Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Overcome · Overcome

It's been just two and a half weeks since the divorce and I am losing it! I am not able to concentrate on anything and I am not motivated to do anything. I have company coming this weekend and I just can't get myself in gear to clean house, do laundry, fix meals, just the everyday things that must be done. I ha...

N8SMOM · N8SMOM

Over 2 weeks ago my husband got suspended from work for refusing to take a drug/alcohol test. He told me that his company offered to let him keep his job if he enters a drug/alcohol program that lasts 5 years. It's the same program that the Board of Pharmacy uses and he'll probably have to enter it anyway...

Sincerely · Sincerely

Hello and Hugs Everyone! Tomorrow will be two weeks since my husband moved out. HURRAY! Today is day two of his at home detox. He called me a few times and tried to use me as a punching bag, but guess what....he missed...he never landed those punches...i'm too quick you see...i saw them coming and i go...

MooglesPunk · MooglesPunk

Since I started attending meetings, I have noticed that I have had massive emotional outpourings. I remember the night after my very first meeting and sharing, I was talking online to my partner (long distance relationships, different countries - we met for 3 weeks in July and it was truly fantastic...

Katy · Katy

Change to the fearful, chage is threatening, because it might mean that things may get worse, to the hopeful change is encouraging beacause things might get better, to the confident change is inspiring, because the challenge exists to make things better. katy x

christinajeanne · christinajeanne

today was a hectic day and I'm exhausted but it was not as bad as I thought it would be. I made it through the day unscathed and not abused by my aunt. I actually told her I was in school because I thought I want to tell people what's going on and maybe she will also get the message I'm getting ready to move on. I'...

angelchar375 · angelchar375

Reading the passage this morning in Courage to Change for Aug 4th, I am reminded that through my self care, I am slowly finding my self worth. Part of my self care has been my dedication to touch base with my program daily! I made this dedication only a few months back and already I see a huge change within m...

christinajeanne · christinajeanne

I have been very hard on myself lately. I've also been isolating. I haven't really been connecting with people. I do find myself getting lonely. I'm fed up with my ABF because he still defends a girl that tried to break us up and said such cruel hurtful things to me and threatened me. I try to explain my fee...

Jennifer · Jennifer

OK Rita's wish of magic wands and combat boots sure brought something to the day! I love the saying in that card, and am thinking I could really get into the thought of visualising a sparkly pink tutu'd combat booted guardian angel, fairy or whatever she or well ... he wants to be. On to the stuff I really d...

Hawk120025 · Hawk120025

Woops said something in Jennifers thread that really spoke to me. You mention that by talking about your past with A's it opens the doors to new A's. #1 - you tell them you date A's #2 - I'm an A so I need to hide it. Wow! That's exactly what my exabf had to think. I didn't give him all the details of my lif...

anonymiss · anonymiss

I can thank Al-Anon for giving me the courage and the tools to let my son get himself clean. He recently married and things are going well. His business status was such that while he was using, he managed not to lose everything. His credit suffered as he was late on making payments at time but somehow...

smartkat · smartkat

My mother and I provide babysitting for my brothers family. My sister-in-law never lifts a finger to clean anything. She seldom even fixes food for the kids. My mom struggles to know when to step in and help the kids by cleaning and trying to get a meal together or if that is enabling the mother to abdicat...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Yesterday I embarked on a 90 day journey of self improvement. I have decided to do this to get on with my life and let go of my ex boyfriend. I am not smoking, drinking, eating carbs or seeking a relationship/sex for the next 90 days. Plus exercising every day. I'm hoping to lose 45lbs in 90 days. I am r...

kitty · kitty

This is from my share today and I was encouraged to share this with others, so Im doing just that. not feeling too prolific but i'll give it a go ;) i was very hopless for so long i was seeing & obsessing on the situations of others and ignoring my own i suffered a lot of pain & anguish mental anxi...

debilyn · debilyn

Today I choose to not eat sugar. I may have fruit, and real 100% fruit juice. sigh, I have to. So keep doing the one day at a time, give it to hp. And put down those things I naturally grab to buy. The first step goes thru my head and it is true. Have craved it all my life. Doc just ok'ed me a gluco meter from this co...

MyThoughts2U2 · MyThoughts2U2

I am grateful that my step mother shared the wonderful world of Alanon with me. It is times like this that I feel often directionless, stressed, and pressured to be perfect. I have to make the "right choice." I am blessed with the opportunity to be able to seek new employment and have several...

debilyn · debilyn

So what are you up to and how are you feeling girl? I keep thinking of you and depression. It is such a hard disease and most feel it in their lives. Grief, different losses, all kinds of things, then for some reason our body cannot get back into that balance of the normal chemicals. That commercial on tv is...

chris52 · chris52

Hi. It's been ages since I posted. ( Sorry) You've no idea how many times I have posted,and lost it,or got an error message. But I really wanted to let you all know that really,this Alanon programme is just fantastic. A brief recap on my situation............for those that don't know me. I am English,b...

Jennifer · Jennifer

I'm sad. I'm awake in the time I should be sleeping. I don't want to share which means I probably should and I don't know where to start and I really don't want to start the whole eyes leaking big fat tears and not being able to breathe properly so I am not going to. I want this whole new ABF situation clear...

maresie · maresie

I was in a therapy group for 9 weeks. I had really hoped after the group that someone would call or email from the list we circulated. Noone has. I really don't want to be the person who organizes this because I have a great deal on my plate as it is. I feel like I am always the one who gives and I have had to t...

MaryPoppins · MaryPoppins

Hello Dear Friends, Lately, as I relfect on my growth in the program, I feel I am ready to face some problems that I have always encounted in alanon, and feel the need to try and find some clarity in these matters. Alanon has saved my life, in more ways than one, so this post is NOT about the merit of Alanon, o...

Jozie · Jozie

Well today was a very slow progress of a day, I did manage to do 3 loads of laundry even tho I have been feeling terrible... I don't know if it was something I ate or what but I have been having belly problems all evenning last night, and most of the day today... After such a wonderful weekend, it was kind of a b...

debhud · debhud

my dh is alcoholic and also uses prescription drugs when he can get them. he is by all standards successful. owns his own business, is respected in the communitity. we live well. he pays all of the bills and i spend my paycheck the way i want. (usually on the kids or grandkids) he is never mean when h...

Lilly Burn · Lilly Burn

I have been on this forum for 7 months and it has helped me so much. but i feel quilty because i dont help others very much at least not recently..im in a different place to the one where i fel like there was no way out, wanted to die, couldnt believe it...trouble is I still cant believe it and it has for some re...

need lots of help · need lots of help

he was extremely intoxicated. He snapped and started to hit me. he punched me in the chest and he twisted my arms. thankfully, another couple was here and the guy was able to get him off of me. AH then went to bed. after 10 min or so, i went to check on him with my friend. he was unconscious, his body was...

Sincerely · Sincerely

Hello Everyone! After many days of fussing and fighting and saying i wanted to move out and so on..i just had enough. Last Friday night, I begged him to leave. I called a friend of his and told him that I am serious and I needed his help. I needed a witness to what I was about to tell him, cause he (my A) thou...

TF · TF

I have heard alot lately about the book getting them sober by toby rice. i was just wondering if this book is a good read for families of recovery alcoholics or if it focuses on the active alcoholic. any feedback would be greatly appreciated. Tara

Tracy · Tracy

I have notice a lot lately how I react to what ever environment I am in or what people I am surrounded by. My boss talks about others, critising, judging I dont want to hear it but I am trying to be polite and I feel obliged to engage in the conversation. I always try and get her to see that other persons good p...

debilyn · debilyn

I am overwhelmed with all the people who took time to read my "lost" post. Also to all the ones who responded. I was so afraid my integrity was ruined but you all showed me the truth. It has been a HUGE lesson! thank you! Next time someone attacks my person, as we know in this world it happens too m...

maresie · maresie

I'm two years out from leaving the A. In fact this weekend is the 2nd anniverary of my taking the dogs from him. That was one of the parts of severing the tie. For me there was a long long road to leaving. The leaving went on long after I had left. In fact in so many ways I am still leaving that relationship...

Rita G · Rita G

5 years ago today - I walked into my first Al-Anon meeting. Scared, unsure of why I was going and how in the world could this thing called Al-Anon help me. I just knew that at that time in my life, I was separated from my husband, he was 6 months sober and I was still miserable, angry and wanting something to c...

Mariner · Mariner

Dear (((((All)))) Today is my MIP 1st birthday I dont recall how I found this place, I was distraught and my life had become unmanagble, obviously my HP brought me here. The one thing I do remember clearly is the feeling I got from the welcome I received. The responses to my original posts where amazin...

New member In need of advice · stigirl

Hi, I just signed up so this is my first post. My father has been fighting all sorts of addictions his whole life. He is on MMT and he continues to drink hard alcohol daily. He has been to rehab 3 times and says he will never go back. I live 30 minutes from my parents house and am at the point where I refu...

teddybearpoet · teddybearpoet

Some of you know I have had problems with depression for many years.. And have gone to the hospital for it as well.. The last couple of weeks I am back there.. I have talked to some in the room.. Ever shared about not being in a good place right now in meetings and in chat.. Friday i spoke to the doc and we are ho...

Inpain · Inpain

When I first came to al-anon, I could not even meet the eyes of the people in the room. I cried silently, in fear, and had so much resentment for even being there. I hit bottom. We talk about A's hitting bottom. I hit mine. At the time I hit the al-anon doorsteps, I didn't recognize who I had become. LI...

Jozie · Jozie

Ok, So here the last couple of days I have been doin some much needed soul searching, and it came to me from a Loving Friend, that I Love others with an open heart, but... Myself... Not so much... I was not offended by this, by no means... but it did bring up somethings that I just never thought about... I alw...

Moe · Moe

Went to my first meeting yesterday and OH Boy. I have/had no idea. I guess that most of us outsiders had no idea what a different life members lead. I got up explained my dilemma then listened to others talk, some were just like me when they started others were just like my girlfriend is/was. One thing I n...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

I have been seeing a great guy for the past 2 mths. We have been going really slowly-at my request and his understanding of where I am, and where I have been, but the past two weeks I can see more in him than I wanted to see. He has so many good qualitites and seems genuine. He does drink on occassion but no...

Karilynn · Karilynn

((((Family))), Just wanted to wish you all who are here in the States a HAPPY LABOR DAY weekend. Enjoy the last traditional weekend of summer. I hope you get the kiddies off to school without loosing your mind! I have seen the glazed look on the parents' faces when they come in to buy sneakers. I hope...

Inpain · Inpain

Thank you to everyone to prayed for me last night. I went into the night with one situation in my mind making me VERY anxious. That situation turned out great. My A had strength last night. I know I can't expect anything for the future, but I am grateful for last night. It was interesting though becaus...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

Hello Friends, Thank you for all the wonderful advice. I took my daughter and her boyfriend to lunch today. I simple let it fly, I told my daughter that I love her and I will support her and her daughter until she finishes school. That promise I made to her 2 yrs ago and I intend to keep it. After all you a...

Dazzlingirl329 · Dazzlingirl329

I am 36 and have been married for 14 years. My husband and I have 1 teenage daughter. My husband is an alcoholic. I have just recently realized that - yes he is one. I can't go to Alanon meetings locally because of the time that the group meets and I can't keep going like I am with out help. I have alwa...

Moe · Moe

I've been dating a girl for years who used to be married to an abusive Alcoholic. She tried everything to get him to stop but that's in her past now. My problem is she lives thes courage to change books as if they are the Bible. I am everything her Ex. wasn't. We never argue, we never fight, we've never had a d...

maresie · maresie

Recently in the past few months I met a neighbor who told me he was sober and living in a clean and sober house. I made a point of not getting too chummy. After a while I noticed that he didn't have much together and always had money problems. That was a red flag. Last week I learned from him that he isn't r...

woopsadaisy · woopsadaisy

Hello Everyone, I am new here and joined the group because I was distraught over my fiance's addictions. It seems that the first two steps were big eye openers for me. They were what I needed to hear! I got the 12 step book, and have been reading it, and re-reading it. What it says about instincts is reall...

Inpain · Inpain

I'm in a bit of an anxious situation.. I knew I'd be anxious and I have to keep repeating, "I cannot control it..I cannot control it", and just pray myself. I'm really focussing on me, but this disease not only affects my A, but me as well. It's very difficult. My mind gets the best of me a LOT o...

Jozie · Jozie

Ok so as most of you know, I have been handling my Afathers affairs since he past last Nov. and it has been nothing short of an up hill battle, and thanks to the help of Al-anon/ACOA I have been moving along, working my program, doing my best, and welp... It dawned on me today that my last conversation with m...

kissers · kissers

I don't know whether to cry or scream. I just heard someone speak tonight who is in AA. It was like everything he did to other people is exactly what my family did to me. They sabotaged my efforts to go to college or lashed out at me. He told me that the reason they did this was because they were jealous. How co...

Bella333 · Bella333

Hello everyone. I want to report some recent progress dealing with my life thanks to Alanon. This past weekend I went to a wedding where my ex-boyfriend (who accompanied me as my platonic date as we are both friends with the bridal couple) threw me a huge curve ball. He got extremely drunk and started hi...

maresie · maresie

I am so glad I read Karilyn's post on resentments today. I have been in a slump, overwhelmed with life pains. I am poor, strapped for time, energy, motivation. I am lonely and isolated and know getting a ftf support group doesn't come overnight. I tried a group therapy for a few weeks and can't say I wil...

Denise · Denise

My husband has come to realize that he has an alcohol problem. He as of today has went to 2 meetings. He has had a problem for years now. Now that he is begining this new life I want to be there for him but I feel helpless and don't really know how to help him. I came from a family to drinkers and have been around i...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

Hello Friends, I am truly at wits end here and I just need to vent a little. My daughter has a boyfriend who just seemed to move right on in and I don't like it at all. My daughter Samantha started college this fall, she has a beautiful daughter and a bright future ahead of her. However seems like she has fo...

Inpain · Inpain

I've done a lot of blaming of my father...he was a dry drunk, mean, angry, pissed off at the world, and never could say he loved me, never showed affection. It hurt. I could never figure it out. Now at almost 40 I've gotten it. I'm making peace. I get it. What's interesting is I've idolized my mom my w...

Kara · Kara

Hi Everyone, This is my first time visiting and posting to this forum, so I look forward to meeting all of you and reading your stories and advice. My question is: have any of you ever experienced the displacement, or transference, of anger (or another emotion)? Perhaps you have reacted with...

Jerry F · Jerry F

Aloha Family...Gather up some of those unsent prayers and fly them down this way for a Family Group member of ours whose wife is on life support. It isn't maintenance this is termination. Cunning, Powerful and Baffling, the disease owned her and for short periods of time she could and would go into a...

Earthwoman54 · Earthwoman54

Hello, I live in Texas and have been in Alanon for years and have not found a good sponsor. At the present time I have a temporary sponsor in which I did my 4th and 5th step with. I feel much better about myself since going on and taking the leap of a 4th and 5th step. I feel like the person who is my temp. sponso...

Dan · Dan

Hi - I'm a new guy. I have attended Alanon on and off for a few years now, but have never attempted to work the program. My brother has been an admitted alcoholic for 7 or more years now, and was in denial for probably 8-10 years before that. This summer, his long-suffering wife found out about an affair h...

mia883 · mia883

I would like to know why the number of men at each alanon meeting has been declining?. When I came in 1987 to the meetings they were two or three men per meeting. Going to assembly usually about 20 men in 1988. In 2009, 22 years laters only or 1 man per meeting and at assembly only 4 or 5 men. Can anyone expla...

Diva · Diva

after complete, total computer crash. Newly built, all new computer is now online, so I must get busy and read all the posts. I send best wishes, love, and joy to all of you. Diva

chezza · chezza

I'd like to share this wee video with you guys as it's approach is all about "stinking thinking" and replacing it with positivity = Gratitude. I have have GIVEN myself a tough 4 days due to resentment build up. I basically started t...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Why am I losing it? (Preview) It's been just two and a half weeks since the divorce and I am losing it! I am not able to concentrate on anything and I am not motivated to do anything. I have company coming this weekend and I just can't get myself in gear to clean house, do laundry, fix meals, just the everyday things that must be done. I ha...	Overcome	10	633	Sep 11, 2009 by maresie
	Overwhelmed Yet Again (Preview) Over 2 weeks ago my husband got suspended from work for refusing to take a drug/alcohol test. He told me that his company offered to let him keep his job if he enters a drug/alcohol program that lasts 5 years. It's the same program that the Board of Pharmacy uses and he'll probably have to enter it anyway...	N8SMOM	6	508	Sep 11, 2009 by maresie
	He threw a punch and missed!!!!! (Preview) Hello and Hugs Everyone! Tomorrow will be two weeks since my husband moved out. HURRAY! Today is day two of his at home detox. He called me a few times and tried to use me as a punching bag, but guess what....he missed...he never landed those punches...i'm too quick you see...i saw them coming and i go...	Sincerely	6	510	Sep 11, 2009 by maresie
	Constant abrupt change of emotions.. Highs to Lows and back again (Preview) Since I started attending meetings, I have noticed that I have had massive emotional outpourings. I remember the night after my very first meeting and sharing, I was talking online to my partner (long distance relationships, different countries - we met for 3 weeks in July and it was truly fantastic...	MooglesPunk	2	1503	Sep 11, 2009 by kitty
	Change! (Preview) Change to the fearful, chage is threatening, because it might mean that things may get worse, to the hopeful change is encouraging beacause things might get better, to the confident change is inspiring, because the challenge exists to make things better. katy x	Katy	1	441	Sep 11, 2009 by MooglesPunk
	It's alright, It's OK (Preview) today was a hectic day and I'm exhausted but it was not as bad as I thought it would be. I made it through the day unscathed and not abused by my aunt. I actually told her I was in school because I thought I want to tell people what's going on and maybe she will also get the message I'm getting ready to move on. I'...	christinajeanne	0	295	Sep 11, 2009 by christinajeanne
	Self Worth - Courage to Change 8/4 (Preview) Reading the passage this morning in Courage to Change for Aug 4th, I am reminded that through my self care, I am slowly finding my self worth. Part of my self care has been my dedication to touch base with my program daily! I made this dedication only a few months back and already I see a huge change within m...	angelchar375	2	548	Sep 11, 2009 by MooglesPunk
	If it's alright (Preview) I have been very hard on myself lately. I've also been isolating. I haven't really been connecting with people. I do find myself getting lonely. I'm fed up with my ABF because he still defends a girl that tried to break us up and said such cruel hurtful things to me and threatened me. I try to explain my fee...	christinajeanne	4	494	Sep 11, 2009 by christinajeanne
	My update and lessons learned (Preview) OK Rita's wish of magic wands and combat boots sure brought something to the day! I love the saying in that card, and am thinking I could really get into the thought of visualising a sparkly pink tutu'd combat booted guardian angel, fairy or whatever she or well ... he wants to be. On to the stuff I really d...	Jennifer	8	473	Sep 10, 2009 by woopsadaisy
	Good insight (Preview) Woops said something in Jennifers thread that really spoke to me. You mention that by talking about your past with A's it opens the doors to new A's. #1 - you tell them you date A's #2 - I'm an A so I need to hide it. Wow! That's exactly what my exabf had to think. I didn't give him all the details of my lif...	Hawk120025	4	572	Sep 10, 2009 by Jennifer
	When They Get Clean (Preview) I can thank Al-Anon for giving me the courage and the tools to let my son get himself clean. He recently married and things are going well. His business status was such that while he was using, he managed not to lose everything. His credit suffered as he was late on making payments at time but somehow...	anonymiss	5	507	Sep 10, 2009 by Jen
	Enabling vs helping What about the children (Preview) My mother and I provide babysitting for my brothers family. My sister-in-law never lifts a finger to clean anything. She seldom even fixes food for the kids. My mom struggles to know when to step in and help the kids by cleaning and trying to get a meal together or if that is enabling the mother to abdicat...	smartkat	7	777	Sep 10, 2009 by smartkat
	90 day journey of self improvement... (Preview) Yesterday I embarked on a 90 day journey of self improvement. I have decided to do this to get on with my life and let go of my ex boyfriend. I am not smoking, drinking, eating carbs or seeking a relationship/sex for the next 90 days. Plus exercising every day. I'm hoping to lose 45lbs in 90 days. I am r...	carolinagirl	8	610	Sep 10, 2009 by kitty
	my share today on courage, faith, hope (Preview) This is from my share today and I was encouraged to share this with others, so Im doing just that. not feeling too prolific but i'll give it a go ;) i was very hopless for so long i was seeing & obsessing on the situations of others and ignoring my own i suffered a lot of pain & anguish mental anxi...	kitty	6	1446	Sep 9, 2009 by christinajeanne
	Ok day one of my steps to give my addiction to hp (Preview) Today I choose to not eat sugar. I may have fruit, and real 100% fruit juice. sigh, I have to. So keep doing the one day at a time, give it to hp. And put down those things I naturally grab to buy. The first step goes thru my head and it is true. Have craved it all my life. Doc just ok'ed me a gluco meter from this co...	debilyn	5	536	Sep 9, 2009 by kitty
	Why is change so bad and scary? (Preview) I am grateful that my step mother shared the wonderful world of Alanon with me. It is times like this that I feel often directionless, stressed, and pressured to be perfect. I have to make the "right choice." I am blessed with the opportunity to be able to seek new employment and have several...	MyThoughts2U2	3	517	Sep 9, 2009 by MyThoughts2U2
	teddybearpoet (Preview) So what are you up to and how are you feeling girl? I keep thinking of you and depression. It is such a hard disease and most feel it in their lives. Grief, different losses, all kinds of things, then for some reason our body cannot get back into that balance of the normal chemicals. That commercial on tv is...	debilyn	4	495	Sep 9, 2009 by teddybearpoet
	As long as there is Al=Anon...there is hope (Preview) Hi. It's been ages since I posted. ( Sorry) You've no idea how many times I have posted,and lost it,or got an error message. But I really wanted to let you all know that really,this Alanon programme is just fantastic. A brief recap on my situation............for those that don't know me. I am English,b...	chris52	4	459	Sep 9, 2009 by chris52
	Blah (Preview) I'm sad. I'm awake in the time I should be sleeping. I don't want to share which means I probably should and I don't know where to start and I really don't want to start the whole eyes leaking big fat tears and not being able to breathe properly so I am not going to. I want this whole new ABF situation clear...	Jennifer	3	585	Sep 9, 2009 by Rita G
	Seeking support in all the wrong places. (Preview) I was in a therapy group for 9 weeks. I had really hoped after the group that someone would call or email from the list we circulated. Noone has. I really don't want to be the person who organizes this because I have a great deal on my plate as it is. I feel like I am always the one who gives and I have had to t...	maresie	4	628	Sep 9, 2009 by maresie
	Will the real Alanon please stand up? (Preview) Hello Dear Friends, Lately, as I relfect on my growth in the program, I feel I am ready to face some problems that I have always encounted in alanon, and feel the need to try and find some clarity in these matters. Alanon has saved my life, in more ways than one, so this post is NOT about the merit of Alanon, o...	MaryPoppins	8	918	Sep 8, 2009 by MaryPoppins
	To New Beginnings (Preview) Well today was a very slow progress of a day, I did manage to do 3 loads of laundry even tho I have been feeling terrible... I don't know if it was something I ate or what but I have been having belly problems all evenning last night, and most of the day today... After such a wonderful weekend, it was kind of a b...	Jozie	4	630	Sep 8, 2009 by hotrod
	why am i complaining (Preview) my dh is alcoholic and also uses prescription drugs when he can get them. he is by all standards successful. owns his own business, is respected in the communitity. we live well. he pays all of the bills and i spend my paycheck the way i want. (usually on the kids or grandkids) he is never mean when h...	debhud	6	642	Sep 8, 2009 by debhud
	I feel really guilty (Preview) I have been on this forum for 7 months and it has helped me so much. but i feel quilty because i dont help others very much at least not recently..im in a different place to the one where i fel like there was no way out, wanted to die, couldnt believe it...trouble is I still cant believe it and it has for some re...	Lilly Burn	9	577	Sep 8, 2009 by blender_girl
	husband was arrested last night (Preview) he was extremely intoxicated. He snapped and started to hit me. he punched me in the chest and he twisted my arms. thankfully, another couple was here and the guy was able to get him off of me. AH then went to bed. after 10 min or so, i went to check on him with my friend. he was unconscious, his body was...	need lots of help	14	774	Sep 8, 2009 by neshema2
	We're Seperated (Preview) Hello Everyone! After many days of fussing and fighting and saying i wanted to move out and so on..i just had enough. Last Friday night, I begged him to leave. I called a friend of his and told him that I am serious and I needed his help. I needed a witness to what I was about to tell him, cause he (my A) thou...	Sincerely	9	691	Sep 8, 2009 by neshema2
	Question (Preview) I have heard alot lately about the book getting them sober by toby rice. i was just wondering if this book is a good read for families of recovery alcoholics or if it focuses on the active alcoholic. any feedback would be greatly appreciated. Tara	TF	6	472	Sep 8, 2009 by canadianguy
	control of self (Preview) I have notice a lot lately how I react to what ever environment I am in or what people I am surrounded by. My boss talks about others, critising, judging I dont want to hear it but I am trying to be polite and I feel obliged to engage in the conversation. I always try and get her to see that other persons good p...	Tracy	7	1800	Sep 8, 2009 by woopsadaisy
	Your support (Preview) I am overwhelmed with all the people who took time to read my "lost" post. Also to all the ones who responded. I was so afraid my integrity was ruined but you all showed me the truth. It has been a HUGE lesson! thank you! Next time someone attacks my person, as we know in this world it happens too m...	debilyn	4	440	Sep 8, 2009 by neshema2
	Getting to the nitty gritty. (Preview) I'm two years out from leaving the A. In fact this weekend is the 2nd anniverary of my taking the dogs from him. That was one of the parts of severing the tie. For me there was a long long road to leaving. The leaving went on long after I had left. In fact in so many ways I am still leaving that relationship...	maresie	5	563	Sep 8, 2009 by maresie
	Happy Recovery Birthday to ME!!! (Preview) 5 years ago today - I walked into my first Al-Anon meeting. Scared, unsure of why I was going and how in the world could this thing called Al-Anon help me. I just knew that at that time in my life, I was separated from my husband, he was 6 months sober and I was still miserable, angry and wanting something to c...	Rita G	12	576	Sep 8, 2009 by Rita G
	One Year On (Preview) Dear (((((All)))) Today is my MIP 1st birthday I dont recall how I found this place, I was distraught and my life had become unmanagble, obviously my HP brought me here. The one thing I do remember clearly is the feeling I got from the welcome I received. The responses to my original posts where amazin...	Mariner	8	525	Sep 7, 2009 by Suzannah
	New member In need of advice (Preview) Hi, I just signed up so this is my first post. My father has been fighting all sorts of addictions his whole life. He is on MMT and he continues to drink hard alcohol daily. He has been to rehab 3 times and says he will never go back. I live 30 minutes from my parents house and am at the point where I refu...	stigirl	8	616	Sep 7, 2009 by abbyal
	Prayer for depression (Preview) Some of you know I have had problems with depression for many years.. And have gone to the hospital for it as well.. The last couple of weeks I am back there.. I have talked to some in the room.. Ever shared about not being in a good place right now in meetings and in chat.. Friday i spoke to the doc and we are ho...	teddybearpoet	12	669	Sep 7, 2009 by teddybearpoet
	A newbie share.. (Preview) When I first came to al-anon, I could not even meet the eyes of the people in the room. I cried silently, in fear, and had so much resentment for even being there. I hit bottom. We talk about A's hitting bottom. I hit mine. At the time I hit the al-anon doorsteps, I didn't recognize who I had become. LI...	Inpain	4	483	Sep 7, 2009 by Peggy7
	Looking for insight & ESH... (Preview) Ok, So here the last couple of days I have been doin some much needed soul searching, and it came to me from a Loving Friend, that I Love others with an open heart, but... Myself... Not so much... I was not offended by this, by no means... but it did bring up somethings that I just never thought about... I alw...	Jozie	2	513	Sep 6, 2009 by maresie
	A-lAnon Killing our Relatioship (Update) (Preview) Went to my first meeting yesterday and OH Boy. I have/had no idea. I guess that most of us outsiders had no idea what a different life members lead. I got up explained my dilemma then listened to others talk, some were just like me when they started others were just like my girlfriend is/was. One thing I n...	Moe	11	789	Sep 6, 2009 by Tracy
	Does it ever just go away?? Completely?? In need of ESH...... (Preview) I have been seeing a great guy for the past 2 mths. We have been going really slowly-at my request and his understanding of where I am, and where I have been, but the past two weeks I can see more in him than I wanted to see. He has so many good qualitites and seems genuine. He does drink on occassion but no...	shellyj123	7	745	Sep 5, 2009 by Tenderheartsks
	Happy Labor Day weekend! (Preview) ((((Family))), Just wanted to wish you all who are here in the States a HAPPY LABOR DAY weekend. Enjoy the last traditional weekend of summer. I hope you get the kiddies off to school without loosing your mind! I have seen the glazed look on the parents' faces when they come in to buy sneakers. I hope...	Karilynn	4	465	Sep 4, 2009 by bubbles1990
	Thank you. (Preview) Thank you to everyone to prayed for me last night. I went into the night with one situation in my mind making me VERY anxious. That situation turned out great. My A had strength last night. I know I can't expect anything for the future, but I am grateful for last night. It was interesting though becaus...	Inpain	1	399	Sep 4, 2009 by bubbles1990
	Taking Back Control of My Home (Preview) Hello Friends, Thank you for all the wonderful advice. I took my daughter and her boyfriend to lunch today. I simple let it fly, I told my daughter that I love her and I will support her and her daughter until she finishes school. That promise I made to her 2 yrs ago and I intend to keep it. After all you a...	Andrea12	12	648	Sep 4, 2009 by maresie
	Hi everyone. This is my first time here. Can I live like this and be happy? (Preview) I am 36 and have been married for 14 years. My husband and I have 1 teenage daughter. My husband is an alcoholic. I have just recently realized that - yes he is one. I can't go to Alanon meetings locally because of the time that the group meets and I can't keep going like I am with out help. I have alwa...	Dazzlingirl329	9	589	Sep 4, 2009 by maresie
	A-lAnon Killing our Relatioship (Preview) I've been dating a girl for years who used to be married to an abusive Alcoholic. She tried everything to get him to stop but that's in her past now. My problem is she lives thes courage to change books as if they are the Bible. I am everything her Ex. wasn't. We never argue, we never fight, we've never had a d...	Moe	19	821	Sep 4, 2009 by Moe
	Wrong attitude (Preview) Recently in the past few months I met a neighbor who told me he was sober and living in a clean and sober house. I made a point of not getting too chummy. After a while I noticed that he didn't have much together and always had money problems. That was a red flag. Last week I learned from him that he isn't r...	maresie	9	651	Sep 4, 2009 by maresie
	Hola (Preview) Hello Everyone, I am new here and joined the group because I was distraught over my fiance's addictions. It seems that the first two steps were big eye openers for me. They were what I needed to hear! I got the 12 step book, and have been reading it, and re-reading it. What it says about instincts is reall...	woopsadaisy	3	490	Sep 4, 2009 by woopsadaisy
	Please say a prayer for me tonight.. (Preview) I'm in a bit of an anxious situation.. I knew I'd be anxious and I have to keep repeating, "I cannot control it..I cannot control it", and just pray myself. I'm really focussing on me, but this disease not only affects my A, but me as well. It's very difficult. My mind gets the best of me a LOT o...	Inpain	6	618	Sep 3, 2009 by Jerry F
	Daddy-O Strikes again.... (Preview) Ok so as most of you know, I have been handling my Afathers affairs since he past last Nov. and it has been nothing short of an up hill battle, and thanks to the help of Al-anon/ACOA I have been moving along, working my program, doing my best, and welp... It dawned on me today that my last conversation with m...	Jozie	4	604	Sep 3, 2009 by Andrea12
	The truth has come out. (Preview) I don't know whether to cry or scream. I just heard someone speak tonight who is in AA. It was like everything he did to other people is exactly what my family did to me. They sabotaged my efforts to go to college or lashed out at me. He told me that the reason they did this was because they were jealous. How co...	kissers	7	647	Sep 3, 2009 by canadianguy
	Progress thanks to Alanon (Preview) Hello everyone. I want to report some recent progress dealing with my life thanks to Alanon. This past weekend I went to a wedding where my ex-boyfriend (who accompanied me as my platonic date as we are both friends with the bridal couple) threw me a huge curve ball. He got extremely drunk and started hi...	Bella333	3	343	Sep 3, 2009 by blender_girl
	Life on Life's Terms (Preview) I am so glad I read Karilyn's post on resentments today. I have been in a slump, overwhelmed with life pains. I am poor, strapped for time, energy, motivation. I am lonely and isolated and know getting a ftf support group doesn't come overnight. I tried a group therapy for a few weeks and can't say I wil...	maresie	6	732	Sep 3, 2009 by maresie
	How do I help my husband???? (Preview) My husband has come to realize that he has an alcohol problem. He as of today has went to 2 meetings. He has had a problem for years now. Now that he is begining this new life I want to be there for him but I feel helpless and don't really know how to help him. I came from a family to drinkers and have been around i...	Denise	12	714	Sep 3, 2009 by maresie
	At Wits End (Preview) Hello Friends, I am truly at wits end here and I just need to vent a little. My daughter has a boyfriend who just seemed to move right on in and I don't like it at all. My daughter Samantha started college this fall, she has a beautiful daughter and a bright future ahead of her. However seems like she has fo...	Andrea12	8	611	Sep 3, 2009 by maresie
	The blame game - my family of origin (Preview) I've done a lot of blaming of my father...he was a dry drunk, mean, angry, pissed off at the world, and never could say he loved me, never showed affection. It hurt. I could never figure it out. Now at almost 40 I've gotten it. I'm making peace. I get it. What's interesting is I've idolized my mom my w...	Inpain	3	1566	Sep 3, 2009 by Dazzlingirl329
	Have you ever had displaced anger? (Preview) Hi Everyone, This is my first time visiting and posting to this forum, so I look forward to meeting all of you and reading your stories and advice. My question is: have any of you ever experienced the displacement, or transference, of anger (or another emotion)? Perhaps you have reacted with...	Kara	7	4140	Sep 3, 2009 by RunnerChick
	Time to let some prayers fly... (Preview) Aloha Family...Gather up some of those unsent prayers and fly them down this way for a Family Group member of ours whose wife is on life support. It isn't maintenance this is termination. Cunning, Powerful and Baffling, the disease owned her and for short periods of time she could and would go into a...	Jerry F	22	1116	Sep 3, 2009 by Jozie
	Searching for a Sponsor (Preview) Hello, I live in Texas and have been in Alanon for years and have not found a good sponsor. At the present time I have a temporary sponsor in which I did my 4th and 5th step with. I feel much better about myself since going on and taking the leap of a 4th and 5th step. I feel like the person who is my temp. sponso...	Earthwoman54	2	643	Sep 3, 2009 by Jerry F
	Hello (Preview) Hi - I'm a new guy. I have attended Alanon on and off for a few years now, but have never attempted to work the program. My brother has been an admitted alcoholic for 7 or more years now, and was in denial for probably 8-10 years before that. This summer, his long-suffering wife found out about an affair h...	Dan	6	562	Sep 3, 2009 by Jerry F
	Number of men at each alanon meeting declining? Australia (Preview) I would like to know why the number of men at each alanon meeting has been declining?. When I came in 1987 to the meetings they were two or three men per meeting. Going to assembly usually about 20 men in 1988. In 2009, 22 years laters only or 1 man per meeting and at assembly only 4 or 5 men. Can anyone expla...	mia883	7	1081	Sep 3, 2009 by Jerry F
	I'm baaaaaack......... (Preview) after complete, total computer crash. Newly built, all new computer is now online, so I must get busy and read all the posts. I send best wishes, love, and joy to all of you. Diva	Diva	11	476	Sep 2, 2009 by bubbles1990
	Attitude = Gratitude (Preview) I'd like to share this wee video with you guys as it's approach is all about "stinking thinking" and replacing it with positivity = Gratitude. I have have GIVEN myself a tough 4 days due to resentment build up. I basically started t...	chezza	3	631	Sep 2, 2009 by tea2
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.