Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

cinders · cinders

After 8 years of living with my husband's drinking and his constant complaints about how it is too hard to live with me and my 4 children (from previous marriage) I told him to decide, stay and get help, go to counseling and work through this together or go. He chose to go. He moved out on Saturday. Sayi...

Jozie · Jozie

Often Times on this Journey thru life, I find that I Tend to Jump from Step to Step... Not So Much in order but to my choosing... I have a Dear Friend that Told me to Work them anyway I Wanted as long as I eventually got to them all... :) And I have, but this time of Year I tend to CLING too Step Eleven... Sought th...

rehprof · rehprof

So...I have been separated for a year..currently divorcing from AH. been dating a guy exclusively for about 6 months -- and today we decided to date others...mostly because he feels he can't give me what I need in a relationship -- because he has emotional scars from previous relationships. Intelle...

John · John

I place here a link to the AA groups message board, that goes directly to the post of my speaking at the Tri City Conference of AA, on Oct 21st, 2011. If you would like to listen to it, please click the link. I just prefer to not place AA material such as this on the Al-Anon board. If you listen to it, and woul...

atheos · atheos

Had a 1st appointment with a psychologist today. My sponsor's been recommending that for a while. It went OK, and the doctor seemed nice, but I'm really scared he'll think I'm a chronic whiner who's just wasting his time when his other patients have *real* problems... I've decided to stick it out for a...

amills4294 · amills4294

My spouse's car is in the shop - it has been so many times over the past few months. The mechanic he goes to is across town. I've been more then willing to take him to drop his car off and pick him up many times. His car problems are a sore issue. It was another one of his purchases that was made out of impul...

rosielee · rosielee

i was on the receiving end of my mums verbal and physical abuse from an early age- thrugh to my teens and then into my twenties and early thirties. you react to criticism and negativity when you are too yung to know better- and in yur teens you deffinitely do...but somewhere along the lines it dawned on m...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

As you can see by my angry face--I am frustrated by the ignorance & lack of knowledge that some people have about the Alanon program! I went to a VA hospital yesterday & wanted to just leave some literature. A big-wig not so nice lady told me that it was SOLICITATION! They have AA meetings actual...

nyc018 · nyc018

My AH and I are separated, but remain in close contact. Hes in AA and has a sponsor. Hes been sober since his last binge drove him insane (but to 2 week rehab) 3+ months ago. This binge also led to him to losing his job - a very good job that he worked hard to get. He'd only been there 10 months. However, whi...

Michelle814 · Michelle814

I have been praying deeply to God to grant me compassion for all people. I am letting go of the judgements I make and asking God to fill my judgmental attitude with compassion instead. I make progress than I take steps backward. I most judgmental over those who judge haha.. this is the irony. They mak...

stephaniej · stephaniej

I've been struggling with the program so much lately. I think what is challenging me most is having my AH home, after he was working 600 miles away for 7 months. It was so much easier to detach when he was gone... Anyway, I hit my own new low point on Sunday night. Nobody had slept much, because my younge...

rehprof · rehprof

so yah, my bf and I, we broke up -- that hurts ALOT -- tara brach (buddhist teacher) says that is the first arrow...the event that causes us pain what causes us (me) suffering comes from the second arrow --the thoughts that include "I wasn't good enough in bed" or "I wasn't funny enough...

mehere80 · mehere80

For those of you that have read the phamplet "Alcoholism, a merry go round named denial", my husband and I (my A) are in Act III and I've clearly been the role of provoker during our marriage. During Act II a few months ago, I had changed my role. I entered Al-Anon. I made him get his own bank...

amills4294 · amills4294

I am happy I had a good day yesterday. I enjoyed the time with my daughter. I tried to chant the serenity prayer when I felt challenged and it helped. I continued to try to turn things over to my HP. I am challenged by my spouse and his rollercoaster of emotions. I believe it boils down to the fact that he...

Michelle814 · Michelle814

I went to visit my husband in rehab on Saturday and it was amazing!!! Over the past two and a half weeks of him being away I have had, what they refer to as, a spiritual awakening. I have never experienced one before. I now talk to my HP all the time. I yell, I cry, I laugh, I talk and the amazing thing is......

ifa · ifa

The world seems like it's trying to make me feel worthless, but I am still not really convinced. I am 59 but I don't feel old and actually I feel better than I ever did. I have loved the same guy since I was 13, but he is still non-committal. I think after all these years, his eyes should light up when he sees me...

kydee · kydee

Is the chat room still open and are there still online meetings there? I have been trying for several days to get in there no luck any help I'm not to computer smart Thanks.

usedtobeanyer · usedtobeanyer

Wow, had a real eye opener today from my 3 year old son. The last few days have been rough, what with my wife drinking & lying about it again. I'm not doing a very good job of keeping my side of the street clean as this is happening, however, and I find myself just full of rage after my alcoholic continues...

grantmeserenity · grantmeserenity

Ive been active in al-anon for about a year & a half. I also used to post here but just recently got new login info. Anyhow- My A and I have a young child together & have been together for 3 years. Hes been in and out of the program. The last relapse was pretty bad and I simply couldnt handle talking to...

pineapple · pineapple

It's been quite a weekend. I cried for the past three days. Saturday I was exhausted from working, and from the emotional meltdown I've been going through. But I slept well that night, first time in a while. Yesterday I walked the dogs and didn't do any work except what I wanted to do. I putzed in the garde...

Grace7 · Grace7

Hey there. Long story, try to be short. Son is a lifer in military. He was divorced, and rebounded quickly. The new girl was murdered, he was a mess. He deployed, and resorted to a dating service online, Met a couple of girls. One, we liked, a Lot. Still too soon though, needed to heal. Next one h...

John · John

RLC and I had a special relationship that all the miles between us couldn't dampen at all. One day recently he sent me the following PM and I truly think it reflects clearly the kind of man he was. **************November 6th Reply DeleteRLC John, I hope you are doing well.....and taking care of y...

Debilyn · Debilyn

you can just sign in to the AA board to hear it. Its ez. I promise you won't be sorry! I learned so so very much!

lookingup · lookingup

he had been having back problems lower back pain and bleeding alot in his urin went to er they sent him to a urologist and he sent him back to er for more test ,plus he has alot of fluid builup in one of his testicles and a hole in his stomck lineing which r not concerned about right now they ruled out any kidne...

John · John

I once thought my pitiful life had been reduced to waking up, drinking coffee, saying a prayer, going to work, coming home, taking a shower, eating, going to a meeting, coming home, watching some tv, going to bed and .....waking up, drinking coffee, saying a prayer, going to work, coming home, taking...

debbiems · debbiems

Hi- I am new to posting, i do attend meetings although I haven't been faithful about going. Long story short my husband and I have a 22 yr old son who has been in and out of treatment and jail. He got out of his last court ordered treatment Nov 1, 2011 after being there for 6 months prior to going he spent 4 mont...

Michelle814 · Michelle814

"But you should never be embarrassed by your trouble with living. Because it is the ones with the sorest throats, Laura, who have done the most singing." -Bright Eyes I've been through the ringer, man. I can smile and tell you I am so grateful for it. In May I had a miscarriage, then August 30...

Generic Writer · Generic Writer

Someone sent me a message that my "posts are deep, thoughtful," but nobody knows who I am. He also wrote please introduce yourself to us - I think you'll find a lot of friends on here. I never thought of introducing myself... rather letting people know who I am through my writings. This is a m...

atheos · atheos

Met with my sponsor today, to discuss step 3 and prepare for step 4. One of the questions was something along the lines of "Do I trust my higher power to care for me?", and after hearing my answer she said she's not sure I'm ready for the 4th step, that you need to trust a loving, caring higher pow...

pineapple · pineapple

For weeks now I've been making an effort to be positive, to find what small happiness I can, to get out and do things, see people. Somewhere yesterday I lost the will to even make those efforts. I am so tired and sad and alone. This morning I will make myself get dressed and go into town. If I don't go to the ma...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

It is 5am and I layed awake for hours before I got up and had to write a letter to my employer about a mess going on at work. It felt good to get it out and than I thought I would go back to bed, but now the head is on a tangent and now I am obsessing about all that I should be getting done before our trip in 2 days. Man a...

oldergal · oldergal

You have been Mother/Father to this person/s for all their life. Then they're gone. It does leave a hole in one's heart. They say "love them from afar" what exactly does that mean? If you get another chance to start a different relationship with them, what would that look like? It just seems...

Tracey C · Tracey C

Hi, I was wondering if anyoneelse has troubles with their spouse not showering. Needless to say on those nights nothing romantic happens. It's not all the time just now and then. Sometimes I get him out of bed to have one as I don't want him smelling all night long. Is this poking my nose in where it do...

atheos · atheos

First, I just want to say: I have no problem with people in AA coming to Al-Anon if they also have the problem of alcoholism in a friend or family member and are coming to Al-Anon because of that. That is perfectly OK. What I *do* have a problem with is people from local halfway houses who "just want to...

amills4294 · amills4294

With all of the resources I've tapped into in the past year or so (Alanon only past few months) I'm starting to feel more grounded - more aware and am feeling some growth. I know I have a loooong way to go and life will always be a place for growth but maybe it won't always be a struggle. :) I've been turning t...

Loupiness · Loupiness

I've been thinking about how a toddler can firmly and simply say "no" all by himself, over and over again, and mean it, but most attempts by me turn into a dissertation. The biggest cause of and problem with this, is that my al-anon heart and my mama heart do not play well together. The progra...

Generic Writer · Generic Writer

http://www.genericwriter.com/2011/09/25/i-lied-to-my-son-today/

debbiems · debbiems

I just picked my 22 yr old son from his "friends" house drunk. He called me asking for me to pick him up that he "screwed up" All the way home he was crying and kept telling me how sorry he was. How afraid he was. We live out in the country so it was a long ride home. I really didn't know...

kydee · kydee

Hi everyone I'm not new to this site have been here before a few years ago should have stayed but anyways I'm here now struggling again with a grandson this time man this gets harder and harder. I'm not ready just yet to go into details but I will say this much we had a bad experence about a week ago and I blew e...

Debilyn · Debilyn

I bet the tenant dad is A. He just got fired.They said they thought it was time for him to move on.... sigh. he has made up lies and is refusing to pay the rent. so I sent a no cause eviction today. Its nothing they can fight. I will have to live on a very very meager income. Which is fine. I like being frugal and...

Lindaoakford · Lindaoakford

Hi Its sunday morning here and I am sitting in bed watching cartoons, have my coffee and one of my cats and my two miniature chihuahuas here with me. Hubby is out fishing. I woudl like to talk about yesterday and how I started my day again at lunch time. I have learnt from here that I can start again at any...

jessicat · jessicat

When you first realized or accepted the full extent of your addict's addiction (particularly for those of you whose addict is your spouse or child), did you experience intense emotional pain? I've always known my husband had a "problem," but it rarely interfered with our lives and thing...

orchidlover · orchidlover

Last night I had to walk home a mile in the pitch dark with high winds blowing braches, debris all over. I was all scratched up. Normally I would long to have someone around to help me through it. These days I am willing to wait until I can find the right person rather than grab onto the next available per...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Patience has been on my mind lately. I have had to be patient for 4 weeks+ every since my step-mom died. I guess it has been a rough road. I am up too darn early & have to wait sometimes hours to talk to someone--including my husband--this leads to frustration that sometimes leads to resentment. I onl...

Very Very Tired · Very Very Tired

Tonight when I got home I noticed AH had only drank 9 beers and 1/2 a bottle of wine. My first thought: "Wow, its a light drinking night." Yeah, I know. But, most nights it is 12-24 beers plus whatever he is hiding or whatever he drank before he got home. I had to laugh at the fact that I live in a wor...

youfoundme · youfoundme

I just wanted to say hi and post an update...I have been here reading but not responding. I wanted to just listen for awhile. :) Life has been amazing though and I can't complain, not anymore :) I have found that putting negative thoughts out of my mind, by saying to the thoughts "you are not wel...

Generic Writer · Generic Writer

Many parents ask what they can do to stop their child from AWOL'ing while on a home visit from a residential treatment center (RTC). It's a great question, considering it's the biggest fear and reality facing every parent in that situation. Heres the answer: Nothing. That's it. Nothing. Short o...

rosielee · rosielee

what should i be like? ive been single since i had my son- he is getting on for 17 now, the reality of it is- i think im in danger of losing my c hance and staying like this forever. ive covered up the damage by thinking this is normal- to live withut a relationship forever because im strong and independent- d...

rosielee · rosielee

re- the thread below "whats normal" where i got pestered by this guy at work. ive been thinking about it- i wont think abut it more beyond tday and im already moved on- but i have thought- he had a full on personality disorder- i think- i guess. the funny thing is- after living with one- why did...

KimK · KimK

Topic of our meeting today was anger, and I have spent a lot of time today thinking about it. I know anger is a normal emotion...but just the whole dynamic of how it works in my family. I feel like I have let go of the majority of my anger and sadness....I know my husband and I will not be together forever. ...

TLD · TLD

This is my first online share. I do attend a weekly f2f meeting. Wow, so I thought we were on a good track until late last night when he storms out, waking up our six year old with his cursing. He gets back home at 6:00 this morning in a rage. Tears the closet door off, throws things. Meanwhile I practice...

Pushka · Pushka

Jozie's post about changes got me thinking, .. changes what kind of changes have I gone though .. and all I can is WOW!! This trip really has brought forth some big things for me. Now granted .. lol .. it's only been 3 days I can say that this is one of the best visits with my mom ever. I am not looking for her t...

MDK · MDK

Hey guys. I had my first meeting without RLC Tuesday night. Our topic was feelings. We keep his chair empty with his books there for any newcomers. It was one of the hardest things I think I ever faced. I did not have to face it alone. I had the support of our group there and all the kind words that came from MI...

surfgirl123 · surfgirl123

How ironic that I hate roller coasters and yet my life has become one. Up one day, down the next. Ugh. My AH continues into some kind of mental unhinging. From 3 nights ago, total meltdown rage, to last night total manic high. I am starting to think he has mental illness on top of his addictions or his addic...

usedtobeanyer · usedtobeanyer

My wife called me in the last hour to ask if I could pick up our daughter from preschool. She said she knows she is extremely vulnerable for a relapse today (she's been sober just over a month) and is asking for help. She also called her sponsor and her therapist. She is reaching out and working her program...

amills4294 · amills4294

Of course the Christmas holidays are coming up and I have an 11 yr old daughter and I'm at a crossroads with my spouse. I want her to have an enjoyable holiday with some stability. I've not put any decorations up yet but I would like to for her. It will be a sad thing because of the change in the family dyna...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

etc! I am so thrilled to have a life full of joy! But this morning I puked 5 times & am bleeding from an unusual place! Get me to the doctor quick! No, seriously, I am OK. I need a complete overhaul--time is kinda wearing me down but I get to this library every chance I get to visit w/ all of you out there! I...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Just a quick comment: I am not on my own but my comments are my OWN original & sassy! Kathleen

FL_Sunshine · FL_Sunshine

I am new to this site and get so much comfort from reading everyone's posts. I was dating someone for about a year. When we met he was a recent widower and seemed like a great guy. We lived about 30 miles from each other and only saw each other on weekends. After 4 months I decided to move closer to him and...

danni · danni

It is amazing to me how in a matter of a day or two I went from being, in my AH's eyes, so beautiful and sensational, to now he can barely stand being around me. He hasn't said that, but he has holed himself up, put on the headphones, and won't look me in the eye. When I was the center of his universe a few days a...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Now what? (Preview) After 8 years of living with my husband's drinking and his constant complaints about how it is too hard to live with me and my 4 children (from previous marriage) I told him to decide, stay and get help, go to counseling and work through this together or go. He chose to go. He moved out on Saturday. Sayi...	cinders	8	435	Dec 7, 2011 by cinders
	My NEED for the 11th Step... (Preview) Often Times on this Journey thru life, I find that I Tend to Jump from Step to Step... Not So Much in order but to my choosing... I have a Dear Friend that Told me to Work them anyway I Wanted as long as I eventually got to them all... :) And I have, but this time of Year I tend to CLING too Step Eleven... Sought th...	Jozie	3	1551	Dec 7, 2011 by Debilyn
	Breaking Up is hard to do (Preview) So...I have been separated for a year..currently divorcing from AH. been dating a guy exclusively for about 6 months -- and today we decided to date others...mostly because he feels he can't give me what I need in a relationship -- because he has emotional scars from previous relationships. Intelle...	rehprof	7	505	Dec 7, 2011 by Rematch--
	AA Speaker Tape - John F. (Tri City Conference 2011) (Preview) I place here a link to the AA groups message board, that goes directly to the post of my speaking at the Tri City Conference of AA, on Oct 21st, 2011. If you would like to listen to it, please click the link. I just prefer to not place AA material such as this on the Al-Anon board. If you listen to it, and woul...	John	11	4092	Dec 7, 2011 by John
	Seeing a therapist (Preview) Had a 1st appointment with a psychologist today. My sponsor's been recommending that for a while. It went OK, and the doctor seemed nice, but I'm really scared he'll think I'm a chronic whiner who's just wasting his time when his other patients have real problems... I've decided to stick it out for a...	atheos	8	435	Dec 7, 2011 by orchidlover
	What am I sooo afraid of? (Preview) My spouse's car is in the shop - it has been so many times over the past few months. The mechanic he goes to is across town. I've been more then willing to take him to drop his car off and pick him up many times. His car problems are a sore issue. It was another one of his purchases that was made out of impul...	amills4294	13	505	Dec 7, 2011 by Lindaoakford
	not having your buttons pushed (Preview) i was on the receiving end of my mums verbal and physical abuse from an early age- thrugh to my teens and then into my twenties and early thirties. you react to criticism and negativity when you are too yung to know better- and in yur teens you deffinitely do...but somewhere along the lines it dawned on m...	rosielee	7	449	Dec 7, 2011 by orchidlover
	WHY DO PEOPLE HAVE TO BE SO IGNORANT; JUST SAYING! (Preview) As you can see by my angry face--I am frustrated by the ignorance & lack of knowledge that some people have about the Alanon program! I went to a VA hospital yesterday & wanted to just leave some literature. A big-wig not so nice lady told me that it was SOLICITATION! They have AA meetings actual...	Hoot Nanny	5	492	Dec 7, 2011 by orchidlover
	Disengaging and Trying Not to Live in Future Wreckage (Preview) My AH and I are separated, but remain in close contact. Hes in AA and has a sponsor. Hes been sober since his last binge drove him insane (but to 2 week rehab) 3+ months ago. This binge also led to him to losing his job - a very good job that he worked hard to get. He'd only been there 10 months. However, whi...	nyc018	6	1139	Dec 7, 2011 by orchidlover
	Step 4 Work ... I Judge the Judgmental (Preview) I have been praying deeply to God to grant me compassion for all people. I am letting go of the judgements I make and asking God to fill my judgmental attitude with compassion instead. I make progress than I take steps backward. I most judgmental over those who judge haha.. this is the irony. They mak...	Michelle814	1	493	Dec 7, 2011 by rosielee
	Hitting my own low point (Preview) I've been struggling with the program so much lately. I think what is challenging me most is having my AH home, after he was working 600 miles away for 7 months. It was so much easier to detach when he was gone... Anyway, I hit my own new low point on Sunday night. Nobody had slept much, because my younge...	stephaniej	10	415	Dec 7, 2011 by stephaniej
	Suffering from the second arrow (Preview) so yah, my bf and I, we broke up -- that hurts ALOT -- tara brach (buddhist teacher) says that is the first arrow...the event that causes us pain what causes us (me) suffering comes from the second arrow --the thoughts that include "I wasn't good enough in bed" or "I wasn't funny enough...	rehprof	16	506	Dec 6, 2011 by Lindaoakford
	Ending a marriage during Act III of the Merry Go Round Named Denial (Preview) For those of you that have read the phamplet "Alcoholism, a merry go round named denial", my husband and I (my A) are in Act III and I've clearly been the role of provoker during our marriage. During Act II a few months ago, I had changed my role. I entered Al-Anon. I made him get his own bank...	mehere80	12	1299	Dec 6, 2011 by wifegoeson
	One good day does not always lead to another :) (Preview) I am happy I had a good day yesterday. I enjoyed the time with my daughter. I tried to chant the serenity prayer when I felt challenged and it helped. I continued to try to turn things over to my HP. I am challenged by my spouse and his rollercoaster of emotions. I believe it boils down to the fact that he...	amills4294	7	540	Dec 6, 2011 by wifegoeson
	Surrounded by Miracles let go and let god live and let live miracles spiritual awakening (Preview) I went to visit my husband in rehab on Saturday and it was amazing!!! Over the past two and a half weeks of him being away I have had, what they refer to as, a spiritual awakening. I have never experienced one before. I now talk to my HP all the time. I yell, I cry, I laugh, I talk and the amazing thing is......	Michelle814	6	1733	Dec 6, 2011 by Breakingfree
	worthless reject (Preview) The world seems like it's trying to make me feel worthless, but I am still not really convinced. I am 59 but I don't feel old and actually I feel better than I ever did. I have loved the same guy since I was 13, but he is still non-committal. I think after all these years, his eyes should light up when he sees me...	ifa	14	627	Dec 6, 2011 by pinkchip
	Chat Room and Meetings (Preview) Is the chat room still open and are there still online meetings there? I have been trying for several days to get in there no luck any help I'm not to computer smart Thanks.	kydee	2	335	Dec 6, 2011 by xeno59
	"You're my best friend, dad..." (Preview) Wow, had a real eye opener today from my 3 year old son. The last few days have been rough, what with my wife drinking & lying about it again. I'm not doing a very good job of keeping my side of the street clean as this is happening, however, and I find myself just full of rage after my alcoholic continues...	usedtobeanyer	14	648	Dec 6, 2011 by Breakingfree
	ESH please! family resentment one day at a time holidays (Preview) Ive been active in al-anon for about a year & a half. I also used to post here but just recently got new login info. Anyhow- My A and I have a young child together & have been together for 3 years. Hes been in and out of the program. The last relapse was pretty bad and I simply couldnt handle talking to...	grantmeserenity	13	9557	Dec 6, 2011 by Breakingfree
	better (Preview) It's been quite a weekend. I cried for the past three days. Saturday I was exhausted from working, and from the emotional meltdown I've been going through. But I slept well that night, first time in a while. Yesterday I walked the dogs and didn't do any work except what I wanted to do. I putzed in the garde...	pineapple	9	367	Dec 6, 2011 by rehprof
	Sons Newest Wife (Preview) Hey there. Long story, try to be short. Son is a lifer in military. He was divorced, and rebounded quickly. The new girl was murdered, he was a mess. He deployed, and resorted to a dating service online, Met a couple of girls. One, we liked, a Lot. Still too soon though, needed to heal. Next one h...	Grace7	1	396	Dec 6, 2011 by Debilyn
	A PM From RLC (Preview) RLC and I had a special relationship that all the miles between us couldn't dampen at all. One day recently he sent me the following PM and I truly think it reflects clearly the kind of man he was. **************November 6th Reply DeleteRLC John, I hope you are doing well.....and taking care of y...	John	10	541	Dec 6, 2011 by Andrea12
	Please listen to John's share, its soooo amazing! (Preview) you can just sign in to the AA board to hear it. Its ez. I promise you won't be sorry! I learned so so very much!	Debilyn	0	278	Dec 5, 2011 by Debilyn
	concerned for my a/d b/f (Preview) he had been having back problems lower back pain and bleeding alot in his urin went to er they sent him to a urologist and he sent him back to er for more test ,plus he has alot of fluid builup in one of his testicles and a hole in his stomck lineing which r not concerned about right now they ruled out any kidne...	lookingup	4	367	Dec 5, 2011 by orchidlover
	This way of life... Boring?? (Preview) I once thought my pitiful life had been reduced to waking up, drinking coffee, saying a prayer, going to work, coming home, taking a shower, eating, going to a meeting, coming home, watching some tv, going to bed and .....waking up, drinking coffee, saying a prayer, going to work, coming home, taking...	John	8	813	Dec 5, 2011 by Michelle814
	New to posting (Preview) Hi- I am new to posting, i do attend meetings although I haven't been faithful about going. Long story short my husband and I have a 22 yr old son who has been in and out of treatment and jail. He got out of his last court ordered treatment Nov 1, 2011 after being there for 6 months prior to going he spent 4 mont...	debbiems	7	580	Dec 5, 2011 by Michelle814
	it is the ones with the sorest throats who have done the most singing (Preview) "But you should never be embarrassed by your trouble with living. Because it is the ones with the sorest throats, Laura, who have done the most singing." -Bright Eyes I've been through the ringer, man. I can smile and tell you I am so grateful for it. In May I had a miscarriage, then August 30...	Michelle814	4	295	Dec 5, 2011 by Michelle814
	Someone suggested that I introduce myself... (Preview) Someone sent me a message that my "posts are deep, thoughtful," but nobody knows who I am. He also wrote please introduce yourself to us - I think you'll find a lot of friends on here. I never thought of introducing myself... rather letting people know who I am through my writings. This is a m...	Generic Writer	11	721	Dec 5, 2011 by Michelle814
	Not ready for step 4 (Preview) Met with my sponsor today, to discuss step 3 and prepare for step 4. One of the questions was something along the lines of "Do I trust my higher power to care for me?", and after hearing my answer she said she's not sure I'm ready for the 4th step, that you need to trust a loving, caring higher pow...	atheos	11	503	Dec 5, 2011 by Michelle814
	encouragement (Preview) For weeks now I've been making an effort to be positive, to find what small happiness I can, to get out and do things, see people. Somewhere yesterday I lost the will to even make those efforts. I am so tired and sad and alone. This morning I will make myself get dressed and go into town. If I don't go to the ma...	pineapple	11	703	Dec 4, 2011 by GailMichelle
	I am obsessing (Preview) It is 5am and I layed awake for hours before I got up and had to write a letter to my employer about a mess going on at work. It felt good to get it out and than I thought I would go back to bed, but now the head is on a tangent and now I am obsessing about all that I should be getting done before our trip in 2 days. Man a...	Breakingfree	9	454	Dec 4, 2011 by orchidlover
	SO, YOUR SON/DAUGHTER HAS LEFT YOUR HOME (Preview) You have been Mother/Father to this person/s for all their life. Then they're gone. It does leave a hole in one's heart. They say "love them from afar" what exactly does that mean? If you get another chance to start a different relationship with them, what would that look like? It just seems...	oldergal	2	439	Dec 4, 2011 by likemyheart
	Hygene (Preview) Hi, I was wondering if anyoneelse has troubles with their spouse not showering. Needless to say on those nights nothing romantic happens. It's not all the time just now and then. Sometimes I get him out of bed to have one as I don't want him smelling all night long. Is this poking my nose in where it do...	Tracey C	7	351	Dec 4, 2011 by tommyecat
	Alcoholics invading our meeting! (Preview) First, I just want to say: I have no problem with people in AA coming to Al-Anon if they also have the problem of alcoholism in a friend or family member and are coming to Al-Anon because of that. That is perfectly OK. What I do have a problem with is people from local halfway houses who "just want to...	atheos	12	662	Dec 4, 2011 by tommyecat
	slowly beginning to work (Preview) With all of the resources I've tapped into in the past year or so (Alanon only past few months) I'm starting to feel more grounded - more aware and am feeling some growth. I know I have a loooong way to go and life will always be a place for growth but maybe it won't always be a struggle. :) I've been turning t...	amills4294	2	396	Dec 4, 2011 by tommyecat
	How can "no" have so many words... (Preview) I've been thinking about how a toddler can firmly and simply say "no" all by himself, over and over again, and mean it, but most attempts by me turn into a dissertation. The biggest cause of and problem with this, is that my al-anon heart and my mama heart do not play well together. The progra...	Loupiness	4	656	Dec 4, 2011 by Jerry F
	I Lied To My Son Today... Al-Anon Addict Son (Preview) http://www.genericwriter.com/2011/09/25/i-lied-to-my-son-today/	Generic Writer	5	548	Dec 4, 2011 by likemyheart
	Rough Evening (Preview) I just picked my 22 yr old son from his "friends" house drunk. He called me asking for me to pick him up that he "screwed up" All the way home he was crying and kept telling me how sorry he was. How afraid he was. We live out in the country so it was a long ride home. I really didn't know...	debbiems	6	370	Dec 4, 2011 by debbiems
	Back again (Preview) Hi everyone I'm not new to this site have been here before a few years ago should have stayed but anyways I'm here now struggling again with a grandson this time man this gets harder and harder. I'm not ready just yet to go into details but I will say this much we had a bad experence about a week ago and I blew e...	kydee	5	339	Dec 4, 2011 by tommyecat
	Stop the world I want to throw bad tenants OFF. (Preview) I bet the tenant dad is A. He just got fired.They said they thought it was time for him to move on.... sigh. he has made up lies and is refusing to pay the rent. so I sent a no cause eviction today. Its nothing they can fight. I will have to live on a very very meager income. Which is fine. I like being frugal and...	Debilyn	4	452	Dec 4, 2011 by Jen
	I changed what could have been a bad day (Preview) Hi Its sunday morning here and I am sitting in bed watching cartoons, have my coffee and one of my cats and my two miniature chihuahuas here with me. Hubby is out fishing. I woudl like to talk about yesterday and how I started my day again at lunch time. I have learnt from here that I can start again at any...	Lindaoakford	2	370	Dec 3, 2011 by Debilyn
	Does time still heal if you stay? (Preview) When you first realized or accepted the full extent of your addict's addiction (particularly for those of you whose addict is your spouse or child), did you experience intense emotional pain? I've always known my husband had a "problem," but it rarely interfered with our lives and thing...	jessicat	13	537	Dec 3, 2011 by jessicat
	Milestones (Preview) Last night I had to walk home a mile in the pitch dark with high winds blowing braches, debris all over. I was all scratched up. Normally I would long to have someone around to help me through it. These days I am willing to wait until I can find the right person rather than grab onto the next available per...	orchidlover	5	285	Dec 3, 2011 by orchidlover
	this is my topic: patience! (Preview) Patience has been on my mind lately. I have had to be patient for 4 weeks+ every since my step-mom died. I guess it has been a rough road. I am up too darn early & have to wait sometimes hours to talk to someone--including my husband--this leads to frustration that sometimes leads to resentment. I onl...	Hoot Nanny	3	776	Dec 3, 2011 by tommyecat
	Sometimes I have to laugh at myself (Preview) Tonight when I got home I noticed AH had only drank 9 beers and 1/2 a bottle of wine. My first thought: "Wow, its a light drinking night." Yeah, I know. But, most nights it is 12-24 beers plus whatever he is hiding or whatever he drank before he got home. I had to laugh at the fact that I live in a wor...	Very Very Tired	5	362	Dec 3, 2011 by Lindaoakford
	Hi all! (Preview) I just wanted to say hi and post an update...I have been here reading but not responding. I wanted to just listen for awhile. :) Life has been amazing though and I can't complain, not anymore :) I have found that putting negative thoughts out of my mind, by saying to the thoughts "you are not wel...	youfoundme	8	320	Dec 3, 2011 by tommyecat
	Parent's Handbook To Stop Home Visit AWOLs: Part I residential_treatment_center AWOL Al-Anon Generic_Writer (Preview) Many parents ask what they can do to stop their child from AWOL'ing while on a home visit from a residential treatment center (RTC). It's a great question, considering it's the biggest fear and reality facing every parent in that situation. Heres the answer: Nothing. That's it. Nothing. Short o...	Generic Writer	3	574	Dec 3, 2011 by Debilyn
	what is normal? (Preview) what should i be like? ive been single since i had my son- he is getting on for 17 now, the reality of it is- i think im in danger of losing my c hance and staying like this forever. ive covered up the damage by thinking this is normal- to live withut a relationship forever because im strong and independent- d...	rosielee	17	752	Dec 3, 2011 by Lindaoakford
	i have decided that guy had a personality disorder (Preview) re- the thread below "whats normal" where i got pestered by this guy at work. ive been thinking about it- i wont think abut it more beyond tday and im already moved on- but i have thought- he had a full on personality disorder- i think- i guess. the funny thing is- after living with one- why did...	rosielee	6	423	Dec 3, 2011 by Lindaoakford
	Experience With Anger (Preview) Topic of our meeting today was anger, and I have spent a lot of time today thinking about it. I know anger is a normal emotion...but just the whole dynamic of how it works in my family. I feel like I have let go of the majority of my anger and sadness....I know my husband and I will not be together forever. ...	KimK	9	488	Dec 3, 2011 by rosielee
	AH and breakdowns ESH (Preview) This is my first online share. I do attend a weekly f2f meeting. Wow, so I thought we were on a good track until late last night when he storms out, waking up our six year old with his cursing. He gets back home at 6:00 this morning in a rage. Tears the closet door off, throws things. Meanwhile I practice...	TLD	12	528	Dec 3, 2011 by TLD
	Changes .. lol (Preview) Jozie's post about changes got me thinking, .. changes what kind of changes have I gone though .. and all I can is WOW!! This trip really has brought forth some big things for me. Now granted .. lol .. it's only been 3 days I can say that this is one of the best visits with my mom ever. I am not looking for her t...	Pushka	3	445	Dec 3, 2011 by Breakingfree
	My first meeting without RLC (Preview) Hey guys. I had my first meeting without RLC Tuesday night. Our topic was feelings. We keep his chair empty with his books there for any newcomers. It was one of the hardest things I think I ever faced. I did not have to face it alone. I had the support of our group there and all the kind words that came from MI...	MDK	10	325	Dec 2, 2011 by John
	I Hate Roller Coasters (Preview) How ironic that I hate roller coasters and yet my life has become one. Up one day, down the next. Ugh. My AH continues into some kind of mental unhinging. From 3 nights ago, total meltdown rage, to last night total manic high. I am starting to think he has mental illness on top of his addictions or his addic...	surfgirl123	6	380	Dec 2, 2011 by Jerry F
	A good thing, but so so scary... (Preview) My wife called me in the last hour to ask if I could pick up our daughter from preschool. She said she knows she is extremely vulnerable for a relapse today (she's been sober just over a month) and is asking for help. She also called her sponsor and her therapist. She is reaching out and working her program...	usedtobeanyer	4	341	Dec 2, 2011 by Jerry F
	Growth and awareness can be sooo painful (Preview) Of course the Christmas holidays are coming up and I have an 11 yr old daughter and I'm at a crossroads with my spouse. I want her to have an enjoyable holiday with some stability. I've not put any decorations up yet but I would like to for her. It will be a sad thing because of the change in the family dyna...	amills4294	5	471	Dec 2, 2011 by rosielee
	Here I go again on my own! (Preview) etc! I am so thrilled to have a life full of joy! But this morning I puked 5 times & am bleeding from an unusual place! Get me to the doctor quick! No, seriously, I am OK. I need a complete overhaul--time is kinda wearing me down but I get to this library every chance I get to visit w/ all of you out there! I...	Hoot Nanny	1	302	Dec 2, 2011 by rosielee
	trying not to be misleading! (Preview) Just a quick comment: I am not on my own but my comments are my OWN original & sassy! Kathleen	Hoot Nanny	1	568	Dec 2, 2011 by rosielee
	When will he hit rock bottom? (Preview) I am new to this site and get so much comfort from reading everyone's posts. I was dating someone for about a year. When we met he was a recent widower and seemed like a great guy. We lived about 30 miles from each other and only saw each other on weekends. After 4 months I decided to move closer to him and...	FL_Sunshine	7	673	Dec 2, 2011 by FL_Sunshine
	Hero to zero (Preview) It is amazing to me how in a matter of a day or two I went from being, in my AH's eyes, so beautiful and sensational, to now he can barely stand being around me. He hasn't said that, but he has holed himself up, put on the headphones, and won't look me in the eye. When I was the center of his universe a few days a...	danni	7	470	Dec 2, 2011 by danni
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.