Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

maresie · maresie

One new thing for me in making any kind of friendship is looking at that persons boundaries. If they have an issue with them that is a red flag for me. I no longer charge into any relationship because I "like" someone. I evaulate, feed back, look at levels, work on how I can change my bounda...

RLC · RLC

To MY MIP FAMILY, Just a short post to tell everyone I am alive and well. I check in almost every day and I miss posting, but I have been so busy with my business (Ladies Wholesale Apparel) that I have had very little time. Thank goodness ladies don't know we are in a recession, only their husbands do. LOL...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

So Friday night I took my kids to the local buffalo wild wings for karaoke, we met up with a few other single moms and their kids. My oldest daughter (15) was out at the movies with her friends and got dropped off there after the show. So I'm talking to a nice guy and we are really hitting it off. She walks u...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

JUST WHEN I THOUGHT MY DAY WAS GOING TO TURN AROUND, I GOT A BILL! DON'T KNOW YET IF I HAVE TO PAY IT! IT JUST IRKS ME TO RECEIVE A BILL WHEN THERE IS BASICALLY NOTHING I CAN DO ABOUT IT ON THE WEEKEND WHEN I RECEIVED IT! SO, I STRESSED & LET IT BOTHER ME FOR QUITE AWHILE ON SATURDAY WHICH WAS SUPPOSED TO BE MY...

Tattyhead · Tattyhead

Sorry Just need to rant and then Ill go away again AH not well this am vomiting, etc. I went to work, telling him to keep taking sips of water and brandy if he could to ward off withdrawal seizures. Son phoned me at 10 to say his dad was being sick and he was worried. I asked if he was talking to him and taking sip...

Jozie · Jozie

Welp... Made it thru yet another LONG weekend... My boy had a game first thing Sat. Morn, and it was agaisnt a Christian Acadamy, which in the end could have ended alot uglier then it did, but our boys hung in there, and did the best they could playing against a team that had "Highschool" kids o...

rutnut · rutnut

I had dated this lady for a few months seven years ago. I broke up with her because of her heavy drinking. So I get a call from her back in march out of the blue. I was just coming out of another relationship. So we eventually started seeing each other again. She told me she no longer drank much, nor did she ca...

Melissa21 · Melissa21

Any ESH is much appreciated! Court will be coming up for child support and my A thinks they will do visitation at that time. I have no clue, but if they don't it will be sometime. I know I should just worry about today and not the future, but I think I need to prepare myself for when the time comes. I do not want...

Mariner · Mariner

Dear (((All))) Just checking in to say'HI' and thank you all for being here. I continue to work my program and make small steps forward in my recovery. Things are going ok and I'm getting so much better at setting and keeping my boundaries with my ex A, I realise I cant rest back on this as it is so easy for...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I WILL TRY TO STAY POSITIVE TODAY! NOT EVEN THE RAIN WILL BRING ME DOWN! I KNOW THE RAIN IS NECESSARY BUT SOMETIMES IT CAUSES A BIT OF SADD! EVERYONE PLEASE DO THE SAME. I KNOW THAT WE CAN ALL PULL TOGETHER & SUPPORT EACH OTHER NOW MATTER WHAT! BLESS YOU ALL!

Sincerely · Sincerely

Hello everyone, My hubbys round two at rehab ended after 9 days this time. First time was 4 days. The difference for me is that I had no expectations this time. This short round 2 is confirmation that i made the right decision to ask him to leave our home 6 weeks ago. I'm good. I'm happy. And I lost 18lbs...

N8SMOM · N8SMOM

We dropped my husband off at the treatment facility in Tucson yesterday. We were lucky enough to have insurance cover a HUGE portion of it. He will be gone for 30 to 45 days depending on how many days insurance wants to cover. I'm having some anxiety with him being gone and me being home alone to handle...

doxie · doxie

I have attached a photo of sons and nephew for you to look at. Lucas is the one in the middle, sitting in the chair with the dog on his lap. His younger brother is the one with the white shirt and hat and the other is their cousin. Lucas is doing so well. He is healing very well and about to go to full time at work...

Inpain · Inpain

It sucks and sucks the life out of you. My husband is having a rough time right now. His brother is dying and he's under a lot of stress and pressure. We've been doing VERY VERY well because we've both been pursing active healthy things and avoiding the negative. I'm very very proud of myself and him. HO...

sunshines1 · sunshines1

Recently a program friend and I were discussing meeting topics, essentially saying what a simple program this is, no need to make it complicated with off the wall, frilly kind of topics. There's plenty that can be found in Forums and the index of the literature. Not to say that they too don't serve a pur...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hi Family, I had something funny happen that I just wanted to share with you and I hope it gives you all a chuckle like it did the f2f group I shared with last night. Last night I went to a f2f meeting. It was pretty small and with 30 minutes left to the end of the meeting we had all shared. Well the chair asked us...

lonewolfmama · lonewolfmama

I finally left the A father of my 10 mos. old child after six years. After watching him devolve into his old self so many times, and standing by him when he came to and decided to make changes and then fall again, I have left, moved out on my own and am living with friends and at my office. Although it is painf...

HollyM · HollyM

I am new to this, and everyone else seems to know all the language and the processes and the way to do stuff? How do you learn, and how do you get started?

ernie · ernie

Sorry for the delay everyone!!! September Business meeting Minutes Meeting was held September 13, 2009 Meeting opened with the serenity prayer Motion to accept August Business Meeting Minutes as posted on the Board - Voted on and accepted Chair meeting schedule was posted no revisions were m...

Data395 · Data395

Hi, I'm new here. :) my significant other is an alcoholic. I am here to learn more about the disease and how it has affected me. I recognize that it is a family disease and it not only affects them but us as well. I have detachment issues; I want to learn to detach. My friend attends meetings as well and says...

danz123 · danz123

October Agenda Review of September minutes Review of op meeting schedule New Business Nominations for service positions Chairperson Secretary Discussion of addition to FAQS Old Business Op duties Chairing meetings Idle times Please pm me if you have any additional items -- Edited...

Overcome · Overcome

Today's reading (Oct. 3) in One Day at a Time in Al-Anon, reminded me that sometimes I need to be gentle with the newcomer. They are not familiar with all our slogans and sayings. I don't want them to feel the outsider or act as if I have it all together and that they just need to 'snap out of it'. I don't know...

maresie · maresie

I am almost 2 months out now from having had the check stolen. There is no sign of a replacement check. I can either let this issue consume me (which it certainly has) or detach detach and then detach some more. Of course I want it to be anything but it is. I don't believe I actually have a choice if I want to...

flower5361 · flower5361

First of all, I want to say I'm glad I found this board and I apologize in advance for the long rant coming. I've been doing some reading to get more information, and it is now clear to me what is going on with my husband. I am in my second marriage (almost 3 years) and was married the first time for 22 year...

layneee · layneee

HELLO ALL--- JUST WANTING TO VENT A LITTLE BIT RIGHT NOW. I GUESS AS I START THE WORDS HOPEFULLY WILL FLOW RIGHT FROM MY LAST POST TO NOW, I HAVE RECIEVED GREAT FEEDBACK ON HOW TO HANDLE THIS IN THE RIGHT MANNER. I HAVE BEEN TAKING "MYSELF" OUT OF THE EQUATION AND LOOKING AT IT FROM A DIFFERENT P...

Stormy · Stormy

My husband is an alcoholic who just started attending meetings 2 weeks ago. It seems, to me, that he has replaced alcohol with attending meetings. He leaves an hour before the meeting is to start and comes home an hour or more after the meeting ends. Our marriage is in shambles from the drinking and n...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Does anyone have any tips for impusle control? I think I have ADHD... I get the urge to do/say something and I do it. I make really poor decisions when I'm mad or sick and I need some tips on how other people control the impulse. Anything?

shellyj123 · shellyj123

I wanted to do 90 meetings in 90 days, starting tomorrow, and REALLY put myself into the program as much as possible right now. I need it for myself and I need it to help me keep the focus on me (as a very close friend told me and is correct-when I was REALLY working the program I was at my happiest) In my area...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

Yesterday was a trying day in many ways. I've had harder I'm sure, but yesterday I was being tested or so it felt. I started the day having to call my son's father's place and dealing with his wife. (my son's father has been an absent parent from day one and I have fought child support battles for years wi...

Aloha · Aloha

I've been having a challenging week. AH's family is out visiting and when they visit, AH goes dry. And when he is dry, his disease is exposed and raw and it is ANGRY and HOSTILE and on a witch hunt. The nice thing is, AH's brother and his girlfriend are AA members who take their meetings seriously. I know I g...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

Woke up this am DETERMINED to put my focus back on me and get out of the rut I have been in. Hit my dailys hard, always grateful that I had the extra money to buy them as they are a gift in each and every way, everyday. Came into the office and the first thing I did was come here and read.....always the best way t...

Baffled · Baffled

So far so good. It' been almost 3 years since my first Al-Anon meeting 11/06 and 2 years online as well. Not so long compared to many veterans. Not that I'm getting complacent because I know there is so much more for me to do. It's taken this long just to cut through some of my denial and really start to under...

Katy · Katy

I married someone that I thought I could fix, I married someone that I thought would work hard at wanting to work hard at buliding a life together, note the (I)! It was all about what I wanted, what I thought I should have, fast forward 29 years +, It was very selfish of me to think I had that control over anot...

Jozie · Jozie

Hey Guys :) Sorry I have been vacant here lately... I have been having DAILY Headaches that have been limiting my Computer time.. I work at a computer all day, and most evennings My Head hurts so bad I can't seem to get on... I am sure "this too Shall Pass" but it has really weighed me to death it s...

layneee · layneee

HELLO... IM NEW TO ALL OF THIS, AND THIS IS MY FIRST POST. IM HOPING TO GAIN SOME INSIGHT ON THE FEELINGS THAT I HAVE BEEN HAVING. WE HAVE BEEN TOGETHER FOR 2 YEARS AND WITHIN THOSE 2 YEARS, THERE HAVE BEEN 5 HOSPITAL STAYS (ALL DUE TO ALCOHOL RELATED ISSUES) OF COURSE , IN THE BEGINNING OF THE RELATIONSHIP I...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

There was a post by smartkat recently about favorite personal slogans. I just heard one that is a new favorite, but everything that touches me and works is a favorite :). "Al-anon Won" A member was sharing at a recent F2F that she heard another member sharing about the alcoholic in her life a...

Ness · Ness

After 21 days of a 28 day recovery programme my Ason is back living rough on the street. My daughter spoke to him this morning thinking he was still in rehab but he told her he was drinking and was going to continue drinking. I havent contacted him.....Please keep him in your prayers.Love Ness x

Karilynn · Karilynn

((((Family)))), Good morning. As most of you know my brother-in-law is sitting in jail b/c he got caught making meth. According to my oldest niece (who actually has talked to him) he's doing okay. He's accepting responsibilty for his actions. He actually turned down bail b/c he knows it's not sa...

maresie · maresie

I know this latest catastrophe with the stolen check has made me have to look at how I live. I simply can't go around in a sea of resentment anymore. At the same time, my boundaries need a lot of reinforcement and work. I also know that I have to learn to make the best of what I have. There is no question thes...

Bluelady · Bluelady

I just lost my father to Alzhiemers. I was his caregiver for 6 years. I don't know what I would have done without my on line support group. We shared, we supported each other and sometimes just said we understood. This is what I thought this group would be like. I live in a small rural area and meeting is at...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Today I have a new attitude, I feel resolved, like I am finished with trying to convince my ex bf to come back or that he still feels something or that our love is the right thing, etc. etc. etc. Even if it's true it doesn't matter anymore. I have felt this way before so I am wary. I really feel that I just do...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

(((((((((Hello Friends)))))))), Well today was one of those days when you think the world is ending, I got a letter in the mail stating I was about to lose my home....here my husband did not pay the taxes in 2005 and it was going up for sale....well by t he grace of GOD I got a back payment in the mail today fr...

alanonicScotland · alanonicScotland

just wondered. I like listening :)

alanonicScotland · alanonicScotland

First, can anyone tell me the name of that new CAL book that has a lot of new readings and sup-posedly adult child stuff? I saw one recently and haven;t since and would like ot get one - pinkish or purple cover as I recall... quick share: I am SO sad abotu the state of meetings where I am. They are really, gene...

gardenia1 · gardenia1

Hello. Im looking for a bit of guidance. I am a mother of two young children and both of my parents became late-in-life alcohlics. After a dramatic confrontation that lasted days and involved suicide threats, verbal abuse, etc --both of my parents joined AA and received private counseling as wel...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

I am filled with gratitude and very blessed, but the past couple of weeks have left me repeatedly feeling off and struggling to stay on track. Though this is my favorite time of year, it also holds memories from the past and difficult times filled with hurt, times that come back to mind even more so thi...

Shellybelly · Shellybelly

hello my name is shell, and my father is a alcoholic. i have never before been in a aa meeting but a friend has encouraged me to join. i suffer from severe depression and ptsd due to my father. he is very abusive when he is drunk and i have recently have ad to move outta home cause he told me to jump in the river a...

MaryPoppins · MaryPoppins

Hello Friends, Well, it finally happened, my A stopped drinking, although a raging (in more than one sense of the word) dry drunk. It happened about a year ago. Before alanon, I used to look up all the bad things that happen to severe drunks (as in daily drinking to the point of blackout, YIKES) and try...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Well, the fallout came from the can of worms I opened with the ex. Just when I think I'm done I'm cutting off all contact there he is again and I'm sure he feels the same about me. I wish we could just be civil to eachother, be friends and nothing more at this point. I don't know if it's possible but I guess a...

MissyPoo · MissyPoo

I decided to go tho the poilice station this morning to report the threats my AH had made against myself and my children. I was thinking this would be a 1/2 an hour, report the incident, get some advice on what to do when and if I do decide to leave and that be it. OH BOY, was I wrong. Turns out, here in Ontar...

Gailey · Gailey

My son will be in rehab 1 week tomorrow. He seems really good when I talk to him. He has been voted to be the community director (the go to guy as he called it) because he can get along with everyone. Last night a councelor ask him if he would be a guest speaker for guys who come in for only the weekend. I was surp...

drucilla06 · drucilla06

It has been said that we are drawn to alcoholics because they make US feel good about ourselves. That when we take care of them,complain about what they do,it makes US feel superior. I have seen this in myself but not just with alcoholics.I will carry on at work about how stupid people are, which I guess I...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I AM BEGINNING TO SEE MORE & MORE THAT I HAVE TOO MUCH TIME ON MY HANDS! I AM PROBABLY POSTING TOO MUCH BUT THEN AGAIN, I CAN ONLY GET TO THE COMPUTER 3 OR 4 DAYS A WEEK FOR ONE HOUR A DAY! I GUESS I AM ALWAYS "SECOND GUESSING" MYSELF, TOO! TOO MUCH TIME TO THINK. I HAVE BEEN TRYING HOBBIES A LIT...

TF · TF

My therapist suggested that my AH and I sit down and discuss openly the resentments we have for each other. In my past therapy sessions we have been discussing how the past has hurt me and how i am having a hard time letting go of it. She suggested we do this and warned it would be painful. I brought it up t...

Bluelady · Bluelady

I posted last week for the first time when I learned my daughter has a drinking problem. She lives in another town and kept it well hiden, until her husband told us. She is in outpatient program now. First meeting was last Sat. My question is: is there anything I can say or do to help her in this journey or an...

Suzannah · Suzannah

It has to be said that there are unsung heros on this board and I for one want to recognise them. They are the people who dedicate time and effort and work "backstage" for the good of others. We are so lucky here to have such people on this board to keep it safe from abuse. MIP has played an enormo...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

Well after a day yesterday of feeling off and making a BIG mistake at work, and having to work over to fix it all, I decided to make today a "me" day and took the day off to try and gather myself together a bit. I have been feeling off and struggling all week and it is showing in every area of my life...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

Spent much of this weekend not feeling well, so while lying around I had some time to reflect on things a bit. I never sit still, have the hardest time with it and this weekend I had no choice.......think HP really just wanted me to slow down and take care of me for a bit. Before AlAnon I would have felt trem...

ditto · ditto

I need some of your thoughts and experience please. The situation is that I was happily married for 18 years to my first husband. He died. Five years later I married my second husband. I had no idea he was an a. I figure it out in the 3rd month of our marriage. By the 6th month of our marriage the verbal a...

SWgal · SWgal

Hi all. I am new here and pretty hopeless that things in my life will get any better, but coming to sites like this and reading about other people in the same situation as me makes me feel less alone. I am married to an alcoholic. We have two young children. AH's behavior is getting worse and worse. He drin...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	boundaries. (Preview) One new thing for me in making any kind of friendship is looking at that persons boundaries. If they have an issue with them that is a red flag for me. I no longer charge into any relationship because I "like" someone. I evaulate, feed back, look at levels, work on how I can change my bounda...	maresie	0	454	Oct 6, 2009 by maresie
	Just Wanted To Say Hello And Thanks (Preview) To MY MIP FAMILY, Just a short post to tell everyone I am alive and well. I check in almost every day and I miss posting, but I have been so busy with my business (Ladies Wholesale Apparel) that I have had very little time. Thank goodness ladies don't know we are in a recession, only their husbands do. LOL...	RLC	6	731	Oct 6, 2009 by tea2
	More Drama with the ex bf - I think I'm making progress (Preview) So Friday night I took my kids to the local buffalo wild wings for karaoke, we met up with a few other single moms and their kids. My oldest daughter (15) was out at the movies with her friends and got dropped off there after the show. So I'm talking to a nice guy and we are really hitting it off. She walks u...	carolinagirl	5	422	Oct 6, 2009 by carolinagirl
	DIDN'T HAVE A POSITIVE DAY THOUGH I TRIED! (Preview) JUST WHEN I THOUGHT MY DAY WAS GOING TO TURN AROUND, I GOT A BILL! DON'T KNOW YET IF I HAVE TO PAY IT! IT JUST IRKS ME TO RECEIVE A BILL WHEN THERE IS BASICALLY NOTHING I CAN DO ABOUT IT ON THE WEEKEND WHEN I RECEIVED IT! SO, I STRESSED & LET IT BOTHER ME FOR QUITE AWHILE ON SATURDAY WHICH WAS SUPPOSED TO BE MY...	Hoot Nanny	5	561	Oct 6, 2009 by blender_girl
	Stressed (Preview) Sorry Just need to rant and then Ill go away again AH not well this am vomiting, etc. I went to work, telling him to keep taking sips of water and brandy if he could to ward off withdrawal seizures. Son phoned me at 10 to say his dad was being sick and he was worried. I asked if he was talking to him and taking sip...	Tattyhead	3	465	Oct 5, 2009 by Jerry F
	Looking for Ideas.. :o) Honoring :o) (Preview) Welp... Made it thru yet another LONG weekend... My boy had a game first thing Sat. Morn, and it was agaisnt a Christian Acadamy, which in the end could have ended alot uglier then it did, but our boys hung in there, and did the best they could playing against a team that had "Highschool" kids o...	Jozie	2	539	Oct 5, 2009 by Jozie
	After six years the phone rings (Preview) I had dated this lady for a few months seven years ago. I broke up with her because of her heavy drinking. So I get a call from her back in march out of the blue. I was just coming out of another relationship. So we eventually started seeing each other again. She told me she no longer drank much, nor did she ca...	rutnut	10	868	Oct 5, 2009 by rutnut
	Anyone deal with going to court for visitation with an A (Preview) Any ESH is much appreciated! Court will be coming up for child support and my A thinks they will do visitation at that time. I have no clue, but if they don't it will be sometime. I know I should just worry about today and not the future, but I think I need to prepare myself for when the time comes. I do not want...	Melissa21	12	569	Oct 5, 2009 by maresie
	Hi to all and gratitude to Shelly (Preview) Dear (((All))) Just checking in to say'HI' and thank you all for being here. I continue to work my program and make small steps forward in my recovery. Things are going ok and I'm getting so much better at setting and keeping my boundaries with my ex A, I realise I cant rest back on this as it is so easy for...	Mariner	4	516	Oct 5, 2009 by shellyj123
	trying to stay possitive! (Preview) I WILL TRY TO STAY POSITIVE TODAY! NOT EVEN THE RAIN WILL BRING ME DOWN! I KNOW THE RAIN IS NECESSARY BUT SOMETIMES IT CAUSES A BIT OF SADD! EVERYONE PLEASE DO THE SAME. I KNOW THAT WE CAN ALL PULL TOGETHER & SUPPORT EACH OTHER NOW MATTER WHAT! BLESS YOU ALL!	Hoot Nanny	6	604	Oct 5, 2009 by Jozie
	rehab round 2...over (Preview) Hello everyone, My hubbys round two at rehab ended after 9 days this time. First time was 4 days. The difference for me is that I had no expectations this time. This short round 2 is confirmation that i made the right decision to ask him to leave our home 6 weeks ago. I'm good. I'm happy. And I lost 18lbs...	Sincerely	5	566	Oct 5, 2009 by Jozie
	Day One of Husband in Treatment (Preview) We dropped my husband off at the treatment facility in Tucson yesterday. We were lucky enough to have insurance cover a HUGE portion of it. He will be gone for 30 to 45 days depending on how many days insurance wants to cover. I'm having some anxiety with him being gone and me being home alone to handle...	N8SMOM	8	597	Oct 5, 2009 by Jozie
	Update on son and photo (Preview) I have attached a photo of sons and nephew for you to look at. Lucas is the one in the middle, sitting in the chair with the dog on his lap. His younger brother is the one with the white shirt and hat and the other is their cousin. Lucas is doing so well. He is healing very well and about to go to full time at work...	doxie	12	671	Oct 5, 2009 by blender_girl
	FEAR (Preview) It sucks and sucks the life out of you. My husband is having a rough time right now. His brother is dying and he's under a lot of stress and pressure. We've been doing VERY VERY well because we've both been pursing active healthy things and avoiding the negative. I'm very very proud of myself and him. HO...	Inpain	6	1484	Oct 5, 2009 by Mandy123
	simple meetings (Preview) Recently a program friend and I were discussing meeting topics, essentially saying what a simple program this is, no need to make it complicated with off the wall, frilly kind of topics. There's plenty that can be found in Forums and the index of the literature. Not to say that they too don't serve a pur...	sunshines1	4	584	Oct 5, 2009 by abbyal
	Alanon Humor (Preview) Hi Family, I had something funny happen that I just wanted to share with you and I hope it gives you all a chuckle like it did the f2f group I shared with last night. Last night I went to a f2f meeting. It was pretty small and with 30 minutes left to the end of the meeting we had all shared. Well the chair asked us...	Mandy123	3	4145	Oct 4, 2009 by Maria123
	I did it! And it's so hard!! (Preview) I finally left the A father of my 10 mos. old child after six years. After watching him devolve into his old self so many times, and standing by him when he came to and decided to make changes and then fall again, I have left, moved out on my own and am living with friends and at my office. Although it is painf...	lonewolfmama	9	925	Oct 4, 2009 by Sincerely
	I'm New (Preview) I am new to this, and everyone else seems to know all the language and the processes and the way to do stuff? How do you learn, and how do you get started?	HollyM	9	565	Oct 4, 2009 by Sincerely
	September Business Meeting Minutes (Preview) Sorry for the delay everyone!!! September Business meeting Minutes Meeting was held September 13, 2009 Meeting opened with the serenity prayer Motion to accept August Business Meeting Minutes as posted on the Board - Voted on and accepted Chair meeting schedule was posted no revisions were m...	ernie	0	345	Oct 4, 2009 by ernie
	recognizing the family disease (Preview) Hi, I'm new here. :) my significant other is an alcoholic. I am here to learn more about the disease and how it has affected me. I recognize that it is a family disease and it not only affects them but us as well. I have detachment issues; I want to learn to detach. My friend attends meetings as well and says...	Data395	4	693	Oct 3, 2009 by Data395
	October Business Meeting Agenda 10/4 9pm est (Preview) October Agenda Review of September minutes Review of op meeting schedule New Business Nominations for service positions Chairperson Secretary Discussion of addition to FAQS Old Business Op duties Chairing meetings Idle times Please pm me if you have any additional items -- Edited...	danz123	0	505	Oct 3, 2009 by danz123
	Cheery Platitudes (Preview) Today's reading (Oct. 3) in One Day at a Time in Al-Anon, reminded me that sometimes I need to be gentle with the newcomer. They are not familiar with all our slogans and sayings. I don't want them to feel the outsider or act as if I have it all together and that they just need to 'snap out of it'. I don't know...	Overcome	3	716	Oct 3, 2009 by Jerry F
	acceptance (Preview) I am almost 2 months out now from having had the check stolen. There is no sign of a replacement check. I can either let this issue consume me (which it certainly has) or detach detach and then detach some more. Of course I want it to be anything but it is. I don't believe I actually have a choice if I want to...	maresie	4	565	Oct 3, 2009 by Ness
	NEW HERE....FINALLY AN ANSWER (Preview) First of all, I want to say I'm glad I found this board and I apologize in advance for the long rant coming. I've been doing some reading to get more information, and it is now clear to me what is going on with my husband. I am in my second marriage (almost 3 years) and was married the first time for 22 year...	flower5361	9	530	Oct 2, 2009 by flower5361
	RESENTMENT & ANGER.....NORMAL EVEN BEFORE HE GOES TO REHAB???? (Preview) HELLO ALL--- JUST WANTING TO VENT A LITTLE BIT RIGHT NOW. I GUESS AS I START THE WORDS HOPEFULLY WILL FLOW RIGHT FROM MY LAST POST TO NOW, I HAVE RECIEVED GREAT FEEDBACK ON HOW TO HANDLE THIS IN THE RIGHT MANNER. I HAVE BEEN TAKING "MYSELF" OUT OF THE EQUATION AND LOOKING AT IT FROM A DIFFERENT P...	layneee	7	961	Oct 2, 2009 by layneee
	Need some honest advice! (Preview) My husband is an alcoholic who just started attending meetings 2 weeks ago. It seems, to me, that he has replaced alcohol with attending meetings. He leaves an hour before the meeting is to start and comes home an hour or more after the meeting ends. Our marriage is in shambles from the drinking and n...	Stormy	9	572	Oct 2, 2009 by HollyM
	Tips!!!??? (Preview) Does anyone have any tips for impusle control? I think I have ADHD... I get the urge to do/say something and I do it. I make really poor decisions when I'm mad or sick and I need some tips on how other people control the impulse. Anything?	carolinagirl	4	596	Oct 2, 2009 by Jen
	90 meetings in 90 days.........Question about online meetings??? Need some help.... (Preview) I wanted to do 90 meetings in 90 days, starting tomorrow, and REALLY put myself into the program as much as possible right now. I need it for myself and I need it to help me keep the focus on me (as a very close friend told me and is correct-when I was REALLY working the program I was at my happiest) In my area...	shellyj123	9	813	Oct 2, 2009 by Data395
	This program really does work if you work it! Letting go and movin forward...... (Preview) Yesterday was a trying day in many ways. I've had harder I'm sure, but yesterday I was being tested or so it felt. I started the day having to call my son's father's place and dealing with his wife. (my son's father has been an absent parent from day one and I have fought child support battles for years wi...	shellyj123	3	581	Oct 2, 2009 by serendipity
	I don't have the allergy, but I can still relate! (Preview) I've been having a challenging week. AH's family is out visiting and when they visit, AH goes dry. And when he is dry, his disease is exposed and raw and it is ANGRY and HOSTILE and on a witch hunt. The nice thing is, AH's brother and his girlfriend are AA members who take their meetings seriously. I know I g...	Aloha	2	675	Oct 2, 2009 by debilyn
	Day One of 90..Heading in strong (Preview) Woke up this am DETERMINED to put my focus back on me and get out of the rut I have been in. Hit my dailys hard, always grateful that I had the extra money to buy them as they are a gift in each and every way, everyday. Came into the office and the first thing I did was come here and read.....always the best way t...	shellyj123	3	717	Oct 2, 2009 by debilyn
	Getting better (Preview) So far so good. It' been almost 3 years since my first Al-Anon meeting 11/06 and 2 years online as well. Not so long compared to many veterans. Not that I'm getting complacent because I know there is so much more for me to do. It's taken this long just to cut through some of my denial and really start to under...	Baffled	3	583	Oct 1, 2009 by Jerry F
	All I did wrong was? to chose someone to marry for all the wrong reasons! (Preview) I married someone that I thought I could fix, I married someone that I thought would work hard at wanting to work hard at buliding a life together, note the (I)! It was all about what I wanted, what I thought I should have, fast forward 29 years +, It was very selfish of me to think I had that control over anot...	Katy	6	684	Oct 1, 2009 by drucilla06
	Alcoholism...Strikes again... (Preview) Hey Guys :) Sorry I have been vacant here lately... I have been having DAILY Headaches that have been limiting my Computer time.. I work at a computer all day, and most evennings My Head hurts so bad I can't seem to get on... I am sure "this too Shall Pass" but it has really weighed me to death it s...	Jozie	8	828	Oct 1, 2009 by Jozie
	31 YR OLD BF WITH CIRRHOSIS AND STILL DRINKING (Preview) HELLO... IM NEW TO ALL OF THIS, AND THIS IS MY FIRST POST. IM HOPING TO GAIN SOME INSIGHT ON THE FEELINGS THAT I HAVE BEEN HAVING. WE HAVE BEEN TOGETHER FOR 2 YEARS AND WITHIN THOSE 2 YEARS, THERE HAVE BEEN 5 HOSPITAL STAYS (ALL DUE TO ALCOHOL RELATED ISSUES) OF COURSE , IN THE BEGINNING OF THE RELATIONSHIP I...	layneee	12	1452	Oct 1, 2009 by Jerry F
	Smartkat, this is for you well and for the rest of the family here ;) (Preview) There was a post by smartkat recently about favorite personal slogans. I just heard one that is a new favorite, but everything that touches me and works is a favorite :). "Al-anon Won" A member was sharing at a recent F2F that she heard another member sharing about the alcoholic in her life a...	Mandy123	0	440	Sep 30, 2009 by Mandy123
	He only made it to 21 days this time....... (Preview) After 21 days of a 28 day recovery programme my Ason is back living rough on the street. My daughter spoke to him this morning thinking he was still in rehab but he told her he was drinking and was going to continue drinking. I havent contacted him.....Please keep him in your prayers.Love Ness x	Ness	11	626	Sep 30, 2009 by Ness
	Letter to my BIL. (Preview) ((((Family)))), Good morning. As most of you know my brother-in-law is sitting in jail b/c he got caught making meth. According to my oldest niece (who actually has talked to him) he's doing okay. He's accepting responsibilty for his actions. He actually turned down bail b/c he knows it's not sa...	Karilynn	9	579	Sep 30, 2009 by Andrea12
	Treading lightly in the world (Preview) I know this latest catastrophe with the stolen check has made me have to look at how I live. I simply can't go around in a sea of resentment anymore. At the same time, my boundaries need a lot of reinforcement and work. I also know that I have to learn to make the best of what I have. There is no question thes...	maresie	5	624	Sep 30, 2009 by Andrea12
	I think you are right (Preview) I just lost my father to Alzhiemers. I was his caregiver for 6 years. I don't know what I would have done without my on line support group. We shared, we supported each other and sometimes just said we understood. This is what I thought this group would be like. I live in a small rural area and meeting is at...	Bluelady	8	684	Sep 30, 2009 by Andrea12
	New attitude...today (Preview) Today I have a new attitude, I feel resolved, like I am finished with trying to convince my ex bf to come back or that he still feels something or that our love is the right thing, etc. etc. etc. Even if it's true it doesn't matter anymore. I have felt this way before so I am wary. I really feel that I just do...	carolinagirl	6	438	Sep 30, 2009 by carolinagirl
	Just when you think there is no hope.....Life suprises you (Preview) (((((((((Hello Friends)))))))), Well today was one of those days when you think the world is ending, I got a letter in the mail stating I was about to lose my home....here my husband did not pay the taxes in 2005 and it was going up for sale....well by t he grace of GOD I got a back payment in the mail today fr...	Andrea12	10	879	Sep 30, 2009 by Andrea12
	Just a thought: are there any Skype meetings as well (Preview) just wondered. I like listening :)	alanonicScotland	6	1953	Sep 30, 2009 by Tattyhead
	Lonely for recovery in Scotland (Preview) First, can anyone tell me the name of that new CAL book that has a lot of new readings and sup-posedly adult child stuff? I saw one recently and haven;t since and would like ot get one - pinkish or purple cover as I recall... quick share: I am SO sad abotu the state of meetings where I am. They are really, gene...	alanonicScotland	7	564	Sep 30, 2009 by chezza
	Newbie who feels guilty for wanting to roll my eyes as I listen to all the AA sayings... (Preview) Hello. Im looking for a bit of guidance. I am a mother of two young children and both of my parents became late-in-life alcohlics. After a dramatic confrontation that lasted days and involved suicide threats, verbal abuse, etc --both of my parents joined AA and received private counseling as wel...	gardenia1	6	585	Sep 30, 2009 by alanonicScotland
	I asked for a sign, and I got it....always in HP's time not mine... (Preview) I am filled with gratitude and very blessed, but the past couple of weeks have left me repeatedly feeling off and struggling to stay on track. Though this is my favorite time of year, it also holds memories from the past and difficult times filled with hurt, times that come back to mind even more so thi...	shellyj123	5	581	Sep 30, 2009 by nmike
	Newbie saying hi (Preview) hello my name is shell, and my father is a alcoholic. i have never before been in a aa meeting but a friend has encouraged me to join. i suffer from severe depression and ptsd due to my father. he is very abusive when he is drunk and i have recently have ad to move outta home cause he told me to jump in the river a...	Shellybelly	5	594	Sep 29, 2009 by Shellybelly
	I don't like...living under the alcoholic's spotlight...but I can take it! (Preview) Hello Friends, Well, it finally happened, my A stopped drinking, although a raging (in more than one sense of the word) dry drunk. It happened about a year ago. Before alanon, I used to look up all the bad things that happen to severe drunks (as in daily drinking to the point of blackout, YIKES) and try...	MaryPoppins	4	547	Sep 29, 2009 by Aloha
	Back slide and the can of worms. (Preview) Well, the fallout came from the can of worms I opened with the ex. Just when I think I'm done I'm cutting off all contact there he is again and I'm sure he feels the same about me. I wish we could just be civil to eachother, be friends and nothing more at this point. I don't know if it's possible but I guess a...	carolinagirl	3	540	Sep 29, 2009 by maresie
	Stirred up a Hornets nest now! (Preview) I decided to go tho the poilice station this morning to report the threats my AH had made against myself and my children. I was thinking this would be a 1/2 an hour, report the incident, get some advice on what to do when and if I do decide to leave and that be it. OH BOY, was I wrong. Turns out, here in Ontar...	MissyPoo	19	748	Sep 29, 2009 by Tattyhead
	update on son in rehab (Preview) My son will be in rehab 1 week tomorrow. He seems really good when I talk to him. He has been voted to be the community director (the go to guy as he called it) because he can get along with everyone. Last night a councelor ask him if he would be a guest speaker for guys who come in for only the weekend. I was surp...	Gailey	5	681	Sep 29, 2009 by Rita G
	Is this true?? (Preview) It has been said that we are drawn to alcoholics because they make US feel good about ourselves. That when we take care of them,complain about what they do,it makes US feel superior. I have seen this in myself but not just with alcoholics.I will carry on at work about how stupid people are, which I guess I...	drucilla06	10	663	Sep 29, 2009 by carolinagirl
	too much time on my hands! (Preview) I AM BEGINNING TO SEE MORE & MORE THAT I HAVE TOO MUCH TIME ON MY HANDS! I AM PROBABLY POSTING TOO MUCH BUT THEN AGAIN, I CAN ONLY GET TO THE COMPUTER 3 OR 4 DAYS A WEEK FOR ONE HOUR A DAY! I GUESS I AM ALWAYS "SECOND GUESSING" MYSELF, TOO! TOO MUCH TIME TO THINK. I HAVE BEEN TRYING HOBBIES A LIT...	Hoot Nanny	4	542	Sep 29, 2009 by Jerry F
	Is it a good idea???? (Preview) My therapist suggested that my AH and I sit down and discuss openly the resentments we have for each other. In my past therapy sessions we have been discussing how the past has hurt me and how i am having a hard time letting go of it. She suggested we do this and warned it would be painful. I brought it up t...	TF	3	604	Sep 29, 2009 by abbyal
	Need your advice (Preview) I posted last week for the first time when I learned my daughter has a drinking problem. She lives in another town and kept it well hiden, until her husband told us. She is in outpatient program now. First meeting was last Sat. My question is: is there anything I can say or do to help her in this journey or an...	Bluelady	3	666	Sep 29, 2009 by abbyal
	In the Service to others (Preview) It has to be said that there are unsung heros on this board and I for one want to recognise them. They are the people who dedicate time and effort and work "backstage" for the good of others. We are so lucky here to have such people on this board to keep it safe from abuse. MIP has played an enormo...	Suzannah	6	543	Sep 28, 2009 by Suzannah
	Made it a "me" day.....my awakening (Preview) Well after a day yesterday of feeling off and making a BIG mistake at work, and having to work over to fix it all, I decided to make today a "me" day and took the day off to try and gather myself together a bit. I have been feeling off and struggling all week and it is showing in every area of my life...	shellyj123	2	545	Sep 28, 2009 by Hoot Nanny
	It REALLY is ok to use White Out!!!!! -Letting go of guilt and perfection... (Preview) Spent much of this weekend not feeling well, so while lying around I had some time to reflect on things a bit. I never sit still, have the hardest time with it and this weekend I had no choice.......think HP really just wanted me to slow down and take care of me for a bit. Before AlAnon I would have felt trem...	shellyj123	4	665	Sep 28, 2009 by penelope
	Is It Me? (Preview) I need some of your thoughts and experience please. The situation is that I was happily married for 18 years to my first husband. He died. Five years later I married my second husband. I had no idea he was an a. I figure it out in the 3rd month of our marriage. By the 6th month of our marriage the verbal a...	ditto	3	545	Sep 28, 2009 by maresie
	Newbie (Preview) Hi all. I am new here and pretty hopeless that things in my life will get any better, but coming to sites like this and reading about other people in the same situation as me makes me feel less alone. I am married to an alcoholic. We have two young children. AH's behavior is getting worse and worse. He drin...	SWgal	8	520	Sep 28, 2009 by maresie
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.