|
|
Neighbor
(Preview)
I have a neighbor that lives next door to me our driveways are side by side she moved in several mths ago she is a recovering a she is in her late 30s and a beautiful young lady lately she im pretty sure is relapse ing big time she stopped her meetings and hanging with the same ppl her bf is a policeman that I've...
|
lookingup
|
4
|
250
|
|
|
|
progress
(Preview)
there's been a lot of love going around for mip lately and I want to add mine too. I've attended online meetings and one face to face. I have been gratefully bombarded with literature suggestions and read as much as I can. Yesterday I bought myself three bunches of flowers,just because I could and becau...
|
aquamom23
|
4
|
332
|
|
|
|
New beginnings it works if you work it.... hugs to all
(Preview)
I left my husband active alcoholic 2 years ago....dated him the last 6 months...and the only one who changed... was me... Thank you ALANON. Alanon was my life line, good friends and with hard work,attending meetings and participatingin this website I got strong and made good decisions for m...
|
whispers
|
12
|
546
|
|
|
|
Just dropped by to say HELLOOOO alanons
(Preview)
Hey Everyone!!!! Its been a busy 4 month or so.....things began to really change for me in July, early in the month... My daughter #2 called me and said "I miss my mommy" and I told her that I missed her too, but right is right..wrong is wrong and boundaries are sincere.....so we met in sorta b...
|
neshema2
|
15
|
536
|
|
|
|
Missed you all!
(Preview)
I sure have missed you all. I've been on a mini vacation with AH. We went camping and did some fishing. The dang fish weren't biting, though. But the river was absolutely beautiful and the weather was gorgeous. I was remembering a few months ago (almost 6 months). Had God not led me to Al-Anon, I'm not su...
|
cloudyskies
|
6
|
221
|
|
|
|
Never Ending Nightmare
(Preview)
I am sitting here with a gun and bullets on my dining room table that my son and I found in my recently relapsed, soon to be ex AH's house. He was being held in jail over the weekend for making threats of violence and death to me over the phone while in a drunken rage about a week ago. Since I filed for divorce...
|
wornoutmrsfixit
|
21
|
717
|
|
|
|
Remember I said...
(Preview)
Remember a few days ago I said, there was a guy who is advertising a room around the corner from me...he has "big ramshackle house with lots of character", a dog that is starving for another dog's company...and I said i just had a "feeling" about it? LOL well, we emailed back and f...
|
missmeliss
|
9
|
546
|
|
|
|
Loss due to addiction
(Preview)
Not really sure what I expect to gain from this... maybe just for someone to tell me I am not Crazy. My only sibling passed on Nov. 27 2013 at the age of 36 due to kidney and liver failure brought on by septic shock. Try as I might to help him, I knew he was the only one that could do what needed to be done. He went i...
|
Chellelynn
|
3
|
717
|
|
|
|
In need of some of your tales of experiences, strength and hope.
(Preview)
Hi Everyone, I feel pretty low today. I woke up at 5am and couldn't sleep again. I have had really chronic tension in my body for over 4 years which has completely taken over my life and I seem to clench everything in my sleep (teeth, jaw, legs, stomach), and then the whole of the following day I am in such p...
|
singingnick377
|
10
|
567
|
|
|
|
Quitting my job
(Preview)
There... I've said it. I can hardly believe that in another month it will be two years since she passed away. I wanted to call my mom yesterday because it seems no one else could really understand what I'm going through at work. No one else will answer the phone with such delighted surprise because...
|
tiredtonite
|
15
|
546
|
|
|
|
Grandiosity and Mr Nice Guy
(Preview)
So, my AH has been on a Mr Perfect routine right now. Being really nice, doing things that go above and beyond, helping me with stuff he's never helped with before, etc. It's like he doesn't seem to understand that I'm done and that we're splitting up soon. He seems to be grasping at things which he thi...
|
andromeda
|
12
|
677
|
|
|
|
Fiancé is getting out of rehab for first time. What can I expect?
(Preview)
He checked himself into rehab for a few weeks and is coming home soon to myself and our 2 1/2 year old. What can I expect? I know we'll both be going to meetings, which is great. But I'm so nervous I'll be walking on eggshells every day. I'm scared to get him stressed out in any way. Will he feel good after re...
|
Gleleni
|
5
|
437
|
|
|
|
Thank You! Yesterday was awesome
(Preview)
I've been feeling pretty down, found out I've been betrayed once again in a 4 year relationship once again ended it. I dont hurt as much this time. Realizing we both have 2 different sets of morals. I've been looking for a sponsor an getting finding rejection, one of the 3 groups I attend the leader was up...
|
Newpaths
|
8
|
481
|
|
|
|
Acts just like an AH
(Preview)
My sister in law thought this forum may help me. My husband does not use alcohol. However, he behaves exactly like an adult child of an alcoholic. I have not participated in an Alanon program but have read the 12 step book. He has recently mailed me divorce papers. I have searched online divorce f...
|
JustLea
|
5
|
327
|
|
|
|
5 more days ..
(Preview)
LOL .. this feels like dejuv at this point .. did I not say this before? Can't post to much right now just want to say we will have a court date on Wednesday and I WILL be divorced unless of course there is an act of God at which point I give up .. I will just stay married and leave everything as is .. lol. I'm so d...
|
SerenityRUS
|
4
|
402
|
|
|
|
Prayers please ..
(Preview)
I have really been struggling obviously over the past week or so and just need extra prayers of support during this extremely difficult time. There have been a lot of good things to come out of it .. still it's very difficult to not get stuck in my fear and let my anxiety fly. I have a meeting with my atty o...
|
SerenityRUS
|
17
|
422
|
|
|
|
Feeling so sorry for STBXA
(Preview)
He has been quiet and keeping himself to himself lately, his moving out is all organised and he is agreeable with the separation. But I look at him and he looks so depressed and sad. It must be hard leaving the family home and not being able to see our daughter often. I am not backtracking, I know I gave him l...
|
Luiza
|
13
|
525
|
|
|
|
Bed Bugs
(Preview)
This is definitely a gross topic My AH called this morning pretty upset and said that the 1/2 way house and the 3/4 way house which sit next door to each other are infested with bed bugs and they were told not to tell anyone! He was upset because a few months ago he told me of the problem at the same houses and I...
|
Flower49
|
5
|
419
|
|
|
|
Relapse and slips
(Preview)
These 2words scare the dinkins out of me for some reason I know I goes that I'm not immune to them from far.ive been studying on step one most f morning I didn't realize there was is so much to just that one step.very interesting indeed I know now that my life gets out of control with people which has made my l...
|
lookingup
|
5
|
538
|
|
|
|
Total disbelief!
(Preview)
So it's been almost 3 months since my ex AH dropped me by text, no apology, nothing. Although for my part I know it's made things far easier and I'm grateful that he hasn't tried contacting me. When we would previously split he would relentlessly contact me, one minute pouring his heart out, the next b...
|
Flossy
|
2
|
344
|
|
|
|
Had a great meeting like always here in mip
(Preview)
I'm learning a lot about sick ppl for sure I'm still sticking with step one caused I beleive that's where I'm stuck at for now or however long it takes me to fully understand it and grasp its meaning.im decided to stay single and not let myself get into another relationship for at least however long it tak...
|
lookingup
|
6
|
312
|
|
|
|
just for today....
(Preview)
... I will try to set my mind to being happy, like abraham lincoln. Ive been a miserable boot lately. Really busy, procrastinating like a pro but tired. so this is my morning attempt at setting up a happy mindset. Im grateful for... Crisp autumn weather. Central heating My grown kids being healthy, w...
|
el-cee
|
10
|
515
|
|
|
|
The things they say!
(Preview)
Temple, I am starting a new post in light of what you picked up on my Just thinking thread, you were indeed the only one that picked up on my husband saying he doesn't use our washing machine, in my mind that felt like he was saying it's not my problem! So I am on holiday from work this week hence all my postin...
|
Katy
|
8
|
446
|
|
|
|
Xbf trying to push
(Preview)
Xbf has tried everything from a-z and back agin texting over and over i gave him everything he had here holding nothing of his and with all the chaos I plum forgot to get my house key to my bottem locks on my house only key I had he started off with he was dieing wanted me to take him to er that didn't work then he...
|
lookingup
|
6
|
463
|
|
|
|
Mini freak out with a great learning lesson with it
(Preview)
I have to admit now after a few years in program and making a lot of the changes, things have gotten a lot better, especially in my thinking. I used to just live in crisis mode and walk around freaking out. Now when it happens it throws me for a loop, even when it's not a full blown deal. So my boyfriend of 6 mo...
|
Breakingfree
|
7
|
494
|
|
|
|
"What's A going to do? Where's A going to live?"
(Preview)
I'm tired of these questions. I don't know what he's going to do. I don't want to think about it. I don't know if he's going to get a job. I don't know if he's going to "straighten himself out now". I don't know if his brother is going to help him move. I don't know if he's going to get his old car fixe...
|
missmeliss
|
19
|
668
|
|
|
|
Just finished up nightly mip meeting
(Preview)
Flower from mip gave me a ph.no and web address for a place to call to get help for myself and to help me with the addict in my life and I lost it does anybody have this ph no.ty lu
|
lookingup
|
1
|
179
|
|
|
|
Haven't been 2 a meeting
(Preview)
I haven't been to a meeting since Febuary 2014 lots has happen and the two people that have tried to talk with me from my home group I really don't want to talk to. I can say this I'm not sure if I will go to meetings again. I became frustrated with the meetings that are around. I do go to an open AA speakers meet...
|
KathieG
|
1
|
199
|
|
|
|
Acceptance
(Preview)
I am feeling better these days in relation to my situation. I have to every day look at this realistically and be open minded. I of course was not happy that my AH now has up to 180 days he has to stay in a 3/4 way house, yet I am feeling more peace as we started our marriage counseling this week, I am allowed to d...
|
Flower49
|
20
|
712
|
|
|
|
Sponser
(Preview)
How did you find your sponsor, what did you look for, helpful tips
|
Newpaths
|
7
|
459
|
|
|
|
Just thinking!
(Preview)
When your on the same page as someone they just so get you, sometimes just a look is enough for you to know they they understand, but when your not on the same page I know I am always trying to fight my corner explain myself reason with and I am talking about in relationship to my husband, I am soooooooooo no...
|
Katy
|
16
|
511
|
|
|
|
TRADITION 12
(Preview)
Tradition 12: Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of all our traditions, ever reminding us to place principles above personalities. Pages 63 and 64 in our alanon book, AL-ANON FAMILY GROUPS, offers more than one simple description of the power of this tradition. It offers more than we might t...
|
wp
|
2
|
214
|
|
|
|
So it's been over a week with no "reacting" from me....
(Preview)
I am working on the first step, it has been like a huge weight has been lifted as I stop trying to control everything and everyone! admitting I am powerless against this horrible disease. I finally get that I can't fix this...for a control freak like myself, I cannot believe how empowering this feels! ...
|
Fairlee
|
3
|
407
|
|
|
|
Ugh! I chickened out! (Al Anon meeting)
(Preview)
BUT I did actually drive by this time...I'm getting closer! I just don't understand why I get paralyzed by fear when I get close to actually going!! It was crazy tbough...I drove by, there were TONS of people getting out of cars and heading to a building that had "AA" in the window. my garmin s...
|
Fairlee
|
5
|
528
|
|
|
|
For Debylin!!
(Preview)
Now Luiza suggested that her daughter might draw a picture of your animals and you Deb, so I am stealing her idea really but my daughter always asks me "what should I draw, mum?" and last night she texted me from my mum's house where she was staying "what can i draw" and I sent her a ph...
|
missmeliss
|
16
|
624
|
|
|
|
Grieving
(Preview)
I didn't want to high jack the other thread about emotions so I started my own. i am on emotional overload. I cried all day yesterday. That is real hard for me to do. I am on antidepressant and haven't been able to cry for some time. I decreased my dosage. This is allowing me to feel more. I think it is g...
|
Hullibee
|
38
|
1006
|
|
|
|
Need prayers please
(Preview)
I joined Alanon in June, due to an up an down relationship, we're both seniors, both widowed, both raised in a alcoholic family, (we bith have the alcoholic patterns a) although neither of us drink but occasioally not much at that. God knows the situation, once again I'm torn on what to do. Ive given th...
|
Newpaths
|
14
|
533
|
|
|
|
My heart is broken
(Preview)
The reality that my relationship with A is ending because he went too far and got violent is setting in. There's no chance of any healthy communication around this because he won't or isn't capable or just doesn't want to take any responsibility for what he did. So I'm feeling quite low this morning at t...
|
rainbow
|
15
|
533
|
|
|
|
God doesn't give us
(Preview)
any more than we can handle. How long has it been since we have heard that message and how much longer that we wanted to completely believe and trust it. I have been quiet and listening with my eyes and ears. I have reviewed again and again the message before me and have come to understand that my Hig...
|
Jerry F
|
19
|
387
|
|
|
|
New Member and regressing to my former life?
(Preview)
Hello Everyone. I'm new here and I'm in hopes to find comfort and strength in this community. To share a bit of my story would take a lifetime I think, but in somewhat of a nutshell... I was with my ex (also my children's father) for 10 years. I met him in a bar when I was 21 years old. A few years down the road,...
|
WanderingSoul2
|
10
|
461
|
|
|
|
TRUST !!!
(Preview)
This message was powerful to me: we trust other drivers while we are on the road these drivers maybe high or drunk. We trust the ups person that our package will get where we send it and it will arrive on time as they told us it would. We trust our bank that our money will be secured and the bankers will make no...
|
Gaby
|
9
|
428
|
|
|
|
I took the ice cold pool challenge!
(Preview)
Hi everyone. I wanted to share a story about using Al anon tools. Yesterday I was having an argument with AH on the phone. Nothing new really. I was getting really upset and depressed. I had decided I wouldn't go to my divorce support group. my youngest daughter has been asking me to go swimming all summ...
|
Newlife girl
|
4
|
298
|
|
|
|
a vent.
(Preview)
last weeks thought for peace in my life was,very few people could stay sane in your home. That really clicked for me. It gave me validation that the situation is crazy.my ah is most definitely an alcoholic. When we met,he was not one 24 hour period without alcohol in his system. Including our wedding da...
|
aquamom23
|
2
|
310
|
|
|
|
Need to update my profile
(Preview)
Hello I need to update my profile information my main cp is not working and I don't have the link to set it up can anyone send me the link to the sign up page thank you
|
Wisdom67
|
1
|
180
|
|
|
|
Flooded with emotions...
(Preview)
Just needing to be heard I guess. So tired of crying about my AH...who I am divorcing. The pain just comes in waves--I am fine some days, others I am a basket-case clinging to the shattered dream as it slips away. I see us both struggling and feeling confused, angry, sad...all these emotions at once. So o...
|
sookie
|
9
|
527
|
|
|
|
Remembering STBX's P-A behaviours...
(Preview)
I have been reading on passive aggressive behaviour and oppositional defiance behaviour, since my daughter is watching (and learning) those from her dad. The memories of things he always did is flooding in, and I am stunned how I put up with so much crap for such a long time... Like when I got for free fr...
|
Luiza
|
4
|
397
|
|
|
|
Punished for not giving urine! :-(
(Preview)
Hi Family, Just need to vent. My friend of over 15 years just landed her "dream" job that she's been wanting since I've known her. It is working in the school system. She asked me for urine for her drug test and I said no. I offered my friend practical options from my heart that she could req...
|
bud
|
28
|
781
|
|
|
|
I just feel like posting...
(Preview)
Sometimes I just feel like posting for no particular reason. I have only so many opportunities to post during the week. I just want to send some of our sunshine your way. I have a little extra up here. It is one of the most beautiful days because we have been having unusual high temps. The day is going well....
|
Hoot Nanny
|
3
|
276
|
|
|
|
threats don't work
(Preview)
Hi. About nine months ago, when I was a newbie in alanon, I gave my spouse a threat-to either get involved with AA or OA or I was moving out of our bedroom. Well of course she does not have a drinking problem, that is in my head, but she cannot deny she has an eating problem as she is at a life-threatening wei...
|
Lyne
|
10
|
671
|
|
|
|
A little hurt that I hope you can be gentle with..
(Preview)
This is not the first time that we have had a housing crisis brought on by A and his lack of finances/dislike of working/ chaos. In fact it is the 6th one I have been through with him. The first one, he was not living with me but was kicked out of his place and I helped him finance and move to a new place nearby. (...
|
missmeliss
|
19
|
937
|
|
|
|
Realising Husband is an Alcoholic
(Preview)
I have been married to my husband for 11 years and together for 15. Over the last two weeks I have realised that he is an alcoholic and that this combined with his masked depression has had a huge impact on us. I also realise I have been co-dependent and enabling this by not clearly setting the boundarie...
|
nicola444
|
3
|
370
|
|
|
|
AH is quite the artist...and so is daughter
(Preview)
Last night I posted about AH finishing a school project too late on a school night. He ended up working on it after I brought daughter home. He left it at the house for us to pick up this morning before school. I was nervous about it possibly not being done. Well, he finished it and it brought tears to my eyes...
|
Newlife girl
|
14
|
1158
|
|
|
|
So sorry I didn't use my al anon tools...
(Preview)
I came home and found AH drunk on his day off from work. Our 13 year old was also home from school only an hour before. Son was upstairs in his room. I just lost it when I saw AH. My anger was seething. We had a huge argument in the garage and I told him to leave. We are legally separated but he has been living with...
|
Jessmine
|
11
|
568
|
|
|
|
No drunk enough or high enough to not know what you have done - a story of hope
(
1 2
)
(Preview)
I watched an interview today with a celebrity who has been in recovery for many years. One of the things she said that really got my attention was that she learned that she couldn't get drunk enough or high enough not to know what she had really done and the shame of it. Three marriages that all ended for...
|
grateful2be
|
46
|
1013
|
|
|
|
Is it possible to work thru the anger and frustration and stay with the alcoholic?
(Preview)
I too am so confused. My husband is a fantastic guy - when he doesn't drink. He has had several times where he just doesn't drink which is fantastic and then it starts again. I really care about him but the drinking makes me soooo angry! It feels that by the time I come home from work I might as well have s...
|
Toodles
|
14
|
544
|
|
|
|
Working Acceptance
(Preview)
It feels like its not often that I can share something positive- and- I thought this may be helpful for when we're certain we're at the end of our rope, tied a knot and have been forever holding on. For those that dont know, Ive been estranged by my family of origin with the exception that I am, under limit...
|
bud
|
6
|
438
|
|
|
|
My friend works alot
(Preview)
I've texted my male friend off and on all day. It he only texted me one time early this morning answer my ? Of weather he could come by my place to have a cup of coffee he texted he was on his way to another town 40 mins away on an emergency call that he was on the road already so that being said I left it alone. It af...
|
lookingup
|
18
|
673
|
|
|
|
Said what I meant but didn't say it mean
(Preview)
I am prefacing this post with some background. It's my first time here and I'm grateful this is here. I love Al-Anon and all the people in it. I've been in Al-Anon for over 2 years and it has been my saving grace and my key to peace. I'm learning to depend on my HP more. I'm working my program more. The most, I'...
|
alwaysLP13
|
6
|
538
|
|
|
|
Procrastination and justification
(Preview)
This is just a rant. Again. I am absolutely sick of AH and his procrastination. He is helping daughter with a school project. I asked him to help her with it 2 weeks ago. So, he is working on it at the last minute of course. Doesn't surprise me. He tells me "if worse comes to worse, she can turn it in the n...
|
Newlife girl
|
31
|
1076
|
|
|
|
Suddenly spoiled for choice....
(Preview)
Interesting how when I finally gave in and decided to make peace with the idea of going to my parents, other offers started to roll in. I declined the 2 potential job offers because I was going to be living hours away in a city where jobs would be relatively easy to find. I spoke to daughter's school about t...
|
missmeliss
|
8
|
404
|
|