Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

UGH! I had to miss my meeting tonight because my mom is in town and I had to take her to another city for an accordion meeting(she performs in an accordion orchestra). Anyway, I came home, pulled in the garage, and there is a full empty bottle of wine on the front seat and a half drunk cup of wine in the cuph...

Lindaoakford · Lindaoakford

Ihad a psychologist appointment yesterday afternoon. I am starting to warm to her a little bit. I would want to.. I have seen her about 10 times now. It is just so hard to bring down those barriers to people. I find it hard to show on the outside what I am feeling on the inside. I am so used to hiding my tr...

kris10 · kris10

Is it EVER good to retaliate??? I've never felt this way before but right now I think that retaliation would make me feel a whole lot better.... ESH please

agapi · agapi

I am fairly new to AlAnon and just got home from a meeting about the second step. I shared my experience about my higher power and how my concept of that had changed over the years. Now I am concerned that I can no longer be an AlAnon member because if I keep going to meetings I cannot share my truth. Our gr...

peacewithin · peacewithin

I'm back at step one. My life is out of control. I went into the steps here on the board hotrod a help posting on there. Here are some of the things i'm dealing with. Who in my life is making me feel crazy and causing stress ? The A if I let him. Who has been controling your emotions and other areas of my life ?...

SusanThomas · SusanThomas

I know exactly what is going on - intellectually but (and I know but is a big word) I am having a really hard time with my present living situation. I lost my job and am living with my daughter and watching my granddaughter in exchange for rent. My daughter has started using cocaine on a regular basis and I...

Debilyn · Debilyn

How does one get into their inbox? I can click I have a message but the message will not come up. thank you ok something is wrong again. Says I have two messages I do not. Now it won't let me delete or edit my messages. Says I don't have the right to do this or something? yikes! -- Edited by Debilyn on Thursday...

emmyboo2 · emmyboo2

Is it bad that I hope the AH gets convicted of this DUI? He may lose his job if he gets convicted but I dont care because I am hoping it will get him to his bottom and he will go to inpatient rehab. I even called the prosecuter as did his sister in order to testify against him. He has enabling parents who are help...

stephaniej · stephaniej

Admittedly, I am in a highly unique situation. One of my AH's friends has been staying with us for six weeks. He recently started a job where my AH works, and has been using this time to save some money, get to know the area, and look for a place (his wife and daughter will be moving up here too, once they fi...

GreenerGrass · GreenerGrass

So, aside from my father who is a desperately sick, barely functioning alcoholic, my alcoholic husband, I also have a recovering drug addict sister. I tend to forget about the impact she has had on my sickness. She introduced me to drugs when I was young and I won't even get into how bad that was, but it's...

daisy31 · daisy31

So since I have been learning about my HP and all I have had this lingering feeling that the Christian God I grew up with is sooo mad at me. I keep asking myself if I could be going to hell if I don't believe in all of the bible. I am obsessing about it. I was raised to believe that I would go to hell if I didn't b...

John · John

Our site is currently down so access to the chatroom via the site entrance is not possible at this time. I am working diligently to get it back up and running asap. John

robind78 · robind78

I have been in Al-Anon for several months. Recently, my daughter's ABF was put on a sabbatical because of his drinking. His supervisor told him that his job would be held for 30 days pending him going to in-patient rehab. Unfortunately this ABF does not have health insurance and I really don't thin...

emil · emil

I spoke to my husband about returning to Al- Anon and returning to therapy. It was hard for him to understand- why would I need to go to therapy and meetings since he is not drinking. I really was able to communicate my struggles the past few months, my insecurities, my lack of trust, my resentments, an...

ttpurtee · ttpurtee

My soon to be ex is supposedly going on 6 months of sobriety. My lawyer is the only one who talks to him and my lawyer said that he was apethetic. I was wondering if it is normal to be apethetic while recovering from alcoholism or if he just does not care about me or the marriage? I was wondering if that is t...

usedtobeanyer · usedtobeanyer

I heard that this weekend and it really struck me as to how true it is. In and of itself, it doesn't really mean anything. But I think it gives us an opportunity to step back, quit taking it personally, and remember that our alcoholics truly are sick. Definitely a new mantra for me...

TLD · TLD

Thank you to everyone for your support. I am still at my parents and have met with victim services. They have confirmed my thoughts of the abuse I have put up for way too long. It's amazing that on my drive there, I thought, hm, is this the right thing to do? Yes, yes it is and I will pursue this. I feel ca...

wp · wp

Does anyone know why I can't get into the chatroom tonight? wp

dragonflys · dragonflys

My AH has relapsed. Smoking pot daily. So many don't know why it bothers me so much, but it does. I am trying to remain calm but I feel like my life is falling apart in front of my very eyes. My son is getting D's and F's in school, he is in middle school. He doesn't care and I don't know what to do. My daughter is a...

Tracy73 · Tracy73

My husband has had an addiction to perscription pain pills for about 11 years now. For all these years I have taken care of almost everything, the house, our kids, his business and worked my own full time job. Last year he started to go to meetings and got clean. He has been for a year now. I hoped that t...

daisy31 · daisy31

Okay, I do this thing on facebook. I will want to post a status of a saying that I love like today I posted "I am not perfect and that is fine with me". I really like that saying and posted it......only to go back and delete it 2 minutes later. I start thinking that someone will think I am weird e...

Lindaoakford · Lindaoakford

I haven't posted for a while. I have tried a few times but my internet access seemed to drop out, or it disappeared into the internet world somewhere... My last session with my psychologist nearly a fortnight ago knocked me around a bit. I posted the letter here I think. I am feeling better now but I was v...

daisy31 · daisy31

Just wanted to wish everyone a happy Valentine's day. What are you all doing for V-day? My boys have a school party which I love being able to go to and get lots of cute pictures of them :) I bought my hubby a bag of his favorite licorice...how's that for romance ha! We don't do anything too special for V...

stephaniej · stephaniej

I have been totally absorbed in A- and codependency-related stuff over the last few days, and it's definitely affecting my ability to stay serene. One of the things I really miss about having a "normal" life is just sharing random things about life. Since we've moved to a new area, I don't...

sirchef · sirchef

Well for the second day in a row I can't access the room. So what techniques from our program will help me deal with this frustration? Is all this a test for us who are experiencing the same problem to really apply the program to this ? well for me I'm really not doing very well at it. lol but not funny. This ro...

stefani74 · stefani74

Well last night was our first Valentine's Day and it was our first night with all of our kids spending the night together with us. He's really working hard to be a better dad to his two and be a dad to mine as well. I am really proud of the effort he's making and he's very proud of his progress since becoming...

Iris lover of dogs · Iris lover of dogs

Last weekend, my AH moved out. I had made the decision in early December, based on him breaking an important boundary, but we had agreed that we would keep living in the same house for 2 months, to give him time to figure out what he is going to do. So, on SAT, I helped him move all of his big stuff to a storag...

stephaniej · stephaniej

At least, this is true of my HP as I understand my HP to be. My HP can't stop loving me, and can't stop forgiving me.

stephaniej · stephaniej

This is my mantra in this exact moment. A minor blowup on the phone, that I cut short by saying I love you, I'll talk to you later, good-bye. And now I'm fighting that co-dependent urge to call back, smooth things over, apologize for things I never did, just to make peace. But I know to do that would only...

kel246 · kel246

Hi. This is my first post. I really don't want to make an outreach call but I don't want to isolate. I actually do want to isolate, stick my head in the sand and feel like a victim but I'm taking contrary action and typing away. Really feel so grateful for Al-Anon and the support I find here. I have a lot goin...

Green Eyes · Green Eyes

I'm doing fine these days with emotional detachment with my AH, and being physically separated helps a lot, but the financial mess that my AH has created is not allowing me to stay on "my side of sidewalk." I can't just mind my own business and just work on myself when it comes to the IRS, our ho...

rehprof · rehprof

I've been doing a really good job of detaching from my soon to be ex AH. Then my 15 year old tells me today that "Dad told me he needed money for his car insurance so I lent him $100..he says he will pay me back $150 next week" My A HAS a truck. He hasn't worked in 2 years. The truck is bad on gas so his D...

Jackie11 · Jackie11

I'm currently trying to wrap my brain around this... I got married last June. In marriage it's supposed to be about merging 2 lives, and making sacrifices for each other, loving each other and building a life. Currently the series at church is on marriage, based directly off the book the blessed marri...

GailMichelle · GailMichelle

Happy Heart Day! Here's a short youtube video that might soothe your heart if it's open the the messages. If not, perhaps another day. My wish for all of you is that you don't look at the closed door, but put your focus on the doors that are now open. That is one of the messages in this video that "pi...

lazzykat · lazzykat

Why is it that I am the one the feels like its my fault the my husband drinks? I keep thinking is it something that I did.

Mickki · Mickki

HI there. I have encountered a situation going on with the group I call my home group and I need some input. I have not seen anything like I am encountering in all the posts. Found alanon just when I needed it. I have been in al anon for about 18 months and have been pretty consistant in my weekly meetings. B...

GettingStronger · GettingStronger

Someone used the term "dry drunk" with me to explain when my exAH still exhibits the same thought processes as when he was drinking. We've been divorced nearly two years and he still continues to try to make amends... which would be endearing if it didn't always bring such a stark reality th...

TLD · TLD

well this just got worse. I have now had to involve victim services. He came home in a rage again at 3am on friday in which he virtually baited me to get mad. I chose to leave however, now he is saying i ran him over. Which is a load of crap and now he has phoned MCFD which is the ministry for children here an...

stephaniej · stephaniej

I'm coming to my MIPers for support and positive thoughts, since lord knows I haven't gotten any from my AH. But I don't want to make this post about my AH. My mom called me last night to tell me my brother had been in a bad car accident. Although I don't really identify my brother as my qualifier (he has h...

peacewithin · peacewithin

I been going through some health problems. and they thought I had cancer they wanted to do a biopsy. I was getting scared I never asked my AH for support in years. He knew what I was going through so he said he would go with me. I never told him how scared I was I just acted my strong self as I always been in our 33...

DreamsOver · DreamsOver

If you missed my post I will give you the back ground. I took my addicted son's dog to my home because she was not being cared for properly, I had her for almost two years. I told my son he could have the back when he could feed and care for her, he made no effort to do better. Then about a week and a half ago he c...

canadianguy · canadianguy

Hi All.... was wondering if I could get some information from the larger group regarding an issue that I didn't have to go through... This couple had a baby in early January - a healthy baby boy. Unknown to any of us, it appears that the mom is an alcoholic, and/or suffering from post-partum, or both......

stephaniej · stephaniej

My brother, who was in a car accident on Saturday night, has had substance abuse issues for years. He has said on numerous occasions that he is an atheist. To me, this photo is about as close as you can get to proof that a higher power was with him on Saturday night, regardless of whether he believes... ...

Michelle814 · Michelle814

Hello everyone! I am having an extraordinary Monday, let me tell you. I have been focusing on just a couple things lately because my brain began to malfunction and shut down from Al-Anon overload. Hahahaha! I want to thank everyone who provides me with ESH on this board. This is my life saver when I am...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Just saying...when is it going to end? I am still in a lot of pain & it has been a month! I am getting really impatient & want to stay in bed! I am wanting to stay on this computer so I can't go home yet & lie down. As soon as I get home, I am going to. Tomorrow I am going to my usual alanon meeting &...

emil · emil

I would like to introduce myself and tell my story. I am Emil. It seems like I have living with a family member with addiction issues all of my life. The stories are different, but the feelings are similar. I grew up in a large family; my Dad died when I was a young girl; after a year or two my Mom started...

John · John

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Onajourney_startingnow · Onajourney_startingnow

Hello, I am new here and want to share my story. I would like some guidance and support as I am working through some major transitions but am scared. My mother was an alcoholic and passed away 8 years ago. She basically gave up on herself a few years before her death. She was a binge drinker and basical...

Debilyn · Debilyn

every one of you who responded was so right. I had written back to all then somehow it disappeared. I hate that. She had been out to dinner, had two beers, came home had another. Opened email. She thought a letter someone had written to me, I had fw to her, was me to her!Hope that made sense. It was my mentor,...

danni · danni

There was a great reading in One Day at a Time in Al Anon today that really address how we react to hangovers. For those of you who know me, you know that the hangovers REALLY bother me, so I was glad to read this morning's passage. Just wanted to pass it along!

Pushka · Pushka

It was a rough weekend, .. I'm glad I had the kids. They kept me busy and we had a good time. I don't know why .. no, ... I do know why it was so hard. I just felt really emotionally raw. It was one simple text, nothing bad, nothing mean, just him reaching out. I am so angry at myself for it meaning so much to...

Ariel · Ariel

Can anyone recommend books other than "Getting Them Sober"? I already have vol 1&2. I am looking for something in the Kindle Store. The nearest bookstore is 35 mins away, but I'd be happy to drive to get some good ones. I also can't find any FTF meetings on Saturday afternoons or Sunda...

Rora · Rora

On a popular social networking site I had a friend making a remark that a well known singer who died after a long struggle with addiction should have seen that coming. It seemed cold to me. Normally I'd ignore it, but given my own experiences with deeply loving somone who suffers from Addiction and wa...

chicartista · chicartista

I have been married to my AH for nearly 10 years.

He has been in and out of recovery too many times for me to count.I knew he was an addict from the beginning.I had a profound love for him from the moment we met.When we were first going out, I caught him in my bathroom smoking crack.I could have dumped...

Very Very Tired · Very Very Tired

I know this is an Al-Anon and not AA board. But, I just need to put this somewhere because it is rattling my head and I'm not quite sure where to put it. I came into this program through Al-Anon. My AH is very active in his disease. My life has improved in ways I never imagined by going to F2F meetings, gettin...

nyc018 · nyc018

This isn't about an ultimatum to my AH but rather one my own family seems to be giving me. Long story short - AH's alcoholism hit a crisis point last summer. We got separated and he lost his job which is obviously bad news. After a 2 week stint in patient rehab and working an AA program and a good sponsor...

John · John

Just a quick reminder... see pic below...

Ariel · Ariel

I am in need of some friendly advice. I am doing all of the things it says in "Keeping Them Sober." I am detaching, not arguing, walking away, not letting him hook me in, taking more, doing nice things for myself, and *trying* not to get preoccupied with my ABF. It's really difficult. I told...

shimo · shimo

I am unable to honor my commitment to chair the Monday Al-Anon Meeting (Feb 13) as I am out of town for an appointment at that time. Hoping someone will be able to step up and chair the meeting in my absence. Thanks

Jerry F · Jerry F

One day at a time. I first arrived very oppositional and defiant and my attitude and behavior were unacceptable (but not unusual) for a newbie. I ranted and raved like I knew everything about anything expecially what was wrong with my alcoholic/addict wife and blah blah blah. I went to open AA me...

	Sub Forum	Topics	Posts	Last Post
	Al-anon speakers - Read Only Al-anon speakers	2	2	7 days ago by WebHelper
	Old sticky posts - Read Only Not sure what to do with these so parking them here.	6	91	Mar 10, 2026 by yopame7132

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Missed my meeting, came home to a drunk (Preview) UGH! I had to miss my meeting tonight because my mom is in town and I had to take her to another city for an accordion meeting(she performs in an accordion orchestra). Anyway, I came home, pulled in the garage, and there is a full empty bottle of wine on the front seat and a half drunk cup of wine in the cuph...	ilovedogs	8	472	Feb 18, 2012 by Lindaoakford
	feeling calmer (Preview) Ihad a psychologist appointment yesterday afternoon. I am starting to warm to her a little bit. I would want to.. I have seen her about 10 times now. It is just so hard to bring down those barriers to people. I find it hard to show on the outside what I am feeling on the inside. I am so used to hiding my tr...	Lindaoakford	9	609	Feb 18, 2012 by Lindaoakford
	quick question... (Preview) Is it EVER good to retaliate??? I've never felt this way before but right now I think that retaliation would make me feel a whole lot better.... ESH please	kris10	13	769	Feb 17, 2012 by orchidlover
	Higher Power (Preview) I am fairly new to AlAnon and just got home from a meeting about the second step. I shared my experience about my higher power and how my concept of that had changed over the years. Now I am concerned that I can no longer be an AlAnon member because if I keep going to meetings I cannot share my truth. Our gr...	agapi	9	697	Feb 17, 2012 by agapi
	Breaking Down (Preview) I'm back at step one. My life is out of control. I went into the steps here on the board hotrod a help posting on there. Here are some of the things i'm dealing with. Who in my life is making me feel crazy and causing stress ? The A if I let him. Who has been controling your emotions and other areas of my life ?...	peacewithin	11	443	Feb 17, 2012 by orchidlover
	I Feel Stuck in an Enabling/Codependant Living Situation (Preview) I know exactly what is going on - intellectually but (and I know but is a big word) I am having a really hard time with my present living situation. I lost my job and am living with my daughter and watching my granddaughter in exchange for rent. My daughter has started using cocaine on a regular basis and I...	SusanThomas	4	873	Feb 17, 2012 by orchidlover
	Inbox (Preview) How does one get into their inbox? I can click I have a message but the message will not come up. thank you ok something is wrong again. Says I have two messages I do not. Now it won't let me delete or edit my messages. Says I don't have the right to do this or something? yikes! -- Edited by Debilyn on Thursday...	Debilyn	4	413	Feb 17, 2012 by Pushka
	Feeling a little bad (Preview) Is it bad that I hope the AH gets convicted of this DUI? He may lose his job if he gets convicted but I dont care because I am hoping it will get him to his bottom and he will go to inpatient rehab. I even called the prosecuter as did his sister in order to testify against him. He has enabling parents who are help...	emmyboo2	6	580	Feb 17, 2012 by Michelle814
	How do you deal with your A's enablers? (Preview) Admittedly, I am in a highly unique situation. One of my AH's friends has been staying with us for six weeks. He recently started a job where my AH works, and has been using this time to save some money, get to know the area, and look for a place (his wife and daughter will be moving up here too, once they fi...	stephaniej	11	3824	Feb 17, 2012 by All I can be
	Post traumatic stress? (Preview) So, aside from my father who is a desperately sick, barely functioning alcoholic, my alcoholic husband, I also have a recovering drug addict sister. I tend to forget about the impact she has had on my sickness. She introduced me to drugs when I was young and I won't even get into how bad that was, but it's...	GreenerGrass	5	478	Feb 17, 2012 by Pushka
	I just can't get over this religion thing (Preview) So since I have been learning about my HP and all I have had this lingering feeling that the Christian God I grew up with is sooo mad at me. I keep asking myself if I could be going to hell if I don't believe in all of the bible. I am obsessing about it. I was raised to believe that I would go to hell if I didn't b...	daisy31	18	1051	Feb 17, 2012 by Christy
	Our site is down.... (Preview) Our site is currently down so access to the chatroom via the site entrance is not possible at this time. I am working diligently to get it back up and running asap. John	John	2	355	Feb 17, 2012 by Tracey C
	Support Letter (Preview) I have been in Al-Anon for several months. Recently, my daughter's ABF was put on a sabbatical because of his drinking. His supervisor told him that his job would be held for 30 days pending him going to in-patient rehab. Unfortunately this ABF does not have health insurance and I really don't thin...	robind78	6	707	Feb 17, 2012 by canadianguy
	emil's update (Preview) I spoke to my husband about returning to Al- Anon and returning to therapy. It was hard for him to understand- why would I need to go to therapy and meetings since he is not drinking. I really was able to communicate my struggles the past few months, my insecurities, my lack of trust, my resentments, an...	emil	5	459	Feb 16, 2012 by emil
	Apathetic (Preview) My soon to be ex is supposedly going on 6 months of sobriety. My lawyer is the only one who talks to him and my lawyer said that he was apethetic. I was wondering if it is normal to be apethetic while recovering from alcoholism or if he just does not care about me or the marriage? I was wondering if that is t...	ttpurtee	2	678	Feb 16, 2012 by Michelle814
	"Hurt people hurt people" (Preview) I heard that this weekend and it really struck me as to how true it is. In and of itself, it doesn't really mean anything. But I think it gives us an opportunity to step back, quit taking it personally, and remember that our alcoholics truly are sick. Definitely a new mantra for me...	usedtobeanyer	7	906	Feb 16, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Update this week (Preview) Thank you to everyone for your support. I am still at my parents and have met with victim services. They have confirmed my thoughts of the abuse I have put up for way too long. It's amazing that on my drive there, I thought, hm, is this the right thing to do? Yes, yes it is and I will pursue this. I feel ca...	TLD	7	474	Feb 16, 2012 by TLD
	Tuesday night java failure (Preview) Does anyone know why I can't get into the chatroom tonight? wp	wp	2	328	Feb 16, 2012 by wp
	It must be me? (Preview) My AH has relapsed. Smoking pot daily. So many don't know why it bothers me so much, but it does. I am trying to remain calm but I feel like my life is falling apart in front of my very eyes. My son is getting D's and F's in school, he is in middle school. He doesn't care and I don't know what to do. My daughter is a...	dragonflys	11	486	Feb 16, 2012 by stephaniej
	Trying to pick up the pieces (Preview) My husband has had an addiction to perscription pain pills for about 11 years now. For all these years I have taken care of almost everything, the house, our kids, his business and worked my own full time job. Last year he started to go to meetings and got clean. He has been for a year now. I hoped that t...	Tracy73	6	497	Feb 16, 2012 by wantinganswers
	Is this Codependant? (Preview) Okay, I do this thing on facebook. I will want to post a status of a saying that I love like today I posted "I am not perfect and that is fine with me". I really like that saying and posted it......only to go back and delete it 2 minutes later. I start thinking that someone will think I am weird e...	daisy31	9	493	Feb 16, 2012 by Lindaoakford
	Haven't posted for a while.. triggered and a bit lhigh strung (Preview) I haven't posted for a while. I have tried a few times but my internet access seemed to drop out, or it disappeared into the internet world somewhere... My last session with my psychologist nearly a fortnight ago knocked me around a bit. I posted the letter here I think. I am feeling better now but I was v...	Lindaoakford	4	464	Feb 16, 2012 by Lindaoakford
	Happy Valentines day! (Preview) Just wanted to wish everyone a happy Valentine's day. What are you all doing for V-day? My boys have a school party which I love being able to go to and get lots of cute pictures of them :) I bought my hubby a bag of his favorite licorice...how's that for romance ha! We don't do anything too special for V...	daisy31	7	436	Feb 15, 2012 by Michelle814
	Can we share some non-A type stuff? (Preview) I have been totally absorbed in A- and codependency-related stuff over the last few days, and it's definitely affecting my ability to stay serene. One of the things I really miss about having a "normal" life is just sharing random things about life. Since we've moved to a new area, I don't...	stephaniej	6	656	Feb 15, 2012 by stefani74
	frustration (Preview) Well for the second day in a row I can't access the room. So what techniques from our program will help me deal with this frustration? Is all this a test for us who are experiencing the same problem to really apply the program to this ? well for me I'm really not doing very well at it. lol but not funny. This ro...	sirchef	3	433	Feb 15, 2012 by likemyheart
	An exciting journey! (Preview) Well last night was our first Valentine's Day and it was our first night with all of our kids spending the night together with us. He's really working hard to be a better dad to his two and be a dad to mine as well. I am really proud of the effort he's making and he's very proud of his progress since becoming...	stefani74	1	394	Feb 15, 2012 by Michelle814
	spacious mind (Preview) Last weekend, my AH moved out. I had made the decision in early December, based on him breaking an important boundary, but we had agreed that we would keep living in the same house for 2 months, to give him time to figure out what he is going to do. So, on SAT, I helped him move all of his big stuff to a storag...	Iris lover of dogs	4	418	Feb 15, 2012 by never going back
	There are two things HP can't do (Preview) At least, this is true of my HP as I understand my HP to be. My HP can't stop loving me, and can't stop forgiving me.	stephaniej	6	438	Feb 15, 2012 by never going back
	It is not about me. It is not about me. It is not about me. (Preview) This is my mantra in this exact moment. A minor blowup on the phone, that I cut short by saying I love you, I'll talk to you later, good-bye. And now I'm fighting that co-dependent urge to call back, smooth things over, apologize for things I never did, just to make peace. But I know to do that would only...	stephaniej	7	521	Feb 15, 2012 by pinkchip
	you can take away the substance but the behavior remains. self-absorbed alcoholic alcoholic marriage getting married losing myself needs (Preview) Hi. This is my first post. I really don't want to make an outreach call but I don't want to isolate. I actually do want to isolate, stick my head in the sand and feel like a victim but I'm taking contrary action and typing away. Really feel so grateful for Al-Anon and the support I find here. I have a lot goin...	kel246	6	516	Feb 15, 2012 by surfgirl123
	Detachment Challenges When Finances are at Issue (Preview) I'm doing fine these days with emotional detachment with my AH, and being physically separated helps a lot, but the financial mess that my AH has created is not allowing me to stay on "my side of sidewalk." I can't just mind my own business and just work on myself when it comes to the IRS, our ho...	Green Eyes	7	611	Feb 15, 2012 by Breakingfree
	TICKED OFF! (Preview) I've been doing a really good job of detaching from my soon to be ex AH. Then my 15 year old tells me today that "Dad told me he needed money for his car insurance so I lent him $100..he says he will pay me back $150 next week" My A HAS a truck. He hasn't worked in 2 years. The truck is bad on gas so his D...	rehprof	5	495	Feb 15, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Conundrum (Preview) I'm currently trying to wrap my brain around this... I got married last June. In marriage it's supposed to be about merging 2 lives, and making sacrifices for each other, loving each other and building a life. Currently the series at church is on marriage, based directly off the book the blessed marri...	Jackie11	13	644	Feb 15, 2012 by Breakingfree
	A Few Messages For Your Heart (Preview) Happy Heart Day! Here's a short youtube video that might soothe your heart if it's open the the messages. If not, perhaps another day. My wish for all of you is that you don't look at the closed door, but put your focus on the doors that are now open. That is one of the messages in this video that "pi...	GailMichelle	4	470	Feb 15, 2012 by Yllek
	guilt (Preview) Why is it that I am the one the feels like its my fault the my husband drinks? I keep thinking is it something that I did.	lazzykat	10	514	Feb 15, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Just how anonymous is the meeting supposed to be? (Preview) HI there. I have encountered a situation going on with the group I call my home group and I need some input. I have not seen anything like I am encountering in all the posts. Found alanon just when I needed it. I have been in al anon for about 18 months and have been pretty consistant in my weekly meetings. B...	Mickki	10	823	Feb 15, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Why can't I just walk away? (Preview) Someone used the term "dry drunk" with me to explain when my exAH still exhibits the same thought processes as when he was drinking. We've been divorced nearly two years and he still continues to try to make amends... which would be endearing if it didn't always bring such a stark reality th...	GettingStronger	3	673	Feb 15, 2012 by Breakingfree
	From bad to worse (Preview) well this just got worse. I have now had to involve victim services. He came home in a rage again at 3am on friday in which he virtually baited me to get mad. I chose to leave however, now he is saying i ran him over. Which is a load of crap and now he has phoned MCFD which is the ministry for children here an...	TLD	10	624	Feb 15, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Car Accident (Preview) I'm coming to my MIPers for support and positive thoughts, since lord knows I haven't gotten any from my AH. But I don't want to make this post about my AH. My mom called me last night to tell me my brother had been in a bad car accident. Although I don't really identify my brother as my qualifier (he has h...	stephaniej	6	657	Feb 15, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Needed Support Should not of asked. (Preview) I been going through some health problems. and they thought I had cancer they wanted to do a biopsy. I was getting scared I never asked my AH for support in years. He knew what I was going through so he said he would go with me. I never told him how scared I was I just acted my strong self as I always been in our 33...	peacewithin	8	638	Feb 15, 2012 by Breakingfree
	I Got The Dog Back !! (Preview) If you missed my post I will give you the back ground. I took my addicted son's dog to my home because she was not being cared for properly, I had her for almost two years. I told my son he could have the back when he could feed and care for her, he made no effort to do better. Then about a week and a half ago he c...	DreamsOver	10	618	Feb 15, 2012 by Breakingfree
	alcoholism & breastfeeding (Preview) Hi All.... was wondering if I could get some information from the larger group regarding an issue that I didn't have to go through... This couple had a baby in early January - a healthy baby boy. Unknown to any of us, it appears that the mom is an alcoholic, and/or suffering from post-partum, or both......	canadianguy	7	4369	Feb 15, 2012 by Breakingfree
	HP is with us, whether or not we believe. (Preview) My brother, who was in a car accident on Saturday night, has had substance abuse issues for years. He has said on numerous occasions that he is an atheist. To me, this photo is about as close as you can get to proof that a higher power was with him on Saturday night, regardless of whether he believes... ...	stephaniej	3	330	Feb 14, 2012 by usedtobeanyer
	UP UP UP (Preview) Hello everyone! I am having an extraordinary Monday, let me tell you. I have been focusing on just a couple things lately because my brain began to malfunction and shut down from Al-Anon overload. Hahahaha! I want to thank everyone who provides me with ESH on this board. This is my life saver when I am...	Michelle814	3	421	Feb 14, 2012 by daisy31
	when is it going to end? (Preview) Just saying...when is it going to end? I am still in a lot of pain & it has been a month! I am getting really impatient & want to stay in bed! I am wanting to stay on this computer so I can't go home yet & lie down. As soon as I get home, I am going to. Tomorrow I am going to my usual alanon meeting &...	Hoot Nanny	1	384	Feb 14, 2012 by danni
	Introduce myself Hi I am Emil (Preview) I would like to introduce myself and tell my story. I am Emil. It seems like I have living with a family member with addiction issues all of my life. The stories are different, but the feelings are similar. I grew up in a large family; my Dad died when I was a young girl; after a year or two my Mom started...	emil	11	624	Feb 14, 2012 by SeekingAscension
	Physiology of Addiction (Video) (Preview) [video=]	John	1	416	Feb 14, 2012 by Debilyn
	New & looking for support :0) (Preview) Hello, I am new here and want to share my story. I would like some guidance and support as I am working through some major transitions but am scared. My mother was an alcoholic and passed away 8 years ago. She basically gave up on herself a few years before her death. She was a binge drinker and basical...	Onajourney_startingnow	3	592	Feb 14, 2012 by danni
	get the nail puller outer thing, experience with pain managemet anyone? (Preview) every one of you who responded was so right. I had written back to all then somehow it disappeared. I hate that. She had been out to dinner, had two beers, came home had another. Opened email. She thought a letter someone had written to me, I had fw to her, was me to her!Hope that made sense. It was my mentor,...	Debilyn	3	516	Feb 14, 2012 by Iris lover of dogs
	Hangover Helper (Preview) There was a great reading in One Day at a Time in Al Anon today that really address how we react to hangovers. For those of you who know me, you know that the hangovers REALLY bother me, so I was glad to read this morning's passage. Just wanted to pass it along!	danni	2	372	Feb 14, 2012 by danni
	My own worst enemy .. (Preview) It was a rough weekend, .. I'm glad I had the kids. They kept me busy and we had a good time. I don't know why .. no, ... I do know why it was so hard. I just felt really emotionally raw. It was one simple text, nothing bad, nothing mean, just him reaching out. I am so angry at myself for it meaning so much to...	Pushka	3	632	Feb 13, 2012 by danni
	Books & FTF Meetings (Preview) Can anyone recommend books other than "Getting Them Sober"? I already have vol 1&2. I am looking for something in the Kindle Store. The nearest bookstore is 35 mins away, but I'd be happy to drive to get some good ones. I also can't find any FTF meetings on Saturday afternoons or Sunda...	Ariel	7	900	Feb 13, 2012 by danni
	Addiction and the Media (Preview) On a popular social networking site I had a friend making a remark that a well known singer who died after a long struggle with addiction should have seen that coming. It seemed cold to me. Normally I'd ignore it, but given my own experiences with deeply loving somone who suffers from Addiction and wa...	Rora	8	755	Feb 13, 2012 by Jackie11
	Reestablishing Sexual Intimacy in Recovery sexual intimacy recovery sobriety alcoholic Al-Anon (Preview) I have been married to my AH for nearly 10 years. He has been in and out of recovery too many times for me to count.I knew he was an addict from the beginning.I had a profound love for him from the moment we met.When we were first going out, I caught him in my bathroom smoking crack.I could have dumped...	chicartista	7	11039	Feb 13, 2012 by All I can be
	Inventorying my own drinking (Preview) I know this is an Al-Anon and not AA board. But, I just need to put this somewhere because it is rattling my head and I'm not quite sure where to put it. I came into this program through Al-Anon. My AH is very active in his disease. My life has improved in ways I never imagined by going to F2F meetings, gettin...	Very Very Tired	23	710	Feb 13, 2012 by Michelle814
	Ultimatums (Preview) This isn't about an ultimatum to my AH but rather one my own family seems to be giving me. Long story short - AH's alcoholism hit a crisis point last summer. We got separated and he lost his job which is obviously bad news. After a 2 week stint in patient rehab and working an AA program and a good sponsor...	nyc018	7	612	Feb 13, 2012 by danni
	Remember.... (Preview) Just a quick reminder... see pic below...	John	5	492	Feb 13, 2012 by Pushka
	Solutions? (Preview) I am in need of some friendly advice. I am doing all of the things it says in "Keeping Them Sober." I am detaching, not arguing, walking away, not letting him hook me in, taking more, doing nice things for myself, and trying not to get preoccupied with my ABF. It's really difficult. I told...	Ariel	15	920	Feb 13, 2012 by Ariel
	MONDAY AL-ANON MEETING (Preview) I am unable to honor my commitment to chair the Monday Al-Anon Meeting (Feb 13) as I am out of town for an appointment at that time. Hoping someone will be able to step up and chair the meeting in my absence. Thanks	shimo	0	316	Feb 13, 2012 by shimo
	No matter how long's its been you can only do it (Preview) One day at a time. I first arrived very oppositional and defiant and my attitude and behavior were unacceptable (but not unusual) for a newbie. I ranted and raved like I knew everything about anything expecially what was wrong with my alcoholic/addict wife and blah blah blah. I went to open AA me...	Jerry F	10	582	Feb 13, 2012 by Jozie
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.