Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

but feel like i have been doing 20 yrs before major life change! I am seriously considering leaving my marriage of 20 yrs. Binge drinker AH; we have 3 kids and it's tough for me to decide to make this change. He is a musician and is constantly around booze--that definitely ups the ante! I am trying to l...

Highlyfavored · Highlyfavored

I'm sick with cold symptoms, didn't go to church. A few minutes ago my 26y.o. grandson called and asked me if I could pick him up from the hospital, said he had gone there this morning by ambulance. I told him I was to sick and to call his mother, she is A/A and they don't get alone. I called her after it kep...

parfait624 · parfait624

I haven't been on here in a while. I've been taking time to myself. Detaching from my exABF and trying to live my life in a positive and constructive way. I haven't had a conversation with him in six months and that was also the last time I seen him in person. Our last break up was not a good one. He told m...

km93 · km93

I'm worried my mom has a drinking problem. Every late afternoon/early evening she starts drinking, and usually has about 3 glasses of wine. If you don't say anything to her she's ok, but if you say even the smallest thing to contradict her it sets her off. She starts shouting and being sarcastic and cyn...

glad · glad

God has a plan, it hurts my head with I try to figure it out, he wants me just to trust him... MY mind gets all this 100% ,, MY feelings are a different matter, tears still come sometimes when I don't want them to,, I wish it would stop, it's been a year and a half since he moved out and 9 mths since we stopped eve...

Michelle814 · Michelle814

So I did my step 4-7 a while back and was ready to start moving on but then these character defects come popping up like stubborn weeds. This woman at work has been talking about how much she dislikes me and this really urks me.. I feel like we are in highschool and she is at least twenty years older than me....

GailMichelle · GailMichelle

This website that I share with you today is not Al-Anon. I ran across this website during my initial separation with my now ex-husband (we are now reunited after divorcing). I recall sitting in my sparsely furnishes apartment, early in the morning with my favorite cup of tea, kicking back and viewi...

apesgirl · apesgirl

For the past two days I have been feeling so alone. I finally sat down with my partner what was going on with us. She told me that she has to focus on herself right now, she said she needs to be selfish about her recovery... I have given her nothing but my support and understanding, helping her find meeting p...

MeTwo2 · MeTwo2

Wondering if anyone has ever taken anti-anxiety pills .. It's been several years in my program and I have gotten alot and I still Feel the way I do ..., etc.. The obssessions are still here and sometimes .. I can't shut them off; it's balance in that it's not Just a matter of choice. If I couldn't do it mysel...

vicky7214 · vicky7214

My 17 year old son justed entered rehab for the 3rd time. As you know each time things are worse than the last. I need someone to talk to who I can relate. I have scanned through the topics on this site. Most topics are on A and are with the spouses. Can anybody help

rehprof · rehprof

I'm still reeling from mediation yesterday. Here I am taking care of EVERYTHING...paying ALL the bills...doing all the repairs on the house, working 60 hours a week....and barely making it on my salary (I owe my parents 7k for loans for a new refrig and my divorce lawyer) Meanwhile, my AH has been unem...

stephaniej · stephaniej

On Sunday, after my husband's horrible outburst of Saturday night, he was clearly in a shame spiral. He apologized repeatedly for his behavior (I told him I appreciated his apology, and made it clear I didn't want to keep discussing it over and over again). At one point he asked me "do you still...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

I come here and read daily and not always able to post, but it helps keep my mind straight and I meet with my sponsor one night a week. I have 2 weekly meetings, but lately I have worked those days without going. Now my internet provider went bankrupt it is really sad and no one else is up and running out by me y...

Highlyfavored · Highlyfavored

My 2 adult A/A children both live nearby, as a matter of fact they live together. I'm a retired 71 y.o. woman who live alone and love it. My 16 y.o. grandson just recently moved back home with his mother. My son is on ssi due to a disability, (progressively crippling) he is far from that now. He uses al...

johnmarcia · johnmarcia

Our 17 year old son is a HS junior and will be 18 in May. This year he changed. He smokes pot. Keep sodd hours. Does not clean his room, do his chores, never gets himself up and most upsetting he is very disrespectful to my wife and me. He seems very anxious about college process but doesn't so too much to i...

MelB · MelB

Sometimes, at night, I cry myself to sleep. It used to be because I was worried I couldn't go through another relapse or deal with another lie etc. Now I cry because he's doing better and I'm still sick. That we can't be a "healthy" couple because of me. I didn't even realize I was sick...

GailMichelle · GailMichelle

It's way past my usual bedtime. I'm all wired up from staying up to bake! So here I am on the Net. I ran across a website about what to never regret and it got me thinking about what I never regret. I never regret - - reading to my sons when they were young. I have such good memories of back then. I never reg...

atheos · atheos

Already told my sponsor the "positive traits" part of my step 4... tomorrow's time for the scary part! My list of things to tell my sponsor is ready... 15 things to discuss in all... one character defect I am terrified of discussing, followed by 13 that aren't that hard to admit to, and then o...

Michelle814 · Michelle814

My HP is guiding me to proceed with my passions in life. I used to think what's the point? I used to think if no one read my poetry or saw my photographs or bought my paintings then what was the point? I feel so entirely different now. I am creating for me and for me, alone. A friend once told me "you sh...

MeTwo2 · MeTwo2

So I have shared I have an Intern. I have shared I stopped growing when I began obssessing on the addicts and alcoholics in my life and that for me that was around 5. Seeing how I stayed stuck in feeling 5. My siblings moved out (My parenting came from them) I was alone. For years I thought I was abandoned and...

hotrod · hotrod

Hi MIP Family I have posted the 5 th Step to the Step Work Board one day early Please join us there: http://stepwork.activeboard.com/. It is a powerful experience to read and share your ESH. The Steps are the road to recovery. I heard a quote once (cannot remember the source) it goes like this...

rehprof · rehprof

Divorce is a long process in my state...and this week, on Friday I have mandatory mediation. AH will get (by law) 1/2 my retirement...which he intends to live on since he has not worked in 2 years (he lives with his sister since I told him to leave a year ago november). He tells me he is entitled to alimony (...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

How are you at setting boundaries and how well do you communicate them? I went to dinner with a friend last night and she said the first thing I need to do is forgive. Well, yea, that would probably be helpful, LOL. But, we really spent a lot of time talking about forgiveness and how hard it is for 2 broke...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Winter is finally here! I am frustrated by the fact that it has almost been a week since I have been on here. I am suffering from too much snow & unable to get out much. I haven't been to a decent meeting in a week either. Does anyone out there feel like I do? I was worried that I was going to end up like a bear...

Hope4Peace · Hope4Peace

My AH has been sober nearly one year after drinking since his teenage years. He's had clinical depression for nearly as long, though he was officially diagnosed well into our marriage. He drank despite warnings from his therapist. He stopped seeing the therapist. I admit to years of enabling both th...

Green Eyes · Green Eyes

Since separating from my AH of 29 years, over nine months ago, I have come to realize how I now live my life in the here and now. I went to a concert last night with some friends and I had forgotten now much I enjoy listening to live music. Instead of being preoccupied with thoughts about my AH and his issues,...

rehprof · rehprof

In divorce mediation today My AH and his lawyer not only demanded 1/2 my retirement, but he wants $587 a week in spousal support, and wants me to pay for health insurance for him. My take home is $3500/month...my mortgage and insurance are 1400 -- so with me paying that level of spousal support that leav...

likemyheart · likemyheart

And lots of it. Last night word was out, school was closed today, yippee for the kids and what a snow it was - 8-24 inches depending on where you were and how good your yardstick measured. Spent the day shoveling one place and another, laughing with people as they passed, chatting about how much snow and w...

Pushka · Pushka

LoveWarrior · LoveWarrior

My partner is a 24 year recovering alcoholic. I respect him for his accomplishments and resolve. We've been together for 14 years and have had some rough spots along the way in regards to my consumption of alcohol. It just happened again and I am sick and tired of being berated. Let me explain: When we fi...

db55 · db55

I just got in touch with a friend who I really hadn't been in contact with in about 5-8 years. I became friends with her 30 years ago and was called an aunt to her children who I knew since their births. I lost touch mainly because of her and her husband's drinking at the encouragement of my husband to just...

apesgirl · apesgirl

This is my first time on here. My partner just got out of detox for benzos. She has been going to meetings every night. I'm so very proud of her, and want to help more than anything. She goes to an out patient program so I'm not allowed to go. I have looked in my area for nar-anon meetings but I can't find any. I...

never going back · never going back

A friend sent me this quote a few days ago: "What if you woke up today with only the things you thanked God for yesterday?" I've been doing a lot of 'thanking' ever since I read it. Kind of put things in perspective for me, so I thought I'd share. Have a wonderful day, thankful day! Deni...

White Rabbit · White Rabbit

Hello friends! Just wanted to tell everyone hi. I've been staying busy personally and professionally and not making adequate time for recovery efforts. I'm not struggling, but need to get back with my program while things are good as opposed to waiting for the next crisis! As my sponsor says, &q...

glad · glad

I wrote a long rambling post about my feelings.. then read some of what others are going through.. and decided I have it pretty good, and maybe I need to pray for those who are really struggling today,,, thanks to ALL of us who share no matter how large or small,, you never know how what you say may help some...

MelB · MelB

It's been about a week since I've been on here. I shouldn't have stopped for even those 7 days. I have been having a tough time. I can't figure out how to love myself. I feel so 'xxxx' about myself all the time. I am working towards the future but I feel so lost still. I know that my patterns of thoughts and be...

Autumn0729 · Autumn0729

I am finding that I am really struggling with guilt that I am doing alright. My now ex-boyfriend is 30 days clean, through a live-in rehab program. I spent 5 years with him, taking care of him financiallyand in every other way, completely burning myself out in the process. He was always loving and c...

MidwesternMom · MidwesternMom

I found a meeting that I could attend tonight. It has childcare, so I can bring the kids. I'm really scared about going though. I don't know why. Will everybody there already know eachother? Will I have to tell my whole story? The website says there are special meetings for newcomers. I can't get to...

stephaniej · stephaniej

It's been a rough stretch for me, as my AH's emotional abuse has escalated dramatically over the last two months. But tonight I'm feeling grateful and reflective about many things, and I feel so optimistic about my ability to be healthy, emotionally AND physically. I found this website about a yea...

MidwesternMom · MidwesternMom

I told my AH to leave the house on Sunday. I was so angry because I went to church, only to find that I had no money for the collection basket. He stole all the money from my purse. He was high when I got home. I have 2 little kids and I run a home daycare. I cannot have drugs in my house. I could lose my busin...

Jackie11 · Jackie11

This is something that has been on my mind for weeks. I can keep my side of the street clean. Most things I can hand up to HP, I work to leave them there. My AH and I have a daughter who just turned 3. She lives with her mom during the week and we have her almost every weekend, if not for a full weekend then at leas...

KLotus · KLotus

Again, thank you all for your incredible ESH (and for your research). It is serving me well, and helping me to feel stronger. I met with a divorce lawyer yesterday - to ask questions. She was VERY concerned about my safety. I was a bit embarrassed when asked "is there any domestic violence?&q...

MeTwo2 · MeTwo2

Good morning fellow shippers ? I'm starting an Intern this morning and am nervous. Of course my confidence isn't all that because I put it off for a year and am just now returning. It wasn't waisted time, however, I am feeling the effects of my procrastination in that I've forgotten many things through...

CelinaR · CelinaR

Hi, I am new to the group and never thought that I would need to reach out for something like t his. I have been with my husband for 13 years and married 10. We have two boys and have had a happy life together. About two years ago, my husband seemed to have lost a lot of weight so I urged him to get in for a physi...

LostToday · LostToday

My DH has been clean for 13 months. He has come a long way in a lot of areas. Thanks to Al-anon, I have come a long way in a lot of areas too. However, money is an issue that keeps being a big problem. He works and I stay home. With 4 children, me working and putting kids in daycare is financially out of the q...

wantinganswers · wantinganswers

Hello..I am new to this forum and am hopeing I will be able to get some answers from people who have been through this... My husband and I have been married 18 yrs. He has been an alcoholic since I met him, i just didnt realize it in time. I finally left 2 years ago with our son. He started an out patient reh...

upintheair · upintheair

After 9+years of marriage to a "functional" alcoholic he seems to be a new man. I won't go into the long ugly history now but his recovery started when I had an "exit affair" 6 months ago. My affair devastated me and it has been difficult to come to grips with. On the other hand he say...

Pushka · Pushka

John · John

I've Got This! So my world came crashing down on me.the ground pulled from under my feetI was lost and so heart brokencrying so much, there was no copinThen out of no wherea voice hard to missthundering from the HeavensHe saidChild I've Got this!I've got it under controlI've got your heart here.you...

atheos · atheos

My sponsor and I have agreed that I will not be finishing my Al-Anon 90-90. I can see why it's extremely beneficial for AA members in their early days of sobriety -- keeping them busy with the program gives them less time to revert to old behaviors -- but for me, being super-busy brought back old behavior...

Lindaoakford · Lindaoakford

HI From my bio you will read that I have a few violent past partners. One of those partners still lives in the relatively small city that I live in. He is a local businessman in the same area of building trade that my husband works in. I have often expressed my warnings that if they were ever to run into eac...

MeTwo2 · MeTwo2

I've shared on this before that I had the awareness that the addicts stops growing from the time they started using. What I later had the awareness on was how I quit growing also the second I began obssessing and focusing on the addict/alcoholic (s) instead of me. For me, this was honestly around 5. Wit...

ttpurtee · ttpurtee

My husband is a physically abusive alcoholic. He had to go to the emergency room for a suicide attempt and then to a mental health facility. During this time I ran and got a restraining order. The court dropped the restraining order b/c he was in a mental health facility. Since it has been dropped, h...

double rainbow · double rainbow

I've been looking for a support group for those in relationships with prescription drug addicts. My bf is now in recovery for 8 months after a 3 month stay in rehab. Looking for infor and support with the rollercoaster emotions that go along with it. He was great for 3 months, went back to work and now...

Debilyn · Debilyn

Well, I tripped from my bad leg on the deck over the river. Fell flat hard on my front. Broke my rib again and am sore everywhere. Someone messed up my fence and stole all my gas. Mind you I am way up in the mountains.... Had horrible dreams about my brother. I need ACOBB's. Adult children who had a bad brothe...

Julie3310 · Julie3310

So the other day I expressed a very long post saying: The start of step 1! Finally put an end to living his addiciton! Refuse to live this way! Well I started the process of feeling good and not sad, not mad either. I was a little pissed but I actually have been blanking him out of my head. Well I dont know why...

danni · danni

My 5 year old asked me this just now, and it is breaking my heart. My AH is home, but severly stressed about losing a lot of his work (due to cutbacks), and having ugly feelings that, for today, he is not masking with drinking. He is, however, in a bad mood and snappy. With the children, he has a history of...

atheos · atheos

I feel like I have to do things for people or they won't like me, because I am the weird, shy, awkward fat girl who likes to stay at home and read instead of party, that I'm no fun to be around, and people only put up with me because I do nice things for them and they feel guilty like they have to be nice. I do thing...

smzele · smzele

My husband just admitted to me that he had been using Heroin all day yesterday (for the first time). This admission comes after I continued to ask him about his tracked and bruised arms. He continues longtime suffering from alcoholism and prescription opiate Dependancy. He has been on a 14 month long...

debbiems · debbiems

I am being pressured by my AS to give him money so he can take this girl on a "date" . #1 I don't believe him that it is for a date. #2. I truely have no money to give him. I told him "no" and he won't let it go. He was in his room texting me and just keeps it going . He is so desprete that he ask...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	new here, trying to do 6 mos before major life change.... (Preview) but feel like i have been doing 20 yrs before major life change! I am seriously considering leaving my marriage of 20 yrs. Binge drinker AH; we have 3 kids and it's tough for me to decide to make this change. He is a musician and is constantly around booze--that definitely ups the ante! I am trying to l...	yanksfan51	9	545	Jan 24, 2012 by yanksfan51
	Trying to keep my serenity (Preview) I'm sick with cold symptoms, didn't go to church. A few minutes ago my 26y.o. grandson called and asked me if I could pick him up from the hospital, said he had gone there this morning by ambulance. I told him I was to sick and to call his mother, she is A/A and they don't get alone. I called her after it kep...	Highlyfavored	3	382	Jan 24, 2012 by Highlyfavored
	What is going on?! (Preview) I haven't been on here in a while. I've been taking time to myself. Detaching from my exABF and trying to live my life in a positive and constructive way. I haven't had a conversation with him in six months and that was also the last time I seen him in person. Our last break up was not a good one. He told m...	parfait624	10	875	Jan 24, 2012 by Lindaoakford
	Help with Mom (Preview) I'm worried my mom has a drinking problem. Every late afternoon/early evening she starts drinking, and usually has about 3 glasses of wine. If you don't say anything to her she's ok, but if you say even the smallest thing to contradict her it sets her off. She starts shouting and being sarcastic and cyn...	km93	4	415	Jan 23, 2012 by danni
	As if I can hear God's voice. (Preview) God has a plan, it hurts my head with I try to figure it out, he wants me just to trust him... MY mind gets all this 100% ,, MY feelings are a different matter, tears still come sometimes when I don't want them to,, I wish it would stop, it's been a year and a half since he moved out and 9 mths since we stopped eve...	glad	8	576	Jan 23, 2012 by glad lee
	"someone's opinion of you does not have to become your reality." (Preview) So I did my step 4-7 a while back and was ready to start moving on but then these character defects come popping up like stubborn weeds. This woman at work has been talking about how much she dislikes me and this really urks me.. I feel like we are in highschool and she is at least twenty years older than me....	Michelle814	4	1331	Jan 23, 2012 by Jackie11
	A Nice Website that Reinforces Al-Anon Teachings (Preview) This website that I share with you today is not Al-Anon. I ran across this website during my initial separation with my now ex-husband (we are now reunited after divorcing). I recall sitting in my sparsely furnishes apartment, early in the morning with my favorite cup of tea, kicking back and viewi...	GailMichelle	3	4329	Jan 23, 2012 by sookie
	Feelimg lonley and like I no longer matter (Preview) For the past two days I have been feeling so alone. I finally sat down with my partner what was going on with us. She told me that she has to focus on herself right now, she said she needs to be selfish about her recovery... I have given her nothing but my support and understanding, helping her find meeting p...	apesgirl	7	633	Jan 23, 2012 by glad
	Anyone ever been on Anti_anxiety pills ? (Preview) Wondering if anyone has ever taken anti-anxiety pills .. It's been several years in my program and I have gotten alot and I still Feel the way I do ..., etc.. The obssessions are still here and sometimes .. I can't shut them off; it's balance in that it's not Just a matter of choice. If I couldn't do it mysel...	MeTwo2	5	492	Jan 23, 2012 by Lindaoakford
	Help (Preview) My 17 year old son justed entered rehab for the 3rd time. As you know each time things are worse than the last. I need someone to talk to who I can relate. I have scanned through the topics on this site. Most topics are on A and are with the spouses. Can anybody help	vicky7214	3	467	Jan 22, 2012 by pinkchip
	How long before he can't hurt me anymore? (Preview) I'm still reeling from mediation yesterday. Here I am taking care of EVERYTHING...paying ALL the bills...doing all the repairs on the house, working 60 hours a week....and barely making it on my salary (I owe my parents 7k for loans for a new refrig and my divorce lawyer) Meanwhile, my AH has been unem...	rehprof	9	648	Jan 22, 2012 by kael1539
	"Do you still want to be married to me?" (Preview) On Sunday, after my husband's horrible outburst of Saturday night, he was clearly in a shame spiral. He apologized repeatedly for his behavior (I told him I appreciated his apology, and made it clear I didn't want to keep discussing it over and over again). At one point he asked me "do you still...	stephaniej	8	842	Jan 22, 2012 by yanksfan51
	I will be without internet for awhile and am worried (Preview) I come here and read daily and not always able to post, but it helps keep my mind straight and I meet with my sponsor one night a week. I have 2 weekly meetings, but lately I have worked those days without going. Now my internet provider went bankrupt it is really sad and no one else is up and running out by me y...	Breakingfree	5	433	Jan 22, 2012 by Debilyn
	What is wrong with this picture? (Preview) My 2 adult A/A children both live nearby, as a matter of fact they live together. I'm a retired 71 y.o. woman who live alone and love it. My 16 y.o. grandson just recently moved back home with his mother. My son is on ssi due to a disability, (progressively crippling) he is far from that now. He uses al...	Highlyfavored	3	893	Jan 22, 2012 by Debilyn
	What boundaries for a 17 year old son (Preview) Our 17 year old son is a HS junior and will be 18 in May. This year he changed. He smokes pot. Keep sodd hours. Does not clean his room, do his chores, never gets himself up and most upsetting he is very disrespectful to my wife and me. He seems very anxious about college process but doesn't so too much to i...	johnmarcia	4	1317	Jan 22, 2012 by Debilyn
	I need to express myself AGAIN (Preview) Sometimes, at night, I cry myself to sleep. It used to be because I was worried I couldn't go through another relapse or deal with another lie etc. Now I cry because he's doing better and I'm still sick. That we can't be a "healthy" couple because of me. I didn't even realize I was sick...	MelB	8	489	Jan 22, 2012 by Debilyn
	Never Regret (Preview) It's way past my usual bedtime. I'm all wired up from staying up to bake! So here I am on the Net. I ran across a website about what to never regret and it got me thinking about what I never regret. I never regret - - reading to my sons when they were young. I have such good memories of back then. I never reg...	GailMichelle	3	796	Jan 22, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Doing step 5 tomorrow... (Preview) Already told my sponsor the "positive traits" part of my step 4... tomorrow's time for the scary part! My list of things to tell my sponsor is ready... 15 things to discuss in all... one character defect I am terrified of discussing, followed by 13 that aren't that hard to admit to, and then o...	atheos	4	402	Jan 22, 2012 by Pushka
	I'm the Love of my Life (Preview) My HP is guiding me to proceed with my passions in life. I used to think what's the point? I used to think if no one read my poetry or saw my photographs or bought my paintings then what was the point? I feel so entirely different now. I am creating for me and for me, alone. A friend once told me "you sh...	Michelle814	10	705	Jan 22, 2012 by Michelle814
	Obssession & frozen fear (Ideals) Inner child (Preview) So I have shared I have an Intern. I have shared I stopped growing when I began obssessing on the addicts and alcoholics in my life and that for me that was around 5. Seeing how I stayed stuck in feeling 5. My siblings moved out (My parenting came from them) I was alone. For years I thought I was abandoned and...	MeTwo2	6	921	Jan 21, 2012 by lightblue2
	5th Step (Preview) Hi MIP Family I have posted the 5 th Step to the Step Work Board one day early Please join us there: http://stepwork.activeboard.com/. It is a powerful experience to read and share your ESH. The Steps are the road to recovery. I heard a quote once (cannot remember the source) it goes like this...	hotrod	1	313	Jan 21, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Lawyer today (Preview) Divorce is a long process in my state...and this week, on Friday I have mandatory mediation. AH will get (by law) 1/2 my retirement...which he intends to live on since he has not worked in 2 years (he lives with his sister since I told him to leave a year ago november). He tells me he is entitled to alimony (...	rehprof	12	580	Jan 21, 2012 by stopandchat
	Boundaries and communication (Preview) How are you at setting boundaries and how well do you communicate them? I went to dinner with a friend last night and she said the first thing I need to do is forgive. Well, yea, that would probably be helpful, LOL. But, we really spent a lot of time talking about forgiveness and how hard it is for 2 broke...	ilovedogs	11	923	Jan 21, 2012 by likemyheart
	do you feel like I do! (Preview) Winter is finally here! I am frustrated by the fact that it has almost been a week since I have been on here. I am suffering from too much snow & unable to get out much. I haven't been to a decent meeting in a week either. Does anyone out there feel like I do? I was worried that I was going to end up like a bear...	Hoot Nanny	0	340	Jan 21, 2012 by Hoot Nanny
	Sober Alcoholic with Depression (Preview) My AH has been sober nearly one year after drinking since his teenage years. He's had clinical depression for nearly as long, though he was officially diagnosed well into our marriage. He drank despite warnings from his therapist. He stopped seeing the therapist. I admit to years of enabling both th...	Hope4Peace	7	675	Jan 21, 2012 by Hope4Peace
	Living in the Here and Now serenity separation (Preview) Since separating from my AH of 29 years, over nine months ago, I have come to realize how I now live my life in the here and now. I went to a concert last night with some friends and I had forgotten now much I enjoy listening to live music. Instead of being preoccupied with thoughts about my AH and his issues,...	Green Eyes	4	6086	Jan 21, 2012 by Pushka
	Devastated and scared (Preview) In divorce mediation today My AH and his lawyer not only demanded 1/2 my retirement, but he wants $587 a week in spousal support, and wants me to pay for health insurance for him. My take home is $3500/month...my mortgage and insurance are 1400 -- so with me paying that level of spousal support that leav...	rehprof	10	574	Jan 21, 2012 by rara avis
	SNOW! (Preview) And lots of it. Last night word was out, school was closed today, yippee for the kids and what a snow it was - 8-24 inches depending on where you were and how good your yardstick measured. Spent the day shoveling one place and another, laughing with people as they passed, chatting about how much snow and w...	likemyheart	10	620	Jan 21, 2012 by Hoot Nanny
	Two weeks! (Preview)	Pushka	4	362	Jan 21, 2012 by Pushka
	How do I deal with an alcoholic who wants me to stop consuming alchohol? (Preview) My partner is a 24 year recovering alcoholic. I respect him for his accomplishments and resolve. We've been together for 14 years and have had some rough spots along the way in regards to my consumption of alcohol. It just happened again and I am sick and tired of being berated. Let me explain: When we fi...	LoveWarrior	30	1099	Jan 21, 2012 by tired of trying
	Wondering if I can or should do anything to help.... (Preview) I just got in touch with a friend who I really hadn't been in contact with in about 5-8 years. I became friends with her 30 years ago and was called an aunt to her children who I knew since their births. I lost touch mainly because of her and her husband's drinking at the encouragement of my husband to just...	db55	5	516	Jan 20, 2012 by Breakingfree
	new to it all (Preview) This is my first time on here. My partner just got out of detox for benzos. She has been going to meetings every night. I'm so very proud of her, and want to help more than anything. She goes to an out patient program so I'm not allowed to go. I have looked in my area for nar-anon meetings but I can't find any. I...	apesgirl	6	525	Jan 20, 2012 by apesgirl
	What if......, (Preview) A friend sent me this quote a few days ago: "What if you woke up today with only the things you thanked God for yesterday?" I've been doing a lot of 'thanking' ever since I read it. Kind of put things in perspective for me, so I thought I'd share. Have a wonderful day, thankful day! Deni...	never going back	4	349	Jan 20, 2012 by Jerry F
	Just popping in to say hey :) (Preview) Hello friends! Just wanted to tell everyone hi. I've been staying busy personally and professionally and not making adequate time for recovery efforts. I'm not struggling, but need to get back with my program while things are good as opposed to waiting for the next crisis! As my sponsor says, &q...	White Rabbit	5	349	Jan 20, 2012 by Jerry F
	rollercoaster remedy anyone? (Preview) I wrote a long rambling post about my feelings.. then read some of what others are going through.. and decided I have it pretty good, and maybe I need to pray for those who are really struggling today,,, thanks to ALL of us who share no matter how large or small,, you never know how what you say may help some...	glad	5	461	Jan 20, 2012 by Jerry F
	My self worth (Preview) It's been about a week since I've been on here. I shouldn't have stopped for even those 7 days. I have been having a tough time. I can't figure out how to love myself. I feel so 'xxxx' about myself all the time. I am working towards the future but I feel so lost still. I know that my patterns of thoughts and be...	MelB	7	434	Jan 20, 2012 by rehprof
	The Guilt of being OK (Preview) I am finding that I am really struggling with guilt that I am doing alright. My now ex-boyfriend is 30 days clean, through a live-in rehab program. I spent 5 years with him, taking care of him financiallyand in every other way, completely burning myself out in the process. He was always loving and c...	Autumn0729	5	583	Jan 20, 2012 by Iris lover of dogs
	Really Scared of My First Meeting (Preview) I found a meeting that I could attend tonight. It has childcare, so I can bring the kids. I'm really scared about going though. I don't know why. Will everybody there already know eachother? Will I have to tell my whole story? The website says there are special meetings for newcomers. I can't get to...	MidwesternMom	18	746	Jan 20, 2012 by ythannah
	Multiple Rock Bottoms (Preview) It's been a rough stretch for me, as my AH's emotional abuse has escalated dramatically over the last two months. But tonight I'm feeling grateful and reflective about many things, and I feel so optimistic about my ability to be healthy, emotionally AND physically. I found this website about a yea...	stephaniej	4	404	Jan 19, 2012 by White Rabbit
	Not Sure He Should Come Home Yet (Preview) I told my AH to leave the house on Sunday. I was so angry because I went to church, only to find that I had no money for the collection basket. He stole all the money from my purse. He was high when I got home. I have 2 little kids and I run a home daycare. I cannot have drugs in my house. I could lose my busin...	MidwesternMom	9	676	Jan 19, 2012 by White Rabbit
	When to say something (Preview) This is something that has been on my mind for weeks. I can keep my side of the street clean. Most things I can hand up to HP, I work to leave them there. My AH and I have a daughter who just turned 3. She lives with her mom during the week and we have her almost every weekend, if not for a full weekend then at leas...	Jackie11	18	1894	Jan 19, 2012 by Jackie11
	Update! (Preview) Again, thank you all for your incredible ESH (and for your research). It is serving me well, and helping me to feel stronger. I met with a divorce lawyer yesterday - to ask questions. She was VERY concerned about my safety. I was a bit embarrassed when asked "is there any domestic violence?&q...	KLotus	6	483	Jan 19, 2012 by rara avis
	Intern and judgments .. (Preview) Good morning fellow shippers ? I'm starting an Intern this morning and am nervous. Of course my confidence isn't all that because I put it off for a year and am just now returning. It wasn't waisted time, however, I am feeling the effects of my procrastination in that I've forgotten many things through...	MeTwo2	3	512	Jan 19, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Husband Hiding Alcohol (Preview) Hi, I am new to the group and never thought that I would need to reach out for something like t his. I have been with my husband for 13 years and married 10. We have two boys and have had a happy life together. About two years ago, my husband seemed to have lost a lot of weight so I urged him to get in for a physi...	CelinaR	16	8277	Jan 19, 2012 by Pushka
	I do not want to enable.... (Preview) My DH has been clean for 13 months. He has come a long way in a lot of areas. Thanks to Al-anon, I have come a long way in a lot of areas too. However, money is an issue that keeps being a big problem. He works and I stay home. With 4 children, me working and putting kids in daycare is financially out of the q...	LostToday	8	1964	Jan 19, 2012 by Pushka
	Alcoholic husband in recovery (Preview) Hello..I am new to this forum and am hopeing I will be able to get some answers from people who have been through this... My husband and I have been married 18 yrs. He has been an alcoholic since I met him, i just didnt realize it in time. I finally left 2 years ago with our son. He started an out patient reh...	wantinganswers	17	909	Jan 19, 2012 by wantinganswers
	H is recovering…Y can't I? Help…. (Preview) After 9+years of marriage to a "functional" alcoholic he seems to be a new man. I won't go into the long ugly history now but his recovery started when I had an "exit affair" 6 months ago. My affair devastated me and it has been difficult to come to grips with. On the other hand he say...	upintheair	14	645	Jan 19, 2012 by Seahorse
	Changing the things I can (Preview)	Pushka	5	742	Jan 19, 2012 by hotrod
	I've Got This! (Preview) I've Got This! So my world came crashing down on me.the ground pulled from under my feetI was lost and so heart brokencrying so much, there was no copinThen out of no wherea voice hard to missthundering from the HeavensHe saidChild I've Got this!I've got it under controlI've got your heart here.you...	John	4	438	Jan 19, 2012 by Debilyn
	90-90 (Preview) My sponsor and I have agreed that I will not be finishing my Al-Anon 90-90. I can see why it's extremely beneficial for AA members in their early days of sobriety -- keeping them busy with the program gives them less time to revert to old behaviors -- but for me, being super-busy brought back old behavior...	atheos	5	925	Jan 19, 2012 by hotrod
	feel my past is hauting me (Preview) HI From my bio you will read that I have a few violent past partners. One of those partners still lives in the relatively small city that I live in. He is a local businessman in the same area of building trade that my husband works in. I have often expressed my warnings that if they were ever to run into eac...	Lindaoakford	5	668	Jan 19, 2012 by Lindaoakford
	Growth / Stagnant Growth (Preview) I've shared on this before that I had the awareness that the addicts stops growing from the time they started using. What I later had the awareness on was how I quit growing also the second I began obssessing and focusing on the addict/alcoholic (s) instead of me. For me, this was honestly around 5. Wit...	MeTwo2	7	554	Jan 18, 2012 by glad lee
	husband (Preview) My husband is a physically abusive alcoholic. He had to go to the emergency room for a suicide attempt and then to a mental health facility. During this time I ran and got a restraining order. The court dropped the restraining order b/c he was in a mental health facility. Since it has been dropped, h...	ttpurtee	5	670	Jan 18, 2012 by Jerry F
	Support (Preview) I've been looking for a support group for those in relationships with prescription drug addicts. My bf is now in recovery for 8 months after a 3 month stay in rehab. Looking for infor and support with the rollercoaster emotions that go along with it. He was great for 3 months, went back to work and now...	double rainbow	6	473	Jan 17, 2012 by double rainbow
	ugh (Preview) Well, I tripped from my bad leg on the deck over the river. Fell flat hard on my front. Broke my rib again and am sore everywhere. Someone messed up my fence and stole all my gas. Mind you I am way up in the mountains.... Had horrible dreams about my brother. I need ACOBB's. Adult children who had a bad brothe...	Debilyn	14	506	Jan 17, 2012 by Debilyn
	Disturbing phone call! (Preview) So the other day I expressed a very long post saying: The start of step 1! Finally put an end to living his addiciton! Refuse to live this way! Well I started the process of feeling good and not sad, not mad either. I was a little pissed but I actually have been blanking him out of my head. Well I dont know why...	Julie3310	4	688	Jan 17, 2012 by Julie3310
	"Why is Daddy being so mean?" (Preview) My 5 year old asked me this just now, and it is breaking my heart. My AH is home, but severly stressed about losing a lot of his work (due to cutbacks), and having ugly feelings that, for today, he is not masking with drinking. He is, however, in a bad mood and snappy. With the children, he has a history of...	danni	7	488	Jan 17, 2012 by danni
	I wish I could believe this gets better (Preview) I feel like I have to do things for people or they won't like me, because I am the weird, shy, awkward fat girl who likes to stay at home and read instead of party, that I'm no fun to be around, and people only put up with me because I do nice things for them and they feel guilty like they have to be nice. I do thing...	atheos	13	669	Jan 17, 2012 by atheos
	keeping secrets of the one who's sick (Preview) My husband just admitted to me that he had been using Heroin all day yesterday (for the first time). This admission comes after I continued to ask him about his tracked and bruised arms. He continues longtime suffering from alcoholism and prescription opiate Dependancy. He has been on a 14 month long...	smzele	15	1164	Jan 17, 2012 by Michelle814
	holding to my boundries (Preview) I am being pressured by my AS to give him money so he can take this girl on a "date" . #1 I don't believe him that it is for a date. #2. I truely have no money to give him. I told him "no" and he won't let it go. He was in his room texting me and just keeps it going . He is so desprete that he ask...	debbiems	5	516	Jan 17, 2012 by pinkchip
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.