Hugs,

I go with the your house your rules motto. It's going to be something you and your husband are going to have to come to an agreement on. I don't know how you "make" someone understand alcohol is alcohol. I've heard it all this past year. If it's beer it doesn't really count, if it's wine it doesn't really count, if it's beer and you are having pizza it's ok (I did actually start laughing when that was said). After all an addict drinks every day and they drink hard liquor the other stuff isn't that bad. He's blowing off steam, he works hard he should be able to have a beer after all it's just a beer (no it's a 3 24oz and a 6 pack like you said .. lol who's counting?) It's all rationalization for an irrational situation. I've wanted to say well would it count if he wore a pink tutu and was spinning down the street while drinking a glass of wine? At what point does it count? After the first 4 DUI's, after someone gets killed, after going to jail to sober up, after loosing 4 jobs? I don't know when does it count?

My house rule is my AH can't drink at home. I have a list of rationalizations for why I feel that way .. lol .. you know what, no one else has to live my life. My kids come first and my husband drinking completely undermines their safety, because I feel unsafe around people who are in extreme altered states of minds. We live in extremes there is no moderation, all or nothing should be the motto over our door or on our welcome mat .. lol. In my case my AH recognizes why I feel that way and for whatever reason he has agreed not to drink in the house. To the best of my knowledge has not had anything to drink since last Oct, I'm trying to remember to breathe when he starts driving again.

You sure aren't alone in wondering these questions. Thank you so much for your share :) Hugs again P :)