Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Rinn · Rinn

I am feeling really hurt and let down and disillusioned. I think part of me hadn't really accepted the idea that I can't change him, I thought deep down he would quit for me, that he loved me enough to do it. I know I felt that way when his addiction first became a par tof our marrige and I struggled when i ask...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

My sponsor has ear trouble, lost some of her hearing & is just over 40. I really feel for her. She went to the doctor today & has been diagnosed. I think that it will ge better---I hope so. It looks like she has a tumor. I hope there is no cancer. She is one of the most special women in my life. I don't kn...

NicoleDiver · NicoleDiver

Just read this on facebook and had to share, hope that's ok: "The problem is not the problem. The problem is your attitude about the problem." - Captain Jack Sparrow He he he......sounds like something I need to hear. Hope everyone's having a happy Monday. :)

PP · PP

Good morning all, I wanted to let you all know I will be gone for a week..am happily travelling to be welcome a new grandson to our family. Tomorrow is his birth day. I will miss participating in this valuable forum and wallowing in the inspiration it provides. Blessings to all.

el-cee · el-cee

I have now been a member of Alanon for 1 year. I am so grateful I found this amazing programme. It has given me back a few things that I lost as a direct result of living with alcoholism, I would like to share with you. 1. My ability to see the truth instead of choosing to live in a world of denial. This denial ke...

John · John

Emotions are a lot like being in water. When your emotions are overwhelming sometimes you feel like you are so helpless to do anything. You drown in the despair, the anger, the sadness, it pulls you under and you lose sight of the sun.You don't have to drown. Sometimes it's enough to just be still, to fl...

beckon11 · beckon11

Hi friends, I have a older sister that can wreck havic with my self esteem. Lucky she lives out of state.While visiting the family.She managed to do it again. Sum me up! Label me! Attack my very being. I have a fatel flaw!I only think about myself! I dont live in the real world/Just a world of emotion...

forestfairy · forestfairy

Just got back home today with my son. Big reunion with our dog. My spouse got a moving truck this morning and moved to a two bedroom apt. about 5 minutes away by car. It took the intervention of friends who helped him find someplace and then helped him move, and just talk sanity to him. We spent weeks in the...

John · John

It was 1998. I had been sober myself for almost 10 years. I called my AA sponsor one morning. My agf was missing in action again. I told him I called all the hospitals, the city and county jails, drove around in the early morning hours, checking her "spots" where she might be, looking for her car, I had...

dponlyme · dponlyme

I want to thank all of you here for making me not feel so all alone. I want to thank you so much for the inspiration and hope for my own recovery which you give. Woke up today feeling just terrible but thanks to reading the posts on here and some prayer I am feeling so much better. One day at a time.

JamesUK · JamesUK

I ask this question because of some of the posts ive read in here from other people who've had problems with their A's since they went into treatment, and my own experience of AA which has ruined my family basically. Since my A started recovery she has changed completely....but not in a nice...

Sincerely · Sincerely

My husband is home from inpatient treatment 6 days now. He's doing IOP & meetings daily. Only thing, I'm worried. He hasn't called his temporary sponsor that was arranged in treatment. He tried once, that's it. should I encourage him to try again? im not sure.

itsthatkellygirl · itsthatkellygirl

So the truth is...I am new here - I am so crowded and so alone. A little me background - In the past I have abused drugs and alcohol, to try to get out of my own head - to try to feel ok - to try to exist. Alcohol was never my thing, my alcoholic husband calls me one drink Lulu, I have ended up with alcohol poisoni...

rainlax · rainlax

My partner (3+ years sober) goes through periods that last about a week where he says he doesn't know what he wants in our relationship... as in, he doesn't know if he wants to be in it. This has happened just twice so far (since last year) and he tends to get over these "phases" just as suddenly...

phoenixmagicgirl · phoenixmagicgirl

Years ago when my AB used to drink and do drugs I was very grateful to be in another state whilst in college. (He's been clean for 4 years now). My AM has been drinking for 2 years and its gotten to hthe point where I'd much rather be anywhere (the gym

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

I am actually not working this Saturday morning so I am trying the new and easier to join 9 am morning MIP meeting and I got right in. Wow this is exciting for me and well I hope people like me who had issues getting in before will try it again. Thanks John for making it better and more accessible. I have the at...

shyrose · shyrose

Hi all, This is my first post here, and I'm curious to hear what you think. I've been in a steady relationship with a sober alcholic for around 9 months. She's got 3 years sober, including from marijuana, painkillers and of course alcohol. I don't drink, have quit smoking, and have given up smoking m...

flopadopilus · flopadopilus

Anyone have some slogans/Al-anon sayings that have stuck or helped them. I am trying to write up a bunch of them and put in a couple handy places to remind me to stay on track. Any and all are welcome.

1976love · 1976love

Last night my husband had to pull an nighter at work. After the kids were asleep I watched Iyanla Vanzant fix my life with rapper DMX. I could see his disease of addiction all over him. The way his eye's would roll when talking, the tears of how everyone hurt him, the anger and no room for love in his soul...

blondie99 · blondie99

Met with my boss today and she and the interview team chose to give the job to someone else rather than to give it to me as a promotion. I expressed that sure, I was disappointed, but the woman who got the job is a former colleague of mine and has been doing the work for the last two years, compared to my less th...

Sincerely · Sincerely

my strength and courage definately comes from my HP but recently, its also come from my aa husband. Before family weekend I've never really been good at speaking in front of a crowd. So fear of speaking at family day at in patient treatment was pretty high. As well as, speaking at a face to face alanon m...

texasgal · texasgal

My A has been going through a whirlwind of mess of his own making. I have pretty much left him alone since he relapsed and continued with my own life. A detective from the police station came looking for him. I just said I didn't know where he was (which is true cuz i never know where he is) and I gave him my A's...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I have posted this before. I guess I tend to repeat myself. I am concerned about the future & the money I might spend. Maybe I need a financial consultant. I am usually pretty wise when it comes to big things but huge things I have a hard time w/. So, now that I got that out of the way, I am doing A-OK. I have...

lorraine · lorraine

im new to this but goin through a lot of s*** that i hope someone out there understands. i met my boyfriend 18 months ago when we were both in treatment for alcohol abuse. i have been sober since but hes not been so lucky. we were just friends to start andhe started to drink and i distanced myself from him the...

Jerry F · Jerry F

for never have making this suggestion. Where the hell was my thinking. For the years I have been on this board and for the years that I have been the literature person in my home group and otheres; for the years that I have sat and listened to the subject of what alcoholism is doing to my marriage and fa...

4kidsmama · 4kidsmama

My AH has been sober for 6 months and things have been 10 times better. Except for one thing. He just will not lay off with the snide and hurtful comments directed at me. My cooking, my cleaning, my driving, my kids, my pets, my job. Whenever he has a bad week at work or isn't feeling good, he reverts b...

John · John

"In homes where relationship trauma or addiction is present, behavior may be inconsistent. The rules that apply one day don't always carry over to the next. The same rules that are laid down on Monday may no longer apply on Tuesday and then suddenly on Friday, Mondays rules may be applied as though t...

el-cee · el-cee

I think it's amazing that this program actually exists and works. I mean it is common sense really in lots of ways but for it to be so straight forward and clear. Did the people who wrote the steps and traditions know what an impact they would make? Also, it doesn't get enough credit. I know lots of people w...

atheos · atheos

I know that in general, "moving on" and "not letting others' behavior cause you unhappiness" are considered good steps towards recovery. But I don't think I'm ready for that part yet -- I think before you can move on from pain and anger, you have to be able to have them first! That...

Iman · Iman

I have been struggling for months with the decision on weather or not I need to leave my husband due to his addiction. I know marriage is supposed to be forever, however, i feel that when we married, part of the truth was left out. now we have small children that i need to put first, and it doesnt seem right t...

Temple · Temple

A few of the quotes from Iyanla Vanzant that I copied for me off the Internet this morning: "The only thing that goes on in your life is what you allow (underscored--I don't know how to do that) to go on in your life." "You gotta own your stuff, baby girl. You gotta own your stuff. It's no...

blondie99 · blondie99

I'm enjoying some time to myself today...was able to work from home in my PJ's and got dressed just long enough to go to a lunchtime AlAnon meeting. It was a good one - there was an older couple there who were newcomers. They look like they had been hit by a train. Lordy, do I remember looking and feeling tha...

phoenixmagicgirl · phoenixmagicgirl

My mom's best friend was telling me this morning that she and my AM were talking on the phone, my AM apologized for what she did and how she's been acting lately...my AM says she's too embarrassed to go to an AA meeting....maybe it's me being neive but what's there to be embarrassed about?! everyone in AA...

Sincerely · Sincerely

Words can not express how good my heart feels right now. I went & shared at a Face to Face Meeting today. This was the 3rd meeting i've been to in 12 years. The first one: 12 years ago, I could not speak, only cry. The second one: a few years ago, i was angry and i didn't need alanon, i needed to dump th...

NicoleDiver · NicoleDiver

I just saw this in a job posting on Craigslist (of course, I'm looking for my AH) and thought it was funny, and quite suiting when I think about my day: AH calls me at work from probation office this morning to say he failed the drug test (shocker - he was supposed to go yesterday but re-scheduled out of fea...

gigi1 · gigi1

Ok. I am almost new to this site..have been coming faithfully for over a month. But my demons are starting to kick in. All part of my dysfunction. Am I ok? Am I offending anyone. Are people starting to not like me. When I log on in the middle of the day and someone logs off as soon as my name appears, is it becau...

Jerry F · Jerry F

Not a he...a she. I didn't obey the rules and requirements when I first got here so when they said men on men and women on women I did exactly what was then expected of me...you got it. Her name is anonymous because that's how it works but her works helped save my mind and spirit, emotions and body. She...

gigi1 · gigi1

Last night at my F2F i learned something amazing.. We were reading from a daily devotions book and it was talking about us falsely feeling that we are the "victims". I realized and expressed that I am the victim- because I want to be. It is the dance I am used to!! Then i realized that it means-...

Number30 · Number30

Hello all. These past few days since AH entered rehab (Sat night) have been horrible, but I'm still alive! :) I've had panic attacks (first in YEARS), nightmares, crying fits, etc. etc., but last night was the first I've felt anger in a while. And it was GOOD! AH called Monday night, then didn't again un...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am struggling trying to remember what I said last time I posted on here. Oh well...I know I mentioned that I am trying to get eye surgery w/o insurance & w/ the money that we got from selling my dad & mom's house in March. It is going to be 3000 dollars an eye; one at a time. It is like cataract surger...

slogan_jim · slogan_jim

Hi, my name is slogan_jim and I am a grateful member of al-anon. The alcoholic that qualifies me for al-anon is my father. I just received a very interesting phone call from him that I feel is a breakthrough in both of our recoveries. I'll backtrack a bit. A few months ago my father was diagnosed with earl...

Alias · Alias

Hi. I am in need and uncomfortable discussing this with anyone in our community. I am not sure my situation is appropriate for this board so I apologize if it is out of place. My wedding dress is hanging right here in this room, which is locked because my fiancé is passed out drunk in the living room. W...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

Hi guys, quick question. I have been with my sponsor for about 9 months now. I'm slowly working step 4 right now. I constantly have a hard time reaching her. I know she has a lot of people she sponsors(probably around 10, at least) and I know her time is limited but I find that I can go weeks without get...

Lupo · Lupo

This may seem odd but I have been very disconnected spiritually for a long time. I was hoping someone might be able to recommend a book preferably a non denominational one that could help me to learn to pray and meditate. Thanks

stephaniej · stephaniej

After the wretched weekend I had recently (and thank you all again, for all your ESH on all of THAT), I am fighting hard for my serenity. The writing was definitely on the wall after my AH's last escapade. Now, as I formulate my exit strategy, my AH is in the midst of a lot of uncertainty. His union is pre...

Rinn · Rinn

I wanted to share a list of thing I value. I made it to pin on my bedroom mirror to see everytime I walk by and stay focused. It has been helping me to make decisions that uphold these values. If it doesn't work with in this paradigm, it isn't something making my life better it is just add distraction. It i...

tortuga · tortuga

Dear MIP family, I want to say where I am currently at. I know I haven't been back much lately posting. I wished I was ready to be more of a support to others, and I do come back alot to read the stories of each one of you, and they keep me so much more in th erality of things. They help me staying true to myself an...

ApparentlyNOTstupid · ApparentlyNOTstupid

I am very new to this board, and new to learning of the insane world of A, although not new to living in the insane world itself. Over the last two weeks I have read anything I can get my hands on.... researched, studied, you name it. After reading another posters thread yesterday, about her feeling ba...

LeenieBeanie · LeenieBeanie

I have been given by my violin teacher as a "homework assignment" a small, beautiful tune from Les Miserables to practice all week. Can you guess?? It's Drink With Me (to days gone by). There is no getting away from alcohol. Hope you all have a good week.

1976love · 1976love

After a while you get used to living certain ways. My AH has been steadily attending AA meetings and going on one day at a time. He recieved his 90 coin last week and I was happy to go and support him. Last night was the first time in about 3 months he decided to skip one night of meetings and stay home and fi...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Good Morning I just couldn't stand it anymore. My son is such a pig and his living quarters were a health concern so I went over there after work and put HIM to work. lol It took us 4 hours to get that little apartment cleaned but it made me feel better...and I think him too. Just to have a clean set of shee...

Rinn · Rinn

He fell asleep in his jeans and I tried waking him up and shook him, and felt something in his pocket and it was a well used meth pipe. I woke him up and told him to pack a few things I love him but it was time for him to go he needed to leave and sleep somewhere else tonight and for the foreseeable future. I was pr...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

I am traveling with my son right now in CA for one of his tennis tournaments and I had been having some great nights of sleep up until last night. As usual for when I travel, my AH has been sweet as pie on the phone and we act like one normal happily married couple. I keep ruminating over why I am so fearful of...

mom2mna · mom2mna

This seems like such a great community! I just wanted to say hello, and introduce myself. I'm married to an alcoholic, and I'm a mom to three little girls. Yesterday, my husband drank for the first time in a month and a half. I'm just so frustrated with it, the lying, the treating me like I'm stupid. I'm su...

dponlyme · dponlyme

This past week has not been a good one for me mentally but HP has really been there for me and today I am feeling good again. AW has been so completely negative about everything and that has been hard to deal with. Today got news that we are having our food stamps decreased but I count it as a blessing as this w...

NicoleDiver · NicoleDiver

So I get this email from my mom today telling me how it is a shame that I was fired from my job in 2010 because of my AH. Which was news to me. Yes, I got fired in 2010 but they never told me why, they just told me to leave when I got to work one Monday morning. And it just so happens that my AH had been arrested for...

Green Eyes · Green Eyes

Well, it's now been exactly three months since my AH passed away from complications due to his alcoholism. I'm still numb. We were in the process of getting a divorce when he suddenly died. My AD is still not in communication with me or her sister ever since her dad's memorial. She's only speaking to my o...

Jen61 · Jen61

It has been about 3 weeks since my AH drank. Has been nice but knew it would not last. It seems everytime something stressful comes up in his life he drinks. I could tell this morning that today was a drinking day and a few hours ago I confronted him. Why, I have no idea. It all goes downhill from there....

KSwiss · KSwiss

Last night while I was at my AlAnon meeting, my 14 yr. old blew up at my AH, his Dad over something stupid like laundry. My AH had to take a drive to cool down. My son told me that he was angry at his Dad for abandoning him while drinking in the past ( he has been sober since August but has no program). I told my son...

likemyheart · likemyheart

This morning checking my bank account as I do every morning, I see that my federal tax refund has posted, yea, I did my return right! (silly sounding, not happy I got the refund, but happy my return is ok and I won't get a letter from the IRS, weird eh?) And the thought it brings to mind is how it was when HE was...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	I really thought I could change him.... (Preview) I am feeling really hurt and let down and disillusioned. I think part of me hadn't really accepted the idea that I can't change him, I thought deep down he would quit for me, that he loved me enough to do it. I know I felt that way when his addiction first became a par tof our marrige and I struggled when i ask...	Rinn	14	544	Apr 16, 2013 by debhud
	my sponsor has ear trouble(prayers needed) (Preview) My sponsor has ear trouble, lost some of her hearing & is just over 40. I really feel for her. She went to the doctor today & has been diagnosed. I think that it will ge better---I hope so. It looks like she has a tumor. I hope there is no cancer. She is one of the most special women in my life. I don't kn...	Hoot Nanny	2	331	Apr 16, 2013 by ilovedogs
	Captain Jack Sparrow quote: (Preview) Just read this on facebook and had to share, hope that's ok: "The problem is not the problem. The problem is your attitude about the problem." - Captain Jack Sparrow He he he......sounds like something I need to hear. Hope everyone's having a happy Monday. :)	NicoleDiver	5	3318	Apr 16, 2013 by Peggy7
	Will be Gone for a Week (Preview) Good morning all, I wanted to let you all know I will be gone for a week..am happily travelling to be welcome a new grandson to our family. Tomorrow is his birth day. I will miss participating in this valuable forum and wallowing in the inspiration it provides. Blessings to all.	PP	13	406	Apr 16, 2013 by tortuga
	1 year down the line (Preview) I have now been a member of Alanon for 1 year. I am so grateful I found this amazing programme. It has given me back a few things that I lost as a direct result of living with alcoholism, I would like to share with you. 1. My ability to see the truth instead of choosing to live in a world of denial. This denial ke...	el-cee	16	503	Apr 15, 2013 by el-cee
	Emotional Self Care.... (Preview) Emotions are a lot like being in water. When your emotions are overwhelming sometimes you feel like you are so helpless to do anything. You drown in the despair, the anger, the sadness, it pulls you under and you lose sight of the sun.You don't have to drown. Sometimes it's enough to just be still, to fl...	John	5	447	Apr 15, 2013 by milkwood
	my sister delivers more creul emotional attacks!! (Preview) Hi friends, I have a older sister that can wreck havic with my self esteem. Lucky she lives out of state.While visiting the family.She managed to do it again. Sum me up! Label me! Attack my very being. I have a fatel flaw!I only think about myself! I dont live in the real world/Just a world of emotion...	beckon11	5	510	Apr 15, 2013 by Sincerely
	home again (Preview) Just got back home today with my son. Big reunion with our dog. My spouse got a moving truck this morning and moved to a two bedroom apt. about 5 minutes away by car. It took the intervention of friends who helped him find someplace and then helped him move, and just talk sanity to him. We spent weeks in the...	forestfairy	8	516	Apr 15, 2013 by forestfairy
	Just remembering.... (Preview) It was 1998. I had been sober myself for almost 10 years. I called my AA sponsor one morning. My agf was missing in action again. I told him I called all the hospitals, the city and county jails, drove around in the early morning hours, checking her "spots" where she might be, looking for her car, I had...	John	9	522	Apr 15, 2013 by milkwood
	Thank you all for being here with me (Preview) I want to thank all of you here for making me not feel so all alone. I want to thank you so much for the inspiration and hope for my own recovery which you give. Woke up today feeling just terrible but thanks to reading the posts on here and some prayer I am feeling so much better. One day at a time.	dponlyme	4	350	Apr 15, 2013 by milkwood
	Is AA worth really worth all the hassle?..it has destroyed my family as i knew it. (Preview) I ask this question because of some of the posts ive read in here from other people who've had problems with their A's since they went into treatment, and my own experience of AA which has ruined my family basically. Since my A started recovery she has changed completely....but not in a nice...	JamesUK	26	8378	Apr 15, 2013 by bryan
	My AA Hubby & his sponsor (his business, I know, well sorta) (Preview) My husband is home from inpatient treatment 6 days now. He's doing IOP & meetings daily. Only thing, I'm worried. He hasn't called his temporary sponsor that was arranged in treatment. He tried once, that's it. should I encourage him to try again? im not sure.	Sincerely	3	339	Apr 15, 2013 by PP
	Crowded and Alone (Preview) So the truth is...I am new here - I am so crowded and so alone. A little me background - In the past I have abused drugs and alcohol, to try to get out of my own head - to try to feel ok - to try to exist. Alcohol was never my thing, my alcoholic husband calls me one drink Lulu, I have ended up with alcohol poisoni...	itsthatkellygirl	4	499	Apr 15, 2013 by PP
	How to handle A's feelings? (Preview) My partner (3+ years sober) goes through periods that last about a week where he says he doesn't know what he wants in our relationship... as in, he doesn't know if he wants to be in it. This has happened just twice so far (since last year) and he tends to get over these "phases" just as suddenly...	rainlax	3	348	Apr 15, 2013 by tiredtonite
	Is it strange to do this? (Preview) Years ago when my AB used to drink and do drugs I was very grateful to be in another state whilst in college. (He's been clean for 4 years now). My AM has been drinking for 2 years and its gotten to hthe point where I'd much rather be anywhere (the gym	phoenixmagicgirl	7	327	Apr 15, 2013 by phoenixmagicgirl
	Meeting this morning (MIP style) my first one (Preview) I am actually not working this Saturday morning so I am trying the new and easier to join 9 am morning MIP meeting and I got right in. Wow this is exciting for me and well I hope people like me who had issues getting in before will try it again. Thanks John for making it better and more accessible. I have the at...	Breakingfree	3	274	Apr 15, 2013 by Breakingfree
	chronic pain, medical marijuana and confusion (Preview) Hi all, This is my first post here, and I'm curious to hear what you think. I've been in a steady relationship with a sober alcholic for around 9 months. She's got 3 years sober, including from marijuana, painkillers and of course alcohol. I don't drink, have quit smoking, and have given up smoking m...	shyrose	3	439	Apr 15, 2013 by shyrose
	Slogans and sayings- need some (Preview) Anyone have some slogans/Al-anon sayings that have stuck or helped them. I am trying to write up a bunch of them and put in a couple handy places to remind me to stay on track. Any and all are welcome.	flopadopilus	14	9388	Apr 14, 2013 by John
	what a show. (Preview) Last night my husband had to pull an nighter at work. After the kids were asleep I watched Iyanla Vanzant fix my life with rapper DMX. I could see his disease of addiction all over him. The way his eye's would roll when talking, the tears of how everyone hurt him, the anger and no room for love in his soul...	1976love	3	388	Apr 14, 2013 by Jerry F
	Ugh...didn't get the promotion :( (Preview) Met with my boss today and she and the interview team chose to give the job to someone else rather than to give it to me as a promotion. I expressed that sure, I was disappointed, but the woman who got the job is a former colleague of mine and has been doing the work for the last two years, compared to my less th...	blondie99	5	335	Apr 14, 2013 by likemyheart
	Strength & Courage (Preview) my strength and courage definately comes from my HP but recently, its also come from my aa husband. Before family weekend I've never really been good at speaking in front of a crowd. So fear of speaking at family day at in patient treatment was pretty high. As well as, speaking at a face to face alanon m...	Sincerely	4	295	Apr 14, 2013 by ilovedogs
	making the right decision for me (Preview) My A has been going through a whirlwind of mess of his own making. I have pretty much left him alone since he relapsed and continued with my own life. A detective from the police station came looking for him. I just said I didn't know where he was (which is true cuz i never know where he is) and I gave him my A's...	texasgal	10	437	Apr 14, 2013 by pinkchip
	where do I go from here(Part Two) (Preview) I have posted this before. I guess I tend to repeat myself. I am concerned about the future & the money I might spend. Maybe I need a financial consultant. I am usually pretty wise when it comes to big things but huge things I have a hard time w/. So, now that I got that out of the way, I am doing A-OK. I have...	Hoot Nanny	3	330	Apr 14, 2013 by tiredtonite
	hes at it again and i need to walk away (Preview) im new to this but goin through a lot of s*** that i hope someone out there understands. i met my boyfriend 18 months ago when we were both in treatment for alcohol abuse. i have been sober since but hes not been so lucky. we were just friends to start andhe started to drink and i distanced myself from him the...	lorraine	7	594	Apr 14, 2013 by John
	I apologize (Preview) for never have making this suggestion. Where the hell was my thinking. For the years I have been on this board and for the years that I have been the literature person in my home group and otheres; for the years that I have sat and listened to the subject of what alcoholism is doing to my marriage and fa...	Jerry F	6	436	Apr 14, 2013 by el-cee
	Is he a alcoholic or just an 'xxxx'? (Preview) My AH has been sober for 6 months and things have been 10 times better. Except for one thing. He just will not lay off with the snide and hurtful comments directed at me. My cooking, my cleaning, my driving, my kids, my pets, my job. Whenever he has a bad week at work or isn't feeling good, he reverts b...	4kidsmama	12	2277	Apr 14, 2013 by John
	Emotional Sobriety (Preview) "In homes where relationship trauma or addiction is present, behavior may be inconsistent. The rules that apply one day don't always carry over to the next. The same rules that are laid down on Monday may no longer apply on Tuesday and then suddenly on Friday, Mondays rules may be applied as though t...	John	9	4522	Apr 14, 2013 by forestfairy
	the founders of alanon (Preview) I think it's amazing that this program actually exists and works. I mean it is common sense really in lots of ways but for it to be so straight forward and clear. Did the people who wrote the steps and traditions know what an impact they would make? Also, it doesn't get enough credit. I know lots of people w...	el-cee	3	592	Apr 13, 2013 by PP
	How do you self-vaidate pain/anger? (Preview) I know that in general, "moving on" and "not letting others' behavior cause you unhappiness" are considered good steps towards recovery. But I don't think I'm ready for that part yet -- I think before you can move on from pain and anger, you have to be able to have them first! That...	atheos	5	507	Apr 13, 2013 by Breakingfree
	Legal options for separation (Preview) I have been struggling for months with the decision on weather or not I need to leave my husband due to his addiction. I know marriage is supposed to be forever, however, i feel that when we married, part of the truth was left out. now we have small children that i need to put first, and it doesnt seem right t...	Iman	11	499	Apr 13, 2013 by Breakingfree
	Iyanla Vanzant Quotes (Preview) A few of the quotes from Iyanla Vanzant that I copied for me off the Internet this morning: "The only thing that goes on in your life is what you allow (underscored--I don't know how to do that) to go on in your life." "You gotta own your stuff, baby girl. You gotta own your stuff. It's no...	Temple	4	2608	Apr 13, 2013 by John
	Quiet time (Preview) I'm enjoying some time to myself today...was able to work from home in my PJ's and got dressed just long enough to go to a lunchtime AlAnon meeting. It was a good one - there was an older couple there who were newcomers. They look like they had been hit by a train. Lordy, do I remember looking and feeling tha...	blondie99	8	606	Apr 13, 2013 by michael p
	my AM says she's too embarrassed to go to an AA meeting... (Preview) My mom's best friend was telling me this morning that she and my AM were talking on the phone, my AM apologized for what she did and how she's been acting lately...my AM says she's too embarrassed to go to an AA meeting....maybe it's me being neive but what's there to be embarrassed about?! everyone in AA...	phoenixmagicgirl	12	486	Apr 13, 2013 by phoenixmagicgirl
	1st Share @ Face to Face Meeting :-) AMEN! (Preview) Words can not express how good my heart feels right now. I went & shared at a Face to Face Meeting today. This was the 3rd meeting i've been to in 12 years. The first one: 12 years ago, I could not speak, only cry. The second one: a few years ago, i was angry and i didn't need alanon, i needed to dump th...	Sincerely	6	435	Apr 13, 2013 by grateful2be
	Leave your drama with your mama (Preview) I just saw this in a job posting on Craigslist (of course, I'm looking for my AH) and thought it was funny, and quite suiting when I think about my day: AH calls me at work from probation office this morning to say he failed the drug test (shocker - he was supposed to go yesterday but re-scheduled out of fea...	NicoleDiver	9	3086	Apr 13, 2013 by Breakingfree
	Me and my confusion with life (Preview) Ok. I am almost new to this site..have been coming faithfully for over a month. But my demons are starting to kick in. All part of my dysfunction. Am I ok? Am I offending anyone. Are people starting to not like me. When I log on in the middle of the day and someone logs off as soon as my name appears, is it becau...	gigi1	9	571	Apr 13, 2013 by Breakingfree
	First Sponsor coming into town... (Preview) Not a he...a she. I didn't obey the rules and requirements when I first got here so when they said men on men and women on women I did exactly what was then expected of me...you got it. Her name is anonymous because that's how it works but her works helped save my mind and spirit, emotions and body. She...	Jerry F	6	457	Apr 12, 2013 by Temple
	Victim (Preview) Last night at my F2F i learned something amazing.. We were reading from a daily devotions book and it was talking about us falsely feeling that we are the "victims". I realized and expressed that I am the victim- because I want to be. It is the dance I am used to!! Then i realized that it means-...	gigi1	4	503	Apr 12, 2013 by tortuga
	The good in anger (Preview) Hello all. These past few days since AH entered rehab (Sat night) have been horrible, but I'm still alive! :) I've had panic attacks (first in YEARS), nightmares, crying fits, etc. etc., but last night was the first I've felt anger in a while. And it was GOOD! AH called Monday night, then didn't again un...	Number30	8	462	Apr 12, 2013 by pinkchip
	what did I say last time? (Preview) I am struggling trying to remember what I said last time I posted on here. Oh well...I know I mentioned that I am trying to get eye surgery w/o insurance & w/ the money that we got from selling my dad & mom's house in March. It is going to be 3000 dollars an eye; one at a time. It is like cataract surger...	Hoot Nanny	1	338	Apr 12, 2013 by el-cee
	My Alcoholic has revealed something about his past. (Preview) Hi, my name is slogan_jim and I am a grateful member of al-anon. The alcoholic that qualifies me for al-anon is my father. I just received a very interesting phone call from him that I feel is a breakthrough in both of our recoveries. I'll backtrack a bit. A few months ago my father was diagnosed with earl...	slogan_jim	6	418	Apr 12, 2013 by lgnutah
	Getting married this summer (Preview) Hi. I am in need and uncomfortable discussing this with anyone in our community. I am not sure my situation is appropriate for this board so I apologize if it is out of place. My wedding dress is hanging right here in this room, which is locked because my fiancé is passed out drunk in the living room. W...	Alias	15	455	Apr 12, 2013 by Auntyaya
	Question about sponsors (Preview) Hi guys, quick question. I have been with my sponsor for about 9 months now. I'm slowly working step 4 right now. I constantly have a hard time reaching her. I know she has a lot of people she sponsors(probably around 10, at least) and I know her time is limited but I find that I can go weeks without get...	ilovedogs	6	507	Apr 12, 2013 by Jerry F
	Book for meditation and prayer. (Preview) This may seem odd but I have been very disconnected spiritually for a long time. I was hoping someone might be able to recommend a book preferably a non denominational one that could help me to learn to pray and meditate. Thanks	Lupo	4	482	Apr 12, 2013 by Lupo
	Turning it over to my HP (Preview) After the wretched weekend I had recently (and thank you all again, for all your ESH on all of THAT), I am fighting hard for my serenity. The writing was definitely on the wall after my AH's last escapade. Now, as I formulate my exit strategy, my AH is in the midst of a lot of uncertainty. His union is pre...	stephaniej	4	518	Apr 12, 2013 by Pushka
	Values as a paradiam for decisions (Preview) I wanted to share a list of thing I value. I made it to pin on my bedroom mirror to see everytime I walk by and stay focused. It has been helping me to make decisions that uphold these values. If it doesn't work with in this paradigm, it isn't something making my life better it is just add distraction. It i...	Rinn	6	650	Apr 11, 2013 by ClearTheFog
	Sorry for being under construction, but you are still all great! (Preview) Dear MIP family, I want to say where I am currently at. I know I haven't been back much lately posting. I wished I was ready to be more of a support to others, and I do come back alot to read the stories of each one of you, and they keep me so much more in th erality of things. They help me staying true to myself an...	tortuga	2	365	Apr 11, 2013 by hotrod
	BEFORE YOU GET DOWN ON YOURSELF- REMEMBER THIS (Preview) I am very new to this board, and new to learning of the insane world of A, although not new to living in the insane world itself. Over the last two weeks I have read anything I can get my hands on.... researched, studied, you name it. After reading another posters thread yesterday, about her feeling ba...	ApparentlyNOTstupid	3	412	Apr 11, 2013 by Hoot Nanny
	Had to Laugh (Preview) I have been given by my violin teacher as a "homework assignment" a small, beautiful tune from Les Miserables to practice all week. Can you guess?? It's Drink With Me (to days gone by). There is no getting away from alcohol. Hope you all have a good week.	LeenieBeanie	5	357	Apr 11, 2013 by Hoot Nanny
	oh my dreams (Preview) After a while you get used to living certain ways. My AH has been steadily attending AA meetings and going on one day at a time. He recieved his 90 coin last week and I was happy to go and support him. Last night was the first time in about 3 months he decided to skip one night of meetings and stay home and fi...	1976love	6	366	Apr 11, 2013 by ilovedogs
	I just couldn't stand it anymore (Preview) Good Morning I just couldn't stand it anymore. My son is such a pig and his living quarters were a health concern so I went over there after work and put HIM to work. lol It took us 4 hours to get that little apartment cleaned but it made me feel better...and I think him too. Just to have a clean set of shee...	Cathyinaz	14	819	Apr 11, 2013 by Path to Serenity
	I just asked my husband to leave (Preview) He fell asleep in his jeans and I tried waking him up and shook him, and felt something in his pocket and it was a well used meth pipe. I woke him up and told him to pack a few things I love him but it was time for him to go he needed to leave and sleep somewhere else tonight and for the foreseeable future. I was pr...	Rinn	19	3425	Apr 11, 2013 by PP
	Had a strange epiphany last night (Preview) I am traveling with my son right now in CA for one of his tennis tournaments and I had been having some great nights of sleep up until last night. As usual for when I travel, my AH has been sweet as pie on the phone and we act like one normal happily married couple. I keep ruminating over why I am so fearful of...	ilovedogs	12	597	Apr 11, 2013 by stephaniej
	Hello all... (Preview) This seems like such a great community! I just wanted to say hello, and introduce myself. I'm married to an alcoholic, and I'm a mom to three little girls. Yesterday, my husband drank for the first time in a month and a half. I'm just so frustrated with it, the lying, the treating me like I'm stupid. I'm su...	mom2mna	3	298	Apr 11, 2013 by PP
	HP is doing wonderful things for me today (Preview) This past week has not been a good one for me mentally but HP has really been there for me and today I am feeling good again. AW has been so completely negative about everything and that has been hard to deal with. Today got news that we are having our food stamps decreased but I count it as a blessing as this w...	dponlyme	2	323	Apr 11, 2013 by PP
	Blast from the past (Preview) So I get this email from my mom today telling me how it is a shame that I was fired from my job in 2010 because of my AH. Which was news to me. Yes, I got fired in 2010 but they never told me why, they just told me to leave when I got to work one Monday morning. And it just so happens that my AH had been arrested for...	NicoleDiver	4	398	Apr 11, 2013 by 1976love
	Three Months Later (Preview) Well, it's now been exactly three months since my AH passed away from complications due to his alcoholism. I'm still numb. We were in the process of getting a divorce when he suddenly died. My AD is still not in communication with me or her sister ever since her dad's memorial. She's only speaking to my o...	Green Eyes	5	361	Apr 11, 2013 by Jerry F
	I lost it tonight (Preview) It has been about 3 weeks since my AH drank. Has been nice but knew it would not last. It seems everytime something stressful comes up in his life he drinks. I could tell this morning that today was a drinking day and a few hours ago I confronted him. Why, I have no idea. It all goes downhill from there....	Jen61	7	404	Apr 10, 2013 by Jen61
	Trying hard to mind my own business (Preview) Last night while I was at my AlAnon meeting, my 14 yr. old blew up at my AH, his Dad over something stupid like laundry. My AH had to take a drive to cool down. My son told me that he was angry at his Dad for abandoning him while drinking in the past ( he has been sober since August but has no program). I told my son...	KSwiss	6	418	Apr 10, 2013 by Pushka
	Tax return (Preview) This morning checking my bank account as I do every morning, I see that my federal tax refund has posted, yea, I did my return right! (silly sounding, not happy I got the refund, but happy my return is ok and I won't get a letter from the IRS, weird eh?) And the thought it brings to mind is how it was when HE was...	likemyheart	3	715	Apr 10, 2013 by Jerry F
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.