Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

LoveWarrior · LoveWarrior

My partner is a 24 year recovering alcoholic. I respect him for his accomplishments and resolve. We've been together for 14 years and have had some rough spots along the way in regards to my consumption of alcohol. It just happened again and I am sick and tired of being berated. Let me explain: When we fi...

db55 · db55

I just got in touch with a friend who I really hadn't been in contact with in about 5-8 years. I became friends with her 30 years ago and was called an aunt to her children who I knew since their births. I lost touch mainly because of her and her husband's drinking at the encouragement of my husband to just...

apesgirl · apesgirl

This is my first time on here. My partner just got out of detox for benzos. She has been going to meetings every night. I'm so very proud of her, and want to help more than anything. She goes to an out patient program so I'm not allowed to go. I have looked in my area for nar-anon meetings but I can't find any. I...

never going back · never going back

A friend sent me this quote a few days ago: "What if you woke up today with only the things you thanked God for yesterday?" I've been doing a lot of 'thanking' ever since I read it. Kind of put things in perspective for me, so I thought I'd share. Have a wonderful day, thankful day! Deni...

White Rabbit · White Rabbit

Hello friends! Just wanted to tell everyone hi. I've been staying busy personally and professionally and not making adequate time for recovery efforts. I'm not struggling, but need to get back with my program while things are good as opposed to waiting for the next crisis! As my sponsor says, &q...

glad · glad

I wrote a long rambling post about my feelings.. then read some of what others are going through.. and decided I have it pretty good, and maybe I need to pray for those who are really struggling today,,, thanks to ALL of us who share no matter how large or small,, you never know how what you say may help some...

MelB · MelB

It's been about a week since I've been on here. I shouldn't have stopped for even those 7 days. I have been having a tough time. I can't figure out how to love myself. I feel so 'xxxx' about myself all the time. I am working towards the future but I feel so lost still. I know that my patterns of thoughts and be...

Autumn0729 · Autumn0729

I am finding that I am really struggling with guilt that I am doing alright. My now ex-boyfriend is 30 days clean, through a live-in rehab program. I spent 5 years with him, taking care of him financiallyand in every other way, completely burning myself out in the process. He was always loving and c...

MidwesternMom · MidwesternMom

I found a meeting that I could attend tonight. It has childcare, so I can bring the kids. I'm really scared about going though. I don't know why. Will everybody there already know eachother? Will I have to tell my whole story? The website says there are special meetings for newcomers. I can't get to...

stephaniej · stephaniej

It's been a rough stretch for me, as my AH's emotional abuse has escalated dramatically over the last two months. But tonight I'm feeling grateful and reflective about many things, and I feel so optimistic about my ability to be healthy, emotionally AND physically. I found this website about a yea...

MidwesternMom · MidwesternMom

I told my AH to leave the house on Sunday. I was so angry because I went to church, only to find that I had no money for the collection basket. He stole all the money from my purse. He was high when I got home. I have 2 little kids and I run a home daycare. I cannot have drugs in my house. I could lose my busin...

Jackie11 · Jackie11

This is something that has been on my mind for weeks. I can keep my side of the street clean. Most things I can hand up to HP, I work to leave them there. My AH and I have a daughter who just turned 3. She lives with her mom during the week and we have her almost every weekend, if not for a full weekend then at leas...

KLotus · KLotus

Again, thank you all for your incredible ESH (and for your research). It is serving me well, and helping me to feel stronger. I met with a divorce lawyer yesterday - to ask questions. She was VERY concerned about my safety. I was a bit embarrassed when asked "is there any domestic violence?&q...

MeTwo2 · MeTwo2

Good morning fellow shippers ? I'm starting an Intern this morning and am nervous. Of course my confidence isn't all that because I put it off for a year and am just now returning. It wasn't waisted time, however, I am feeling the effects of my procrastination in that I've forgotten many things through...

CelinaR · CelinaR

Hi, I am new to the group and never thought that I would need to reach out for something like t his. I have been with my husband for 13 years and married 10. We have two boys and have had a happy life together. About two years ago, my husband seemed to have lost a lot of weight so I urged him to get in for a physi...

LostToday · LostToday

My DH has been clean for 13 months. He has come a long way in a lot of areas. Thanks to Al-anon, I have come a long way in a lot of areas too. However, money is an issue that keeps being a big problem. He works and I stay home. With 4 children, me working and putting kids in daycare is financially out of the q...

wantinganswers · wantinganswers

Hello..I am new to this forum and am hopeing I will be able to get some answers from people who have been through this... My husband and I have been married 18 yrs. He has been an alcoholic since I met him, i just didnt realize it in time. I finally left 2 years ago with our son. He started an out patient reh...

upintheair · upintheair

After 9+years of marriage to a "functional" alcoholic he seems to be a new man. I won't go into the long ugly history now but his recovery started when I had an "exit affair" 6 months ago. My affair devastated me and it has been difficult to come to grips with. On the other hand he say...

Pushka · Pushka

John · John

I've Got This! So my world came crashing down on me.the ground pulled from under my feetI was lost and so heart brokencrying so much, there was no copinThen out of no wherea voice hard to missthundering from the HeavensHe saidChild I've Got this!I've got it under controlI've got your heart here.you...

atheos · atheos

My sponsor and I have agreed that I will not be finishing my Al-Anon 90-90. I can see why it's extremely beneficial for AA members in their early days of sobriety -- keeping them busy with the program gives them less time to revert to old behaviors -- but for me, being super-busy brought back old behavior...

Lindaoakford · Lindaoakford

HI From my bio you will read that I have a few violent past partners. One of those partners still lives in the relatively small city that I live in. He is a local businessman in the same area of building trade that my husband works in. I have often expressed my warnings that if they were ever to run into eac...

MeTwo2 · MeTwo2

I've shared on this before that I had the awareness that the addicts stops growing from the time they started using. What I later had the awareness on was how I quit growing also the second I began obssessing and focusing on the addict/alcoholic (s) instead of me. For me, this was honestly around 5. Wit...

ttpurtee · ttpurtee

My husband is a physically abusive alcoholic. He had to go to the emergency room for a suicide attempt and then to a mental health facility. During this time I ran and got a restraining order. The court dropped the restraining order b/c he was in a mental health facility. Since it has been dropped, h...

double rainbow · double rainbow

I've been looking for a support group for those in relationships with prescription drug addicts. My bf is now in recovery for 8 months after a 3 month stay in rehab. Looking for infor and support with the rollercoaster emotions that go along with it. He was great for 3 months, went back to work and now...

Debilyn · Debilyn

Well, I tripped from my bad leg on the deck over the river. Fell flat hard on my front. Broke my rib again and am sore everywhere. Someone messed up my fence and stole all my gas. Mind you I am way up in the mountains.... Had horrible dreams about my brother. I need ACOBB's. Adult children who had a bad brothe...

Julie3310 · Julie3310

So the other day I expressed a very long post saying: The start of step 1! Finally put an end to living his addiciton! Refuse to live this way! Well I started the process of feeling good and not sad, not mad either. I was a little pissed but I actually have been blanking him out of my head. Well I dont know why...

danni · danni

My 5 year old asked me this just now, and it is breaking my heart. My AH is home, but severly stressed about losing a lot of his work (due to cutbacks), and having ugly feelings that, for today, he is not masking with drinking. He is, however, in a bad mood and snappy. With the children, he has a history of...

atheos · atheos

I feel like I have to do things for people or they won't like me, because I am the weird, shy, awkward fat girl who likes to stay at home and read instead of party, that I'm no fun to be around, and people only put up with me because I do nice things for them and they feel guilty like they have to be nice. I do thing...

smzele · smzele

My husband just admitted to me that he had been using Heroin all day yesterday (for the first time). This admission comes after I continued to ask him about his tracked and bruised arms. He continues longtime suffering from alcoholism and prescription opiate Dependancy. He has been on a 14 month long...

debbiems · debbiems

I am being pressured by my AS to give him money so he can take this girl on a "date" . #1 I don't believe him that it is for a date. #2. I truely have no money to give him. I told him "no" and he won't let it go. He was in his room texting me and just keeps it going . He is so desprete that he ask...

Michelle814 · Michelle814

Well.. I took a day off work Friday for a spiritual day. Every sign I fell upon was my HP telling me that it is okay to live a little. As in I heard this tale of a man who asks a monk... "If I meditate for 6 hours a day how soon will I reach spiritual enlightenment?" The monk responds "ten yea...

John · John

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sarebaer · sarebaer

Last night my friend's ah shot and killed her while her two babies slept! This is so unreal, such a tragedy. I know she was trying to separate herself from him but was torn because of the kids, and had said he was "rarely" violent. There were so many red flags, and I tried to be there for her when s...

HoofnIt · HoofnIt

I have told my Abf several times now that if he drinks do not come home just stay with who ever you are drinking with. But every night he drinks and then drives home or calls me to come get him. Well I am done with it. I am serious I do not want him in my house if he has been drinking. Its eaither drink or live here...

NumbandAngry · NumbandAngry

My mother is an alcoholic. She has had serveral relapses since first getting sober when I was 15. I am now 35, I am married, have three great kids. My mom lived with us for about 7 years and in Jan 2011 moved into her own apartment, my two youngest, ages 8 and 9, spend most weekends with her. Until last n...

stephaniej · stephaniej

This weekend was my husband's weekend. Last night we went to a concert (tickets were my Xmas gift to him), and today he went to a fan convention for his favorite sports team (tickets were the kids' Xmas gift to him). We had a great time at the concert, and he had a wonderful time at the convention today. ...

SnowRavenX · SnowRavenX

My alcoholic roommate "Ron" is a good friend and has been living with us for 6 months. Ron and I both rent rooms from my best (and lifelong) friend "James" who owns the house, and there is no written lease for either of us. We are all 30 yr old bachelors. Previously, James and I lived...

rara avis · rara avis

Hey everybody, Just wanted to say that I've been doing a lot of writing lately [ big presentation ] hence I have not felt like writing much besides that. So I've been lurking, been reading a lot of posts, nodding or shaking my head where appropriate, and have wanted to send support to every single one...

Lindaoakford · Lindaoakford

For those of you who may remember.... I was a little concerned and really employed the One Day At A Time thing this weekend. I thought my husband would contact friends of his who are in town due to a personal family medical emergency. They are major pot smokers. I decided that no matter what, I have thing...

Pushka · Pushka

sparky60 · sparky60

My siginificant other and I joined forces in business almost 4 years ago. She's the licensed professional, and I'm the marketing guy. Despite her 4th stage alcoholism, we've been able to grow the business successfully, and we're set to have the best year ever. I finally became wise enough to try alan...

Very Very Tired · Very Very Tired

Regardless of whether I turn right or turn left, I will still end up where I need to be. It's OK to enjoy the journey and stop worrying about the destination. Looking back at my life, everything was leading to me being right where I am now. I took a lot of different turns, but I still ended up here. And here...

danni · danni

First of all, thanks everyone for all your support. It was immensely helpful. My AH came home last night. He called in the afternoon, and I told him I was uncomfortable not knowing where he was and what his plan was. He said he was coming home. So he did, gave me a hug, said he missed us, and i felt...su...

GailMichelle · GailMichelle

Hi All, I jus0t got re-connected with my Internet provider. It's been around 3 weeks without service. First, my laptop had to be sent to Dell for repair. Coffee, cream and sugar were accidently spilt on it. That took about 2 and a half weeks to get it back and $360 (ouch!) Then, my re-connection was de...

Peace33 · Peace33

Hello everyone...I'm new to the forum & am so happy to have found it! It's so frustrating when people don't unstand what you're going through. I tried an Al-Anon meeting once, about 4 yrs ago. But, I didn't think it was for me. I had a hard time w/ it because it made me feel like I was the alcoholic....

Peace33 · Peace33

I'm going to my sister's to do her hair soon & I don't know what expression to have on my face, or how to behave anymore! We've been through this rollercoaster so many times, I'm confused between trying to do the right thing & of knowing how to help her & myself. I'm tired of having to walk on...

AusRat · AusRat

Hi all. This is my first post and I am new to Alanon (5 weeks). I don't have a sponsor as yet to ask this question. Although I was uncomfortable with it, I left my fiancé to drink with my work friends at a barbecue last night whilst I went to work. She is aware that situation makes me uncomfortable and upon lea...

Yllek · Yllek

Readers Digest version: Been in Alanon since 2003, changed my life in so many positive ways (I should write a book), have an active healthy life. Married a terrific guy Dec 2010, have a dream honeymoon, happy life on our busy little ranch, perfect right! Oct 2011, I am at a stop in my little corolla waiti...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am open to the posibilities today. I hope for only the best & sometimes expect the worst. The program has taught me to face fears & accept the things I cannot change. I have noticed that lately there are a lot of things I cannot change. The are no absolutes in this that I can see. The only thing con...

Lindaoakford · Lindaoakford

ok, I got hold of a few facebook photos to put onhere. I have chosen things that make me smile today...... My big cat's name is Colin and he is now 13 years old. the big black dog is my husbands dog and she is not allowed near the little ones or she will eat them.... the flowers are a sample of the type of thing...

odalis · odalis

Although I have accepted my AH is SICK. He is mentally sick and he is an alcoholic. My neighbor just had a baby. He wants to act all lovey dovey with me and start talking about how nice it would be to have a baby at home. Ababy of our own. I just feel so angry with him I want to cry. Angry that we couldn't have one m...

danni · danni

After expressing that he felt overwhelmed and lost, my occasionally drinking AH said he wanted to take a break for a few days. I said (I was prepared this time) , "if that's what you feel you need to do". I used to plead and talk him into staying. So within half an hour he left. He woudn't tell me w...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

As I am sitting here I don't have a plan what I want to say. I noticed today that my family ties are really severed. I guess if I want to I can piece them back together. I am only responsible for what I can do these days. I have a cousin who I would like to reconnect w/ some day. I have family who seems distant at so...

MeTwo2 · MeTwo2

Starting my intern next week and have one class to take on the side to accompany it. I'm having a hard time going back to finish college; I took a year off that was Much needed. Now, however, I am looking at things and recognising I have to work for someone. I am still dealing with the area of authority figur...

KLotus · KLotus

Thank you to all who've responded. You are amazing. Truly. Below are answers to some questions, and an update about an incident last night To answer some questions: My AH went into rehab last May-June. He got out, did some AA for about 8 weeks (at best), and ditched. Then he went to couseling, ditc...

Julie3310 · Julie3310

The other day I wrote a post on how do i end things. Should I visit him or not. I already mentally prepared myself that this relationship is over. After a year of cheating, lying and instance of physical abuse and taking a hard hit financially with this person and sticking with him through the 1t time in ja...

glad lee · glad lee

Recovery is civil war, but it is a war that can be won. --Sister Imelda How often do we hear people say, "Sure, I know it's the right thing to do - but it's easier said than done!'' But "it," whatever "it" is for each of us, is actually easier done than not done. As hard as it is t...

stopandchat · stopandchat

I have really regressed in my recovery. I hate my soon-to-be ex-AH so much, and I am so full of resentments. I've been going to extra meetings, but it hasn't really helped yet. I posted before that I am divorcing my AH. He's been clean for about 15 months, but not really working a program of recovery. And,...

GettingStronger · GettingStronger

After 2 years of living apart, ultimately ending in divorce, my ex-husband still begs me to give him another chance. We struggled through 8 years of dealing with his drinking before his violent rampages sent bricks and benches through my windows while I rushed to hide with our 3 yr old. After a DUI he w...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	How do I deal with an alcoholic who wants me to stop consuming alchohol? (Preview) My partner is a 24 year recovering alcoholic. I respect him for his accomplishments and resolve. We've been together for 14 years and have had some rough spots along the way in regards to my consumption of alcohol. It just happened again and I am sick and tired of being berated. Let me explain: When we fi...	LoveWarrior	30	1026	Jan 21, 2012 by tired of trying
	Wondering if I can or should do anything to help.... (Preview) I just got in touch with a friend who I really hadn't been in contact with in about 5-8 years. I became friends with her 30 years ago and was called an aunt to her children who I knew since their births. I lost touch mainly because of her and her husband's drinking at the encouragement of my husband to just...	db55	5	450	Jan 20, 2012 by Breakingfree
	new to it all (Preview) This is my first time on here. My partner just got out of detox for benzos. She has been going to meetings every night. I'm so very proud of her, and want to help more than anything. She goes to an out patient program so I'm not allowed to go. I have looked in my area for nar-anon meetings but I can't find any. I...	apesgirl	6	454	Jan 20, 2012 by apesgirl
	What if......, (Preview) A friend sent me this quote a few days ago: "What if you woke up today with only the things you thanked God for yesterday?" I've been doing a lot of 'thanking' ever since I read it. Kind of put things in perspective for me, so I thought I'd share. Have a wonderful day, thankful day! Deni...	never going back	4	274	Jan 20, 2012 by Jerry F
	Just popping in to say hey :) (Preview) Hello friends! Just wanted to tell everyone hi. I've been staying busy personally and professionally and not making adequate time for recovery efforts. I'm not struggling, but need to get back with my program while things are good as opposed to waiting for the next crisis! As my sponsor says, &q...	White Rabbit	5	283	Jan 20, 2012 by Jerry F
	rollercoaster remedy anyone? (Preview) I wrote a long rambling post about my feelings.. then read some of what others are going through.. and decided I have it pretty good, and maybe I need to pray for those who are really struggling today,,, thanks to ALL of us who share no matter how large or small,, you never know how what you say may help some...	glad	5	391	Jan 20, 2012 by Jerry F
	My self worth (Preview) It's been about a week since I've been on here. I shouldn't have stopped for even those 7 days. I have been having a tough time. I can't figure out how to love myself. I feel so 'xxxx' about myself all the time. I am working towards the future but I feel so lost still. I know that my patterns of thoughts and be...	MelB	7	367	Jan 20, 2012 by rehprof
	The Guilt of being OK (Preview) I am finding that I am really struggling with guilt that I am doing alright. My now ex-boyfriend is 30 days clean, through a live-in rehab program. I spent 5 years with him, taking care of him financiallyand in every other way, completely burning myself out in the process. He was always loving and c...	Autumn0729	5	514	Jan 20, 2012 by Iris lover of dogs
	Really Scared of My First Meeting (Preview) I found a meeting that I could attend tonight. It has childcare, so I can bring the kids. I'm really scared about going though. I don't know why. Will everybody there already know eachother? Will I have to tell my whole story? The website says there are special meetings for newcomers. I can't get to...	MidwesternMom	18	684	Jan 20, 2012 by ythannah
	Multiple Rock Bottoms (Preview) It's been a rough stretch for me, as my AH's emotional abuse has escalated dramatically over the last two months. But tonight I'm feeling grateful and reflective about many things, and I feel so optimistic about my ability to be healthy, emotionally AND physically. I found this website about a yea...	stephaniej	4	334	Jan 19, 2012 by White Rabbit
	Not Sure He Should Come Home Yet (Preview) I told my AH to leave the house on Sunday. I was so angry because I went to church, only to find that I had no money for the collection basket. He stole all the money from my purse. He was high when I got home. I have 2 little kids and I run a home daycare. I cannot have drugs in my house. I could lose my busin...	MidwesternMom	9	605	Jan 19, 2012 by White Rabbit
	When to say something (Preview) This is something that has been on my mind for weeks. I can keep my side of the street clean. Most things I can hand up to HP, I work to leave them there. My AH and I have a daughter who just turned 3. She lives with her mom during the week and we have her almost every weekend, if not for a full weekend then at leas...	Jackie11	18	1518	Jan 19, 2012 by Jackie11
	Update! (Preview) Again, thank you all for your incredible ESH (and for your research). It is serving me well, and helping me to feel stronger. I met with a divorce lawyer yesterday - to ask questions. She was VERY concerned about my safety. I was a bit embarrassed when asked "is there any domestic violence?&q...	KLotus	6	413	Jan 19, 2012 by rara avis
	Intern and judgments .. (Preview) Good morning fellow shippers ? I'm starting an Intern this morning and am nervous. Of course my confidence isn't all that because I put it off for a year and am just now returning. It wasn't waisted time, however, I am feeling the effects of my procrastination in that I've forgotten many things through...	MeTwo2	3	438	Jan 19, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Husband Hiding Alcohol (Preview) Hi, I am new to the group and never thought that I would need to reach out for something like t his. I have been with my husband for 13 years and married 10. We have two boys and have had a happy life together. About two years ago, my husband seemed to have lost a lot of weight so I urged him to get in for a physi...	CelinaR	16	7657	Jan 19, 2012 by Pushka
	I do not want to enable.... (Preview) My DH has been clean for 13 months. He has come a long way in a lot of areas. Thanks to Al-anon, I have come a long way in a lot of areas too. However, money is an issue that keeps being a big problem. He works and I stay home. With 4 children, me working and putting kids in daycare is financially out of the q...	LostToday	8	1899	Jan 19, 2012 by Pushka
	Alcoholic husband in recovery (Preview) Hello..I am new to this forum and am hopeing I will be able to get some answers from people who have been through this... My husband and I have been married 18 yrs. He has been an alcoholic since I met him, i just didnt realize it in time. I finally left 2 years ago with our son. He started an out patient reh...	wantinganswers	17	828	Jan 19, 2012 by wantinganswers
	H is recovering…Y can't I? Help…. (Preview) After 9+years of marriage to a "functional" alcoholic he seems to be a new man. I won't go into the long ugly history now but his recovery started when I had an "exit affair" 6 months ago. My affair devastated me and it has been difficult to come to grips with. On the other hand he say...	upintheair	14	577	Jan 19, 2012 by Seahorse
	Changing the things I can (Preview)	Pushka	5	665	Jan 19, 2012 by hotrod
	I've Got This! (Preview) I've Got This! So my world came crashing down on me.the ground pulled from under my feetI was lost and so heart brokencrying so much, there was no copinThen out of no wherea voice hard to missthundering from the HeavensHe saidChild I've Got this!I've got it under controlI've got your heart here.you...	John	4	375	Jan 19, 2012 by Debilyn
	90-90 (Preview) My sponsor and I have agreed that I will not be finishing my Al-Anon 90-90. I can see why it's extremely beneficial for AA members in their early days of sobriety -- keeping them busy with the program gives them less time to revert to old behaviors -- but for me, being super-busy brought back old behavior...	atheos	5	852	Jan 19, 2012 by hotrod
	feel my past is hauting me (Preview) HI From my bio you will read that I have a few violent past partners. One of those partners still lives in the relatively small city that I live in. He is a local businessman in the same area of building trade that my husband works in. I have often expressed my warnings that if they were ever to run into eac...	Lindaoakford	5	598	Jan 19, 2012 by Lindaoakford
	Growth / Stagnant Growth (Preview) I've shared on this before that I had the awareness that the addicts stops growing from the time they started using. What I later had the awareness on was how I quit growing also the second I began obssessing and focusing on the addict/alcoholic (s) instead of me. For me, this was honestly around 5. Wit...	MeTwo2	7	481	Jan 18, 2012 by glad lee
	husband (Preview) My husband is a physically abusive alcoholic. He had to go to the emergency room for a suicide attempt and then to a mental health facility. During this time I ran and got a restraining order. The court dropped the restraining order b/c he was in a mental health facility. Since it has been dropped, h...	ttpurtee	5	586	Jan 18, 2012 by Jerry F
	Support (Preview) I've been looking for a support group for those in relationships with prescription drug addicts. My bf is now in recovery for 8 months after a 3 month stay in rehab. Looking for infor and support with the rollercoaster emotions that go along with it. He was great for 3 months, went back to work and now...	double rainbow	6	404	Jan 17, 2012 by double rainbow
	ugh (Preview) Well, I tripped from my bad leg on the deck over the river. Fell flat hard on my front. Broke my rib again and am sore everywhere. Someone messed up my fence and stole all my gas. Mind you I am way up in the mountains.... Had horrible dreams about my brother. I need ACOBB's. Adult children who had a bad brothe...	Debilyn	14	429	Jan 17, 2012 by Debilyn
	Disturbing phone call! (Preview) So the other day I expressed a very long post saying: The start of step 1! Finally put an end to living his addiciton! Refuse to live this way! Well I started the process of feeling good and not sad, not mad either. I was a little pissed but I actually have been blanking him out of my head. Well I dont know why...	Julie3310	4	609	Jan 17, 2012 by Julie3310
	"Why is Daddy being so mean?" (Preview) My 5 year old asked me this just now, and it is breaking my heart. My AH is home, but severly stressed about losing a lot of his work (due to cutbacks), and having ugly feelings that, for today, he is not masking with drinking. He is, however, in a bad mood and snappy. With the children, he has a history of...	danni	7	422	Jan 17, 2012 by danni
	I wish I could believe this gets better (Preview) I feel like I have to do things for people or they won't like me, because I am the weird, shy, awkward fat girl who likes to stay at home and read instead of party, that I'm no fun to be around, and people only put up with me because I do nice things for them and they feel guilty like they have to be nice. I do thing...	atheos	13	595	Jan 17, 2012 by atheos
	keeping secrets of the one who's sick (Preview) My husband just admitted to me that he had been using Heroin all day yesterday (for the first time). This admission comes after I continued to ask him about his tracked and bruised arms. He continues longtime suffering from alcoholism and prescription opiate Dependancy. He has been on a 14 month long...	smzele	15	1070	Jan 17, 2012 by Michelle814
	holding to my boundries (Preview) I am being pressured by my AS to give him money so he can take this girl on a "date" . #1 I don't believe him that it is for a date. #2. I truely have no money to give him. I told him "no" and he won't let it go. He was in his room texting me and just keeps it going . He is so desprete that he ask...	debbiems	5	441	Jan 17, 2012 by pinkchip
	The Storm is Passing (Preview) Well.. I took a day off work Friday for a spiritual day. Every sign I fell upon was my HP telling me that it is okay to live a little. As in I heard this tale of a man who asks a monk... "If I meditate for 6 hours a day how soon will I reach spiritual enlightenment?" The monk responds "ten yea...	Michelle814	6	456	Jan 17, 2012 by Jackie11
	Learning How to Live (by Beth Hart) (Preview) [vide	John	5	879	Jan 17, 2012 by GailMichelle
	Senseless loss. Prayers please! (Preview) Last night my friend's ah shot and killed her while her two babies slept! This is so unreal, such a tragedy. I know she was trying to separate herself from him but was torn because of the kids, and had said he was "rarely" violent. There were so many red flags, and I tried to be there for her when s...	sarebaer	9	420	Jan 17, 2012 by Grace7
	how to word it. (Preview) I have told my Abf several times now that if he drinks do not come home just stay with who ever you are drinking with. But every night he drinks and then drives home or calls me to come get him. Well I am done with it. I am serious I do not want him in my house if he has been drinking. Its eaither drink or live here...	HoofnIt	10	482	Jan 16, 2012 by Yllek
	Don't know how to explain to my kids (Preview) My mother is an alcoholic. She has had serveral relapses since first getting sober when I was 15. I am now 35, I am married, have three great kids. My mom lived with us for about 7 years and in Jan 2011 moved into her own apartment, my two youngest, ages 8 and 9, spend most weekends with her. Until last n...	NumbandAngry	4	300	Jan 16, 2012 by Breakingfree
	In Crisis (Preview) This weekend was my husband's weekend. Last night we went to a concert (tickets were my Xmas gift to him), and today he went to a fan convention for his favorite sports team (tickets were the kids' Xmas gift to him). We had a great time at the concert, and he had a wonderful time at the convention today. ...	stephaniej	15	640	Jan 16, 2012 by stephaniej
	Can I ask my alcoholic unemployed roommate to leave within 3 weeks? (Preview) My alcoholic roommate "Ron" is a good friend and has been living with us for 6 months. Ron and I both rent rooms from my best (and lifelong) friend "James" who owns the house, and there is no written lease for either of us. We are all 30 yr old bachelors. Previously, James and I lived...	SnowRavenX	5	1039	Jan 16, 2012 by Debilyn
	hugs to you all, haven't dropped off the face of the earth! (Preview) Hey everybody, Just wanted to say that I've been doing a lot of writing lately [ big presentation ] hence I have not felt like writing much besides that. So I've been lurking, been reading a lot of posts, nodding or shaking my head where appropriate, and have wanted to send support to every single one...	rara avis	4	339	Jan 16, 2012 by rara avis
	update from the weekend (Preview) For those of you who may remember.... I was a little concerned and really employed the One Day At A Time thing this weekend. I thought my husband would contact friends of his who are in town due to a personal family medical emergency. They are major pot smokers. I decided that no matter what, I have thing...	Lindaoakford	3	374	Jan 16, 2012 by Debilyn
	No internet can respond to posts cant start any it's on my en (Preview)	Pushka	5	452	Jan 16, 2012 by Jackie11
	How do I detatch and not take us both down? (Preview) My siginificant other and I joined forces in business almost 4 years ago. She's the licensed professional, and I'm the marketing guy. Despite her 4th stage alcoholism, we've been able to grow the business successfully, and we're set to have the best year ever. I finally became wise enough to try alan...	sparky60	5	594	Jan 16, 2012 by abbyal
	A comforting thought I keep coming back to... (Preview) Regardless of whether I turn right or turn left, I will still end up where I need to be. It's OK to enjoy the journey and stop worrying about the destination. Looking back at my life, everything was leading to me being right where I am now. I took a lot of different turns, but I still ended up here. And here...	Very Very Tired	5	481	Jan 15, 2012 by maryjane
	Update (Preview) First of all, thanks everyone for all your support. It was immensely helpful. My AH came home last night. He called in the afternoon, and I told him I was uncomfortable not knowing where he was and what his plan was. He said he was coming home. So he did, gave me a hug, said he missed us, and i felt...su...	danni	7	331	Jan 15, 2012 by danni
	Life Without the Internet (Preview) Hi All, I jus0t got re-connected with my Internet provider. It's been around 3 weeks without service. First, my laptop had to be sent to Dell for repair. Coffee, cream and sugar were accidently spilt on it. That took about 2 and a half weeks to get it back and $360 (ouch!) Then, my re-connection was de...	GailMichelle	2	254	Jan 15, 2012 by Pushka
	How do you "let go" when a child is involved?? (Preview) Hello everyone...I'm new to the forum & am so happy to have found it! It's so frustrating when people don't unstand what you're going through. I tried an Al-Anon meeting once, about 4 yrs ago. But, I didn't think it was for me. I had a hard time w/ it because it made me feel like I was the alcoholic....	Peace33	7	1552	Jan 15, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Help! Confused about how to be around her... (Preview) I'm going to my sister's to do her hair soon & I don't know what expression to have on my face, or how to behave anymore! We've been through this rollercoaster so many times, I'm confused between trying to do the right thing & of knowing how to help her & myself. I'm tired of having to walk on...	Peace33	6	414	Jan 14, 2012 by Debilyn
	My fiance drinks too much (Preview) Hi all. This is my first post and I am new to Alanon (5 weeks). I don't have a sponsor as yet to ask this question. Although I was uncomfortable with it, I left my fiancé to drink with my work friends at a barbecue last night whilst I went to work. She is aware that situation makes me uncomfortable and upon lea...	AusRat	8	558	Jan 14, 2012 by Yllek
	Whose BOAT is it anyway? (Preview) Readers Digest version: Been in Alanon since 2003, changed my life in so many positive ways (I should write a book), have an active healthy life. Married a terrific guy Dec 2010, have a dream honeymoon, happy life on our busy little ranch, perfect right! Oct 2011, I am at a stop in my little corolla waiti...	Yllek	12	693	Jan 14, 2012 by Yllek
	no nonsense; just me! (Preview) I am open to the posibilities today. I hope for only the best & sometimes expect the worst. The program has taught me to face fears & accept the things I cannot change. I have noticed that lately there are a lot of things I cannot change. The are no absolutes in this that I can see. The only thing con...	Hoot Nanny	0	301	Jan 14, 2012 by Hoot Nanny
	gratitude list in pictorial form (Preview) ok, I got hold of a few facebook photos to put onhere. I have chosen things that make me smile today...... My big cat's name is Colin and he is now 13 years old. the big black dog is my husbands dog and she is not allowed near the little ones or she will eat them.... the flowers are a sample of the type of thing...	Lindaoakford	13	1776	Jan 14, 2012 by nortski
	Fellng kind of bitter and angry today! (Preview) Although I have accepted my AH is SICK. He is mentally sick and he is an alcoholic. My neighbor just had a baby. He wants to act all lovey dovey with me and start talking about how nice it would be to have a baby at home. Ababy of our own. I just feel so angry with him I want to cry. Angry that we couldn't have one m...	odalis	5	501	Jan 14, 2012 by Pushka
	AH took off for a few days (Preview) After expressing that he felt overwhelmed and lost, my occasionally drinking AH said he wanted to take a break for a few days. I said (I was prepared this time) , "if that's what you feel you need to do". I used to plead and talk him into staying. So within half an hour he left. He woudn't tell me w...	danni	9	616	Jan 14, 2012 by Debilyn
	hope it gets better... (Preview) As I am sitting here I don't have a plan what I want to say. I noticed today that my family ties are really severed. I guess if I want to I can piece them back together. I am only responsible for what I can do these days. I have a cousin who I would like to reconnect w/ some day. I have family who seems distant at so...	Hoot Nanny	1	289	Jan 14, 2012 by Debilyn
	Authority Figures (Preview) Starting my intern next week and have one class to take on the side to accompany it. I'm having a hard time going back to finish college; I took a year off that was Much needed. Now, however, I am looking at things and recognising I have to work for someone. I am still dealing with the area of authority figur...	MeTwo2	4	482	Jan 14, 2012 by Debilyn
	More Update (Preview) Thank you to all who've responded. You are amazing. Truly. Below are answers to some questions, and an update about an incident last night To answer some questions: My AH went into rehab last May-June. He got out, did some AA for about 8 weeks (at best), and ditched. Then he went to couseling, ditc...	KLotus	5	495	Jan 14, 2012 by likemyheart
	The start of step 1! Finally put an end to living his addiciton! Refuse to live this way! (Preview) The other day I wrote a post on how do i end things. Should I visit him or not. I already mentally prepared myself that this relationship is over. After a year of cheating, lying and instance of physical abuse and taking a hard hit financially with this person and sticking with him through the 1t time in ja...	Julie3310	6	505	Jan 13, 2012 by Iris lover of dogs
	How to like ourselves more.... (Preview) Recovery is civil war, but it is a war that can be won. --Sister Imelda How often do we hear people say, "Sure, I know it's the right thing to do - but it's easier said than done!'' But "it," whatever "it" is for each of us, is actually easier done than not done. As hard as it is t...	glad lee	5	457	Jan 13, 2012 by Iris lover of dogs
	Consumed with hate for my AH (Preview) I have really regressed in my recovery. I hate my soon-to-be ex-AH so much, and I am so full of resentments. I've been going to extra meetings, but it hasn't really helped yet. I posted before that I am divorcing my AH. He's been clean for about 15 months, but not really working a program of recovery. And,...	stopandchat	21	681	Jan 13, 2012 by likemyheart
	Will I ever find the trust? (Preview) After 2 years of living apart, ultimately ending in divorce, my ex-husband still begs me to give him another chance. We struggled through 8 years of dealing with his drinking before his violent rampages sent bricks and benches through my windows while I rushed to hide with our 3 yr old. After a DUI he w...	GettingStronger	10	515	Jan 13, 2012 by GettingStronger
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.