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Once an A, always a ..... liar?
(Preview)
My A has been sober since mid-April and is almost halfway through a 6 month rehab program. He has been working a "get well" job but looking for something more permanent. Since he hasn't been working long, hasn't been getting 40 hours, and doesn't make much money, he hasn't been paying chi...
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lmw
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7
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1758
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Still moving!
(Preview)
Hey y'all! Just an update! I am doing better. I am still moving until Sept. 30th. It is a slow process, but I am getting things done. Thanks to God, I have my wits about me and that I haven't gotten too overwhelmed! I'll get back to you when the moving is closer to getting done or when it is completed and I am...
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Hoot Nanny
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2
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356
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Check Up
(Preview)
(((((Family))))), Just thought I would update you. I went and had my physical yesterday. Last time I was back there, I was with my Tim. Hard to go back to that office. The doctor's nurse use to take care of Tim when he was with another doctor. I gave him one of Tim's memorial cards. He didn't realize...
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Karilynn
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10
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504
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need to rant
(Preview)
oh my god..my a is crazy..she is so out of it sometimes it is amazing..she aient drinking or drugging and seems to be being productive since she got back from where she was but she is a mess she knows i am not in love with her...and even thinks there is no future with us...and she knows she really did go over b...
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charlescharles
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4
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410
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much ado about nothing[to big]
(Preview)
yesterday was a crazy day. we had the back hoe out here on our property to dig the electric lines. we did the safety calls first, they came out and told us where the lines were and where it was safe to dig. my husband being an excavator by trade operated the hoe. he hit a hidden line. out goes the power, up cam...
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jewely
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4
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451
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1 step closer...yay!
(Preview)
Hello family, In my last post, I was angry, frustrated and working towards a solution, or him seeing MY point of view. Well, he did, he is not happy about it, but whats done is done. I am now the owner of a 2001 Nissan Altima, totally paid for and totally in my name. Though he is unhappy about this, and has...
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liljeannie
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1
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349
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New Changes, New Choices....
(Preview)
Beginning a new job Training information coming in at break neck speed Driving on interstates long since driven Trying my hand back out in the work world Alarms, Timers, Supervisors, Buzzers From sedate to intense Appropriate appearance required Less then confident in new found techniques Peopl...
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Peggy7
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4
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567
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Ike Aftermath
(Preview)
Hello family! Everyone I have talked to so far is doing okay. Most of Houston is still without any power... driving is hazardous b/c there are no traffic lights. The city is having a curfew all week, so no driving between dusk to dawn. Somehow I was one of the first 100,000 to have power restored. Th...
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kitty
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9
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487
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Back to step #1....*sigh*....
(Preview)
Had a grand time in Hawaii. He went. No drinking. Just loads of fun in paradise. I had made up my mind to give "us" another chance. But, the last few days he has been having, "a drink." A drink, keep in mind, is a half-pint of gin. This evening I had a new friend in. SOmeone I lik...
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Diva
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23
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737
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I have electricity!
(Preview)
I have not had any electricity for a week! wow! I am so glad to have it back. I will be in touch more soon. I even get to do laundry finally! And I get to cook my own meals again! I have a huge gratitude list today. Hugs, J.
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Jean4444
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3
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374
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please help having a hard time...sorry to go on and on
(Preview)
Please bere with me as I am having a really hard time. My family says my exbf wants me to think down on myself. Wants me to feel all the blame. Wants me to doubt myself. I know I was getting stronger because I wouldn't take some of the downing comments he used to say to me like "you have no friends&qu...
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mslouise
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8
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563
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Would like some advice
(Preview)
I have been dealing with my husband for over 12 years now but the last couple of years have been extremely hard. Seems he is drinking way more ever since I got pregnant with our third child, then my mom was diagnosed with lung cancer and died 8 months later and about a month after she passed away my 10 daug...
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Aljani
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5
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617
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Still Going Strong!
(Preview)
Hi everyone, I posted in here a couple of times re: my A-ExBf and how we split... Well, turns out i've been doing pretty well in keeping away from him. Thankfully he hasnt contacted me either (or tried to). I have however been approached by other guys (one in particular) and we've actually been chatti...
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cherrygirl30
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4
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470
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How does an AA 4th step differ from Al-Anon 4th Step
(Preview)
I do have a sponsor who is a double winner. She has been working the steps with me and she did admit that she only knows one way to work the steps and that is the AA way. I have heard it said that the 4th step in AA is different from the one in Al-Anon. Can someone clarify this for me? Thanks
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Mobirdie
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6
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6284
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Why do I feel like something bad is headed my way?
(Preview)
Hi everyone, The last few weeks have been really tough. I finally understand that I matter, and my son matters, enough to create a boundary for my AH. My boundary was that I didnt want to live with AH if he continued to drink and be drunk in our home. My AH "moved out" and has been gone now for 3 day...
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Rocky38
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5
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581
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how do u live a good life
(Preview)
just abit restless tonight..thinking about what i can do to make my life the best i can...trying to find some self love here..where i put my wants and needs before the others..and do what i need to do to get the ball rolling in my own life not having to worry or take care of the other..making it so they can de...
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charlescharles
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5
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513
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the saga continues....
(Preview)
So as you all know my "sober"abf moved himself out on Monday. I told him please do not take any money out of the account as we had pending payments - 1 of which was for a medical bill for him (we didn't have much in there anyways). On Tuesday am he texted me saying he withdrew $50. Asked him ag...
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mslouise
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6
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422
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How do you do it?????
(Preview)
I am still sick from the horrendous behavior of the driver I had to Ca. Being stuck like that, with no choice was so horrible. I do not see how anyone could live like that day to day with out going crazy. My A was not that type of abusive. Plus I could leave or whatever, was never stuck. My prayers and love to yo...
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debilyn
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4
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404
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prayer request
(Preview)
Most of you know that my 2nd oldest son's wife has cystic fibrosis. She is once again in the hospital but not for the usual "tune up" they have found something on the lympnoids near her lungs and her lungs. They are not sure if it's an infection or cancer. Please say a short prayer. She told...
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marmare
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3
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418
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Very sad and confused - he left me
(Preview)
I am very sad, very angry. My soberbf left me on Monday. From my previous post, you can see we have been struggling lately since he got laid off his job 4 weeks ago. Before he got laid off we were talking about marriage (we even got joint checking account which I would have never done if I didn't feel righ...
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mslouise
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13
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713
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All around the mulberry bush......
(Preview)
GRRRRR!! I am so angry and so frustrated right now. I am trying to get myself a car. In my earlier posts I mentioned that I have a brand new jeep, abf pays for this vehicle...its a lease, so the registration is in the name of the bank. I drive it...after July 4th, he has never driven it again. I have told...
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liljeannie
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5
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540
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F2F
(Preview)
Just sitting here trying to pluck up courage to go to my first F2F meeting. Talking myself out of it, not sure it's the place for me, not sure I'll fit in, not sure I'll be of any use........ If I thought for one minute you guys would be there I'd be ok..... I'd get there early... Got 30 mins to decide
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Mariner
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12
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625
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living together and detaching
(Preview)
We have this sort of situation, I don't think it's that uncommon, we can't live seperately for financial reasons. Or it at least complicates things. I'm trying so hard to live my life like he is not a part of it. It's not that hard, I try to avoid any situation where I need him (child care, help around the ho...
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RainyJamie
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6
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538
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lung surgery #2
(Preview)
Just to say I had my #2 operation Monday to remove the lung met from right lobe. The schedule and routine was same as July. I am now home and gingerly breathing and trying to move normally. This one a bit more painful than #1 but I think it is because it was on my right and I am so right dominant. My son was my c...
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joyoma
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7
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440
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Update
(Preview)
My daughter inlaw is being released. Tests negative......seems the CF inflamed nodules horribly......Thanks you for the prayers!!!! Hugs
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marmare
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4
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296
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HP Has a Great Sense of Humor
(Preview)
I finally see it! Serenity! Isn't it funny how....we always think we know what we want, and ask and ask and beg HP for it, and cry and moan cos He's not giving us what we think we want? THEN, when we finally Let Go and Let God, the blessing flow so quickly like Manna, that we cannot even fathom how much and how g...
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Becky1
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5
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310
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Surviving Ike
(Preview)
Well Southwest Louisiana was affected by Ike also - we did NOT receive the really bad winds - ours was only 50-65 mph with a few gust up to around 80-85 mph. But we have had tremendous amounts of water from the storm surge. All of Cameron Parish & a good marjority of Calcasieu Parish is flooded - as you w...
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Rita G
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4
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768
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Announcing ---
(Preview)
Family -- This weekend was filled with emotion, stress, anxiety - then gratitude and humbleness. as drama has not escaped me, totally, my partner and I dealt with a complication, induction, then emergency caesarian. she was amazing, showing me the strength and courage of a mother that are rarely m...
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CJ
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17
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1099
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Desperately need some advice
(Preview)
Hi everyone. I'm new here, and I found this forum out of desparation! I'll try to make this horribly long story as brief as I can. I have a 52 year old severly alcoholic brother living with my 78 year old mom. I'm staying there now also because of the situation. He is on full diability, in need of many organ...
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kennymack
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6
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706
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Am I crazy or what??
(Preview)
I'm pretty new to AlAnon and loving the glimpses of serenity that I see. So, for me, starting to work the program has meant creating some distance between myself and my husband. (He's not the A, my stepson is, but my H is an ACOA). Doing more of my own thing--feels good, but also lonely. So I've started try...
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Jen57
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6
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394
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Had my disability hearing today.
(Preview)
I met with my attorney an hour beforehand to go over things. He warned me that as luck would have it, we drew one of the toughest judges out of that area office. Sigh. It lasted 90 grueling minutes, and the chair was so uncomfortable that I had to keep shifting from one hip to the other with my bad back. Halfw...
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Tenderheartsks
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3
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490
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Awesome Camp-out for AA/Alanon
(Preview)
I attended an awesome AA/Alanon camp-out this weekend on the Hopi Reservation in Arizona. Freedom in Sobriety. The speakers were inspiring - AA, Alanon, and Alateen. The Alateen speakers in particular were so powerful. I went to sleep under a full moon listening to a drum group. I am committed to ke...
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nmike
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3
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567
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good and bad
(Preview)
Today I had the unfortunate position of being stuck with someone else's mistake at work. I had an idea I might be. I have been there and done that many times. On the other hand since I have been working really super hard to get through many of the obstacles in front of me a request I asked for to do with the w...
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maresie
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3
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395
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hello all
(Preview)
thanks for some of the feedback i got on my last post..maybe i am not ready yet..maybe i haven't gone through enough pain..maybe things will change..not cut off but change maybe i will move away..or maybe at some point i will find the courage to stop picking up the phone or maybe i still haven't learnt th...
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charlescharles
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0
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291
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4th step inventory
(Preview)
For me, this has been tough. I've been told to get it all done and don't let it just drag out for months so that's what I'm trying to do. It's really discouraging though because when you start looking at the past and seeing all the things you are carrying with you on a daily basis, it's really sad. Resentmen...
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Nicole
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5
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5094
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part two
(Preview)
Off we go again with Tim driving. He started talking himself awake, I begged him to pull overhe refused. I said I have to go to the br. he says whatever in a very mean way that basically was so what, He finally stops, I limp into the dark rest room scared and got sick. Not wanting to get back into the van. T...
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debilyn
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2
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466
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Crazy mother in law!
(Preview)
Hi! I am a newbie because I can no longer deal with what is going on in my life with out some support. I have taken xanax to deal with it in the past and quit taking that and now experiencing anxiety attacks due to not wanting to deal with confrontation. My mother-in-law is an alcoholic. The only things t...
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malauba777
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12
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1672
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kids
(Preview)
I have been reading in the search mode and I just had to share one of the best explanations I have ever read about talking to our kids. The things I learn in al anon can be used in all our affairs and this has been expanded for me re: honesty with our kids. Love this and send thanks to John for this posted r...
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ddub
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6
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482
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An Aha!
(Preview)
I just had an epiphany! I grew up as a child with an alcoholic father. During those years, it was drilled into my siblings and me that what went on in the house was a secret. The funny thing was that as I grew up and started sharing some of the "secrets" with close friends and neighbors, they all s...
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thetalady
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3
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389
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all I give is mixed messages
(Preview)
AH drinks daily, just lost his driver's liscence due to DUI. We have two kids. I want a separation, he is supposedly looking for a place, we sleep in seperate rooms. OK, so, last night, a great band comes to town, and I wanna go, but I work till late. Halfway through, they are slow and permit me to leave earl...
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RainyJamie
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2
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456
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Very long ride with an A pt 1
(Preview)
Arnold and Nic's great adventure. excuse the mistakes I am pooped. crosspost pl This all started from, I believe, Alexis sent out pictures of Arnold and nic over the internet. They were stuck in a shelter in LA,Ca. Janice of "Heartsonnoses" pig sanctary sent me an email. "Deb, these...
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debilyn
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1
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414
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stages of recovery
(Preview)
During all the stages of recovery I've learned a lot. There is however a special grace in being in al anon. When I was first in recovery from codependency I felt I had to convert everyone. I was always recommending books (I still do that). I used to give people my books and then go out and get another copy...
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maresie
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1
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396
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my a is coming back
(Preview)
i'm getting really sick of talking about the same stuff over and over again..but it looks like my a is coming back into town...and even though i say i will keep an open mind to it..i am nervous and pretty doubtful anything will really change i am prepared this time to take some steps..boundaries...and e...
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charlescharles
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6
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463
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survival or deception?
(Preview)
Hello all, I havent been here for a bit, I have been so busy working on my plan....only the more I work on it, the guiltier I feel. Abf has been basically kissing my behind since the ugly head of aggression and alcohol reared it itself bruising me and breaking a small bone in my foot. He has been sober fo...
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liljeannie
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5
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438
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being harassed by the ex A
(Preview)
Suddenly out of the blue the ex A is back calling me several times a day. On the weekend he called 15 times and just blocked up my entire voice mail. So on Sunday I switched my phone off (to airplane mode). Then I got into trouble because no one could reach me who needed to reach me. I have made a huge point of no...
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maresie
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17
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691
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Setting firm boundaries
(Preview)
Dear all, It seems to be boundary test for me at the moment, my work situation has turned insecure, I knew this was likely, and I will be lucky to sitting at a desk next week, I will have work until december though but have no workspace, I'll get over it. A friend who I thought was really for me has let me down,...
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maire rua
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2
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316
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Took the bit between my teeth...
(Preview)
Hi Family, Well, Lynn, it was you who prompted me to take the bit between my teeth and be brave. I sent out an email to my church support group telling them just how I am feeling right now particularly and how I am not managing weekends at all and feel isolated blah blah... you know the rest if you read my prev...
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Suzannah
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4
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550
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the death of a young addict
(Preview)
A friend of mines child, a young man of 23, died today of a heroin overdose. From what I am to understand heroin is on the rise with the young now a days. What a waste, if only he could see the pain this has inflicted on his family and friends. I know his family felt they've done all they could do, got him treat...
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Alone
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8
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593
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halt
(Preview)
ok I would say it is my hormones but I don't have any...haha You guys know I am recouping from knee surgery. It looks great I am walking unaided a bit. Still pretty easily tired. anyway yesterday I was working on a rescue. Breaking two potted pigs out of hades in a horrible shelter in LA Ca. Lots of plannin...
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debilyn
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4
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365
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confused even more
(Preview)
Not sure which way to turn right now. Recent events with my partner who is in rehab have left me questioning alot about myself. I know I couldnt have got through the past few weeks without you guys. The trouble is I know I'm codependant, I know I have massive problems since childhood due to my A dad. I kn...
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Mariner
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5
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432
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Having to know - getting to the why...
(Preview)
I was reading another post and some responses and I thought this was a good topic because I got stuck on it many times on this road. I wanted to share what I do sometimes and see if anyone else does it and/or maybe it will help someone get through. I used to have to have in my face proof of something because g...
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carolinagirl
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9
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512
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Really working toward recovery
(Preview)
We just got back from a 10 day holiday with another couple. Don't get me wrong - we had a great holiday, and they are lovely Christian people. I really tried to not focus on them always "bragging" obout their 2 children and grandchildren. She says they have never gone thru anything in their l...
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meagain
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4
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310
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Just Checking In - Been Doing Good Staying Away From A-ExBf
(Preview)
Hi everyone, I just thought i'd check in and say hi... I've been doing good and staying away from A-exbf. It's still pretty fresh, so of course i've had THOUGHTS of it, but then quickly thought better than to go ahead and do it. I always just say to myself "what good is it going to do? Is is going to c...
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cherrygirl30
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1
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309
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seeking approval
(Preview)
All of my life, even after I moved out of my parents house, I worried if my mom would approve of the decisions I made. If I thought she would not agree, I would not do certain things. I even was afraid to tell her that we got a new kitten because I knew she would complain about it, and when I told her, she did. She...
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buick23
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3
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605
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Weeekends
(Preview)
Come to realise that I have a real HUGE problem with weekends. If I can get out and if I can make it to church, I manage - well sort of. I meet people, I mix and have a cup of tea or coffee and a chat. and then walk home to an empty home and just do not feel encouraged to cook a Sunday dinner like I used to do when I had...
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Suzannah
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4
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439
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Long time.....
(Preview)
Wow, it has been a long time since I've been on here. I've been very busy with my daughter starting school, service work through Al-Anon and Alateen, and of course the everyday routine. But I have to admit that i am thrilled to be back and have time to stop by and read posts, it makes me grateful for the prog...
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CJC
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1
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400
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feeling content
(Preview)
Every other weekend I'm the only one here in this house, and this weekend is one of those. I have always threated those lonely weekends, but this one turned out okay so far. I've been by myself exept for when I went to a f2f on Friday and I went to town with a friend tonight. I took time for myself and started w...
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buick23
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2
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297
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Havent posted in a while
(Preview)
I havent posted in a while concerning the situation with my ex A B/F but this morning I felt I needed to. I guess just to vent and reach out for some suggestions on how to deal with whats about to happen. Although I havent spoken with my ex or anyone in his circle of family and friends in a while (been super bus...
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HEARTBROKEN IN NJ
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1
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433
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it's become too unmanageble
(Preview)
my life has become completely unmanageable, and no amount of prayer and dedication to my HP is doing anything. i turn my entire life over to my HP, i surrender my willpower to my HP. things just keep getting worse! i'm going one hour at a time at this point, forget the "one day" thing. perhaps s...
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sadako
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6
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491
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woo -- acceptance / inventory taking of what ever -- itz ok 2 lg lg always
(Preview)
Hi hi and namaste~, shalom 2 all -- I know we r a www site and I do not actively discriminate on any kid.. Only a kid that is displaying a behaviour pattern that I have learned to let go / let my h p heal me out of makes me have s queasy sense in me. I have been told that is the voice of h.p. I accept that is the voice of...
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getoverit
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0
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341
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