Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Ms co-dependent · Ms co-dependent

Back in my Unsure mode. Ah sober 7 which I will stop referring to . ah . Has been out of my home for 30 days but not completely he would find a way to come back home for something . I had a long talk with him the other day positive ! I opened up and told him my inventory hmmmm was that a smart move on my half at the time...

nelson619 · nelson619

My girlfriend owns a bar and I am the head bartender at it too. Great job for an alchoholic I know! Sometimes she falls out with her business partner, goes on a bender and nearly closes the doors for good. We work predominantly all our shifts together and when a bender is finished and she is pissed off with...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

I was asked to watch the movie " Life of Pi " and how I can relate to the Tiger. I watched it this morning and I'm having a hard time with it. Don't know why but I can't seem to quit crying....Why? Is it because I need to live with life on Life's terms, that I can't control and that I have to let go? I...

ParisMemories · ParisMemories

It was hard, but today I kept the focus on me. He is doing what he does, but I am determined to find good in this day.

Harriet Zilber · Harriet Zilber

I have gone to several beginners meetings and found be wonderful wonderful, but regular meetings are troubling to me. Hearing the individual experiences and the pain that accompanies feels like a extension of my work day. Although I get a great deal from the teachings, it is not enough to overcome th...

Gaby · Gaby

I got a phone call from my son that is currently in rehab on Saturday and I was scared to talk to him because I felt I was going to have a complete break down after not been able to talk to him in 35 days. But he sounds great and after so long he also shared that he quit smoking. I believe in my heart he wants sobrie...

Bettina · Bettina

Suggestions when your not feeling your best: Open your life by finding ways to help others Expand the activities in your life. Be a positive influence wherever you go. Don't be a whiner. Don't dwell in the past. Look for solutions. Pray to expand your life force. Be convinced that everything is for...

el-cee · el-cee

I would like to share with you where I am right now. My son is still homeless, he has not sorted anything out in terms of housing because he has court, that has been ongoing since January, so he thinks it would be useless to get accomodation if there is a chance he will go to prison. I have not heard from him fo...

Jen61 · Jen61

I can see the affects almost immediately, I can smell it and taste it, but no I am not drinking. You must be mistaken. It is only water. Wow.

grateful2be · grateful2be

I went to work today. I went through the front door of the large historic building that I work in and parked my car on the side of the building close to the front steps. I do that because we have a circular drive in an inner-city neighborhood and it helps to cut down on folks using my drive to sell drugs. So...

giraffe13 · giraffe13

Going through the detachment process and really experiencing what it means is more complicated than I had anticipated. 1. My moods are just not the same for an elongated period of days or weeks. It is changing every day in terms of if I am happy and want to be around people, or sad. 2. And the types of actua...

Lyne · Lyne

My A went to pick up dinner 10 min from our house and was gone an hour and 15. And of course it's a place that has a bar and she has sat alone there drinking. The bad news is that I asked her if she was drinking and of course she denied it. The good news is that I stayed calm, there was no drama, and I don't believ...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

Something that Pinkchip shared with me recently has recently stuck with me: the statement in the subject: crazy is as crazy does. I don't know how many of you do this but I find myself still analyzing all of my AH's actions. It's infuriating that I waste my mental energy trying to figure out the actions...

Pushka · Pushka

It has been a peaceful day today the first one since last Friday evening and I am VERY grateful at this point. It's pretty sad when I realized that OMGosh .. today is the first day I haven't seen a deputy, been to the court house, gotten any texts OR had to deal with my atty. That's pretty huge. Instead of...

Jerry F · Jerry F

You all know I'm a double. You all know that I started in Al-Anon before entering AA. I took my Al-Anon program into those rooms or else. I am long past wondering or worrying how another alcoholic reacts to my programing. I know that guilt and shame on my part works wonders for their parts and soooo...

hotrod · hotrod

'http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t54066479/step-6-alanon/

Rose50 · Rose50

My son has relapsed (yet again) and had checked himself into the psych unit where he remained for 2 weeks. he was diagnosed with major depression and put on meds. Currently he's in inpatient facility for alcohol abuse where he's receiving counseling and attending AA meetings. He recently lost his j...

slogan_jim · slogan_jim

Hey Everyone, My father goes back to work on Monday after being on disability for depression/alcoholism. This time though he said he has a meeting with HR, his boss, his boss' boss and the rehab person from the insurance company that does his disability insurance. He sounded surprisingly upbeat abo...

PP · PP

To all of the men who are fathers in any capacity, here is a Happy Father's Day greeting to you....and thank you for your service.

Cherubhmm · Cherubhmm

I write on here rarely but I'm feeling upset tonight. My man has been doing brilliantly..or so I think. He has reduced his alcohol intake to 4 pints a night, a little more on weekends. Well he has had to. he has got into such debt after subsidising his drinking with payday loans that he is now in troubl...

MeTwo2 · MeTwo2

I recently posted on Attitude and how I perceived it so vague I couldn't even see the word clear. It was basically to me a negative feeling I was casting through the air. It Felt like a Major Defect, and who knows for me, maybe it is. I began to view it as what am I telling my mind. Am I constantly putting i...

AngieK · AngieK

I'm uncomfortable with this. My fella tried to get help, but they said they couldn't help because it wasn't daily. It's been a year, or so I think, but the results are no different- no keys, no wallet, a pocket full of receipts, at least this time no car which means someone dropped him off. Hours of worry,...

Bettina · Bettina

Everything passes. Both soaring joy and crushing sorrows fade away like a dream. However, the knowledge of having lived one's life to the fullest never disappears!

MeTwo2 · MeTwo2

assuming others have also had this experience ? needing ' emotional ' support. This weekend we have family in town that are very successful financial and status wise. They own a firm and are beautiful people and yet I see through the busy of making things look good. On the surface, everything looks...

Ms co-dependent · Ms co-dependent

My ah sober 7 months has been a little better to deal with. With him not here in the home I'm able to function and think on my own. My emotions still are up and down but I seem to catch it fast enought to control them.. The lack of al Alon meetings I have not been attending do to child care I still go up in my room an...

lgnutah · lgnutah

I have a dear friend who I don't get to see as often as I like. She and I met today, and she told me she learned a coping technique at her AlAnon meeting which I thought sounded like one I can try. (Disclaimer: I didn't attend the F2F meeting, so might not have the technique down pat) She said: when you are g...

John · John

Hello Everyone, I am scared. I doubt most will understand the depths of despair i am in and feeling. I have never been a big man. The most i have ever weighed was 142 lbs at 5"11'. I have worn a size 32 pant in the waist since my early 20's. Now, i am 54 and in the last 2 years i lost 24 lbs, 4 pant sizes for an a...

Jerry F · Jerry F

Why fear it now. Trust God...clean house...help others. My mind was trying to give me cause to fear and panic while I was working yesterday doing labor in my yard. I got to revisit an event which happened after and as a result of being in a head-on accident. When the EMTs came to take me out of the wreck...

Pushka · Pushka

Since I have been living at the court house recently it's been very entertaining to say the least. I love to people watch and then it's funny as you see the same people as far as law enforcement and people who work there, it's an interesting system. It's not always fair and it's not always just, .. at lea...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

So day by day it gets easier to recover from anything! Today it is my vision; tomorrow it will be something else but I am ready to face whatever comes my way! For all who don't know this has been quite of road of recovery for me. I have been in & out of this program for many years. I am just now learning how t...

rehprof · rehprof

so...today the exA stopped by to put up a heavy bag for my 16yo son. After the job was done he asked my son to go out in the driveway...I heard a pop-pop -- he was showing my son his that his silencer is now made to fit on his .22. There is always this subtle message of violence...and I hate it. He knows I hate gun...

Pushka · Pushka

Things are moving along at expedited speeds and that is a good thing. There is another pre-trial date in about 4 weeks which means I will meet with STBAX, his atty and mine in the next two weeks. At least I think so .. I am grateful that there is an end date and all of a sudden things got REALLY serious. T...

abbyalana · abbyalana

I am not sure what to do. My exah has supervised visitation which is also what our 12 yo daughter wants/is comfortable with. BUT he continues to break boundaries and I am not sure how far to push back. Last night he gt a new cell number & contacted her drunk & told her to keep it a secret from me. She s...

IrishMama6 · IrishMama6

This is my first post. I am scared. My Therapist said 'Go to an Al-Anon meeting. It will help." I'm afraid to go. I'm afraid AH and I will fight. He's a weekend binge drinker. He's done this his whole life. He was raised around it. When you're not working you drink. He doesn't do it during t...

Jozie · Jozie

In an Unbalanced World... How is it that in this Disease it seems the only time i Feel my Feet Safely planted on the ground is when i am surrounded by Chaos? I don't get it... When things pop Up and I Have No Time to 'Over Think it' It seems it rolls smoother, but when i take the time to Respond instead of React,...

newgirl17 · newgirl17

My husband has been sober for a few years he had been going to meetings faithfully. I just found out that he has been lying about going to meetings. He has been going to "meetings" and working steps with newcomers. I confronted my husband about it and asked him where he had been. At first he sai...

4st7lb · 4st7lb

I feel like the 12 step and AA which is touted as the only way to stop drugs and drinking when you are bad off is too heavily centered around the Christian Faith. for someone like me who doesn't believe in any religion whatsoever there is no difference between us and animals and no paranormal outsider is g...

Lyne · Lyne

I've tried to explain some issues to my A as clearly and detailed as possible, and without hostility. She doesn't get it, doesn't want to get it, got it and blocked it right out, or speaks some other language than myself. I honestly think I can communicate better with my 2 yr old granddaughter! A's ar...

ms1414 · ms1414

I will be married to my AH for 27 years next month. We have been together since the age of 13 and were married and had two boys by the age of 21. He became an alcoholic going on 6 years now, when his brother died of a sudden heart attack, who also was an alcoholic. We did the counseling three years ago, he gave t...

samc · samc

Hi everyone! I'm still pretty new here, read a lot and post little - which is unlike my RL; I talk a LOT. :) I thought I'd share a little about some progress I have made. As a child, one of my survival mechanisms was escapism. I had an active imagination, and loved to spend hours playing alone, making up frie...

kadyyo · kadyyo

Honestly, I don't even know where to being. Unfortunately this will be longwinded. Alcohol is baffling, cunning, powerful and so is my love for my alcoholic boyfriend, but is love sometimes not enough? I have been dating my alcoholic boyfriend for 3 years this July. Over these few years I have been th...

Linda77 · Linda77

I don't want to go home. My son lost another job last week. He is 35 years old and his alcoholism is getting worse. He knows this, and yesterday he told a neighbor he would go to an AA meeting this Thursday. But, since he lost this job last week, each day he's gets meaner. I've been divorced since 1989 and alw...

lgnutah · lgnutah

My husband is an alcoholic. He has been arrested for DUI, and many many more times, drank and drove but wasn't caught. Throughout our lives together, he was usually drunk when I needed him (so he was unavailable). He never got help, or went to AA, but one day our adult son went to his workplace and foun...

kris1109 · kris1109

I am new to this message board. Reading some of the posts here is the first time I haven't felt like I am alone in so long. Not that I wish this chaos on any of you, but it sure does help to know that there are people who get it. I have been dealing with my A for 13 years to varying degrees. We have a child togeth...

MeTwo2 · MeTwo2

for years I was told (anytime I expressed my own opinion, which at times was what others didn't want to hear, I was told I had an attitude. This grew so big through the years that I felt attitude was based on feelings. all I knew is I thought there was something truly wrong with me, such as, I was difficul...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

This is an unspoken boundary, mainly because it's against the law for AH to do what he did anyway. I went away for the weekend and AH found my spare key and drove my car this past weekend. I always write down the mileage when I go away, it's been a habit of mine for a year now and yes, there have been other tim...

DebLisa55 · DebLisa55

I have not posted here in a long time. I have no clue what to do. My life has not changed - it has gotten worse. My husband is still the drinking, sneaky, lying, SOB he was before. He is an addict, he needs help, he cannot do this on his own. Until he finds that illusive help, he will continue to destroy hi...

Bettina · Bettina

"Never be defeated by the visible" -- Edited by Bettina on Tuesday 11th of June 2013 07:20:57 PM

wornoutmrsfixit · wornoutmrsfixit

I was so down when I posted this morning. Little sleep, a headache from crying, swollen eyes and a dread of the day to come. In the past my AH's detoxes and been extremely hard. Day 1 is seizures and 2 & 3 get progressively worse with hallucenations and violent outbursts causing restraints to have to...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

As I work my program and find out more about myself I see a really bad side of me. I hurt this morning and having a hard time forgiving myself. Sometimes it seems I will never get to a point to be able to make amends to anyone in my life. Just got to say it's hard to think about all my wrongs and problems and try...

Bettina · Bettina

I found out yesterday that my X A is in ICU and in critical condition. He had been missing in action for a few weeks. He has nobody, just a few celeb friends in AA he hangs with, but nobody substantial. He has been living in his car for almost 2 years and somebody found him unresponsive and took him to the E.R....

axtella · axtella

I'm new here but not new to living with an AH mixed with pot. I'm broken this week as AH added his old drug of choice (Coke) back in the mix, stayed out all night and blew alot of money. Drugs, booze and strippers. We have been together for 11 years and this is the first time he has used COKE since we have been to...

wornoutmrsfixit · wornoutmrsfixit

The AH was released from the hospital today on his 3rd day of detox because he refused treatment. The old danger to himself and others got me nowhere. I talked to the psych ward and got nowhere. I refused to pick him up and so did our sons. He said he had no clothes to wear home and I again refused to bring any s...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

OK.....there's the deal I was told last week I was obsessing about my weight and dieting and I have to get over it. I didn't think I was but OK. Now I'm upset and obsessing about the person that told me I was obsessing and can't seem to stop. I understood what she said about making a lifestyle change or...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I am going to take a go on this but it might not be easy. One eye is out of the way making room for the other. I am using reading glasses for the first time on this computer. I can barely see on my tablet so I am going to keep trying to give it a go on here. I miss all of you as I have been recovering from my surgery for 6...

Ms S · Ms S

Last week I posted here about wanting things to change. I took some action and found a room to rent. I have been mulling this over. I have told my A b/f as he asked me this evening if I was planning to leave, and if so, could I just tell him. So I did. He hadn't drunk since last weekends big rant. And of cour...

Sheila F · Sheila F

I have been a member for more than 20 yeas. I have a 37 year old high functioning disabled son who also has a dealing conviction. He has not been able to find a job once he was laid off two years ago. He moved back home 9 months ago. We live in the country with no public transportation. He is becoming desp...

someonestolemyalias · someonestolemyalias

I am not sure angry is the proper term but I can't think of the word I am looking for. I have lurked on this message board for a while but this is my first time posting. My sister is an alcoholic. She hit her rock bottom Jan 2012. Her daughter (five at the time, seven now) was taken away from her and I permanent l...

ParisMemories · ParisMemories

Next week I will be away for 2 nights for work. The last time I traveled, AH went crazy, drinking, drugging, etc. That was 6 mos ago, 2 detoxes, and almost 60 AA meetings for him since. I have to remember that I cant control cure or cause it. He will do what he is going to do. I am justfeeling anxious about it to...

Gaby · Gaby

I tried reaching out to my son that is in recovery but I chosed to speak with his pastor instead of my son. I feel that even hearing his voice will hurt me and bring up emotions that I can't handle right now. Is it bad for me to be angry hurt fustrated towards him still for all that he has done to me and my family e...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	My feeling change like the wind (Preview) Back in my Unsure mode. Ah sober 7 which I will stop referring to . ah . Has been out of my home for 30 days but not completely he would find a way to come back home for something . I had a long talk with him the other day positive ! I opened up and told him my inventory hmmmm was that a smart move on my half at the time...	Ms co-dependent	10	733	Jun 18, 2013 by Ms co-dependent
	Am I enabling? enabling work conflict arguments stress (Preview) My girlfriend owns a bar and I am the head bartender at it too. Great job for an alchoholic I know! Sometimes she falls out with her business partner, goes on a bender and nearly closes the doors for good. We work predominantly all our shifts together and when a bender is finished and she is pissed off with...	nelson619	9	8334	Jun 18, 2013 by Mattie
	Life of PI (Preview) I was asked to watch the movie " Life of Pi " and how I can relate to the Tiger. I watched it this morning and I'm having a hard time with it. Don't know why but I can't seem to quit crying....Why? Is it because I need to live with life on Life's terms, that I can't control and that I have to let go? I...	Cathyinaz	12	588	Jun 18, 2013 by Temple
	Good day (Preview) It was hard, but today I kept the focus on me. He is doing what he does, but I am determined to find good in this day.	ParisMemories	6	407	Jun 18, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	Psychologist needing Al Anon (Preview) I have gone to several beginners meetings and found be wonderful wonderful, but regular meetings are troubling to me. Hearing the individual experiences and the pain that accompanies feels like a extension of my work day. Although I get a great deal from the teachings, it is not enough to overcome th...	Harriet Zilber	18	825	Jun 18, 2013 by tiredtonite
	A phone call... (Preview) I got a phone call from my son that is currently in rehab on Saturday and I was scared to talk to him because I felt I was going to have a complete break down after not been able to talk to him in 35 days. But he sounds great and after so long he also shared that he quit smoking. I believe in my heart he wants sobrie...	Gaby	13	538	Jun 18, 2013 by tiredtonite
	Create Value with everything you do.! (Preview) Suggestions when your not feeling your best: Open your life by finding ways to help others Expand the activities in your life. Be a positive influence wherever you go. Don't be a whiner. Don't dwell in the past. Look for solutions. Pray to expand your life force. Be convinced that everything is for...	Bettina	5	294	Jun 18, 2013 by Jerry F
	Mixed feelings (Preview) I would like to share with you where I am right now. My son is still homeless, he has not sorted anything out in terms of housing because he has court, that has been ongoing since January, so he thinks it would be useless to get accomodation if there is a chance he will go to prison. I have not heard from him fo...	el-cee	8	419	Jun 18, 2013 by Gaby
	I must have stupid on my forehead (Preview) I can see the affects almost immediately, I can smell it and taste it, but no I am not drinking. You must be mistaken. It is only water. Wow.	Jen61	14	627	Jun 18, 2013 by Jen61
	A stranger on my back porch (Preview) I went to work today. I went through the front door of the large historic building that I work in and parked my car on the side of the building close to the front steps. I do that because we have a circular drive in an inner-city neighborhood and it helps to cut down on folks using my drive to sell drugs. So...	grateful2be	7	550	Jun 18, 2013 by el-cee
	Detachment is complex (Preview) Going through the detachment process and really experiencing what it means is more complicated than I had anticipated. 1. My moods are just not the same for an elongated period of days or weeks. It is changing every day in terms of if I am happy and want to be around people, or sad. 2. And the types of actua...	giraffe13	14	497	Jun 17, 2013 by grateful2be
	slight set back tonight (Preview) My A went to pick up dinner 10 min from our house and was gone an hour and 15. And of course it's a place that has a bar and she has sat alone there drinking. The bad news is that I asked her if she was drinking and of course she denied it. The good news is that I stayed calm, there was no drama, and I don't believ...	Lyne	5	312	Jun 17, 2013 by Bettina
	Crazy is as crazy does (Preview) Something that Pinkchip shared with me recently has recently stuck with me: the statement in the subject: crazy is as crazy does. I don't know how many of you do this but I find myself still analyzing all of my AH's actions. It's infuriating that I waste my mental energy trying to figure out the actions...	ilovedogs	6	472	Jun 17, 2013 by abbyalana
	Peace and quiet ... (Preview) It has been a peaceful day today the first one since last Friday evening and I am VERY grateful at this point. It's pretty sad when I realized that OMGosh .. today is the first day I haven't seen a deputy, been to the court house, gotten any texts OR had to deal with my atty. That's pretty huge. Instead of...	Pushka	5	472	Jun 17, 2013 by grateful2be
	Do as I practice doing... (Preview) You all know I'm a double. You all know that I started in Al-Anon before entering AA. I took my Al-Anon program into those rooms or else. I am long past wondering or worrying how another alcoholic reacts to my programing. I know that guilt and shame on my part works wonders for their parts and soooo...	Jerry F	4	333	Jun 17, 2013 by WorkingThroughIt
	Step 6 (Preview) 'http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t54066479/step-6-alanon/	hotrod	0	332	Jun 16, 2013 by hotrod
	Your ESH needed - please (Preview) My son has relapsed (yet again) and had checked himself into the psych unit where he remained for 2 weeks. he was diagnosed with major depression and put on meds. Currently he's in inpatient facility for alcohol abuse where he's receiving counseling and attending AA meetings. He recently lost his j...	Rose50	12	436	Jun 16, 2013 by MeTwo2
	Dad goes back to work Mondayh (Preview) Hey Everyone, My father goes back to work on Monday after being on disability for depression/alcoholism. This time though he said he has a meeting with HR, his boss, his boss' boss and the rehab person from the insurance company that does his disability insurance. He sounded surprisingly upbeat abo...	slogan_jim	12	478	Jun 16, 2013 by grateful2be
	Father's Day (Preview) To all of the men who are fathers in any capacity, here is a Happy Father's Day greeting to you....and thank you for your service.	PP	4	333	Jun 16, 2013 by Jerry F
	Just checking in..life hard today (Preview) I write on here rarely but I'm feeling upset tonight. My man has been doing brilliantly..or so I think. He has reduced his alcohol intake to 4 pints a night, a little more on weekends. Well he has had to. he has got into such debt after subsidising his drinking with payday loans that he is now in troubl...	Cherubhmm	3	336	Jun 16, 2013 by PP
	Self defeating Attitudes (Preview) I recently posted on Attitude and how I perceived it so vague I couldn't even see the word clear. It was basically to me a negative feeling I was casting through the air. It Felt like a Major Defect, and who knows for me, maybe it is. I began to view it as what am I telling my mind. Am I constantly putting i...	MeTwo2	6	561	Jun 16, 2013 by MeTwo2
	need to connect (Preview) I'm uncomfortable with this. My fella tried to get help, but they said they couldn't help because it wasn't daily. It's been a year, or so I think, but the results are no different- no keys, no wallet, a pocket full of receipts, at least this time no car which means someone dropped him off. Hours of worry,...	AngieK	5	318	Jun 16, 2013 by grateful2be
	INSPIRATIONAL THOUGHTS (Preview) Everything passes. Both soaring joy and crushing sorrows fade away like a dream. However, the knowledge of having lived one's life to the fullest never disappears!	Bettina	7	314	Jun 15, 2013 by slogan_jim
	help .. status's (Preview) assuming others have also had this experience ? needing ' emotional ' support. This weekend we have family in town that are very successful financial and status wise. They own a firm and are beautiful people and yet I see through the busy of making things look good. On the surface, everything looks...	MeTwo2	3	342	Jun 15, 2013 by MeTwo2
	How to tell my AH I'm not ready yet (Preview) My ah sober 7 months has been a little better to deal with. With him not here in the home I'm able to function and think on my own. My emotions still are up and down but I seem to catch it fast enought to control them.. The lack of al Alon meetings I have not been attending do to child care I still go up in my room an...	Ms co-dependent	6	757	Jun 15, 2013 by grateful2be
	AlAnon technique for coping (Preview) I have a dear friend who I don't get to see as often as I like. She and I met today, and she told me she learned a coping technique at her AlAnon meeting which I thought sounded like one I can try. (Disclaimer: I didn't attend the F2F meeting, so might not have the technique down pat) She said: when you are g...	lgnutah	4	408	Jun 15, 2013 by el-cee
	I am such a mess! (Preview) Hello Everyone, I am scared. I doubt most will understand the depths of despair i am in and feeling. I have never been a big man. The most i have ever weighed was 142 lbs at 5"11'. I have worn a size 32 pant in the waist since my early 20's. Now, i am 54 and in the last 2 years i lost 24 lbs, 4 pant sizes for an a...	John	35	2368	Jun 14, 2013 by Pushka
	If it isn't happening now... (Preview) Why fear it now. Trust God...clean house...help others. My mind was trying to give me cause to fear and panic while I was working yesterday doing labor in my yard. I got to revisit an event which happened after and as a result of being in a head-on accident. When the EMTs came to take me out of the wreck...	Jerry F	9	467	Jun 14, 2013 by Jozie
	Funny New Court Story - The God of my understanding (Preview) Since I have been living at the court house recently it's been very entertaining to say the least. I love to people watch and then it's funny as you see the same people as far as law enforcement and people who work there, it's an interesting system. It's not always fair and it's not always just, .. at lea...	Pushka	5	538	Jun 14, 2013 by Jackie11
	day by day it gets easier(so I think I will hang in) (Preview) So day by day it gets easier to recover from anything! Today it is my vision; tomorrow it will be something else but I am ready to face whatever comes my way! For all who don't know this has been quite of road of recovery for me. I have been in & out of this program for many years. I am just now learning how t...	Hoot Nanny	3	477	Jun 14, 2013 by hotrod
	What to do? (Preview) so...today the exA stopped by to put up a heavy bag for my 16yo son. After the job was done he asked my son to go out in the driveway...I heard a pop-pop -- he was showing my son his that his silencer is now made to fit on his .22. There is always this subtle message of violence...and I hate it. He knows I hate gun...	rehprof	10	529	Jun 14, 2013 by lgnutah
	Court Update .. (Preview) Things are moving along at expedited speeds and that is a good thing. There is another pre-trial date in about 4 weeks which means I will meet with STBAX, his atty and mine in the next two weeks. At least I think so .. I am grateful that there is an end date and all of a sudden things got REALLY serious. T...	Pushka	8	442	Jun 14, 2013 by grateful2be
	Supervised visitation; ignoring boundaries (Preview) I am not sure what to do. My exah has supervised visitation which is also what our 12 yo daughter wants/is comfortable with. BUT he continues to break boundaries and I am not sure how far to push back. Last night he gt a new cell number & contacted her drunk & told her to keep it a secret from me. She s...	abbyalana	5	441	Jun 14, 2013 by Pushka
	Scared... (Preview) This is my first post. I am scared. My Therapist said 'Go to an Al-Anon meeting. It will help." I'm afraid to go. I'm afraid AH and I will fight. He's a weekend binge drinker. He's done this his whole life. He was raised around it. When you're not working you drink. He doesn't do it during t...	IrishMama6	7	337	Jun 14, 2013 by grateful2be
	Tryin to Find Balance.... (Preview) In an Unbalanced World... How is it that in this Disease it seems the only time i Feel my Feet Safely planted on the ground is when i am surrounded by Chaos? I don't get it... When things pop Up and I Have No Time to 'Over Think it' It seems it rolls smoother, but when i take the time to Respond instead of React,...	Jozie	3	444	Jun 14, 2013 by Bettina
	I don't know what to do.... (Preview) My husband has been sober for a few years he had been going to meetings faithfully. I just found out that he has been lying about going to meetings. He has been going to "meetings" and working steps with newcomers. I confronted my husband about it and asked him where he had been. At first he sai...	newgirl17	10	814	Jun 13, 2013 by Bettina
	Help for atheists (Preview) I feel like the 12 step and AA which is touted as the only way to stop drugs and drinking when you are bad off is too heavily centered around the Christian Faith. for someone like me who doesn't believe in any religion whatsoever there is no difference between us and animals and no paranormal outsider is g...	4st7lb	14	627	Jun 13, 2013 by likemyheart
	Do A's understand English? (Preview) I've tried to explain some issues to my A as clearly and detailed as possible, and without hostility. She doesn't get it, doesn't want to get it, got it and blocked it right out, or speaks some other language than myself. I honestly think I can communicate better with my 2 yr old granddaughter! A's ar...	Lyne	12	509	Jun 13, 2013 by flinn66
	What to do? (Preview) I will be married to my AH for 27 years next month. We have been together since the age of 13 and were married and had two boys by the age of 21. He became an alcoholic going on 6 years now, when his brother died of a sudden heart attack, who also was an alcoholic. We did the counseling three years ago, he gave t...	ms1414	3	408	Jun 13, 2013 by Jerry F
	Fantasy Lives (Preview) Hi everyone! I'm still pretty new here, read a lot and post little - which is unlike my RL; I talk a LOT. :) I thought I'd share a little about some progress I have made. As a child, one of my survival mechanisms was escapism. I had an active imagination, and loved to spend hours playing alone, making up frie...	samc	6	500	Jun 13, 2013 by Breakingfree
	I cheated on my alcoholic boyfriend.. (Preview) Honestly, I don't even know where to being. Unfortunately this will be longwinded. Alcohol is baffling, cunning, powerful and so is my love for my alcoholic boyfriend, but is love sometimes not enough? I have been dating my alcoholic boyfriend for 3 years this July. Over these few years I have been th...	kadyyo	4	1467	Jun 13, 2013 by Breakingfree
	I don't want to go home (Preview) I don't want to go home. My son lost another job last week. He is 35 years old and his alcoholism is getting worse. He knows this, and yesterday he told a neighbor he would go to an AA meeting this Thursday. But, since he lost this job last week, each day he's gets meaner. I've been divorced since 1989 and alw...	Linda77	10	513	Jun 13, 2013 by oldergal
	Husband sober for several years, got drunk today (Preview) My husband is an alcoholic. He has been arrested for DUI, and many many more times, drank and drove but wasn't caught. Throughout our lives together, he was usually drunk when I needed him (so he was unavailable). He never got help, or went to AA, but one day our adult son went to his workplace and foun...	lgnutah	8	574	Jun 13, 2013 by hotrod
	So conflicted (Preview) I am new to this message board. Reading some of the posts here is the first time I haven't felt like I am alone in so long. Not that I wish this chaos on any of you, but it sure does help to know that there are people who get it. I have been dealing with my A for 13 years to varying degrees. We have a child togeth...	kris1109	6	442	Jun 13, 2013 by Jen61
	Attitude (Preview) for years I was told (anytime I expressed my own opinion, which at times was what others didn't want to hear, I was told I had an attitude. This grew so big through the years that I felt attitude was based on feelings. all I knew is I thought there was something truly wrong with me, such as, I was difficul...	MeTwo2	5	461	Jun 12, 2013 by MeTwo2
	Confronting when a boundary is crossed (Preview) This is an unspoken boundary, mainly because it's against the law for AH to do what he did anyway. I went away for the weekend and AH found my spare key and drove my car this past weekend. I always write down the mileage when I go away, it's been a habit of mine for a year now and yes, there have been other tim...	ilovedogs	11	738	Jun 12, 2013 by cwya
	nowhere to turn (Preview) I have not posted here in a long time. I have no clue what to do. My life has not changed - it has gotten worse. My husband is still the drinking, sneaky, lying, SOB he was before. He is an addict, he needs help, he cannot do this on his own. Until he finds that illusive help, he will continue to destroy hi...	DebLisa55	9	442	Jun 12, 2013 by grateful2be
	Thought for the Day!! (Preview) "Never be defeated by the visible" -- Edited by Bettina on Tuesday 11th of June 2013 07:20:57 PM	Bettina	3	258	Jun 12, 2013 by PP
	"Nightmare Update" (Preview) I was so down when I posted this morning. Little sleep, a headache from crying, swollen eyes and a dread of the day to come. In the past my AH's detoxes and been extremely hard. Day 1 is seizures and 2 & 3 get progressively worse with hallucenations and violent outbursts causing restraints to have to...	wornoutmrsfixit	6	386	Jun 12, 2013 by wornoutmrsfixit
	I seem to be getting worse (Preview) As I work my program and find out more about myself I see a really bad side of me. I hurt this morning and having a hard time forgiving myself. Sometimes it seems I will never get to a point to be able to make amends to anyone in my life. Just got to say it's hard to think about all my wrongs and problems and try...	Cathyinaz	13	578	Jun 12, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	Emotions...X A close to death....again (Preview) I found out yesterday that my X A is in ICU and in critical condition. He had been missing in action for a few weeks. He has nobody, just a few celeb friends in AA he hangs with, but nobody substantial. He has been living in his car for almost 2 years and somebody found him unresponsive and took him to the E.R....	Bettina	10	435	Jun 11, 2013 by Bettina
	New and confused (Preview) I'm new here but not new to living with an AH mixed with pot. I'm broken this week as AH added his old drug of choice (Coke) back in the mix, stayed out all night and blew alot of money. Drugs, booze and strippers. We have been together for 11 years and this is the first time he has used COKE since we have been to...	axtella	5	622	Jun 12, 2013 by axtella
	3 Days and Hallelujah, He's Cured! (Preview) The AH was released from the hospital today on his 3rd day of detox because he refused treatment. The old danger to himself and others got me nowhere. I talked to the psych ward and got nowhere. I refused to pick him up and so did our sons. He said he had no clothes to wear home and I again refused to bring any s...	wornoutmrsfixit	8	459	Jun 11, 2013 by Bettina
	Obsessing about Obsessing (Preview) OK.....there's the deal I was told last week I was obsessing about my weight and dieting and I have to get over it. I didn't think I was but OK. Now I'm upset and obsessing about the person that told me I was obsessing and can't seem to stop. I understood what she said about making a lifestyle change or...	Cathyinaz	6	2535	Jun 11, 2013 by MeTwo2
	this may not be easy(corrective surgery) (Preview) I am going to take a go on this but it might not be easy. One eye is out of the way making room for the other. I am using reading glasses for the first time on this computer. I can barely see on my tablet so I am going to keep trying to give it a go on here. I miss all of you as I have been recovering from my surgery for 6...	Hoot Nanny	4	408	Jun 11, 2013 by cwya
	I found a room to rent (Preview) Last week I posted here about wanting things to change. I took some action and found a room to rent. I have been mulling this over. I have told my A b/f as he asked me this evening if I was planning to leave, and if so, could I just tell him. So I did. He hadn't drunk since last weekends big rant. And of cour...	Ms S	4	239	Jun 11, 2013 by grateful2be
	problems with family (Preview) I have been a member for more than 20 yeas. I have a 37 year old high functioning disabled son who also has a dealing conviction. He has not been able to find a job once he was laid off two years ago. He moved back home 9 months ago. We live in the country with no public transportation. He is becoming desp...	Sheila F	3	345	Jun 11, 2013 by grateful2be
	I'm angry. (Preview) I am not sure angry is the proper term but I can't think of the word I am looking for. I have lurked on this message board for a while but this is my first time posting. My sister is an alcoholic. She hit her rock bottom Jan 2012. Her daughter (five at the time, seven now) was taken away from her and I permanent l...	someonestolemyalias	5	248	Jun 11, 2013 by grateful2be
	work travel, feeling anxious (Preview) Next week I will be away for 2 nights for work. The last time I traveled, AH went crazy, drinking, drugging, etc. That was 6 mos ago, 2 detoxes, and almost 60 AA meetings for him since. I have to remember that I cant control cure or cause it. He will do what he is going to do. I am justfeeling anxious about it to...	ParisMemories	6	274	Jun 11, 2013 by ParisMemories
	I'm still weak!!! (Preview) I tried reaching out to my son that is in recovery but I chosed to speak with his pastor instead of my son. I feel that even hearing his voice will hurt me and bring up emotions that I can't handle right now. Is it bad for me to be angry hurt fustrated towards him still for all that he has done to me and my family e...	Gaby	7	413	Jun 11, 2013 by Mirandac
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.