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Need ESH ...
(Preview)
My son called me from where he is at.. Still out of state he said he just got out of the mental hospital.. He wanted to committ suicide when he left the ranch and went to a hospital and they admitted him. They released him and he said he has not eaten and wants to find his way back to go back to a sober living and s...
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Gaby
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10
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477
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rainy days and Mondays, blackouts and promises used to get me down
(Preview)
I called my A brother...the one who got snarky w/me because i refused a visit from him unless my terms were met...AA....Sobriety....Sustained programme work, THEN we TALK about a visit... His response was the usual...I can zerox it and use it for the next time.... I told him how he treated me and how I w...
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neshema2
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4
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311
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Well i THINK it is finally sinking in, LOL
(Preview)
When i was last on this board....b4 the long MIA trip I did, I had no probs thinking I belonged here bc I was wading in A's....Oh no...not marriage...but my family.....i was letting my brothers and yes, dear friends, "get to me" and so i needed alanon BIG tme then I go AWOL and this last comeba...
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neshema2
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4
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387
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Some Christmas good advice from the pets
(Preview)
My pets are out of luck....I am going next door...
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neshema2
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4
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175
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Today's Gift Taken from the AA Board
(Preview)
Slow down and let go On a road trip up the California coast a while back, I tried to call home only to find that the battery in my cell phone had died. I worried. What if someone needed to get in touch with me? What if there was a problem with the house? What if my family couldn't find me and got worried? I passed...
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Cathyinaz
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12
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448
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12 Steps 12 Stories: Spiritual messages of recovery for children and the child in you.
(Preview)
Hi all....ordered this book for my recovering A son. Has anyone ever read it. My 13 year old granddaughter has been having a lot of questions regarding alcoholism. This should share with them the 12 steps and why my son goes to so many meetings and just how those meetings help him. I am excited about him r...
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Gailey
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2
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304
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Shunned from Christmas (but I have a program)
(Preview)
Well, they're getting sicker. Father never contacts me or answers any of my calls or emails. Brother and wife won't speak to me. Sent my niece a birthday present and heard nothing back (had no expectations but it's sad how generations of this disease repeats itself) and my mother didn't even call or se...
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WorkingThroughIt
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7
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393
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keeping the focus on my spiritual weel being.
(Preview)
Hi All, Now my focus is mostly on myself and I have done some steps work I see my ultimate goal is my spiritual awakening, if I am spirtually well everything else falls into place. The first three steps are needed throughour my day many people I love and care for do not have a higher power, they do not know th...
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Tracy
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2
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277
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What are your favorite workbooks?
(Preview)
Mine are The Life Recovery Series Christian Co-dependence Did not like: The Anger Workbook - It made me more angry. :)
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Tricia911
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3
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244
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help! husband relapsed after 15 years sobriety
(Preview)
hello everyone. i hope someone out there can shed some light. i have been married to my husband for 5 years. when i met him, i was just 1 year sober from alcohol, and he was 10 years sober from alcohol and drugs. we have a toddler son and my 16 year old daughter from another relationship. my husband suffers f...
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alice1
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10
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7439
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Resolutions, anyone? (hee hee!)
(Preview)
It's right around the corner.... A new year, a fresh start.... At least for us, if not for the A in our lives. This is my first year and holiday season with you all, and I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for the compassion and fellowship I've felt since Day One. You are some amazing people! This y...
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Raven Juniper
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7
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465
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It was tough this morning..!
(Preview)
I took today off. It was very hard to get up. I went as far as showering brushing my teeth and praying. My intentions was to go to work. I prayed for that strength.. But I had to sleep. I will be going to a face to Face meeting tonight. I say my serenity prayer. I do realize I can not control anything ever when It...
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Gaby
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5
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251
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Step 8
(Preview)
Step 8 has been posted to the Step Work Board Learn How The Twelve Steps Work.Please join us and share your thoughtshttp://stepwork.activeboard.com/t56034097/alanon-step-8/
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hotrod
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1
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691
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ABF's big decision.
(Preview)
ABF came home tonight in a great mood. "Now I know you might not believe this" he says. "But I've come to a big decision". He sounded very serious. I was all ears and actually a little bit worried. "As of midnight, on New Years Eve, I'm not going to drink or smoke anymore&qu...
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Melly1248
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16
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474
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Merry Christmas and Happy New Year
(Preview)
To all my friends at MIP, I hope 2014 is the best year ever.
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mercedes1959
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6
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201
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Might Actually be Getting It
(Preview)
I am very hopeful today, despite my life repeating the same pattern the usual weekend breakup with the A and other problems I seem to be stuck in. Cathy in AZ said to me last week that things would change when I started to change. So after doing alot of thinking and praying, today I am going to take the bull b...
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mm830
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9
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257
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REELING! Completely abandoned reality - is this common? Confused/Scared, really need some comfort
(Preview)
After having set up going to christmas with my family, a great weekend, lots of love and affection, then walking off right as im fixing dinner Sunday, my A calls me yesterday and asks me if Im sitting down. I say I am. He blind sides me - we cant be together anymore because he is a monster and a terrible pers...
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breamanic665
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16
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504
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All I Want For Christmas Is.........
(Preview)
Hi Everyone, I have been gone a Long time. I didn't realize how long until I read my messages. I am an only child and have been the parent to my parents for some time. This past year plus has been extra tough. My Father, my Hero, passed away 3 weeks ago. Two days before my birthday. Funeral two days af...
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Grace7
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7
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397
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Christmas cheer or not?
(Preview)
I have been having a bout w/ the fact that I don't have the feeling for the holiday that I wish I had. I have been listening to holiday music for about a month now. I even read that listening to the music is healthy. I know that I will change my tune after the weekend. I feel that time will change things. By the w...
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Hoot Nanny
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3
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184
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Tired of All the Pain!
(Preview)
I don't know how A Person Can Cram so Many Blessings & Nightmares into the Same Week, But I Have Managed it! The Disease of Addiction ALWAYS seems to Hit in my Family! It is An Endless Cycle that just Keeps on Coming! My Grandchildren are Heartbroken, and THEY had to lay witness to the Nightmare of the...
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Jozie
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4
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522
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Am I managing his behavior by my not drinking?
(Preview)
When AH and I met, it was at a bar. As many ppl in their 20's ish age group do, we started going out on dates ordering dinners and wine, drinking at home, going out to bars, drinking at friends parties, throwing our own parties, etc. Nothing too crazy but all get-togethers would involve booze. We did th...
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gingerfizz
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9
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395
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Guilting Dad
(Preview)
I'm hoping someone may have some es&h to offer concerning a child of a sober alcoholic trying to parent their parent. My abf and I have been encountering some controlling behaviors on his eldest daughter's part. I have done a very good job of staying out of it but wish there was a response that wou...
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tiredtonite
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6
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365
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wish it were a different day...
(Preview)
Yeah, I only have today. But, I wish it were a different day...I have no choice but live this one. It is winter solstice in North America today. I don't know exactly what day it is all over the world. I happen to be remembering the day my dad died...but only for a little while. I will move on to other things. L...
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Hoot Nanny
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7
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419
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Christmas party..
(Preview)
The night went well. A lot of my close friends know how I am feeling and what I am going through. I have such supportive people in my life.. I had fun and for a minute just put aside what I was going through. I'm up early and still no word. I say my serenity prayer and I know I am powerless and I know that my son had...
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Gaby
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12
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476
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hard time despite all christmas cheer
(Preview)
not sure where to begin or what to say. its been a rough week. im trying to get in the christmas spirit yetvi just cant. i ususlly love the lights and the anticipation of the gifts and all, but thus year i.just feel blah. my ah has been drinking more the past two weeks and really miserable. all we have done is...
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Theoceancalls
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7
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417
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When are you prepared?
(Preview)
I've seen posts of people saying they were not prepared to leave abusive, alcoholic or just alcoholic partners. I wanted to add my personal experience without telling folks to ditch their partners. There is a difference between being ready or capable of doing what is necessary or feel you may want t...
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pinkchip
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31
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600
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Help!!!!
(Preview)
how or what do i do to find my last post??ive lost it and i been flipping through all the pages and nothing,i cant find nothing,need help please if anybody here knows how to tell me how to get to my posts.ty looking up
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lookingup
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3
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249
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saddened
(Preview)
here I am back here shoulda and should stay here but I always allow life to get me off track.my a b/f is now renting a room from me we are just friends been working out though he works 7 days a week 12 hour days so that's ok too,he don't drink as much if any I can tell if he has drank anything I set my bounderies wit...
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lookingup
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3
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349
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Sunday night meeting topics tonight are boundaries, letting go of martyrdom and taking care of ourselves during the hol
(Preview)
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mercedes1959
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2
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181
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I'm Done...
(Preview)
That's what A said to me Thursday, plus some lather rinse repeat of the usual. I hung up, and haven't made any attempt to contact since. Yesterday I made a decision that this belongs to my HP to sort out now, not me. One thing I am struggling with is his mother invited us to Christmas with them, we have share...
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mm830
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8
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431
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Scared, trying to make sure I'm in HP's will
(Preview)
I'm still going along with plans to find a rental. It's harder than I thought, mainly because of the dog but also because I need to find something that I think will 'fit' us. I'm not looking for anything fancy but just something practical and it's amazing how expensive some rentals are! I'm feeling di...
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ilovedogs
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8
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385
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Triggers for the A in our life
(Preview)
I have started reading about what triggers an A to start drinking again once they have stopped for a period of time. Any insight on this? Thanks, Jenny
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Jen61
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9
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356
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just for today I'm okay
(Preview)
Its been a long time since I've been on this site a lot has happened. My husband has been in full relapse mode for many months. At first it was a lot if lies and disappearances. Then one day he was so drunk he beat me. I stayed after that incident and I was very depressed I only left house to go to work. This past...
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texasgal
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9
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493
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I found someone I can poor all my love into and actually fix.....
(Preview)
Myself! I now have a break off from school for one whole month and I am going to eat healthy and work out and just enjoy myself and my friends and life. There were not enough people to take a super accelerated class for the January term class I needed to stay in the nursing program next semester. I made peace...
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Breakingfree
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11
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295
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Been awhile.. hello
(Preview)
HI all! I have not been on in a few weeks. My home computer is about shot and it is hard at work at times. Things have been going really well and to be honest, I start reading posts and some of the negative or sad posts get me down when I am feeling happy. I still love it here and it still helps me a lot just need a...
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Iwantthingsback
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7
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322
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serenity
(Preview)
Hi everyone, the topic at our meeting today was serenity. An old timer was sitting next to me as I shared about the first convention I attended Still very busy in my head still very very ill no serenity. I was rushing around and this old timer took hold of my hand and said very calmly, quietly, Tracy you kn...
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Tracy
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4
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324
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Trying to Help out Boyfriend with Alcoholic Mother
(Preview)
My boyfriend's single mother was an alcoholic for the first 20 years of his life. She eventually went to AA and became sober for 10 years and for the past couple of years, she has started drinking again. She told him that she started drinking again after my boyfriend in a way vented his frustrations wit...
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brendastarr
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6
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241
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MIP Al-Anon Group Meeting Chairpersons and Message Board Monitors Needed.
(Preview)
Hi Everyone! Our online Al-Anon group holds scheduled meetings every day of the week. 9am Monday - Friday 10am Saturday & Sunday 9pm Monday - Saturday 7pm Sunday. We have three chairperson slots open at this time. We would like to get these filled by currently active Al-Anon members with a mini...
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John
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1
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429
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I have to fake it till I make it..
(Preview)
I have prayed and surrendered to where I can't help my son. I have heard nothing as of right now. I know he knows to call me even collect to tell me that he is ok. I know there are churches or homeless shelters he can go to.. But I have to think of my family I have to take care of especially my 8 year old daughters t...
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Gaby
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7
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476
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Counting my blessings!!
(Preview)
Lots is right in my world these past couple of days. I am choosing to believe that because I kept myself calm and quiet (with the exception of whinging on here a bit) and reminded myself that "this too shall pass", my world has righted itself quickly and I have attracted some good karma. So I'l...
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Melly1248
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9
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540
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Al-Anon has given me choices.
(Preview)
Hey everyone, My name is slogan_Jim and I am a grateful member of al-anon. My alcoholic father just called and said he wanted to take me out to dinner tonight. In theory that sounds great and should be a good time. He was sober and seems like he's been for a few days (he also called Thursday to say hi and was f...
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slogan_jim
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3
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228
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24 years ago today....
(Preview)
I surrendered to the process of recovery and started this amazing journey. Thank you for trudging the road of happy destiny with me. John
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John
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10
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398
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I have heard nothing and the guilt is in me..
(Preview)
My son has not gone back to the ranch.. Pastor now says he is not allowed back on the ranch. That he has consequences to deal with. He is out in a different state and I feel guilty. I am a mess. Yes I do attend ala-non meetings. I need to find me a new Sponser.. I have a lot of family and friends support.. But this...
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Gaby
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12
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452
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A lengthy update
(Preview)
Hi everyone! I have tried to write an update for days and I can't ever find enough time to do much. Working full time with 2 small children and taking are of life by myself has me running ragged! I continue to read and learn all of the information I can about codependency, being a wife of an alcoholic, and...
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HisMrsWright
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6
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341
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feeling frustrated and sad
(Preview)
Okay, So I was expecting to hang out with my husband tonight. He has had a very busy day today. He has been getting a couple of guys to do some work on our house?clean up the yard, fix some things. He also got them to go pick up a piano he bought for me at a thrift store. A super sweet gesture, really nice piano, $...
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sadsusie
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7
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481
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Some News
(Preview)
I was surprised to get an email from my son today after weeks of silence. He wrote that he's still living in the rooming house and desperately needs to move out as guys are overdosing on heroin and smoking crack. He says he's looking for work - he will take just about anything at this point. As a last resort...
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Rose50
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8
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415
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boundaries w son
(Preview)
Hi Everyone: It's been a while since I've posted but have gained so much ESH from reading all of your shares. I am upset tonight and having trouble getting past it. My oldest son (19) lives at home and is going to college locally. Mostly I love this. Tonight he asked to have some friends over. I said y...
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yanksfan51
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7
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429
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Oh my!!! He called about visiting me
(Preview)
I wasn't gonna post this, but reconsidered bc some new folks might get a benefit from this bc I want to show just how MUCH this programme has worked for me...AND journalling out my "stuff" helps me move on as well.....I spoke w/my sponsor about this and she was like "OMG, you would in th...
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neshema2
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7
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377
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He is gone again!!!
(Preview)
My son woke up and walked off the ranch this morning.. He maybe out there in the cold.. Hungry .. And looking for his next fix. He is 4 hours away from me.. I can't live like this no more.. I can't save him .. I'm not god.. But I'm scared for him. I'm sick to my stomach and truly trying to realize that I can't help...
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Gaby
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15
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499
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"No"
(Preview)
Aloha family..."No" is a complete sentence right? This time acting it out is better than verbalizing it because it was my Grand Daughter who I love to pieces who told me or was she asking hmmmm "you have to talk to dad (my eldest son who has relapsed)". Loving her permits me to...
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Jerry F
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13
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773
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My share on last nights meeting topics (expectations, Letting go of resentment, and acceptance)
(Preview)
I have been asked a few times if someone could have a copy of what I said in the meeting last night. I decided I would post it here, share it with everyone, and from here it can be copied by those who want to keep it for later reading. the topics were expectations, letting go of resentments, and acceptance...
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John
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14
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543
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Today..
(Preview)
I put in a face to face meeting last night. I clearly understand that I have to take it minute by minute. I clearly understand that I have no control of my son choices. He and I are 4 hours away and I can not rescue him because not only am I killing him but I'm killing me.. I wake up this morning with prayer. I am h...
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Gaby
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5
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411
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I need some esh..??
(Preview)
Most of you know my situation with my A son.. He is 4 hours away because he said he does not want to live the way he has been living. He asked for the help. I provided it again. Today I get a phone from the recovery ranch and said my son walked off the ranch. This was 4 pm. I about fainted. Mind you he is out in no whe...
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Gaby
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4
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285
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I'd say fast update ..
(Preview)
So never the case .. LOL .. . (Any references I make that seem offensive in terms of God or He .. .. this is the God of MY understanding, please feel free to insert the God of YOUR understanding into those statements as a whole I think they are universally true.) First off, big hugs to everyone who is strug...
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SerenityRUS
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5
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314
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What's under the slogans can be the same and feel the same...
(Preview)
One thing that's going on with me is that I'm realizing I'm still just as manipulative as always - I just know how to hide it under recovery slogans - sayings - and ideas. The things that I've 'learned' I'm just now using to still get what I want from people - and try to make them what I want them. What I have...
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Tasha
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4
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318
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I'm feeling relieved but upset
(Preview)
Good Morning my MIP family My X moved my son out yesterday and now is preparing for the arrival of him to his home. I asked my X if he needed the blow up bed for him and he said NO.....he will have a real bed in my home! OK I said. I'm relieved my son won't be homeless for Christmas but I'm upset that he will have...
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Cathyinaz
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11
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561
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Don't know if this is good or bad lol.
(Preview)
Tomorrow, daughter has her "end of year" party. I know, she just had a halloween party but the whole concept of "opening up our house" and actually inviting people over is sort of a symbolic step for me; I'm not going to hide in my home in shame and not let anyone in, nor let my daught...
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Melly1248
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8
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532
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Being let down
(Preview)
Trying really hard to keep to my side of the road. Had a good talk with AH Sunday, he told me he understood why I would be upset and he promises again to be more attentive to me, the kids and actively be there with us. He would quit choosing alcohol over us, spending time with friends over us. I reminded him Mo...
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Hope2000
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5
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478
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Update on my son...
(Preview)
So my son was MIA as most of you knew. Our neighbors found him out of gas in his car on the side of the freeway. Well my intentions was to take the car away which that did happen. My son came home and got his last fixed and asked to head back to recovery. He looked like death.. My husband said and agreed let's do t...
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Gaby
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6
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396
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She Crushed Me
(Preview)
This is my first post. I am so heartbroken. I have been dating and living with an alcoholic for the past 2.5 years. I never knew it would be so hard. I was ignorant to what it was like. The lies, the sneaking, the ruined holidays and dates. It was a mess. Lots of mistrust. I have 2 kids from a previous marriage...
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PatrickSean
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10
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443
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