Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Slugcat · Slugcat

I have had an alki step father. I am a recovering alki myself. Whats got me twisted up is a loved ones other addiction though. When he talks about his plans and schemes how he is going to control this addiction. What do I say back? Oh thats great? I dont want to say that is great. I want to yell GO TO A DAMN 12 St...

michellelong · michellelong

After coming home from dropping my AH off at jail for the next two nights, one of 19 more from his last DUI, my telephone rang, it was one of his friends that has been sober for 6 years. This is someone who I thought I could count on to help me talk some sense into my AH but has turned out to be nothing more than an...

MariaM · MariaM

My life is out of control, a friend I respect said I should try al-anon... I went to a local meeting on a day I got sent home from work, it was okay I guess. Most of the people were WAY older than me and I felt a little singled out. There are not any local meetings in my area that are outside of my work hours.There...

Pushka · Pushka

I noticed that there seems to be a theme on anger recently, .. lol .. not that I haven't had my share of that emotion recently. It keeps creeping in on me and I have to remember what is mine, his and ours together .. lol. Last week I heard a great quote, I swear I thought I had read it here on the boards I know i...

oldergal · oldergal

When I starting reading Alanon literature I couldn't really get a grasp on what enabling was and separating it from compassion. I was helped by many and now I can boil it down to one sentence. "Do not do for others what they can and should do for themselves" This helped me and then it wasn't so c...

michellelong · michellelong

I'm sorry to keep venting but I am hoping this is what the board is for. I am not having a good day like I hoped for and I don't understand why! As I have said in a previous post, my AH is in jail serving the third of 22 weekends from a DUI back in January. He comes home at 6PM tomorrow. He calls me but sounds distan...

Mylife · Mylife

I am new to this forum. I have an alcoholic mother, she got sober about 11 years ago as the result of being admitted to the hospital after a bad fall and being diagnosed with cirrhosis of the liver. It took her about a month to fully detox and then another month in physical therapy to learn how to walk again....

tweety23 · tweety23

Hi all, I haven't posted in a while.. I am feeling a little down the last few days and need to vent. I feel like my life is over. Don't mean that as dramatically as it sounds, ie I am dying, but just the fun and adventure and good times for me are done. Right now my entire goal and focus is on my kids, that they...

HAguirre · HAguirre

Is it normal to feel like nothing is happening nothing is moving forward. i have the book for alanon i admit my life is unmanigable i admit i am powerless i have gave it to god even though it still hurts I dont understand how or where i am supose to do now. How come i'm not feeling better what do i do with the bo...

michellelong · michellelong

I'm brand new to the group, been looking for something like this for a long time. I have been married to an alcoholic/drug abuser for 6 years. The longest he has gone without anything is 11 months. I have had 2-5 month periods of happiness as well but it never lasts. I am to the point where I never know if he i...

maresie · maresie

An alcoholic who lived next to me has finally been evicted. He had a small dog who I was feeding by the time he left. If I had his phone number I'd probably still be feeding him. I detached a great deal from him over the year he lived next to me. Nevertheless his chaos, constant crises and complete and tota...

luv123 · luv123

Tradition 7 self supporting-declining outside contributions I remember reading a nice forum article from way back in the 80's. It dilineated ways we could apply tradtions to our home and family life. This tradition was especially helpful to me while I was learning to apply the Al-anon principl...

ditto · ditto

http://www.statesman.com/opinion/insight/texas-expert-addiction-science-has-taken-giant-steps-1642154.html

canadianguy · canadianguy

Hi gang.... just wanted to re-post this today, about the importance of "balance" in our lives.... even with respect to recovery stuff vs. other stuff - whether it is dealing with our A's specifically, or life in general.... For me, I had a tendency to try and find "too much recover...

lacewing · lacewing

I remember when I first came to recognize that Alcohol was possibly, at least part of the problem in my marriage. I was so desperate to learn what was wrong with my family, wrong with me and wrong in general. I wanted to fix it, understand it and get as far away from what was happening as I could. I had trie...

Debilyn · Debilyn

Would you who have a child who is A please share about this? Of course I appreciate everyones shares too. My friend is struggling. Xeno you are so right, and you reminded me of things thank you My friend from High school I have always called my brother came over very upset. His darn son who is around 23, got...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am so glad to be in the same boat w/ you all! The reason: we are not all drowning! We can all be grateful that we have the support we need right here! I have so much hope today that I never thought possible. I mention this quite often lately because I have finally found it & hope you will all too! After so m...

canadianguy · canadianguy

Really pleased to announce that we have a new Board Moderator, effective immediately..... RLC (Rodney) has agreed to become a Moderator, and I am thrilled to have the help. He has been a valuable member of our family for a long time on MIP, and will be a valuable addition to our group. When I look at t...

MAR2011 · MAR2011

A couple months ago my A went into a clinic for detox, they told him he would have died if he continued to try to do it on his own. Up until Thursday night, he was sober 8 weeks. Those 8 weeks were fantastic, stress free, happy times. He's the best man I've ever met when he's sober. Because of a DUI in December,...

HAguirre · HAguirre

I am new to this whole life style. My husband has just started an IOP program and he is sober now for over 30 days. I am proud of him but i feel like i am left in the dust. I am still trying to see where i belong and what i do to fix me. I have been reading alot about codependency and slowly realizing that is me, beca...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am getting old even though most people think 45 is young! Yeah, tomorrow is my birthday. I am looking forward to celebrating like I always do! Today was the start of my partying! I hope I don't get a hangover--not from drinking but from all the excitement! I just got back from lunch w/a dear friend; bles...

ELEKTRAWMN · ELEKTRAWMN

Just received a call from ABF. Mind you, I AM at work.... the only one of the two of us that is currently employed.... He got in touch with his lawyer.... the Solicitor wants to throw the book at him really hard... so here comes the blame game again... 24 week Drug/Alcohol program... 18 week family vi...

surfingmaestro · surfingmaestro

Hi Everyone, Lately throughout my day I have noticed that my mind starts going to deep dark places. I start to worry about things related to my AW in recovery, family, future, past, etc. Essentially all of these worries have already been handed over to my HP through working the steps (currently on s...

oldergal · oldergal

Written by Andy Rooney, a man who has the gift of saying so much with so few words. learn..... That the best classroom in the world is at the feet of an elderly person. .... That when you're in love, it shows. .... That just one person saying , 'You've made my day!'will make your day. Learn.......

meagain · meagain

Recently I started to a alonon meeting again-and YES i have a sponsor, which I am very happy about. My youngest son (36) got a DUI about 2 months ago-and I know I sure needed help again. I grew up with a "A" brother-now he is addicted to Oxcy...:(anyhooow I have 3 adult sons 36,37 and 38 and I di...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

I know that many of you are used to living with someone who is mired in their own problems, addictions, or selfishness so that's why I'm posting. Lately, I have been very down in regards to my marriage. My dh is looking for a new job and he's completely obsessed with his problems at work. The issue is th...

clep · clep

Today I realized it is my day off. I have someone else covering for me and it was planned a while ago. I forgot about it. I sit here today thinking, what should I do? I didn't have a clue. I was fighting to figure something out and couldn't think of anything. I realized today that I nurture myself in the w...

ifa · ifa

I know there is no point even thinking about this, since it is over and done, and doesn't even matter to begin with. However, any time I am rejected I always wonder if it could have been my fault, or if they rejected me because I am worthless, etc. I was friends with Luna for over 10 years. We met in a 12 step gr...

GailMichelle · GailMichelle

Hi All, In some of my posts, I mention that I had gone through many years of counseling and that I still had a lot of emotional baggage regarding my marriage. My baggage has been significantly reduced since attending meetings for the past 5 months. I attribute this "weight" loss to the mem...

KLotus · KLotus

I am grateful for this message board. I don't feel I have many trusted places to turn at the moment (whether real or perceived). I'm glad that I feel grateful for anything right now. My AH was distant and seemingly angry yesterday. I respected that he didn't want to talk about it, but struggled with h...

youfoundme · youfoundme

I may or may not be able to post this in full so I will post just a couple excerpts, but its something I feel that I am being led to share: From ODAAT in alanon July 20 pp202 "Everytime I catch myself trying to figure out other people's motives, I'll stop and ask myself: "What did I say or do that pr...

parfait624 · parfait624

I haven't been on here for a while. I have been out trying to live my life and not think about my ABF. The last time I spoke to him was the end of May, he said that I was stalking him and that I was crazy. Then two seconds later he said when I get too close he has to run for a while and he feels like he is losing God....

stephaniej · stephaniej

Two weeks ago I lost my job. No severance, and my former employer is going to fight my unemployment claim. I have been considering leaving my AH. Unfortunately, these events will make that impossible. As any one of us could have predicted, his drinking is escalating. I have reason to believe tha...

Jennifer · Jennifer

OK yes me and the moostiff have been cooped up inside with the air conditioning for a few days now so granted his actions and my thoughts are getting a bit goofy ... but ... This morning every time my music cycle has turned to a specific song he starts barking and dancing around the house. Since it seems he h...

youfoundme · youfoundme

Last night at my home group meeting, I was talking after the meeting with my alanon friend and a gentleman. The man is a self proclaimed double winner, that white knuckled it for 23 years before he came to AA and Alanon which he says makes it easier to not drink (7 years ago he came to the meetings). He was...

Lyne · Lyne

Ok so I pushed my spouse to make an appt. with the CASAC, I asked her if she made a 2nd one, I want her to change, I need our marriage to change, and I know all this thinking is wrong, wrong, wrong. I need a brain tune-up. I know the Serenity Prayer. I know I can only change myself. I still want her to change ...

hoyasfan123 · hoyasfan123

My mom just kicked my alcoholic dad out of the house. He went to rehab about 2 months ago, but relapsed, and so she kept her word. My question is - do I contact him to talk about it? Let him feel alone for awhile so (hopefully) he realizes the consequences? This sucks...he just visited me, and seemed to be do...

ifa · ifa

If my qualifier doesn't call me after a certain amount of time -- say 12 hours -- I start to worry that he never will. Then I get a feeling of intense sorrow. If I try calling him and he doesn't answer, it gets worse and worse. I wonder if this is simply because I love him and we don't live together? Or does it me...

Megthompson · Megthompson

hi all just an update on 3rd al anon face to face meeting i lusaka, zambia, africa. attendance was back up to 4 with one new person which was great.its not so scary taking the meetings as it was 2 meetings ago so thats also nice.its going great and i am truly grateful. had a bit of a dilemma 2 days before thoug...

alanonnewbie · alanonnewbie

Hi everyone, I am new to this so hopefully this posts right. Anyway, I am feeling really depressed lately, while at the same time I am also very relieved. It is a kind of bitter sweet feeling. My boyfriend of 3 years, who I have been trying to help with his alcohol addiction ever since I discovered his prob...

tommyecat · tommyecat

Good morning yall, I don't know about you guys but last night when I went to sleep, someone took my peaceful brain and substituted squirrel cage thinking in there. I have no idea what I was dreaming of, but it sure feel like there was a lot of activity going on. The committee in my head apparently had a gr...

flopadopilus · flopadopilus

I haven't had a good sob yet, but I feel it coming on. I felt like laughing and crying at the same time walking out of the courthouse. It all feels so bittersweet right now after 15 years of my exAH being a main part of my life. I have been counting down since I filed in February and now it came to pass. I even sho...

MeTwo2 · MeTwo2

there's a sticker i read recently that says, "never listen to the things you tell yourself when you're hungry, angry, lonely, tired, etc.," Great sticker, but tonight it's pretty hard. Trying to keep the focus on me and Not the alcoholic but failing miserably. Keep being the key word .. I...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I don't know what y'all think but I am happy when recovery is mentioned on TV. I find it very refreshing! I was watching a show yesterday(let it be nameless) that mentioned AA more than once & that the gal is in recovery from alcohol/drug addiction--anyhow, she took her father to an AA meeting &...

alexmaui · alexmaui

My AH was brought, by ambulance into the hospital. He had been drinking and taking ambien...he was hallucinating and raving. Two days later he is still not rational but he is ranting the wants to go home. We don't live together anymore he lives by himself...Can they release him? He wont go into treatme...

AnnieMar · AnnieMar

Hi, everybody.. A few minutes ago I put the word 'snooping' in this board's search engine, and I was amazed at how enlightening it was for me to read the posts. It was as if people were channeling me and what I was feeling and doing. To make a long story short, I'd lately been compulsively snooping on m...

Jozie · Jozie

Live & Let Live! For me, it has taking these Last 2+ years to really HEAR what this Says to me! Because I thought I was LIVING in the existence of my life, and here I come to find out that I was Only Making Waves! It says in my Book that if I am Living, I need be living Fully, richly, & happily to fulfi...

pineapple · pineapple

It's 5 am here and I've been awake since 3 am. This has been going on for over a week now. I'm tired all day but still have trouble sleeping at night. When I do manage to fall asleep I'm awake again 2 or 3 hours later and can't get back to sleep. I think that it is partly because of the new living arrangement with...

Pushka · Pushka

So I've done a lot of thinking out loud, and last night was a major no sleep zone for me. I know I have to identify what my issue is before I can shut my brain off for the night. After many months of good sleep, it didn't work out so well the past week. I will say so far as I plan on totally sleeping tonight! Da...

Tracy · Tracy

I HATE ALCOHOLISM. sorry my prtner is starting to slip on a regular basis agin after 9 months sobriety it was six months last time. He has done six months rehab, 3 months dry house and now he is drinking on and off and all the crap is starting. I just can not be hurt anymore. I am getting better I m starting...

countrygirl14437 · countrygirl14437

My friend is at 46 days sober and she is struggling today, anyone got a great quote i can send her to help with positivity?

Debilyn · Debilyn

I know why but it is so awful. I went on a discussion list.CL in the disabilities one. All I asked was how are you treated with your service dog. OMGOSH it was horrible! I could not believe how mean, ignorant, rude they were! It was like they were looking for a kitten to kick! Well geez just saying that made m...

hawaiilover · hawaiilover

Hello to all: I am believing in my HP to open doors for a new job. It has been a bit challenging emotionally these past days. Whew! I did not expect to feel so much emotional pain. I've been through this road before. Just wanted to share and release it. Hopefully I feel better soon. It just hurts so much. Ha...

Ness · Ness

This popped up in my email this morning.....hope you like it too ....................................................... A young lady confidently walked around the room while leading and explaining stress management to an audience; with a raised glass of water, and everyone knew she was go...

chinup · chinup

my sister,the only one out of 6 of us started seaking to me agin,couldnt pour sugar on her quick enough that it would melt for over a yr now ,well i allowed her to have yardsales in my yard only for her to run off leavening me with the mess and all the stuff that didnt sale so i called her sevearal times to get it...

likemyheart · likemyheart

Hello all - I have a story to relate and hopefully some of you will see the humor I do. For 9 months now AH and I have been separated and every time he gets mad at me (with increasing frequency) everything bad in his life is my fault. It's like he's got a tape recorder set on a loop replaying the same ole same ole...

youfoundme · youfoundme

I feel kind of sad today, I guess meloncholly(spelling?) really. I feel like a need a hug. Does that make sense? LOL... I talked to my alanon friend and I think this week I am going to ask her to sponsor me. I will see her Wednesday. I feel it should be done in person and not over the phone. I guess I am s...

Pushka · Pushka

I am giving myself a very big pat on the back because I made a very conscious decision not to turn this into the DUI, I'm right your wrong weekend. HOW IMPORTANT IS IT?! It wasn't .. lol. Oh my that would have been so easy to do and I admit I had the itch a couple of times. It's more important to me to allow the...

tommyecat · tommyecat

Does anyone here love to laugh? Here are a few one liners that just set me off into the stratosphere when I heard it in a meeting. My experience has been that when I am unwilling to ask for help, and I insist that I can do it all myself, I'm just a drunk talking to a crazy person. I thought I was so cool. T...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am here again taking advantage of the library system on this computer! I have to try to get on here as much as possible because I need to focus on the Alanon program today! I am so grateful that I can be OK sharing about just about anything. My anniversary is tomorrow as I have mentioned in a previous post....

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	what do I say (Preview) I have had an alki step father. I am a recovering alki myself. Whats got me twisted up is a loved ones other addiction though. When he talks about his plans and schemes how he is going to control this addiction. What do I say back? Oh thats great? I dont want to say that is great. I want to yell GO TO A DAMN 12 St...	Slugcat	5	640	Jul 25, 2011 by youfoundme
	Tired of Enabler's (Preview) After coming home from dropping my AH off at jail for the next two nights, one of 19 more from his last DUI, my telephone rang, it was one of his friends that has been sober for 6 years. This is someone who I thought I could count on to help me talk some sense into my AH but has turned out to be nothing more than an...	michellelong	6	576	Jul 25, 2011 by youfoundme
	Hello (Preview) My life is out of control, a friend I respect said I should try al-anon... I went to a local meeting on a day I got sent home from work, it was okay I guess. Most of the people were WAY older than me and I felt a little singled out. There are not any local meetings in my area that are outside of my work hours.There...	MariaM	13	642	Jul 25, 2011 by youfoundme
	A share (Preview) I noticed that there seems to be a theme on anger recently, .. lol .. not that I haven't had my share of that emotion recently. It keeps creeping in on me and I have to remember what is mine, his and ours together .. lol. Last week I heard a great quote, I swear I thought I had read it here on the boards I know i...	Pushka	2	374	Jul 25, 2011 by youfoundme
	Thoughts on Enabling and Anger (Preview) When I starting reading Alanon literature I couldn't really get a grasp on what enabling was and separating it from compassion. I was helped by many and now I can boil it down to one sentence. "Do not do for others what they can and should do for themselves" This helped me and then it wasn't so c...	oldergal	3	803	Jul 25, 2011 by youfoundme
	Feeling the need to share again...and again... (Preview) I'm sorry to keep venting but I am hoping this is what the board is for. I am not having a good day like I hoped for and I don't understand why! As I have said in a previous post, my AH is in jail serving the third of 22 weekends from a DUI back in January. He comes home at 6PM tomorrow. He calls me but sounds distan...	michellelong	3	397	Jul 25, 2011 by michellelong
	I don't know what to do. (Preview) I am new to this forum. I have an alcoholic mother, she got sober about 11 years ago as the result of being admitted to the hospital after a bad fall and being diagnosed with cirrhosis of the liver. It took her about a month to fully detox and then another month in physical therapy to learn how to walk again....	Mylife	5	525	Jul 25, 2011 by Pushka
	Just random thoughts (Preview) Hi all, I haven't posted in a while.. I am feeling a little down the last few days and need to vent. I feel like my life is over. Don't mean that as dramatically as it sounds, ie I am dying, but just the fun and adventure and good times for me are done. Right now my entire goal and focus is on my kids, that they...	tweety23	3	394	Jul 25, 2011 by Pushka
	Standing still Still drowning (Preview) Is it normal to feel like nothing is happening nothing is moving forward. i have the book for alanon i admit my life is unmanigable i admit i am powerless i have gave it to god even though it still hurts I dont understand how or where i am supose to do now. How come i'm not feeling better what do i do with the bo...	HAguirre	2	482	Jul 24, 2011 by GailMichelle
	Depressed in NC (Preview) I'm brand new to the group, been looking for something like this for a long time. I have been married to an alcoholic/drug abuser for 6 years. The longest he has gone without anything is 11 months. I have had 2-5 month periods of happiness as well but it never lasts. I am to the point where I never know if he i...	michellelong	10	547	Jul 24, 2011 by tweety23
	Letting go (Preview) An alcoholic who lived next to me has finally been evicted. He had a small dog who I was feeding by the time he left. If I had his phone number I'd probably still be feeding him. I detached a great deal from him over the year he lived next to me. Nevertheless his chaos, constant crises and complete and tota...	maresie	6	516	Jul 24, 2011 by tommyecat
	Tradition 7 in dealing with my kids (Preview) Tradition 7 self supporting-declining outside contributions I remember reading a nice forum article from way back in the 80's. It dilineated ways we could apply tradtions to our home and family life. This tradition was especially helpful to me while I was learning to apply the Al-anon principl...	luv123	3	1018	Jul 24, 2011 by tommyecat
	The Science of Addiction (Preview) http://www.statesman.com/opinion/insight/texas-expert-addiction-science-has-taken-giant-steps-1642154.html	ditto	5	590	Jul 24, 2011 by ifa
	Balancing Act (Preview) Hi gang.... just wanted to re-post this today, about the importance of "balance" in our lives.... even with respect to recovery stuff vs. other stuff - whether it is dealing with our A's specifically, or life in general.... For me, I had a tendency to try and find "too much recover...	canadianguy	11	846	Jul 24, 2011 by GailMichelle
	The Blue Balloon (Preview) I remember when I first came to recognize that Alcohol was possibly, at least part of the problem in my marriage. I was so desperate to learn what was wrong with my family, wrong with me and wrong in general. I wanted to fix it, understand it and get as far away from what was happening as I could. I had trie...	lacewing	7	791	Jul 23, 2011 by GailMichelle
	When your child is your A (Preview) Would you who have a child who is A please share about this? Of course I appreciate everyones shares too. My friend is struggling. Xeno you are so right, and you reminded me of things thank you My friend from High school I have always called my brother came over very upset. His darn son who is around 23, got...	Debilyn	9	1537	Jul 23, 2011 by Debilyn
	in the same boat! (Preview) I am so glad to be in the same boat w/ you all! The reason: we are not all drowning! We can all be grateful that we have the support we need right here! I have so much hope today that I never thought possible. I mention this quite often lately because I have finally found it & hope you will all too! After so m...	Hoot Nanny	3	452	Jul 23, 2011 by luv123
	New Board Moderator (Preview) Really pleased to announce that we have a new Board Moderator, effective immediately..... RLC (Rodney) has agreed to become a Moderator, and I am thrilled to have the help. He has been a valuable member of our family for a long time on MIP, and will be a valuable addition to our group. When I look at t...	canadianguy	13	729	Jul 23, 2011 by lacewing
	Hurt, confused and scared...(long) (Preview) A couple months ago my A went into a clinic for detox, they told him he would have died if he continued to try to do it on his own. Up until Thursday night, he was sober 8 weeks. Those 8 weeks were fantastic, stress free, happy times. He's the best man I've ever met when he's sober. Because of a DUI in December,...	MAR2011	5	508	Jul 23, 2011 by xeno59
	New and dont know what to do? (Preview) I am new to this whole life style. My husband has just started an IOP program and he is sober now for over 30 days. I am proud of him but i feel like i am left in the dust. I am still trying to see where i belong and what i do to fix me. I have been reading alot about codependency and slowly realizing that is me, beca...	HAguirre	6	535	Jul 23, 2011 by hotrod
	getting old! (Preview) I am getting old even though most people think 45 is young! Yeah, tomorrow is my birthday. I am looking forward to celebrating like I always do! Today was the start of my partying! I hope I don't get a hangover--not from drinking but from all the excitement! I just got back from lunch w/a dear friend; bles...	Hoot Nanny	6	528	Jul 23, 2011 by youfoundme
	So mad I could spit nails! (vent) (Preview) Just received a call from ABF. Mind you, I AM at work.... the only one of the two of us that is currently employed.... He got in touch with his lawyer.... the Solicitor wants to throw the book at him really hard... so here comes the blame game again... 24 week Drug/Alcohol program... 18 week family vi...	ELEKTRAWMN	11	636	Jul 23, 2011 by hotrod
	Turning it Over to HP - advice needed (Preview) Hi Everyone, Lately throughout my day I have noticed that my mind starts going to deep dark places. I start to worry about things related to my AW in recovery, family, future, past, etc. Essentially all of these worries have already been handed over to my HP through working the steps (currently on s...	surfingmaestro	7	431	Jul 23, 2011 by hotrod
	Great Thoughts for the Day (Preview) Written by *Andy Rooney*, a man who has the gift of saying so much with so few words. learn..... That the best classroom in the world is at the feet of an elderly person. .... That when you're in love, it shows. .... That just one person saying , 'You've made my day!'will make your day. Learn.......	oldergal	8	3843	Jul 23, 2011 by hotrod
	Been away for awhile :(( (Preview) Recently I started to a alonon meeting again-and YES i have a sponsor, which I am very happy about. My youngest son (36) got a DUI about 2 months ago-and I know I sure needed help again. I grew up with a "A" brother-now he is addicted to Oxcy...:(anyhooow I have 3 adult sons 36,37 and 38 and I di...	meagain	2	402	Jul 23, 2011 by Pushka
	I need to vent, a bit OT (Preview) I know that many of you are used to living with someone who is mired in their own problems, addictions, or selfishness so that's why I'm posting. Lately, I have been very down in regards to my marriage. My dh is looking for a new job and he's completely obsessed with his problems at work. The issue is th...	ilovedogs	12	509	Jul 23, 2011 by Crazy Frog
	I don't have enough time by myself. (Preview) Today I realized it is my day off. I have someone else covering for me and it was planned a while ago. I forgot about it. I sit here today thinking, what should I do? I didn't have a clue. I was fighting to figure something out and couldn't think of anything. I realized today that I nurture myself in the w...	clep	5	488	Jul 22, 2011 by ifa
	ex friend (Preview) I know there is no point even thinking about this, since it is over and done, and doesn't even matter to begin with. However, any time I am rejected I always wonder if it could have been my fault, or if they rejected me because I am worthless, etc. I was friends with Luna for over 10 years. We met in a 12 step gr...	ifa	8	633	Jul 22, 2011 by ifa
	Private Counseling vs Al-Anon (Preview) Hi All, In some of my posts, I mention that I had gone through many years of counseling and that I still had a lot of emotional baggage regarding my marriage. My baggage has been significantly reduced since attending meetings for the past 5 months. I attribute this "weight" loss to the mem...	GailMichelle	26	3055	Jul 22, 2011 by Jennifer
	Down (Preview) I am grateful for this message board. I don't feel I have many trusted places to turn at the moment (whether real or perceived). I'm glad that I feel grateful for anything right now. My AH was distant and seemingly angry yesterday. I respected that he didn't want to talk about it, but struggled with h...	KLotus	8	711	Jul 22, 2011 by KLotus
	Today's reminder: ODAAT 7/20 and December 7 (Preview) I may or may not be able to post this in full so I will post just a couple excerpts, but its something I feel that I am being led to share: From ODAAT in alanon July 20 pp202 "Everytime I catch myself trying to figure out other people's motives, I'll stop and ask myself: "What did I say or do that pr...	youfoundme	3	497	Jul 22, 2011 by maryjane
	Not Again! (Preview) I haven't been on here for a while. I have been out trying to live my life and not think about my ABF. The last time I spoke to him was the end of May, he said that I was stalking him and that I was crazy. Then two seconds later he said when I get too close he has to run for a while and he feels like he is losing God....	parfait624	10	567	Jul 22, 2011 by ifa
	Drowning (Preview) Two weeks ago I lost my job. No severance, and my former employer is going to fight my unemployment claim. I have been considering leaving my AH. Unfortunately, these events will make that impossible. As any one of us could have predicted, his drinking is escalating. I have reason to believe tha...	stephaniej	5	436	Jul 22, 2011 by Otie
	The Moostiif Says I'm Beautiful (Preview) OK yes me and the moostiff have been cooped up inside with the air conditioning for a few days now so granted his actions and my thoughts are getting a bit goofy ... but ... This morning every time my music cycle has turned to a specific song he starts barking and dancing around the house. Since it seems he h...	Jennifer	3	672	Jul 22, 2011 by Pushka
	Your perspective? (Preview) Last night at my home group meeting, I was talking after the meeting with my alanon friend and a gentleman. The man is a self proclaimed double winner, that white knuckled it for 23 years before he came to AA and Alanon which he says makes it easier to not drink (7 years ago he came to the meetings). He was...	youfoundme	12	612	Jul 21, 2011 by maryjane
	Did everything wrong (Preview) Ok so I pushed my spouse to make an appt. with the CASAC, I asked her if she made a 2nd one, I want her to change, I need our marriage to change, and I know all this thinking is wrong, wrong, wrong. I need a brain tune-up. I know the Serenity Prayer. I know I can only change myself. I still want her to change ...	Lyne	6	560	Jul 21, 2011 by maryjane
	kicked out (Preview) My mom just kicked my alcoholic dad out of the house. He went to rehab about 2 months ago, but relapsed, and so she kept her word. My question is - do I contact him to talk about it? Let him feel alone for awhile so (hopefully) he realizes the consequences? This sucks...he just visited me, and seemed to be do...	hoyasfan123	8	619	Jul 21, 2011 by hoyasfan123
	hurt hurt hurt (Preview) If my qualifier doesn't call me after a certain amount of time -- say 12 hours -- I start to worry that he never will. Then I get a feeling of intense sorrow. If I try calling him and he doesn't answer, it gets worse and worse. I wonder if this is simply because I love him and we don't live together? Or does it me...	ifa	15	670	Jul 21, 2011 by ifa
	update 3rd face to face al anon meeting zambia,africa and advice requested (Preview) hi all just an update on 3rd al anon face to face meeting i lusaka, zambia, africa. attendance was back up to 4 with one new person which was great.its not so scary taking the meetings as it was 2 meetings ago so thats also nice.its going great and i am truly grateful. had a bit of a dilemma 2 days before thoug...	Megthompson	8	815	Jul 21, 2011 by Megthompson
	Advice and support needed ASAP ! (Preview) Hi everyone, I am new to this so hopefully this posts right. Anyway, I am feeling really depressed lately, while at the same time I am also very relieved. It is a kind of bitter sweet feeling. My boyfriend of 3 years, who I have been trying to help with his alcohol addiction ever since I discovered his prob...	alanonnewbie	6	594	Jul 21, 2011 by Pushka
	zzzzzz's (Preview) Good morning yall, I don't know about you guys but last night when I went to sleep, someone took my peaceful brain and substituted squirrel cage thinking in there. I have no idea what I was dreaming of, but it sure feel like there was a lot of activity going on. The committee in my head apparently had a gr...	tommyecat	10	560	Jul 21, 2011 by Pushka
	Officially divorced as of this morning! (Preview) I haven't had a good sob yet, but I feel it coming on. I felt like laughing and crying at the same time walking out of the courthouse. It all feels so bittersweet right now after 15 years of my exAH being a main part of my life. I have been counting down since I filed in February and now it came to pass. I even sho...	flopadopilus	12	765	Jul 21, 2011 by KLotus
	Irrational Alcoholic & Me Too !! Grr (Preview) there's a sticker i read recently that says, "never listen to the things you tell yourself when you're hungry, angry, lonely, tired, etc.," Great sticker, but tonight it's pretty hard. Trying to keep the focus on me and Not the alcoholic but failing miserably. Keep being the key word .. I...	MeTwo2	7	4516	Jul 21, 2011 by MeTwo2
	recovery on TV (Preview) I don't know what y'all think but I am happy when recovery is mentioned on TV. I find it very refreshing! I was watching a show yesterday(let it be nameless) that mentioned AA more than once & that the gal is in recovery from alcohol/drug addiction--anyhow, she took her father to an AA meeting &...	Hoot Nanny	4	654	Jul 20, 2011 by All I can be
	How long does Detox take? (Preview) My AH was brought, by ambulance into the hospital. He had been drinking and taking ambien...he was hallucinating and raving. Two days later he is still not rational but he is ranting the wants to go home. We don't live together anymore he lives by himself...Can they release him? He wont go into treatme...	alexmaui	6	530	Jul 20, 2011 by Debilyn
	Snooping (Preview) Hi, everybody.. A few minutes ago I put the word 'snooping' in this board's search engine, and I was amazed at how enlightening it was for me to read the posts. It was as if people were channeling me and what I was feeling and doing. To make a long story short, I'd lately been compulsively snooping on m...	AnnieMar	18	980	Jul 20, 2011 by Pushka
	My Lead :) (Preview) Live & Let Live! For me, it has taking these Last 2+ years to really HEAR what this Says to me! Because I thought I was LIVING in the existence of my life, and here I come to find out that I was Only Making Waves! It says in my Book that if I am Living, I need be living Fully, richly, & happily to fulfi...	Jozie	2	1247	Jul 20, 2011 by youfoundme
	OT-help for insomnia? (Preview) It's 5 am here and I've been awake since 3 am. This has been going on for over a week now. I'm tired all day but still have trouble sleeping at night. When I do manage to fall asleep I'm awake again 2 or 3 hours later and can't get back to sleep. I think that it is partly because of the new living arrangement with...	pineapple	12	813	Jul 20, 2011 by Debilyn
	Responsibility (Preview) So I've done a lot of thinking out loud, and last night was a major no sleep zone for me. I know I have to identify what my issue is before I can shut my brain off for the night. After many months of good sleep, it didn't work out so well the past week. I will say so far as I plan on totally sleeping tonight! Da...	Pushka	6	693	Jul 20, 2011 by Doozy
	disease on the attack again, again again (Preview) I HATE ALCOHOLISM. sorry my prtner is starting to slip on a regular basis agin after 9 months sobriety it was six months last time. He has done six months rehab, 3 months dry house and now he is drinking on and off and all the crap is starting. I just can not be hurt anymore. I am getting better I m starting...	Tracy	8	618	Jul 20, 2011 by Doozy
	In need of a positive quote (Preview) My friend is at 46 days sober and she is struggling today, anyone got a great quote i can send her to help with positivity?	countrygirl14437	8	673	Jul 20, 2011 by Unityforall
	Mean and bitter people and stuff (Preview) I know why but it is so awful. I went on a discussion list.CL in the disabilities one. All I asked was how are you treated with your service dog. OMGOSH it was horrible! I could not believe how mean, ignorant, rude they were! It was like they were looking for a kitten to kick! Well geez just saying that made m...	Debilyn	7	687	Jul 19, 2011 by Jennifer
	Facing a layoff isn't easy (Preview) Hello to all: I am believing in my HP to open doors for a new job. It has been a bit challenging emotionally these past days. Whew! I did not expect to feel so much emotional pain. I've been through this road before. Just wanted to share and release it. Hopefully I feel better soon. It just hurts so much. Ha...	hawaiilover	7	449	Jul 19, 2011 by hawaiilover
	Stress management (Preview) This popped up in my email this morning.....hope you like it too ....................................................... A young lady confidently walked around the room while leading and explaining stress management to an audience; with a raised glass of water, and everyone knew she was go...	Ness	11	512	Jul 19, 2011 by oldergal
	need to vent,sick n tired of being used by family (Preview) my sister,the only one out of 6 of us started seaking to me agin,couldnt pour sugar on her quick enough that it would melt for over a yr now ,well i allowed her to have yardsales in my yard only for her to run off leavening me with the mess and all the stuff that didnt sale so i called her sevearal times to get it...	chinup	4	517	Jul 19, 2011 by flopadopilus
	My fault too? (Preview) Hello all - I have a story to relate and hopefully some of you will see the humor I do. For 9 months now AH and I have been separated and every time he gets mad at me (with increasing frequency) everything bad in his life is my fault. It's like he's got a tape recorder set on a loop replaying the same ole same ole...	likemyheart	11	708	Jul 19, 2011 by flopadopilus
	Need a hug (Preview) I feel kind of sad today, I guess meloncholly(spelling?) really. I feel like a need a hug. Does that make sense? LOL... I talked to my alanon friend and I think this week I am going to ask her to sponsor me. I will see her Wednesday. I feel it should be done in person and not over the phone. I guess I am s...	youfoundme	13	653	Jul 19, 2011 by flopadopilus
	Weekend Update .. (Preview) I am giving myself a very big pat on the back because I made a very conscious decision not to turn this into the DUI, I'm right your wrong weekend. HOW IMPORTANT IS IT?! It wasn't .. lol. Oh my that would have been so easy to do and I admit I had the itch a couple of times. It's more important to me to allow the...	Pushka	2	458	Jul 19, 2011 by flopadopilus
	Heard in a meeting (Preview) Does anyone here love to laugh? Here are a few one liners that just set me off into the stratosphere when I heard it in a meeting. My experience has been that when I am unwilling to ask for help, and I insist that I can do it all myself, I'm just a drunk talking to a crazy person. I thought I was so cool. T...	tommyecat	9	621	Jul 19, 2011 by flopadopilus
	just me again & again! (Preview) I am here again taking advantage of the library system on this computer! I have to try to get on here as much as possible because I need to focus on the Alanon program today! I am so grateful that I can be OK sharing about just about anything. My anniversary is tomorrow as I have mentioned in a previous post....	Hoot Nanny	3	515	Jul 19, 2011 by flopadopilus
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