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Announcing ---
(Preview)
Family -- This weekend was filled with emotion, stress, anxiety - then gratitude and humbleness. as drama has not escaped me, totally, my partner and I dealt with a complication, induction, then emergency caesarian. she was amazing, showing me the strength and courage of a mother that are rarely m...
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CJ
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17
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1094
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Desperately need some advice
(Preview)
Hi everyone. I'm new here, and I found this forum out of desparation! I'll try to make this horribly long story as brief as I can. I have a 52 year old severly alcoholic brother living with my 78 year old mom. I'm staying there now also because of the situation. He is on full diability, in need of many organ...
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kennymack
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6
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699
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Am I crazy or what??
(Preview)
I'm pretty new to AlAnon and loving the glimpses of serenity that I see. So, for me, starting to work the program has meant creating some distance between myself and my husband. (He's not the A, my stepson is, but my H is an ACOA). Doing more of my own thing--feels good, but also lonely. So I've started try...
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Jen57
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6
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388
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Had my disability hearing today.
(Preview)
I met with my attorney an hour beforehand to go over things. He warned me that as luck would have it, we drew one of the toughest judges out of that area office. Sigh. It lasted 90 grueling minutes, and the chair was so uncomfortable that I had to keep shifting from one hip to the other with my bad back. Halfw...
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Tenderheartsks
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3
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484
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Awesome Camp-out for AA/Alanon
(Preview)
I attended an awesome AA/Alanon camp-out this weekend on the Hopi Reservation in Arizona. Freedom in Sobriety. The speakers were inspiring - AA, Alanon, and Alateen. The Alateen speakers in particular were so powerful. I went to sleep under a full moon listening to a drum group. I am committed to ke...
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nmike
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3
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560
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good and bad
(Preview)
Today I had the unfortunate position of being stuck with someone else's mistake at work. I had an idea I might be. I have been there and done that many times. On the other hand since I have been working really super hard to get through many of the obstacles in front of me a request I asked for to do with the w...
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maresie
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3
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389
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hello all
(Preview)
thanks for some of the feedback i got on my last post..maybe i am not ready yet..maybe i haven't gone through enough pain..maybe things will change..not cut off but change maybe i will move away..or maybe at some point i will find the courage to stop picking up the phone or maybe i still haven't learnt th...
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charlescharles
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0
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285
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4th step inventory
(Preview)
For me, this has been tough. I've been told to get it all done and don't let it just drag out for months so that's what I'm trying to do. It's really discouraging though because when you start looking at the past and seeing all the things you are carrying with you on a daily basis, it's really sad. Resentmen...
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Nicole
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5
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5007
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part two
(Preview)
Off we go again with Tim driving. He started talking himself awake, I begged him to pull overhe refused. I said I have to go to the br. he says whatever in a very mean way that basically was so what, He finally stops, I limp into the dark rest room scared and got sick. Not wanting to get back into the van. T...
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debilyn
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2
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456
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Crazy mother in law!
(Preview)
Hi! I am a newbie because I can no longer deal with what is going on in my life with out some support. I have taken xanax to deal with it in the past and quit taking that and now experiencing anxiety attacks due to not wanting to deal with confrontation. My mother-in-law is an alcoholic. The only things t...
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malauba777
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12
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1664
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kids
(Preview)
I have been reading in the search mode and I just had to share one of the best explanations I have ever read about talking to our kids. The things I learn in al anon can be used in all our affairs and this has been expanded for me re: honesty with our kids. Love this and send thanks to John for this posted r...
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ddub
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6
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477
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An Aha!
(Preview)
I just had an epiphany! I grew up as a child with an alcoholic father. During those years, it was drilled into my siblings and me that what went on in the house was a secret. The funny thing was that as I grew up and started sharing some of the "secrets" with close friends and neighbors, they all s...
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thetalady
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3
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384
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all I give is mixed messages
(Preview)
AH drinks daily, just lost his driver's liscence due to DUI. We have two kids. I want a separation, he is supposedly looking for a place, we sleep in seperate rooms. OK, so, last night, a great band comes to town, and I wanna go, but I work till late. Halfway through, they are slow and permit me to leave earl...
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RainyJamie
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2
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450
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Very long ride with an A pt 1
(Preview)
Arnold and Nic's great adventure. excuse the mistakes I am pooped. crosspost pl This all started from, I believe, Alexis sent out pictures of Arnold and nic over the internet. They were stuck in a shelter in LA,Ca. Janice of "Heartsonnoses" pig sanctary sent me an email. "Deb, these...
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debilyn
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1
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404
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stages of recovery
(Preview)
During all the stages of recovery I've learned a lot. There is however a special grace in being in al anon. When I was first in recovery from codependency I felt I had to convert everyone. I was always recommending books (I still do that). I used to give people my books and then go out and get another copy...
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maresie
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1
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390
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my a is coming back
(Preview)
i'm getting really sick of talking about the same stuff over and over again..but it looks like my a is coming back into town...and even though i say i will keep an open mind to it..i am nervous and pretty doubtful anything will really change i am prepared this time to take some steps..boundaries...and e...
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charlescharles
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6
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457
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survival or deception?
(Preview)
Hello all, I havent been here for a bit, I have been so busy working on my plan....only the more I work on it, the guiltier I feel. Abf has been basically kissing my behind since the ugly head of aggression and alcohol reared it itself bruising me and breaking a small bone in my foot. He has been sober fo...
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liljeannie
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5
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432
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being harassed by the ex A
(Preview)
Suddenly out of the blue the ex A is back calling me several times a day. On the weekend he called 15 times and just blocked up my entire voice mail. So on Sunday I switched my phone off (to airplane mode). Then I got into trouble because no one could reach me who needed to reach me. I have made a huge point of no...
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maresie
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17
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685
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Setting firm boundaries
(Preview)
Dear all, It seems to be boundary test for me at the moment, my work situation has turned insecure, I knew this was likely, and I will be lucky to sitting at a desk next week, I will have work until december though but have no workspace, I'll get over it. A friend who I thought was really for me has let me down,...
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maire rua
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2
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310
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Took the bit between my teeth...
(Preview)
Hi Family, Well, Lynn, it was you who prompted me to take the bit between my teeth and be brave. I sent out an email to my church support group telling them just how I am feeling right now particularly and how I am not managing weekends at all and feel isolated blah blah... you know the rest if you read my prev...
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Suzannah
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4
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541
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the death of a young addict
(Preview)
A friend of mines child, a young man of 23, died today of a heroin overdose. From what I am to understand heroin is on the rise with the young now a days. What a waste, if only he could see the pain this has inflicted on his family and friends. I know his family felt they've done all they could do, got him treat...
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Alone
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8
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584
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halt
(Preview)
ok I would say it is my hormones but I don't have any...haha You guys know I am recouping from knee surgery. It looks great I am walking unaided a bit. Still pretty easily tired. anyway yesterday I was working on a rescue. Breaking two potted pigs out of hades in a horrible shelter in LA Ca. Lots of plannin...
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debilyn
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4
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359
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confused even more
(Preview)
Not sure which way to turn right now. Recent events with my partner who is in rehab have left me questioning alot about myself. I know I couldnt have got through the past few weeks without you guys. The trouble is I know I'm codependant, I know I have massive problems since childhood due to my A dad. I kn...
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Mariner
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5
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426
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Having to know - getting to the why...
(Preview)
I was reading another post and some responses and I thought this was a good topic because I got stuck on it many times on this road. I wanted to share what I do sometimes and see if anyone else does it and/or maybe it will help someone get through. I used to have to have in my face proof of something because g...
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carolinagirl
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9
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506
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Really working toward recovery
(Preview)
We just got back from a 10 day holiday with another couple. Don't get me wrong - we had a great holiday, and they are lovely Christian people. I really tried to not focus on them always "bragging" obout their 2 children and grandchildren. She says they have never gone thru anything in their l...
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meagain
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4
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304
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Just Checking In - Been Doing Good Staying Away From A-ExBf
(Preview)
Hi everyone, I just thought i'd check in and say hi... I've been doing good and staying away from A-exbf. It's still pretty fresh, so of course i've had THOUGHTS of it, but then quickly thought better than to go ahead and do it. I always just say to myself "what good is it going to do? Is is going to c...
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cherrygirl30
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1
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303
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seeking approval
(Preview)
All of my life, even after I moved out of my parents house, I worried if my mom would approve of the decisions I made. If I thought she would not agree, I would not do certain things. I even was afraid to tell her that we got a new kitten because I knew she would complain about it, and when I told her, she did. She...
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buick23
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3
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597
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Weeekends
(Preview)
Come to realise that I have a real HUGE problem with weekends. If I can get out and if I can make it to church, I manage - well sort of. I meet people, I mix and have a cup of tea or coffee and a chat. and then walk home to an empty home and just do not feel encouraged to cook a Sunday dinner like I used to do when I had...
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Suzannah
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4
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434
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Long time.....
(Preview)
Wow, it has been a long time since I've been on here. I've been very busy with my daughter starting school, service work through Al-Anon and Alateen, and of course the everyday routine. But I have to admit that i am thrilled to be back and have time to stop by and read posts, it makes me grateful for the prog...
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CJC
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1
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394
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feeling content
(Preview)
Every other weekend I'm the only one here in this house, and this weekend is one of those. I have always threated those lonely weekends, but this one turned out okay so far. I've been by myself exept for when I went to a f2f on Friday and I went to town with a friend tonight. I took time for myself and started w...
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buick23
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2
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291
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Havent posted in a while
(Preview)
I havent posted in a while concerning the situation with my ex A B/F but this morning I felt I needed to. I guess just to vent and reach out for some suggestions on how to deal with whats about to happen. Although I havent spoken with my ex or anyone in his circle of family and friends in a while (been super bus...
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HEARTBROKEN IN NJ
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1
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424
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it's become too unmanageble
(Preview)
my life has become completely unmanageable, and no amount of prayer and dedication to my HP is doing anything. i turn my entire life over to my HP, i surrender my willpower to my HP. things just keep getting worse! i'm going one hour at a time at this point, forget the "one day" thing. perhaps s...
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sadako
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6
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488
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woo -- acceptance / inventory taking of what ever -- itz ok 2 lg lg always
(Preview)
Hi hi and namaste~, shalom 2 all -- I know we r a www site and I do not actively discriminate on any kid.. Only a kid that is displaying a behaviour pattern that I have learned to let go / let my h p heal me out of makes me have s queasy sense in me. I have been told that is the voice of h.p. I accept that is the voice of...
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getoverit
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0
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335
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Beyond the promise of Al-Anon
(Preview)
To me, the promise is that I will be OK regardless of another person's behavior. The benefits are even more. Tonight I see AlAnon and the miracle of detaching with love has allowed me to push aside the ism and let me live with my love for my brother. He died tonight. I didn't always think of it as detaching w...
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Jill
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14
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722
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strange dream
(Preview)
In my dream last night I was hanging out with some friends (people from back in school in my teenager years), we went to this bar and each of us ordered a few mini bottle drinks, then we got into my truck (I don't even own a truck) and drove off. I was drinking and driving. Then I decided to pull over and let my f...
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buick23
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6
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580
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Back online
(Preview)
I finally made it back online after over a week without electricity following Hurricane Gustav. Fortunately no damage to my house - just tons of limbs and debris. But the heat was beginning to get to me!!! My SAB moved back a couple of weeks ago and things have been going very well. He even tolerated...
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round3
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2
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316
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New?.. I guess.
(Preview)
I suppose I'm not entirely 'new' to this whole al-anon stuff. My boyfriend has been an alcoholic well before we met, I know this for a fact. Alcoholism is a thing that runs in his family, or so he has told me.. I recently had to have an abortion because we are not ready for such a huge responsibility just yet...
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Beckatitis
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4
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391
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I think I am growing up, after 40 years of life...
(Preview)
Well the AH has been home now for about 2 weeks. Things have gone pretty good. I am grateful to have him home in that since we lost our "baby" (our dog) it has been really tough. She died on my birthday (8/26/08) and it has been difficult on our whole family. I wasn't sure how my AH was going to cope...
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wildthang86
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1
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408
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Seeing Things From The Other Side
(Preview)
My friend's husband is an ex drug addict. They are currently separated and he came for a visit. I was able to view the behaviors of both the Alanoner and the Alcoholic. It gave me a totally different perspective. She was incredibly mean to him and was right in his face reprimanding him for every mistake...
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kissers
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4
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589
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the holidays
(Preview)
The holidays are approaching in a month or two. I am in the USA and for those in the UK I'd remind you we have Thanksgiving here which is really a 4 day holiday. Christmas is not as long as it is in the UK and elsewhere but it is still a huge holiday. Last year I really did not do too bad. This year I want to do bet...
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maresie
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2
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353
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my a
(Preview)
i think she is coming back to the area and i am having an anxiety attack about it..she has been miserable and down in the dumps now she wants to come back home i am ready to pack up my stuff and move out of state if things get nasty again because ..hopefully...god i pray..i can not deal with this crap any longe...
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charlescharles
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1
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378
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Al-Anon humor is good medicine sometimes!!
(Preview)
( TRUE STORY) A member of my group called to talk to me late this afternoon. She is 100% detached from her daughter after 15 years of strugles and 7 rehabs. She made that decision almost a year ago. She has never looked back, as hard as it has been she has stuck to her guns. Her three grandchildren live with h...
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RLC
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5
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2159
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I will be dancing!!!
(Preview)
Hi all! Well, thanks to my wonderful f2f meeting and the great people here, I feel real good about the choices I am making and feel like I am doing really well so far. The hunting season starts this saturday and I am nervous for sober bf, but it is his path to follow - he has to decide what he can handle wit...
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mslouise
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8
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486
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Grateful
(Preview)
Everyday I miss my ex-a so I keep coming here to remind me how lucky I am that I am not with him any longer. I read all of your post and I see how many of you that are still strugeling with resentment. I am grateful today that i was strong enough to leave. My head says run run, but my heart keeps on telling me how...
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notmywill
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7
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532
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streaking
(Preview)
Oh the dizzy mood swings sure keep me going and I constantly appreciate the support, encouragement and hope I receive here. It is such a novel idea that al anon folks accept each other as we are right now even when we don't know ourself who we are and under constant change as we progress or slip or sink or...
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ddub
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3
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495
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Wonderful Day
(Preview)
I've been hard of hearing for years, until in the last couple years it has isolted me to an unacceptable degree. Last year, I decided to start the process to get myself a bone anchored hearing aid, as I can't wear a regular one. This means that a screw is inserted into the skull, and the hearing aid plug...
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lin0606
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7
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415
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Things I can do insead of worrying about a relationship with someoen else
(Preview)
Things I can do besides think of the A...... Work Steps and Read Clean Exercise Learn about current events Do something to advance my work or career Meditate Write a letter to myself telling me what I have done right in life!! Practice healthy conversation, pick a topic and share with someone healthy...
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glad
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3
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560
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I really miss my husband
(Preview)
Hi all. As you know, my husband and I have been separated for almost 4 months. Since then, I am involved in f2f Al-Anon meetings, got a sponsor and am on Step 2, working hard, taking care of my home, paying my bills (just barely, but able to do it), taking care of our 8 cats and a sweet dog, and learning to li...
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AJ
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10
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2128
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Fear...
(Preview)
I have been thinking all day about how I believe inside that once things go bad that they will never be good again. Why do I feel this way? For the simple reason that I believe that if I screw up that God or other people or both want to punish me forever. This is the attitude I grew up with from my mom. She was al...
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seekingserenity
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5
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495
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in the bedroom
(Preview)
Hello all. I recently joined this message group in hopes of being able to find some answers to a very personal matter. My boyfriend and I have been dating about 3.5 years now, he has been sober for 3 years and 5 months... When we first started dating he was still drinking but we were not serious... after a s...
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twobytwo
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5
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589
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How Do You Stop From "Checking On" Your A-Ex Online
(Preview)
Hi all, I guess I cant say yesterday was REALLY my day one, and if it was, I kind of feel like i've already blown it in a sense. You'll all remember that I put down how my A-exbf blocked me online and how much it was bothering me. Well, last night I saw that he UN-blocked me, as he popped up on my buddylist. I w...
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cherrygirl30
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9
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656
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Ike
(Preview)
((((Family)))), To all you in the path of Hurricane Ike, please be careful. Let us know that you are okay when you can. I'll be thinking of all our Texas folk who have to evacuate. Don't take any chances. Do what you have to in order to be safe. Love and blessings to you all. I'll be saying extra praye...
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Karilynn
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2
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360
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Joyoma
(Preview)
I just wanted to let you know you have been on my mind this week and I hope you are doing okay and remembering to take care of self. ((((((hugs))))))
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Tenderheartsks
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2
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357
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HAD TO SHARE THIS LOVE IT
(Preview)
THIS IS A QUOTE FROM ELEANOR ROOSEVELT . MANY PEOPLE WILL WALK IN AND OUT OF YOUR LIFE BUT ONLY TRUE FRIENDS WILL LEAVE FOOTPRINTS IN YOUR HEART TO HANDLE YOURSELF , USE YOUR HEAD TO HANDLE OTHERS , USE YOUR HEART ANGER IS ONLY ONE LETTER SHORT OF DANGER IF SOMEONE BETRAYS YOU ONCE, IT IS HIS FAULT IF HE BETR...
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abbyal
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8
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566
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New job, new part of the country, new al-anon home group!
(Preview)
I have good news, I moved recently and I just found a great new al-anon meeting in my new city. I found a Monday night group I like very much near to where I work. So, right after work, off I go! Just a reminder that this fellowship spans the globe and that adds to MY comfort and serenity- my brothers and siste...
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Jean4444
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4
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295
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Trying to change
(Preview)
Hi Guys Struggled today, woke up feeling anxious and upset, was in danger of losing it a bit. So to get out of the house I went into town shopping. Usually I would be buying lots of goodies to take to my partner on a visit to his rehab. Honestly you'd think it was his birthday with the amount of 'presents/go...
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Mariner
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5
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527
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work
(Preview)
i gotta go back to work...what i am learning from this program and from other programs has led me to a place of financial insecurity in a positive way i have been up and down financially most of my life..from times have having much money in the bank to other times of living out of my car and scrounging for ch...
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charlescharles
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4
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493
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In rememberance...
(Preview)
(((((Family)))), On this solemn day, let us take a moment to pause and reflect on those lives lost 7 years ago today. Many MIP family members will be hurting today. May we keep them all in our love and prayers. By the grace of HP hubby was down in the city that day and close to the Towers. He made it home s...
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Karilynn
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5
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490
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doing for me, long winded debilyn
(Preview)
Hi family, well I was my usual stubborn self and so the surgery went well. staff was great. I made one nurse get a bit mad and red faced...haha they have these horrid, plastic gowns now with a input to stick in this hose that blows warm or cold air. I felt like I was in a plastic bag!! I did not say anything. I ju...
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debilyn
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4
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554
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Drownig, depressed and in need of a plan B
(Preview)
I have had a rough week. My children are showing signs of anger and how this is affecting them. I have told my AH when I would ask him to stop drinking about my concerns when it came to our kids. Believe me it's part of my anxiety, my eldest has social, and language issues and has been getting help since 6...
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olg1213
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5
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614
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