The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Can anyone recommend some books that you found particularly helpful on the subject of dealing with an alcoholic spouse? I am going to be in St. Louis tomorrow and would like to pick up some books to try to help me sort things out. I know I've heard the title "Getting Them Sober" mentioned several times here, but was wondering if any of you could recommend some others as well. Thanks so much.
"The secret of life is enjoying the passage of time."
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"The secret of life is enjoying the passage of time."
Al-Anon How it Works has everything u need to know about alcoholism and how it has affected your life , and how to recover from it . and our odat daily reader One day at a time
Under the Influence, by Dr James Millam answered a lot of my questions about the disease of alcoholism, and more, and changed a lot of perspectives and attitudes
I agree Ness, "Under the influence" is a really great book. It really straightens out the myths of alcoholism, everyone that has a spouse or family member with this disease should read this book.
Aloha Never...make sure to look into the used books stores cause you can get some great deals and therefore more books that will fulfill your need for awareness.
The Al-Anon Books were written from the perspectives of the family, friends and associates of alcoholic which is your prespective. One Day at a Time in Al-Anon, Hope for today, Courage to Change, As we understand, Dilema of an Alcoholic Marriage, and more. You can contact AFGWSO.org and click on to publications and get the list. What Abby and the others have also mentioned is also very helpful. Under the Influence was one of my college texts.
Going to a face to face meeting anywhere they are at which is just about every where as the program is in like hundreds of countries (you are not alone and this is a global epidemic) will introduce you to the literature which includes many many pamphlets that will relate to your need.
If you keep and open mind you will find help. Yours in love and service. (((((hugs)))))
My favorites. The MerrygoRound of Denial pamphlet was in my back pocket for about 2 years straight, went thru quite a few of them *laugh*
"The Addictive Personality: understanding the addictive process and compulsive behavior" by Craig Nakken, publ Hazelden. This is a personal favorite, the book that finally got the whole rountine of my xAh's addiction cycle thru to me. In the process made me see my part in the cycle too.
"The Language of Letting Go" by Melody Beattie, publ Hazelden. I keep revisiting and find something to think and/or work on each time.
"Choosing Happiness: The art of living unconditionally" by Veronica Ray, publ Hazelden. Another I tend to pick up alot and find helpful.
Those are my favorites and most tattered ones, along with the already mentioned "AlAnon How it Works"
I really think for me that books are only part of the solution. I know I've tried in the past to just figure it all out on my own by reading some good books, but unless I'm actively discussing and working what I'm reading, all it is, is just a bunch of information to file away in my head. I really have to "use" it to make it worthwhile. Al-Anon meetings help me to practice using and discussing what I read.
I'm going to throw a completely odd one out there - Eckhart Tolle's "A New Earth" was a great book for me, because it really got me to see just how crazy I can make myself. A big part of my own illness is living in the past or trying desperately to predict the future. Neither of which do me any good. The book, along with Al-Anon, really opened my eyes to the possibility of accepting what just "IS" in my life without assigning names, reasons, descriptions or judgements to things. I absolutely LOVE that book. It's a hard one for some to grasp, though. I honestly feel a person has to be in the right "place" in their life to really accept what the book has to offer. I downloaded all the webcasts from when he was a guest on Oprah, and they're amazing, too. I'd like to read the book again, actually.
It's not CAL (Al-Anon "Conference Approved Literature"), but I still think it fits right in with a lot of Al-Anon philosophies.
Thanks so much for all the great ideas. I picked up "Getting Them Sober" and "Marriage on the Rocks". So far, 'M on the R' has been spot-on to my situation. I keep reading it and thinking, that's ME he's talking about!! I have put all of your suggestions on my Kindle "Wish List" and will start working my way through them. (Some are not available and those I will get on my next trip to the bookstore. I realize that simply reading about the problem is not going to be enough. I am planning on going to my first F2F tomorrow. But, reading has always been a great comfort to me, and it's something productive I can do on those frequent sleepless nights.
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"The secret of life is enjoying the passage of time."