Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Jackie11 · Jackie11

I have recognized that I have to change me. The anger that I was so often feeling is less and less. I'm more able to let go. The whiskey bottle that was sitting behind the end table next to the couch, was just that, I had no reaction to it. Last night I arrived home and my husband was working on dinner, it was fa...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

Since I started going to Al-anon face to face meetings almost a year ago, I have experienced the death of a few relationships. I have outgrown some of these and some people didn't want to deal with my self righteousness, I had early in my program (I wanted to force feed Al-anon to everyone dear to me). It i...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

I know that some of us feel trapped by our situation especially if the primary provider is the A in our lives. I have been thinking that I need to prepare for the future and maybe think about a career path. I have a 4 year degree and was a stock broker working in institutional investing for a few years befo...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

OK so I overreacted to the family thing I was going through--maybe they just didn't want to upset me & set off my darn disease! I have talked to them via FACEBOOK through pictures. Some of them were really old 1990, & they loved them! It was so cool to bond w/ them w/ the pictures. They couldn't rem...

jazzcat · jazzcat

I've been going to Al-Anon for several weeks now. He has relapsed, and has pushed me out of his life for the most part. I now understand what I can and can't change, but I seem to still have doubts that it is his disease that pushes me away. But I've done and said so many things that were wrong or hurtful in the...

KimK · KimK

Hi everyone. I am new here. Having a very stressful day. My husband of 10 years is an alcoholic. We have had some bad times throughout the years, but this, by far, has been the worst yet. Most of the Summer was good. He really didn't drink much....We got along well. About 3 weeks ago, he stayed out mo...

afares · afares

Three years ago, our whole world came apart. I ended up in the hospital sufferring from a major depression that stemmed from me trying to cover up the mess my husband and my life had become. I started to work on myself and my husband went in and out of sobriety for a while. Thankfully he has been sober for 18...

rrib · rrib

Deblyn's post a few days ago Well do you love them????? reminded me that I do much better when I remember to be grateful for what I have. And of something I'd read, an excerpt from the book Awakening In Time by Jacquelyn Small. Kat and I liked is so much, we included it at our wedding. Not that we remember to...

Whitehydrangia · Whitehydrangia

I feel kind of lonely today and am pondering about my life; who I have become, my codependency issues, what my feelings are, and where I want my life to go. I have a BSN in Nursing and have worked at a hospital for 18 years. Shortly after I started working, I met my A and little by little, my life turned into...

TeachMe · TeachMe

I am brand new to this, but have been reading posts since 4am. All of the posts have given me strength, thank you everyone! My AH left 3 days ago. I told him to go after weeks of him threatening to leave. He is on medication for depression which can not be combined with alcohol. Problem is he told his ther...

floweroflife · floweroflife

I am married to an active alcoholic, and right now - I'm really angry about it. There aren't any meetings in my area tonight that I can attend, so in the interest of full disclosure - I found this site and am just here to vent. I'm new to Al-Anon and haven't been to many meetings, so in addition to venting I'l...

Jozie · Jozie

I would Have to say without the Love & Support that I have thru Al-Anon/ACOA I truly wouldn't have a Clue were My Life may have Lead these Last 3 years... Its Almost Scary to think when I Look back at Where I Began when this Newest Journey took roots... Currently My knowledge and know how on the "L...

noelle2 · noelle2

So today is a hard day, I'm feeling resentful for having to take over the money and put it in his account bit by bit as he needs things like gas. I took the cards in anger last week when he "slipped " and went to the liquor store again the third weekend in a row. He has since asked me to keep all the mo...

kitty · kitty

I cant get into the chat room today, is anyone else having issues with entry or is it bc i dont know how to use this new pc? ugh, help

Very Very Tired · Very Very Tired

I had an HP moment: one of those times when I really look at myself in the mirror and see what lies deep beneath my heart. I have had a few posts lately about setting my "no driving the kids" boundary with my AH. I thought I was doing it to protect the kids. And I am. But, there is something deeper....

liljeannie · liljeannie

I need some guidance here.... I have been trying for so long and so hard to move forward and away from my past experiences and the more I try, the worse I feel. I have no real closure as I am still awaiting my day in court for the assault. I was denied AGAIN by SS for disability even though I am in no way physic...

sirchef · sirchef

As is usual for me I have trouble with so many slogans and sayings. This one is one that has given me some real pause for thought. Do we really recover from the hurts and betrayals we recieve at the hands of those we love? I listen and listen to so many including myself talk about wounds that never heal. So it...

Lindaoakford · Lindaoakford

HI I have heard this term a few times on this board... the committee in my head. Can I please have a full explanation of what you guys mean? I am thinking it means when we argue with ourselves. thanks

kris10 · kris10

Trying soo hard to sleep but the fact that my Abf is nodding out next to me high on heroin wont get out of my head... As he noddes out next to me in bed with a lit cigarette in his hand falling on top of him i cant help but want to smack him in the back of the head and tell him " wake up dumb@$$ you are burning you...

Pushka · Pushka

Ohhh boy ... the next 2 weeks are going to be interesting. I'm in the process of working with my mom on airline tickets to go out there. I've left it up to her as she's graciously paying for the tickets. My personality is more towards just tell me where to be and what time and I'll work it out on my end. Esp...

kris10 · kris10

So I have been wanting to get a membership at the YMCA but I've been avoiding it because I know that my As drug dealer goes there.... THIS PERSON I CAN'T STAND WITH A PASSION.... He is by far the snakiest person I've ever met. This is my As "best friend" for years EXCEPT for when he was sober or in t...

jazzcat · jazzcat

All of my posts are saying they have been flagged as spam, and must be cleared by an administrator. They haven't appeared on the message board. Any ideas?

Very Very Tired · Very Very Tired

I realized a few weeks ago that I sometimes make excuses for not getting to a F2F meeting. If my AH is out of town or sick or whatever, I use that as an excuse not to go to my home meeting. If AH isn't home or available, I don't have anyone to drive the kids to their evening activities. I finally admitted this ex...

danni · danni

so, my first time on a message board, but i have two small children and am up too early to make an outreach call. my husband is not sober but is functioning. his drinking is getting worse and is back to about every other day.so i am dealing with a hangover every other morning as well. thankful his drinki...

Golightly24 · Golightly24

Last night, my AB came to the Halloween party my friend and I threw. He is 3 months out of rehab. Usually I have the party at my house but didn't want to put him in that situation and decided to have it elsewhere. I don't drink or do drugs (just don't like it). My friends aren't big drinkers either. My AB came a...

KLotus · KLotus

I went to a meeting yesterday :) It was my homegroup meeting, which I haven't been to in ages. I flexed my time at work, skipping out a bit, and met with my sponsor beforehand. I was feeling like "Ok! You win (God)! Tell me what to do (Sponsor)." I cannot control my recovering alcoholic h...

HoofnIt · HoofnIt

I have really had enough of my BF coming home drunk after saying "don't worry I'll be sober" or lying to me before i even ask. Last night the very 1st thing he said to me was "don't worry, I'm good" which was suppose to mean he wasn't drinking. With in 5 minutes of looking at him i could...

KimK · KimK

I was reading through one of the posts here tonight,, and read a line posted by rehprof....Stay out of crazy town....It struck me as funny and kept running through my head....Makes perfect sense.... I've been to crazy town more times than I care to remember, and I wish I could have back all the tears an...

amills4294 · amills4294

I thought I would share - this was very powerful for me and my HP put this in front of me today when I most needed it. True to Ourselves: November 8 This above all: to thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man. William Shakespeare To thine own self b...

Grace7 · Grace7

My Ex-"A" is the source of my frustration, but more than that, the lack of resources to protect the community at large from him and including my grandchildren from being in his prescence when he owns a firearm with ammo and gets it out to shoot immaginary predators due to his dillusions etc....

SCARLETT · SCARLETT

I'm new to this forum. Not new to 12 step programs. I currently am practicing duel enrollment :). I'm married to a recovering heroin addict. He has been in a program for 9 months and has another 2 months to graduate the program. We visit regularly and communicate well. Or so I thought. Recently he has bee...

rehprof · rehprof

First court date today to divorce my AH. He will only go for half my retirement, he says, and he will not ask me for alimony as long as I don't ask him for any child support. Wow. He hasn't worked in well over a year because of drinking and pain pills...I'm struggling to keep oil in the tank and food on the tabl...

rara avis · rara avis

Hey all, Sorry to vent again, but then again this info might be useful to anyone who will go through the restraining order process. fyi any of you who do, I recommend a lawyer, advocate, etc...basically as many people as you can to help navigate the paperwork. It is highly time consuming and aggravati...

afares · afares

Over the past week since my husband has started to act a little different I have hit rock bottom within myself. He has become distant and it has thrown me way out of control. I never realized how much dealing with a sober alcoholic father and an alcholic husband have done to me over the years. I have put u...

amills4294 · amills4294

I read alot of these posts - I attend face to face alanon meetings and I am starting to work he steps. What I have the most issue with is not feeling bad or guilty for not meeting the wants/desires of others. I know that a decsion that I need to make is looming and I've known for a long time the direction that...

HisWife24 · HisWife24

I have recently just been introduced to this website. It has been very helpful in the last couple of days as my AH and I are now at a point where we can, again, approach his drinking for what it really is with the help of family and AA. This time around my AH sees his drinking as a problem and something he needs...

danni · danni

Last night, after a few days of my husband's anger escalating and lashing out at me and the kids, he apologized and asked what I was feeling. His drinking has escalated this week along with his anger level. I said I noticed he was drinking more (this is the first I had mentioned it) and that when he drink...

Beckatitis · Beckatitis

Lately I feel as if I am being sucked into a hole, which will swallow me whole and never let me out. Alcoholism has played a major role in a majority of lives, within my immediate family. Both of my parents, who have never really been together, have overcome their addictions and no longer drink. My mom doe...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I just found out that my father has stage 4 cancer. No one even told me that I can remember. I knew he had cancer but no one informed me about it. I am getting very tired of feeling left out of everything. It makes me feel like I am on an island, drifting away! Last night I finally talked to my older sister. She s...

Pushka · Pushka

I'm headed out of town in a couple of weeks this is a big deal as it's the first time I will be childless AND without a spouse in over 13 years. That is a big milestone. Asked me 5 years ago if I would leave the kids with my AH and the answer would have been a resounding NO WAY!! I figure 7 days of no baths for the y...

Jackie11 · Jackie11

I was able to get away for the weekend to visit a friend of mine. I enjoyed the stunning drive through the VA mountains. Was able to enjoy the time spent with my friend. Her daughter turned 8 and she has 2 babies under 2 plus a little boy so I went up to offer an extra set of hands for the weekend. Before I left I g...

Debilyn · Debilyn

http://vimeo.com/31158841 I hope you can see this. I am in complete awe. love.....

Lindaoakford · Lindaoakford

Well.. not sure if I said much about this on this board, but I have been to a psychologist today. I have tried a few counsellors and such, but none seem to really 'get' what it is about me that I want to work on. Today, I spoke about BPD traits and how I feel fit most of them when we look back over the history of m...

Rosyrosy · Rosyrosy

Hello I think I already understand that I won't get advice here but maybe someone can offer me some wisdom... There is an Al-Anon meeting near me this evening and I am considering attending for the first time (I am 33). I would say that I carry a lot of pain about a number of drinkers in my mother's family,...

Lindaoakford · Lindaoakford

Hi I am starting to think I must have the worse memory in the world. On Saturday, I went out to the shops for about an hour. I knew in my heart he would have a smoke and I was only half uptight about it. Before I went home, I rang to see if we needed anything, milk or whatever. I had to ring a number of times befo...

mannaguy · mannaguy

Hi. I've been having some severe panic attacks the past few days. My GF of nine months 1st assaulted me back in March.Luckily I wasn't bruised or scarred and security at the bar wisely separated us and took her away.Shortly after I went to Alanon and it became apparent to me that she was not the only alcoh...

kris10 · kris10

What Happens to this Kitten Will Really Move You - Click Here to Watch the Video =) www.godvine.com Love this one!!!

KLotus · KLotus

I have not felt well for the last couple of days. Today I started feeling a bit better, and had been asked to meet with a friend for tea. Usually I would bring my 18 month old with me, but was really feeling like I needed a couple of hours just for me. I have a long work week ahead, a stressfull one. My husba...

mdkm0726 · mdkm0726

I had to call DFS for my daughter and her children since the family has no electric and is living in unfit conditions. The worker called me today and what a small world. The worker lives just across the street from me..HP comes in when you least expect it. The worker feels a connection to me and my famil...

Hal Lee · Hal Lee

Does anyone have an experience trying to help an adult child who uses alcohol to self-medicate to make his Tourete's Syndrome symptoms better? Is he a special case or do the normal methods of Al-Anon apply? Need your imput please. Thanks

Not Alone · Not Alone

>sigh< I thought he was doing so well. About a month ago AB hit rock bottom - no need for the details except to say it was bad. He started counselling and started AA. I thought he was doing well. Well, over the weekend I could smell it on him and his behavior confirmed it - not the drunken behavior bu...

afares · afares

My husband (16 months sober) and I are going through a very difficult time right now and it is leaving me lost and very lonely. He has been very withdrawn lately and no longer is very into our relationship which we have been trying to rebuild. We have began to deal with the financial mess that we have gott...

No words · No words

My husband just got out of inpatient rehab 10 days ago and is already drinking. Those 10 days were fabulous - full of hope, optomism and plans for the future. Then this freak storm knocked us out of power and he used the stress as an excuse to start drinking. Of course he hid it and if course I knew. I tried to...

Very Very Tired · Very Very Tired

I'm holding to my boundary that the kids cannot be in the car with AH driving. Over the course of the past year, I've asked twice that he not drink then drive the kids. He is able to do that for awhile, then he goes right back to drinking then driving the kids. AH has shown me what he is going to do, so I had to dec...

noelle2 · noelle2

we have a 11mos old and just moved, i found a bottle in front of him and he confessed, he had been drinking for the past month, probably longer because i dont know what i can believe. He has "slipped" each weekend since, today I caught it because I wanted a sip of his drink and to my surprise it wa...

kris10 · kris10

So far so good.. He went to his meeting with one of his friends.. Came home in a good mood. Mentioned that there was a girl there that confessed that she had a relapse but was now 5 days sober.. Didnt understand why people were so happy for her new 5 days.. Said he just doesnt ever count the days he is sober. Sa...

afares · afares

I wrote about my husbands anger and lack of attention yesterday and so many people helped with everything they wrote. I have been reading and going to meetins trying to learn how to handle the life I have right now and it is so hard. I have been trying to understand the way my husband is being right now an...

oldergal · oldergal

So what do you do when you think your A-son (28) has stolen from you? He knows my shed is open because some of his belongings are in there. This was something still new in a box and was expensive. That's what I get for being so trusting. My fault for not locking things down. I accused him, but I still don't kno...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

I was reading one of my many books "The language of Letting Go" by Melody Beattie and it occurred to me I haven't felt trapped in a long time. I have learned to make decisions and own them by being true to myself lately. I am not giving into guilt when anyone tries to pull it. I am not making choice...

All I can be · All I can be

Time Change? Time and Change ... a tough choice... I'll take Change so the Time will be well spent. Bill

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	50/50 (Preview) I have recognized that I have to change me. The anger that I was so often feeling is less and less. I'm more able to let go. The whiskey bottle that was sitting behind the end table next to the couch, was just that, I had no reaction to it. Last night I arrived home and my husband was working on dinner, it was fa...	Jackie11	10	656	Nov 11, 2011 by amills4294
	The death of a relationship (Preview) Since I started going to Al-anon face to face meetings almost a year ago, I have experienced the death of a few relationships. I have outgrown some of these and some people didn't want to deal with my self righteousness, I had early in my program (I wanted to force feed Al-anon to everyone dear to me). It i...	Breakingfree	9	1100	Nov 11, 2011 by orchidlover
	Off topic here, thinking about future careers (Preview) I know that some of us feel trapped by our situation especially if the primary provider is the A in our lives. I have been thinking that I need to prepare for the future and maybe think about a career path. I have a 4 year degree and was a stock broker working in institutional investing for a few years befo...	ilovedogs	6	469	Nov 11, 2011 by Breakingfree
	I have to admit is IS getting better! (Preview) OK so I overreacted to the family thing I was going through--maybe they just didn't want to upset me & set off my darn disease! I have talked to them via FACEBOOK through pictures. Some of them were really old 1990, & they loved them! It was so cool to bond w/ them w/ the pictures. They couldn't rem...	Hoot Nanny	3	333	Nov 11, 2011 by tommyecat
	Guilt About Past Mistakes (Preview) I've been going to Al-Anon for several weeks now. He has relapsed, and has pushed me out of his life for the most part. I now understand what I can and can't change, but I seem to still have doubts that it is his disease that pushes me away. But I've done and said so many things that were wrong or hurtful in the...	jazzcat	20	729	Nov 11, 2011 by KeepingFaith
	Live with a Jekyll and Hyde (Preview) Hi everyone. I am new here. Having a very stressful day. My husband of 10 years is an alcoholic. We have had some bad times throughout the years, but this, by far, has been the worst yet. Most of the Summer was good. He really didn't drink much....We got along well. About 3 weeks ago, he stayed out mo...	KimK	12	6460	Nov 10, 2011 by likemyheart
	i have found my rock bottom (Preview) Three years ago, our whole world came apart. I ended up in the hospital sufferring from a major depression that stemmed from me trying to cover up the mess my husband and my life had become. I started to work on myself and my husband went in and out of sobriety for a while. Thankfully he has been sober for 18...	afares	13	717	Nov 10, 2011 by orchidlover
	Reminded ... (Preview) Deblyn's post a few days ago Well do you love them????? reminded me that I do much better when I remember to be grateful for what I have. And of something I'd read, an excerpt from the book Awakening In Time by Jacquelyn Small. Kat and I liked is so much, we included it at our wedding. Not that we remember to...	rrib	13	663	Nov 10, 2011 by GailMichelle
	Sliding Down A Slope (Preview) I feel kind of lonely today and am pondering about my life; who I have become, my codependency issues, what my feelings are, and where I want my life to go. I have a BSN in Nursing and have worked at a hospital for 18 years. Shortly after I started working, I met my A and little by little, my life turned into...	Whitehydrangia	6	592	Nov 10, 2011 by pinkchip
	New and devastated (Preview) I am brand new to this, but have been reading posts since 4am. All of the posts have given me strength, thank you everyone! My AH left 3 days ago. I told him to go after weeks of him threatening to leave. He is on medication for depression which can not be combined with alcohol. Problem is he told his ther...	TeachMe	10	581	Nov 10, 2011 by tommyecat
	Tired of riding the roller coaster (Preview) I am married to an active alcoholic, and right now - I'm really angry about it. There aren't any meetings in my area tonight that I can attend, so in the interest of full disclosure - I found this site and am just here to vent. I'm new to Al-Anon and haven't been to many meetings, so in addition to venting I'l...	floweroflife	14	698	Nov 10, 2011 by Pushka
	Only One Moment at a Time.... (Preview) I would Have to say without the Love & Support that I have thru Al-Anon/ACOA I truly wouldn't have a Clue were My Life may have Lead these Last 3 years... Its Almost Scary to think when I Look back at Where I Began when this Newest Journey took roots... Currently My knowledge and know how on the "L...	Jozie	6	634	Nov 10, 2011 by Jozie
	ARRRGH!!! (Preview) So today is a hard day, I'm feeling resentful for having to take over the money and put it in his account bit by bit as he needs things like gas. I took the cards in anger last week when he "slipped " and went to the liquor store again the third weekend in a row. He has since asked me to keep all the mo...	noelle2	8	495	Nov 10, 2011 by rosielee
	trouble loading chat room (Preview) I cant get into the chat room today, is anyone else having issues with entry or is it bc i dont know how to use this new pc? ugh, help	kitty	10	601	Nov 10, 2011 by kitty
	Getting Honest (Preview) I had an HP moment: one of those times when I really look at myself in the mirror and see what lies deep beneath my heart. I have had a few posts lately about setting my "no driving the kids" boundary with my AH. I thought I was doing it to protect the kids. And I am. But, there is something deeper....	Very Very Tired	11	467	Nov 10, 2011 by danni
	Scared and lost....and so lonely (Preview) I need some guidance here.... I have been trying for so long and so hard to move forward and away from my past experiences and the more I try, the worse I feel. I have no real closure as I am still awaiting my day in court for the assault. I was denied AGAIN by SS for disability even though I am in no way physic...	liljeannie	9	603	Nov 10, 2011 by Pushka
	recovery (Preview) As is usual for me I have trouble with so many slogans and sayings. This one is one that has given me some real pause for thought. Do we really recover from the hurts and betrayals we recieve at the hands of those we love? I listen and listen to so many including myself talk about wounds that never heal. So it...	sirchef	8	829	Nov 10, 2011 by abbyal
	committee in my head (Preview) HI I have heard this term a few times on this board... the committee in my head. Can I please have a full explanation of what you guys mean? I am thinking it means when we argue with ourselves. thanks	Lindaoakford	11	1902	Nov 9, 2011 by hotrod
	How do i sleep.... (Preview) Trying soo hard to sleep but the fact that my Abf is nodding out next to me high on heroin wont get out of my head... As he noddes out next to me in bed with a lit cigarette in his hand falling on top of him i cant help but want to smack him in the back of the head and tell him " wake up dumb@$$ you are burning you...	kris10	13	590	Nov 9, 2011 by kris10
	Putting the program to the pavement .. lol (Preview) Ohhh boy ... the next 2 weeks are going to be interesting. I'm in the process of working with my mom on airline tickets to go out there. I've left it up to her as she's graciously paying for the tickets. My personality is more towards just tell me where to be and what time and I'll work it out on my end. Esp...	Pushka	4	429	Nov 9, 2011 by pineapple
	run in with As dealer..... (Preview) So I have been wanting to get a membership at the YMCA but I've been avoiding it because I know that my As drug dealer goes there.... THIS PERSON I CAN'T STAND WITH A PASSION.... He is by far the snakiest person I've ever met. This is my As "best friend" for years EXCEPT for when he was sober or in t...	kris10	12	510	Nov 9, 2011 by youfoundme
	Posts all say they are flagged as spam? (Preview) All of my posts are saying they have been flagged as spam, and must be cleared by an administrator. They haven't appeared on the message board. Any ideas?	jazzcat	3	343	Nov 9, 2011 by jazzcat
	Excuses (Preview) I realized a few weeks ago that I sometimes make excuses for not getting to a F2F meeting. If my AH is out of town or sick or whatever, I use that as an excuse not to go to my home meeting. If AH isn't home or available, I don't have anyone to drive the kids to their evening activities. I finally admitted this ex...	Very Very Tired	6	450	Nov 9, 2011 by Breakingfree
	Trying to detatch from my husbands hangover (Preview) so, my first time on a message board, but i have two small children and am up too early to make an outreach call. my husband is not sober but is functioning. his drinking is getting worse and is back to about every other day.so i am dealing with a hangover every other morning as well. thankful his drinki...	danni	12	884	Nov 9, 2011 by danni
	"how could you let him..." (Preview) Last night, my AB came to the Halloween party my friend and I threw. He is 3 months out of rehab. Usually I have the party at my house but didn't want to put him in that situation and decided to have it elsewhere. I don't drink or do drugs (just don't like it). My friends aren't big drinkers either. My AB came a...	Golightly24	16	1099	Nov 9, 2011 by Breakingfree
	Update (Preview) I went to a meeting yesterday :) It was my homegroup meeting, which I haven't been to in ages. I flexed my time at work, skipping out a bit, and met with my sponsor beforehand. I was feeling like "Ok! You win (God)! Tell me what to do (Sponsor)." I cannot control my recovering alcoholic h...	KLotus	7	394	Nov 9, 2011 by KLotus
	need some opinons (Preview) I have really had enough of my BF coming home drunk after saying "don't worry I'll be sober" or lying to me before i even ask. Last night the very 1st thing he said to me was "don't worry, I'm good" which was suppose to mean he wasn't drinking. With in 5 minutes of looking at him i could...	HoofnIt	11	512	Nov 9, 2011 by nyc018
	Stay out of Crazy Town (Preview) I was reading through one of the posts here tonight,, and read a line posted by rehprof....Stay out of crazy town....It struck me as funny and kept running through my head....Makes perfect sense.... I've been to crazy town more times than I care to remember, and I wish I could have back all the tears an...	KimK	4	401	Nov 9, 2011 by Pushka
	Being True to Ourselves (Preview) I thought I would share - this was very powerful for me and my HP put this in front of me today when I most needed it. True to Ourselves: November 8 This above all: to thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man. William Shakespeare To thine own self b...	amills4294	6	529	Nov 9, 2011 by tommyecat
	Frustrated! (Preview) My Ex-"A" is the source of my frustration, but more than that, the lack of resources to protect the community at large from him and including my grandchildren from being in his prescence when he owns a firearm with ammo and gets it out to shoot immaginary predators due to his dillusions etc....	Grace7	4	618	Nov 9, 2011 by tommyecat
	confused (Preview) I'm new to this forum. Not new to 12 step programs. I currently am practicing duel enrollment :). I'm married to a recovering heroin addict. He has been in a program for 9 months and has another 2 months to graduate the program. We visit regularly and communicate well. Or so I thought. Recently he has bee...	SCARLETT	9	458	Nov 9, 2011 by SCARLETT
	Tough day ahead (Preview) First court date today to divorce my AH. He will only go for half my retirement, he says, and he will not ask me for alimony as long as I don't ask him for any child support. Wow. He hasn't worked in well over a year because of drinking and pain pills...I'm struggling to keep oil in the tank and food on the tabl...	rehprof	8	556	Nov 8, 2011 by pinkchip
	Pushed beyond the point of sanity (Preview) Hey all, Sorry to vent again, but then again this info might be useful to anyone who will go through the restraining order process. fyi any of you who do, I recommend a lawyer, advocate, etc...basically as many people as you can to help navigate the paperwork. It is highly time consuming and aggravati...	rara avis	9	658	Nov 8, 2011 by likemyheart
	Revelations About Myself (Preview) Over the past week since my husband has started to act a little different I have hit rock bottom within myself. He has become distant and it has thrown me way out of control. I never realized how much dealing with a sober alcoholic father and an alcholic husband have done to me over the years. I have put u...	afares	4	418	Nov 8, 2011 by afares
	Working on not feeling guilt when taking care of me (Preview) I read alot of these posts - I attend face to face alanon meetings and I am starting to work he steps. What I have the most issue with is not feeling bad or guilty for not meeting the wants/desires of others. I know that a decsion that I need to make is looming and I've known for a long time the direction that...	amills4294	6	464	Nov 8, 2011 by abbyal
	Just Need Some Words of Encouragement (Preview) I have recently just been introduced to this website. It has been very helpful in the last couple of days as my AH and I are now at a point where we can, again, approach his drinking for what it really is with the help of family and AA. This time around my AH sees his drinking as a problem and something he needs...	HisWife24	15	2358	Nov 8, 2011 by pinkchip
	Not sure I should have said that (Preview) Last night, after a few days of my husband's anger escalating and lashing out at me and the kids, he apologized and asked what I was feeling. His drinking has escalated this week along with his anger level. I said I noticed he was drinking more (this is the first I had mentioned it) and that when he drink...	danni	8	572	Nov 8, 2011 by pinkchip
	I hope and pray.. (Preview) Lately I feel as if I am being sucked into a hole, which will swallow me whole and never let me out. Alcoholism has played a major role in a majority of lives, within my immediate family. Both of my parents, who have never really been together, have overcome their addictions and no longer drink. My mom doe...	Beckatitis	4	463	Nov 8, 2011 by rrib
	so tired (Preview) I just found out that my father has stage 4 cancer. No one even told me that I can remember. I knew he had cancer but no one informed me about it. I am getting very tired of feeling left out of everything. It makes me feel like I am on an island, drifting away! Last night I finally talked to my older sister. She s...	Hoot Nanny	3	388	Nov 7, 2011 by Breakingfree
	Going on a trip (Preview) I'm headed out of town in a couple of weeks this is a big deal as it's the first time I will be childless AND without a spouse in over 13 years. That is a big milestone. Asked me 5 years ago if I would leave the kids with my AH and the answer would have been a resounding NO WAY!! I figure 7 days of no baths for the y...	Pushka	3	346	Nov 7, 2011 by Breakingfree
	Letting go (Preview) I was able to get away for the weekend to visit a friend of mine. I enjoyed the stunning drive through the VA mountains. Was able to enjoy the time spent with my friend. Her daughter turned 8 and she has 2 babies under 2 plus a little boy so I went up to offer an extra set of hands for the weekend. Before I left I g...	Jackie11	8	593	Nov 7, 2011 by Lindaoakford
	A true gift!!!! (Preview) http://vimeo.com/31158841 I hope you can see this. I am in complete awe. love.....	Debilyn	5	392	Nov 7, 2011 by orchidlover
	BPD (Preview) Well.. not sure if I said much about this on this board, but I have been to a psychologist today. I have tried a few counsellors and such, but none seem to really 'get' what it is about me that I want to work on. Today, I spoke about BPD traits and how I feel fit most of them when we look back over the history of m...	Lindaoakford	19	3432	Nov 7, 2011 by Lindaoakford
	Should I go to meeting? (Preview) Hello I think I already understand that I won't get advice here but maybe someone can offer me some wisdom... There is an Al-Anon meeting near me this evening and I am considering attending for the first time (I am 33). I would say that I carry a lot of pain about a number of drinkers in my mother's family,...	Rosyrosy	10	701	Nov 7, 2011 by tommyecat
	Do I just forget??? (Preview) Hi I am starting to think I must have the worse memory in the world. On Saturday, I went out to the shops for about an hour. I knew in my heart he would have a smoke and I was only half uptight about it. Before I went home, I rang to see if we needed anything, milk or whatever. I had to ring a number of times befo...	Lindaoakford	12	736	Nov 7, 2011 by Lindaoakford
	PTSD from previous assaults. (Preview) Hi. I've been having some severe panic attacks the past few days. My GF of nine months 1st assaulted me back in March.Luckily I wasn't bruised or scarred and security at the bar wisely separated us and took her away.Shortly after I went to Alanon and it became apparent to me that she was not the only alcoh...	mannaguy	11	561	Nov 7, 2011 by mannaguy
	Never lose hope... (Preview) What Happens to this Kitten Will Really Move You - Click Here to Watch the Video =) www.godvine.com Love this one!!!	kris10	4	417	Nov 7, 2011 by tommyecat
	Trying to ask for what I need (Preview) I have not felt well for the last couple of days. Today I started feeling a bit better, and had been asked to meet with a friend for tea. Usually I would bring my 18 month old with me, but was really feeling like I needed a couple of hours just for me. I have a long work week ahead, a stressfull one. My husba...	KLotus	5	542	Nov 7, 2011 by Pushka
	Addict Daughter with 3 small Children - update (Preview) I had to call DFS for my daughter and her children since the family has no electric and is living in unfit conditions. The worker called me today and what a small world. The worker lives just across the street from me..HP comes in when you least expect it. The worker feels a connection to me and my famil...	mdkm0726	4	414	Nov 7, 2011 by rosielee
	Al-Anon, alcoholism & Tourette's? (Preview) Does anyone have an experience trying to help an adult child who uses alcohol to self-medicate to make his Tourete's Syndrome symptoms better? Is he a special case or do the normal methods of Al-Anon apply? Need your imput please. Thanks	Hal Lee	14	1072	Nov 7, 2011 by Hal Lee
	disappointment... (Preview) >sigh< I thought he was doing so well. About a month ago AB hit rock bottom - no need for the details except to say it was bad. He started counselling and started AA. I thought he was doing well. Well, over the weekend I could smell it on him and his behavior confirmed it - not the drunken behavior bu...	Not Alone	7	963	Nov 7, 2011 by rosielee
	Feeling lost - New to alanon but want a new way of life (Preview) My husband (16 months sober) and I are going through a very difficult time right now and it is leaving me lost and very lonely. He has been very withdrawn lately and no longer is very into our relationship which we have been trying to rebuild. We have began to deal with the financial mess that we have gott...	afares	14	744	Nov 7, 2011 by tommyecat
	Just out of rehab and drinking (Preview) My husband just got out of inpatient rehab 10 days ago and is already drinking. Those 10 days were fabulous - full of hope, optomism and plans for the future. Then this freak storm knocked us out of power and he used the stress as an excuse to start drinking. Of course he hid it and if course I knew. I tried to...	No words	16	3969	Nov 7, 2011 by tommyecat
	Exhausted (Preview) I'm holding to my boundary that the kids cannot be in the car with AH driving. Over the course of the past year, I've asked twice that he not drink then drive the kids. He is able to do that for awhile, then he goes right back to drinking then driving the kids. AH has shown me what he is going to do, so I had to dec...	Very Very Tired	16	571	Nov 7, 2011 by Very Very Tired
	what do i do, please any help (Preview) we have a 11mos old and just moved, i found a bottle in front of him and he confessed, he had been drinking for the past month, probably longer because i dont know what i can believe. He has "slipped" each weekend since, today I caught it because I wanted a sip of his drink and to my surprise it wa...	noelle2	9	836	Nov 7, 2011 by tommyecat
	Update to AA for my A (Preview) So far so good.. He went to his meeting with one of his friends.. Came home in a good mood. Mentioned that there was a girl there that confessed that she had a relapse but was now 5 days sober.. Didnt understand why people were so happy for her new 5 days.. Said he just doesnt ever count the days he is sober. Sa...	kris10	11	435	Nov 7, 2011 by tommyecat
	Dont know how to act!!! Anxiety is high and confused (Preview) I wrote about my husbands anger and lack of attention yesterday and so many people helped with everything they wrote. I have been reading and going to meetins trying to learn how to handle the life I have right now and it is so hard. I have been trying to understand the way my husband is being right now an...	afares	8	678	Nov 7, 2011 by tommyecat
	STOLEN THINGS (Preview) So what do you do when you think your A-son (28) has stolen from you? He knows my shed is open because some of his belongings are in there. This was something still new in a box and was expensive. That's what I get for being so trusting. My fault for not locking things down. I accused him, but I still don't kno...	oldergal	7	590	Nov 7, 2011 by tommyecat
	Not feeling trapped any longer (Preview) I was reading one of my many books "The language of Letting Go" by Melody Beattie and it occurred to me I haven't felt trapped in a long time. I have learned to make decisions and own them by being true to myself lately. I am not giving into guilt when anyone tries to pull it. I am not making choice...	Breakingfree	4	449	Nov 7, 2011 by amills4294
	Time Change? (Preview) Time Change? Time and Change ... a tough choice... I'll take Change so the Time will be well spent. Bill	All I can be	2	395	Nov 7, 2011 by tommyecat
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.