Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hi family, Tonight is the first night of Chanukah and for all of those out there that celebrate it I wish you a great week. I can't wait to make the latkes for dinner tonight . I am hoping to have a better year than last year. Last year on the last night of Chanukah I almost set the house of fire. It was an almost...

Carol_Lynn · Carol_Lynn

Hi. I'm Carol and my husband and I live with an a friend. He is sober now, but we are still dealing with issues. the good news is I have learned to be on my own and do things/take care of myself without his help anymore. This way, he is more likely to be able to help me. And I can help him when I am taken care of m...

White Rabbit · White Rabbit

Hi ... I'm new and this is my first post here. I'm not new to alcoholism. My mom is still an active alcoholic (she was for the majority of my childhood), my ex husband is an alcoholic, and my new husband is in recovery. That's a lot of alcoholism. I've been going to f2f Al Anon meetings for about a year and...

Diva · Diva

Just what COULD happen during detox? THis is a serious question; as most of you know, I had no experience with alcoholism or alcoholics before I became involved with former husband - now partner. His binges last anywhere from three days to a week, and the alcohol he consumes during this time is enorm...

Shaina · Shaina

My fiance has been sober for 6 months. We havent been intimate for 5 months. We always give a quick kiss when we see each other and quick kiss and hug when we leave. No matter if its 5 times a day. When I spent the night after a long trip, the next morning he wanted to do something fun. We got up and went fis...

Ragdolls · Ragdolls

I've been in a funk all day. I'm sure it has to do with lots of things but these are the things directly bothering me and I need to vent. Last night I woke up as my AFiance was digging in my purse for a lighter (so he says) to have a cigarette. Yes, I sleep with my purse by the bed now. If it makes me feel better,...

ARSK · ARSK

My first posting My ExABF was an immature alcoholic. This was a new one for me. I had the abusive ABF and an abusive A stepfather. SO I thought I was doing well. This guy drinks but hes a fun alcoholic, later to come to find a functional alcoholic as well. I had some how stayed away from dating anything r...

QOD · QOD

I think the subject line just about sums it up!!!! Wow! Stress of life, of the holidays, of financial woes, of the A's in my life! Calgon take me away!

Dyinginside · Dyinginside

I've tried and tried again, but I just can't NOT react to my ABF who is now sober, but who is just so irrational. I have tried to say to myself 'Ok, it's his illness, he's just learning how to cope with this world without a drink etc"......... But howmuch longer should I blame his rotting brain and may...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

Sorry I haven't been here much recently. I have been reading here and there and trying to keep up somewhat, but honestly don't feel I have anything to offer anyone right now. The past month has been so crazy, and I am fighting major depression daily. I'm sure it involves the time of year, missing what I t...

jasobel · jasobel

I felt like I was doing pretty good with my alanon program, detaching from my AS's behavior, letting go and letting god, coping with my obsessive thoughts, not worrying so much about him, taking control over my own self care and my own life. Then a close friend who has cancer found out her cancer is back....

Jerry F · Jerry F

Wednesday Night Turning Point Al-Anon Family Group...home meeting for me and to night very special as one of the members did the meeting on the subject of fear. It very quickly became fear using the tools of meditation and prayer. I am soooo grateful again for that meeting subject because of the memb...

Rora · Rora

I'm trying to figure out my being unhappy with my Sponsor. First, I think she talks too much ... about herself. I feel like when I am trying to discuss how I feel, she is looking at me, but waiting for the moment that she can jump in with a response. And sometimes my ideas are incomplete, then I have to int...

Priscilla83 · Priscilla83

As I posted a few weeks ago my husband relapsed. He is drinkng again, but since he hasn't done drugs yet he thinks he's in total control. He is obviously not, he drinks a lot, I guess he thinks normal people drink 6 days a week and have a glass of wine while cutting their hair I'm pissed right know cause he cam...

lolli09 · lolli09

Update on Need objective feedback, I ultimately called and left message that I agreed and he should take care of himself, take all the time he needed then his last message said he was soooo stressed over work and thought he might even be in a depression and he would contact me after the "Holidays&q...

John · John

Rose and John Freifeld Wish Every Member of Miracles In Progress a Happy Holiday! Photo taken 12-6-09 Toys for Tots Bikers Run - Wilmington, NC

blender_girl · blender_girl

...and not having much success. Anyone out there in MIP-land have a copy or point me to where I can get one? Thanks in advance! bg

lacewing · lacewing

Hello everyone! I would like to thank all of you whom offered up prayers for My friend and fellow Al-Anoner, Michael (HeSees) from our Chat room. He contacted me yesterday...is doing well, albeit 'feels like I have been through the mill'. He is up and exercising, walking up and down the halls, and ant...

RLC · RLC

If there is no problem with my computer or MIP then it has been almost 20 hours since the last topic was started from anyone. That has to be a first. And, for someone to tries to see the positive in everything I guess that "Ain't All Bad". HUGS, RLC -- Edited by RLC on Wednesday 9th of Decembe...

blender_girl · blender_girl

Something occurred to me yesterday - I've only really been trying to detach from my AH's "bad" behavior. You know what I'm talking about - verbal abuse, lack of interest in our kids' activities, overall irresponsible behavior etc... I noticed I got so wrapped up in his "Mr. Hyde&qu...

jdaniel · jdaniel

Hi, I'm new to this (just signed up) and need some advice. I've been to some al-anon meetings over the past few years but things are heightening. My mother is an alcoholic - has admited it in the past, but never engaged with recovery. Last weekend we went out for a meal, with 4 of us there, she was the only on...

maresie · maresie

There is a very good memoir out at the moment called "Lit" by Mary Karr. Mary describes her alcoholism, relapses and eventual sobriety insightfully and this was a revelation to me. I know while I drank socially I never depended on alcohol the way an alcoholic did. I also know that I made b...

Dyinginside · Dyinginside

http://www.livestrong.com/article/14712-developing-detachment/

AlaMom · AlaMom

It has been yet again so long since posting to this board. Time constraints & busy lifestyle I use as my excuses not to visit more often both on MIP & f2f meetings. Poor excuses not to take care of spiritual & emotional well being for sure. However, if there is one thing that I know is that I...

N8SMOM · N8SMOM

I have an outdoor Christmas tree that I bought last year - I had been wanting it for a long time and found it on sale for a great price. I decided to keep it in the garage after Christmas and didn't bother to take it apart. Unfortunately, my husband (while driving drunk) ran into it and ruined it (most likel...

jasobel · jasobel

Hi all - I haven't posted in a while but am back - had the stomach flu which was nasty. I have posted a bit about my boyfriend who left his sobriety, left me and went to live with someone else for 3 weeks on a huge drinking binge. Well now he is back living with me and sober and going to daily AA meetings. He is do...

Tattyhead · Tattyhead

HATE IT!! Hate what alcohol does to those addicted it to it. HATE what it does to those around the addict. AH was vomiting all day yesterday and, as a consequence had seizure/fit last night. Scared h*ll out of my poor son. I am getting used to them (HATE that I'm getting used to them) Did not call ambulance...

Debilyn · Debilyn

I went and saw my convict AH in the big house yesterday. He came out and looked different. Something was wrong. I have known him 39 years. I mean involved in every way. I asked about his cell mate if he had gotten out. He did. Then he turned bright red, I thought he was going to cry. I want you to know this man he...

essgee1952 · essgee1952

For the past few years, I've done the minimum when it comes to Christmas decorating. No help from AH, and fewer and fewer people coming by, even his kids. You know... Earlier this year, I reconnected with an old friend, who has been through some stuff the last couple of years and come out the other side...

Mandy123 · Mandy123

Hi family, I haven't posted recently. I have been a bit busy and trying to there is so much happening that I don't always know how to slow down the thoughts enough to get them to come out a few at a time let alone one at a time. Today was a weird day for me. I work for a social services agency. We provided case man...

supermom · supermom

Hello all. I have mentioned before that I am not the "tech-y" kind of person. What does "ESH" stand for? Thanks for the help.

inhisarms · inhisarms

I have lived my life on a roller coaster for 2 years. My xabf was and is the love of my life. He is the most amazing, intelligent, kind, genuine and loving person i have ever met when he is sober. Problem is he is an alcoholic/addict and becomes the exact opposite when he uses. He has done AA too many times...

smy922000 · smy922000

My husband is an active alcoholic. We have been married 17 years. He has tried a variety of programs, including AA and still drinks (he is not currently in AA). I have been to Al Anon but have not found that it helps me dealing with just interacting with an alcoholic. He wants to stop drinking but "c...

faith432 · faith432

Well I am new to the message board and to Al-Anon. I have been married to my A not alcoholic but ADDICT!!! He could be an alcoholic but his preference ...the preference that has ruined our life is CRACK. My A was clean and sober for 10 1/2 years 1994-2005. He gained his sobriety by accepting Jesus as hi...

QOD · QOD

It has been a really really long time since I have posted here. Life has been rolling along for me. I have been taking my ups and downs pretty well I think. Let's see, to sum things up: My exAH and I have been back to dating since Oct 2008. He lives with his grandma & I live in my house with our kids whom...

Nodaybut2day · Nodaybut2day

Hi all, I'm writing this because I have doubts about whether or not my X is actually an alcoholic or just an "alcohol abuser", as in someone who drinks heavily or moderately depending on the situation, but who is able to stop at some point. The reason I ask is because lately, since I have left m...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

So the ex AH has been staying on the upstairs couch for about 6 weeks now. I have had another issue with oldest daughter who will probably be going to wilderness camp within the next 2 months and because of that position I cannot in good conscience rely on her to take care of her younger brother and siste...

ally · ally

Guys As i continue to grow and find a new confidence in myself in ways i never believed possible. Life is what i'm finally allowing it to be for me. I'm not overly confident. I'm very easy going, down to earth and i love to laugh and make others laugh too. People call me the likes of "crazygirl or n...

Gailey · Gailey

I was not going to go to my meeting last night as I sat in my recliner with snuggly pjs on in front of my Christmas tree. I hate to go back out when I get home from work but this has been a very trying week for me with the A son and a lot of other things. I thought to myself...how can I keep tring to urge my son to go to m...

KellyCO · KellyCO

Hello to everyone - I have been going to a great weekly Al-Anon meeting for 9 months but am new to this forum. I would love to hear from anyone with ideas about how to talk to my kids about their father's alcoholism. My daughter is 10 and my son just turned 8. I only learned of my husband's chronic drinking...

mc3 · mc3

This is a strange question coming from a child of an A. My mother left him because of his drinking but I was to young to remember what he was like then. I am 37 and just in the past few years getting to know my father. I moved closer to him to build a realationship with him. He was forced to stop drinking for h...

gknee · gknee

Hi MIP gang- tonight I did a little personal history lesson and read ovey the posts I started since I joined MIP. WOW! Eye opening. It gives actual dates to the lurid details of life with my addict husband. I actually still loved him back 4 years ago..... So this next detail I could have cut and pasted from...

Tracy · Tracy

Hi everyone, wow living in reality is tough. My ABF has had a slip after 6 months and is living back in his mums. We are having contact via the phone. He is very upet, angrey, wollowing in self pity. it was his birthday couple of days ago I took a small present and card to his mums. He asked me to call back a...

Karilynn · Karilynn

((((Family)))), I am asking for prayers for the family of Richard Antoun. He was an anthropology professor that was stabbed to death yesterday in his office. He was 77 years young. He had more energy at that age than 100 of me combined. A sweet, gentle kind man who life touched many. I found out at...

shadow1 · shadow1

((((Family)))) I just wanted to say a great big THANK YOU for all your support, thoughts and prayers. I'm home from the hospital and doing well..... A bit tired but over all much better than I expected Take care Kim/Shadow

Tracy · Tracy

I really need to have strenght to be couragoues to take care of me for the first time in my life rather than everyone else. People have told me in the past that my kindness is my weakness. I do tend to understand another pain and then go into the fix it mode. However I have learnt from Al anon that we are a...

Dyinginside · Dyinginside

Hi everyone, I'm new to this site. I'll make a long story short. I've been with my BF for 5 yrs. We don't live together. The 5 yrs have been very volatile to say the least. I could not for the life of me understand why our relationship was so up and down. My BF drank, but he was never a fall down drinker or a class...

MaryPoppins · MaryPoppins

Dear Friends, I am feeling quite sad lately, crying a lot. Next week is my wedding anniversary, my sixteenth. For all of the first fifteen years we were married, my husband was a horribly hard drinking serious A. I am not talking weekend binges, I am talking daily drunkenness to the point of blackout...

maresie · maresie

I have a new therapist now and our first session went pretty well. I have a full three sessions before Christmas to get started on some topics. I am now having to take a lot of responsibility for permitting the last therapist to cross significant boundaries. I know I can go into people pleasing at the d...

Debilyn · Debilyn

Saying Relapse is part of being an addict, is true. It does not have to mean the addict is using again, they can also relapse into addictive behavior, which sadly almost always ends up with the addict using again. Relapse is a processs. The addict who has had a strong program for many years, starts to not...

RLC · RLC

To all my MIP family, I would like to inform you that my brother Ray loss his 6 month battle with cancer this past Thrusday. He fought a brave battle which was no surprise to me. He was given a military funeral and buried Saturday in the town where he and I were raised, Newton, Mississippi. Th...

Wife of A · Wife of A

Hi there I'm new here. I just don't know what to do. I have reached out to Al-anon before in terms of finding info. Right now, I feel like crap. I think my hubby is an A. Well, I know he has a problem. But he's a functioning one. In any case, I found his drinking to be a big problem. He would drink himself stupid e...

glad · glad

It just recently dawned on me, not sure why now. That during the first few years of our relationship anytime I would bring up a subject of intimate discussion- you know those conversations that most "normal" couples just have as they get to know eachother, beliefs, values and feelings- we...

fishinmama · fishinmama

Hi gang! Had a couple of rough days here. Struggling with making sense of my thoughts. I go from over thinking about the drinker in my life. Almost fantasy thinking, where nothing was bad in the relationship. Only thinking of the good times. At these times I am heart sick. Went I shake myself and t...

wifeofalcoholic · wifeofalcoholic

Her it is Saturday night. I worked hard all day. My husband was supposed to make dinner for me (his turn). I got home, said Hello, ....no answer. He was asleep on the recliner. (not a good sign - no dinner and asleep) I could tell by his speech that he had a small amount to drink. Some nights are much wo...

shellyj123 · shellyj123

First of all I'd like to thank Jozie and all of the prayers that were sent out for me on Friday....This is an amazing group of people and an amazing place. As those of you who follow my posts know, I have been stressing for weeks over the pre-surgery tests I had to have Friday. I don't have all the test resul...

cidiera · cidiera

I am facing a very hard decision. I've been with a man that I love very much for a little over 3 years, now. He has a problem with taking pain medicine, and it has escalated since I've met him. He's gone from taking one low dose vicodin every couple of months when I first met him to snorting 40 miligram per...

sdisnie · sdisnie

I'm just curious if anyone has ever experienced with the A in their life a way that they finally were able to control their drinking? For instance, say that the drinking was always out of control, affecting eveything, and then the got to a point to where they were able to drink and not get out of control an...

lolli09 · lolli09

Hi all, this is my situation. Me - 23 yrs sober AA, 15 yrs Alanon. He 15 yrs sober. We have been in relationship for 3 years, have had some fantastic times together... even a trip to Europe this summer. He has his home, I have mine. We live mostly independent lives, not glued at the hip but we have never...

ditto · ditto

Im not sure how I should have handled this situation. At the invitation of a client, I went to her house for a business meeting. The meeting concerned certain aspects of her house, so it is necessary for us to meet there to review items she wants. I have been to her home a number of times in the past and hav...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Happy Chanukah (Preview) Hi family, Tonight is the first night of Chanukah and for all of those out there that celebrate it I wish you a great week. I can't wait to make the latkes for dinner tonight . I am hoping to have a better year than last year. Last year on the last night of Chanukah I almost set the house of fire. It was an almost...	Mandy123	6	691	Dec 12, 2009 by Karilynn
	hello :) (Preview) Hi. I'm Carol and my husband and I live with an a friend. He is sober now, but we are still dealing with issues. the good news is I have learned to be on my own and do things/take care of myself without his help anymore. This way, he is more likely to be able to help me. And I can help him when I am taken care of m...	Carol_Lynn	3	758	Dec 11, 2009 by Carol_Lynn
	New and could use some of your ESH (Preview) Hi ... I'm new and this is my first post here. I'm not new to alcoholism. My mom is still an active alcoholic (she was for the majority of my childhood), my ex husband is an alcoholic, and my new husband is in recovery. That's a lot of alcoholism. I've been going to f2f Al Anon meetings for about a year and...	White Rabbit	5	837	Dec 11, 2009 by White Rabbit
	question about detox... (Preview) Just what COULD happen during detox? THis is a serious question; as most of you know, I had no experience with alcoholism or alcoholics before I became involved with former husband - now partner. His binges last anywhere from three days to a week, and the alcohol he consumes during this time is enorm...	Diva	9	732	Dec 11, 2009 by MrsGratitude
	Dry Drunks and Affection (Preview) My fiance has been sober for 6 months. We havent been intimate for 5 months. We always give a quick kiss when we see each other and quick kiss and hug when we leave. No matter if its 5 times a day. When I spent the night after a long trip, the next morning he wanted to do something fun. We got up and went fis...	Shaina	8	1081	Dec 11, 2009 by Shaina
	In a funk today (Preview) I've been in a funk all day. I'm sure it has to do with lots of things but these are the things directly bothering me and I need to vent. Last night I woke up as my AFiance was digging in my purse for a lighter (so he says) to have a cigarette. Yes, I sleep with my purse by the bed now. If it makes me feel better,...	Ragdolls	5	797	Dec 11, 2009 by phoenix
	New to this site (Preview) My first posting My ExABF was an immature alcoholic. This was a new one for me. I had the abusive ABF and an abusive A stepfather. SO I thought I was doing well. This guy drinks but hes a fun alcoholic, later to come to find a functional alcoholic as well. I had some how stayed away from dating anything r...	ARSK	3	726	Dec 11, 2009 by ARSK
	Oh the Stress!!! (Preview) I think the subject line just about sums it up!!!! Wow! Stress of life, of the holidays, of financial woes, of the A's in my life! Calgon take me away!	QOD	2	698	Dec 11, 2009 by QOD
	IMPOSSIBLE not to react!!!!!!!! (Preview) I've tried and tried again, but I just can't NOT react to my ABF who is now sober, but who is just so irrational. I have tried to say to myself 'Ok, it's his illness, he's just learning how to cope with this world without a drink etc"......... But howmuch longer should I blame his rotting brain and may...	Dyinginside	9	1179	Dec 11, 2009 by Dyinginside
	I really just want to give up........I don't know how much more I can handle.... (Preview) Sorry I haven't been here much recently. I have been reading here and there and trying to keep up somewhat, but honestly don't feel I have anything to offer anyone right now. The past month has been so crazy, and I am fighting major depression daily. I'm sure it involves the time of year, missing what I t...	shellyj123	2	974	Dec 10, 2009 by Aloha
	Finding peace in the program in a c (Preview) I felt like I was doing pretty good with my alanon program, detaching from my AS's behavior, letting go and letting god, coping with my obsessive thoughts, not worrying so much about him, taking control over my own self care and my own life. Then a close friend who has cancer found out her cancer is back....	jasobel	2	997	Dec 10, 2009 by jasobel
	The meeting was on fear... (Preview) Wednesday Night Turning Point Al-Anon Family Group...home meeting for me and to night very special as one of the members did the meeting on the subject of fear. It very quickly became fear using the tools of meditation and prayer. I am soooo grateful again for that meeting subject because of the memb...	Jerry F	5	1534	Dec 10, 2009 by Maria123
	I'm unhappy with my Sponsor... (Preview) I'm trying to figure out my being unhappy with my Sponsor. First, I think she talks too much ... about herself. I feel like when I am trying to discuss how I feel, she is looking at me, but waiting for the moment that she can jump in with a response. And sometimes my ideas are incomplete, then I have to int...	Rora	7	1150	Dec 10, 2009 by carolinagirl
	Tired (Preview) As I posted a few weeks ago my husband relapsed. He is drinkng again, but since he hasn't done drugs yet he thinks he's in total control. He is obviously not, he drinks a lot, I guess he thinks normal people drink 6 days a week and have a glass of wine while cutting their hair I'm pissed right know cause he cam...	Priscilla83	6	802	Dec 10, 2009 by blender_girl
	Update on "need objective feedback" (Preview) Update on Need objective feedback, I ultimately called and left message that I agreed and he should take care of himself, take all the time he needed then his last message said he was soooo stressed over work and thought he might even be in a depression and he would contact me after the "Holidays&q...	lolli09	6	872	Dec 10, 2009 by lolli09
	Happy Holidays! (Preview) *Rose and John Freifeld Wish Every Member of Miracles In Progress a Happy Holiday!* Photo taken 12-6-09 Toys for Tots Bikers Run - Wilmington, NC	John	7	864	Dec 10, 2009 by Karilynn
	Looking for "Mommy, What's Drunk" pamphlet (Preview) ...and not having much success. Anyone out there in MIP-land have a copy or point me to where I can get one? Thanks in advance! bg	blender_girl	5	1656	Dec 10, 2009 by blender_girl
	Update on my friend Michael - whom I posted asking for a prayer... (Preview) Hello everyone! I would like to thank all of you whom offered up prayers for My friend and fellow Al-Anoner, Michael (HeSees) from our Chat room. He contacted me yesterday...is doing well, albeit 'feels like I have been through the mill'. He is up and exercising, walking up and down the halls, and ant...	lacewing	4	737	Dec 10, 2009 by lacewing
	20 hours Since The Last Topic Started !! That's A First I Think? (Preview) If there is no problem with my computer or MIP then it has been almost 20 hours since the last topic was started from anyone. That has to be a first. And, for someone to tries to see the positive in everything I guess that "Ain't All Bad". HUGS, RLC -- Edited by RLC on Wednesday 9th of Decembe...	RLC	2	672	Dec 10, 2009 by canadianguy
	Detaching from the "good" behavior (Preview) Something occurred to me yesterday - I've only really been trying to detach from my AH's "bad" behavior. You know what I'm talking about - verbal abuse, lack of interest in our kids' activities, overall irresponsible behavior etc... I noticed I got so wrapped up in his "Mr. Hyde&qu...	blender_girl	7	1421	Dec 10, 2009 by Tracy
	An evening with my A. mother (Preview) Hi, I'm new to this (just signed up) and need some advice. I've been to some al-anon meetings over the past few years but things are heightening. My mother is an alcoholic - has admited it in the past, but never engaged with recovery. Last weekend we went out for a meal, with 4 of us there, she was the only on...	jdaniel	2	859	Dec 10, 2009 by Jerry F
	Recommendation for understanding the alcoholic. (Preview) There is a very good memoir out at the moment called "Lit" by Mary Karr. Mary describes her alcoholism, relapses and eventual sobriety insightfully and this was a revelation to me. I know while I drank socially I never depended on alcohol the way an alcoholic did. I also know that I made b...	maresie	5	923	Dec 10, 2009 by mc3
	Great info on how to detach (Preview) http://www.livestrong.com/article/14712-developing-detachment/	Dyinginside	9	1473	Dec 10, 2009 by mc3
	Sea of Chaos (Preview) It has been yet again so long since posting to this board. Time constraints & busy lifestyle I use as my excuses not to visit more often both on MIP & f2f meetings. Poor excuses not to take care of spiritual & emotional well being for sure. However, if there is one thing that I know is that I...	AlaMom	4	1070	Dec 9, 2009 by maresie
	Christmas Resentment (Preview) I have an outdoor Christmas tree that I bought last year - I had been wanting it for a long time and found it on sale for a great price. I decided to keep it in the garage after Christmas and didn't bother to take it apart. Unfortunately, my husband (while driving drunk) ran into it and ruined it (most likel...	N8SMOM	6	1106	Dec 9, 2009 by N8SMOM
	New Sobriety Behavior Confusing (Preview) Hi all - I haven't posted in a while but am back - had the stomach flu which was nasty. I have posted a bit about my boyfriend who left his sobriety, left me and went to live with someone else for 3 weeks on a huge drinking binge. Well now he is back living with me and sober and going to daily AA meetings. He is do...	jasobel	3	1229	Dec 9, 2009 by Jerry F
	Hate it! (Preview) HATE IT!! Hate what alcohol does to those addicted it to it. HATE what it does to those around the addict. AH was vomiting all day yesterday and, as a consequence had seizure/fit last night. Scared h*ll out of my poor son. I am getting used to them (HATE that I'm getting used to them) Did not call ambulance...	Tattyhead	6	1047	Dec 9, 2009 by Tattyhead
	?Another bad addict in prison situation. (Preview) I went and saw my convict AH in the big house yesterday. He came out and looked different. Something was wrong. I have known him 39 years. I mean involved in every way. I asked about his cell mate if he had gotten out. He did. Then he turned bright red, I thought he was going to cry. I want you to know this man he...	Debilyn	5	809	Dec 9, 2009 by maresie
	I Decorated For Me! (Preview) For the past few years, I've done the minimum when it comes to Christmas decorating. No help from AH, and fewer and fewer people coming by, even his kids. You know... Earlier this year, I reconnected with an old friend, who has been through some stuff the last couple of years and come out the other side...	essgee1952	8	856	Dec 8, 2009 by lolli09
	Giving what I can, and getting so much more (Preview) Hi family, I haven't posted recently. I have been a bit busy and trying to there is so much happening that I don't always know how to slow down the thoughts enough to get them to come out a few at a time let alone one at a time. Today was a weird day for me. I work for a social services agency. We provided case man...	Mandy123	1	563	Dec 8, 2009 by Maria123
	ESH question (Preview) Hello all. I have mentioned before that I am not the "tech-y" kind of person. What does "ESH" stand for? Thanks for the help.	supermom	1	444	Dec 8, 2009 by Mandy123
	The roller coaster came to a crashing halt (Preview) I have lived my life on a roller coaster for 2 years. My xabf was and is the love of my life. He is the most amazing, intelligent, kind, genuine and loving person i have ever met when he is sober. Problem is he is an alcoholic/addict and becomes the exact opposite when he uses. He has done AA too many times...	inhisarms	9	1281	Dec 8, 2009 by Dyinginside
	Confused... dry drunk behavior? Please help (Preview) My husband is an active alcoholic. We have been married 17 years. He has tried a variety of programs, including AA and still drinks (he is not currently in AA). I have been to Al Anon but have not found that it helps me dealing with just interacting with an alcoholic. He wants to stop drinking but "c...	smy922000	12	1718	Dec 8, 2009 by Dyinginside
	New to admitting I am co-dependant...WHAT!!!REALLY!!! (Preview) Well I am new to the message board and to Al-Anon. I have been married to my A not alcoholic but ADDICT!!! He could be an alcoholic but his preference ...the preference that has ruined our life is CRACK. My A was clean and sober for 10 1/2 years 1994-2005. He gained his sobriety by accepting Jesus as hi...	faith432	4	919	Dec 8, 2009 by Jerry F
	I'm Back!!! And boy has life been crazy! (Preview) It has been a really really long time since I have posted here. Life has been rolling along for me. I have been taking my ups and downs pretty well I think. Let's see, to sum things up: My exAH and I have been back to dating since Oct 2008. He lives with his grandma & I live in my house with our kids whom...	QOD	2	618	Dec 8, 2009 by QOD
	Can a drinker stop drinking? (Preview) Hi all, I'm writing this because I have doubts about whether or not my X is actually an alcoholic or just an "alcohol abuser", as in someone who drinks heavily or moderately depending on the situation, but who is able to stop at some point. The reason I ask is because lately, since I have left m...	Nodaybut2day	10	1418	Dec 8, 2009 by Nodaybut2day
	My latest dilemma (Preview) So the ex AH has been staying on the upstairs couch for about 6 weeks now. I have had another issue with oldest daughter who will probably be going to wilderness camp within the next 2 months and because of that position I cannot in good conscience rely on her to take care of her younger brother and siste...	carolinagirl	6	867	Dec 8, 2009 by Tenderheartsks
	I Have A Question (Preview) Guys As i continue to grow and find a new confidence in myself in ways i never believed possible. Life is what i'm finally allowing it to be for me. I'm not overly confident. I'm very easy going, down to earth and i love to laugh and make others laugh too. People call me the likes of "crazygirl or n...	ally	8	724	Dec 8, 2009 by Mattie
	my f2f last night (Preview) I was not going to go to my meeting last night as I sat in my recliner with snuggly pjs on in front of my Christmas tree. I hate to go back out when I get home from work but this has been a very trying week for me with the A son and a lot of other things. I thought to myself...how can I keep tring to urge my son to go to m...	Gailey	4	752	Dec 8, 2009 by Rita G
	How do I talk to my kids about their father's alcoholism? (Preview) Hello to everyone - I have been going to a great weekly Al-Anon meeting for 9 months but am new to this forum. I would love to hear from anyone with ideas about how to talk to my kids about their father's alcoholism. My daughter is 10 and my son just turned 8. I only learned of my husband's chronic drinking...	KellyCO	7	3032	Dec 8, 2009 by Nodaybut2day
	how do you convince your A, they are an A? (Preview) This is a strange question coming from a child of an A. My mother left him because of his drinking but I was to young to remember what he was like then. I am 37 and just in the past few years getting to know my father. I moved closer to him to build a realationship with him. He was forced to stop drinking for h...	mc3	9	1157	Dec 8, 2009 by maresie
	How do u extract the A from the house? (Preview) Hi MIP gang- tonight I did a little personal history lesson and read ovey the posts I started since I joined MIP. WOW! Eye opening. It gives actual dates to the lurid details of life with my addict husband. I actually still loved him back 4 years ago..... So this next detail I could have cut and pasted from...	gknee	3	903	Dec 8, 2009 by kitty
	letting go (Preview) Hi everyone, wow living in reality is tough. My ABF has had a slip after 6 months and is living back in his mums. We are having contact via the phone. He is very upet, angrey, wollowing in self pity. it was his birthday couple of days ago I took a small present and card to his mums. He asked me to call back a...	Tracy	4	833	Dec 8, 2009 by Dyinginside
	Prayers for victim's family. (Preview) ((((Family)))), I am asking for prayers for the family of Richard Antoun. He was an anthropology professor that was stabbed to death yesterday in his office. He was 77 years young. He had more energy at that age than 100 of me combined. A sweet, gentle kind man who life touched many. I found out at...	Karilynn	6	922	Dec 7, 2009 by wp
	Thank you!! (Preview) ((((Family)))) I just wanted to say a great big THANK YOU for all your support, thoughts and prayers. I'm home from the hospital and doing well..... A bit tired but over all much better than I expected Take care Kim/Shadow	shadow1	7	719	Dec 7, 2009 by wp
	courage (Preview) I really need to have strenght to be couragoues to take care of me for the first time in my life rather than everyone else. People have told me in the past that my kindness is my weakness. I do tend to understand another pain and then go into the fix it mode. However I have learnt from Al anon that we are a...	Tracy	2	783	Dec 7, 2009 by inhisarms
	I'm just so confused, I'm scared (Preview) Hi everyone, I'm new to this site. I'll make a long story short. I've been with my BF for 5 yrs. We don't live together. The 5 yrs have been very volatile to say the least. I could not for the life of me understand why our relationship was so up and down. My BF drank, but he was never a fall down drinker or a class...	Dyinginside	9	1135	Dec 7, 2009 by MrsGratitude
	Feeling VERY VERY sad, need help with this (Preview) Dear Friends, I am feeling quite sad lately, crying a lot. Next week is my wedding anniversary, my sixteenth. For all of the first fifteen years we were married, my husband was a horribly hard drinking serious A. I am not talking weekend binges, I am talking daily drunkenness to the point of blackout...	MaryPoppins	9	983	Dec 7, 2009 by MrsGratitude
	new therapist (Preview) I have a new therapist now and our first session went pretty well. I have a full three sessions before Christmas to get started on some topics. I am now having to take a lot of responsibility for permitting the last therapist to cross significant boundaries. I know I can go into people pleasing at the d...	maresie	3	900	Dec 7, 2009 by MrsGratitude
	Relapse is more than using again. (Preview) Saying Relapse is part of being an addict, is true. It does not have to mean the addict is using again, they can also relapse into addictive behavior, which sadly almost always ends up with the addict using again. Relapse is a processs. The addict who has had a strong program for many years, starts to not...	Debilyn	12	1874	Dec 7, 2009 by MrsGratitude
	Tribute To My Brother (Preview) To all my MIP family, I would like to inform you that my brother Ray loss his 6 month battle with cancer this past Thrusday. He fought a brave battle which was no surprise to me. He was given a military funeral and buried Saturday in the town where he and I were raised, Newton, Mississippi. Th...	RLC	8	1015	Dec 7, 2009 by tea2
	I'm new.. ish (Preview) Hi there I'm new here. I just don't know what to do. I have reached out to Al-anon before in terms of finding info. Right now, I feel like crap. I think my hubby is an A. Well, I know he has a problem. But he's a functioning one. In any case, I found his drinking to be a big problem. He would drink himself stupid e...	Wife of A	2	832	Dec 7, 2009 by canadianguy
	In case someone else has similar communication issues regarding trusting (Preview) It just recently dawned on me, not sure why now. That during the first few years of our relationship anytime I would bring up a subject of intimate discussion- you know those conversations that most "normal" couples just have as they get to know eachother, beliefs, values and feelings- we...	glad	5	1033	Dec 7, 2009 by DreamXL
	My thinking is a mess! (Preview) Hi gang! Had a couple of rough days here. Struggling with making sense of my thoughts. I go from over thinking about the drinker in my life. Almost fantasy thinking, where nothing was bad in the relationship. Only thinking of the good times. At these times I am heart sick. Went I shake myself and t...	fishinmama	5	1328	Dec 7, 2009 by DreamXL
	Feeling So sad and All Alone (Preview) Her it is Saturday night. I worked hard all day. My husband was supposed to make dinner for me (his turn). I got home, said Hello, ....no answer. He was asleep on the recliner. (not a good sign - no dinner and asleep) I could tell by his speech that he had a small amount to drink. Some nights are much wo...	wifeofalcoholic	6	1158	Dec 6, 2009 by Jerry F
	A new perspective.........Finding gratitude and serenity in the insanity of life. (Preview) First of all I'd like to thank Jozie and all of the prayers that were sent out for me on Friday....This is an amazing group of people and an amazing place. As those of you who follow my posts know, I have been stressing for weeks over the pre-surgery tests I had to have Friday. I don't have all the test resul...	shellyj123	1	815	Dec 6, 2009 by hotrod
	Facing a hard decision. (Preview) I am facing a very hard decision. I've been with a man that I love very much for a little over 3 years, now. He has a problem with taking pain medicine, and it has escalated since I've met him. He's gone from taking one low dose vicodin every couple of months when I first met him to snorting 40 miligram per...	cidiera	11	986	Dec 6, 2009 by GailMichelle
	Controlled Drinking.... Is it possible? (Preview) I'm just curious if anyone has ever experienced with the A in their life a way that they finally were able to control their drinking? For instance, say that the drinking was always out of control, affecting eveything, and then the got to a point to where they were able to drink and not get out of control an...	sdisnie	11	1545	Dec 6, 2009 by Holly09
	Need objective feedback (Preview) Hi all, this is my situation. Me - 23 yrs sober AA, 15 yrs Alanon. He 15 yrs sober. We have been in relationship for 3 years, have had some fantastic times together... even a trip to Europe this summer. He has his home, I have mine. We live mostly independent lives, not glued at the hip but we have never...	lolli09	9	1126	Dec 6, 2009 by lolli09
	The Other Side Of The Coin (Preview) Im not sure how I should have handled this situation. At the invitation of a client, I went to her house for a business meeting. The meeting concerned certain aspects of her house, so it is necessary for us to meet there to review items she wants. I have been to her home a number of times in the past and hav...	ditto	3	828	Dec 5, 2009 by Jerry F
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.