Al-Anon Family Group

The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.

Members Login
Username 
 
Password 
    Remember Me  
Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> QTIP, man
Post Info TOPIC: QTIP, man
Michelle814


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 818
Date:
QTIP, man
Permalink  

QtipQtipQtipQtip!

 

I had to let go of my power today. I keep grabbing hold. I don't think I have any power or control over my AH any longer. I feel pretty detached (with love)  but where I am having trouble is at work with people. I keep getting invited to arguments, invited into gossip, and invited into self consumed vent sessions of victimization.  Sometimes I can completely mind my own business with it all.. on other occasions I get sucked in!!! Help me, MIP friends, fill my spirit with ESH. I have been praying the serenity prayer and let go and let God, it works... I find myself sucked in again.  I become upset when a particular co-worker takes things out on me or purposely tries to make me look bad. I have to remember why I am upset.. its always my ego.  I have to remember to QTIP!! her problems are her own, quit taking it personally, Michelle, come on.  I think I need to give up control over this, inventory it, and humbly ask my HP to remove it.. it keeps poppping back up.. like weeds it sprouts. haha, I don't garden, literally, my front yard is always full of weeds..... oh man. Ive had a challenging week. I think my HP is putting me in the tough spot to work on myself.. I am teamed up with a hard person to work with.  I do love her as a person and I know her troubles are her own, she projects them onto me.  I become upset because it hurts my ego, ego, ego.  OH, thank God for al-anon.. my meeting was funny tonight!!  Any ESH appreciated.  Thanks.



__________________

Michelle!

No one can take away your peace of mind unless you let them.
Jerry F


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 13696
Date:
Permalink  

 

Major post and reach out Michelle.   I remember those moments also and I remember when they left also.  They left when I asked that fear be removed from me...fear of, fear from, fear to...fear.  And I learned to replace fear with acceptance.  In this case complete and total acceptance of another human being for exactly who they are and that doesn't enable affirming or accepting bad behaviors its accepting that they happen even against my desire or will to have them happen and the person is acceptable. 

The last time that was working for me was in Novermber on the 8th when two police officers where on my back having a go of me...venting I suggest.  What they did was completely unjustified and unacceptable while on the other hand I hold very little resentment against them personally.

You've grown good...keep up the practice, practice, practice.  ((((hugs))))smile



__________________
Breakingfree


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 3972
Date:
Permalink  

Great awareness! Keep up the good work!

__________________

Sending you love and support on your journey always! BreakingFree

Al-Anon/Alateen Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 800-344-2666

" Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional."

"Serenity is when your body and mind are in the same place."
Debilyn


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 3653
Date:
Permalink  

Hey remember we can only control what we do. All we can do is do our best and if the co worker is a putz, lettem.

You are cute, working hard and progressing. I live in the mountains so I cannot be pulled into bolony. though it stil finds me.

sometimes i just think ok it is me day. do not answer phone or door or anything I am turned off.

as far as the weeds, get a guinea pig and feed them to it. Heck with people sometimes. love!!!! debilyn



__________________

Putting HP first, always  <(*@*)>

"It's not so much being loved for ourselves, but more for being loved in spite of ourselves."

       http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/meetings/meeting.html            Or call: 1-888-4alanon
hotrod


~*Service Worker*~

Status: Offline
Posts: 17196
Date:
Permalink  

Michelle
 
Please remember it is Progress not Perfection.
 
You have accepted Step 1 and the powerlessness involved in you marriage. That is a really hard one to master.
 
Trust the process, Keep chipping away, use the slogans and know that eventually you will be responding differently from a more constructive place that has been uncovered.
 
Recovery takes time  You are doing fine


__________________
Betty

THE HIGHEST FORM OF WISDOM IS KINDNESS

Talmud
daisy31


Veteran Member

Status: Offline
Posts: 95
Date:
Permalink  

I feel for you Michelle, I have went through similar things and it is so frusterating yes! But look at your determination....wow....talk about strength! For me, I have been just saying to myself "stay in your own hula hoop Daisy" and that is all I can do to get through some things. Great awareness that your HP is putting you in this spot to grow you. I have so much faith in you friend! Hugs!

__________________

It is very difficult to have a pity party when I am celebrating all the gratitude I have in my life!

It will aither work out, . . . or, . . . It will work out."
Page 1 of 1  sorted by
 
Quick Reply

Please log in to post quick replies.
Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> QTIP, man