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Reflection on My 3 Year Alanon Birthday
(Preview)
I just returned from my home group meeting tonight. We honor members' Alanon birthdays during our last meeting of the month, so today was the day I received my three year token. As corny as it sounds, it really does seem like yesterday when I arrived at my first Alanon meeting. I had hit bottom. I was a cry...
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Green Eyes
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6
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335
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Feeling neglected by my AH
(Preview)
My AH has decided to throw himself into his job since his DUI. He is keeping his distance from me and hasn't made any advances intimately, at all. If I don't approach him for a hug, I wouldn't get one. I had a friend in Al Anon tell me that he's probably just beating himself up so much right now that he does...
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ilovedogs
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8
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586
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Stugglin Again at Loss.... :'(
(Preview)
Sorry Its Been awhile again, Just so Much Goin on and Seems to be No End in Sight... I want to Thank ALL of You that Prayed for My Friend Patty that Had Cancer... Her Lord Took Her Home a little over a Week ago, and Tho I Miss her Dearly, What she Taught me these Last 3 years in Al-Anon, I will Hold Dear to My He...
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Jozie
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6
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512
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Panic-- any ideas would be welcomed
(Preview)
I need to kick both my adult children out of my home! long story short my oldest is accusing my youngest of stealing from him, he is missing money this morning and swears he didn't loose it at the bar last night while he was out drinking. He believes his little brother took the money this morning while he w...
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debbiems
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6
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442
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The brief encounter with my past
(Preview)
Hello Everyone, It has been a minute since I last wrote here, but I guess that is a good thing. I tend to vent on here when i worry about my ex. It has been almost 2 months since it has been over and I never felt better. I have started excersing and losing weight. Getting back into my arts and hobbies and busin...
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Julie3310
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4
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319
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A Newbie's Update
(Preview)
Update: I did attend my first "real" meeting tonight with my son. We plan to go back. Everyone was very nice and made us feel welcome. Also, I did get the job at the Attorney's office so I am now working two days a week there but I believe it will soon be three days a week which will ease my mind a l...
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WornOutMrsFixIt
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6
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470
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Just for Today
(Preview)
Just for today, I am choosing to stay married to my AH. I am choosing to be grateful, instead of hurt, that he will not contact me at all this morning...grateful that I will be spared the drama. Today i am choosing to focus on all the positives in my life, to simply accept that I am tired and sore from movin...
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stephaniej
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4
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377
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Big 4 weeks
(Preview)
Ok .. I thought I was ready to switch over to a whole month however not yet .. lol. Maybe at 8 weeks I will feel better about it. Long and short of things, my worst fear happened and I had a light bulb moment that I"m going to be ok. The kids are going to be ok too. The kids have been what I'm really strug...
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Pushka
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6
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435
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New Kid on the Block
(Preview)
So happy to have found this discussion board this morning. Won't go into all the details of how I found it but I do believe it was an answered prayer. I have done a lot of searching for information on the internet but I believe I've found what I'm looking for here. My husband and I have been married for 25 y...
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WornOutMrsFixIt
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13
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556
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My Story
(Preview)
I told "My Story" this last Thursday night at the open AA/Alanon meeting. I just wanted you all to know how enriching this was for me. I was nervous but it just felt so right to do. The members of AA/Alanon want my AH and I to be the speakers at the next roundup. What a compliment! Will we do this...
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Sweet Stanley
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3
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387
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waiting on them-sad
(Preview)
okay, I will try and make this short. I am struggling tonight because I miss my parents and siblings. I really miss them but at the same time being around them makes me not feel so good and I am really working on recovery and making progress and finding some serenity. There has been very minimal contact...
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daisy31
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6
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425
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February's End
(Preview)
My husband and I had an argument. No one flipped out or got over dramatic. He heard me out. I heard him out. Then he did the dishes and I vacuumed the living room. He said he used to have to be right but with the help from AA he does not have to anymore. I was wondering if I am an alcoholic because I started thin...
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Michelle814
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9
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352
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Same ole nonsense
(Preview)
So my ex is angry at me (again) - because I had the audacity to leave a message three days after he was supposed to give some money (but didn't)towards HIS motorcycle payment which I'd been paying on alone for the last four months. I have decided that I will take the credit hit, the loan is in my name only and...
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likemyheart
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2
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456
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That dang hardware store USED to be a bread store!
(Preview)
I've been so proud of myself over the last few days; I've shaken off the negativity I had for weeks. I'm being much gentler with myself, and less judgmental of my AH. My worst time of day is always right now...I've been at work for a couple of hours, I know my AH is oversleeping and thus not taking care of th...
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stephaniej
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6
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397
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REALLY had to work my program over the past few days
(Preview)
We're in the process of moving. The new place is only about a mile away, but has about twice as much room as the old place, which will provide us all some much-needed personal space.
My AH has been drinking like it's his last day on the earth for the past week or so. All the work he said he would do last week f...
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stephaniej
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3
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271
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New to this and need some one to talk to
(Preview)
Hello, I am new to this type of group and just need someone that is dealing with the same things I am. I have a husband that is a drunk and I am having a hard time with it. He only drinks on weekends but is drunk from Friday until he goes to work on Monday. His drinking has gotten worse over the years and I just ca...
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phur
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12
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499
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"That's the way God planned it, that's the way God wants it to be..."
(Preview)
Some of the older folks may remember this song that Billy Preston put out in the 70's. I've been humming it a lot the last couple of weeks. A few weeks ago, there was a horrible accident in our area where a school bus collided with a dump truck, killing an 11 year old girl and critically injuring 3 other chil...
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usedtobeanyer
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7
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517
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Adult Children of A's being Angry at the Non Drinker
(Preview)
I hear it again and again. Now, my adult children in their 30's are even "angrier" towards me it seems, even though I have Always been open with them about their Dads addictions (etol and drugs), had them in alakid. One adult son texted me about his 3 yr old saying I called her an inappropriat...
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Grace7
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5
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471
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Wanting more from the Alcholic
(Preview)
Hello All, This is my second post in this forum. My ex-boyfriend of 2 and a half years is an alcoholic. We lived together for about year and broke up last October. It has been a tumultuos turning of events and I sought the help of Al anon and will be in the program for 5 months in March. I got a sponsor and I am wo...
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serenity84
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8
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5116
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Feeling alone..need reassurance
(Preview)
kids have been with their Dad since weds..I have a terrible cold...and then spent 1 1/2 hours this morning shoveling 8 inches of heavy snow..by myself...but I think my fever broke while I was out shoveling... though the snow was pretty, I was focused on this stuff in my head...why does no one ask ME if I n...
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rehprof
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9
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439
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can't always think of something to say, but I TALK anyway!
(Preview)
I seem to struggle w/ words these days but on here I can backspace & sometimes start all over again; what a priviledge to be on this wonderful site where I am accepted & loved! I feel like a blabber mouth but then my Ah reminds me that he too talks way too much & I lose what he says half the time. So...
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Hoot Nanny
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0
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299
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Thanks!
(Preview)
To those of you who were in the MIP chat room last night (you know who you are ), Thanks! As is usually the case, when we are hearing what we don't want to hear (but we already know), I got mad last night and left. But after sleeping on it, I know it's time for some "tough love" with my alcoholic. Bec...
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Overcome
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2
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364
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12th Step ~ sponsoring, etc
(Preview)
I'm new here - my sponsor just told me about this site. I just spent HOURS reading the many posts and I really wish I had known about this a couple years ago. my son (20yrs old) went to rehab last summer, had one brief relapse and is currently doing ok. Prior to last summer we went through hell. I'm su...
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connorsmommy
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2
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340
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I wish I had blinders on sometimes...
(Preview)
Hi family and friends, Sometimes, I wish I didn't see and hear some of the things I do. I wish I could ignore some of the insanity that alcoholISM brings to the table of life. But at the same time I'm glad I get to see it, and not be it. John
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John
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7
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329
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"This to shall past"
(Preview)
Some days are worst than others, I felt a little heavy hearted this morning when I got up. I stay in the grieving mode often because of my kids lifestyle and all the negative that goes with that. Not working, always broke. I let her clean for me weekly to help her out, she come over with 2 or 3 loads of clothes...
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Highlyfavored
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2
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385
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patience? rsvp
(Preview)
im finally after a long time feeling quite content with my life im making alot of changes in the right direction and growing as a person.the only thing thats missing is the relationship i wish to have with my recovering ah.i feel really good about myself,and really good about the person who he has grown...
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1 day at a time
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7
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603
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Why I feel the need to know. And why my A feels the need to keep it to herself.
(Preview)
Ok. Here is the question. I am in a 5 year relationship with my A. We have been riding the Alcoholic roller coaster for the last two hellashious years. She is just now starting to get serious. She has a good sponsor and she goes to meeting everyday. She was a year sober, but one day decided to drink again. Si...
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Hurtbeyondwords
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12
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7729
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drinking after rehab?
(Preview)
Was married to an alcholic who went to rehab a year ago is drinking again. We have 2 young children and are in the middle of a custody battle. He continues to drink when the children are there but states that he hasn't gotten drunk since rehab. Even while this is going on he and his girlfriend continue to d...
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Sara1976
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16
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6503
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I don't know if I'm being crazy...
(Preview)
The job I have now is my first "normal" (fulltime, in an office, etc.) job. My boss finds problems with everything I do, and is pretty harsh when he corrects me for them (Never just tells me what I did wrong, always throws in something like "I expect ____. If you don't like it, then this pr...
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atheos
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12
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571
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family group with daughter appropriate?
(Preview)
Hello, This is my first time here and I need some guidance. My husband is high functioning alcoholic. Our 20 yr old has always been bothered by her dad's drinking but is away at school now. Our 17 yr old who never seemed bothered about it came to me the other night to tell me how much it upsets her and had ev...
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10jq1830
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5
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371
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Personal Privacy in a relationship - thoughts on boundaries
(Preview)
I'd be interested in hearing others thoughts, experiences, perspectives on personal privacy in a relationship. I have come to learn that not everyone has the same view of this... As I've matured I've come to accept and value the need for personal privacy. I have times I just need to vent. I need to g...
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amills4294
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11
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632
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Don't Tell Me, Show Me
(Preview)
This one is a bit long, but I'm feeling a bit longwinded.When I fell in love with my wife Nancy, I forgot to ask her if she had children. Well, she had told me she was married twice before and I recall her mentioning she had a few sons and a few daughters but I naturally assumed they were all grown up, moved ou...
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Wolfie55
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8
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516
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First Al-Anon Meeting
(Preview)
I am going to attend my first al-anon meeting tonight. I am excited and scared all at the same time. I have been extremely depressed lately. I am hoping these meetings will help me out of this depression. I never really wanted to go to al-anon meetings, but I think I need them. This is not something I...
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ttpurtee
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11
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476
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emil feeling better and ready for the work
(Preview)
I went to my second therapy session and before I went in I thought "why am I here." After talking for a while I realized I am here- for me. I want to feel stronger for me. I know that I am often intiminated in many relatonships. When any type of conflict occurs I often pretend its not happen...
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emil
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4
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249
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He Left, Day 2
(Preview)
No, he didn't call...didn't text. And I honestly don't care. Grateful, actually. I worked from home today while my daughter & son played quietly in their rooms. I'M FREE!!!! My daughter & I had a slumber party last night...we all went toy shopping after work...and there was no negative jerk...
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Ariel
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6
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427
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Frusterated with the selfishness of alcoholism
(Preview)
Although I am content where I am, staying in one room at my parents is starting to get frusterating. There is no space to think, no room to move and living out of boxes isn't fun. Meanwhile the exAH is living in our house with 3 bedrooms and lots of space. He has still locked me out and I'm only allowed supe...
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TLD
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8
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1477
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What I still struggle with
(Preview)
I don't struggle to not drink so much, but I have gravitated over to Alanon quite a bit for 1 main reason lately. I can't change other people. How much does this suck? I thought a therapist was supposed to be able to do that and help people that way. Intellectually I know even therapist are only vehicles...
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pinkchip
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24
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671
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Sloganizing....
(Preview)
Practice, Practice, Practice...I wasn't standing still I was going crazy!! I wasn't doing anything and that was the problem I was just doing crazy or rather letting crazy do me. It happens and finally I got soooo sick and tired of being sick and tired I just went with sloganizing...thinking, feel...
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Jerry F
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7
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567
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Needing some help/guidance.
(Preview)
Hi guys and gals. I am new here, and I am seeking some guidance/help with some issues I am having with my SO in her recovery program. Obviously I do not want to air dirty laundry in a public place, so via PM's, and or phone would be best. I believe I have enough reasons to be worried, but would like unbiased co...
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happygolucky
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5
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348
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lcoholic at he bus stop
(Preview)
I have lived in a asmall part of Liverpool in Englad all my life. for a couple of years there has been a local alcoholic who is a nuisance but harless who lives on the streets so I thought. local people ive him clothes etc once a tent in the winter. I went to the bus stop before to go to my meeting, I have split...
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Tracy
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5
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417
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Well, He Left
(Preview)
My ABF quit drinking for a week and a half, and is still the same, mean person he ever was. He refused to go to AA. I was lifting heavy boxes for goodwill into my car & he walked right past me...twice. Then he huffed & puffed That Id asked for help. He asked me later 'what my problem was' & I calmy t...
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Ariel
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10
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447
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relief of control in alanon
(Preview)
I have been thinking lately about how before Alanon I had SO many self help books. I was constantly looking for serenity in those books and it left me with only despair and exhaustion. For awhile I was even trying to do affirmations and the law of attraction. If I would say an affirmation then I relly d...
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daisy31
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4
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305
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learning i dont have to be perfect.
(Preview)
well im finally learning i dont have to try to be perfect.when ive set myself up by trying to be perfect i only set myself up to fail and then feel bad when i can not reach that goal.now i will do the best and can do and that is easy.and if that is not good enough for someone else that is their problem.i will do my...
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1 day at a time
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4
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325
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Just Friends - An Al-Anon/AA Love Story
(Preview)
One of the many gifts I have received in my almost 12 years of sobriety is the work I was allowed to do at a local transition home for recovering alcoholics and addicts. I have no formal background or training in the field of alcoholism unless you count my 30 years field experience. I guess I just have a wa...
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Wolfie55
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7
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513
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it is getting easier...I guess!
(Preview)
It is getting easier to function these days w/o my dad & step-mom. I still want to pick up the phone & call them. I want to be there where they are sometimes too. I guess God has other plans for me to stick around & maybe touch another life. I often wonder what it would have been like if I could hav...
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Hoot Nanny
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3
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364
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Serenityville vs. Crazytown
(Preview)
As I've mentioned on this board many times, I left my AH in the spring of last year. We've been married for almost 30 years. I'm so much more at peace living in my simple one bedroom apartment, just two miles from work and walking distance to pretty much everywhere I want or need to go. I can sleep at night. I...
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Green Eyes
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11
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346
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Whackamole, Happy Birthday !!
(Preview)
Hey Whackamole............:) whats shakin girl ! Happy Happy Birthday !! Havent seen you for a while, hope your having a great day. May all your dreams come true in Extra Large :) Hope to see you soon........
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DreamXL
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2
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238
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In a GOOD place today
(Preview)
Woke up feeling so much better it wasn't funny. Im almost elated. I know I have to bring that down a bit and get more 'centred' Yesterday, after I had a realisation about the triggers and where that awful feeling came from..... I ate. and ate. and ate. well yo uget the picture. Mostly bad food. I gue...
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Oksie
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3
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213
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not in a good place today
(Preview)
HI guys It's me Linda. I know I said I wasn't going to post for a while, but I just can't help myself. Today.... I am not in a good place in my own head. I just need to write for a bit cos its hard to form the words in real speak. Today... I woke up hating every cell in my massive body. I did not want to wake up. I do...
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Oksie
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18
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548
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Need to hear Experience - Alcoholic daughter wants to move back
(Preview)
I have been going to Al Anon for about 1 year. Long story short : we have a beautiful, sweet alcoholic daughter who has been been in addiction half her life. Drugs at 15, stopped at 20 then picked up a bottle and has not put it down. I dont have to tell you what we have been through - we could have paid cash for an...
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LeenieBeanie
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5
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842
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just a moment to reflect...
(Preview)
Only have a few minutes so here it goes! I am feeling better. I am still growing! I am still changing--I will never be perfect. The only thing constant is change. I hope I am not the same person this time next year. I hope that the truth will set me free. I hope you all will feel a sense of growth in me. I don't fe...
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Hoot Nanny
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1
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258
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Just a few random thoughts I have...
(Preview)
Just a few things I am loving about alanon today...... People look happy to see me at the meetings (which is new to me!) :) They like to give hugs and it feels safe to do so. People are authentic and open about their issues People like to get together afterwards just to hang out at a restaurant and everyone i...
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daisy31
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5
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337
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Al-ateen Sponsors
(Preview)
I originally posted this on another board. Maybe it may be more appropriate for on here. Hi,I was wondering if you could help me.Are people who go to aa allowed to be sponsors for al-ateen? I have an issue with a male who sponsors our children's al-ateen group. He has made inappropriate comments...
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Tracey C
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4
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405
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A Cat Story
(Preview)
For the benefit of those of you who don't know me very well, I've been coming to MIP on and off since 2005. I'm what is known in program lingo as a double winner, meaning I am in both Al-Anon and AA. I only mention that in case there are newcomers in here who may be confused by my outgoing outspoken and often ou...
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Wolfie55
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9
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439
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ESH appreciated for how to handle this?
(Preview)
My AH sat next to me on the couch tonight and cried. He cried because he can't stop and doesn't know how and doesn't know what to do. This is not the first time this conversation has been had. Tonight he was asking me to help him find a 3 day detox program because he can't do this on his own and doesn't believe j...
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Jackie11
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13
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563
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Just the Effects ...
(Preview)
I've been Really looking at my past however many years .. One of Alanon's Promises is that we will learn to perceive Reality .. I survived alcoholism by fantasizing in a denialish sort of way .. copied behaviors by telling myself it wasn't this way or that way .. seeing the cycle and how it passed down to m...
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MeTwo2
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9
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448
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Addiction is Not Hopeless
(Preview)
http://www.cnn.com/2012/02/22/opinion/brooks-addiction-problem/index.html?hpt=hp_t3
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Green Eyes
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4
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5524
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Releasing my anger
(Preview)
I'm still angry about the fallout from my AH's DUI from last Thursday. I can't seem to shake it. I am withholding affection from him, being curt and short with my words, and I am keeping my distance. We've had a few good talks this week and he's doing a great job in taking care of his side of the street rig...
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ilovedogs
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10
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742
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wreck of a day: when to interfere?
(Preview)
I have two things on my mind today. They are seeming so big right now that I feel like my world is caving in. I tried to remember some slogins to help me relax. I had to think hard to pull a few out but I'm now trying to rememember that this too shall pass..... But in the meantime I need to tell someone what's goi...
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respect
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12
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646
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Help: Postponing a Wedding
(Preview)
Hey everyone I am new to this message board, but hopefully this is somewhere I can get some advice. I am engaged to be married to an alcoholic. I know whole heartedly that he's an alcoholic, but I'm not sure he's ready to admit it. Right now he is in a detox center withdrawing from alcohol. This is the fir...
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Giggly423
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15
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567
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