Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

maresie · maresie

At the end of my relationship with the ex A I was absolutely over responsible for him and totally under responsible for myself. My desire to connect with others often means I blur the line with what I need to do to take care of myself. As I've said a number of times taking care of me is really foreign to me....

Ness · Ness

I have a burning shoulder pain, almost constant, and it varies in severity ...good day, slow burn...bad day, cattle prod territoryMy daughter is currently undergoing training as a volunteer in addiction recovery support and tissue issues was the topic today....my shoulder is a known 'living wit...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

Well I made it through a sleepless, sick night (think I am getting a bug again) and woke up with about 2-3hrs pf total sleep. I called EXBF last night and told him if we were done that he was going to be man enough and tell me from his lips to my ear-via the WWW was unacceptable to me. So he called and left me a vo...

woopsadaisy · woopsadaisy

This is the start of step 4. I wrote this in my step 3 post reposonse. Since writing it, I see more and more *S* I have done. Feeling kinda crappy at the moment. But I also know I need to do this. there is no other way, unless someone forced me, which no one will. So... I am forcing myself. I don't want to beat mys...

MyThoughts2U2 · MyThoughts2U2

How does sponsorship work in this group?

shellyj123 · shellyj123

The weekend started out well, but ended with a BANG! The new man I had been seeing for the past two months and I went to my son's game Sat morning, his daughter's game Sat afternoon, then to DQ. We met later that night at his house and left for a movie-our first "real" date without kids. Movie...

Jennifer · Jennifer

I've been thinking today about being alone. Lots of people are really scared of being alone. I'm not, don't get me wrong I would love to have people or in particular a special person in my life but it seems like every time I find someone I want to have emotional intimacy with besides my family I change into...

MyThoughts2U2 · MyThoughts2U2

How do you know what is your HP's plan and will for you when prayer and meditation does not provide answers?

kat777 · kat777

hi, I am a first time poster, hope I am doing this right. From the age of 16, until I was 40 years old I lived with my husband who is an alcoholic. We married when I was 20, had 3 children in 5 years. He was a hard worker, a good provider, and everyone,s friend. If you met him you would like him, he was fun and charm...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

FRUSTRATION, GUILT BUT TAKING CARE OF ME WHEN IT COMES TO MY MOTHER. SHE GOT TO ME YESTERDAY & I LET HER! LAST SATURDAY I MENTIONED THAT SHE WANTED ME TO GO WITH HER SOMEWHERE & I SAID NO. SUNDAY I WAS ALL BENT OUT OF SHAPE WHILE WE ATTENDED A MEETING BEFORE & AFTERWARDS. YESTERDAY I TOLD HER...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

So last night I get home and my best friend texts me... Says the ex bf came thru her line at walmart just now and told her to tell me hi and to come by tomorrow for a donut (he works at krispy kreme). So I go to my pta meeting... good place to meet normal people :D and then call her and talk during a long walk. I g...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

I am on day 8 of the journey of self improvement, finished the first book and going to re-read the highlights and do some of the exercises in there. I have been doing the diet like a diet nazi and exercising in some form every day (this weekend was walking on the beach and boogie boarding). I have lost 6 po...

Sincerely · Sincerely

Hello Everyone, Its a lil over 2 weeks since my husband moved out. I feel so much peace inside my heart. I get lonely, but i was lonely when he was here. I get sad because it didn't work out between us, but i got sad when he was here and was drunk. I get nervous about my future and what it may hold for me, but i...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

Hello Friends, Well the shat hit the fan as some of you know was having some problems with daughters boyfriend...well the other day he was drunk...yuk....was going to drive....him and my son got into a fist fight because son was not going to let him drive drunk it was awful....his friend finally came a...

woopsadaisy · woopsadaisy

Can I get some feedback on Step 3 and how to work it? What did you do for this step? I feel like I want to be able to write something down about it (was in school too long, probably feel like I need to hand in my homework now). And step 4 too. I can read the book, and understand the concepts-- but what do they LOOK l...

maresie · maresie

A month ago I had a check stolen. I am going through absolute hell to get it replaced. Please send your prayers that I will make it through this incredibly difficult process. I need patience, faith and endurance to keep on with so many obstacles in my way. Maresie.

woopsadaisy · woopsadaisy

I went to my first F2F meeting tonight, and I have to say that it was awesome. Such nice people there. I am encouraged by the women there who are still married to their husbands and seem to be happy. O, serenity! What a seredipity that I found it! I'm not worried about my STBAH. He's going to be just fine, or h...

Bounce · Bounce

Hi, I'm new. I've known my husband 16 years, married for 11 years, we have four children 10yo and younger. He's been an alcoholic for many (probably all) of those years. I asked him to move out in August. He refused. I started the process of divorce to force him to leave. He up and checks into detox an...

leerose52 · leerose52

My son is a drug user 23 yearsold and home,not alcohol...wondering if this site will be helpful....should I try something else, very painful...right now Iam unable to get to meetings,recent sugery.My most difficult thing right now...trying to let go, cant control it but its breaking my heart!! H...

andica · andica

Happy Labor Day I am sitting here at my husbands desk on his computer, thinking back over the last several months. Its quiet in the house, just me and the baby (he's 2) are up right now. For those who don't remember me, my AH passed away from liver and kidney failure at age 36, on May 20 of this year. I haven't...

Karilynn · Karilynn

((((Family)))), As many of you know my brother in law was arressted for making meth this week. As he sits in jail w/o bail, my sister is hysterical. I have tried for many years to get her into Alanon, but to no avail. This week has drained me. I'm am going back to Step 1 with a few changes. I am powerless...

Wanton · Wanton

Hi all, new here. Just looking for some support and advice. Some history... I have been divorced almost 2 years now and my short marriage was hell. My XAH was verbally abusive to both myself and my son who was very young at the time. My XAH was not serious about getting help at all and even slept with so...

david62 · david62

Hello ((((Family))))) I was at the East Texas Area AWSC meeting yesterday representing my home district. Our Area Delegate passed on some information to me which I did not know about that I would like to share with you all. She told us that our Al-Anon monthly magazing "The Forum" is in ver...

chezza · chezza

well it has been a very hard few weeks for me from meeting my sponsor for the first time to chat and now made a complete connection by braving my first phone call to her. I have always found it hard to trust anyone to open up and this now feels so natural. I feel so lucky to have this program and the magnifican...

blender_girl · blender_girl

I shared on this the other day during a meeting and wanted to post my thoughts on it here as well. I've been doing a lot of thinking lately along the lines of examining what drives me crazy about other people in my life and the notion that this may be because it's something I don't like about myself. And in...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I HAVE BEEN SO BUSY LATELY THAT I HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE TO CATCH UP ON THIS SITE! I HAVE BEEN DOING PRETTY WELL. HAD A COUPLE ROUGH NITES A FEW DAYS AGO BUT I AM A SURVIVOR & I AM BACK ON TRACK. TODAY IS A GOOD DAY--I AM NOT GOING TO LET MY MOTHER CONTROL ME TODAY. I PURPOSELY WAITED TO COME DOWN HERE TO GET ON THI...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hi family, I am ready to share what has been happening in my life. My husbands disease has taken full control over him and he has been going further and further into his disease for a while now. I have been struggling with asking him to leave or not. What is best for the kids and I was a fight in my head and hear...

smartkat · smartkat

I don't mean the ones we all know from AlAnon. I mean like "Put down the magnifying glass and pick up the mirror." That one struck me because I have a real tendency to read the ODAAT with a mindset of what my brother could learn from a reading in dealing with his wife and kids. It takes a bit for m...

Diva · Diva

He is drunk. 6 day binge and not showing any signs of coming off it. He is determined to die, and he is doing a great job of seeing that come about. He cannot eat without throwing up, is losing weight, and just keeps drinking...not fussy about his liquor. Gin, vodka, beer, wine; anything will do. Al...

StargazerLily · StargazerLily

My mom and dad took in roommates earlier this year. They needed extra money. Of course giving up the Captain Morgans was not an option. They took in a homeless couple they knew nothing about. Fast forward to now. The roommates are crazy and made up a story about my parents to have them arrested. My mom cal...

Hawk120025 · Hawk120025

Today has been a tough day. It's been 6 weeks since breaking up with my abf. I've learned alot and progressed in my recovery, but today has been difficult. Today, in fact, I've been questioning my decision to break up with him. I did so because I did not want to be on the receiving end of his alcoholi...

debilyn · debilyn

The first night no sugar was hard. I cannot even imagine someone quitting smoking and or using. My mood has been great though. Today was not hard at all. Had a feeling and drove up and saw my AH. He told me he had been so depressed for a few days. So that is what I felt. I feel him when he is not using. When he uses...

Gailey · Gailey

I don't think I posted this....my dil is pregnant. She and my son have been trying for 7 years. She had IVF 2 times and was planning on having it again this month. While my son was deployed and was in Perth, Austrailia she flew there from Japan and spent a week with him. Low and behold....she got pregnant. W...

artsyinnj · artsyinnj

Hi everyone, I came to these boards because I don't know where else to start. I'll try to give a concise background. It may be biased as this is how I perceived everything. My boyfriend and I worked for the same company. I am 30, and he is 36. We became friendly in April 2008 and started dating in August...

Diva · Diva

A has been drunk, and most of the time passed out, for the past four days. And what about me? I've been SHOPPING! Clothes, shoes, purses, scarfs, coats. I am going for the complete new wardrobe. WOW! What fun. No need for me to whine and cry over his situation. Actually, peeps, I am really enjoy...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

For those of you who have followed my story from last August on....here is where I find myself today.... I'm still working the program and am in the process of beginning my second round through the steps (not sure if this will be with or without a sponsor but I am determined it needs to and will be done agai...

Karilynn · Karilynn

(((((Family)))), On this day September 11 may we remember those lives lost. May we remember the many Alanon family members who are grieving for their family & friends. May we honor their memories with a simple act of kindness. May we offer prayers for all on this day. Much love and blessings...

smartkat · smartkat

(Asking questions on behalf of my mother because she doesnt have the internet) My mom watches the kids when my brother is at work and my sister-in-law needs to go to a meeting. When my mom goes over there in time for my SIL to make a meeting, Mom often finds the special needs child in her bedroom covered in...

Karilynn · Karilynn

((((Family))), Well it finally happened. My brother in law was arrested at a meth lab. He was cooking up a batch when the police raided it. He's sitting in jail with no bail. More charges are pending. This was only a matter of time. Five years ago the family garage burnt down. The police had no p...

danz123 · danz123

September 13 Business Meeting Agenda I. Review of August minutes II.Review of op meeting schedule III.New Business Chat Room Security Please pm me if you have any additional items. hugs, danz

Rora · Rora

I've read on this board that if you are doing something for another, whom has the time, ability and facility to do it for themselves, then you are engaging in enabling behaviour. I agree. I've had the opportunity to set a different boundary with my ex-aH recently and though I know it is the right thing,...

Overcome · Overcome

It's been just two and a half weeks since the divorce and I am losing it! I am not able to concentrate on anything and I am not motivated to do anything. I have company coming this weekend and I just can't get myself in gear to clean house, do laundry, fix meals, just the everyday things that must be done. I ha...

N8SMOM · N8SMOM

Over 2 weeks ago my husband got suspended from work for refusing to take a drug/alcohol test. He told me that his company offered to let him keep his job if he enters a drug/alcohol program that lasts 5 years. It's the same program that the Board of Pharmacy uses and he'll probably have to enter it anyway...

Sincerely · Sincerely

Hello and Hugs Everyone! Tomorrow will be two weeks since my husband moved out. HURRAY! Today is day two of his at home detox. He called me a few times and tried to use me as a punching bag, but guess what....he missed...he never landed those punches...i'm too quick you see...i saw them coming and i go...

MooglesPunk · MooglesPunk

Since I started attending meetings, I have noticed that I have had massive emotional outpourings. I remember the night after my very first meeting and sharing, I was talking online to my partner (long distance relationships, different countries - we met for 3 weeks in July and it was truly fantastic...

Katy · Katy

Change to the fearful, chage is threatening, because it might mean that things may get worse, to the hopeful change is encouraging beacause things might get better, to the confident change is inspiring, because the challenge exists to make things better. katy x

christinajeanne · christinajeanne

today was a hectic day and I'm exhausted but it was not as bad as I thought it would be. I made it through the day unscathed and not abused by my aunt. I actually told her I was in school because I thought I want to tell people what's going on and maybe she will also get the message I'm getting ready to move on. I'...

angelchar375 · angelchar375

Reading the passage this morning in Courage to Change for Aug 4th, I am reminded that through my self care, I am slowly finding my self worth. Part of my self care has been my dedication to touch base with my program daily! I made this dedication only a few months back and already I see a huge change within m...

christinajeanne · christinajeanne

I have been very hard on myself lately. I've also been isolating. I haven't really been connecting with people. I do find myself getting lonely. I'm fed up with my ABF because he still defends a girl that tried to break us up and said such cruel hurtful things to me and threatened me. I try to explain my fee...

Jennifer · Jennifer

OK Rita's wish of magic wands and combat boots sure brought something to the day! I love the saying in that card, and am thinking I could really get into the thought of visualising a sparkly pink tutu'd combat booted guardian angel, fairy or whatever she or well ... he wants to be. On to the stuff I really d...

Hawk120025 · Hawk120025

Woops said something in Jennifers thread that really spoke to me. You mention that by talking about your past with A's it opens the doors to new A's. #1 - you tell them you date A's #2 - I'm an A so I need to hide it. Wow! That's exactly what my exabf had to think. I didn't give him all the details of my lif...

anonymiss · anonymiss

I can thank Al-Anon for giving me the courage and the tools to let my son get himself clean. He recently married and things are going well. His business status was such that while he was using, he managed not to lose everything. His credit suffered as he was late on making payments at time but somehow...

smartkat · smartkat

My mother and I provide babysitting for my brothers family. My sister-in-law never lifts a finger to clean anything. She seldom even fixes food for the kids. My mom struggles to know when to step in and help the kids by cleaning and trying to get a meal together or if that is enabling the mother to abdicat...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Yesterday I embarked on a 90 day journey of self improvement. I have decided to do this to get on with my life and let go of my ex boyfriend. I am not smoking, drinking, eating carbs or seeking a relationship/sex for the next 90 days. Plus exercising every day. I'm hoping to lose 45lbs in 90 days. I am r...

kitty · kitty

This is from my share today and I was encouraged to share this with others, so Im doing just that. not feeling too prolific but i'll give it a go ;) i was very hopless for so long i was seeing & obsessing on the situations of others and ignoring my own i suffered a lot of pain & anguish mental anxi...

debilyn · debilyn

Today I choose to not eat sugar. I may have fruit, and real 100% fruit juice. sigh, I have to. So keep doing the one day at a time, give it to hp. And put down those things I naturally grab to buy. The first step goes thru my head and it is true. Have craved it all my life. Doc just ok'ed me a gluco meter from this co...

MyThoughts2U2 · MyThoughts2U2

I am grateful that my step mother shared the wonderful world of Alanon with me. It is times like this that I feel often directionless, stressed, and pressured to be perfect. I have to make the "right choice." I am blessed with the opportunity to be able to seek new employment and have several...

debilyn · debilyn

So what are you up to and how are you feeling girl? I keep thinking of you and depression. It is such a hard disease and most feel it in their lives. Grief, different losses, all kinds of things, then for some reason our body cannot get back into that balance of the normal chemicals. That commercial on tv is...

chris52 · chris52

Hi. It's been ages since I posted. ( Sorry) You've no idea how many times I have posted,and lost it,or got an error message. But I really wanted to let you all know that really,this Alanon programme is just fantastic. A brief recap on my situation............for those that don't know me. I am English,b...

Jennifer · Jennifer

I'm sad. I'm awake in the time I should be sleeping. I don't want to share which means I probably should and I don't know where to start and I really don't want to start the whole eyes leaking big fat tears and not being able to breathe properly so I am not going to. I want this whole new ABF situation clear...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Over responsibility and under responsibility. (Preview) At the end of my relationship with the ex A I was absolutely over responsible for him and totally under responsible for myself. My desire to connect with others often means I blur the line with what I need to do to take care of myself. As I've said a number of times taking care of me is really foreign to me....	maresie	3	536	Sep 17, 2009 by maresie
	Tissue Issues.......aches and pains....OUCH (Preview) I have a burning shoulder pain, almost constant, and it varies in severity ...good day, slow burn...bad day, cattle prod territoryMy daughter is currently undergoing training as a volunteer in addiction recovery support and tissue issues was the topic today....my shoulder is a known 'living wit...	Ness	3	591	Sep 17, 2009 by Mariner
	A new day~~~~update from yesterday's mess (Preview) Well I made it through a sleepless, sick night (think I am getting a bug again) and woke up with about 2-3hrs pf total sleep. I called EXBF last night and told him if we were done that he was going to be man enough and tell me from his lips to my ear-via the WWW was unacceptable to me. So he called and left me a vo...	shellyj123	7	565	Sep 16, 2009 by barisax
	brutal- honesty and feelings (Preview) This is the start of step 4. I wrote this in my step 3 post reposonse. Since writing it, I see more and more S I have done. Feeling kinda crappy at the moment. But I also know I need to do this. there is no other way, unless someone forced me, which no one will. So... I am forcing myself. I don't want to beat mys...	woopsadaisy	6	841	Sep 16, 2009 by woopsadaisy
	Sponsorship (Preview) How does sponsorship work in this group?	MyThoughts2U2	1	401	Sep 16, 2009 by rtexas
	Feeling really down and hurt right now.....in need of some ESH (Preview) The weekend started out well, but ended with a BANG! The new man I had been seeing for the past two months and I went to my son's game Sat morning, his daughter's game Sat afternoon, then to DQ. We met later that night at his house and left for a movie-our first "real" date without kids. Movie...	shellyj123	10	930	Sep 16, 2009 by maresie
	Thoughts on being alone,past/present, fears (Preview) I've been thinking today about being alone. Lots of people are really scared of being alone. I'm not, don't get me wrong I would love to have people or in particular a special person in my life but it seems like every time I find someone I want to have emotional intimacy with besides my family I change into...	Jennifer	5	621	Sep 16, 2009 by maresie
	How do you know HP's will for you? (Preview) How do you know what is your HP's plan and will for you when prayer and meditation does not provide answers?	MyThoughts2U2	8	636	Sep 16, 2009 by MyThoughts2U2
	hi, I am a first time poster, hope I am doing this right. (Preview) hi, I am a first time poster, hope I am doing this right. From the age of 16, until I was 40 years old I lived with my husband who is an alcoholic. We married when I was 20, had 3 children in 5 years. He was a hard worker, a good provider, and everyone,s friend. If you met him you would like him, he was fun and charm...	kat777	8	702	Sep 16, 2009 by chezza
	Saying no to Mom! (Preview) FRUSTRATION, GUILT BUT TAKING CARE OF ME WHEN IT COMES TO MY MOTHER. SHE GOT TO ME YESTERDAY & I LET HER! LAST SATURDAY I MENTIONED THAT SHE WANTED ME TO GO WITH HER SOMEWHERE & I SAID NO. SUNDAY I WAS ALL BENT OUT OF SHAPE WHILE WE ATTENDED A MEETING BEFORE & AFTERWARDS. YESTERDAY I TOLD HER...	Hoot Nanny	4	647	Sep 16, 2009 by Jozie
	I think I'm better (Preview) So last night I get home and my best friend texts me... Says the ex bf came thru her line at walmart just now and told her to tell me hi and to come by tomorrow for a donut (he works at krispy kreme). So I go to my pta meeting... good place to meet normal people :D and then call her and talk during a long walk. I g...	carolinagirl	8	636	Sep 16, 2009 by Jozie
	Update... (Preview) I am on day 8 of the journey of self improvement, finished the first book and going to re-read the highlights and do some of the exercises in there. I have been doing the diet like a diet nazi and exercising in some form every day (this weekend was walking on the beach and boogie boarding). I have lost 6 po...	carolinagirl	11	583	Sep 16, 2009 by carolinagirl
	...this feeling is incredible...... (Preview) Hello Everyone, Its a lil over 2 weeks since my husband moved out. I feel so much peace inside my heart. I get lonely, but i was lonely when he was here. I get sad because it didn't work out between us, but i got sad when he was here and was drunk. I get nervous about my future and what it may hold for me, but i...	Sincerely	6	607	Sep 16, 2009 by blender_girl
	Not ready to let her go (Preview) Hello Friends, Well the shat hit the fan as some of you know was having some problems with daughters boyfriend...well the other day he was drunk...yuk....was going to drive....him and my son got into a fist fight because son was not going to let him drive drunk it was awful....his friend finally came a...	Andrea12	9	598	Sep 15, 2009 by maresie
	Step 3 (Preview) Can I get some feedback on Step 3 and how to work it? What did you do for this step? I feel like I want to be able to write something down about it (was in school too long, probably feel like I need to hand in my homework now). And step 4 too. I can read the book, and understand the concepts-- but what do they LOOK l...	woopsadaisy	4	1541	Sep 15, 2009 by woopsadaisy
	prayers please (Preview) A month ago I had a check stolen. I am going through absolute hell to get it replaced. Please send your prayers that I will make it through this incredibly difficult process. I need patience, faith and endurance to keep on with so many obstacles in my way. Maresie.	maresie	12	720	Sep 15, 2009 by maresie
	take away from first f2f meeting. (Preview) I went to my first F2F meeting tonight, and I have to say that it was awesome. Such nice people there. I am encouraged by the women there who are still married to their husbands and seem to be happy. O, serenity! What a seredipity that I found it! I'm not worried about my STBAH. He's going to be just fine, or h...	woopsadaisy	3	656	Sep 15, 2009 by woopsadaisy
	What now? (Preview) Hi, I'm new. I've known my husband 16 years, married for 11 years, we have four children 10yo and younger. He's been an alcoholic for many (probably all) of those years. I asked him to move out in August. He refused. I started the process of divorce to force him to leave. He up and checks into detox an...	Bounce	6	616	Sep 15, 2009 by Bounce
	any advice (Preview) My son is a drug user 23 yearsold and home,not alcohol...wondering if this site will be helpful....should I try something else, very painful...right now Iam unable to get to meetings,recent sugery.My most difficult thing right now...trying to let go, cant control it but its breaking my heart!! H...	leerose52	2	546	Sep 15, 2009 by Christy
	Hi everyone... it's been awhile (Preview) Happy Labor Day I am sitting here at my husbands desk on his computer, thinking back over the last several months. Its quiet in the house, just me and the baby (he's 2) are up right now. For those who don't remember me, my AH passed away from liver and kidney failure at age 36, on May 20 of this year. I haven't...	andica	8	636	Sep 14, 2009 by andica
	Detaching (Preview) ((((Family)))), As many of you know my brother in law was arressted for making meth this week. As he sits in jail w/o bail, my sister is hysterical. I have tried for many years to get her into Alanon, but to no avail. This week has drained me. I'm am going back to Step 1 with a few changes. I am powerless...	Karilynn	7	1615	Sep 14, 2009 by tea2
	Dating a Recovering A (Preview) Hi all, new here. Just looking for some support and advice. Some history... I have been divorced almost 2 years now and my short marriage was hell. My XAH was verbally abusive to both myself and my son who was very young at the time. My XAH was not serious about getting help at all and even slept with so...	Wanton	6	623	Sep 14, 2009 by Wanton
	Please Help keep The Forum helping people (Preview) Hello ((((Family))))) I was at the East Texas Area AWSC meeting yesterday representing my home district. Our Area Delegate passed on some information to me which I did not know about that I would like to share with you all. She told us that our Al-Anon monthly magazing "The Forum" is in ver...	david62	3	681	Sep 14, 2009 by Gailey
	My step journey so far (Preview) well it has been a very hard few weeks for me from meeting my sponsor for the first time to chat and now made a complete connection by braving my first phone call to her. I have always found it hard to trust anyone to open up and this now feels so natural. I feel so lucky to have this program and the magnifican...	chezza	1	482	Sep 14, 2009 by kitty
	Slight Shift in Perspective (Preview) I shared on this the other day during a meeting and wanted to post my thoughts on it here as well. I've been doing a lot of thinking lately along the lines of examining what drives me crazy about other people in my life and the notion that this may be because it's something I don't like about myself. And in...	blender_girl	4	588	Sep 14, 2009 by chezza
	REMEMBERING TO KEEP IN TOUCH! (Preview) I HAVE BEEN SO BUSY LATELY THAT I HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE TO CATCH UP ON THIS SITE! I HAVE BEEN DOING PRETTY WELL. HAD A COUPLE ROUGH NITES A FEW DAYS AGO BUT I AM A SURVIVOR & I AM BACK ON TRACK. TODAY IS A GOOD DAY--I AM NOT GOING TO LET MY MOTHER CONTROL ME TODAY. I PURPOSELY WAITED TO COME DOWN HERE TO GET ON THI...	Hoot Nanny	3	658	Sep 14, 2009 by Mandy123
	It works if you work it. (Preview) Hi family, I am ready to share what has been happening in my life. My husbands disease has taken full control over him and he has been going further and further into his disease for a while now. I have been struggling with asking him to leave or not. What is best for the kids and I was a fight in my head and hear...	Mandy123	6	650	Sep 14, 2009 by babysteps
	What are your favorite personal slogans? (Preview) I don't mean the ones we all know from AlAnon. I mean like "Put down the magnifying glass and pick up the mirror." That one struck me because I have a real tendency to read the ODAAT with a mindset of what my brother could learn from a reading in dealing with his wife and kids. It takes a bit for m...	smartkat	17	2334	Sep 13, 2009 by Jennifer
	Where's the miracle here? (Preview) He is drunk. 6 day binge and not showing any signs of coming off it. He is determined to die, and he is doing a great job of seeing that come about. He cannot eat without throwing up, is losing weight, and just keeps drinking...not fussy about his liquor. Gin, vodka, beer, wine; anything will do. Al...	Diva	20	1029	Sep 13, 2009 by Ness
	My A's are acting up (Preview) My mom and dad took in roommates earlier this year. They needed extra money. Of course giving up the Captain Morgans was not an option. They took in a homeless couple they knew nothing about. Fast forward to now. The roommates are crazy and made up a story about my parents to have them arrested. My mom cal...	StargazerLily	2	591	Sep 13, 2009 by RunnerChick
	Questioning my decision.....send in the reinforcements.... (Preview) Today has been a tough day. It's been 6 weeks since breaking up with my abf. I've learned alot and progressed in my recovery, but today has been difficult. Today, in fact, I've been questioning my decision to break up with him. I did so because I did not want to be on the receiving end of his alcoholi...	Hawk120025	9	716	Sep 12, 2009 by lonewolfmama
	Little update (Preview) The first night no sugar was hard. I cannot even imagine someone quitting smoking and or using. My mood has been great though. Today was not hard at all. Had a feeling and drove up and saw my AH. He told me he had been so depressed for a few days. So that is what I felt. I feel him when he is not using. When he uses...	debilyn	5	649	Sep 12, 2009 by Jennifer
	very exciting news (Preview) I don't think I posted this....my dil is pregnant. She and my son have been trying for 7 years. She had IVF 2 times and was planning on having it again this month. While my son was deployed and was in Perth, Austrailia she flew there from Japan and spent a week with him. Low and behold....she got pregnant. W...	Gailey	10	575	Sep 12, 2009 by Peggy7
	New here - my story (Preview) Hi everyone, I came to these boards because I don't know where else to start. I'll try to give a concise background. It may be biased as this is how I perceived everything. My boyfriend and I worked for the same company. I am 30, and he is 36. We became friendly in April 2008 and started dating in August...	artsyinnj	9	707	Sep 12, 2009 by Mattie
	I LOVE the shopping! (Preview) A has been drunk, and most of the time passed out, for the past four days. And what about me? I've been SHOPPING! Clothes, shoes, purses, scarfs, coats. I am going for the complete new wardrobe. WOW! What fun. No need for me to whine and cry over his situation. Actually, peeps, I am really enjoy...	Diva	7	586	Sep 12, 2009 by Karilynn
	Can I ever have a "normal" relationship w/someone who drinks "normally" ESH needed (Preview) For those of you who have followed my story from last August on....here is where I find myself today.... I'm still working the program and am in the process of beginning my second round through the steps (not sure if this will be with or without a sponsor but I am determined it needs to and will be done agai...	shellyj123	5	858	Sep 12, 2009 by Rora
	We remember& honor (Preview) (((((Family)))), On this day September 11 may we remember those lives lost. May we remember the many Alanon family members who are grieving for their family & friends. May we honor their memories with a simple act of kindness. May we offer prayers for all on this day. Much love and blessings...	Karilynn	6	675	Sep 11, 2009 by Diva
	A grandmother's specific problem with special needs child and an alcoholic 'mother.' (Preview) (Asking questions on behalf of my mother because she doesnt have the internet) My mom watches the kids when my brother is at work and my sister-in-law needs to go to a meeting. When my mom goes over there in time for my SIL to make a meeting, Mom often finds the special needs child in her bedroom covered in...	smartkat	5	667	Sep 11, 2009 by smartkat
	Arrested. (Preview) ((((Family))), Well it finally happened. My brother in law was arrested at a meth lab. He was cooking up a batch when the police raided it. He's sitting in jail with no bail. More charges are pending. This was only a matter of time. Five years ago the family garage burnt down. The police had no p...	Karilynn	11	743	Sep 11, 2009 by wp
	September Business meeting Agenda (Preview) September 13 Business Meeting Agenda I. Review of August minutes II.Review of op meeting schedule III.New Business Chat Room Security Please pm me if you have any additional items. hugs, danz	danz123	0	625	Sep 11, 2009 by danz123
	Detaching...unleashing myself from the viscious grips of enabling behaviour... (Preview) I've read on this board that if you are doing something for another, whom has the time, ability and facility to do it for themselves, then you are engaging in enabling behaviour. I agree. I've had the opportunity to set a different boundary with my ex-aH recently and though I know it is the right thing,...	Rora	4	862	Sep 11, 2009 by Mandy123
	Why am I losing it? (Preview) It's been just two and a half weeks since the divorce and I am losing it! I am not able to concentrate on anything and I am not motivated to do anything. I have company coming this weekend and I just can't get myself in gear to clean house, do laundry, fix meals, just the everyday things that must be done. I ha...	Overcome	10	723	Sep 11, 2009 by maresie
	Overwhelmed Yet Again (Preview) Over 2 weeks ago my husband got suspended from work for refusing to take a drug/alcohol test. He told me that his company offered to let him keep his job if he enters a drug/alcohol program that lasts 5 years. It's the same program that the Board of Pharmacy uses and he'll probably have to enter it anyway...	N8SMOM	6	594	Sep 11, 2009 by maresie
	He threw a punch and missed!!!!! (Preview) Hello and Hugs Everyone! Tomorrow will be two weeks since my husband moved out. HURRAY! Today is day two of his at home detox. He called me a few times and tried to use me as a punching bag, but guess what....he missed...he never landed those punches...i'm too quick you see...i saw them coming and i go...	Sincerely	6	598	Sep 11, 2009 by maresie
	Constant abrupt change of emotions.. Highs to Lows and back again (Preview) Since I started attending meetings, I have noticed that I have had massive emotional outpourings. I remember the night after my very first meeting and sharing, I was talking online to my partner (long distance relationships, different countries - we met for 3 weeks in July and it was truly fantastic...	MooglesPunk	2	1597	Sep 11, 2009 by kitty
	Change! (Preview) Change to the fearful, chage is threatening, because it might mean that things may get worse, to the hopeful change is encouraging beacause things might get better, to the confident change is inspiring, because the challenge exists to make things better. katy x	Katy	1	529	Sep 11, 2009 by MooglesPunk
	It's alright, It's OK (Preview) today was a hectic day and I'm exhausted but it was not as bad as I thought it would be. I made it through the day unscathed and not abused by my aunt. I actually told her I was in school because I thought I want to tell people what's going on and maybe she will also get the message I'm getting ready to move on. I'...	christinajeanne	0	377	Sep 11, 2009 by christinajeanne
	Self Worth - Courage to Change 8/4 (Preview) Reading the passage this morning in Courage to Change for Aug 4th, I am reminded that through my self care, I am slowly finding my self worth. Part of my self care has been my dedication to touch base with my program daily! I made this dedication only a few months back and already I see a huge change within m...	angelchar375	2	635	Sep 11, 2009 by MooglesPunk
	If it's alright (Preview) I have been very hard on myself lately. I've also been isolating. I haven't really been connecting with people. I do find myself getting lonely. I'm fed up with my ABF because he still defends a girl that tried to break us up and said such cruel hurtful things to me and threatened me. I try to explain my fee...	christinajeanne	4	575	Sep 11, 2009 by christinajeanne
	My update and lessons learned (Preview) OK Rita's wish of magic wands and combat boots sure brought something to the day! I love the saying in that card, and am thinking I could really get into the thought of visualising a sparkly pink tutu'd combat booted guardian angel, fairy or whatever she or well ... he wants to be. On to the stuff I really d...	Jennifer	8	562	Sep 10, 2009 by woopsadaisy
	Good insight (Preview) Woops said something in Jennifers thread that really spoke to me. You mention that by talking about your past with A's it opens the doors to new A's. #1 - you tell them you date A's #2 - I'm an A so I need to hide it. Wow! That's exactly what my exabf had to think. I didn't give him all the details of my lif...	Hawk120025	4	663	Sep 10, 2009 by Jennifer
	When They Get Clean (Preview) I can thank Al-Anon for giving me the courage and the tools to let my son get himself clean. He recently married and things are going well. His business status was such that while he was using, he managed not to lose everything. His credit suffered as he was late on making payments at time but somehow...	anonymiss	5	602	Sep 10, 2009 by Jen
	Enabling vs helping What about the children (Preview) My mother and I provide babysitting for my brothers family. My sister-in-law never lifts a finger to clean anything. She seldom even fixes food for the kids. My mom struggles to know when to step in and help the kids by cleaning and trying to get a meal together or if that is enabling the mother to abdicat...	smartkat	7	886	Sep 10, 2009 by smartkat
	90 day journey of self improvement... (Preview) Yesterday I embarked on a 90 day journey of self improvement. I have decided to do this to get on with my life and let go of my ex boyfriend. I am not smoking, drinking, eating carbs or seeking a relationship/sex for the next 90 days. Plus exercising every day. I'm hoping to lose 45lbs in 90 days. I am r...	carolinagirl	8	695	Sep 10, 2009 by kitty
	my share today on courage, faith, hope (Preview) This is from my share today and I was encouraged to share this with others, so Im doing just that. not feeling too prolific but i'll give it a go ;) i was very hopless for so long i was seeing & obsessing on the situations of others and ignoring my own i suffered a lot of pain & anguish mental anxi...	kitty	6	1535	Sep 9, 2009 by christinajeanne
	Ok day one of my steps to give my addiction to hp (Preview) Today I choose to not eat sugar. I may have fruit, and real 100% fruit juice. sigh, I have to. So keep doing the one day at a time, give it to hp. And put down those things I naturally grab to buy. The first step goes thru my head and it is true. Have craved it all my life. Doc just ok'ed me a gluco meter from this co...	debilyn	5	621	Sep 9, 2009 by kitty
	Why is change so bad and scary? (Preview) I am grateful that my step mother shared the wonderful world of Alanon with me. It is times like this that I feel often directionless, stressed, and pressured to be perfect. I have to make the "right choice." I am blessed with the opportunity to be able to seek new employment and have several...	MyThoughts2U2	3	601	Sep 9, 2009 by MyThoughts2U2
	teddybearpoet (Preview) So what are you up to and how are you feeling girl? I keep thinking of you and depression. It is such a hard disease and most feel it in their lives. Grief, different losses, all kinds of things, then for some reason our body cannot get back into that balance of the normal chemicals. That commercial on tv is...	debilyn	4	574	Sep 9, 2009 by teddybearpoet
	As long as there is Al=Anon...there is hope (Preview) Hi. It's been ages since I posted. ( Sorry) You've no idea how many times I have posted,and lost it,or got an error message. But I really wanted to let you all know that really,this Alanon programme is just fantastic. A brief recap on my situation............for those that don't know me. I am English,b...	chris52	4	543	Sep 9, 2009 by chris52
	Blah (Preview) I'm sad. I'm awake in the time I should be sleeping. I don't want to share which means I probably should and I don't know where to start and I really don't want to start the whole eyes leaking big fat tears and not being able to breathe properly so I am not going to. I want this whole new ABF situation clear...	Jennifer	3	676	Sep 9, 2009 by Rita G
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.