The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I went to work today. I went through the front door of the large historic building that I work in and parked my car on the side of the building close to the front steps. I do that because we have a circular drive in an inner-city neighborhood and it helps to cut down on folks using my drive to sell drugs. Sometimes, I walk around the building to check the parameters and the three back doors to make sure no one has tried to get in or left stuff I don't want on our lot. Today, I decided just to enter the front of the building. I worked for awhile, took care of some things, then decided to go home. Armed and locked the building. Got in my car. Started to drive around the house to the other side of the lot. Well, what to my wondering eyes should appear but a man dressed in shorts and a shirt, butting his cigar out on our back porch, as he relaxed on his sleeping bag, drinking a beer and surrounded by several other large empty cans. I stopped. "You know this is private property?" "Yes. I was hit by a car. See my meds?" I asked him to move on three times which he kept telling me he was going to do and of course I knew he wasn't going to do it and just kept watching him from my car. One part of me felt deep compassion for him. Another part of me felt glad that today some of the people who frequent my workplace and park in the back couldn't come. Another part of me felt angry that he saw our back porch as a place to set up camp, butt out his cigars, cast his beer cans, move our porch mats and drape his clothes over the porch railing. The practiced side of me knew after three requests to move that he had no intention on moving, was waiting for me to drive on because he said he was going, and couldn't believe I was still there watching him. I said, "Well, you're trespassing. I asked you to move on three times. Now, I'm calling the police. Something I hate to do but have to do. He picked up a bag containing more beers, left everything else and walked off the lot. I knew he'd be back, so I called the police. It took them about an hour to come. The man returned - didn't see the police - and walked back to the porch - then saw my car still parked and walked out the other side of the drive. The policeman saw him and went to get him. The man said he'd come to our place because we gave him drugs and showed the officer the same bottle of drugs he'd showed me when he told me he'd been hit by a car. The officer said it contained some kind of generic antibiotics and if he'd been hit by a car he wouldn't have been walking as he was and he'd need more than antibiotics. He then asked the man to remove his things. The guy said "hell, no. I'm done with that." Translation - somebody will throw them in her trash and I'll come back - haul it all out and sleep on her porch after I finish these new beers. The officer told the man he was never to be on our property again - knowing if one man can sleep there, there will be a large number with drugs, alcohol and fights soon to follow - and wrote a trespassing order out after running a check on my "guest." He then picked everything up from my porch, threw it all into a garbage bag and took it with him in the squad car so that the man couldn't find any of it in the trash and set up his home again on our porch. The officer then told me that it was good I had not parked in the back, gotten out of my car, or allowed the man to stay on the premises. He's a very dangerous fellow. We have a long history on him and you were in danger. Then, he promised to alert other officers to check our premises to make sure no one was there who shouldn't be there.
What the amazing thing to me was in this whole scenario was how lovingly my HP had guided me away from danger that I didn't even know existed today. I've worked among folks for almost 30 years who are in various stages of drug abuse or alcoholism. I'm generally not afraid of any of them and feel at home where I work. But, today, even without fear and years of experience with folks like the man on my back porch, I needed the help of my HP in the form of guidance away from checking the back of our house on foot, deliberately waiting in my car until the man left on foot and calling police, and an officer who looked out for me in ways I never even asked him to do.
Gotta love my HP! S/he does do what I don't even know sometimes I can't do for myself. I'm praying for the man on my porch and all those who can't or won't get help for themselves today. I know that their HP is providing for them as well in ways I might not always see but trust is there for them whether they know it or not.
Oh boy- am I so grateful to be living where I do. We lock the house over the Christmas New Year period. Lots of time i don't bother to lock the car. My SO comes from a bigger town and she is far more cautious.
My big deal today is this- I am applying for a better job. I have a horse-race chance- but worth trying. Our printer has stopped working... so like you I had to go through all the moves- ringing a technician- taking it bak to the store etc etc.
Calm cool detachment um... work through the problem. The store is an hour away- and there was no guarantee they were at fault.
Well it would have been a wasted journey... I used the phone- got onto the right help-line and got to trouble-shoot the problem.
Now I am sitting here, with a cup of cocoa...
Off up to town to get a new cartridge, instead of a refill... that may work...
It does work if we work at it. Know when to back off and detach- and then when to act.
Thank you all. Why is it I can act so cool and calm and centered with people who aren't my loved ones and not so much at times with those I have known much longer and much differently. Perhaps it all boils down to expectations?
