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Back again
(Preview)
Hi everyone I'm not new to this site have been here before a few years ago should have stayed but anyways I'm here now struggling again with a grandson this time man this gets harder and harder. I'm not ready just yet to go into details but I will say this much we had a bad experence about a week ago and I blew e...
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kydee
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5
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320
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Stop the world I want to throw bad tenants OFF.
(Preview)
I bet the tenant dad is A. He just got fired.They said they thought it was time for him to move on.... sigh. he has made up lies and is refusing to pay the rent. so I sent a no cause eviction today. Its nothing they can fight. I will have to live on a very very meager income. Which is fine. I like being frugal and...
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Debilyn
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4
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435
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I changed what could have been a bad day
(Preview)
Hi Its sunday morning here and I am sitting in bed watching cartoons, have my coffee and one of my cats and my two miniature chihuahuas here with me. Hubby is out fishing. I woudl like to talk about yesterday and how I started my day again at lunch time. I have learnt from here that I can start again at any...
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Lindaoakford
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2
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350
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Does time still heal if you stay?
(Preview)
When you first realized or accepted the full extent of your addict's addiction (particularly for those of you whose addict is your spouse or child), did you experience intense emotional pain? I've always known my husband had a "problem," but it rarely interfered with our lives and thing...
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jessicat
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13
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511
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Milestones
(Preview)
Last night I had to walk home a mile in the pitch dark with high winds blowing braches, debris all over. I was all scratched up. Normally I would long to have someone around to help me through it. These days I am willing to wait until I can find the right person rather than grab onto the next available per...
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orchidlover
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5
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261
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this is my topic: patience!
(Preview)
Patience has been on my mind lately. I have had to be patient for 4 weeks+ every since my step-mom died. I guess it has been a rough road. I am up too darn early & have to wait sometimes hours to talk to someone--including my husband--this leads to frustration that sometimes leads to resentment. I onl...
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Hoot Nanny
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3
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732
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Sometimes I have to laugh at myself
(Preview)
Tonight when I got home I noticed AH had only drank 9 beers and 1/2 a bottle of wine. My first thought: "Wow, its a light drinking night." Yeah, I know. But, most nights it is 12-24 beers plus whatever he is hiding or whatever he drank before he got home. I had to laugh at the fact that I live in a wor...
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Very Very Tired
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5
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341
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Hi all!
(Preview)
I just wanted to say hi and post an update...I have been here reading but not responding. I wanted to just listen for awhile. :) Life has been amazing though and I can't complain, not anymore :) I have found that putting negative thoughts out of my mind, by saying to the thoughts "you are not wel...
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youfoundme
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8
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299
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Parent's Handbook To Stop Home Visit AWOLs: Part I
(Preview)
Many parents ask what they can do to stop their child from AWOL'ing while on a home visit from a residential treatment center (RTC). It's a great question, considering it's the biggest fear and reality facing every parent in that situation. Heres the answer: Nothing. That's it. Nothing. Short o...
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Generic Writer
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3
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553
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what is normal?
(Preview)
what should i be like? ive been single since i had my son- he is getting on for 17 now, the reality of it is- i think im in danger of losing my c hance and staying like this forever. ive covered up the damage by thinking this is normal- to live withut a relationship forever because im strong and independent- d...
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rosielee
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17
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725
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i have decided that guy had a personality disorder
(Preview)
re- the thread below "whats normal" where i got pestered by this guy at work. ive been thinking about it- i wont think abut it more beyond tday and im already moved on- but i have thought- he had a full on personality disorder- i think- i guess. the funny thing is- after living with one- why did...
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rosielee
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6
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401
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Experience With Anger
(Preview)
Topic of our meeting today was anger, and I have spent a lot of time today thinking about it. I know anger is a normal emotion...but just the whole dynamic of how it works in my family. I feel like I have let go of the majority of my anger and sadness....I know my husband and I will not be together forever. ...
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KimK
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9
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467
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AH and breakdowns ESH
(Preview)
This is my first online share. I do attend a weekly f2f meeting. Wow, so I thought we were on a good track until late last night when he storms out, waking up our six year old with his cursing. He gets back home at 6:00 this morning in a rage. Tears the closet door off, throws things. Meanwhile I practice...
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TLD
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12
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505
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Changes .. lol
(Preview)
Jozie's post about changes got me thinking, .. changes what kind of changes have I gone though .. and all I can is WOW!! This trip really has brought forth some big things for me. Now granted .. lol .. it's only been 3 days I can say that this is one of the best visits with my mom ever. I am not looking for her t...
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Pushka
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3
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424
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My first meeting without RLC
(Preview)
Hey guys. I had my first meeting without RLC Tuesday night. Our topic was feelings. We keep his chair empty with his books there for any newcomers. It was one of the hardest things I think I ever faced. I did not have to face it alone. I had the support of our group there and all the kind words that came from MI...
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MDK
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10
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305
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I Hate Roller Coasters
(Preview)
How ironic that I hate roller coasters and yet my life has become one. Up one day, down the next. Ugh. My AH continues into some kind of mental unhinging. From 3 nights ago, total meltdown rage, to last night total manic high. I am starting to think he has mental illness on top of his addictions or his addic...
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surfgirl123
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6
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352
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A good thing, but so so scary...
(Preview)
My wife called me in the last hour to ask if I could pick up our daughter from preschool. She said she knows she is extremely vulnerable for a relapse today (she's been sober just over a month) and is asking for help. She also called her sponsor and her therapist. She is reaching out and working her program...
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usedtobeanyer
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4
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315
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Growth and awareness can be sooo painful
(Preview)
Of course the Christmas holidays are coming up and I have an 11 yr old daughter and I'm at a crossroads with my spouse. I want her to have an enjoyable holiday with some stability. I've not put any decorations up yet but I would like to for her. It will be a sad thing because of the change in the family dyna...
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amills4294
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5
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449
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Here I go again on my own!
(Preview)
etc! I am so thrilled to have a life full of joy! But this morning I puked 5 times & am bleeding from an unusual place! Get me to the doctor quick! No, seriously, I am OK. I need a complete overhaul--time is kinda wearing me down but I get to this library every chance I get to visit w/ all of you out there! I...
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Hoot Nanny
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1
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280
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trying not to be misleading!
(Preview)
Just a quick comment: I am not on my own but my comments are my OWN original & sassy! Kathleen
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Hoot Nanny
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1
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547
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When will he hit rock bottom?
(Preview)
I am new to this site and get so much comfort from reading everyone's posts. I was dating someone for about a year. When we met he was a recent widower and seemed like a great guy. We lived about 30 miles from each other and only saw each other on weekends. After 4 months I decided to move closer to him and...
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FL_Sunshine
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7
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644
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Hero to zero
(Preview)
It is amazing to me how in a matter of a day or two I went from being, in my AH's eyes, so beautiful and sensational, to now he can barely stand being around me. He hasn't said that, but he has holed himself up, put on the headphones, and won't look me in the eye. When I was the center of his universe a few days a...
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danni
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7
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446
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change made for the better!!
(Preview)
So yesterday I sat down and had a long talk with my Abf about him blowing all his bill money on drugs... I had a boundry set that if he didn't pay his part of the bills that he would have to move out... We were both strangly calm and I told him that he didn't live up to his end of the bargin so he would have to move ou...
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kris10
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8
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298
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Looking for self assessment pamphlet in PDF format
(Preview)
I am looking for self assessment pamphlet in PDF format,to send the link to my friend so she can assess herself if she has been affected by the disease or people around her with the disease. I can not find it in any URL. If some one can give me a helping hand finding this pdf URL.. I looked in http://www.afg...
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mia883
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11
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2487
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The Longest Flight of My Life...
(Preview)
I lied to my son today. It was a firstsave the early tooth fairy and more recent I was perfect when I was your age stories. My fifteen-year-old knows that he can trust me. My word is everything...until today. The two of us are packing to fly to Chicago to attend my best friends sons Bar Mitzvah. Dad, wha...
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Generic Writer
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3
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294
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update on the car crash and how to respond
(Preview)
I have learned to hold off on updates, because most often I have to update the update, thus I find it easier to wait, or not do it at all. It gives me time not only to have all the facts, but to spend some time just figuring out what I am feeling. I posted that my son got in an accident. He totaled his friend's mo...
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Loupiness
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3
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513
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Inspirational Sayings
(Preview)
I know in the 1+ year I've been around this site, there have been several topics under which people have posted some of their favorite inspirational/al anon sayings. I have really been struggling with the program lately, and in an effort to do a better job working the program, I'm creating a journal....
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stephaniej
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16
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5178
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Why must life feel so miserable......
(Preview)
Hello all - I have posted a few times and have found some encouragement and comfort in those relating to what i have gone through. Quick recap - been technically married for nearly 3 years. It is technical but seems like it never took off. I soon learned that I had been lied to over and over again by an ad...
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downdenise
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11
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7575
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just looking to vent
(Preview)
My BF has been going through a very bad time for about the past 3 weeks he has drank everyday to the point that everyone can tell. he has been verbally abusive to me. I have never once raised my voice to him or accused him of anything. i just listened. He called his sister rambling on and she called me and told...
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HoofnIt
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5
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403
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IT WENT WELLER THAN I THOUGHT IT WOULD!
(Preview)
I am so thrilled to say that the party was a huge success! I just love the lady that I did the party for! I faked her out when she first saw the sign! When she walked in she was sooooooooo surprised. I put a party necklace around her neck because I didn't have a crown or a party hat! The necklace was fancy mardi g...
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Hoot Nanny
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6
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285
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HELP! My alcoholic ex-boyfriend finally surrenders to AA! What can I do?
(Preview)
Hello, I am new to this forum and read a lot of wonderful things on here. I am currently attending Al-Anon meetings for about two months now, I have a sponser and I am working on Step One. My ex-boyfriend of 2 and a half years recently broke up with me when he relapsed about two months ago. When we met, I knew h...
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serenity84
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5
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4011
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WHAT DO YOU MEAN WHEN YOU SAY "LOVING SOMEONE UNCONDITIONALLY?
(Preview)
PLEASE SHARE YOUR MEANINGS.....THANKS OLDERGAL
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oldergal
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13
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4325
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going through something big here
(Preview)
I have felt stalled in my program. I have been going full bore for a long time and I kind of just stalled out. Now this big thing with 1 of my jobs is happening and I am seeing that I wasn't relying on my HP enough and there is a big lesson learned here. I have gotten off track and I need to face that and get myself b...
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Breakingfree
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2
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415
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Dilemma
(Preview)
So my husbands alcoholic he is a "binge drinker". We have a beautiful daughter who is 10 months old and I like an idiot thought when we had her 10 months ago my husband would stop with the drinking. He had some periods a few months where he was sober and I really got my hopes up that he was finished...
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Guitar1
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7
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529
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Have You Changed?
(Preview)
Last Night at our Meeting, the Lady that Lead Had been a Member for 27 yrs, and the Topic of Choice was "Change" She went on to say & see her Changes Since she Got to Al-Anon, and How Far it has Changed her LIfe..Great Meeting... I had shared that When I first Got to Al-Anon, I was VERY Angry, I...
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Jozie
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10
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310
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Im not sure what to do Please help
(Preview)
Sorry I am new here I just had to reach out to someone. Where to start. The man I love is an alcoholic. We met 10 years ago and built a bond like no other I have had before or after. We have a deep and loving friendship and a deeper loving and caring for each other. When we first met he didnt drink. Once he tried it...
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LostInLove
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8
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629
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Progress
(Preview)
Feeling more calm today. Perhaps even good :) I made it to BOTH meeting this week, and may even get to a third! Today, and yesterday, I actually felt excited at work, I felt priviliged to have the opportunity that I do. Of course, I still questioned myself, had moments of feeling absolutely unworth...
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KLotus
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2
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230
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things that have helped - 4 months
(Preview)
Well, I have been on the ACoA and Al Anon board now for about 4 months. I come here every day. I find myself now reading other posts and not thinking.. 'Yeahhh I have that question too" although I still do at times, I find myself sometimes now saying "oooo I remember asking that and this is what...
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Lindaoakford
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11
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509
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Here is a good laugh
(Preview)
He bought and consumed a bottle of vodka today. Gave me an excuse. I told him I had put on three pounds over Thanksgiving. I now weigh 118, so it is not a case of being overweight. This yoyo decided my weight gain was a good excuse to indulge himself in his favorite hobby. What a fool he is! I am tired of...
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Diva
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12
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657
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Returning
(Preview)
Hi, I logged on here about two years ago as my husband of a few months was in rehab. I didn't interact too long with this site as I was feeling emotionally drained and reading and posting comments just seemed too hard. Anyway since then he has been back in rehab once and is now after having another few weeks...
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Grace11
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8
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481
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More ESH needed...
(Preview)
One of the biggest struggles I'm having lately involves all the hypocrisy in my home. First and foremost, my AH's hypocrisy drives me crazy because he says all the time how much he hates hypocrites. He is hypocritical about his hypocrisy! LOL Anyway, I am getting better about just accepting that h...
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stephaniej
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4
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307
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HP is Everywhere...
(Preview)
I had read somewhere Resently that when you lose someone you never ramain the same once they are Gone from your world... I have thought on this long & hard for the last couple weeks, and I now can see it as So... I have spent Many Restless Hours Trying to stay Out of Denial & into Prayer... Its not be...
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Jozie
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4
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509
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How can you help someone who does not want to help themselves? you cant
(Preview)
My husband binge drinks. he just got out of hospital after being Formed 1 from the emerge doc. that means he has to stay in the hospital for 72 hours to be mentally assest, he gets out and immediately buys a big bottle of boose, he has alot of mental and physical issues. i am end the end of my rope trying to hel...
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Deb20011
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7
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1222
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His relapse and my guilt
(Preview)
Ugh. Today I found out my AH (who moved out my request earlier this year) relapsed (again--he's been attempting sobriety for almost a year). This time he *did* reach out but implied to me that he had thought about doing something 'bad' to himself and doesn't trust himself being alone. He was supposed t...
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sookie
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6
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484
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Does your Partner or other half participate in MIP forums also?
(Preview)
Sorry I did a search as I am sure the answer is here somewhere but I could not find it. Also do they know you are here? TIA Jes
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Jes
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16
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512
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I BELIEVE IN SYMMETRY
(Preview)
This song by Bright Eyes just absolutely sings to me... about having faith in what God has in store for you.. and letting go. Some plans were made and rice was thrown A house was built, a baby born How time can move both fast and slow Amazes me And so I raise my glass to symmetry To the second hand and its accu...
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Michelle814
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7
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266
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any kind words will do
(Preview)
Hey everyone, Early tomorrow morning I go in to court for either a stay away hearing, or, more paperwork signing, or a further delay [ and more costs ] It all depends how my ex RA responds to the latest stay away stipulations which he either read yesterday or will read today. The odds of my seeing him t...
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rara avis
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13
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380
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My A is driving me crazy
(Preview)
I've been in recovery for a while - I am an alcoholic and have been sober for 5 years. My A, however, is not sober. I know the rules and have set boundaries but he seems to be more selfish than before. I try to understand, let it go, attend my meetings, do my 12 steps, etc. but i'm only human. Got didn't mak...
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CAM0914
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7
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430
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One year on
(Preview)
Last year I was so morose about my life. I was trapped in a dead end job with a supervisior who I can only describe as vicious. I felt like I would never leave the house I lived in and the alcoholics and addcits were acting out day and night. Of course since I neither drank or acted out they picked on me religou...
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orchidlover
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7
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279
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A few pics of my little herd....
(Preview)
These guys give me chores, make such nice sounds and make me laugh. Mom is Sahari. Then the two babies. The boy is Bright eyes, girl no name yet. The white g pig with the black face is Hobart a neutered male. He has decided he is the daddy of these kids and is protecting them! He is so funny as he struts around l...
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Debilyn
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8
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309
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How to keep sane
(Preview)
My Sanity is Fading! I am trying so hard to take the higher ground, but my AH says my thinking is deranged. I am beginning to question why I cant just be happy with things and if I am crazy But every time I express a need for things to change, no drinking (mostly because of the recent physical abuse), he...
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oldgraduate
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5
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558
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Family Guilt trips
(Preview)
Every year my family of origin and my dad's extended family particpates in a Christmas gift exchange. Names are drawn and a $50 gift is exchanged. This year I have told the family due to my family circumstances and all that is going on in my life I would like to bow out and not participate. You would thin...
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amills4294
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6
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636
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decision made to do no decision making
(Preview)
My decision today is to make no decision today until my roomate kicks me out this may be my answer every day to whether you not I should live with my AH when he gets out of rehab.. also my answer to whether we get a divorce if the mayhem continues I think I will know what to do when I know what to do. Also a dear fri...
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Michelle814
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4
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236
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Need some ESH
(Preview)
So many months ago, during a heated "discussion" about my AH's drinking, I informed him in what I felt was a calm, non-judgmental way that I was not willing to buy beer for him. To his credit, he has respected this boundary, and has never asked me to pick up a 12-pack with the groceries, etc. N...
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stephaniej
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7
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419
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Help! Desperate Emergency
(Preview)
Things have been rockly lately. AH has been having wild mood swings, things have not been stable. When I got home from work last night I walked into an complete melt down from him. He said he was upset because he hadn't finished dinner for me, the grill ran out of gas, and he couldn't get a cardboard box ta...
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surfgirl123
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9
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832
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I'm not sure
(Preview)
Last week was a tough week. Monday night and Wednesday night I was catching the spiral of ugliness. Thursday morning I was getting ready for my race and my AH came in to the room. I looked at him and told him that just because he doesn't love himself doesn't mean that I don't love him and he can accept that or...
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Jackie11
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6
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504
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Ok this PM program is messed up?????
(Preview)
Help! It says I have six messages, I don't. The writing is so small it is hard to read. What was wrong with how it was before? ????
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Debilyn
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5
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310
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24 year old son - 1 year of rehab/AA - then relapse
(Preview)
Our 24 year old son was "forced" into rehab by us almost 1 year ago, and came out 3 mos later the son we remembered. He appreciated AA, had a great sponsor and went 5 times a week. Then, 6 mos in a sober living house where he just went through the motions, declaring he was NOT an addict and didn'...
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MamaBird
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6
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434
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Recently discovered my husband is addicted to weed as well.
(Preview)
Do you ever wish you could put on a pair of magic glasses that would allow you to see the truth of your loved ones' addiction, and not just the lies they feed you about it or the scenarios you have in your own mind? I feel like I'm going crazy trying to understand the extent of my husband's addiction so that I c...
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jessicat
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12
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2580
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yes I'm still here....
(Preview)
Haven't posted in a while... But I've still been reading... Hanging in there. Day by day.. So during november I had set a boundry that if my A doesn't pay his part of the bills then he needs to leave.... Well his pay day came and wouldn't ya know it he was high for 5 days straight... 1000 bucks gone in a day......
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kris10
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11
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484
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