Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

need lots of help · need lots of help

So AH had a heat stroke yesterday and had to be taken to the ER. While there they did blood tests and found out that it seems like he has "renal insuffency". They highly recommended that he see a doctor immediately. So he says he wants to go next week, let's see. I guess it was a blessing that...

Northof60 · Northof60

I have been married to my AH for 14 years. He was a heavy drinker when I met him but so was I back then. We had fun and that was all that mattered. Nothing seemed out of control. I always had issues with his communication skills - or lack of them. He would appear paranoid about somebody and then obsess for week...

never going back · never going back

Well, it's been a chaotic time for the past couple of weeks but for once, it's NOT due to my AH! He is in his 3rd week of not drinking, going to meetings every night, and just generally being the wonderful person that he is when he is sober. It's a good thing, because with everything else I've been going thro...

Sansui1210 · Sansui1210

A person dear to me introduced me to this website recently. What a blessing! In the short time I have been lurking I have learned so much. I can relate to some stories. I cried for the first time. It felt good, so I cried some more. The hardest part for me is the first step. "We admitted we were pow...

John · John

From me to many of you, (those who wrote and those who simply read, and most important those who prayed) To each and every person who responded to my post about the young man who died last week and was buried this weekend, my heart embraced every word you shared with me. Intellecutally, I already knew wh...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I need to apologize for yesterday to my husband of almost 11 years! Yesterday I was awful & kept calling him a MORON for pretty much nothing; although I have to admit he was acting kinda stupid! I really just called him a moron under my breath; basically to myself. What's up with that? I didn't even ac...

goincrazyinky · goincrazyinky

My daughter is a drug addict, 40 yrs old. Her 3 sons, ages 18, 19, and 20 are pot addicts. Five years ago, our daughter started drugs, lost her good job, lost her home, her vehicle. Her 3 sons got hooked on pot to deal with living with her actions. For about a year, she went to a housing project with her b...

punkydoodah · punkydoodah

She has never been a very stable human being, but now, after almost a year of sneaking around trying to see this boy (who spends his free time in juvenile hall), she has still not stopped lying to me. She's always been silly, vulnerable, gullible and deceptive, manipulative to get what she wants. I am ca...

helpme08 · helpme08

So my AH does not care that he is a Type 1 diabetic and continues to drink and thinks that he can hide it! He is so mean when he drinks. I love him to death when he has not had a drop. Because of financial reasons, I cannot leave. We have a 7 year old son that means the world to us. But my AH forgets how much o...

barisax · barisax

On the day of my divorce court hearing, I decided to go alone. I had a few offers of support, but something told me I needed to go do this alone. My marriage had been one without much of a social life and I thought that in it's finality, I should be reminded of that fact. When I got there, wife was there with...

RoseODAT · RoseODAT

My husband will not move out because according to him "he has no place to go". I feel the kids and I should NOT be the ones leaving especially since it's stress on the kids. Him living in this house is already stressful enough. It's dumb that I have to put up with his behavior instead of my lit...

Katy · Katy

But how then can we do that, well for me it happened when you get sick and tired of being sick and tired, first of all you need a huge dose of acceptence of what is and not what you would like it to be, my a will not hug me or see my pain, he doesn't with anyone he is very closed, I did take it personally untill I lear...

barisax · barisax

How many of you remember that year? Wow. It's probably the most significant year in my entire life and boy do I remember it. Everything in my childhood can be divided into pre and post-1968. How I perceive things changed forever. I thought I was growing up, and maybe in some ways I was, but I was also...

kerry5 · kerry5

Next meeting will be first Sunday of the Month in August. If you have anything that you would like added to the agenda please let me know thank you. Kerry aka kerisha

Christie92 · Christie92

So much to say...don't know where to start. I'll just say that I'm not even sure my son is an alcoholic, but if he isn't, he might be on his way. I don't know if he's just doing the "teenage" thing...or if he's really addicted to alcohol. Lets just put it this way. He is very open about "l...

DreamsOver · DreamsOver

I will miss coming here and being with those that understand the pain of addiction in the people we love. I need to be with my husband and my youngest son (age 17 with Autism). I have put boundries up with my AS (age 30) that I have never done before, he may have to live on the streets before he hits his bottom...

buick23 · buick23

A few days ago my bf told me working on cars is like an addiction but so much better than drinking. Isn't that cool? He hasn't drank in years and finally found something he really loves to do. buick

nmike · nmike

I finished my 4th step inventory awhile back. I didn't quite know how to make an amends. The two people whom I have terrible relationships with are my mother and my AHsober (who left). How could I make an amends when I blame them for all my troubles. I have been staying with my mother short term while I work...

okwitt · okwitt

If anyone remembers me...no I can't go f2f meetings..it would be 150 mile round trip. Adult son who is my a is still waiting for a bed. By the way.. he is going to a recovery house for 30 days. They use the 12 steps. But they also use R.o.p.e.s program. Does anyone know about the ropes? My A son is still livi...

Jennifer · Jennifer

My xah has let me know he is in an intensive treatment facility, a requirement of his prison sentence or an early release program I imagine. I feel ashamed after reading his letter notifying me of a change of address that I felt no hope, my only real thought was ... ahhh gonna spend another 6 months or so p...

imwithstupid · imwithstupid

I am new here and have read several other posts and of course the similarities to my situation haven't gone unnoticed. I am sick thinking of the over 20 years I have wasted with my compulsive gambling/alcoholic third husband. Since I am an addict magnet, the other two weren't much better. I thou...

Katy · Katy

Pheeeeeeeweeeeeee, just back from second interview of the week, two jobs plucked out of thin air and two jobs on offer to me,wow what a turn around, it's very hard to try and do something differently, and you wonder how can I? In the situations here we find ourselves in we think and project the outcome wi...

minawillie · minawillie

Hello everyone, I posted a few day's ago about the death of my mother. She was found dead in her house last Wednesday & was estimated by the medical examiner to have been dead for at least a week. The poor woman was so enslaved by the bottle that she had lost nearly everyone who loved her. My sister h...

david62 · david62

Had a few people asking me to repost this story so here ya go! I had been coming to Al-anon meetings six months at the time my wife and I separated and she filed for a divorce. It was the lowest point of my life. My wife had been going to AA for over a year, and though I had hoped that we would be able to heal togeth...

Nalina · Nalina

I can't believe I didn't go sooner. It seems that sometimes WE have to hit OUR personal bottom to seek out real-live help just like the A does? There was plenty of opportunity for me to go before I left, but the meeting I was interested in was Saturday mornings..and I wanted to sleep in on Saturday morning...

rpendler · rpendler

New to all this, wife has been an alcoholi since I have know her. Wouldn't admit it until she entered rehap and now has been sober for 30 days, but I don't know how to cope with the resement I have. She has put us in financial distress, 15 hours of jail time for me, and countless hrs of misery for both of us....

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I promise this will be brief! I am still struggling but feel much better. Still thinking about BR & have brought it up to those who I feel need to know. sleep is getting better, time is still going slow. Not afraid to be me today. have some reservations though. did stupid things last week. don't know...

Katy · Katy

Don't they? One of the most damaging aspects of living with an alcoholic is they say one thing and do another, the insanity for me was that I had my head screwed trusting the spoken word, lol and then I just thought lol I did just the same, I said I am not doing this anymore or that, and the best one, this is you...

Ness · Ness

''Its like re-arranging the deckchairs on the Titanic''BRILLIANT......Someone said this in response to a post a couple of days ago, might have been Rocky? but I cant find it again. That saying has stayed in my head..... what a brilliant analogy and a great reminder to me to remember to let go...........

Jennifer · Jennifer

Brief backhround, 1st boyfriend at 14 stayed involved thru controlling abusiveness until I was 20 along with the beginning signs of his addictions which came later and I have been witness to by being his friend still. Three dates with 3 people and involved with my ex husband, an A and addict, stayed th...

zhotdogs99 · zhotdogs99

I left my AF yesterday. I called my parents and asked the question I knew I'd have to ask eventually: "Will you guys come pick me up?" Lucky for me I have great parents who are able to drop everything, rent a U-Haul, and drive 10 hours to come rescue their 26 year old daughter. It was hard, it w...

Nalina · Nalina

It's been a difficult time having left my ABF & our apartment (with only a suitcase) & now being 600 miles away. I have lost my job because of the chaos surrounding the alcohol consumption. Moving forward: I am going to my first face to face meeting tomorrow and I am actually looking forward to i...

mon123 · mon123

Question I have the Paths to recovery book which has the concepts in. I am struggling to understand it and relate it to traditions etc. I wondered if anyone knows of a good study guide or some simple tips. I've only just started to get to grips with the traditions. Any suggestions would be gratefully rec...

Adabnu · Adabnu

I broke up with my alcoholic finacee after he did not deal with his drinking problem seriously enough. When I walked away from him, I was so happy for myself to be able to have the guts to do it, I felt sense of freedom, I felt that I no longer need to babysit a drunk, how wonderful.... It has been a month now si...

Katy · Katy

Well I set the wheels in motion to disolve our marriage, all the stomach churning feelings of fear about where will I live, how will our children take it, how will I financially manage, what will our family think what will my friends think, all these feelings that over whelmed me and kept me stuck and unh...

New Member · sharonsue

Hi, I just took a big step by signing up today. My life as been affected by alcholism since I was born. My dad was an abusive drinker, who never dealt with his disease. He died at 49 from the effects of hard living. My first husband is an alcoholic who continues to drink, altho he says it's okay, ' cause its...

alanonicScotland · alanonicScotland

I've participated in a couple of shares, and my posts seem to have now disappeared. Anyone know what may have happened?

miss_carol · miss_carol

I was talking with my husband and he told me he is so jealous and insecure it is consuming him. He wants us to go to counseling for this. (could this open up the no talk rule about his choices?? Probably not, but who knows what my HP has planned)This is a recent development. It maybe due to my detachment. He t...

Goodtillitsbad · Goodtillitsbad

While I was driving to work I realized that I'm afraid to file for divorce from my AH because I'm afraid to leave HIM alone. WOW This realization came when I was saying the serenity prayer and mediating. TY, HP.

maresie · maresie

During all my time with the exA I dreaded holidays. I felt left out, abandoned and neglected. I did not have the tools then to simply take care of myself. This July 4th I had a simple peaceful time. One reason was that the roommate who has the worst alcohol problem has disappeared. Normally I would tak...

Katy · Katy

Change to the fearful is threatening because it might mean that things get worse, to the hopeful, change is encouraging because things might get BETTER, to the confident change is inspiring because the challenge exsists to make things BETTER! Freedom to? Freedom of Freedom for Katyx

abbyal · abbyal

If a newcommer is confused about how our program can help - our WSO site has on its home page a section that is called pod casts , simply click on it and u can listen to members share on different topics . costs nothing but a little time.. As an old timmer I really enjoyed listening too .

Andrea12 · Andrea12

(((((((((Friends)))))))))))), My wonderful son of 18 wants to join the marines....,now I know this is an honorable thing..however he is my baby yes I know he is becoming a grown man and honestly it may be the best thing for him. I however will miss him so very much, he is my sanity, my friend and i love him...

minawillie · minawillie

Hello everyone. I am new to this group but by no means new to the disease that affects us all so horribly. I've just lost my mother to this horrendous thing we call alcoholism. My dad found her body this past Wednesday. She'd been dead at least a week according to the medical examiner. She died like s...

Rocky38 · Rocky38

Hi MIP family, It's been a long time since I posted or replied here so I thought I'd stop by and let you all know I'm doing ok. It's now almost 6 months since my AH passed away, and I honestly can't believe it's that long. So what have I been doing? I've been spending a lot of time reading about grief, partici...

alanonicScotland · alanonicScotland

It's been a while since I've been on here - I'm sharing for the health of it... My Alanonic Grandmother just passed away at 92 and I am working through a bunch of conflicting feelings. Boy, was she a RAGE-aholic. The dynamic of my granfather drinking and her being bossy Baptist housewife was heavy-duty...

GailMichelle · GailMichelle

Ran across this today and thought I'd share it: Fear less, hope more; eat less, chew more; whine less, breathe more, hate less, love more. Nice little reminder, no?

Aloha · Aloha

For a long time, before Al-Anon, I would often find myself in situations where I'd feel emotionally awful. When those feelings would emerge, I'd get mad and impatient with myself and try to find something - anything - to distract me so I wouldn't feel that way any longer. I would continue to feel "...

david62 · david62

Hi Family!! I just got back home from spending the weekend in San Antonio at the 2010 AA International Conference. A - Maz - ing!!!! This was my first one, and I hope it will not be my last! I was absolutely overwelmed by the number of people walking around downtown San Antonio wearing the conference bad...

Nalina · Nalina

This is only the second post from me, but I am curious as to what anyone's thoughts may be for me? MY AH and I have history spanning entire lives/love each other very much/want to get married/I moved 600 miles in January for him/he is showing signs of violent temper and angry drunk/his mother died last ye...

Bettina · Bettina

Hi everyone, I know my question is not alcohol related but I was hoping that someone could give me insight into an issue with my Mother that has become increasingly a problem. My Mother will be 85 in October, I know that she is getting old, and losing her memoryI have always worked to be respectful of m...

Tattyhead · Tattyhead

First Happy 4 July to my US MIP family. Wishing you all a great day. I just wish I could say everything is going well in the Tattyhead household. AH is very ill and is in hospital having had upset stomach and not having eaten anything solid since April. He is skin and bone, having lost 3 1/2 stone (49lb) s...

Megthompson · Megthompson

hi anyone i am brand new to this site. also brand new to al anon.i have been trying to get to an on line al anon meeting but my computer is not really co-operating.i have been married to a heavy drinker for 20 years and just separated in february 2010. i have 3 children 2 of whom are drinking heavily.i just ca...

petpal · petpal

Hi everyone, where do I start. My husband has been to 3 detox therapies over the years and is still drinking. He goes to meetings for a while and falls. And I get really upset and I m the one who looks like a fool, in all of this, just doesn`t seem to make any sense. Hes the one drinking and doing all sorts of s...

angelchar375 · angelchar375

I'm so anxious this morning. Things are going smoothely at home. The kids are being fun and helpful and not getting on my nerves. But I have this looming anxious feeling. My mother in law is coming in to town. I haven' seen her since last summer. She was not always friendly to me and is very much an untreate...

DreamsOver · DreamsOver

I kicked my son out of my mother's house (she passed away three years ago) three weeks ago today, it was a terrible scene with him and his friend both of them high and out of control screaming and cussing, the police tried to keep the situation in a negotiated mode, but it ended with my son being arrested...

Rebecca2019 · Rebecca2019

I'd rather not get into the whole background. I am here due to my fiance being an A. He is not abusive, just rather sloppy and tired. More of a 'happy' drunk as me and my therapist calls him. Anyway she has suggested Al-Anon and I have a print out of some meetings. I realize I am enabling him. I made a set...

MissyPoo · MissyPoo

Hello all.. haven't posted in a while but have been lurking. All is as well as can be with an A who is trying to control his drinking. I detach, detach, detach and basically remove myself (and the kids) from his presence when he is drinking. Not too hard when we are at home, because he does most of his d...

Katy · Katy

Well I have detached from hubby emotionally and physically, the merry go round was making me sick so I got off, we have both played the games, and I have sat on my pity pot telling him over and over why he should change because of the things I have done and continue to do, I mean who else would put up with all th...

abbyal · abbyal

I was remembering a tape I heard several yrs ago , after reading katy 's post this morning , way to go keeping a positive attitude .. A farmer had a load of manure delivered to his home , he asked his two sons to move it to another location , the pesimist took one look at it and said no way and walked away , the opt...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Found out AH has kidney issues (Preview) So AH had a heat stroke yesterday and had to be taken to the ER. While there they did blood tests and found out that it seems like he has "renal insuffency". They highly recommended that he see a doctor immediately. So he says he wants to go next week, let's see. I guess it was a blessing that...	need lots of help	5	759	Jul 13, 2010 by maresie
	New here - Introduction (Preview) I have been married to my AH for 14 years. He was a heavy drinker when I met him but so was I back then. We had fun and that was all that mattered. Nothing seemed out of control. I always had issues with his communication skills - or lack of them. He would appear paranoid about somebody and then obsess for week...	Northof60	5	820	Jul 13, 2010 by Northof60
	for once my AH is NOT the problem! (Preview) Well, it's been a chaotic time for the past couple of weeks but for once, it's NOT due to my AH! He is in his 3rd week of not drinking, going to meetings every night, and just generally being the wonderful person that he is when he is sober. It's a good thing, because with everything else I've been going thro...	never going back	11	822	Jul 13, 2010 by hopeforme
	My Confession (Preview) A person dear to me introduced me to this website recently. What a blessing! In the short time I have been lurking I have learned so much. I can relate to some stories. I cried for the first time. It felt good, so I cried some more. The hardest part for me is the first step. "We admitted we were pow...	Sansui1210	5	840	Jul 13, 2010 by xeno59
	A Special "THANK YOU" (Preview) From me to many of you, (those who wrote and those who simply read, and most important those who prayed) To each and every person who responded to my post about the young man who died last week and was buried this weekend, my heart embraced every word you shared with me. Intellecutally, I already knew wh...	John	7	1201	Jul 13, 2010 by xeno59
	I need to apologize... (Preview) I need to apologize for yesterday to my husband of almost 11 years! Yesterday I was awful & kept calling him a MORON for pretty much nothing; although I have to admit he was acting kinda stupid! I really just called him a moron under my breath; basically to myself. What's up with that? I didn't even ac...	Hoot Nanny	3	1283	Jul 13, 2010 by xeno59
	ADULT DAUGHTER AND 3 ADULT GRANDCHILDREN BANKRUPTING US (Preview) My daughter is a drug addict, 40 yrs old. Her 3 sons, ages 18, 19, and 20 are pot addicts. Five years ago, our daughter started drugs, lost her good job, lost her home, her vehicle. Her 3 sons got hooked on pot to deal with living with her actions. For about a year, she went to a housing project with her b...	goincrazyinky	9	1004	Jul 13, 2010 by Sweet Stanley
	I am being manipulated by my 15-year-old daughter... daughter teenager pot lies manipulative (Preview) She has never been a very stable human being, but now, after almost a year of sneaking around trying to see this boy (who spends his free time in juvenile hall), she has still not stopped lying to me. She's always been silly, vulnerable, gullible and deceptive, manipulative to get what she wants. I am ca...	punkydoodah	6	8002	Jul 12, 2010 by punkydoodah
	Looking for support (Preview) So my AH does not care that he is a Type 1 diabetic and continues to drink and thinks that he can hide it! He is so mean when he drinks. I love him to death when he has not had a drop. Because of financial reasons, I cannot leave. We have a 7 year old son that means the world to us. But my AH forgets how much o...	helpme08	7	646	Jul 12, 2010 by Northof60
	The Discommodation (Preview) On the day of my divorce court hearing, I decided to go alone. I had a few offers of support, but something told me I needed to go do this alone. My marriage had been one without much of a social life and I thought that in it's finality, I should be reminded of that fact. When I got there, wife was there with...	barisax	4	990	Jul 12, 2010 by barisax
	just venting..... (Preview) My husband will not move out because according to him "he has no place to go". I feel the kids and I should NOT be the ones leaving especially since it's stress on the kids. Him living in this house is already stressful enough. It's dumb that I have to put up with his behavior instead of my lit...	RoseODAT	7	822	Jul 12, 2010 by lyndebi
	Problems cannot be solved by the same level of thinking that created them! (Preview) But how then can we do that, well for me it happened when you get sick and tired of being sick and tired, first of all you need a huge dose of acceptence of what is and not what you would like it to be, my a will not hug me or see my pain, he doesn't with anyone he is very closed, I did take it personally untill I lear...	Katy	5	3804	Jul 12, 2010 by pineapple
	1968 (Preview) How many of you remember that year? Wow. It's probably the most significant year in my entire life and boy do I remember it. Everything in my childhood can be divided into pre and post-1968. How I perceive things changed forever. I thought I was growing up, and maybe in some ways I was, but I was also...	barisax	6	1131	Jul 11, 2010 by ythannah
	Business meeting for July 11 2010 has been canceled (Preview) Next meeting will be first Sunday of the Month in August. If you have anything that you would like added to the agenda please let me know thank you. Kerry aka kerisha	kerry5	0	352	Jul 11, 2010 by kerry5
	My 17 year old son (Preview) So much to say...don't know where to start. I'll just say that I'm not even sure my son is an alcoholic, but if he isn't, he might be on his way. I don't know if he's just doing the "teenage" thing...or if he's really addicted to alcohol. Lets just put it this way. He is very open about "l...	Christie92	14	968	Jul 11, 2010 by Christie92
	Going To Be Away For A Few Days...... (Preview) I will miss coming here and being with those that understand the pain of addiction in the people we love. I need to be with my husband and my youngest son (age 17 with Autism). I have put boundries up with my AS (age 30) that I have never done before, he may have to live on the streets before he hits his bottom...	DreamsOver	3	467	Jul 11, 2010 by Karilynn
	addiction (Preview) A few days ago my bf told me working on cars is like an addiction but so much better than drinking. Isn't that cool? He hasn't drank in years and finally found something he really loves to do. buick	buick23	3	525	Jul 11, 2010 by xeno59
	Made an amends (Preview) I finished my 4th step inventory awhile back. I didn't quite know how to make an amends. The two people whom I have terrible relationships with are my mother and my AHsober (who left). How could I make an amends when I blame them for all my troubles. I have been staying with my mother short term while I work...	nmike	5	817	Jul 11, 2010 by xeno59
	Everything is going slow (Preview) If anyone remembers me...no I can't go f2f meetings..it would be 150 mile round trip. Adult son who is my a is still waiting for a bed. By the way.. he is going to a recovery house for 30 days. They use the 12 steps. But they also use R.o.p.e.s program. Does anyone know about the ropes? My A son is still livi...	okwitt	3	500	Jul 11, 2010 by Jennifer
	Shaking the dust off my slogans (Preview) My xah has let me know he is in an intensive treatment facility, a requirement of his prison sentence or an early release program I imagine. I feel ashamed after reading his letter notifying me of a change of address that I felt no hope, my only real thought was ... ahhh gonna spend another 6 months or so p...	Jennifer	3	903	Jul 11, 2010 by canadianguy
	I am going to go stark, raving mad before this is over with . . . Long (Preview) I am new here and have read several other posts and of course the similarities to my situation haven't gone unnoticed. I am sick thinking of the over 20 years I have wasted with my compulsive gambling/alcoholic third husband. Since I am an addict magnet, the other two weren't much better. I thou...	imwithstupid	14	1196	Jul 10, 2010 by buick23
	Taking that leap of faith! (Preview) Pheeeeeeeweeeeeee, just back from second interview of the week, two jobs plucked out of thin air and two jobs on offer to me,wow what a turn around, it's very hard to try and do something differently, and you wonder how can I? In the situations here we find ourselves in we think and project the outcome wi...	Katy	5	837	Jul 10, 2010 by punkydoodah
	Feeling that it was my fault... (Preview) Hello everyone, I posted a few day's ago about the death of my mother. She was found dead in her house last Wednesday & was estimated by the medical examiner to have been dead for at least a week. The poor woman was so enslaved by the bottle that she had lost nearly everyone who loved her. My sister h...	minawillie	9	1174	Jul 10, 2010 by minawillie
	Back by popular demand...."The Screw" (Preview) Had a few people asking me to repost this story so here ya go! I had been coming to Al-anon meetings six months at the time my wife and I separated and she filed for a divorce. It was the lowest point of my life. My wife had been going to AA for over a year, and though I had hoped that we would be able to heal togeth...	david62	13	1079	Jul 10, 2010 by Rocky38
	My First F2F Meeting (Preview) I can't believe I didn't go sooner. It seems that sometimes WE have to hit OUR personal bottom to seek out real-live help just like the A does? There was plenty of opportunity for me to go before I left, but the meeting I was interested in was Saturday mornings..and I wanted to sleep in on Saturday morning...	Nalina	5	662	Jul 10, 2010 by Rocky38
	Help (Preview) New to all this, wife has been an alcoholi since I have know her. Wouldn't admit it until she entered rehap and now has been sober for 30 days, but I don't know how to cope with the resement I have. She has put us in financial distress, 15 hours of jail time for me, and countless hrs of misery for both of us....	rpendler	13	1299	Jul 10, 2010 by never going back
	I PROMISE IT WILL BE BRIEF... (Preview) I promise this will be brief! I am still struggling but feel much better. Still thinking about BR & have brought it up to those who I feel need to know. sleep is getting better, time is still going slow. Not afraid to be me today. have some reservations though. did stupid things last week. don't know...	Hoot Nanny	1	712	Jul 9, 2010 by Jerry F
	Actions speak louder than words! (Preview) Don't they? One of the most damaging aspects of living with an alcoholic is they say one thing and do another, the insanity for me was that I had my head screwed trusting the spoken word, lol and then I just thought lol I did just the same, I said I am not doing this anymore or that, and the best one, this is you...	Katy	1	629	Jul 9, 2010 by Jennifer
	It’s like re-arranging the deckchairs on the Titanic! (Preview) *''Its like re-arranging the deckchairs on the Titanic''*BRILLIANT......Someone said this in response to a post a couple of days ago, might have been Rocky? but I cant find it again. That saying has stayed in my head..... what a brilliant analogy and a great reminder to me to remember to let go...........	Ness	4	732	Jul 9, 2010 by Ness
	Struggling with self realization and a need for my own kind of fix (Preview) Brief backhround, 1st boyfriend at 14 stayed involved thru controlling abusiveness until I was 20 along with the beginning signs of his addictions which came later and I have been witness to by being his friend still. Three dates with 3 people and involved with my ex husband, an A and addict, stayed th...	Jennifer	6	620	Jul 8, 2010 by Jennifer
	I Left Him.... How long should I wait for him to be sober? (Preview) I left my AF yesterday. I called my parents and asked the question I knew I'd have to ask eventually: "Will you guys come pick me up?" Lucky for me I have great parents who are able to drop everything, rent a U-Haul, and drive 10 hours to come rescue their 26 year old daughter. It was hard, it w...	zhotdogs99	15	1201	Jul 8, 2010 by Adabnu
	Forward thinking and confusion combined (Preview) It's been a difficult time having left my ABF & our apartment (with only a suitcase) & now being 600 miles away. I have lost my job because of the chaos surrounding the alcohol consumption. Moving forward: I am going to my first face to face meeting tomorrow and I am actually looking forward to i...	Nalina	9	905	Jul 8, 2010 by nmike
	Concepts (Preview) Question I have the Paths to recovery book which has the concepts in. I am struggling to understand it and relate it to traditions etc. I wondered if anyone knows of a good study guide or some simple tips. I've only just started to get to grips with the traditions. Any suggestions would be gratefully rec...	mon123	6	749	Jul 8, 2010 by mon123
	I need help for dealing with my break up with an alcoholic partner (Preview) I broke up with my alcoholic finacee after he did not deal with his drinking problem seriously enough. When I walked away from him, I was so happy for myself to be able to have the guts to do it, I felt sense of freedom, I felt that I no longer need to babysit a drunk, how wonderful.... It has been a month now si...	Adabnu	9	6505	Jul 8, 2010 by Adabnu
	Later this day! (Preview) Well I set the wheels in motion to disolve our marriage, all the stomach churning feelings of fear about where will I live, how will our children take it, how will I financially manage, what will our family think what will my friends think, all these feelings that over whelmed me and kept me stuck and unh...	Katy	5	898	Jul 7, 2010 by Rocky38
	New Member (Preview) Hi, I just took a big step by signing up today. My life as been affected by alcholism since I was born. My dad was an abusive drinker, who never dealt with his disease. He died at 49 from the effects of hard living. My first husband is an alcoholic who continues to drink, altho he says it's okay, ' cause its...	sharonsue	8	991	Jul 7, 2010 by sharonsue
	Deleting posts? (Preview) I've participated in a couple of shares, and my posts seem to have now disappeared. Anyone know what may have happened?	alanonicScotland	4	659	Jul 7, 2010 by abbyal
	Hubby supports alanon and wants counseling. (Preview) I was talking with my husband and he told me he is so jealous and insecure it is consuming him. He wants us to go to counseling for this. (could this open up the no talk rule about his choices?? Probably not, but who knows what my HP has planned)This is a recent development. It maybe due to my detachment. He t...	miss_carol	4	821	Jul 7, 2010 by canadianguy
	This morning (Preview) While I was driving to work I realized that I'm afraid to file for divorce from my AH because I'm afraid to leave HIM alone. WOW This realization came when I was saying the serenity prayer and mediating. TY, HP.	Goodtillitsbad	5	741	Jul 7, 2010 by Bettina
	holidays (Preview) During all my time with the exA I dreaded holidays. I felt left out, abandoned and neglected. I did not have the tools then to simply take care of myself. This July 4th I had a simple peaceful time. One reason was that the roommate who has the worst alcohol problem has disappeared. Normally I would tak...	maresie	5	842	Jul 7, 2010 by maresie
	CHANGE! (Preview) Change to the fearful is threatening because it might mean that things get worse, to the hopeful, change is encouraging because things might get BETTER, to the confident change is inspiring because the challenge exsists to make things BETTER! Freedom to? Freedom of Freedom for Katyx	Katy	1	723	Jul 7, 2010 by nmike
	Al-Anon pod casts (Preview) If a newcommer is confused about how our program can help - our WSO site has on its home page a section that is called pod casts , simply click on it and u can listen to members share on different topics . costs nothing but a little time.. As an old timmer I really enjoyed listening too .	abbyal	4	1052	Jul 7, 2010 by alanonicScotland
	My Son wants to join the marines (Preview) (((((((((Friends)))))))))))), My wonderful son of 18 wants to join the marines....,now I know this is an honorable thing..however he is my baby yes I know he is becoming a grown man and honestly it may be the best thing for him. I however will miss him so very much, he is my sanity, my friend and i love him...	Andrea12	8	1628	Jul 7, 2010 by Diva
	I am in hell and don't know if I'll ever come out (Preview) Hello everyone. I am new to this group but by no means new to the disease that affects us all so horribly. I've just lost my mother to this horrendous thing we call alcoholism. My dad found her body this past Wednesday. She'd been dead at least a week according to the medical examiner. She died like s...	minawillie	19	1168	Jul 6, 2010 by minawillie
	Update on Rocky (Preview) Hi MIP family, It's been a long time since I posted or replied here so I thought I'd stop by and let you all know I'm doing ok. It's now almost 6 months since my AH passed away, and I honestly can't believe it's that long. So what have I been doing? I've been spending a lot of time reading about grief, partici...	Rocky38	7	796	Jul 6, 2010 by minawillie
	Qualifier Grandmother just passed away (Preview) It's been a while since I've been on here - I'm sharing for the health of it... My Alanonic Grandmother just passed away at 92 and I am working through a bunch of conflicting feelings. Boy, was she a RAGE-aholic. The dynamic of my granfather drinking and her being bossy Baptist housewife was heavy-duty...	alanonicScotland	5	798	Jul 6, 2010 by Carol_Lynn
	Less is More (Preview) Ran across this today and thought I'd share it: Fear less, hope more; eat less, chew more; whine less, breathe more, hate less, love more. Nice little reminder, no?	GailMichelle	6	727	Jul 6, 2010 by Carol_Lynn
	Allowing my feelings their time (Preview) For a long time, before Al-Anon, I would often find myself in situations where I'd feel emotionally awful. When those feelings would emerge, I'd get mad and impatient with myself and try to find something - anything - to distract me so I wouldn't feel that way any longer. I would continue to feel "...	Aloha	5	777	Jul 6, 2010 by Carol_Lynn
	Home from the International (Preview) Hi Family!! I just got back home from spending the weekend in San Antonio at the 2010 AA International Conference. A - Maz - ing!!!! This was my first one, and I hope it will not be my last! I was absolutely overwelmed by the number of people walking around downtown San Antonio wearing the conference bad...	david62	10	1432	Jul 6, 2010 by Aloha
	Things are becoming more volitile (Preview) This is only the second post from me, but I am curious as to what anyone's thoughts may be for me? MY AH and I have history spanning entire lives/love each other very much/want to get married/I moved 600 miles in January for him/he is showing signs of violent temper and angry drunk/his mother died last ye...	Nalina	9	1099	Jul 6, 2010 by Aloha
	Perplexed and at a loss... (Preview) Hi everyone, I know my question is not alcohol related but I was hoping that someone could give me insight into an issue with my Mother that has become increasingly a problem. My Mother will be 85 in October, I know that she is getting old, and losing her memoryI have always worked to be respectful of m...	Bettina	16	978	Jul 6, 2010 by Bettina
	Me again (Preview) First Happy 4 July to my US MIP family. Wishing you all a great day. I just wish I could say everything is going well in the Tattyhead household. AH is very ill and is in hospital having had upset stomach and not having eaten anything solid since April. He is skin and bone, having lost 3 1/2 stone (49lb) s...	Tattyhead	8	1013	Jul 6, 2010 by maresie
	BRAND NEW (Preview) hi anyone i am brand new to this site. also brand new to al anon.i have been trying to get to an on line al anon meeting but my computer is not really co-operating.i have been married to a heavy drinker for 20 years and just separated in february 2010. i have 3 children 2 of whom are drinking heavily.i just ca...	Megthompson	8	890	Jul 6, 2010 by maresie
	Where do I start!!!!! (Preview) Hi everyone, where do I start. My husband has been to 3 detox therapies over the years and is still drinking. He goes to meetings for a while and falls. And I get really upset and I m the one who looks like a fool, in all of this, just doesn`t seem to make any sense. Hes the one drinking and doing all sorts of s...	petpal	7	968	Jul 6, 2010 by maresie
	Happy 4th of July, or is it? (Preview) I'm so anxious this morning. Things are going smoothely at home. The kids are being fun and helpful and not getting on my nerves. But I have this looming anxious feeling. My mother in law is coming in to town. I haven' seen her since last summer. She was not always friendly to me and is very much an untreate...	angelchar375	3	796	Jul 6, 2010 by maresie
	Trying To Stay Strong..... (Preview) I kicked my son out of my mother's house (she passed away three years ago) three weeks ago today, it was a terrible scene with him and his friend both of them high and out of control screaming and cussing, the police tried to keep the situation in a negotiated mode, but it ended with my son being arrested...	DreamsOver	6	956	Jul 6, 2010 by maresie
	Just need some help.... (Preview) I'd rather not get into the whole background. I am here due to my fiance being an A. He is not abusive, just rather sloppy and tired. More of a 'happy' drunk as me and my therapist calls him. Anyway she has suggested Al-Anon and I have a print out of some meetings. I realize I am enabling him. I made a set...	Rebecca2019	7	958	Jul 6, 2010 by maresie
	Need ESH on family vacations with A's (Preview) Hello all.. haven't posted in a while but have been lurking. All is as well as can be with an A who is trying to control his drinking. I detach, detach, detach and basically remove myself (and the kids) from his presence when he is drinking. Not too hard when we are at home, because he does most of his d...	MissyPoo	8	957	Jul 6, 2010 by MissyPoo
	Humour and irony! (Preview) Well I have detached from hubby emotionally and physically, the merry go round was making me sick so I got off, we have both played the games, and I have sat on my pity pot telling him over and over why he should change because of the things I have done and continue to do, I mean who else would put up with all th...	Katy	4	1169	Jul 6, 2010 by Karilynn
	Optomist = pessimist (Preview) I was remembering a tape I heard several yrs ago , after reading katy 's post this morning , way to go keeping a positive attitude .. A farmer had a load of manure delivered to his home , he asked his two sons to move it to another location , the pesimist took one look at it and said no way and walked away , the opt...	abbyal	6	720	Jul 6, 2010 by Karilynn
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.