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Haven't been on in a while, feeling overwhelmed
(Preview)
I think I have too much on my plate. AH and I are planning on buying a new home as our home will need about $30K of work soon because of it's age and because of HOA guidelines about exterior paint colors, etc. We figured we'd be better off just putting the money into a newer neighborhood and newer home. I'v...
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ilovedogs
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6
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419
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10th year anniversary
(Preview)
I'm in a funk. So far this year I've been able to keep it together and even help others who have troublesome marriages. This week it's my 10th year anniversary, and my heart is on the floor. He wanted to go out to dinner and a movie, but I don't want to be around him at all. He went to Target and brought a watch...
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gladysg
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7
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452
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Time Frame
(Preview)
Day 4 of detox/rehab. Anybody know when the light at the end of the tunnel will be visable? So far he's gone through all of the emotions, along with denial, deal making, saying it's back pain causing the physical symptoms NOT withdrawal, that he's going to leave today, tomorrow, next week...etc. Than...
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PauliePaulie
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9
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731
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Though I know it has to be, it hurts
(Preview)
My ex just left with a truck load of his stuff, about 75% of it. While he was here his phone rang with "my" ringer (the archies singing sugar sugar) he tried to tell me that it was a guy friend of his - he still thinks of me as that gullible? Yeah, that one hurts. I'm sitting here trying to recover my...
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likemyheart
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7
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694
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How do you kick someone out that has nowhere to go, no job, no money, no car...?
(Preview)
I've been involved with "B" for almost 6 years. He's been in detox and hospitalized too many times to count. Usually without a job, verbally abusive when he's drunk (daily), never keeps his promises. I'm ready to move on. Problem is we live together and as the headline says, he has nowhere t...
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nancie2248
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21
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8691
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What Does Working It Mean to Me
(Preview)
Reading Jerry's posting on the statement "It Works if you Work It"started me thinking What does "Working It " mean to me? I came up with the basic tools that I have developed over the years that have become my routine practice that will keep me sane and my program fresh Here is w...
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hotrod
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6
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625
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in a good place today
(Preview)
HI guys Well... after a couple of weeks of getting back on the horse.... I am in a good place today. I think one of the catalysts is that the 'real' dope that was in the friends car in our driveway, drove out yesterday. I have not asked if he kept any, I have not said anything about it. I had a straight husba...
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Lindaoakford
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4
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436
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Success Stories Anyone?
(Preview)
Have been married to my AH for almost 8 years, only in the last 2 did I become aware of his addictions, and only in the last 6 months have I been in involved in Alanon. It has been transforming and lifesaving for me. Things have improved with my AH, he goes to AA meetings, although has not committed to the pro...
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surfgirl123
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10
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3635
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Disappointed .. (vent)
(Preview)
Arrgghhh .. I'm trying to work through this and I'm more mad at myself, still highly disappointed in my AH. I went to the dang hardware store looking for that loaf of bread and son of a gun they were sold out! Grrr!! When push comes to shove I've done it to myself with this situation. I expected my AH to...
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Pushka
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8
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671
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Psychotic Depression
(Preview)
I used to come to this board a lot. My AH is not an admitted A. He blames his alcoholism on the long-term prescribed use of a benzodiazipine. He also cold-turkeyed off Effexor. Some of you might remember my posts about a year ago. We had separated, but I let him return after he quit those drugs, b/c I was det...
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looking_for_peace
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6
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462
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Change
(Preview)
A year ago, I never thought I'd be posting something on this forum. In fact, I didn't know that alanon existed. But that would have been just before meeting what I thought was the man of my dreams. At first it was funny. He would get drunk and do silly things and we'd tear it up on the dance floor. We fel...
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SMT
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7
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516
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is it a choice once in AA
(Preview)
I am really confused, I have been seeing acousellor ad she seems really good at getting me to come out of denial and face reality. She says she has worked with a cliet who was in AA so has some knowledge of alcoholism. My partner has been in aa for over two years. slipping and sliding. He was sober 6 months b...
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Tracy
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11
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815
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It's Working!
(Preview)
Today, I took our Little Lucky, the kitten we adopted, to the vet's for his first series of shots. (He wasn't too happy.) But I sure was! The assistant, who has never commented on my demeanor in the past, stated that I seemed "more relaxed." That to me is a sign that it's working! Big smile ...
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GailMichelle
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9
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376
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Feeling tired of it all today.
(Preview)
Some days are better than others. Today is not a good day for me. I haven't gotten to meetings in a couple of weeks which isn't helping. I am physically and mentally exhausted. I mean really exhausted!!! I home school our son, Pay the bills and manage all money Clean the house Parent alone Do the taxe...
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clep
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13
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543
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New here
(Preview)
The drinker in my life is my mother. I have only recently come across alanon and I am a bit apprehensive to attend a meeting. Although the concept sounds really helpful. My mum has always enjoyed going to pubs and socialising and her and her now husband even made a career out of running different pubs for...
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lovelybertha
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7
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382
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Been on the verge of a panic attack all day
(Preview)
Trying to deal with anger the last few days and it's been rough. Been here alone at the house all day and trying to clean in order to keep from thinking. Hasn't been working very well, and now I'm having an auto-immune flareup so I'm in a lot of pain and can't keep doing chores. Mom seems to be staying sobe...
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scholarlydragon
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4
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556
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This works when you work it....
(Preview)
Aloha Family and I'm just delighted!! We had 4 newcomers at this mornings meeting and listening to their shares I became grateful for the time and the lessons and the practices and meetings and literature and the membership and of course my HP all of who have showed up in my life since I first got into A...
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Jerry F
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6
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334
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only positive things--at least I will try!
(Preview)
As I sit here, I think I can think of only positive things to share w/ you. The peace of the program is coming over me a little at a time. I am just happy that I can find peace. I love that when we work the program, Peace comes to us. I guess the main topic of my share is finding peace. It is so good to know that after...
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Hoot Nanny
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2
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417
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New Group Meeting
(Preview)
Hi, After joining al-anon 2yrs ago, I finally feel ready to open a new meeting in the area I live. We live ruraly out here in Australia, on the outskirts of a little place. There's a hall here that is rarely used, so I've spoke to the people about using it. They seem very happy to have the group started up...
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Tracey C
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5
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320
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still grateful!
(Preview)
No matter what happens, where I go or where I end up, I will always & I mean always be grateful for where I am! I can't do anything w/o the help of my HP & that is where gratitude comes from. Yeah, maybe I have struggled in the last couple of days but I can't forget that I have so much to be grateful for. I...
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Hoot Nanny
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2
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299
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newby
(Preview)
Hi...I attended my first F2F meeting on Friday and am not sure if I'm going to be going again. It was a good meeting, but my A is VERY angry about it. He is very much steeped in denial about his problem drinking and today said that I should get a lawyer; that since I've taken this step, which he thinks is comp...
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luvsapd
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10
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825
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PLEASE HELP ME
(Preview)
I am having a real hard time right now in my life. Gosh doesn't it seem like that all the time for me? It does. I'm getting panic attacks because I'm taking a real hard math class at a community college and I need to pass it to be able to transfer to a university. PLEASE HELP me. I have found a tutor but I ca...
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ineedhelpnow
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8
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573
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Don't know what to do, I think I lost my son to drugs again
(Preview)
My son just got out of treatment 2 weeks ago went to his graduation things seemed good but today he doesn't answer any calls . He is in a 3/4 home I really feel since he has not replied to any of my calls he is using again, I just don't think I can go thru this again.
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ISMP
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3
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549
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New and asking for ESH (long, sorry)
(Preview)
Hello and thank you all first of all for being here, I have been lurking for about a year and only set up an account very recently. Background - I am 39 and have been with my A for 10 years, married for the past 2. I married him because we both wanted to start a family (didn't happen although ttc for 2 years). ...
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Calyx
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6
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623
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Got a taste of reality
(Preview)
Well as some of you know my AH went AWOL last Friday. Although he text me here and there I didn't actually see him again until Monday night. He wanted to come home in the late afternoon and I told him he couldn't until he went to an AA or NA meeting that night. He did so I brought him home after and told him I coul...
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Jonesy0505
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8
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468
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flopidopulus & others .. the dark
(Preview)
i posted an entry about a week ago on my A and got some great words of wisdom in response ... Flopidopolus (spelling ? sorry can't see other page) you typed something that made me think while sharing about your A .. " My self esteem took a much needed boost and the more energy I put into me, the more I ha...
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MeTwo2
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3
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590
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Books for ACOA (Adult Children of Alcoholics)
(closed)
(Preview)
I have read so many great Al-anon books and as much as I loved "Getting Them Sober" by Toby Rice Drews and "Codependent No More" by Melody Beattie and I read my daily readers too. I think "Perfect Daughters" by Robert J. Ackerman Ph.D. hit me just as hard if not harder....
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flopadopilus
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6
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2568
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A tiny slip ..
(Preview)
So I had a little slip last night. My AH who has taken no interest in what I do or don't do in 13 years has decided he doesn't like those rules which is fine. I need time to adjust. Well, I've always been an open book and I'm not a closed book I just choose not to be always 100% open, I'm always transparent. I...
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Pushka
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5
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531
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My one year anniversary
(Preview)
I was goofing off at work here just before heading home, reading some posts here on MIP. I was realizing that it's probably been close to a year since I first came here...so I thought--hmm, I should check and see when my first post was. Well, it was exactly one year ago today. I find it so odd that I just happ...
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usedtobeanyer
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10
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514
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Prayer Request
(Preview)
I believe wholeheartedly in the power of prayer and I and my family needs yours now. My 78 year old mother feel today and my 14 yr old son found her after school....I called the ambulance and they took her to the hospital where she was quickly admitted.... As of right now....her kidneys aren't working pr...
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shellyj123
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11
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553
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Little things... Little Things... Little Things...
(Preview)
I Can Honestly Say, I don't Remember a Time I was this Tired HP Has Sure Been Steppin Up for Me Here Lately, and Thank Goodness, because if not the Insanity would have placed me in the Rubber Room By Now! ... ;0) But I'm Still Standing... I have Spent 9 days out of the Last 13, at 4-6 Hours a Night in a Hospit...
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Jozie
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4
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356
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Keep coming back ..
(Preview)
So last nights meeting is a meeting I kind of hit and miss from week to week. It really depends on what I need. I have a difficult time missing Simon Baker .. lol .. on the show The Mentalist. Last night was the open AA boy do I love those. I enjoy the group. I don't know if I have shared this before, I've ha...
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Pushka
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2
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466
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meeting opener / reading mistakes
(Preview)
Over the years I have attended many face to face meetings of both AA and Alanon and had great pleasure when the occasional reading mistake occurs. I myself love laughter as I feel it is healing to the soul. I have kept many notebooks over the years of the wit and wisdom I have found in the rooms of recove...
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tommyecat
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5
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609
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falling down, and climbing back out
(Preview)
I struggle with some major depression issues that stem from my childhood traumas and other things that I allowed to happen to me as an adult. I have PTSD, ADHD, and General Anxiety disorder with Panic attacks that occur for no reason at all. The last few days I have felt terrible inside. My mind is sic...
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youfoundme
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11
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552
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The Four M's
(Preview)
Yesterday I had replied to a post citing the 4 M's in Alanon that were particularly meaningful to me when I was new. They are: Managing Manipulating Mothering Matyrdom I couldn't remember which book that I read it from. Finally I discovered the 4 M's are from our book Paths to Recovery on PP 40. In grat...
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tommyecat
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8
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2253
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am I ready to face the truth??
(Preview)
Feeling down this morning so prayed and prayed and read to put positive thoughts into my mind. I was feeling better focusing on me my day. I bumped into my ABF,s sister and cousin they told me stuff he has been doing, stole off his mum again, in parties with other girls, supposed to of stole a purse of some...
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Tracy
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9
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546
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Long, difficult, and scary road
(Preview)
Hi all -- I have just filed for divorce from my husband of 29 years, an A. We have been separated a year, and for the most part our separation has been amicable. I am feeling so scared and so alone. I have shouldered ALL the responsibility -- for the house (250K) for all the bills etc as he has been unemp...
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rehprof
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10
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659
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My mom does not get it
(Preview)
Im Susan, My mother is always complaining about my sisters and myself. We are not the problem. She is drinking and making us the victim. She secretely drinks, and thinks that because we are younger, WE must be the problem. The rest of her family will not want to talk to her because we all know what she...
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liar
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5
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537
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Guilt about leaving my A, I need ESH on this?
(Preview)
I have posted about this before, but this time it's more about how I perceive me in this. When I was 17 years old I met my A and I was just starting my senior year. He drank and partied and looked very good in his marine Corps uniform. I was blind right away. He got me out of my dysfunctional family of origin and...
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flopadopilus
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12
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540
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Guess what AH is doing tonight?
(Preview)
Former sober AH is doing what he does best tonight. AlAnon must really be working, because I almost feel amused by it. He is working so hard to convince himeslf there is no problem.....going to AA, saying the right things..... but yet he's at the bar. Thinks he can occassionally drink responsibly...
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Hot Chicka
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15
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672
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Intro and affirmation needed
(Preview)
Hi! My husband is my qualifier although if you ask him he would vehemently deny he has a problem and he has me questioning whether my definition of an alcoholic is right. He drank on average 12 beers a night when we met (3 years ago, my second husband) but I had no idea until he moved in and I noticed the empty...
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scribbler
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12
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492
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My kids :)
(Preview)
God love my children they have a very warped mother, my HP has a wicked sense of humor .. love it .. lol. I did decide to share this story because good grief we had the biggest laugh today over something else that was related. It's been almost two years ago I want to say 2009, I fell and broke my ankle in the ho...
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Pushka
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6
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395
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Update with More Prayer Requests Please...
(Preview)
My MIL I Spoke of in my Last Post, went to hospital in an Ambulance Yesterday, Her Kidneys are Failing and the doctors are doing of course what they can... I Please ask for all to say a Prayer for her, and her pain, and give her the Strength to Fight this... She is One tough Lady, and I know if she gets it in her H...
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Jozie
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6
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303
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Anger, control, and recovery
(Preview)
Each year our family hosts a large Halloween party for our kids and their friends. It's a big production with games, food and a hayride. Our kids love it. Families ask to come back each year (I just had a friend tell me her kids were already asking about the party). It's a lot of work but a lot of fun. Our daug...
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Very Very Tired
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8
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364
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What would my higher power want me to do?
(Preview)
My therapist raised this question with me yesterday; it's something that has crossed my mind in the past. What would my higher power want me to do? How would he want me to handle situations with my wife? Would he want me to be dismissive, to roll my eyes when she's talking, to continually give negative no...
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usedtobeanyer
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5
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550
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Need advice for what to do with my father who is drinking himself to death
(Preview)
I went to my first Al Anon meeting today and it was helpful,but I need any advice anyone can share. My father is 69 and has been an alcoholic his entire life. He lives alone, and within the past 6 months has been hospitalized twice after falling. After the first incident he refused to go to any treatmen...
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mbcasper
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8
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821
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Frustrating Thoughts
(Preview)
I apologize in advance if I am venting, I am just having trouble with my thoughts today. I recently separated from AH after his alcoholism sent him in a downward spiral of insanity this summer, landing him in detox, several relapses, and rehab. Then, he got fired from a very good job that he worked hard...
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nyc018
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5
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559
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recognition
(Preview)
Hey I was just thinking about Pinkchips birthday, and how I am the only offspring in my family that remembers my Dads day of sobriety 4th April 1978. No one commemorates the day my Mum took the step through the Al Anon doors and admitted her part in it. Her addiction to the addiction etc. The people in AA...
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Lindaoakford
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3
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426
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New Here
(Preview)
Hello, I am new here...I have a husband who is an alcoholic. We have 3 children. We have been married for 15 years this Nov 23. I just need a place to go and vent some feelings and frustrations I have with all my feelings. I have never attended a face to face meeting yet, but I do believe that is my next step...
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JustMe74
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6
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484
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Great Meeting tonight
(Preview)
I sincerely had to laugh tonight's meeting was a riot, I mean a straight up crazy riot. Completely off track, however it was just what everyone needed tonight. I loved the part that things didn't have to stay on track to learn something tonight and everyone just laughed and laughed. "Ironing i...
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Pushka
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3
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260
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I'm proud of how I just handled my acoa's outburst
(Preview)
Old me would have gotten upset, yelled, and possibly followed him around trying to calm him down. Today I remained on the couch, silent, listening to him berate me as he left the house, jumped in the truck and left with a burn out that left an approx 30 ft skid mark.
I'm learning that I can only control me...
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lovesanacoa
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7
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373
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Listening to the voice in ME
(Preview)
-- Edited by amills4294 on Tuesday 4th of October 2011 03:11:56 PM
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amills4294
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5
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435
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today is Tues.
(Preview)
Today is Tuesday; you know what that means? It is time to quickly update what I can mention on this site. I have been away from here since Saturday. I am doing very well. I had a long day yesterday completed w/ a movie & a late dinner. Maybe that doesn't sound very exciting except I have to travel over 60...
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Hoot Nanny
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4
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289
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sister struggle
(Preview)
I just found this group today after doing ALOT of research. I have found an Al-anon meeting that I will attend this coming weekend (my FIRST ever!). Heres my story....my sister informed the family at the begining of the year (for the second time) that she was addicted to pills. By this time I was fed u...
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sister121
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4
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412
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY PINKCHIP!
(Preview)
Hi Pinkchip, I was over on the AA board and saw that yesterday was your BD. I'm not sure if it was your belly button BD or your sobriety BD. Either one - I hope you had a wonderful day. Also, I want to take this opportunity to express my gratitude for your shares on this board. I've learned a lot from them, a...
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GailMichelle
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15
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504
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Still can't seem to give up this control thing.
(Preview)
I have been away from MIP for a few weeks to a month and havent been reading here or going to F2F meetings. I am still reading my books though. I had been feeling strong, and like things were going okay. And I also felt like when I posted and read, it only made me think about the issues more. I didnt want to...
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oldgraduate
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7
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665
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My Guilt, Fear, Lack of Control is Choking Me!
(Preview)
Welp... Here is Sit in my Guilt... Not Sure which end is up here of Late... 2 Sundays ago My AGrandma Went into the Hospital for what We thought was a Mini Stroke, Turns out there is Tons more going on, and all of it coming at us so Fast... This Last week I Feel as tho I have lost ALL Program, ALL Self, & AL...
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Jozie
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9
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502
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self care
(Preview)
My Abf has hit his rock bottom again. I know he is ill and I am trying to be caring however he stole money and was aprting with some girl who is not a lady put it that way. I have made amends for my reactions to his latest slip but now he thinks everything is back to normal. Today i told him I need space as i am ang...
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Tracy
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5
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426
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Long time coming, finaly ready to talk.
(Preview)
I'm a 20 year old currently, and though my parents broke up when I was 2 his effect on my life has been large. When I say this it by no means is a good effect. My father does not call me, but when he does see me (which is by force from my uncle) he pretends like he has been there for me telling me he loves me when he se...
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MissHulme
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9
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390
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Just venting,rambling,dumping before I go to bed! VERY LONG sorry!
(Preview)
Ok so I thought I was working the program ok. Got acceptance down or did I? Not tonight! HA! AH was sober for 10 months after rehab, then 6 months ago off wagon. He has been drinking most days, goes sober but can't do it longer than 3 days. Constant denial on how much he drinks, always hiding it and lyi...
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coffeegrounds
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7
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478
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