while since I've posted here. My sponsor, god bless her, isn't available for a phone call, though I did call another member and chat for a while... feel a little better but I know my mind and I know my head's going to chew on this for a good deal of time. And it ticks me off because it's the evening a...	Aloha	5	794	Apr 8, 2010 by saltire
	Isolation (Preview) I feel so shut off from the world around me. I get up, I go to work, I take care of my house and everyone in it. I had to hear today at work the endless talk of successful children, loving grandchildren, lives that seem to glide through life from one accomplishment to the next. I am just relieved if I make it t...	DreamsOver	9	980	Apr 8, 2010 by tlcate
	Sometimes the consequences of powerlessness... (Preview) is relief and relaxation, sometimes its relief and happiness and sometimes it is sadness and grief. Got some extra undirected prayers? Got some whispers to your Higher Power ready to go. I'd like to use a couple of them if I may along with my own...Our family just lost a young 29 year old female cousi...	Jerry F	21	1057	Apr 8, 2010 by tlcate
	feeling guilty... should I? (Preview) My ah and I keep separate checking accounts... for obvious reasons... Unbeknownst to him, I keep tabs on his acc't. Why? Becasue he usually keeps about $150 a week for his crap and I get resentfull if he has got overtime and he doens't offer it up for bills...He doesn't do a good job at this. he has no i...	angelbreeze127	7	871	Apr 8, 2010 by Jerry F
	struggling with higher power (Preview) I've attended a bunch of meetings in the last two weeks. i've purchased one of the books. i'm struggling with letting go control - ie a higher power. i am realizing i am a control freak and one of the reasons i can't believe in "god" or a higher power is that i can't admit that i am powerless/lack...	maybethistime	14	1565	Apr 8, 2010 by Diva
	He finally hit rock bottom literally (Preview) I havent been here in awhile, but I wanted to share the following, cause even though we are divorced I suppose this still affects me and the kids. On February 4, 2010 my X moved back to the small island he was raised on, this after he was arrested and had his license suspended at the end of January for a DUI, a...	doublesmommy	13	829	Apr 8, 2010 by doublesmommy
	I hit my AH today. (Preview) I hit him twice. One was a punch in the face. I'm so incredibly guilty and sick over it. I've been beating myself up since. He disappeared again on Thursday and didn't come back or call. Called Saturday and left me a suicide message again. This is 3 times now. When I didn't respond, he went to the ER...	Destynee	12	764	Apr 8, 2010 by evaangel
	My kids were clueless to the problem (Preview) Everyone has told me over and over my kids will benefit from this split with the A and myself. I have told them that i hid it so well from my kids, my A didn't drink at home...he would disappear and be gone for long periods of time. My kids would think he was working out of town. Everyone says...including...	sdisnie	6	899	Apr 7, 2010 by mon123
	I am Lyn... I am new to all this and really hurting right now (Preview) I haven't slept in days....all I do is cry...looking for some peace and inspiration. I have an adult son, a police officer, who is an alcoholic. He was careful...never drank on a day when he was working, but when he was off duty, he drank much more than I realized. A few days into 2010, he had a seizure on...	LynW	13	1321	Apr 7, 2010 by Ness
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.