Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

HEARTBROKEN IN NJ · HEARTBROKEN IN NJ

As some may recall, I was tossing thoughts about in my head about contacting my ex ABF to see how he was doing in rehab. While ultimately I decided not to call him directly, I did email his brother (who I was always close with) to get an update. Apparently my ex is doing 'ok' although according to his brot...

shawn306 · shawn306

and I have no idea how I am going to handle it right now. Things have not been good between us recently because he basically stops drinking when we come down and then starts right back up as soon as we leave. This has been the trend now for over a year. He "recognizes" that he has a problem but will...

mum2leahnjosh · mum2leahnjosh

I knew it would be too good to be true. Last sunday I asked him to lend me some money so I could pay for my college fee's. He said yeah but then went on a bender and spent all his wages (which I didnt know about till I was ready to pay the fee's). Anyway that night he told me he let me down and he got upset and he said h...

kissers · kissers

Hi everyone, I don't know if anyone has the opportunity to watch Oprah today, but Gavin de Becker (I think that is his name) will be on the show to talk about fear warning us to protect ourselves. FEAR is not always false evidence appearing real. Sometimes it is a warning. He will be discussing how to know...

Tenderheartsks · Tenderheartsks

Two of my college classes started yesterday. My youngest had done some online classes through an adult education center, and they used the Blackboard system. I had also taken a few online courses through University of Phoenix. Yesterday once I got logged on, I was overwhelmed! I am a very computer li...

Mobirdie · Mobirdie

At a meeting last week a newcomer asked how do I explain the disease of alcoholism to a 12 year old boy. This boy has been raised by his grandparents and has a lot of anger and resentment built up against his mother. Any ideas on how to do this so that the young man will understand?

suzim · suzim

with your addict?

Codependent · Codependent

This morning I keep thinking about how my A thinks I am neurotic. He always comments on how "bad" I feel about everything and how I worry all the time, etc. The times we have used together- not that distant past- I have always started feeling guilty soon after (the next morning) and often cri...

round3 · round3

Okay Family, my A will be back in this country and at my house in seven days. I'm excited, and scared, and happy, and NERVOUS. It's been 11 years since I've seen him, and there's been lots of water under the bridge since then. In these 11 years, I've learned about strength and forgiveness. I've learn...

dnlmangels · dnlmangels

Hello everyone! I am so happy to find this forum. I have been in and out of Al-anon for 15 years. Course by in and out that means I am pretty sick. As soon as the Alcoholic gets his life together, I am out the door..... stupid! stupid! I was introduced to Al-anon when my dad sobered up years ago. I was raised...

Codependent · Codependent

Well, I have now gone 24 hours without calling the A since he didn't come to watch movies last night or even call to say he wasn't coming. I know he had child support court this morning and from his mother I know he went. However, I have not called him or his friends,etc, to find out what happened. It is sca...

debilyn · debilyn

Finally after a year of wondering about the A, and back to crying over love songs.....missing my husband, I listened to my heart and went to see him. I had no expectations. All I knew was I could not call him, and I am sure he is not opening my letters. Needed to get a dose to get me to see again,that my AH who u...

Codependent · Codependent

I do understand that everyone gets tired of the same story- especially my family. I also hope that I am not taking advantage of this board by venting every situation that comes up. But, it's like as soon as they are happening I think about telling you guys to get your feedback. However, I know you all g...

suzip · suzip

I have been spending weekends at the beach with friends trying to escape from the rollercoaster life I live with my AH. How more relaxed can you get then looking out at the ocean, listening to the waves, how can you not smile? When I ran my 4 miles in the morning yesterday, I couldn't get rid of my stinkin th...

Codependent · Codependent

I took the bait today. He called and "pretended" to be jealous that I didn't call him all weekend etc,.. Told his mom he thought I was seeing someone else though he told me he didn't care who I was sleeping with in a nasty tone. I told him I thought we had better conversations in jail. He said...

maresie · maresie

I am one year out from letting the A go. Last September I had finally had it and found a place (albeit barely on survival) and cut my losses with the A. Well I took huge huge losses. But I took on both my dogs and just let go (sigh!). Of course I still helped him some after that but it was not to be for much longe...

Reaching Out · Reaching Out

I haven't been to this group for a long time. I'm not a group person, mainly a loner. I married a recovering alcoholic 26 years ago. One of the foundations of our marriage was that he remain sober, and so he did for 18 of those. I couldn't have asked for a kinder man, a more trustworthy partner, or bette...

RainyJamie · RainyJamie

I took the kids camping without AH. I told him if he wanted he could catch up. He said he would come later and bring the dog. He did not show up for night #1. I drove to the nearest town next afternoon to check me messages. He happened to walk by my car. He was arrested at 2am the night before in that town for DUI....

kitty · kitty

Ok, this is off topic but I received this from my mom and it put a big smile on my face and made me feel happy. Take 2 minutes out of your day & you'll feel better too! http://worriersanonymous.org/Share/OnlyYou.htm

Tracy · Tracy

I am so confused I am not sure if my bf is an A or its something else he drinks but can stop after a couple the problem is he has always been very rebellious he drinks when things are bad but then takes coke this leads to the problems i can not live with e.g mood swings no money missing for days etc. I am not sure i...

Loupiness · Loupiness

Third times a charm. Twice today I wiped out my post with a quick flick of my fingers. Frustrating! My son is 15 and addicted to sugar. I do not keep soda in the house and I have very little junk food. Given his age and his associations, however, he has access to and consumes a lot. He also loves caffiene and p...

HEARTBROKEN IN NJ · HEARTBROKEN IN NJ

Its been 11 days since I spoke with my ex A b/f, now "friend from a distance". As you may recall, I took the advice from members on this board to detatch for a weekend and do things for me. Well, I have to admit this 'doing things for me' is GREAT. These past 11 days have been relaxing, fun, stre...

Tenderheartsks · Tenderheartsks

Boy howdy do I get a curve ball thrown into the works at times. This is the direct result of my youngest, who, when not binge drinking (which she doesn't come home when she's doing that as she knows my boundaries), insists on hooking back up with ex BFs that apparently she has memory loss of why they were an...

Suzannah · Suzannah

...Hello family...this is just a quickie as I am not in a position to talk with you as I would really like to at this moment in time. The situation with my daughter and her financee and here children has gone from bad to worse and, all the good intentions I had to give her and her boyfriend time out to get to kn...

suzip · suzip

I have been spending weekends at the beach with friends trying to escape from the rollercoaster life I live with my AH. How more relaxed can you get then looking out at the ocean, listening to the waves, how can you not smile? When I ran my 4 miles in the morning yesterday, I couldn't get rid of my stinkin th...

mslouise · mslouise

Well, I made it to work today. Almost called in sick but didn't. That, I can say, is a big progress for myself. I did not sleep one ounce last night and frankly have been down lately, but I pulled myself up and here I am. I spent the weekend on my first snorkling trip ever with my Abfsober. I was ve...

charlescharles · charlescharles

hello folks..its been a while i'm sitting here in a sort of amazed confusion as my a..who went out last night and got lit...who threatened suicide last week...is now asking me if i think she would make a good mother and if we could try and have a baby together i feel like she is out of here mind at this point y...

maire rua · maire rua

Dear All, The update on my step mother's illness is that all wish to keep her at home as long as possible. I do the washing and collecting at airports. We are very cordial with one another and though I feel pain at the situation, I practise detaching. I went to the seaside yesterday for a break which was gre...

teddybearpoet · teddybearpoet

Ok.. Its been a VERY looooooooooong time since i have done this.. I have missed coming to chat and to the posting boards.. however.. back to topic.. I have been feeling really lost lately.. have been having alot of feelings up all at once.. yesterday i journaled one page about it.. saying how i was not o...

nmike · nmike

Just checked my e-mail today after being out of town for several days. I had given up on this job because it is going on 4 weeks since I turned my application in. This job reopened so this is the second time around. So I have an interview next Friday. Woohoo! I haven't interviewed in years. I did buy a new out...

marchgrl · marchgrl

Hi Everyone! I used to be a member of this board years back and I just wanted to say hello to everyone! A little bit about me.... I was raised with an alcoholic mother. I became an alcoholic myself at age 18. I have been battling addiction/sobriety since age 27 when I vowed to quit. I have relapsed sinc...

Codependent · Codependent

Yes, I am still sitting here obsessing. I know I have to stop this. I think he can feel it and why I care what he thinks we all know. I want to be different, but I think I want to be different because I think this will earn a positive reaction from him. You know what I mean? I want to stop calling him, but par...

Gailey · Gailey

This morning my youger son and dil left for Japan to live for the next 3 years. They will come back for a visit Christmas 2009. My son is in the Navy and he met his wife in Japan when he was stationed there before. He will be on sea duty for this time. I am happy that she can be with her family while he is out to sea....

MotherTeresa · MotherTeresa

Okay, am obsessing, needing to vent, phew, working on not enabling. So when my son calls back about,losing wallet, car towed and, no ID at present to retrieve it. We(husband and me) had agreed...after many situations like this, we would not just send money etc. Anyhow, after husband spoke somewh...

codependent_who_knew · codependent_who_knew

My husband and I have been married for 6 years, together 7 and have two beautiful children together. We are soulmates.....when we met, we just knew,. Well, ong story short, we both have had crappy childhoods and we vowed to never allow that with ours.....He was using Vicodin about 5.5 years ago and wen...

liljeannie · liljeannie

Maybe this post should have been titled, two steps forward, one step back....Anyway, I went to work this morning, and if any of you read my post last night, you know I went there alone. No idea when abf came home from his walk, dont really care, I slept. Called him on my way home from work, he was happy, in...

liljeannie · liljeannie

Just when you think things are gonna blow up, he apologizes Just when you think you are gonna go stir crazy, he suggests a walk Just when you think you are getting old, he brings out the child in you Just when you think its gonna be a lousy day, he makes you smile... Funny, this was not my hp, it was my abf. If...

mcca9014 · mcca9014

Hi i am new here, but not new to al-anon. I have a 14 year old in recovery. I am proud of him but it is a hard road. He said his biggist problem is boredom. I have to work and so he has been alone a lot especially this week. He relapsed last night after 29 days. I am so disappointed and I am jealous of other moms who...

liljeannie · liljeannie

As I gain emotional independece from my A, my financial situation is sooo completely dependent upon him. I hate this. I hate having to bite my tongue so that this doesnt get thrown in my face. Today I went to lunch with two of my sons, who are grown and live with their dad, early 20's, a friend, and her son...

twinkie · twinkie

its been a while since I've posted.... and I find myself totally stressed out, irritable and trying to force solutions... I was doing so well, so what happened? In a very stressful job with a lot of intensity - lots of politics - it gets to be too mcuh for me. Lots of folks work non-stop and on the weekends...

Karilynn · Karilynn

((((((Family)))), Thanks for all your love and prayers for Pipers and I. Piper the Pouncing Puma is doing much better. She swatted my cheek yesterday morning in order to get me up! I let her outside yesterday. I know the vet said not to, but it greatly improved her mood. I take her back on Monday for a...

saponilady · saponilady

Hi this is my first time posting. I have a sister that is 5 years younger than me with an 8-year-old daughter. My sister is an alcoholic and meth addict. She has been going through this for almost 10 years but just recently came out in the open and sought treatment last year....sad thing is she is on...

sadako · sadako

my A boyfriend has had problems and i've posted about them here. always, he's apologized or made some sort of amend. always, he's said "i love you and i want to be with you forever." i know that may be a cliche, but i'm 42 and very ill and disabled, i live in housing, i'm on the dole completely - i a...

Sincerely · Sincerely

The Glue That Holds It Together! It makes me sick!!! I am tired of being the glue! My A had a court date today which stemed from an arguement with the neighbors. He left his cash at home and asked me to bring it to him so that he could bond out. I was at work. I didn't get in an uproar, but it did make me nerv...

DaddysLilGirl · DaddysLilGirl

Hi everyone! It's been over 2 years since I've been on this forum, but I just got another email reminding me about it and I decided to log on. Here's a quick recap as to why I started coming on here in the first place. Alcoholism runs in my family....the one that hits home the most is my father. My father...

suzip · suzip

I started running Memorial Day weekend and havent looked back. When people used to tell me there is a runners high I used to say huh?? Now I know what they mean. My life with my Ah keeps me on a rollercoaster of emotions days are up and then then they come crashing down, but the only thing I have is control ove...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hi all, I wrote in my previous post today about being upset with my addict husband and waiting for him to come home after being gone all night. Well I did what I normally do when I am so angry I can't put two thoughts together, I cleaned house. I figure it is a great way to release all that negative energy and h...

Peggy7 · Peggy7

We had a "situation" last night, our oldest son and his fiance' were in a terrible fight. They live close enough that he came to our home just moments before we headed off to bed. The husband and I "listened" step one in service. We did not tell him what to do. We did make a few &q...

suzip · suzip

Isn't this the best way to look at life in general? Trying to live thru this day only, not tackle all my problems at once...sometimes it is hard to do, not to look ahead at what is to come. It gets overwhelming to wonder about the future, what if this or that, lets just live for today. -- Edited by suzip at 18...

albertarose · albertarose

Hello! Not sure if this is the right place to seek some suggestions on this topic or not, but I will give it a try. Over the past little while in our closed meetings a few members are bringing their children to the meetings. The children are 0-9 years of age. Now, I know this is a family disease and noone shou...

mslouise · mslouise

If you have read my last post I have been down lately. Very stressed, family issues, abfsober lost job, etc. So for the last couple of days, I have not been smiling too much. My bf keeps asking me what is wrong, what has changed? Frankly, now-a-days, I am trying to work out some of my own stuff by my...

Alone · Alone

Does the maddness ever end? Besides being married to an A, my brother is a meth addict. Recently he ask me to write a letter to a judge saying he's been attending NA, this would keep him from going to jail. Why can't he write his own letter? I don't get it, why wouldn't he just attend NA now he wants to com...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Last night I had this conversation on the phone with a guy I chatted with on the internet and again I think I'm doomed to be alone until I leave this place... BUT The interesting thing was that the guy started talking about how he was going to get back together with his ex girlfriend and when I asked him why s...

alliecat · alliecat

Just wanted to say hi...Would someone respond so i can see if anyone was able to read this.... Cathy

queenie105 · queenie105

Hi Family, You may recall my post from the other day about AH being home from rehab and me being terribly unhappy about it. While I try to work my program to the best of my ability, I do know that attitude, and how I react to things plays an important role in my recovery. Could it be that he's lied to me so muc...

wildthang86 · wildthang86

It is odd that after all I have been through in the past week that I am back in a place where I have been ohhh so many times before. I last spoke to my AH at 5:17 yesterday and have not heard from at all since then. It is now 9:40 a.m.. My old ways are so wanting to come back, call him just to see if he answers. Go over...

Jen57 · Jen57

Hi - I'm brand new here and new to Al Anon, too. My husband is a constant complainer: his job, little things that happen, our house, how he feels, etc. I would wager that at least 50% of his comments throughout the day are negative. He whines and whines and does little or nothing to take care of his problems...

Tracy · Tracy

Just been to a f2f wow the topic was choices within my share I explained I find it very easy to see what choices should make to improve their lives however my choices tend to be better for other not me. lately I have been maker better choices because I am worried about the impact on my kids. Also I realise I...

txlexi2 · txlexi2

I have been unable to access the chatroom at all today. Is anyone else having trouble or is it just my comp acting up?

MotherTeresa · MotherTeresa

Hi, My husband is 30 years sober , son alcoholic...sometimes drug use. Son has a history of depresssion, and escalating alcohol use, has lived away, then home for a couple of years. He left home abruptly 2 weeks ago to get work in a new city. Detaching...with love is my aim. I have been back to Alanon aft...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	My letter was well received (Preview) As some may recall, I was tossing thoughts about in my head about contacting my ex ABF to see how he was doing in rehab. While ultimately I decided not to call him directly, I did email his brother (who I was always close with) to get an update. Apparently my ex is doing 'ok' although according to his brot...	HEARTBROKEN IN NJ	2	548	Aug 20, 2008 by kitty
	Seeing my AD Labor Day Weekend... (Preview) and I have no idea how I am going to handle it right now. Things have not been good between us recently because he basically stops drinking when we come down and then starts right back up as soon as we leave. This has been the trend now for over a year. He "recognizes" that he has a problem but will...	shawn306	5	717	Aug 20, 2008 by shawn306
	Too good to be true (Preview) I knew it would be too good to be true. Last sunday I asked him to lend me some money so I could pay for my college fee's. He said yeah but then went on a bender and spent all his wages (which I didnt know about till I was ready to pay the fee's). Anyway that night he told me he let me down and he got upset and he said h...	mum2leahnjosh	8	524	Aug 20, 2008 by maire rua
	Gift of Fear (Preview) Hi everyone, I don't know if anyone has the opportunity to watch Oprah today, but Gavin de Becker (I think that is his name) will be on the show to talk about fear warning us to protect ourselves. FEAR is not always false evidence appearing real. Sometimes it is a warning. He will be discussing how to know...	kissers	5	570	Aug 20, 2008 by Lady
	Having faith in myself (Preview) Two of my college classes started yesterday. My youngest had done some online classes through an adult education center, and they used the Blackboard system. I had also taken a few online courses through University of Phoenix. Yesterday once I got logged on, I was overwhelmed! I am a very computer li...	Tenderheartsks	6	729	Aug 20, 2008 by thinkstoomuch
	How do I explain the disease (Preview) At a meeting last week a newcomer asked how do I explain the disease of alcoholism to a 12 year old boy. This boy has been raised by his grandparents and has a lot of anger and resentment built up against his mother. Any ideas on how to do this so that the young man will understand?	Mobirdie	6	607	Aug 20, 2008 by thinkstoomuch
	Why do you stay..... (Preview) with your addict?	suzim	16	769	Aug 19, 2008 by Loupiness
	Neurotic (Preview) This morning I keep thinking about how my A thinks I am neurotic. He always comments on how "bad" I feel about everything and how I worry all the time, etc. The times we have used together- not that distant past- I have always started feeling guilty soon after (the next morning) and often cri...	Codependent	4	3060	Aug 19, 2008 by Tenderheartsks
	Seeking last minute advice (Preview) Okay Family, my A will be back in this country and at my house in seven days. I'm excited, and scared, and happy, and NERVOUS. It's been 11 years since I've seen him, and there's been lots of water under the bridge since then. In these 11 years, I've learned about strength and forgiveness. I've learn...	round3	9	718	Aug 19, 2008 by round3
	Even after all these years (Preview) Hello everyone! I am so happy to find this forum. I have been in and out of Al-anon for 15 years. Course by in and out that means I am pretty sick. As soon as the Alcoholic gets his life together, I am out the door..... stupid! stupid! I was introduced to Al-anon when my dad sobered up years ago. I was raised...	dnlmangels	3	580	Aug 19, 2008 by Peggy7
	24 hours "clean" (Preview) Well, I have now gone 24 hours without calling the A since he didn't come to watch movies last night or even call to say he wasn't coming. I know he had child support court this morning and from his mother I know he went. However, I have not called him or his friends,etc, to find out what happened. It is sca...	Codependent	5	556	Aug 19, 2008 by maresie
	Finally....reality! (Preview) Finally after a year of wondering about the A, and back to crying over love songs.....missing my husband, I listened to my heart and went to see him. I had no expectations. All I knew was I could not call him, and I am sure he is not opening my letters. Needed to get a dose to get me to see again,that my AH who u...	debilyn	7	617	Aug 19, 2008 by junehouse
	What is the proper tool here? (Preview) I do understand that everyone gets tired of the same story- especially my family. I also hope that I am not taking advantage of this board by venting every situation that comes up. But, it's like as soon as they are happening I think about telling you guys to get your feedback. However, I know you all g...	Codependent	7	662	Aug 19, 2008 by maresie
	Back to Reality (Preview) I have been spending weekends at the beach with friends trying to escape from the rollercoaster life I live with my AH. How more relaxed can you get then looking out at the ocean, listening to the waves, how can you not smile? When I ran my 4 miles in the morning yesterday, I couldn't get rid of my stinkin th...	suzip	1	344	Aug 19, 2008 by Jen
	Sorry it's just the same old post (Preview) I took the bait today. He called and "pretended" to be jealous that I didn't call him all weekend etc,.. Told his mom he thought I was seeing someone else though he told me he didn't care who I was sleeping with in a nasty tone. I told him I thought we had better conversations in jail. He said...	Codependent	8	608	Aug 19, 2008 by maresie
	one year on reality is hard! (Preview) I am one year out from letting the A go. Last September I had finally had it and found a place (albeit barely on survival) and cut my losses with the A. Well I took huge huge losses. But I took on both my dogs and just let go (sigh!). Of course I still helped him some after that but it was not to be for much longe...	maresie	7	556	Aug 19, 2008 by maresie
	When love dies (Preview) I haven't been to this group for a long time. I'm not a group person, mainly a loner. I married a recovering alcoholic 26 years ago. One of the foundations of our marriage was that he remain sober, and so he did for 18 of those. I couldn't have asked for a kinder man, a more trustworthy partner, or bette...	Reaching Out	14	761	Aug 19, 2008 by gaelle
	to woe or not to woe (Preview) I took the kids camping without AH. I told him if he wanted he could catch up. He said he would come later and bring the dog. He did not show up for night #1. I drove to the nearest town next afternoon to check me messages. He happened to walk by my car. He was arrested at 2am the night before in that town for DUI....	RainyJamie	12	756	Aug 19, 2008 by Jean4444
	Feel Happier Right Now (Preview) Ok, this is off topic but I received this from my mom and it put a big smile on my face and made me feel happy. Take 2 minutes out of your day & you'll feel better too! http://worriersanonymous.org/Share/OnlyYou.htm	kitty	1	446	Aug 19, 2008 by J.R.
	scared (Preview) I am so confused I am not sure if my bf is an A or its something else he drinks but can stop after a couple the problem is he has always been very rebellious he drinks when things are bad but then takes coke this leads to the problems i can not live with e.g mood swings no money missing for days etc. I am not sure i...	Tracy	4	555	Aug 18, 2008 by nmike
	addiction in its infancy? (Preview) Third times a charm. Twice today I wiped out my post with a quick flick of my fingers. Frustrating! My son is 15 and addicted to sugar. I do not keep soda in the house and I have very little junk food. Given his age and his associations, however, he has access to and consumes a lot. He also loves caffiene and p...	Loupiness	5	421	Aug 18, 2008 by nmike
	11 days and counting (Preview) Its been 11 days since I spoke with my ex A b/f, now "friend from a distance". As you may recall, I took the advice from members on this board to detatch for a weekend and do things for me. Well, I have to admit this 'doing things for me' is GREAT. These past 11 days have been relaxing, fun, stre...	HEARTBROKEN IN NJ	2	452	Aug 18, 2008 by maresie
	Staying focused on me and my goals (Preview) Boy howdy do I get a curve ball thrown into the works at times. This is the direct result of my youngest, who, when not binge drinking (which she doesn't come home when she's doing that as she knows my boundaries), insists on hooking back up with ex BFs that apparently she has memory loss of why they were an...	Tenderheartsks	4	583	Aug 18, 2008 by maresie
	Back to step one AGAIN...and feeling so very very low... (Preview) ...Hello family...this is just a quickie as I am not in a position to talk with you as I would really like to at this moment in time. The situation with my daughter and her financee and here children has gone from bad to worse and, all the good intentions I had to give her and her boyfriend time out to get to kn...	Suzannah	4	559	Aug 18, 2008 by maresie
	Back to Reality (Preview) I have been spending weekends at the beach with friends trying to escape from the rollercoaster life I live with my AH. How more relaxed can you get then looking out at the ocean, listening to the waves, how can you not smile? When I ran my 4 miles in the morning yesterday, I couldn't get rid of my stinkin th...	suzip	0	370	Aug 18, 2008 by suzip
	Figuring things out! (Preview) Well, I made it to work today. Almost called in sick but didn't. That, I can say, is a big progress for myself. I did not sleep one ounce last night and frankly have been down lately, but I pulled myself up and here I am. I spent the weekend on my first snorkling trip ever with my Abfsober. I was ve...	mslouise	1	420	Aug 18, 2008 by suzip
	new topic (Preview) hello folks..its been a while i'm sitting here in a sort of amazed confusion as my a..who went out last night and got lit...who threatened suicide last week...is now asking me if i think she would make a good mother and if we could try and have a baby together i feel like she is out of here mind at this point y...	charlescharles	5	990	Aug 18, 2008 by maresie
	Practicing detaching (Preview) Dear All, The update on my step mother's illness is that all wish to keep her at home as long as possible. I do the washing and collecting at airports. We are very cordial with one another and though I feel pain at the situation, I practise detaching. I went to the seaside yesterday for a break which was gre...	maire rua	2	581	Aug 18, 2008 by maresie
	Where do i go from here???? (Preview) Ok.. Its been a VERY looooooooooong time since i have done this.. I have missed coming to chat and to the posting boards.. however.. back to topic.. I have been feeling really lost lately.. have been having alot of feelings up all at once.. yesterday i journaled one page about it.. saying how i was not o...	teddybearpoet	5	527	Aug 18, 2008 by Maria123
	I have an job interview (Preview) Just checked my e-mail today after being out of town for several days. I had given up on this job because it is going on 4 weeks since I turned my application in. This job reopened so this is the second time around. So I have an interview next Friday. Woohoo! I haven't interviewed in years. I did buy a new out...	nmike	12	698	Aug 18, 2008 by maire rua
	I'm Back! (Preview) Hi Everyone! I used to be a member of this board years back and I just wanted to say hello to everyone! A little bit about me.... I was raised with an alcoholic mother. I became an alcoholic myself at age 18. I have been battling addiction/sobriety since age 27 when I vowed to quit. I have relapsed sinc...	marchgrl	2	440	Aug 17, 2008 by cookie1971
	Confrontation (Preview) Yes, I am still sitting here obsessing. I know I have to stop this. I think he can feel it and why I care what he thinks we all know. I want to be different, but I think I want to be different because I think this will earn a positive reaction from him. You know what I mean? I want to stop calling him, but par...	Codependent	2	556	Aug 17, 2008 by Tracy
	a little sad today (Preview) This morning my youger son and dil left for Japan to live for the next 3 years. They will come back for a visit Christmas 2009. My son is in the Navy and he met his wife in Japan when he was stationed there before. He will be on sea duty for this time. I am happy that she can be with her family while he is out to sea....	Gailey	4	489	Aug 17, 2008 by Karilynn
	Frustration with blame-shifting son (Preview) Okay, am obsessing, needing to vent, phew, working on not enabling. So when my son calls back about,losing wallet, car towed and, no ID at present to retrieve it. We(husband and me) had agreed...after many situations like this, we would not just send money etc. Anyhow, after husband spoke somewh...	MotherTeresa	2	519	Aug 17, 2008 by joyoma
	New to this, not sure how this work, wondering if anyone has experienced this before? (Preview) My husband and I have been married for 6 years, together 7 and have two beautiful children together. We are soulmates.....when we met, we just knew,. Well, ong story short, we both have had crappy childhoods and we vowed to never allow that with ours.....He was using Vicodin about 5.5 years ago and wen...	codependent_who_knew	12	571	Aug 17, 2008 by liljeannie
	Tears and Swears (Preview) Maybe this post should have been titled, two steps forward, one step back....Anyway, I went to work this morning, and if any of you read my post last night, you know I went there alone. No idea when abf came home from his walk, dont really care, I slept. Called him on my way home from work, he was happy, in...	liljeannie	1	437	Aug 16, 2008 by ddub
	Just when you think.... (Preview) Just when you think things are gonna blow up, he apologizes Just when you think you are gonna go stir crazy, he suggests a walk Just when you think you are getting old, he brings out the child in you Just when you think its gonna be a lousy day, he makes you smile... Funny, this was not my hp, it was my abf. If...	liljeannie	3	484	Aug 16, 2008 by Sincerely
	mom of teen in recovery (Preview) Hi i am new here, but not new to al-anon. I have a 14 year old in recovery. I am proud of him but it is a hard road. He said his biggist problem is boredom. I have to work and so he has been alone a lot especially this week. He relapsed last night after 29 days. I am so disappointed and I am jealous of other moms who...	mcca9014	3	539	Aug 16, 2008 by mcca9014
	the beginning of the end (Preview) As I gain emotional independece from my A, my financial situation is sooo completely dependent upon him. I hate this. I hate having to bite my tongue so that this doesnt get thrown in my face. Today I went to lunch with two of my sons, who are grown and live with their dad, early 20's, a friend, and her son...	liljeannie	3	629	Aug 16, 2008 by maresie
	in a bad place (Preview) its been a while since I've posted.... and I find myself totally stressed out, irritable and trying to force solutions... I was doing so well, so what happened? In a very stressful job with a lot of intensity - lots of politics - it gets to be too mcuh for me. Lots of folks work non-stop and on the weekends...	twinkie	2	520	Aug 16, 2008 by maresie
	Piper the Prodigious, Persistent, Pouncing Puma! (Preview) ((((((Family)))), Thanks for all your love and prayers for Pipers and I. Piper the Pouncing Puma is doing much better. She swatted my cheek yesterday morning in order to get me up! I let her outside yesterday. I know the vet said not to, but it greatly improved her mood. I take her back on Monday for a...	Karilynn	15	1416	Aug 16, 2008 by maresie
	I Can Detach W/ No Problem...My Issue Is This.... (Preview) Hi this is my first time posting. I have a sister that is 5 years younger than me with an 8-year-old daughter. My sister is an alcoholic and meth addict. She has been going through this for almost 10 years but just recently came out in the open and sought treatment last year....sad thing is she is on...	saponilady	5	765	Aug 16, 2008 by maresie
	the love, the relationship: all of it, lies (Preview) my A boyfriend has had problems and i've posted about them here. always, he's apologized or made some sort of amend. always, he's said "i love you and i want to be with you forever." i know that may be a cliche, but i'm 42 and very ill and disabled, i live in housing, i'm on the dole completely - i a...	sadako	3	735	Aug 16, 2008 by sadako
	The Glue That Holds It Together...Me (Preview) The Glue That Holds It Together! It makes me sick!!! I am tired of being the glue! My A had a court date today which stemed from an arguement with the neighbors. He left his cash at home and asked me to bring it to him so that he could bond out. I was at work. I didn't get in an uproar, but it did make me nerv...	Sincerely	6	550	Aug 16, 2008 by Tenderheartsks
	Great Progress!!!! (Preview) Hi everyone! It's been over 2 years since I've been on this forum, but I just got another email reminding me about it and I decided to log on. Here's a quick recap as to why I started coming on here in the first place. Alcoholism runs in my family....the one that hits home the most is my father. My father...	DaddysLilGirl	1	615	Aug 16, 2008 by CJ
	getting healthy for me (Preview) I started running Memorial Day weekend and havent looked back. When people used to tell me there is a runners high I used to say huh?? Now I know what they mean. My life with my Ah keeps me on a rollercoaster of emotions days are up and then then they come crashing down, but the only thing I have is control ove...	suzip	6	563	Aug 16, 2008 by Jean4444
	A spiritual Awakening while cleaning??????? (Preview) Hi all, I wrote in my previous post today about being upset with my addict husband and waiting for him to come home after being gone all night. Well I did what I normally do when I am so angry I can't put two thoughts together, I cleaned house. I figure it is a great way to release all that negative energy and h...	Mandy123	8	696	Aug 16, 2008 by Peggy7
	My example (Preview) We had a "situation" last night, our oldest son and his fiance' were in a terrible fight. They live close enough that he came to our home just moments before we headed off to bed. The husband and I "listened" step one in service. We did not tell him what to do. We did make a few &q...	Peggy7	4	616	Aug 15, 2008 by Dale
	one day at a time (Preview) Isn't this the best way to look at life in general? Trying to live thru this day only, not tackle all my problems at once...sometimes it is hard to do, not to look ahead at what is to come. It gets overwhelming to wonder about the future, what if this or that, lets just live for today. -- Edited by suzip at 18...	suzip	3	487	Aug 15, 2008 by Jean4444
	Concerns about children in a closed meeting (Preview) Hello! Not sure if this is the right place to seek some suggestions on this topic or not, but I will give it a try. Over the past little while in our closed meetings a few members are bringing their children to the meetings. The children are 0-9 years of age. Now, I know this is a family disease and noone shou...	albertarose	14	1580	Aug 15, 2008 by Jim C.
	Catch 22 and advise needed on son (Preview) If you have read my last post I have been down lately. Very stressed, family issues, abfsober lost job, etc. So for the last couple of days, I have not been smiling too much. My bf keeps asking me what is wrong, what has changed? Frankly, now-a-days, I am trying to work out some of my own stuff by my...	mslouise	8	580	Aug 15, 2008 by mcca9014
	Tell me the Truth (Preview) Does the maddness ever end? Besides being married to an A, my brother is a meth addict. Recently he ask me to write a letter to a judge saying he's been attending NA, this would keep him from going to jail. Why can't he write his own letter? I don't get it, why wouldn't he just attend NA now he wants to com...	Alone	16	727	Aug 15, 2008 by CJ
	My disease (Preview) Last night I had this conversation on the phone with a guy I chatted with on the internet and again I think I'm doomed to be alone until I leave this place... BUT The interesting thing was that the guy started talking about how he was going to get back together with his ex girlfriend and when I asked him why s...	carolinagirl	9	621	Aug 15, 2008 by maresie
	Hello (Preview) Just wanted to say hi...Would someone respond so i can see if anyone was able to read this.... Cathy	alliecat	2	393	Aug 15, 2008 by canadianguy
	Anyone have experience w/A getting out of rehab, how to cope? (Preview) Hi Family, You may recall my post from the other day about AH being home from rehab and me being terribly unhappy about it. While I try to work my program to the best of my ability, I do know that attitude, and how I react to things plays an important role in my recovery. Could it be that he's lied to me so muc...	queenie105	11	945	Aug 15, 2008 by mokoehn
	As I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil (Preview) It is odd that after all I have been through in the past week that I am back in a place where I have been ohhh so many times before. I last spoke to my AH at 5:17 yesterday and have not heard from at all since then. It is now 9:40 a.m.. My old ways are so wanting to come back, call him just to see if he answers. Go over...	wildthang86	6	751	Aug 15, 2008 by mokoehn
	Unhooking from complaining? (Preview) Hi - I'm brand new here and new to Al Anon, too. My husband is a constant complainer: his job, little things that happen, our house, how he feels, etc. I would wager that at least 50% of his comments throughout the day are negative. He whines and whines and does little or nothing to take care of his problems...	Jen57	11	1115	Aug 15, 2008 by thinkstoomuch
	choices (Preview) Just been to a f2f wow the topic was choices within my share I explained I find it very easy to see what choices should make to improve their lives however my choices tend to be better for other not me. lately I have been maker better choices because I am worried about the impact on my kids. Also I realise I...	Tracy	5	593	Aug 15, 2008 by Jean4444
	chatroom unavailable? (Preview) I have been unable to access the chatroom at all today. Is anyone else having trouble or is it just my comp acting up?	txlexi2	2	324	Aug 14, 2008 by wp
	Sad and concerned, first post (Preview) Hi, My husband is 30 years sober , son alcoholic...sometimes drug use. Son has a history of depresssion, and escalating alcohol use, has lived away, then home for a couple of years. He left home abruptly 2 weeks ago to get work in a new city. Detaching...with love is my aim. I have been back to Alanon aft...	MotherTeresa	6	753	Aug 14, 2008 by lin0606
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.