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What's your favorite slogan & why?
(Preview)
Slogans:One of my faves is One Day at a Time-I too often am inclined to get way ahead of myself & project past experiences onto possible future outcomes. I believe it is a way of self protection that worked in the past, but is no longer serving me. When I go to a meeting and hear or pick up the literature...
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luv123
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8
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770
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I cant and wont live this way does it make me a bad person
(Preview)
I have relized that my husband needs to do this alone. And i am willing to stand by his side though his iop program he has 2 more weeks left, but when that is over and he is done i am thinking of making him choose. Either he goes down the new path with me and his kids and there is marriage counceling or he can choo...
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HAguirre
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6
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468
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am i normal
(Preview)
ive met a guy 2 weeks ago didnt know him from adam,we went out and then he called me everyday 2x a day and then we went out or spent the day together the next weekend,now im falling for him,i think im crazy,i didnt expect that to happpen so quick scares me i dont think his feelings for me r the same he says he do...
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chinup
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4
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493
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what do I say
(Preview)
I have had an alki step father. I am a recovering alki myself. Whats got me twisted up is a loved ones other addiction though. When he talks about his plans and schemes how he is going to control this addiction. What do I say back? Oh thats great? I dont want to say that is great. I want to yell GO TO A DAMN 12 St...
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Slugcat
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5
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580
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Tired of Enabler's
(Preview)
After coming home from dropping my AH off at jail for the next two nights, one of 19 more from his last DUI, my telephone rang, it was one of his friends that has been sober for 6 years. This is someone who I thought I could count on to help me talk some sense into my AH but has turned out to be nothing more than an...
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michellelong
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6
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485
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Hello
(Preview)
My life is out of control, a friend I respect said I should try al-anon... I went to a local meeting on a day I got sent home from work, it was okay I guess. Most of the people were WAY older than me and I felt a little singled out. There are not any local meetings in my area that are outside of my work hours.There...
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MariaM
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13
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595
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A share
(Preview)
I noticed that there seems to be a theme on anger recently, .. lol .. not that I haven't had my share of that emotion recently. It keeps creeping in on me and I have to remember what is mine, his and ours together .. lol. Last week I heard a great quote, I swear I thought I had read it here on the boards I know i...
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Pushka
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2
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319
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Thoughts on Enabling and Anger
(Preview)
When I starting reading Alanon literature I couldn't really get a grasp on what enabling was and separating it from compassion. I was helped by many and now I can boil it down to one sentence. "Do not do for others what they can and should do for themselves" This helped me and then it wasn't so c...
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oldergal
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3
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752
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Feeling the need to share again...and again...
(Preview)
I'm sorry to keep venting but I am hoping this is what the board is for. I am not having a good day like I hoped for and I don't understand why! As I have said in a previous post, my AH is in jail serving the third of 22 weekends from a DUI back in January. He comes home at 6PM tomorrow. He calls me but sounds distan...
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michellelong
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3
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355
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I don't know what to do.
(Preview)
I am new to this forum. I have an alcoholic mother, she got sober about 11 years ago as the result of being admitted to the hospital after a bad fall and being diagnosed with cirrhosis of the liver. It took her about a month to fully detox and then another month in physical therapy to learn how to walk again....
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Mylife
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5
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480
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Just random thoughts
(Preview)
Hi all, I haven't posted in a while..
I am feeling a little down the last few days and need to vent.
I feel like my life is over. Don't mean that as dramatically as it sounds, ie I am dying, but just the fun and adventure and good times for me are done. Right now my entire goal and focus is on my kids, that they...
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tweety23
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3
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352
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Standing still Still drowning
(Preview)
Is it normal to feel like nothing is happening nothing is moving forward. i have the book for alanon i admit my life is unmanigable i admit i am powerless i have gave it to god even though it still hurts I dont understand how or where i am supose to do now. How come i'm not feeling better what do i do with the bo...
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HAguirre
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2
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443
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Depressed in NC
(Preview)
I'm brand new to the group, been looking for something like this for a long time. I have been married to an alcoholic/drug abuser for 6 years. The longest he has gone without anything is 11 months. I have had 2-5 month periods of happiness as well but it never lasts. I am to the point where I never know if he i...
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michellelong
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10
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497
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Letting go
(Preview)
An alcoholic who lived next to me has finally been evicted. He had a small dog who I was feeding by the time he left. If I had his phone number I'd probably still be feeding him. I detached a great deal from him over the year he lived next to me. Nevertheless his chaos, constant crises and complete and tota...
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maresie
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6
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478
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Tradition 7 in dealing with my kids
(Preview)
Tradition 7 self supporting-declining outside contributions I remember reading a nice forum article from way back in the 80's. It dilineated ways we could apply tradtions to our home and family life. This tradition was especially helpful to me while I was learning to apply the Al-anon principl...
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luv123
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3
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960
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The Science of Addiction
(Preview)
http://www.statesman.com/opinion/insight/texas-expert-addiction-science-has-taken-giant-steps-1642154.html
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ditto
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5
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545
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Balancing Act
(Preview)
Hi gang.... just wanted to re-post this today, about the importance of "balance" in our lives.... even with respect to recovery stuff vs. other stuff - whether it is dealing with our A's specifically, or life in general.... For me, I had a tendency to try and find "too much recover...
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canadianguy
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11
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779
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The Blue Balloon
(Preview)
I remember when I first came to recognize that Alcohol was possibly, at least part of the problem in my marriage. I was so desperate to learn what was wrong with my family, wrong with me and wrong in general. I wanted to fix it, understand it and get as far away from what was happening as I could. I had trie...
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lacewing
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7
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700
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When your child is your A
(Preview)
Would you who have a child who is A please share about this? Of course I appreciate everyones shares too. My friend is struggling. Xeno you are so right, and you reminded me of things thank you My friend from High school I have always called my brother came over very upset. His darn son who is around 23, got...
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Debilyn
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9
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1447
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in the same boat!
(Preview)
I am so glad to be in the same boat w/ you all! The reason: we are not all drowning! We can all be grateful that we have the support we need right here! I have so much hope today that I never thought possible. I mention this quite often lately because I have finally found it & hope you will all too! After so m...
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Hoot Nanny
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3
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408
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New Board Moderator
(Preview)
Really pleased to announce that we have a new Board Moderator, effective immediately..... RLC (Rodney) has agreed to become a Moderator, and I am thrilled to have the help. He has been a valuable member of our family for a long time on MIP, and will be a valuable addition to our group. When I look at t...
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canadianguy
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13
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685
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Hurt, confused and scared...(long)
(Preview)
A couple months ago my A went into a clinic for detox, they told him he would have died if he continued to try to do it on his own. Up until Thursday night, he was sober 8 weeks. Those 8 weeks were fantastic, stress free, happy times. He's the best man I've ever met when he's sober. Because of a DUI in December,...
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MAR2011
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5
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464
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New and dont know what to do?
(Preview)
I am new to this whole life style. My husband has just started an IOP program and he is sober now for over 30 days. I am proud of him but i feel like i am left in the dust. I am still trying to see where i belong and what i do to fix me. I have been reading alot about codependency and slowly realizing that is me, beca...
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HAguirre
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6
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487
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getting old!
(Preview)
I am getting old even though most people think 45 is young! Yeah, tomorrow is my birthday. I am looking forward to celebrating like I always do! Today was the start of my partying! I hope I don't get a hangover--not from drinking but from all the excitement! I just got back from lunch w/a dear friend; bles...
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Hoot Nanny
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6
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493
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So mad I could spit nails! (vent)
(Preview)
Just received a call from ABF. Mind you, I AM at work.... the only one of the two of us that is currently employed.... He got in touch with his lawyer.... the Solicitor wants to throw the book at him really hard... so here comes the blame game again... 24 week Drug/Alcohol program... 18 week family vi...
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ELEKTRAWMN
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11
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595
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Turning it Over to HP - advice needed
(Preview)
Hi Everyone, Lately throughout my day I have noticed that my mind starts going to deep dark places. I start to worry about things related to my AW in recovery, family, future, past, etc. Essentially all of these worries have already been handed over to my HP through working the steps (currently on s...
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surfingmaestro
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7
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392
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Great Thoughts for the Day
(Preview)
Written by Andy Rooney, a man who has the gift of saying so much with so few words. learn..... That the best classroom in the world is at the feet of an elderly person. .... That when you're in love, it shows. .... That just one person saying , 'You've made my day!'will make your day. Learn.......
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oldergal
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8
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3730
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Been away for awhile :((
(Preview)
Recently I started to a alonon meeting again-and YES i have a sponsor, which I am very happy about. My youngest son (36) got a DUI about 2 months ago-and I know I sure needed help again. I grew up with a "A" brother-now he is addicted to Oxcy...:(anyhooow I have 3 adult sons 36,37 and 38 and I di...
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meagain
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2
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362
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I need to vent, a bit OT
(Preview)
I know that many of you are used to living with someone who is mired in their own problems, addictions, or selfishness so that's why I'm posting. Lately, I have been very down in regards to my marriage. My dh is looking for a new job and he's completely obsessed with his problems at work. The issue is th...
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ilovedogs
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12
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467
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I don't have enough time by myself.
(Preview)
Today I realized it is my day off. I have someone else covering for me and it was planned a while ago. I forgot about it. I sit here today thinking, what should I do? I didn't have a clue. I was fighting to figure something out and couldn't think of anything. I realized today that I nurture myself in the w...
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clep
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5
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448
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ex friend
(Preview)
I know there is no point even thinking about this, since it is over and done, and doesn't even matter to begin with. However, any time I am rejected I always wonder if it could have been my fault, or if they rejected me because I am worthless, etc. I was friends with Luna for over 10 years. We met in a 12 step gr...
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ifa
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8
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580
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Private Counseling vs Al-Anon
(Preview)
Hi All, In some of my posts, I mention that I had gone through many years of counseling and that I still had a lot of emotional baggage regarding my marriage. My baggage has been significantly reduced since attending meetings for the past 5 months. I attribute this "weight" loss to the mem...
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GailMichelle
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26
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2994
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Down
(Preview)
I am grateful for this message board. I don't feel I have many trusted places to turn at the moment (whether real or perceived). I'm glad that I feel grateful for anything right now. My AH was distant and seemingly angry yesterday. I respected that he didn't want to talk about it, but struggled with h...
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KLotus
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8
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675
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Today's reminder: ODAAT 7/20 and December 7
(Preview)
I may or may not be able to post this in full so I will post just a couple excerpts, but its something I feel that I am being led to share: From ODAAT in alanon July 20 pp202 "Everytime I catch myself trying to figure out other people's motives, I'll stop and ask myself: "What did I say or do that pr...
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youfoundme
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3
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457
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Not Again!
(Preview)
I haven't been on here for a while. I have been out trying to live my life and not think about my ABF. The last time I spoke to him was the end of May, he said that I was stalking him and that I was crazy. Then two seconds later he said when I get too close he has to run for a while and he feels like he is losing God....
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parfait624
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10
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526
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Drowning
(Preview)
Two weeks ago I lost my job. No severance, and my former employer is going to fight my unemployment claim. I have been considering leaving my AH. Unfortunately, these events will make that impossible. As any one of us could have predicted, his drinking is escalating. I have reason to believe tha...
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stephaniej
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5
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396
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The Moostiif Says I'm Beautiful
(Preview)
OK yes me and the moostiff have been cooped up inside with the air conditioning for a few days now so granted his actions and my thoughts are getting a bit goofy ... but ... This morning every time my music cycle has turned to a specific song he starts barking and dancing around the house. Since it seems he h...
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Jennifer
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3
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632
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Your perspective?
(Preview)
Last night at my home group meeting, I was talking after the meeting with my alanon friend and a gentleman. The man is a self proclaimed double winner, that white knuckled it for 23 years before he came to AA and Alanon which he says makes it easier to not drink (7 years ago he came to the meetings). He was...
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youfoundme
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12
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565
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Did everything wrong
(Preview)
Ok so I pushed my spouse to make an appt. with the CASAC, I asked her if she made a 2nd one, I want her to change, I need our marriage to change, and I know all this thinking is wrong, wrong, wrong. I need a brain tune-up. I know the Serenity Prayer. I know I can only change myself. I still want her to change ...
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Lyne
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6
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524
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kicked out
(Preview)
My mom just kicked my alcoholic dad out of the house. He went to rehab about 2 months ago, but relapsed, and so she kept her word. My question is - do I contact him to talk about it? Let him feel alone for awhile so (hopefully) he realizes the consequences? This sucks...he just visited me, and seemed to be do...
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hoyasfan123
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8
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573
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hurt hurt hurt
(Preview)
If my qualifier doesn't call me after a certain amount of time -- say 12 hours -- I start to worry that he never will. Then I get a feeling of intense sorrow. If I try calling him and he doesn't answer, it gets worse and worse. I wonder if this is simply because I love him and we don't live together? Or does it me...
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ifa
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15
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626
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update 3rd face to face al anon meeting zambia,africa and advice requested
(Preview)
hi all just an update on 3rd al anon face to face meeting i lusaka, zambia, africa. attendance was back up to 4 with one new person which was great.its not so scary taking the meetings as it was 2 meetings ago so thats also nice.its going great and i am truly grateful. had a bit of a dilemma 2 days before thoug...
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Megthompson
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8
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774
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Advice and support needed ASAP !
(Preview)
Hi everyone, I am new to this so hopefully this posts right. Anyway, I am feeling really depressed lately, while at the same time I am also very relieved. It is a kind of bitter sweet feeling. My boyfriend of 3 years, who I have been trying to help with his alcohol addiction ever since I discovered his prob...
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alanonnewbie
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6
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541
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zzzzzz's
(Preview)
Good morning yall, I don't know about you guys but last night when I went to sleep, someone took my peaceful brain and substituted squirrel cage thinking in there. I have no idea what I was dreaming of, but it sure feel like there was a lot of activity going on. The committee in my head apparently had a gr...
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tommyecat
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10
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516
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Officially divorced as of this morning!
(Preview)
I haven't had a good sob yet, but I feel it coming on. I felt like laughing and crying at the same time walking out of the courthouse. It all feels so bittersweet right now after 15 years of my exAH being a main part of my life. I have been counting down since I filed in February and now it came to pass. I even sho...
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flopadopilus
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12
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724
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Irrational Alcoholic & Me Too !! Grr
(Preview)
there's a sticker i read recently that says, "never listen to the things you tell yourself when you're hungry, angry, lonely, tired, etc.," Great sticker, but tonight it's pretty hard. Trying to keep the focus on me and Not the alcoholic but failing miserably. Keep being the key word .. I...
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MeTwo2
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7
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4039
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recovery on TV
(Preview)
I don't know what y'all think but I am happy when recovery is mentioned on TV. I find it very refreshing! I was watching a show yesterday(let it be nameless) that mentioned AA more than once & that the gal is in recovery from alcohol/drug addiction--anyhow, she took her father to an AA meeting &...
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Hoot Nanny
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4
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610
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How long does Detox take?
(Preview)
My AH was brought, by ambulance into the hospital. He had been drinking and taking ambien...he was hallucinating and raving. Two days later he is still not rational but he is ranting the wants to go home. We don't live together anymore he lives by himself...Can they release him? He wont go into treatme...
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alexmaui
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6
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493
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Snooping
(Preview)
Hi, everybody.. A few minutes ago I put the word 'snooping' in this board's search engine, and I was amazed at how enlightening it was for me to read the posts. It was as if people were channeling me and what I was feeling and doing. To make a long story short, I'd lately been compulsively snooping on m...
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AnnieMar
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18
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932
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My Lead :)
(Preview)
Live & Let Live! For me, it has taking these Last 2+ years to really HEAR what this Says to me! Because I thought I was LIVING in the existence of my life, and here I come to find out that I was Only Making Waves! It says in my Book that if I am Living, I need be living Fully, richly, & happily to fulfi...
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Jozie
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2
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1202
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OT-help for insomnia?
(Preview)
It's 5 am here and I've been awake since 3 am. This has been going on for over a week now. I'm tired all day but still have trouble sleeping at night. When I do manage to fall asleep I'm awake again 2 or 3 hours later and can't get back to sleep. I think that it is partly because of the new living arrangement with...
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pineapple
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12
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773
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Responsibility
(Preview)
So I've done a lot of thinking out loud, and last night was a major no sleep zone for me. I know I have to identify what my issue is before I can shut my brain off for the night. After many months of good sleep, it didn't work out so well the past week. I will say so far as I plan on totally sleeping tonight! Da...
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Pushka
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6
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652
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disease on the attack again, again again
(Preview)
I HATE ALCOHOLISM. sorry my prtner is starting to slip on a regular basis agin after 9 months sobriety it was six months last time. He has done six months rehab, 3 months dry house and now he is drinking on and off and all the crap is starting. I just can not be hurt anymore. I am getting better I m starting...
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Tracy
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8
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580
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In need of a positive quote
(Preview)
My friend is at 46 days sober and she is struggling today, anyone got a great quote i can send her to help with positivity?
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countrygirl14437
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8
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636
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Mean and bitter people and stuff
(Preview)
I know why but it is so awful. I went on a discussion list.CL in the disabilities one. All I asked was how are you treated with your service dog. OMGOSH it was horrible! I could not believe how mean, ignorant, rude they were! It was like they were looking for a kitten to kick! Well geez just saying that made m...
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Debilyn
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7
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650
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Facing a layoff isn't easy
(Preview)
Hello to all: I am believing in my HP to open doors for a new job. It has been a bit challenging emotionally these past days. Whew! I did not expect to feel so much emotional pain. I've been through this road before. Just wanted to share and release it. Hopefully I feel better soon. It just hurts so much. Ha...
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hawaiilover
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7
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409
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Stress management
(Preview)
This popped up in my email this morning.....hope you like it too ....................................................... A young lady confidently walked around the room while leading and explaining stress management to an audience; with a raised glass of water, and everyone knew she was go...
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Ness
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11
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473
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need to vent,sick n tired of being used by family
(Preview)
my sister,the only one out of 6 of us started seaking to me agin,couldnt pour sugar on her quick enough that it would melt for over a yr now ,well i allowed her to have yardsales in my yard only for her to run off leavening me with the mess and all the stuff that didnt sale so i called her sevearal times to get it...
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chinup
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4
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473
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My fault too?
(Preview)
Hello all - I have a story to relate and hopefully some of you will see the humor I do. For 9 months now AH and I have been separated and every time he gets mad at me (with increasing frequency) everything bad in his life is my fault. It's like he's got a tape recorder set on a loop replaying the same ole same ole...
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likemyheart
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11
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661
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Need a hug
(Preview)
I feel kind of sad today, I guess meloncholly(spelling?) really. I feel like a need a hug. Does that make sense? LOL... I talked to my alanon friend and I think this week I am going to ask her to sponsor me. I will see her Wednesday. I feel it should be done in person and not over the phone. I guess I am s...
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youfoundme
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13
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613
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