Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Jorbax · Jorbax

I am not dealing with things very well today to be honest..........I am wondering what you guys think about this: I let my 58 yr old A. brother move in with us (thought he was at rock bottom & ready for change) He is here and has already lost a job nearby due to drinking/ fighting (he is a belligerent d...

ddub · ddub

When I was in denial, the rules kept changing based on whether AH was drunk or not. Trying to keep everything going smoothly was impossible because the rules changed. At the time, I had negative thoughts that I wasn't trying hard enough, I was just not smart enough or I always messed things up. The u...

Loupiness · Loupiness

I initially looked forward to posting about what I great day I had. I got off work early, stopped to make an appt for a haircut and was able to get one immediately, and then bought an outfit for a event I am going to this weekend. I even got a local discount, and my pants are being hemmed for free. While shoppi...

Tenderheartsks · Tenderheartsks

Several weeks ago my brother called me to see if I wanted his 'old' laptop as he was getting a new one. He has a sound studio at his home where he does radio commercials for businesses all over the country as a side business. He's also the creative director for TIC-FM in Hartford, CT, and also does the late a...

nmike · nmike

When do you know if you are really letting go? Or are you just stuffing it? I saw my Ahsober a few times this week. I have to prepare myself ahead of time because he comes, speaks to me about "the weather" type of things and then he is gone. I ask myself have I let go because I turn on my heel and walk h...

Jorbax · Jorbax

New to AlAnon....have only been to 2 f2f mtgs....but have called the lady I met several times in charge of the meeting whose # was given to me upon calling from the phonebook. I feel like I have called her too much. At the last mtg I apologized and she told me that I had only called her twice that week. Sh...

amybear · amybear

Hi all... Recovering from my surgery... literally feel like I was kicked in the gut, but I'm moving around a bit better and taking my time to heal - physically and emotionally... But tonight, I wanted to get some thoughts on dealing with your A when they realize you are trying to find serenity... and the...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I was thinking earlier about how significantly my life has changed since leaving the A. When I first left I had all this empty time and more importantly space in my mind and it left a HUGE gaping hole in my life when I moved out. I realize now that was because my whole life was about him and what HE was doing...

mum2leahnjosh · mum2leahnjosh

Hi everyone I am pleased to tell you all i worked up the courage to go to my first f2f meeting. Everyone was so nice to me, a little touchy feely for my liking as im not use to hugs, but guess its something i should get use to. Josh let out a huge burp whiched echoed around the church hall, was really funny. Feel...

Peggy7 · Peggy7

My husband brought me fresh cut lilacs and had coffee already made. The day was beautiful with sunshine and spring in the air. I called Mother and wished her a happy mother's day and asked her, if she could have done it all over again knowing what she does now or chosen to be a famous movie star instead wh...

Lanchas · Lanchas

I went to my first f2f Al-Anon meeting tonight. I cried off and on throughout it but I did speak - childlike though. I bought Courage to Change One Day at a Time in Al-Anon II. ESH would be appreciated. Lanchas

AlaMom · AlaMom

Then turn it over. Easier said than done at least for me anyways. Im ok with doing the legwork - but the turning over still gets me sometimes. I have a tendency to obsess a bit on things (something Im sure noone here is familiar with lol). Yesterday I got great news that we were approved for a loan for a n...

charr · charr

last night i went off on one of my ah friends, saying he was a bad influence on my husband and if things didn't change, i would make them change. when this guy or any of his friends come over it give him the right to drink and get away from me. He is saying i am the crazy one, i need help he wants to go to my therapy l...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

I GOT A JOB! I'm in the Americorp, in Louisville, KY! I start the last week of june. WooHoo! WhoopWhoop!

glad · glad

Okay I understand that we don't need to get our validation from other people, and I have hoped for just that all my life while continuing to choose men who are not communicative or very open emotionally. Husband of 15 years just didn't have it IQ wise. Current BF of 5 years is very smart, charming an...

Tracy · Tracy

My A has been in touch after nearly three weeks. I tried to understand he was ill while still trying to protect me. I have not allowed him back and have only seen him twice. I am aware he is trying to start the cycle agian promises that will not be kept, apologies that make me feel sorry for him. I care for h...

seekingserenity · seekingserenity

I was in an online alanon room and I saw the words Let Go and Let God, I'm grateful for that. Today has been one of those days when I have the instinct to force everything, or more to the point, force the people that I love and want to love me back so that I will feel better about myself. I have been doing this all...

maresie · maresie

The A who I was once with calls maybe once every six weeks. No matter what I do or say he keeps up the calls. In his law of averages he feels I am sure that eventually I'll break down and feel sorry for him or say something that will somehow engage him. My only recourse through all this has to be really diligen...

wildthang86 · wildthang86

I finally get up the courage to get my AH out of the house in hopes that I can find some peace. Now my 18 year old is trying to take over. He is in his last week of High school and has no idea where he wants to go to school and has no financial aide. He goes to school for a few hours in the morning and then goes to work f...

debilyn · debilyn

Geez we have the addicts having drug affected babies,out to adoption. addicts keeping their kids,no supervision,no mentors... And now we have a generation of "parents" who want to be FRIENDS with their kids and wonder why they are writing on walls, uncontrollable, rrrrrr Today I was wa...

Aloha · Aloha

My AH and I went to small claims court today for our hearing on getting our security deposit back from our previous land lord. No surprise, she didn't show up. We sat in the courtroom with AC set to "Arctic" for a good hour until we were called, and then the judge reads a letter from her requesti...

glad · glad

In a case where one has "given their power away" by letting someone push your buttons "big time" and when one realizes it way too late. Like 2 years later or so, what to do? Contacting the person to "take your power back" would seem like just giving them more power. Si...

maresie · maresie

I think I have always been highly reactive. I grew up in a house where it was a fight to survive. I learned to just react, over react, react. These days I am trying not to be that way and its pretty much a mental discipline. Sometimes I do better than others. I keep having to look at my part in it and generally...

shadow1 · shadow1

Mike You have a pm

glad · glad

My issues I feel I can't control but think maybe I should find a way to are?? It's not my cat. I don't really like or dislike her. The cat pan is always full of poop, I have to empty it. It makes the house stink! The cat has kittens like a million times a year, babies stay in our bedroom and make it stink!! If I wan...

Hello, I am a new member... · wildthang86

I just joined today. My AH was just removed from our home a week and half ago and for those of your familiar with that you know that a court hearing comes after that. I also requested that he not be allowed to see our children, one who is 18 and one who is 14. The AH got wind that I was filing for an Order of Protec...

omajoy · omajoy

Life keeps piling on me,it seems. Just got a call that my 88 year old Dad, newly widowed eight weeks ago, was taken to hospital this morning with weakness and vomiting. Now I sit waiting and worried about that. He is 1000 miles away and as it was with my mother, I am not nearby to provide anything to him....

seekingserenity · seekingserenity

my birthday was on Friday and Mothers Day is today and it has been a miserable weekend. Let's start with Friday. My home health aide didn't acknowledge my birthday the entire day and she had plenty of chances cause it was acknowledged all day by other people. Now, I've always thought that if you knew it w...

Loupiness · Loupiness

This is my weekend with the kids, but my AH asked if he could have the kids tonight so he could take them to his mom's house and cook her dinner for Mother's Day. No problem for me. Now I get to go to al-anon! Anyhow, I texted him a quick message this evening because I wanted the kids ready so he wouldn't hang ar...

amybear · amybear

Well... I just joined this forum last week and got some really great advice and words of encouragement... I just need to vent... Haven't had a chance yet to get to f2f meeting but found one close to home that also does an AA meeting, in case my A decides he wants to go... he just goes back and forth... i nee...

omajoy · omajoy

My mother's day was exactly as I imagined it last week when I posted. I was alone all day. No grandchild was here to see me; his mother saw to that, obviously expressing her anger with me from a phone call gone bad Friday morning. Said call to scream about my son to me and his neglect to do something she had...

paulaque · paulaque

Hello all, I joined before then lost my log in details. I was Paula Q before. Now get this-I searched for the topic I started as Paula Q to see if anyone else had replied since and I couldn't believe it when I saw the date it was posted-4 sept 2006!!! Nearly 2 years ago and I don't feel I've moved on at all. S...

debilyn · debilyn

I am sure many know or have heard of broken heart syndrome. You know, the mom who never gets over the loss of a child,or a husband who's wife dies etc Could face that this life will always be a struggle of working on keeping on.One foot in front of the other,giving it all to hp, having complete faith, being g...

cara33 · cara33

Hi everyone Quick history Son has been on opiates for over 2 years He is in rehab.... one week on Tuesday night He wanted to come home today, (after only 5 days) I told him if he came home he would not be coming here and that he needed more than 5 days. He eventually agreed to stay longer. I dont want t...

round3 · round3

As many of you know - my A and I are considering (planning?) to try again - which will mean his move back to the states. Back here to me. Everyone's got an opinion on that - and believe me - there's nothing that I haven't thought of. Nothing. All that being said - I'll get to my point. Last night we were onl...

CJ098 · CJ098

Hi everyone, I asked my AH to move out and he did last Saturday. It's been stress free for a week, and I'm a lot happier, but also somewhat confused because I'm sad but happy at the same time. I also still worry about him, but I know in my heart he and I will be fine and go on our separate paths. We have no chil...

bev · bev

my so called SAH slipped twice.first time was in march while i was up in ny for the birth of my 3rd grandbaby,he drugged and drank over 3000.00$while i was gone for 18 days.the second time was just 2 weeks ago when i went back up to ny to move my daughter and son in law and 3 grandbabies back here to florida{th...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Thanks to those who responded to my post. I had an OK day with my mom. We went to lunch and I treated her. She seemed to have a pretty nice day! I struggled as usual but made it through. A lady at the checkout at the grocery store wished me a happy MD but I said nothing. I was waiting for something to happen y...

meagain · meagain

I have been devorced 27 yrs and my ExA is still causing problem between me and my 3 adult sons. Does it ever help tp just phone him and really tell him off!! My DH said that will make things soooo much worse. I want to "blackmail" him and say stay out of my life with my sons or I will tell them about a...

Suzannah · Suzannah

...when it comes to moving on in the steps, I realise that there is alot of stuff that I have now dealt with and brought to the fore in my inventory, however I have come across a bit of a stumbling block when it comes to putting Step 5 into practice with one or two people. If I cannot put things right with the pe...

JohnL · JohnL

Hello all....I'm brand new to this site. My brother, age 51, has been in the hospital for almost three weeks now. We were worried when we couldn't contact him and had a friend of his go by my brother's apartment. They gained entry and found him on the floor completely delusional. He was immediately tak...

ddub · ddub

"What greater treasures can you have than faith and courage and love? All these are stolen from you by doubt and fear and resentment. Face each day with peace and hope." Today I want to be more active, do the first thing first, eat 3 meals Read some al anon literature but not over study or dwell...

z28mama8 · z28mama8

Hi I'm new to this site, and I need some help maybe guideness or something. ok lets start way back in the day, my mother was a server alcoholic and at the age of 10 I moved with my father because her drinking would cause her to become mean and just unruly. any way I stayed here in Illinois and my mom moved to Mi...

barbie · barbie

My husband and I started a drug and alcohol prevention program at our church check out the pledge that the young people made to not use drugs or alcohol. I am so very proud of them. We followed up the video shoot weekly 1 hour meetings with the young people to discuss drugs, peer pressure and anything els...

cookie1971 · cookie1971

(((((Family)))) A very Happy Mothers day to all the mothers out there. Whether you are a mother to children or pets or both like I am. May you all have a blessed Mothers Day!! Love, Claudia

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am still struggling with MD! I am not very happy this time of year anymore! I have two mothers to celebrate with and not myself. I have never had children and regret it very much. I have wanted children but know that I shouldn't. It is a very tough decision I had to make, too. I will make it through, I k...

ddub · ddub

"More than we can imagine, good days are ours for the asking." I have been frustrated with stressed kids over failing grades and missing school, but today they are camping with scouts so all three of us can have a break from the pressure. My sleep has been poor and many naps to be rested for the...

norwood · norwood

Spiritual growth takes place within us, and it needs an environment completely free of any ill will.

krazykatlady · krazykatlady

I'm new here and new to any addiction board. I'm here to get some advice on dealing with my brother. My brother is 33 and is an alcoholic in denial. We haven't actually had a major talk about his drinking but I'm wondering if we should. He actually wrecked his truck on Jan. 5 of this year and thank God he didn...

RLC · RLC

Hello Everyone, I was a member of MIP for 3 wks . Last week I changed my name because my full name appeared on my post. With the help of jerry F, and David62 I was able to get that corrected. And, thanks again to Jerry,and David for helping. Anyway, that is not what I wanted to talk about today. I went to our g...

Suzannah · Suzannah

Hello Family I just spent the bank holiday weekend with my daughter and her family, and don't get me wrong it was one of the best times I have ever spent with her and the children. I give thanks for that, it was a first. Now I am back home, and I have been to my weekly hospital PMP session and I am so tired and low...

Jorbax · Jorbax

I wrote about my AB moving in w/ us at assumed rock bottom and messing up again. I wrote letter to him w no response. He will not talk about anything. I went to my 2nd AlAnon f2f mtg tonight. I realize that I am to focus on me and live for today only. But this will take much practice for me. I cannot help bu...

Tiger2006 · Tiger2006

Today's thought from Hazelden is: Daily, we determine our priorities. Priorities are not merely something we establish once a year, once a month, or even once a week. Our priorities are visible in the myriad decisions we make and actions we take each day. Being closely in touch with our inner selves a...

glad · glad

Someone else's post made me think... My birthday is next week. He has ignored everyone for the past 5 years. So I'm gonna just not worry about what he does or does not do this year. I'm gonna plan a little bitty party for myself, complete with a cake of my choice,(kinda cool to get to pick my own flavor??n...

ditto · ditto

I was chatting with a man last night. He wants me to date him. He sent me the following eMail regarding a conversation we had last night: "Ah, yes, I remember. Sometimes I get fuzzy around evening conversations after long days and a glass of wine or two." Ok, you guys know that I am very conce...

still searching · still searching

Well, I found out the other day that my AH is drinking before he goes to work, he is a cop. I admitted it to me, saying it was stupid to do. I told him he needs to get help, that this is just totally out of control. He has been off the last 2 days and now he is just acting like nothing happened or was said. It's the sa...

cara33 · cara33

Hi everyone.. I am not new to addiction forums I have been chatting with various people over the last few months when I finally came 'out' of denial and realized my son was an addict. I am here today to get to know some of you because I know I will need to know all there is to know about his stay in rehab, his ret...

glad · glad

I keep reading things here that remind me that my situation is not unique. I am so thankful for all of you here. And the opportunity to ask for your ideas. From your experiences what is up with the "A" when you write him a heartfelt letter regarding issues and he ignores it. I mean obviously he i...

omajoy · omajoy

I hope all mothers among you will have a wonderful day Sunday. I have dreaded Mother's Day Sunday for weeks....just as I dread almost all holidays for the past couple of years. When your family falls apart, any holiday is fraught with sadness and I just want them OVER!!! I helped the grandbaby make...

maresie · maresie

A year ago I was devasted that the A could respond to me with contempt on my birthday. I had no idea that one year later I could detach from that kind of venom or that I could consider living without him or obsessing about him 24/7. I am trying to look on that as a "present". Indeed I am trying t...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	I need help/advice AND online sponsor (Preview) I am not dealing with things very well today to be honest..........I am wondering what you guys think about this: I let my 58 yr old A. brother move in with us (thought he was at rock bottom & ready for change) He is here and has already lost a job nearby due to drinking/ fighting (he is a belligerent d...	Jorbax	2	1277	May 16, 2008 by maresie
	Rejoice? (Preview) When I was in denial, the rules kept changing based on whether AH was drunk or not. Trying to keep everything going smoothly was impossible because the rules changed. At the time, I had negative thoughts that I wasn't trying hard enough, I was just not smart enough or I always messed things up. The u...	ddub	1	302	May 16, 2008 by nmike
	from good to bad (Preview) I initially looked forward to posting about what I great day I had. I got off work early, stopped to make an appt for a haircut and was able to get one immediately, and then bought an outfit for a event I am going to this weekend. I even got a local discount, and my pants are being hemmed for free. While shoppi...	Loupiness	3	387	May 16, 2008 by Jean4444
	I have the best brother in the world! (Preview) Several weeks ago my brother called me to see if I wanted his 'old' laptop as he was getting a new one. He has a sound studio at his home where he does radio commercials for businesses all over the country as a side business. He's also the creative director for TIC-FM in Hartford, CT, and also does the late a...	Tenderheartsks	5	908	May 16, 2008 by lmw
	Is this letting go? (Preview) When do you know if you are really letting go? Or are you just stuffing it? I saw my Ahsober a few times this week. I have to prepare myself ahead of time because he comes, speaks to me about "the weather" type of things and then he is gone. I ask myself have I let go because I turn on my heel and walk h...	nmike	1	592	May 15, 2008 by Jerry F
	? re: Sponsor (Preview) New to AlAnon....have only been to 2 f2f mtgs....but have called the lady I met several times in charge of the meeting whose # was given to me upon calling from the phonebook. I feel like I have called her too much. At the last mtg I apologized and she told me that I had only called her twice that week. Sh...	Jorbax	6	532	May 15, 2008 by nmike
	I'm NOT an A ... why do YOU need Al-anon??? (Preview) Hi all... Recovering from my surgery... literally feel like I was kicked in the gut, but I'm moving around a bit better and taking my time to heal - physically and emotionally... But tonight, I wanted to get some thoughts on dealing with your A when they realize you are trying to find serenity... and the...	amybear	12	674	May 15, 2008 by wp
	From too much to not enough! (Preview) I was thinking earlier about how significantly my life has changed since leaving the A. When I first left I had all this empty time and more importantly space in my mind and it left a HUGE gaping hole in my life when I moved out. I realize now that was because my whole life was about him and what HE was doing...	carolinagirl	7	562	May 15, 2008 by maresie
	First f2f alanon meeting (Preview) Hi everyone I am pleased to tell you all i worked up the courage to go to my first f2f meeting. Everyone was so nice to me, a little touchy feely for my liking as im not use to hugs, but guess its something i should get use to. Josh let out a huge burp whiched echoed around the church hall, was really funny. Feel...	mum2leahnjosh	7	325	May 15, 2008 by serendipity
	It Happened On Mother's Day (Preview) My husband brought me fresh cut lilacs and had coffee already made. The day was beautiful with sunshine and spring in the air. I called Mother and wished her a happy mother's day and asked her, if she could have done it all over again knowing what she does now or chosen to be a famous movie star instead wh...	Peggy7	11	874	May 14, 2008 by Maria123
	f2f meetings (Preview) I went to my first f2f Al-Anon meeting tonight. I cried off and on throughout it but I did speak - childlike though. I bought Courage to Change One Day at a Time in Al-Anon II. ESH would be appreciated. Lanchas	Lanchas	8	409	May 14, 2008 by Maria123
	Just Do the Legwork (Preview) Then turn it over. Easier said than done at least for me anyways. Im ok with doing the legwork - but the turning over still gets me sometimes. I have a tendency to obsess a bit on things (something Im sure noone here is familiar with lol). Yesterday I got great news that we were approved for a loan for a n...	AlaMom	2	336	May 14, 2008 by Maria123
	i did a bad thing? (Preview) last night i went off on one of my ah friends, saying he was a bad influence on my husband and if things didn't change, i would make them change. when this guy or any of his friends come over it give him the right to drink and get away from me. He is saying i am the crazy one, i need help he wants to go to my therapy l...	charr	10	521	May 14, 2008 by cookie1971
	Louisville, here I come! (Preview) I GOT A JOB! I'm in the Americorp, in Louisville, KY! I start the last week of june. WooHoo! WhoopWhoop!	Tiger2006	6	376	May 14, 2008 by cookie1971
	Mouse in little box again...ughh!! (Preview) Okay I understand that we don't need to get our validation from other people, and I have hoped for just that all my life while continuing to choose men who are not communicative or very open emotionally. Husband of 15 years just didn't have it IQ wise. Current BF of 5 years is very smart, charming an...	glad	4	636	May 14, 2008 by lin0606
	slips progress not perfection (Preview) My A has been in touch after nearly three weeks. I tried to understand he was ill while still trying to protect me. I have not allowed him back and have only seen him twice. I am aware he is trying to start the cycle agian promises that will not be kept, apologies that make me feel sorry for him. I care for h...	Tracy	5	513	May 14, 2008 by wildthang86
	Let Go and Let God (Preview) I was in an online alanon room and I saw the words Let Go and Let God, I'm grateful for that. Today has been one of those days when I have the instinct to force everything, or more to the point, force the people that I love and want to love me back so that I will feel better about myself. I have been doing this all...	seekingserenity	1	412	May 14, 2008 by maresie
	Giving away all my power to the A. (Preview) The A who I was once with calls maybe once every six weeks. No matter what I do or say he keeps up the calls. In his law of averages he feels I am sure that eventually I'll break down and feel sorry for him or say something that will somehow engage him. My only recourse through all this has to be really diligen...	maresie	2	440	May 14, 2008 by maresie
	AH out of the house and oldest son trying to take over (Preview) I finally get up the courage to get my AH out of the house in hopes that I can find some peace. Now my 18 year old is trying to take over. He is in his last week of High school and has no idea where he wants to go to school and has no financial aide. He goes to school for a few hours in the morning and then goes to work f...	wildthang86	8	445	May 14, 2008 by paulaque
	gads what is the child rearing world coming too???/ (Preview) Geez we have the addicts having drug affected babies,out to adoption. addicts keeping their kids,no supervision,no mentors... And now we have a generation of "parents" who want to be FRIENDS with their kids and wonder why they are writing on walls, uncontrollable, rrrrrr Today I was wa...	debilyn	4	601	May 14, 2008 by debilyn
	So court will be dragged on (Preview) My AH and I went to small claims court today for our hearing on getting our security deposit back from our previous land lord. No surprise, she didn't show up. We sat in the courtroom with AC set to "Arctic" for a good hour until we were called, and then the judge reads a letter from her requesti...	Aloha	1	335	May 14, 2008 by maresie
	Question on giving power away? (Preview) In a case where one has "given their power away" by letting someone push your buttons "big time" and when one realizes it way too late. Like 2 years later or so, what to do? Contacting the person to "take your power back" would seem like just giving them more power. Si...	glad	8	818	May 14, 2008 by canadianguy
	on not being reactive (Preview) I think I have always been highly reactive. I grew up in a house where it was a fight to survive. I learned to just react, over react, react. These days I am trying not to be that way and its pretty much a mental discipline. Sometimes I do better than others. I keep having to look at my part in it and generally...	maresie	1	327	May 14, 2008 by nmike
	Mike1106 check your pm (Preview) Mike You have a pm	shadow1	0	277	May 14, 2008 by shadow1
	Things I can control or things I can't?? (Preview) My issues I feel I can't control but think maybe I should find a way to are?? It's not my cat. I don't really like or dislike her. The cat pan is always full of poop, I have to empty it. It makes the house stink! The cat has kittens like a million times a year, babies stay in our bedroom and make it stink!! If I wan...	glad	3	603	May 14, 2008 by Peggy7
	Hello, I am a new member... (Preview) I just joined today. My AH was just removed from our home a week and half ago and for those of your familiar with that you know that a court hearing comes after that. I also requested that he not be allowed to see our children, one who is 18 and one who is 14. The AH got wind that I was filing for an Order of Protec...	wildthang86	8	655	May 14, 2008 by Peggy7
	news to cope with (Preview) Life keeps piling on me,it seems. Just got a call that my 88 year old Dad, newly widowed eight weeks ago, was taken to hospital this morning with weakness and vomiting. Now I sit waiting and worried about that. He is 1000 miles away and as it was with my mother, I am not nearby to provide anything to him....	omajoy	6	374	May 14, 2008 by Aloha
	explosion (Preview) my birthday was on Friday and Mothers Day is today and it has been a miserable weekend. Let's start with Friday. My home health aide didn't acknowledge my birthday the entire day and she had plenty of chances cause it was acknowledged all day by other people. Now, I've always thought that if you knew it w...	seekingserenity	4	346	May 13, 2008 by maresie
	Busted! (Preview) This is my weekend with the kids, but my AH asked if he could have the kids tonight so he could take them to his mom's house and cook her dinner for Mother's Day. No problem for me. Now I get to go to al-anon! Anyhow, I texted him a quick message this evening because I wanted the kids ready so he wouldn't hang ar...	Loupiness	10	515	May 13, 2008 by maresie
	rough night... (Preview) Well... I just joined this forum last week and got some really great advice and words of encouragement... I just need to vent... Haven't had a chance yet to get to f2f meeting but found one close to home that also does an AA meeting, in case my A decides he wants to go... he just goes back and forth... i nee...	amybear	8	583	May 13, 2008 by amybear
	imagine it and it WILL come to pass (Preview) My mother's day was exactly as I imagined it last week when I posted. I was alone all day. No grandchild was here to see me; his mother saw to that, obviously expressing her anger with me from a phone call gone bad Friday morning. Said call to scream about my son to me and his neglect to do something she had...	omajoy	6	568	May 13, 2008 by carolinagirl
	What is WRONG with me? (Preview) Hello all, I joined before then lost my log in details. I was Paula Q before. Now get this-I searched for the topic I started as Paula Q to see if anyone else had replied since and I couldn't believe it when I saw the date it was posted-4 sept 2006!!! Nearly 2 years ago and I don't feel I've moved on at all. S...	paulaque	12	708	May 13, 2008 by paulaque
	Pondering how the heck I got here (Preview) I am sure many know or have heard of broken heart syndrome. You know, the mom who never gets over the loss of a child,or a husband who's wife dies etc Could face that this life will always be a struggle of working on keeping on.One foot in front of the other,giving it all to hp, having complete faith, being g...	debilyn	6	706	May 13, 2008 by debilyn
	need advice quickly (Preview) Hi everyone Quick history Son has been on opiates for over 2 years He is in rehab.... one week on Tuesday night He wanted to come home today, (after only 5 days) I told him if he came home he would not be coming here and that he needed more than 5 days. He eventually agreed to stay longer. I dont want t...	cara33	6	463	May 13, 2008 by Christy
	A question of emotions (Preview) As many of you know - my A and I are considering (planning?) to try again - which will mean his move back to the states. Back here to me. Everyone's got an opinion on that - and believe me - there's nothing that I haven't thought of. Nothing. All that being said - I'll get to my point. Last night we were onl...	round3	5	695	May 12, 2008 by Jerry F
	MY AH moved out (Preview) Hi everyone, I asked my AH to move out and he did last Saturday. It's been stress free for a week, and I'm a lot happier, but also somewhat confused because I'm sad but happy at the same time. I also still worry about him, but I know in my heart he and I will be fine and go on our separate paths. We have no chil...	CJ098	4	528	May 12, 2008 by glad
	well he slipped (Preview) my so called SAH slipped twice.first time was in march while i was up in ny for the birth of my 3rd grandbaby,he drugged and drank over 3000.00$while i was gone for 18 days.the second time was just 2 weeks ago when i went back up to ny to move my daughter and son in law and 3 grandbabies back here to florida{th...	bev	4	549	May 12, 2008 by maresie
	Thanks (Preview) Thanks to those who responded to my post. I had an OK day with my mom. We went to lunch and I treated her. She seemed to have a pretty nice day! I struggled as usual but made it through. A lady at the checkout at the grocery store wished me a happy MD but I said nothing. I was waiting for something to happen y...	Hoot Nanny	1	345	May 12, 2008 by glad
	need advice asap! (Preview) I have been devorced 27 yrs and my ExA is still causing problem between me and my 3 adult sons. Does it ever help tp just phone him and really tell him off!! My DH said that will make things soooo much worse. I want to "blackmail" him and say stay out of my life with my sons or I will tell them about a...	meagain	10	500	May 12, 2008 by debilyn
	How do I deal with... (Preview) ...when it comes to moving on in the steps, I realise that there is alot of stuff that I have now dealt with and brought to the fore in my inventory, however I have come across a bit of a stumbling block when it comes to putting Step 5 into practice with one or two people. If I cannot put things right with the pe...	Suzannah	4	611	May 12, 2008 by maresie
	My brother is in the hospital (Preview) Hello all....I'm brand new to this site. My brother, age 51, has been in the hospital for almost three weeks now. We were worried when we couldn't contact him and had a friend of his go by my brother's apartment. They gained entry and found him on the floor completely delusional. He was immediately tak...	JohnL	10	805	May 12, 2008 by JohnL
	faith, courage & love (Preview) "What greater treasures can you have than faith and courage and love? All these are stolen from you by doubt and fear and resentment. Face each day with peace and hope." Today I want to be more active, do the first thing first, eat 3 meals Read some al anon literature but not over study or dwell...	ddub	1	348	May 12, 2008 by Loupiness
	what to do (Preview) Hi I'm new to this site, and I need some help maybe guideness or something. ok lets start way back in the day, my mother was a server alcoholic and at the age of 10 I moved with my father because her drinking would cause her to become mean and just unruly. any way I stayed here in Illinois and my mom moved to Mi...	z28mama8	7	455	May 12, 2008 by z28mama8
	Young People Taking a Pledge Not to use Drugs or Alcohol (Preview) My husband and I started a drug and alcohol prevention program at our church check out the pledge that the young people made to not use drugs or alcohol. I am so very proud of them. We followed up the video shoot weekly 1 hour meetings with the young people to discuss drugs, peer pressure and anything els...	barbie	4	630	May 12, 2008 by barbie
	HAPPY MOTHERS DAY!! (Preview) (((((Family)))) A very Happy Mothers day to all the mothers out there. Whether you are a mother to children or pets or both like I am. May you all have a blessed Mothers Day!! Love, Claudia	cookie1971	2	285	May 11, 2008 by Maria123
	Another Mother's Day! (Preview) I am still struggling with MD! I am not very happy this time of year anymore! I have two mothers to celebrate with and not myself. I have never had children and regret it very much. I have wanted children but know that I shouldn't. It is a very tough decision I had to make, too. I will make it through, I k...	Hoot Nanny	3	438	May 11, 2008 by round3
	A new way, a new day, a good day (Preview) "More than we can imagine, good days are ours for the asking." I have been frustrated with stressed kids over failing grades and missing school, but today they are camping with scouts so all three of us can have a break from the pressure. My sleep has been poor and many naps to be rested for the...	ddub	5	722	May 11, 2008 by Tracy
	My newest favorite quote to live by about letting go of anger and resentment (Preview) Spiritual growth takes place within us, and it needs an environment completely free of any ill will.	norwood	2	572	May 11, 2008 by Jerry F
	New- talk to my brother? (Preview) I'm new here and new to any addiction board. I'm here to get some advice on dealing with my brother. My brother is 33 and is an alcoholic in denial. We haven't actually had a major talk about his drinking but I'm wondering if we should. He actually wrecked his truck on Jan. 5 of this year and thank God he didn...	krazykatlady	2	471	May 11, 2008 by Jerry F
	I was reminded of the horrible disease again today!! (Preview) Hello Everyone, I was a member of MIP for 3 wks . Last week I changed my name because my full name appeared on my post. With the help of jerry F, and David62 I was able to get that corrected. And, thanks again to Jerry,and David for helping. Anyway, that is not what I wanted to talk about today. I went to our g...	RLC	1	539	May 10, 2008 by cookie1971
	Depression - I hate it! Really low! (Preview) Hello Family I just spent the bank holiday weekend with my daughter and her family, and don't get me wrong it was one of the best times I have ever spent with her and the children. I give thanks for that, it was a first. Now I am back home, and I have been to my weekly hospital PMP session and I am so tired and low...	Suzannah	7	608	May 10, 2008 by serendipity
	What do i do now?............... (Preview) I wrote about my AB moving in w/ us at assumed rock bottom and messing up again. I wrote letter to him w no response. He will not talk about anything. I went to my 2nd AlAnon f2f mtg tonight. I realize that I am to focus on me and live for today only. But this will take much practice for me. I cannot help bu...	Jorbax	5	781	May 10, 2008 by Jerry F
	Priorities (Preview) Today's thought from Hazelden is: Daily, we determine our priorities. Priorities are not merely something we establish once a year, once a month, or even once a week. Our priorities are visible in the myriad decisions we make and actions we take each day. Being closely in touch with our inner selves a...	Tiger2006	4	341	May 10, 2008 by ddub
	Birthdays! (Preview) Someone else's post made me think... My birthday is next week. He has ignored everyone for the past 5 years. So I'm gonna just not worry about what he does or does not do this year. I'm gonna plan a little bitty party for myself, complete with a cake of my choice,(kinda cool to get to pick my own flavor??n...	glad	3	338	May 10, 2008 by cookie1971
	Is This A Huge Clue? (Preview) I was chatting with a man last night. He wants me to date him. He sent me the following eMail regarding a conversation we had last night: "Ah, yes, I remember. Sometimes I get fuzzy around evening conversations after long days and a glass of wine or two." Ok, you guys know that I am very conce...	ditto	9	729	May 10, 2008 by arty
	drinking and work (Preview) Well, I found out the other day that my AH is drinking before he goes to work, he is a cop. I admitted it to me, saying it was stupid to do. I told him he needs to get help, that this is just totally out of control. He has been off the last 2 days and now he is just acting like nothing happened or was said. It's the sa...	still searching	3	434	May 9, 2008 by Jerry F
	son leaving for rehab @ 1:30 today (Preview) Hi everyone.. I am not new to addiction forums I have been chatting with various people over the last few months when I finally came 'out' of denial and realized my son was an addict. I am here today to get to know some of you because I know I will need to know all there is to know about his stay in rehab, his ret...	cara33	10	670	May 9, 2008 by cara33
	Letters to your "A"? (Preview) I keep reading things here that remind me that my situation is not unique. I am so thankful for all of you here. And the opportunity to ask for your ideas. From your experiences what is up with the "A" when you write him a heartfelt letter regarding issues and he ignores it. I mean obviously he i...	glad	9	691	May 9, 2008 by Jorbax
	cannot bear holidays (Preview) I hope all mothers among you will have a wonderful day Sunday. I have dreaded Mother's Day Sunday for weeks....just as I dread almost all holidays for the past couple of years. When your family falls apart, any holiday is fraught with sadness and I just want them OVER!!! I helped the grandbaby make...	omajoy	7	450	May 9, 2008 by Jill
	Birthday tomorrow (Preview) A year ago I was devasted that the A could respond to me with contempt on my birthday. I had no idea that one year later I could detach from that kind of venom or that I could consider living without him or obsessing about him 24/7. I am trying to look on that as a "present". Indeed I am trying t...	maresie	8	466	May 9, 2008 by Tracy
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.