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Gloom and Doom
(Preview)
Good Morning to All! MY youngest son (33) just called and it ALWAYS is him talking gloom and doom. I am SO working on my own recovery in Alanon-working on stress, anxiety etc. with my adult kids and my 83 yr. old MOm. I have health issues of my own.....but this youngest son always calls and usually he is st...
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meagain
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1
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334
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AH was in the Cardio Care Unit over the weekend
(Preview)
My AH returned home about a month and half ago. I knew he was having problems with his blood pressure and getting under control. He was taking meds but they weren't working. We went to a cardiologist September 26th and scheduled a heart catherization to see what was going on with his heart. He had a block...
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wildthang86
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2
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451
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perspective
(Preview)
I was just reading a response to a prior post, and Canadianguy's mentioning of perspective. He spoke of a friend and her son...with a terrible heart condition...and of their daily bravery and courage. As a mom myself, and a cancer survivor myself....this touches me deeply and makes me remember to ge...
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Fifi
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1
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485
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The other side of boundaries is scary.....
(Preview)
Hi Al-Anon family! Before I get started on my post - just a quick thanks to all who post and reply here. It gives me great comfort and more than a few ideas about how to handle my recovery. I last posted several weeks ago that I had finally understood that I needed to have a boundary. This was quite the realiz...
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Rocky38
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5
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537
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Just talk to me...
(Preview)
Please, just talk to me, say anything you like, I will listen. You are my f2f meeting and I need to hear you talking to each other and me...I am in a bad place and I just need to know you are out there. I know this might sound crazy but crazy is me at this moment in time. Just got back from another trip to the doc'...
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Suzannah
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9
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500
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Anxious
(Preview)
My husband will be released from the DOC tomorrow. He has spent the past 12 months as a ward of the DOC for felony DUI and bail jumping. He was originally sentenced to 6 months of state provided re-hab and he was kicked of one program, sent to another and kicked out of that as well - as a result he had to spen...
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grizmom
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1
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377
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Taking care of ourselves
(Preview)
As I evolve in the program I find myself less and less able to tolerate being around people who don't take care of themselves. One of my recently acquired friends is a man who has a great deal of sobriety (its a lot). Nevertheless he doesn't take care of himself at all. If I point it out to him he gets reall...
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maresie
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7
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442
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What do I do? Any feedback?
(Preview)
Wondering if you all can answer a question? Here's the deal as quick as i can say it: IF someone asked for help with thier alcoholism and then you gave them the info and they didnt choose to do it or call the numbers, or do whatever it was, should others be doing it for them since they asked for help but may...
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MommaMia14
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7
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593
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Failures/Successes
(Preview)
Last week completely exhausted me with medical appointments, medical procedures, and caring for my grandbaby part of each day and nearly 12 hours on Friday. So today I am trying to clear my brain and rest my body. I had something very unpleasant happen yesterday. I wasn't feeling well but went out to...
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joyoma
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6
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358
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I can liken myself to a computer!
(Preview)
Ya see when my AH was actively drinking I had a programme, it didn't work at all but it was the only one I was familiar with, I played it and played it over and over, jeez I would crash times and would still try to restart to no avail, i tried to scan my hard drive for errors and I found loads but I just couldn't...
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Katy
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1
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438
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Granddaughter is Being Christened!
(Preview)
My baby granddaughter, Delilah is scheduled to be christened on Nov. 2. See, I got rid of my AH, and the blessings just keep on coming! I never thought my daughter and her husband would have her christened. He was brought up in a VERY religious household, so therefore, didn't care much for organized r...
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Becky1
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3
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425
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joy & pain
(Preview)
I can only hope that the trend of deep pain in this program is often a spring board to really great joy. The prequel is so very difficult though. Saturday I had this wonderful dialogue with AH and felt like we were getting somewhere for once. I used all my al anon tools while talking, totally different b...
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ddub
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3
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457
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Dissolution Final Today
(Preview)
Today, I will take a deep breath as I walk away from my AH for the last time. And I won't look back. I moved out in July, was the hardest thing I've ever done. But once I "let go and let God" you wouldn't believe the blessings that have been heaped on me. Once I quit fighting and struggling with l...
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Becky1
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7
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481
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ABF off the wagon..Me 8 mos. Pregnant...long vent
(Preview)
Please help. I know there are those out there who have been through this and have some story to tell me that will help me make a good decision about what to do.
I am 36 weeks pregnant and my ABF has been sober and so wonderful for the past two months with no incident. I put up strict boundaries but in no way ha...
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lonewolfmama
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5
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551
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ABF tried to kill himself
(Preview)
I haven't posted here in a long time. I need to stay close to the program because I am living in fear. Last Monday my ABF took 10-12 Adavan and drank way too much. I am so scared for him I don't know what to do. He is in rehab once again. And I went to family group this last weekend and family day. I know tha...
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serenity041807
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10
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580
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self reliance
(Preview)
I am now more than one year out from leaving the A and moving out on my own. I am also over the hurdle of just craving for someone to come along and rescue me. I do most things myself and no longer crave for someone to help me. Some days it is pretty hard and other days I feel like I have been self reliant all my l...
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maresie
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5
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488
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From best friends to a feeling of great loss...
(Preview)
I have a best friend who is a recovering alcoholic. My attitute toward the friend is "always a friend, no matter what." However, since seeking help and treatment in 2000, he has become distant and very nervous around me. He claims we are still friends, but his actions don't show it. I don't s...
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dekare
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5
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525
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How to get my life together again? :)
(Preview)
I wrote a really long post, but basically it's this. I want to move out of the house, where I'm currently living with my parents & younger sister.. There's just too many of us in the house, & conflicts keep arising... (None of them is alcoholics, but there are/have been alcoholic relatives, ...
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learning76
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4
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490
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devastated
(Preview)
Hi...First time on. Tonight was the kick in the butt to finally ask for some help. I picked him up from detox yesterday. He spent the night here ( we seperated 2 mths a go), told me he loves me so much, cannot live w/out me blah blah blah. I brought him home today so he could clean his urine/ empty bottle fille...
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soconfused
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5
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585
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CREATING BALANCE WITHIN OURSELVES
(Preview)
PAGE 102 * new book on discovering choices * Those of us who have lived with the effects of alcoholism can become obsessed with the behavior of others. We spend time analyzing behavior, figuring out motives , and identifying what we deem is wrong with the people in our lives. In Al-Anon we learn that e...
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abbyal
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7
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1081
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What Has Al-Anon Done For You?
(Preview)
(To the MIP family) For those that would like I thought it would be a good idea to share your story, the before and after of Al-Anon becoming a part of your life. Where you were. Where you are. What the program has done for you. It could be good for newbies or guests whose life is or has been affected by...
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RLC
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9
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682
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It was a good weekend
(Preview)
I'm finally able to post something positive. My daughther and I had a great weekend. Got stuff to redecorate her bathroom (in pink, I know the A will hate it but I don't care), went out to eat, then went to the auction. I know my hp directed me to the auction. I happend to win the bid on a rug and I had been loo...
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buick23
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6
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382
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Again feeling your pains!!
(Preview)
geez A' are a pain in the patooty. shaking head. Still could in no way do what a lot of you go thru. Since i did not have to be in a vehicle with the A I talk about, I hired him to do work around here. He really did well as far as he got, I paid him well. Sadly it was me staying away from him as he worked. If I was there...
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debilyn
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2
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464
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answers, that bring more questions
(Preview)
my A-ex-boyfriend had emergency surgery on his spine (the first surgery went wrong) and he asked if he could come stay with me, would i help him with dressing changes and other little things. i said yes, as long as he didn't bring his way of taking out his anger on me back with him. so far so good, he's gotte...
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sadako
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3
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499
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Feeling Mean
(Preview)
I have not seen my AGF since last Sun. She has been on a 'bender'. We did not speak all week as I felt like I needed some space. We have been in text contact. She reckoned that she was dry since thursday. Today she drove 16 miles to my house whilst I was at work to 'see me' but left before I got back. As it turned ou...
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Brizzle Gal
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5
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506
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An update...yay!
(Preview)
Hi everyone! I am officailly moved back in with my husband! I am very happy about it, too! It was tough but I got in done in time! Stress was & still is there but I am getting through. Also, my AH ended up in the hospital because of diabetes. He almost died but got to the ER in time. His Blood Sugar was o...
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Hoot Nanny
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2
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423
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trying to remember to be thankful
(Preview)
It has been a year since my ex A BF left...and as I have mentioned we recently had a chance to talk and heal a bit. He has been sober nearly 2 years now...that is my history here of becoming "sober" from my own old patterns,too.
It has brought so much up for me though.....I remember the pain and...
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Fifi
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2
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404
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My Confession
(Preview)
Dear Family, I think I told you that I have been in real trouble since 1 September when I had my fall. During the last three days I have had so many friends visiting me and have been tracing back over the last month or so. Now I can confess. The drugs that the doctors at the hospital had insisted that I take ha...
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Suzannah
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5
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482
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For all of you....
(Preview)
(((((family))))) As I am writing, I am smiling. A real, true smile. A smile of contentment, a smile of satisfaction, a smile of proof that miracles really DO happen if we truly seek them. I havent posted for a while as I have been so busy taking care of me. This is something that was new to me, but has now...
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liljeannie
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4
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529
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An old friend
(Preview)
I am struggling trying to find an old friend that I met in kindergarten. I have tried to get ahold of her recently but was unable to. This really gets to me because I considered her my best friend for many years. Anyway, it has been 20 years since I talked to her and I really want to hear from her. I just wan...
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Hoot Nanny
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2
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394
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went to first meeting
(Preview)
I went to my first meeting last night, and it was really good. Close to home and nice and cozy, 7 of us there. I talked for a few minutes, and it was great!!! Just coming to the realization that there are LOTS of people out there going through the same stuff as me and having the same feeling as myself. I have be...
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ryanvancouver
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4
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580
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Relationship question
(Preview)
My husband has been home for 30 days, he was loving and touching,kissing and all of that. since he has been back it is like he does not want to touch me at all...i know about the new relationship thing ..but what about the wife...does it mean that no hugging until he is better..really confused here...
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harleywoman
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5
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570
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Get those mamograms!
(Preview)
(((((Family))))), Just my annual, gentle reminder that October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month. We need to get our mamograms, do our self-exams and in general take good care of ourselves. Men, this means you too. Men can and have gotten breast cancer. A colleague of mine, found a lump, had a mamo...
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Karilynn
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2
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452
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isolation keeps coming up
(Preview)
I am very new at this and counting the hours until my first meeting this eve. Going through some of the other posts i have seen a few about isolation. To be more specific, the A i have been involved with has been talking about selling everything he owns and just taking off. He hates his job (liked it last wee...
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ryanvancouver
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10
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546
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New here...husband has a drinking problem...what to do?
(Preview)
Ok, I'll try and summarize my story. I've been married almost 33 years. We have 3 grown children not living at home. I discovered a year ago that my husband was hiding and drinking hard liquor. After being confronted, he vowed to try and stop on his own. Well, you probably know how that went. He seems to ha...
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MsSue
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9
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3495
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shop now and avoid the rush
(Preview)
Hi fellow Alanons, Wow, this coming Friday is my 1 year anniversary in Alanon. Thank you all so much for your wonderful support and unconditional love. I look forward to continued recovery with all of you as we work our amazing program. Best - always, Paul
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norwood
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6
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566
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brand new to all this, any advice?
(Preview)
hey there. My doctor has been suggesting al-anon to me for years but i haven't gone. What can i expect? My relationship is pretty much done, i have had enough of my partners constant drinking, anger, etc...i find that the more of a jerk he is, the more i jump through hoops to make him happy. needless to say...
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ryanvancouver
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8
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581
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it just doesn't seem to get any better
(Preview)
I'm at the point where I just want to end the relationship (if that's even what I can call it). Yesterday, I mentioned something that needed to be done and he made an argument out of it. It doesn't matter anymore if I argue back, or nicely state my opinion on matters, or say nothing. The last thing he yelled...
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buick23
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5
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618
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advice needed help me get back to detachment.
(Preview)
As you all know I live in a place that is incredibly dysfunctional. The other night I came home to find some woman rifling through the back yard (where I have my plants and other stuff). Her son had lived in the house and she was looking for something there god knows what he lived upstairs. I was absolutel...
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maresie
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9
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458
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stay positive
(Preview)
I have a very dear friend who is battling multiple cancers in her body. She has such a positive outlook on her life and her situation, and is an inspiration to me and everyone who knows her. When I get down about my situation with my Ah and worry about paying bills and everything else I tend to worry about I t...
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suzip
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3
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481
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Just some questions.... responses greatly appreciated
(Preview)
I have questions that may sound silly but I am curious and when I'm curious, I ask! If an individual that is employed is an alcoholic, gets sent to detox then to rehab are they entitled to disability benefits? Are they entitled to resume their employment position when the get out of rehab? What if t...
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HEARTBROKEN IN NJ
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6
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533
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New....feeling very alone.
(Preview)
Hi guys, My boyfriend went to his first AA meeting a week ago...has stayed sober since (the longest time since we've been together). I'm very proud of him and I've been to a few meetings with him as well as a few Al anon for myself. All of a sudden though....I feel more alone than ever. He has a lot of A ten...
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reef999
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10
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663
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challenging day .. and it's only 8:30am
(Preview)
Getting from the bed to my desk this morning was probably like most other mornings. I just notice some morning "rituals" more on some days - like today.
You start it out waiting your turn for the bathroom because you only have one and the two teenagers living in your home have decided the ne...
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nalani
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0
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382
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something in me
(Preview)
something in me feels like it is dying this is scarey it has happended to me before. this is the part in my program where i always turn back. higher power has brought this issue [defect] to my attention more than once. when i pray for wisdom and higher power brings something to my attention, by way of mor...
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jewely
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3
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501
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I feel like a stupid idiot!!!!!! When will I learn!!!!!
(Preview)
I am such a stupid idiot!!!! My sister just pointed out something to me that I know see clearly and I fell for it again. I told my sister that I texted my ex telling him that I thought he did a good thing by calling someone in his AA group. This was after the fact I told him he doesn't have to pay me back becaus...
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mslouise
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9
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677
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Off this planet and back to earth with a crash...
(Preview)
Dear Family and Debilyn, so sorry I have been absent...but that fall I had on 1 September took me into hospital and I have not been well since. What with the medication that sent me on the weirdiest voyage into the unknown depths of stupor and feeling so spaced out that I thought I had been sent to Mars; I h...
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Suzannah
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3
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536
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So many emotions
(Preview)
If you raed my last post, you know that I replied to my "BF" in what I thought was a cold reaction to his apology for being drunk on Sunday night after being sober for three weeks. Well, it's true what many say--the A will always return! He called today to see if he could pick some stuff up at the...
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hopeful123
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6
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437
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Part 2 - will I ever sleep again
(Preview)
Thank you for your response to my last post. I was more than please to see that I was viewed as working the program. Surprised, actually. Yay, for me. Gonna work on getting some ambien. It continues... The fear that I have been harboring, second only to the bookkeeper being fired, is my AH's g/f becom...
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Loupiness
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6
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496
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when does the anger and suspicion start to fade?????
(Preview)
I need some help guys. I am really trying to focus on me and my newfound program and have attended 2 f2f mtgs and have started reading many of the recommended books. HOWEVER, it seems the littlest things set me off and I end up ranting and becoming furious with my ASoberBF. I just don't have any trust anymo...
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masspedirn
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12
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748
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Rollecoaster ride starts again
(Preview)
Here I am again, thinking about my sober A husband. About a month ago he started doubting his program, hating the world, wanting to run away again. For about a week I lived with this knot in my stomach, again. I was not sleeping, again. I was watching every little thing he did, again. We got past it. He call...
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MBJ
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7
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607
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How do you ever get over these issues?
(Preview)
I know that I need to focus on me and detach from my A hubby, but here is the thing, I have a strong suspicion that he cheated on me. I dont want to say I can deal with the drinking part, knowing that darn well I cant, but I can deal with that better than I can sitting here thinking he cheated on me. How am I ever goi...
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princessloretta
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9
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523
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Just need to vent..
(Preview)
Hey everyone, I feel like Im making steps in the right direction, those of you who know me will know its a step, I had little to no real boundaries until about a week ago when I grew stronger from being here, knowing the A typical behavior of an A and that i'm not alone really made me want to start trying for a...
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Erica
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6
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453
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What to do ??
(Preview)
Dear ((All)) My Abf who is not wanting contact from me?? whilst he is in rehab, called last night. It was bad news, he was on a days outing with his rehab and he had an accident, he broke his leg. He was calling me from the hospital, and was just out of surgery. It's a pretty nasty injury and things are going t...
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Mariner
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4
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543
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I find myself...
(Preview)
After more than two years of being single - still hesitant to do what it takes to get involved in another relationship. I talk to various guys, then when it comes time to meet I only meet the ones I know already that I don't like. If there's a chance I MAY like them, I hmmmm and hawwww until the opportunit...
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carolinagirl
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3
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361
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Taking other people's inventory vs. telling the truth
(Preview)
I was over a friend's house who is in the program and he showed me a birthday card from his daughter. She had written in the card that she will always be there for him. I felt sick to my stomach when I read that sentence. I wound up lying and saying that it was a nice card, then couldn't figure out if I should hav...
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kissers
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13
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8229
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most paths are dead ends!
(Preview)
Need some translation of A behaviour here. Returned from an al anon wkend retreat and pockets filled with hugs, approval, appreciation, laughter, reflection, a ha moments etc so the transition to home can be a tough reality, I know. I was trying ........ A is trying to be so nice, make supper, cons...
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ddub
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4
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808
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will I ever sleep again?
(Preview)
Hi Friends, I am just a bundle of nerves. I want to disappear. Spoke with my sponsor, a friend, and read some literature, and I can't stop crying. The fear overwhelms me. I know all the slogans, that faith needs to replace fear, odat, lean on God, but I just feel so alone. Can't make the connection. N...
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Loupiness
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6
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654
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Did I react wrong?
(Preview)
I found this site last night and I am very grateful for it. My A boyfriend of 2 years and I "broke up" almost two months ago. We own a house together, but he moved out and has since been living with his A friend. I have had several emotions about all of this. Obviously hurt, bc I love him and I feel li...
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hopeful123
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13
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598
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Alcoholic Parent
(Preview)
Hi, I am new to this and am looking for advise. My mother has been an alcoholic for the past 15 years, approximatly. Every time we've confronted her in the past she would deny the problem. She has FINALLY admitted she had a problem and begun her path to sobriety. We are so proud of her for taking this...
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Want to help
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4
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585
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last time
(Preview)
So I talked to my ex this morning because I had to find out about the bank account and if he received his unemployment check or not so I could close the account and be done with it. He also owes me money. I called him and he said he got his check in the mail and thought the account had been closed already (he k...
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mslouise
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5
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417
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