Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

never going back · never going back

It has only been 2 days since I found this site (is that possible??? seems like much longer!). I don"t know how I"ve made it this long without it. I have read through your posts, visited the chat room, attended 2 of the on-line meetings, written several posts of my own(I guess its normal to pos...

CatherineR · CatherineR

I am very worried about my son. He is 23 and drinks every day. He has been drunk four times this week already. He lives with me, he has a full time job. He is rude when he drinks. I don't want to enable him, but I don't really want to kick him out. He has lost his license for drinking and driving, and been charged...

chauri · chauri

Hi all, I'm Chauri. I haven't been posting message in a long time. Today, I'm in a fix. It's probably my fault. I need to make amends and don't know how. Well to make the story ahort, my A hasn't been drinking in a while. But instead of alcohol, he is into pain meds. which is the same thing ,as far as I'm concer...

RoseODAT · RoseODAT

I haven't been on here in a long time....but thank my HP for this forrum for I needed to share and listen to others as well ASAP.... I have two little ones, quit my job to go to school full-time as I was doing both......and the last thing I want to worry about is AH. When the insanity comes and goes for almost s...

malady · malady

What is serenity? I don't think I ever =eally knew or experienced serenity. It wasn't part of my vocabulary and it =ertainly wasn't part of my daily life. Until I found al-anon =nd all it had to offer me. Before al-anon my idea of serenity was making sure =veryone was happy. A people pleaser who put ever...

shimo · shimo

I regret that I am, once again, unable to chair the Monday a.m. meeting. My 87 year old aunt is having medical issues relating to her pacemaker and I need to be at the hospital with her all day. Hoping someone will be able to step up and chair for me. Thanks. Love in recovery, Shimo aka Jeri

Andrea12 · Andrea12

Happy Fathers Day to all of you wonderful father's out there. May you day be filled with joy, love and happiness....Have a wonderful day you deserve it. With Love, Andrea

Karilynn · Karilynn

((((Family)))), Just wanted to take a moment to wish all you Dads a very Happy Father's Day. I hope it is happy, joyous and perfect in every way for you. On this day I think of both my Dad & my beloved Tim whom I lost on the same day 10 years apart. I know they are looking down on me, along with my grandd...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

samantha and kendra birthday number 2

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

It is still rough, but I am pulling through the no sleep, crying period! I really do need to remember to be grateful & not so damn pissed off! I just need a break & it seems like every time I do, another issue disturbs my sleep. I was really pissed off this morning! Now that I am sitting here @ this...

kerling · kerling

Hi, all. I am not quite new in online AA groups, I joined first many years ago, but since the U.S.A. can be so different to where I used to live, I somehow didn't feel comfortable. Anyway, I am an alcoholic, free from Baccus for 8 years now (before, in 1991 I had 3-4 years sober). I have been living with an alc...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

So much is going on & I feel somewhat overwhelmed! My mind has been somewhat absent & my emotions are on my sleeve lately! I need a long bath & a break! Unfortunately, I have no bath tub to sit in--cracks on the tub... what can I do? accept the things I cannot change. so, I go for a walk, get on t...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am having a really bad day today! Since the beginning of this week I have had a bunch of reasons to cry & I do mean cry! I am losing my serenity & don't know what to do! So much is going on that I feel trapped in my head & can't get out! This week has been pretty difficult because the plumber calle...

Gailey · Gailey

My son's ex-wife has decided to let my A son pick his daughters up today and bring them to my house. I am feeling a little angst about this but am trying to turn it over. She has a boundary in place which is a good thing. The only way he is allowed to take them in the car is if she is the one who sees him when he pick...

mavis · mavis

This board is so full of perspective and kindness, maybe you can help. My husband who had been sober on and off for five years, is drinking again. For months, he had been "hiding" his drinking which is pretty pitiful since he was falling down drunk on several occassions. But I didn't real...

Cosmos · Cosmos

Hi I have just been to see my councillor this morning. She gave me a book that she might think will help me to read in this week. It's called "Codependency No More" by Melody Beattie. I have already started absorbing the book at it seems to describe me and how I feel like I have never seen before....

arizona · arizona

My mom is in AA and is something like 4 months sober, and honestly, this is the first step I've taken to trying to understand everything. Right now, my mom and I aren't speaking. But here's some history - sorry if it's long, I'll try to only hit the important points. Growing up, she would be what I would pro...

TampaGirl · TampaGirl

Okay. So, I joined last week. So glad I did. Also went to my first f2f meeting on Saturday. My A was released from rehab on Friday, June 11. I picked him up from the airport on Saturday, June 12. He was drunk. We spent Sunday together. I told him people make mistakes, and he said he was going to make his 90 in 90...

Ness · Ness

My son is still waiting on bedspace becoming available in the detox unit. Yes, due to cutbacks, there are only so many beds in one unit to cover a radius of around 200 miles where alcoholism is probably the major disease. Anyway I am powerless over that, he is top of the list and hopefully next week.All is...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

Jerry F · Jerry F

The new mother board is installed...obviously and the computer is computing so from my own desk I'm back in the MIP room with family. I didn't cause it, couldn't control it and couldn't cure it. I had to have other people in my life to do for me what I could not and would not do for myself. Isn't that a les...

Tattyhead · Tattyhead

Have just returned from hospital appointment with AH. Consultant said that the condition of AH's liver would not in itself cause the constant diarrhoea and vomiting which he has been experiencing over last 2 months or so. He thinks "there's something else going on" and wanted to admit hi...

Cosmos · Cosmos

Hi I have been writing here on this forum many times about my alcoholic ex-girlfriend and the fact that we are not supposed to have any contact while she does the steps in AA. She called me yesterday. And unlike last time, there was no crisis this time. Last time she asked me to help her out with money for he...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

(((((((((((Friends)))))))))), Been a while since I have posted. So much has been going on....son finally graduated high school. Hip Hip Horrah....lol....I have started school...oh lord it is hard, but I am getting the hang of it....I am taking classes for medical billiing and Medical Coding o...

Jozie · Jozie

So I did as I stated... I went to my F2F on Friday :) Seen alot of faces I don't get to see at my Sunday night, that & the room was full so it was wonderful... ESH all over the place ;) Even Made a Joke at the meeting that I was thinking about finding a Way to Stick The Serenity Prayer to my Dash for the trip (thi...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

So it's been quite a while since I have been here and wanted to give a little update on my life... Oldest daughter remains unmarried and it looks like that is not going to happen. I got her a cell phone which has been an excellent enforcement tool and she has become much easier to live with. I have stopped...

Clear4 · Clear4

I have been in Alan-on inconsistently since early 80's. Sometimes comfortable and sometimes not. What's the deal with the Lord's prayer as "Alan-on is not allied with any sect, DENOMINATION, political affiliation institution or organization". It was recently brought up in mee...

never going back · never going back

Another sleepless night. I confronted my AH laast evening with the fact that I know he's drinking again, after a year and a half of sobriety. His response? Of COURSE he's drinking again, after all he's been through, who wouldn't? He feels that if I really want to help him, I will support him (not his drin...

never going back · never going back

Can anyone recommend some books that you found particularly helpful on the subject of dealing with an alcoholic spouse? I am going to be in St. Louis tomorrow and would like to pick up some books to try to help me sort things out. I know I've heard the title "Getting Them Sober" mentioned seve...

zhotdogs99 · zhotdogs99

I feel like I have nothing left to give. Maybe that's been part of my sickness - giving too much of myself - but after this past year of focusing on myself and working on ME with my Alanon group, I just feel like I'm ready to go. I'm ready to let my AF live his own life and be free to make his own decisions. I'm...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

THANKS TO EVERYONE WHO POSTS WHEN THEY ARE ABLE! I HAVE GOTTEN SO MANY GOOD RESPONSES FROM SO MANY PEOPLE. LYNDEBI: THANKS FOR MENTIONING THE JOURNALING IDEA! I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO DO THAT EVERY DAY BUT ONLY GET THE CHANCE ONCE IN A WHILE. SOMETIMES I FEEL THAT I AM TOO DEEP! I GET SO CAUGHT UP IN MY HEAD! TO...

Shawn412 · Shawn412

Very frustrated here in Steeler Town and for once, it's not because of Big Ben. My wife (who just finished her 2nd month-long rehab a few weeks ago) and I had our 11th anniversary yesterday. Our plan was for her to take antabuse once a week per prescription with me to administer it every Sunday. Sh...

Cosmos · Cosmos

Hi I have been feeling better and better since I came into Al-Anon. It's been ups and downs, but the trend is that it's getting better. I have even managed to be happy about little things in Life. I miss my alcoholic ex-girlfriend still. I have no contact with her and have been able to stop looking into her...

never going back · never going back

I am new here, but after reading through others experiences, it seems that maybe this is where I need to be. My husband has been an alcoholic for 40 years. Things got so far out of control 3 years ago that he finally began trying to get help. When I finally went through with my threats to leave him, he joined...

annmarie · annmarie

It's a long while since I've been here. I have been by myself for a long time now, since breaking up with my abf. I am now very scared of new relationships and don't know where to start. I don't have much experience of healthy relationships and am feeling overpowered. I've been working on my self esteem a...

Tattyhead · Tattyhead

Just how much more can one person take? I have posted before about AH - now in end stages of alcoholism with liver and kidneys affected. He spends all time in bed - doesn't eat - just drinks and smokes. I have to marvel about how much the body can physically take. He still manages to drag himself over to loca...

Hopeless · Hopeless

I know i've been questioning Al anon lately with all of my craziness BUT... This is the first time in over 3 years I'm not nervous going home on a Friday night... LOVE IT!!!!

Bettina · Bettina

Hi everyone, Today I got a phone call from my XAH, he can hardly speak and he is in pain, so I called the paramedics, they had to break down the door because he was too weak to unlock it. They took him to the ER and he is in ICU in critical condition, his blood count was dangerously low, and he has internal bleed...

Hopeless · Hopeless

When someone describes their A (whether it be a drunk or dry drunk) how much a like they all are.... When I read the majority of these post I see my A in almost every one of them, it amazes me = /

maresie · maresie

when I was subsumed in the martyr role, doing far beyond any boundary for the ex A or for my roommates (I cleaned up for a long time), I had no idea how I came across to others. I felt noble, giving and responsible. Now years into recovery I can see that I alienated many many people when I gave what I didn't h...

zen78 · zen78

It's been a while since I posted here last time. I'm so lost. I started going to the meetings, but it's so hard for me to keep my peace everytime I talk to my alcoholic/addict husband. I think that he's having a rough time right now. He's now going back to the dark days after being sober and clean for a year...

glad · glad

my A (live in for 7 years, due to my not wanting to get married until I feel I can accept alcoholism for the rest of my life or he gets sober) boyfriend has so many many issues that I don't know where the emotional abuse from is childhood blends with the Alcoholism from his childhood and his current alcoho...

DreamsOver · DreamsOver

Your words and experiences has given my strength, I know it is time to let him own his bad choices. God Bless you all.

Love Always Hopes · Love Always Hopes

It's been awhile since I've been online as much is going on...I finally got the courage to leave my ABF about a month ago. I am going through counseling and he is supposedly attending church, AA & is meeting regularly with his sponsor. There have been some WONDERFUL conversations. Conversati...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((Family))), Let's keep our David in our thoughts and prayers this morning as he has surgery. I'm sure all will be well and our Elvis will be back with us real soon. I'll post as soon as I know anything. Thank you, Karilynn & Pipers Kitty

canadianguy · canadianguy

Just go sent an interesting article of something we can look out for on tv in the coming months... Tom MILLION-SELLING "GETTING THEM SOBER" BOOK FEATURED IN FILM by NATIONAL INSTITUTES OF MENTAL HEALTH Baltimore---- June 11, 2010 SAMHSA (national offices of U.S. substance abuse...

Jennifer · Jennifer

The prgram works. To paraphrase the daily reading from Words to live by A Day At A Time; when the philsopher Jung was asked if he believed in God he replied "I do not believe I know" This is how I feel about AlAnon and everyone's HP, I don't have to believe I know because I see it every day. In peop...

DreamsOver · DreamsOver

My addicted son was arrested last night for resiting arrest after a fight he had with his drug friends. He is now in jail and calling me to come get him out, the bail bondsmen just called and wanted to know when I could come and pay him the bail to have my son released. I don't want to pay this or get involved w...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((Family))), Installment #2 of why cats are like addicts. For those of you who have read my post Cats are like addicts and dogs are like codependents, here's another example. True to cat/addict form: Pipers is outside focusing on one thing: Dinner, not from a can but one she can hunt. We have a gorge...

wunderbar · wunderbar

Hi all. It's been a while since I first posted, but I had a feeling I would end up coming back. Haven't (yet) made it to a face-to-face meeting, but seriously thinking about it soon. Anyway, my h is at the bar. I have no idea when he'll be home. It's almost 2am now and he has work in the morning. I'm trying hard...

shimo · shimo

I am unable to chair the meeting Monday a.m. There is a tour of my home by the Real Estate folks and I need to vacant my home for the morning hours. Hopefully, someone will be able to step up and chair for me. Thanks, Shimo aka Jeri

kerry5 · kerry5

Sorry again i need chair again this week. Will be back to chairing sunday next week Thanks kerry (aka kerisha)

Ness · Ness

Why I need my meetings....part 2.......The Prodigal Returns.....So I was just heading to bed Wed night when I heard the kitchen door open and a hushed discussion ensue between husb & a voice I havent heard for many months, the son I love with all my heart.....I stayed calm............a miracle o...

Cosmos · Cosmos

I have just read a long article online about codependency. I fit the pattern all too well. One thing that characterizes a codependent person is a low feeling of self. This makes me think of the time I spent in therapy last year, when I said to my therapist that I dont see myself as a person. I still find it di...

DreamsOver · DreamsOver

my addicted son's 30th birthday. I called to let him know I have his birthday cake ready, the voice on the other end of the line with it's slurred speech, and biting remarks let me know how he plans to celebrate today. I should know better than to get my hopes up, but you still catch yourself wishing. Love...

Voyger52 · Voyger52

My steps son is just out of Jail and the drug dealers and calling him already. I tell him not to get back in the same routine. But I dont think he hears me.

Holly09 · Holly09

My A called and said he didn't think he should drive home, I am thankful for that so many times he did drive when he shouldn't. We had a fight this week (he was sober) and of course it was mostly about what I had to change that made him stressed out etc. but also about how I get no emotional support from him, he...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I JUST WANTED TO UPDATE MY CURRENT SITUATION WITH GETTING MY BR CONSULTATION & EVERYTHING THAT IS GOING THUS FAR! I AM SO NERVOUS & SCARED TO DO IT! IT IS A LONG DRAWN OUT RECOVERY! I WILL HAVE TO REALLY CONSIDER IT MORE BEFORE I DO IT! IT IS 7,600 DOLLARS BUT MY MOM IS TAKING CARE OF IT SO THAT ISN'T A...

Jozie · Jozie

Well I'm still on my Roller Coaster, for sure... But Today is a beautiful Day So trying to find the brighter side of things... Little "Belly Nervous" about this weekend tho... many that know me know that my Neice & Nephew moved FAR From me, and have been gone since last July.... So I have...

TampaGirl · TampaGirl

Hi all, I've been perusing the site and you all seem like a very nice group of people. I hope you don't mind me joining in. My husband comes home tomorrow after 4 weeks in a detox/rehab program. I have read lots about detaching, etc., but am still just so resentful. 6 weeks ago (even before he went into the p...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	your compassion has rocked my world (Preview) It has only been 2 days since I found this site (is that possible??? seems like much longer!). I don"t know how I"ve made it this long without it. I have read through your posts, visited the chat room, attended 2 of the on-line meetings, written several posts of my own(I guess its normal to pos...	never going back	10	1026	Jun 21, 2010 by Mynameismom
	New Here (Preview) I am very worried about my son. He is 23 and drinks every day. He has been drunk four times this week already. He lives with me, he has a full time job. He is rude when he drinks. I don't want to enable him, but I don't really want to kick him out. He has lost his license for drinking and driving, and been charged...	CatherineR	11	620	Jun 21, 2010 by Mynameismom
	My fault ot is it? (Preview) Hi all, I'm Chauri. I haven't been posting message in a long time. Today, I'm in a fix. It's probably my fault. I need to make amends and don't know how. Well to make the story ahort, my A hasn't been drinking in a while. But instead of alcohol, he is into pain meds. which is the same thing ,as far as I'm concer...	chauri	6	888	Jun 21, 2010 by chauri
	The importance in "Keep coming back" (Preview) I haven't been on here in a long time....but thank my HP for this forrum for I needed to share and listen to others as well ASAP.... I have two little ones, quit my job to go to school full-time as I was doing both......and the last thing I want to worry about is AH. When the insanity comes and goes for almost s...	RoseODAT	4	1139	Jun 21, 2010 by barisax
	serenity and me (Preview) What is serenity? I don't think I ever =eally knew or experienced serenity. It wasn't part of my vocabulary and it =ertainly wasn't part of my daily life. Until I found al-anon =nd all it had to offer me. Before al-anon my idea of serenity was making sure =veryone was happy. A people pleaser who put ever...	malady	3	1132	Jun 21, 2010 by Bettina
	MONDAY A.M. AL-ANON MEETING (Preview) I regret that I am, once again, unable to chair the Monday a.m. meeting. My 87 year old aunt is having medical issues relating to her pacemaker and I need to be at the hospital with her all day. Hoping someone will be able to step up and chair for me. Thanks. Love in recovery, Shimo aka Jeri	shimo	0	469	Jun 20, 2010 by shimo
	Happy Fathers Day (Preview) Happy Fathers Day to all of you wonderful father's out there. May you day be filled with joy, love and happiness....Have a wonderful day you deserve it. With Love, Andrea	Andrea12	3	827	Jun 20, 2010 by RLC
	Happy Father's Day! (Preview) ((((Family)))), Just wanted to take a moment to wish all you Dads a very Happy Father's Day. I hope it is happy, joyous and perfect in every way for you. On this day I think of both my Dad & my beloved Tim whom I lost on the same day 10 years apart. I know they are looking down on me, along with my grandd...	Karilynn	2	694	Jun 20, 2010 by RLC
	My beautiful girls. (Preview) samantha and kendra birthday number 2	Andrea12	6	1311	Jun 20, 2010 by Andrea12
	time will tell... (Preview) It is still rough, but I am pulling through the no sleep, crying period! I really do need to remember to be grateful & not so damn pissed off! I just need a break & it seems like every time I do, another issue disturbs my sleep. I was really pissed off this morning! Now that I am sitting here @ this...	Hoot Nanny	2	798	Jun 19, 2010 by Bettina
	DSM psychopath or just plain alcoholic? (Preview) Hi, all. I am not quite new in online AA groups, I joined first many years ago, but since the U.S.A. can be so different to where I used to live, I somehow didn't feel comfortable. Anyway, I am an alcoholic, free from Baccus for 8 years now (before, in 1991 I had 3-4 years sober). I have been living with an alc...	kerling	14	4355	Jun 19, 2010 by shebear
	what do I do with all this anxiety...? (Preview) So much is going on & I feel somewhat overwhelmed! My mind has been somewhat absent & my emotions are on my sleeve lately! I need a long bath & a break! Unfortunately, I have no bath tub to sit in--cracks on the tub... what can I do? accept the things I cannot change. so, I go for a walk, get on t...	Hoot Nanny	3	695	Jun 19, 2010 by Mobirdie
	having a bad day--can't stop crying! (Preview) I am having a really bad day today! Since the beginning of this week I have had a bunch of reasons to cry & I do mean cry! I am losing my serenity & don't know what to do! So much is going on that I feel trapped in my head & can't get out! This week has been pretty difficult because the plumber calle...	Hoot Nanny	5	1109	Jun 19, 2010 by Karilynn
	turning it over (Preview) My son's ex-wife has decided to let my A son pick his daughters up today and bring them to my house. I am feeling a little angst about this but am trying to turn it over. She has a boundary in place which is a good thing. The only way he is allowed to take them in the car is if she is the one who sees him when he pick...	Gailey	3	833	Jun 19, 2010 by Karilynn
	Dry Drunk - Drinking again...need advice. (Preview) This board is so full of perspective and kindness, maybe you can help. My husband who had been sober on and off for five years, is drinking again. For months, he had been "hiding" his drinking which is pretty pitiful since he was falling down drunk on several occassions. But I didn't real...	mavis	5	1569	Jun 19, 2010 by JimmyX
	I'm feeling better than I have done for ages! (Preview) Hi I have just been to see my councillor this morning. She gave me a book that she might think will help me to read in this week. It's called "Codependency No More" by Melody Beattie. I have already started absorbing the book at it seems to describe me and how I feel like I have never seen before....	Cosmos	3	843	Jun 19, 2010 by Jerry F
	This is where I'm starting - can you help me understand? (Preview) My mom is in AA and is something like 4 months sober, and honestly, this is the first step I've taken to trying to understand everything. Right now, my mom and I aren't speaking. But here's some history - sorry if it's long, I'll try to only hit the important points. Growing up, she would be what I would pro...	arizona	10	870	Jun 19, 2010 by abbyal
	Wow. Where to begin. I really need some guidance right now. (Preview) Okay. So, I joined last week. So glad I did. Also went to my first f2f meeting on Saturday. My A was released from rehab on Friday, June 11. I picked him up from the airport on Saturday, June 12. He was drunk. We spent Sunday together. I told him people make mistakes, and he said he was going to make his 90 in 90...	TampaGirl	7	898	Jun 19, 2010 by abbyal
	Update (Preview) My son is still waiting on bedspace becoming available in the detox unit. Yes, due to cutbacks, there are only so many beds in one unit to cover a radius of around 200 miles where alcoholism is probably the major disease. Anyway I am powerless over that, he is top of the list and hopefully next week.All is...	Ness	7	979	Jun 18, 2010 by Ness
	i THINK THEY ARE LOVELY (Preview)	Andrea12	8	901	Jun 18, 2010 by Katy
	The lesson was in acceptance... (Preview) The new mother board is installed...obviously and the computer is computing so from my own desk I'm back in the MIP room with family. I didn't cause it, couldn't control it and couldn't cure it. I had to have other people in my life to do for me what I could not and would not do for myself. Isn't that a les...	Jerry F	13	1032	Jun 18, 2010 by Andrea12
	Bit of an update (Preview) Have just returned from hospital appointment with AH. Consultant said that the condition of AH's liver would not in itself cause the constant diarrhoea and vomiting which he has been experiencing over last 2 months or so. He thinks "there's something else going on" and wanted to admit hi...	Tattyhead	7	978	Jun 17, 2010 by Tattyhead
	Development? Or is there something I fail to see? (Preview) Hi I have been writing here on this forum many times about my alcoholic ex-girlfriend and the fact that we are not supposed to have any contact while she does the steps in AA. She called me yesterday. And unlike last time, there was no crisis this time. Last time she asked me to help her out with money for he...	Cosmos	7	838	Jun 17, 2010 by kitty
	LIFE BEGINS AGAIN WITH HOPE!!!!!!!!!!! (Preview) (((((((((((Friends)))))))))), Been a while since I have posted. So much has been going on....son finally graduated high school. Hip Hip Horrah....lol....I have started school...oh lord it is hard, but I am getting the hang of it....I am taking classes for medical billiing and Medical Coding o...	Andrea12	11	1001	Jun 17, 2010 by Karilynn
	UPDATE TRIP... (Preview) So I did as I stated... I went to my F2F on Friday :) Seen alot of faces I don't get to see at my Sunday night, that & the room was full so it was wonderful... ESH all over the place ;) Even Made a Joke at the meeting that I was thinking about finding a Way to Stick The Serenity Prayer to my Dash for the trip (thi...	Jozie	3	587	Jun 16, 2010 by Jozie
	Update :) (Preview) So it's been quite a while since I have been here and wanted to give a little update on my life... Oldest daughter remains unmarried and it looks like that is not going to happen. I got her a cell phone which has been an excellent enforcement tool and she has become much easier to live with. I have stopped...	carolinagirl	5	556	Jun 16, 2010 by maresie
	Lord's Prayer (Preview) I have been in Alan-on inconsistently since early 80's. Sometimes comfortable and sometimes not. What's the deal with the Lord's prayer as "Alan-on is not allied with any sect, DENOMINATION, political affiliation institution or organization". It was recently brought up in mee...	Clear4	8	3040	Jun 16, 2010 by Clear4
	Why am I the one who can't sleep? (Preview) Another sleepless night. I confronted my AH laast evening with the fact that I know he's drinking again, after a year and a half of sobriety. His response? Of COURSE he's drinking again, after all he's been through, who wouldn't? He feels that if I really want to help him, I will support him (not his drin...	never going back	9	1056	Jun 16, 2010 by ythannah
	book suggestions? (Preview) Can anyone recommend some books that you found particularly helpful on the subject of dealing with an alcoholic spouse? I am going to be in St. Louis tomorrow and would like to pick up some books to try to help me sort things out. I know I've heard the title "Getting Them Sober" mentioned seve...	never going back	7	1209	Jun 16, 2010 by never going back
	I just don't want to try anymore. (Preview) I feel like I have nothing left to give. Maybe that's been part of my sickness - giving too much of myself - but after this past year of focusing on myself and working on ME with my Alanon group, I just feel like I'm ready to go. I'm ready to let my AF live his own life and be free to make his own decisions. I'm...	zhotdogs99	9	1195	Jun 16, 2010 by zhotdogs99
	thanks for being here, all y'all!(SOMETHING FOR LYNDEBI) (Preview) THANKS TO EVERYONE WHO POSTS WHEN THEY ARE ABLE! I HAVE GOTTEN SO MANY GOOD RESPONSES FROM SO MANY PEOPLE. LYNDEBI: THANKS FOR MENTIONING THE JOURNALING IDEA! I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO DO THAT EVERY DAY BUT ONLY GET THE CHANCE ONCE IN A WHILE. SOMETIMES I FEEL THAT I AM TOO DEEP! I GET SO CAUGHT UP IN MY HEAD! TO...	Hoot Nanny	2	825	Jun 16, 2010 by lyndebi
	My Plan Not Working (Preview) Very frustrated here in Steeler Town and for once, it's not because of Big Ben. My wife (who just finished her 2nd month-long rehab a few weeks ago) and I had our 11th anniversary yesterday. Our plan was for her to take antabuse once a week per prescription with me to administer it every Sunday. Sh...	Shawn412	9	1013	Jun 15, 2010 by Shawn412
	I wish I could attend Al-Anon in my dreams as well. (Preview) Hi I have been feeling better and better since I came into Al-Anon. It's been ups and downs, but the trend is that it's getting better. I have even managed to be happy about little things in Life. I miss my alcoholic ex-girlfriend still. I have no contact with her and have been able to stop looking into her...	Cosmos	5	819	Jun 15, 2010 by Cosmos
	handling a relapse? (Preview) I am new here, but after reading through others experiences, it seems that maybe this is where I need to be. My husband has been an alcoholic for 40 years. Things got so far out of control 3 years ago that he finally began trying to get help. When I finally went through with my threats to leave him, he joined...	never going back	6	906	Jun 15, 2010 by Bettina
	scared of new relationships (Preview) It's a long while since I've been here. I have been by myself for a long time now, since breaking up with my abf. I am now very scared of new relationships and don't know where to start. I don't have much experience of healthy relationships and am feeling overpowered. I've been working on my self esteem a...	annmarie	4	1248	Jun 15, 2010 by Bettina
	Just venting (again!) (Preview) Just how much more can one person take? I have posted before about AH - now in end stages of alcoholism with liver and kidneys affected. He spends all time in bed - doesn't eat - just drinks and smokes. I have to marvel about how much the body can physically take. He still manages to drag himself over to loca...	Tattyhead	4	865	Jun 15, 2010 by Bettina
	It must be working... (Preview) I know i've been questioning Al anon lately with all of my craziness BUT... This is the first time in over 3 years I'm not nervous going home on a Friday night... LOVE IT!!!!	Hopeless	5	842	Jun 14, 2010 by never going back
	Need your prayers (Preview) Hi everyone, Today I got a phone call from my XAH, he can hardly speak and he is in pain, so I called the paramedics, they had to break down the door because he was too weak to unlock it. They took him to the ER and he is in ICU in critical condition, his blood count was dangerously low, and he has internal bleed...	Bettina	9	1402	Jun 14, 2010 by Bettina
	It's Really Sad/Interesting... (Preview) When someone describes their A (whether it be a drunk or dry drunk) how much a like they all are.... When I read the majority of these post I see my A in almost every one of them, it amazes me = /	Hopeless	5	847	Jun 14, 2010 by buick23
	Martyr role (Preview) when I was subsumed in the martyr role, doing far beyond any boundary for the ex A or for my roommates (I cleaned up for a long time), I had no idea how I came across to others. I felt noble, giving and responsible. Now years into recovery I can see that I alienated many many people when I gave what I didn't h...	maresie	7	970	Jun 14, 2010 by Ness
	I'm insane, I need help! (Preview) It's been a while since I posted here last time. I'm so lost. I started going to the meetings, but it's so hard for me to keep my peace everytime I talk to my alcoholic/addict husband. I think that he's having a rough time right now. He's now going back to the dark days after being sober and clean for a year...	zen78	5	843	Jun 14, 2010 by zen78
	Journal entry or post- about being less than valuable ( to him, not in my mind) (Preview) my A (live in for 7 years, due to my not wanting to get married until I feel I can accept alcoholism for the rest of my life or he gets sober) boyfriend has so many many issues that I don't know where the emotional abuse from is childhood blends with the Alcoholism from his childhood and his current alcoho...	glad	5	1037	Jun 14, 2010 by ythannah
	Thank You All.... (Preview) Your words and experiences has given my strength, I know it is time to let him own his bad choices. God Bless you all.	DreamsOver	1	649	Jun 14, 2010 by pineapple
	What is going on??? (Preview) It's been awhile since I've been online as much is going on...I finally got the courage to leave my ABF about a month ago. I am going through counseling and he is supposedly attending church, AA & is meeting regularly with his sponsor. There have been some WONDERFUL conversations. Conversati...	Love Always Hopes	5	790	Jun 14, 2010 by lyndebi
	Prayers for David (Preview) (((Family))), Let's keep our David in our thoughts and prayers this morning as he has surgery. I'm sure all will be well and our Elvis will be back with us real soon. I'll post as soon as I know anything. Thank you, Karilynn & Pipers Kitty	Karilynn	14	1016	Jun 14, 2010 by Andrea12
	All good media helps... (Preview) Just go sent an interesting article of something we can look out for on tv in the coming months... Tom MILLION-SELLING "GETTING THEM SOBER" BOOK FEATURED IN FILM by NATIONAL INSTITUTES OF MENTAL HEALTH Baltimore---- June 11, 2010 SAMHSA (national offices of U.S. substance abuse...	canadianguy	2	740	Jun 14, 2010 by Andrea12
	Today I will remember ... (Preview) The prgram works. To paraphrase the daily reading from Words to live by A Day At A Time; when the philsopher Jung was asked if he believed in God he replied "I do not believe I know" This is how I feel about AlAnon and everyone's HP, I don't have to believe I know because I see it every day. In peop...	Jennifer	3	659	Jun 14, 2010 by Andrea12
	Need To Ask A Question Please.... (Preview) My addicted son was arrested last night for resiting arrest after a fight he had with his drug friends. He is now in jail and calling me to come get him out, the bail bondsmen just called and wanted to know when I could come and pay him the bail to have my son released. I don't want to pay this or get involved w...	DreamsOver	4	935	Jun 14, 2010 by Andrea12
	Another example of how cats are like addicts! (Preview) (((Family))), Installment #2 of why cats are like addicts. For those of you who have read my post Cats are like addicts and dogs are like codependents, here's another example. True to cat/addict form: Pipers is outside focusing on one thing: Dinner, not from a can but one she can hunt. We have a gorge...	Karilynn	12	1171	Jun 14, 2010 by Andrea12
	He's at the bar, I'm trying not to freak out. (Preview) Hi all. It's been a while since I first posted, but I had a feeling I would end up coming back. Haven't (yet) made it to a face-to-face meeting, but seriously thinking about it soon. Anyway, my h is at the bar. I have no idea when he'll be home. It's almost 2am now and he has work in the morning. I'm trying hard...	wunderbar	8	850	Jun 13, 2010 by tealexis
	MONDAY A.M. MEETING (Preview) I am unable to chair the meeting Monday a.m. There is a tour of my home by the Real Estate folks and I need to vacant my home for the morning hours. Hopefully, someone will be able to step up and chair for me. Thanks, Shimo aka Jeri	shimo	0	411	Jun 13, 2010 by shimo
	Need Chair for Tonight June 13th 2010 (Preview) Sorry again i need chair again this week. Will be back to chairing sunday next week Thanks kerry (aka kerisha)	kerry5	0	504	Jun 13, 2010 by kerry5
	Why I need my meetings....part 2.......The Prodigal Returns..... (Preview) Why I need my meetings....part 2.......The Prodigal Returns.....So I was just heading to bed Wed night when I heard the kitchen door open and a hushed discussion ensue between husb & a voice I havent heard for many months, the son I love with all my heart.....I stayed calm............a miracle o...	Ness	3	1043	Jun 13, 2010 by Ness
	Origin of codependency (Preview) I have just read a long article online about codependency. I fit the pattern all too well. One thing that characterizes a codependent person is a low feeling of self. This makes me think of the time I spent in therapy last year, when I said to my therapist that I dont see myself as a person. I still find it di...	Cosmos	2	1282	Jun 13, 2010 by DreamXL
	Today Is... (Preview) my addicted son's 30th birthday. I called to let him know I have his birthday cake ready, the voice on the other end of the line with it's slurred speech, and biting remarks let me know how he plans to celebrate today. I should know better than to get my hopes up, but you still catch yourself wishing. Love...	DreamsOver	4	743	Jun 13, 2010 by adonaisgirl
	New Here:Step son Just out of Jail and Home. (Preview) My steps son is just out of Jail and the drug dealers and calling him already. I tell him not to get back in the same routine. But I dont think he hears me.	Voyger52	2	1022	Jun 13, 2010 by Bettina
	Alone (Preview) My A called and said he didn't think he should drive home, I am thankful for that so many times he did drive when he shouldn't. We had a fight this week (he was sober) and of course it was mostly about what I had to change that made him stressed out etc. but also about how I get no emotional support from him, he...	Holly09	1	714	Jun 13, 2010 by Bettina
	JUST A QUICK ONE! (Preview) I JUST WANTED TO UPDATE MY CURRENT SITUATION WITH GETTING MY BR CONSULTATION & EVERYTHING THAT IS GOING THUS FAR! I AM SO NERVOUS & SCARED TO DO IT! IT IS A LONG DRAWN OUT RECOVERY! I WILL HAVE TO REALLY CONSIDER IT MORE BEFORE I DO IT! IT IS 7,600 DOLLARS BUT MY MOM IS TAKING CARE OF IT SO THAT ISN'T A...	Hoot Nanny	1	606	Jun 12, 2010 by Jennifer
	Just for this Moment.... (Preview) Well I'm still on my Roller Coaster, for sure... But Today is a beautiful Day So trying to find the brighter side of things... Little "Belly Nervous" about this weekend tho... many that know me know that my Neice & Nephew moved FAR From me, and have been gone since last July.... So I have...	Jozie	4	1001	Jun 12, 2010 by Jozie
	New Here. Husband will be home tomorrow from in-patient program. Sigh. (Preview) Hi all, I've been perusing the site and you all seem like a very nice group of people. I hope you don't mind me joining in. My husband comes home tomorrow after 4 weeks in a detox/rehab program. I have read lots about detaching, etc., but am still just so resentful. 6 weeks ago (even before he went into the p...	TampaGirl	12	1860	Jun 11, 2010 by TampaGirl
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.