Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

chezza · chezza

well it has been a very hard few weeks for me from meeting my sponsor for the first time to chat and now made a complete connection by braving my first phone call to her. I have always found it hard to trust anyone to open up and this now feels so natural. I feel so lucky to have this program and the magnifican...

blender_girl · blender_girl

I shared on this the other day during a meeting and wanted to post my thoughts on it here as well. I've been doing a lot of thinking lately along the lines of examining what drives me crazy about other people in my life and the notion that this may be because it's something I don't like about myself. And in...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I HAVE BEEN SO BUSY LATELY THAT I HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE TO CATCH UP ON THIS SITE! I HAVE BEEN DOING PRETTY WELL. HAD A COUPLE ROUGH NITES A FEW DAYS AGO BUT I AM A SURVIVOR & I AM BACK ON TRACK. TODAY IS A GOOD DAY--I AM NOT GOING TO LET MY MOTHER CONTROL ME TODAY. I PURPOSELY WAITED TO COME DOWN HERE TO GET ON THI...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hi family, I am ready to share what has been happening in my life. My husbands disease has taken full control over him and he has been going further and further into his disease for a while now. I have been struggling with asking him to leave or not. What is best for the kids and I was a fight in my head and hear...

smartkat · smartkat

I don't mean the ones we all know from AlAnon. I mean like "Put down the magnifying glass and pick up the mirror." That one struck me because I have a real tendency to read the ODAAT with a mindset of what my brother could learn from a reading in dealing with his wife and kids. It takes a bit for m...

Diva · Diva

He is drunk. 6 day binge and not showing any signs of coming off it. He is determined to die, and he is doing a great job of seeing that come about. He cannot eat without throwing up, is losing weight, and just keeps drinking...not fussy about his liquor. Gin, vodka, beer, wine; anything will do. Al...

StargazerLily · StargazerLily

My mom and dad took in roommates earlier this year. They needed extra money. Of course giving up the Captain Morgans was not an option. They took in a homeless couple they knew nothing about. Fast forward to now. The roommates are crazy and made up a story about my parents to have them arrested. My mom cal...

Hawk120025 · Hawk120025

Today has been a tough day. It's been 6 weeks since breaking up with my abf. I've learned alot and progressed in my recovery, but today has been difficult. Today, in fact, I've been questioning my decision to break up with him. I did so because I did not want to be on the receiving end of his alcoholi...

debilyn · debilyn

The first night no sugar was hard. I cannot even imagine someone quitting smoking and or using. My mood has been great though. Today was not hard at all. Had a feeling and drove up and saw my AH. He told me he had been so depressed for a few days. So that is what I felt. I feel him when he is not using. When he uses...

Gailey · Gailey

I don't think I posted this....my dil is pregnant. She and my son have been trying for 7 years. She had IVF 2 times and was planning on having it again this month. While my son was deployed and was in Perth, Austrailia she flew there from Japan and spent a week with him. Low and behold....she got pregnant. W...

artsyinnj · artsyinnj

Hi everyone, I came to these boards because I don't know where else to start. I'll try to give a concise background. It may be biased as this is how I perceived everything. My boyfriend and I worked for the same company. I am 30, and he is 36. We became friendly in April 2008 and started dating in August...

Diva · Diva

A has been drunk, and most of the time passed out, for the past four days. And what about me? I've been SHOPPING! Clothes, shoes, purses, scarfs, coats. I am going for the complete new wardrobe. WOW! What fun. No need for me to whine and cry over his situation. Actually, peeps, I am really enjoy...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

For those of you who have followed my story from last August on....here is where I find myself today.... I'm still working the program and am in the process of beginning my second round through the steps (not sure if this will be with or without a sponsor but I am determined it needs to and will be done agai...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((((Family)))), On this day September 11 may we remember those lives lost. May we remember the many Alanon family members who are grieving for their family & friends. May we honor their memories with a simple act of kindness. May we offer prayers for all on this day. Much love and blessings...

smartkat · smartkat

(Asking questions on behalf of my mother because she doesnt have the internet) My mom watches the kids when my brother is at work and my sister-in-law needs to go to a meeting. When my mom goes over there in time for my SIL to make a meeting, Mom often finds the special needs child in her bedroom covered in...

Karilynn · Karilynn

((((Family))), Well it finally happened. My brother in law was arrested at a meth lab. He was cooking up a batch when the police raided it. He's sitting in jail with no bail. More charges are pending. This was only a matter of time. Five years ago the family garage burnt down. The police had no p...

danz123 · danz123

September 13 Business Meeting Agenda I. Review of August minutes II.Review of op meeting schedule III.New Business Chat Room Security Please pm me if you have any additional items. hugs, danz

Rora · Rora

I've read on this board that if you are doing something for another, whom has the time, ability and facility to do it for themselves, then you are engaging in enabling behaviour. I agree. I've had the opportunity to set a different boundary with my ex-aH recently and though I know it is the right thing,...

Overcome · Overcome

It's been just two and a half weeks since the divorce and I am losing it! I am not able to concentrate on anything and I am not motivated to do anything. I have company coming this weekend and I just can't get myself in gear to clean house, do laundry, fix meals, just the everyday things that must be done. I ha...

N8SMOM · N8SMOM

Over 2 weeks ago my husband got suspended from work for refusing to take a drug/alcohol test. He told me that his company offered to let him keep his job if he enters a drug/alcohol program that lasts 5 years. It's the same program that the Board of Pharmacy uses and he'll probably have to enter it anyway...

Sincerely · Sincerely

Hello and Hugs Everyone! Tomorrow will be two weeks since my husband moved out. HURRAY! Today is day two of his at home detox. He called me a few times and tried to use me as a punching bag, but guess what....he missed...he never landed those punches...i'm too quick you see...i saw them coming and i go...

MooglesPunk · MooglesPunk

Since I started attending meetings, I have noticed that I have had massive emotional outpourings. I remember the night after my very first meeting and sharing, I was talking online to my partner (long distance relationships, different countries - we met for 3 weeks in July and it was truly fantastic...

Katy · Katy

Change to the fearful, chage is threatening, because it might mean that things may get worse, to the hopeful change is encouraging beacause things might get better, to the confident change is inspiring, because the challenge exists to make things better. katy x

christinajeanne · christinajeanne

today was a hectic day and I'm exhausted but it was not as bad as I thought it would be. I made it through the day unscathed and not abused by my aunt. I actually told her I was in school because I thought I want to tell people what's going on and maybe she will also get the message I'm getting ready to move on. I'...

angelchar375 · angelchar375

Reading the passage this morning in Courage to Change for Aug 4th, I am reminded that through my self care, I am slowly finding my self worth. Part of my self care has been my dedication to touch base with my program daily! I made this dedication only a few months back and already I see a huge change within m...

christinajeanne · christinajeanne

I have been very hard on myself lately. I've also been isolating. I haven't really been connecting with people. I do find myself getting lonely. I'm fed up with my ABF because he still defends a girl that tried to break us up and said such cruel hurtful things to me and threatened me. I try to explain my fee...

Jennifer · Jennifer

OK Rita's wish of magic wands and combat boots sure brought something to the day! I love the saying in that card, and am thinking I could really get into the thought of visualising a sparkly pink tutu'd combat booted guardian angel, fairy or whatever she or well ... he wants to be. On to the stuff I really d...

Hawk120025 · Hawk120025

Woops said something in Jennifers thread that really spoke to me. You mention that by talking about your past with A's it opens the doors to new A's. #1 - you tell them you date A's #2 - I'm an A so I need to hide it. Wow! That's exactly what my exabf had to think. I didn't give him all the details of my lif...

anonymiss · anonymiss

I can thank Al-Anon for giving me the courage and the tools to let my son get himself clean. He recently married and things are going well. His business status was such that while he was using, he managed not to lose everything. His credit suffered as he was late on making payments at time but somehow...

smartkat · smartkat

My mother and I provide babysitting for my brothers family. My sister-in-law never lifts a finger to clean anything. She seldom even fixes food for the kids. My mom struggles to know when to step in and help the kids by cleaning and trying to get a meal together or if that is enabling the mother to abdicat...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Yesterday I embarked on a 90 day journey of self improvement. I have decided to do this to get on with my life and let go of my ex boyfriend. I am not smoking, drinking, eating carbs or seeking a relationship/sex for the next 90 days. Plus exercising every day. I'm hoping to lose 45lbs in 90 days. I am r...

kitty · kitty

This is from my share today and I was encouraged to share this with others, so Im doing just that. not feeling too prolific but i'll give it a go ;) i was very hopless for so long i was seeing & obsessing on the situations of others and ignoring my own i suffered a lot of pain & anguish mental anxi...

debilyn · debilyn

Today I choose to not eat sugar. I may have fruit, and real 100% fruit juice. sigh, I have to. So keep doing the one day at a time, give it to hp. And put down those things I naturally grab to buy. The first step goes thru my head and it is true. Have craved it all my life. Doc just ok'ed me a gluco meter from this co...

MyThoughts2U2 · MyThoughts2U2

I am grateful that my step mother shared the wonderful world of Alanon with me. It is times like this that I feel often directionless, stressed, and pressured to be perfect. I have to make the "right choice." I am blessed with the opportunity to be able to seek new employment and have several...

debilyn · debilyn

So what are you up to and how are you feeling girl? I keep thinking of you and depression. It is such a hard disease and most feel it in their lives. Grief, different losses, all kinds of things, then for some reason our body cannot get back into that balance of the normal chemicals. That commercial on tv is...

chris52 · chris52

Hi. It's been ages since I posted. ( Sorry) You've no idea how many times I have posted,and lost it,or got an error message. But I really wanted to let you all know that really,this Alanon programme is just fantastic. A brief recap on my situation............for those that don't know me. I am English,b...

Jennifer · Jennifer

I'm sad. I'm awake in the time I should be sleeping. I don't want to share which means I probably should and I don't know where to start and I really don't want to start the whole eyes leaking big fat tears and not being able to breathe properly so I am not going to. I want this whole new ABF situation clear...

maresie · maresie

I was in a therapy group for 9 weeks. I had really hoped after the group that someone would call or email from the list we circulated. Noone has. I really don't want to be the person who organizes this because I have a great deal on my plate as it is. I feel like I am always the one who gives and I have had to t...

MaryPoppins · MaryPoppins

Hello Dear Friends, Lately, as I relfect on my growth in the program, I feel I am ready to face some problems that I have always encounted in alanon, and feel the need to try and find some clarity in these matters. Alanon has saved my life, in more ways than one, so this post is NOT about the merit of Alanon, o...

Jozie · Jozie

Well today was a very slow progress of a day, I did manage to do 3 loads of laundry even tho I have been feeling terrible... I don't know if it was something I ate or what but I have been having belly problems all evenning last night, and most of the day today... After such a wonderful weekend, it was kind of a b...

debhud · debhud

my dh is alcoholic and also uses prescription drugs when he can get them. he is by all standards successful. owns his own business, is respected in the communitity. we live well. he pays all of the bills and i spend my paycheck the way i want. (usually on the kids or grandkids) he is never mean when h...

Lilly Burn · Lilly Burn

I have been on this forum for 7 months and it has helped me so much. but i feel quilty because i dont help others very much at least not recently..im in a different place to the one where i fel like there was no way out, wanted to die, couldnt believe it...trouble is I still cant believe it and it has for some re...

need lots of help · need lots of help

he was extremely intoxicated. He snapped and started to hit me. he punched me in the chest and he twisted my arms. thankfully, another couple was here and the guy was able to get him off of me. AH then went to bed. after 10 min or so, i went to check on him with my friend. he was unconscious, his body was...

Sincerely · Sincerely

Hello Everyone! After many days of fussing and fighting and saying i wanted to move out and so on..i just had enough. Last Friday night, I begged him to leave. I called a friend of his and told him that I am serious and I needed his help. I needed a witness to what I was about to tell him, cause he (my A) thou...

TF · TF

I have heard alot lately about the book getting them sober by toby rice. i was just wondering if this book is a good read for families of recovery alcoholics or if it focuses on the active alcoholic. any feedback would be greatly appreciated. Tara

Tracy · Tracy

I have notice a lot lately how I react to what ever environment I am in or what people I am surrounded by. My boss talks about others, critising, judging I dont want to hear it but I am trying to be polite and I feel obliged to engage in the conversation. I always try and get her to see that other persons good p...

debilyn · debilyn

I am overwhelmed with all the people who took time to read my "lost" post. Also to all the ones who responded. I was so afraid my integrity was ruined but you all showed me the truth. It has been a HUGE lesson! thank you! Next time someone attacks my person, as we know in this world it happens too m...

maresie · maresie

I'm two years out from leaving the A. In fact this weekend is the 2nd anniverary of my taking the dogs from him. That was one of the parts of severing the tie. For me there was a long long road to leaving. The leaving went on long after I had left. In fact in so many ways I am still leaving that relationship...

Rita G · Rita G

5 years ago today - I walked into my first Al-Anon meeting. Scared, unsure of why I was going and how in the world could this thing called Al-Anon help me. I just knew that at that time in my life, I was separated from my husband, he was 6 months sober and I was still miserable, angry and wanting something to c...

Mariner · Mariner

Dear (((((All)))) Today is my MIP 1st birthday I dont recall how I found this place, I was distraught and my life had become unmanagble, obviously my HP brought me here. The one thing I do remember clearly is the feeling I got from the welcome I received. The responses to my original posts where amazin...

New member In need of advice · stigirl

Hi, I just signed up so this is my first post. My father has been fighting all sorts of addictions his whole life. He is on MMT and he continues to drink hard alcohol daily. He has been to rehab 3 times and says he will never go back. I live 30 minutes from my parents house and am at the point where I refu...

teddybearpoet · teddybearpoet

Some of you know I have had problems with depression for many years.. And have gone to the hospital for it as well.. The last couple of weeks I am back there.. I have talked to some in the room.. Ever shared about not being in a good place right now in meetings and in chat.. Friday i spoke to the doc and we are ho...

Inpain · Inpain

When I first came to al-anon, I could not even meet the eyes of the people in the room. I cried silently, in fear, and had so much resentment for even being there. I hit bottom. We talk about A's hitting bottom. I hit mine. At the time I hit the al-anon doorsteps, I didn't recognize who I had become. LI...

Jozie · Jozie

Ok, So here the last couple of days I have been doin some much needed soul searching, and it came to me from a Loving Friend, that I Love others with an open heart, but... Myself... Not so much... I was not offended by this, by no means... but it did bring up somethings that I just never thought about... I alw...

Moe · Moe

Went to my first meeting yesterday and OH Boy. I have/had no idea. I guess that most of us outsiders had no idea what a different life members lead. I got up explained my dilemma then listened to others talk, some were just like me when they started others were just like my girlfriend is/was. One thing I n...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

I have been seeing a great guy for the past 2 mths. We have been going really slowly-at my request and his understanding of where I am, and where I have been, but the past two weeks I can see more in him than I wanted to see. He has so many good qualitites and seems genuine. He does drink on occassion but no...

Karilynn · Karilynn

((((Family))), Just wanted to wish you all who are here in the States a HAPPY LABOR DAY weekend. Enjoy the last traditional weekend of summer. I hope you get the kiddies off to school without loosing your mind! I have seen the glazed look on the parents' faces when they come in to buy sneakers. I hope...

Inpain · Inpain

Thank you to everyone to prayed for me last night. I went into the night with one situation in my mind making me VERY anxious. That situation turned out great. My A had strength last night. I know I can't expect anything for the future, but I am grateful for last night. It was interesting though becaus...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

Hello Friends, Thank you for all the wonderful advice. I took my daughter and her boyfriend to lunch today. I simple let it fly, I told my daughter that I love her and I will support her and her daughter until she finishes school. That promise I made to her 2 yrs ago and I intend to keep it. After all you a...

Dazzlingirl329 · Dazzlingirl329

I am 36 and have been married for 14 years. My husband and I have 1 teenage daughter. My husband is an alcoholic. I have just recently realized that - yes he is one. I can't go to Alanon meetings locally because of the time that the group meets and I can't keep going like I am with out help. I have alwa...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	My step journey so far (Preview) well it has been a very hard few weeks for me from meeting my sponsor for the first time to chat and now made a complete connection by braving my first phone call to her. I have always found it hard to trust anyone to open up and this now feels so natural. I feel so lucky to have this program and the magnifican...	chezza	1	451	Sep 14, 2009 by kitty
	Slight Shift in Perspective (Preview) I shared on this the other day during a meeting and wanted to post my thoughts on it here as well. I've been doing a lot of thinking lately along the lines of examining what drives me crazy about other people in my life and the notion that this may be because it's something I don't like about myself. And in...	blender_girl	4	559	Sep 14, 2009 by chezza
	REMEMBERING TO KEEP IN TOUCH! (Preview) I HAVE BEEN SO BUSY LATELY THAT I HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE TO CATCH UP ON THIS SITE! I HAVE BEEN DOING PRETTY WELL. HAD A COUPLE ROUGH NITES A FEW DAYS AGO BUT I AM A SURVIVOR & I AM BACK ON TRACK. TODAY IS A GOOD DAY--I AM NOT GOING TO LET MY MOTHER CONTROL ME TODAY. I PURPOSELY WAITED TO COME DOWN HERE TO GET ON THI...	Hoot Nanny	3	629	Sep 14, 2009 by Mandy123
	It works if you work it. (Preview) Hi family, I am ready to share what has been happening in my life. My husbands disease has taken full control over him and he has been going further and further into his disease for a while now. I have been struggling with asking him to leave or not. What is best for the kids and I was a fight in my head and hear...	Mandy123	6	625	Sep 14, 2009 by babysteps
	What are your favorite personal slogans? (Preview) I don't mean the ones we all know from AlAnon. I mean like "Put down the magnifying glass and pick up the mirror." That one struck me because I have a real tendency to read the ODAAT with a mindset of what my brother could learn from a reading in dealing with his wife and kids. It takes a bit for m...	smartkat	17	2291	Sep 13, 2009 by Jennifer
	Where's the miracle here? (Preview) He is drunk. 6 day binge and not showing any signs of coming off it. He is determined to die, and he is doing a great job of seeing that come about. He cannot eat without throwing up, is losing weight, and just keeps drinking...not fussy about his liquor. Gin, vodka, beer, wine; anything will do. Al...	Diva	20	994	Sep 13, 2009 by Ness
	My A's are acting up (Preview) My mom and dad took in roommates earlier this year. They needed extra money. Of course giving up the Captain Morgans was not an option. They took in a homeless couple they knew nothing about. Fast forward to now. The roommates are crazy and made up a story about my parents to have them arrested. My mom cal...	StargazerLily	2	562	Sep 13, 2009 by RunnerChick
	Questioning my decision.....send in the reinforcements.... (Preview) Today has been a tough day. It's been 6 weeks since breaking up with my abf. I've learned alot and progressed in my recovery, but today has been difficult. Today, in fact, I've been questioning my decision to break up with him. I did so because I did not want to be on the receiving end of his alcoholi...	Hawk120025	9	681	Sep 12, 2009 by lonewolfmama
	Little update (Preview) The first night no sugar was hard. I cannot even imagine someone quitting smoking and or using. My mood has been great though. Today was not hard at all. Had a feeling and drove up and saw my AH. He told me he had been so depressed for a few days. So that is what I felt. I feel him when he is not using. When he uses...	debilyn	5	615	Sep 12, 2009 by Jennifer
	very exciting news (Preview) I don't think I posted this....my dil is pregnant. She and my son have been trying for 7 years. She had IVF 2 times and was planning on having it again this month. While my son was deployed and was in Perth, Austrailia she flew there from Japan and spent a week with him. Low and behold....she got pregnant. W...	Gailey	10	547	Sep 12, 2009 by Peggy7
	New here - my story (Preview) Hi everyone, I came to these boards because I don't know where else to start. I'll try to give a concise background. It may be biased as this is how I perceived everything. My boyfriend and I worked for the same company. I am 30, and he is 36. We became friendly in April 2008 and started dating in August...	artsyinnj	9	680	Sep 12, 2009 by Mattie
	I LOVE the shopping! (Preview) A has been drunk, and most of the time passed out, for the past four days. And what about me? I've been SHOPPING! Clothes, shoes, purses, scarfs, coats. I am going for the complete new wardrobe. WOW! What fun. No need for me to whine and cry over his situation. Actually, peeps, I am really enjoy...	Diva	7	553	Sep 12, 2009 by Karilynn
	Can I ever have a "normal" relationship w/someone who drinks "normally" ESH needed (Preview) For those of you who have followed my story from last August on....here is where I find myself today.... I'm still working the program and am in the process of beginning my second round through the steps (not sure if this will be with or without a sponsor but I am determined it needs to and will be done agai...	shellyj123	5	826	Sep 12, 2009 by Rora
	We remember& honor (Preview) (((((Family)))), On this day September 11 may we remember those lives lost. May we remember the many Alanon family members who are grieving for their family & friends. May we honor their memories with a simple act of kindness. May we offer prayers for all on this day. Much love and blessings...	Karilynn	6	646	Sep 11, 2009 by Diva
	A grandmother's specific problem with special needs child and an alcoholic 'mother.' (Preview) (Asking questions on behalf of my mother because she doesnt have the internet) My mom watches the kids when my brother is at work and my sister-in-law needs to go to a meeting. When my mom goes over there in time for my SIL to make a meeting, Mom often finds the special needs child in her bedroom covered in...	smartkat	5	636	Sep 11, 2009 by smartkat
	Arrested. (Preview) ((((Family))), Well it finally happened. My brother in law was arrested at a meth lab. He was cooking up a batch when the police raided it. He's sitting in jail with no bail. More charges are pending. This was only a matter of time. Five years ago the family garage burnt down. The police had no p...	Karilynn	11	711	Sep 11, 2009 by wp
	September Business meeting Agenda (Preview) September 13 Business Meeting Agenda I. Review of August minutes II.Review of op meeting schedule III.New Business Chat Room Security Please pm me if you have any additional items. hugs, danz	danz123	0	596	Sep 11, 2009 by danz123
	Detaching...unleashing myself from the viscious grips of enabling behaviour... (Preview) I've read on this board that if you are doing something for another, whom has the time, ability and facility to do it for themselves, then you are engaging in enabling behaviour. I agree. I've had the opportunity to set a different boundary with my ex-aH recently and though I know it is the right thing,...	Rora	4	833	Sep 11, 2009 by Mandy123
	Why am I losing it? (Preview) It's been just two and a half weeks since the divorce and I am losing it! I am not able to concentrate on anything and I am not motivated to do anything. I have company coming this weekend and I just can't get myself in gear to clean house, do laundry, fix meals, just the everyday things that must be done. I ha...	Overcome	10	686	Sep 11, 2009 by maresie
	Overwhelmed Yet Again (Preview) Over 2 weeks ago my husband got suspended from work for refusing to take a drug/alcohol test. He told me that his company offered to let him keep his job if he enters a drug/alcohol program that lasts 5 years. It's the same program that the Board of Pharmacy uses and he'll probably have to enter it anyway...	N8SMOM	6	561	Sep 11, 2009 by maresie
	He threw a punch and missed!!!!! (Preview) Hello and Hugs Everyone! Tomorrow will be two weeks since my husband moved out. HURRAY! Today is day two of his at home detox. He called me a few times and tried to use me as a punching bag, but guess what....he missed...he never landed those punches...i'm too quick you see...i saw them coming and i go...	Sincerely	6	562	Sep 11, 2009 by maresie
	Constant abrupt change of emotions.. Highs to Lows and back again (Preview) Since I started attending meetings, I have noticed that I have had massive emotional outpourings. I remember the night after my very first meeting and sharing, I was talking online to my partner (long distance relationships, different countries - we met for 3 weeks in July and it was truly fantastic...	MooglesPunk	2	1564	Sep 11, 2009 by kitty
	Change! (Preview) Change to the fearful, chage is threatening, because it might mean that things may get worse, to the hopeful change is encouraging beacause things might get better, to the confident change is inspiring, because the challenge exists to make things better. katy x	Katy	1	496	Sep 11, 2009 by MooglesPunk
	It's alright, It's OK (Preview) today was a hectic day and I'm exhausted but it was not as bad as I thought it would be. I made it through the day unscathed and not abused by my aunt. I actually told her I was in school because I thought I want to tell people what's going on and maybe she will also get the message I'm getting ready to move on. I'...	christinajeanne	0	346	Sep 11, 2009 by christinajeanne
	Self Worth - Courage to Change 8/4 (Preview) Reading the passage this morning in Courage to Change for Aug 4th, I am reminded that through my self care, I am slowly finding my self worth. Part of my self care has been my dedication to touch base with my program daily! I made this dedication only a few months back and already I see a huge change within m...	angelchar375	2	603	Sep 11, 2009 by MooglesPunk
	If it's alright (Preview) I have been very hard on myself lately. I've also been isolating. I haven't really been connecting with people. I do find myself getting lonely. I'm fed up with my ABF because he still defends a girl that tried to break us up and said such cruel hurtful things to me and threatened me. I try to explain my fee...	christinajeanne	4	544	Sep 11, 2009 by christinajeanne
	My update and lessons learned (Preview) OK Rita's wish of magic wands and combat boots sure brought something to the day! I love the saying in that card, and am thinking I could really get into the thought of visualising a sparkly pink tutu'd combat booted guardian angel, fairy or whatever she or well ... he wants to be. On to the stuff I really d...	Jennifer	8	526	Sep 10, 2009 by woopsadaisy
	Good insight (Preview) Woops said something in Jennifers thread that really spoke to me. You mention that by talking about your past with A's it opens the doors to new A's. #1 - you tell them you date A's #2 - I'm an A so I need to hide it. Wow! That's exactly what my exabf had to think. I didn't give him all the details of my lif...	Hawk120025	4	628	Sep 10, 2009 by Jennifer
	When They Get Clean (Preview) I can thank Al-Anon for giving me the courage and the tools to let my son get himself clean. He recently married and things are going well. His business status was such that while he was using, he managed not to lose everything. His credit suffered as he was late on making payments at time but somehow...	anonymiss	5	569	Sep 10, 2009 by Jen
	Enabling vs helping What about the children (Preview) My mother and I provide babysitting for my brothers family. My sister-in-law never lifts a finger to clean anything. She seldom even fixes food for the kids. My mom struggles to know when to step in and help the kids by cleaning and trying to get a meal together or if that is enabling the mother to abdicat...	smartkat	7	852	Sep 10, 2009 by smartkat
	90 day journey of self improvement... (Preview) Yesterday I embarked on a 90 day journey of self improvement. I have decided to do this to get on with my life and let go of my ex boyfriend. I am not smoking, drinking, eating carbs or seeking a relationship/sex for the next 90 days. Plus exercising every day. I'm hoping to lose 45lbs in 90 days. I am r...	carolinagirl	8	664	Sep 10, 2009 by kitty
	my share today on courage, faith, hope (Preview) This is from my share today and I was encouraged to share this with others, so Im doing just that. not feeling too prolific but i'll give it a go ;) i was very hopless for so long i was seeing & obsessing on the situations of others and ignoring my own i suffered a lot of pain & anguish mental anxi...	kitty	6	1503	Sep 9, 2009 by christinajeanne
	Ok day one of my steps to give my addiction to hp (Preview) Today I choose to not eat sugar. I may have fruit, and real 100% fruit juice. sigh, I have to. So keep doing the one day at a time, give it to hp. And put down those things I naturally grab to buy. The first step goes thru my head and it is true. Have craved it all my life. Doc just ok'ed me a gluco meter from this co...	debilyn	5	589	Sep 9, 2009 by kitty
	Why is change so bad and scary? (Preview) I am grateful that my step mother shared the wonderful world of Alanon with me. It is times like this that I feel often directionless, stressed, and pressured to be perfect. I have to make the "right choice." I am blessed with the opportunity to be able to seek new employment and have several...	MyThoughts2U2	3	572	Sep 9, 2009 by MyThoughts2U2
	teddybearpoet (Preview) So what are you up to and how are you feeling girl? I keep thinking of you and depression. It is such a hard disease and most feel it in their lives. Grief, different losses, all kinds of things, then for some reason our body cannot get back into that balance of the normal chemicals. That commercial on tv is...	debilyn	4	544	Sep 9, 2009 by teddybearpoet
	As long as there is Al=Anon...there is hope (Preview) Hi. It's been ages since I posted. ( Sorry) You've no idea how many times I have posted,and lost it,or got an error message. But I really wanted to let you all know that really,this Alanon programme is just fantastic. A brief recap on my situation............for those that don't know me. I am English,b...	chris52	4	512	Sep 9, 2009 by chris52
	Blah (Preview) I'm sad. I'm awake in the time I should be sleeping. I don't want to share which means I probably should and I don't know where to start and I really don't want to start the whole eyes leaking big fat tears and not being able to breathe properly so I am not going to. I want this whole new ABF situation clear...	Jennifer	3	638	Sep 9, 2009 by Rita G
	Seeking support in all the wrong places. (Preview) I was in a therapy group for 9 weeks. I had really hoped after the group that someone would call or email from the list we circulated. Noone has. I really don't want to be the person who organizes this because I have a great deal on my plate as it is. I feel like I am always the one who gives and I have had to t...	maresie	4	686	Sep 9, 2009 by maresie
	Will the real Alanon please stand up? (Preview) Hello Dear Friends, Lately, as I relfect on my growth in the program, I feel I am ready to face some problems that I have always encounted in alanon, and feel the need to try and find some clarity in these matters. Alanon has saved my life, in more ways than one, so this post is NOT about the merit of Alanon, o...	MaryPoppins	8	995	Sep 8, 2009 by MaryPoppins
	To New Beginnings (Preview) Well today was a very slow progress of a day, I did manage to do 3 loads of laundry even tho I have been feeling terrible... I don't know if it was something I ate or what but I have been having belly problems all evenning last night, and most of the day today... After such a wonderful weekend, it was kind of a b...	Jozie	4	688	Sep 8, 2009 by hotrod
	why am i complaining (Preview) my dh is alcoholic and also uses prescription drugs when he can get them. he is by all standards successful. owns his own business, is respected in the communitity. we live well. he pays all of the bills and i spend my paycheck the way i want. (usually on the kids or grandkids) he is never mean when h...	debhud	6	708	Sep 8, 2009 by debhud
	I feel really guilty (Preview) I have been on this forum for 7 months and it has helped me so much. but i feel quilty because i dont help others very much at least not recently..im in a different place to the one where i fel like there was no way out, wanted to die, couldnt believe it...trouble is I still cant believe it and it has for some re...	Lilly Burn	9	639	Sep 8, 2009 by blender_girl
	husband was arrested last night (Preview) he was extremely intoxicated. He snapped and started to hit me. he punched me in the chest and he twisted my arms. thankfully, another couple was here and the guy was able to get him off of me. AH then went to bed. after 10 min or so, i went to check on him with my friend. he was unconscious, his body was...	need lots of help	14	830	Sep 8, 2009 by neshema2
	We're Seperated (Preview) Hello Everyone! After many days of fussing and fighting and saying i wanted to move out and so on..i just had enough. Last Friday night, I begged him to leave. I called a friend of his and told him that I am serious and I needed his help. I needed a witness to what I was about to tell him, cause he (my A) thou...	Sincerely	9	741	Sep 8, 2009 by neshema2
	Question (Preview) I have heard alot lately about the book getting them sober by toby rice. i was just wondering if this book is a good read for families of recovery alcoholics or if it focuses on the active alcoholic. any feedback would be greatly appreciated. Tara	TF	6	523	Sep 8, 2009 by canadianguy
	control of self (Preview) I have notice a lot lately how I react to what ever environment I am in or what people I am surrounded by. My boss talks about others, critising, judging I dont want to hear it but I am trying to be polite and I feel obliged to engage in the conversation. I always try and get her to see that other persons good p...	Tracy	7	1854	Sep 8, 2009 by woopsadaisy
	Your support (Preview) I am overwhelmed with all the people who took time to read my "lost" post. Also to all the ones who responded. I was so afraid my integrity was ruined but you all showed me the truth. It has been a HUGE lesson! thank you! Next time someone attacks my person, as we know in this world it happens too m...	debilyn	4	488	Sep 8, 2009 by neshema2
	Getting to the nitty gritty. (Preview) I'm two years out from leaving the A. In fact this weekend is the 2nd anniverary of my taking the dogs from him. That was one of the parts of severing the tie. For me there was a long long road to leaving. The leaving went on long after I had left. In fact in so many ways I am still leaving that relationship...	maresie	5	618	Sep 8, 2009 by maresie
	Happy Recovery Birthday to ME!!! (Preview) 5 years ago today - I walked into my first Al-Anon meeting. Scared, unsure of why I was going and how in the world could this thing called Al-Anon help me. I just knew that at that time in my life, I was separated from my husband, he was 6 months sober and I was still miserable, angry and wanting something to c...	Rita G	12	629	Sep 8, 2009 by Rita G
	One Year On (Preview) Dear (((((All)))) Today is my MIP 1st birthday I dont recall how I found this place, I was distraught and my life had become unmanagble, obviously my HP brought me here. The one thing I do remember clearly is the feeling I got from the welcome I received. The responses to my original posts where amazin...	Mariner	8	573	Sep 7, 2009 by Suzannah
	New member In need of advice (Preview) Hi, I just signed up so this is my first post. My father has been fighting all sorts of addictions his whole life. He is on MMT and he continues to drink hard alcohol daily. He has been to rehab 3 times and says he will never go back. I live 30 minutes from my parents house and am at the point where I refu...	stigirl	8	671	Sep 7, 2009 by abbyal
	Prayer for depression (Preview) Some of you know I have had problems with depression for many years.. And have gone to the hospital for it as well.. The last couple of weeks I am back there.. I have talked to some in the room.. Ever shared about not being in a good place right now in meetings and in chat.. Friday i spoke to the doc and we are ho...	teddybearpoet	12	721	Sep 7, 2009 by teddybearpoet
	A newbie share.. (Preview) When I first came to al-anon, I could not even meet the eyes of the people in the room. I cried silently, in fear, and had so much resentment for even being there. I hit bottom. We talk about A's hitting bottom. I hit mine. At the time I hit the al-anon doorsteps, I didn't recognize who I had become. LI...	Inpain	4	538	Sep 7, 2009 by Peggy7
	Looking for insight & ESH... (Preview) Ok, So here the last couple of days I have been doin some much needed soul searching, and it came to me from a Loving Friend, that I Love others with an open heart, but... Myself... Not so much... I was not offended by this, by no means... but it did bring up somethings that I just never thought about... I alw...	Jozie	2	570	Sep 6, 2009 by maresie
	A-lAnon Killing our Relatioship (Update) (Preview) Went to my first meeting yesterday and OH Boy. I have/had no idea. I guess that most of us outsiders had no idea what a different life members lead. I got up explained my dilemma then listened to others talk, some were just like me when they started others were just like my girlfriend is/was. One thing I n...	Moe	11	838	Sep 6, 2009 by Tracy
	Does it ever just go away?? Completely?? In need of ESH...... (Preview) I have been seeing a great guy for the past 2 mths. We have been going really slowly-at my request and his understanding of where I am, and where I have been, but the past two weeks I can see more in him than I wanted to see. He has so many good qualitites and seems genuine. He does drink on occassion but no...	shellyj123	7	795	Sep 5, 2009 by Tenderheartsks
	Happy Labor Day weekend! (Preview) ((((Family))), Just wanted to wish you all who are here in the States a HAPPY LABOR DAY weekend. Enjoy the last traditional weekend of summer. I hope you get the kiddies off to school without loosing your mind! I have seen the glazed look on the parents' faces when they come in to buy sneakers. I hope...	Karilynn	4	515	Sep 4, 2009 by bubbles1990
	Thank you. (Preview) Thank you to everyone to prayed for me last night. I went into the night with one situation in my mind making me VERY anxious. That situation turned out great. My A had strength last night. I know I can't expect anything for the future, but I am grateful for last night. It was interesting though becaus...	Inpain	1	458	Sep 4, 2009 by bubbles1990
	Taking Back Control of My Home (Preview) Hello Friends, Thank you for all the wonderful advice. I took my daughter and her boyfriend to lunch today. I simple let it fly, I told my daughter that I love her and I will support her and her daughter until she finishes school. That promise I made to her 2 yrs ago and I intend to keep it. After all you a...	Andrea12	12	712	Sep 4, 2009 by maresie
	Hi everyone. This is my first time here. Can I live like this and be happy? (Preview) I am 36 and have been married for 14 years. My husband and I have 1 teenage daughter. My husband is an alcoholic. I have just recently realized that - yes he is one. I can't go to Alanon meetings locally because of the time that the group meets and I can't keep going like I am with out help. I have alwa...	Dazzlingirl329	9	660	Sep 4, 2009 by maresie
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.