Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

cinders · cinders

With all the abusive blaming and other things that have gone on in my 10 years with my husband, you would think that I would be glad to have some distance, but I can't seem to keep from wanting to talk to him and try to understand what is going on. I had to email my soon to be ex and ask him to send paperwork relea...

bridgetp · bridgetp

I have to pick up my husband from the airport for his three weeks of holiday. I live in DUrban and he works in Nigeria and I discovered the last time he was home that he's been drinking and whoring all this time while I've been in total ignorance. Once I discovered what was g oing on his behaviour patterns...

callmemara · callmemara

In order to cheer me up, let's each list a FUNNY thing that our A does when they are in their A-zone. Mine takes bites of whole raw onions. That's right, I find whole onions with bites taken out of them in the fridge.

bmom · bmom

Hello, I'm bmom, which stands for the first letter of my AS's name and me being his mom. This is my first post and honestly, I'm so broken right now that words fail me...but I know they will come and I will share more. My AS is 28 years-old and says he is going to an AA meeting this Wednesday. I say, "I...

StargazerLily · StargazerLily

So, I'm up late stressing out. There is an empty bottle of Captain Morgan's on the counter and another one thats just over half full. They are the big ones, 1.75 liters. They go through about 4 of those a week. This is really hard for me to just admit that there may be an issue here. It would be so much easier t...

karren26 · karren26

Husband has been drinking heavy almost every night for a couple weeks with maybe a two day break in there. He did something stupid in front of twenty year old daughter and her boyfriend last night, I was not in the room. He embarrassed them. He is on Prozac so he gets drunk fast. He twists things around t...

WorkingThroughIt · WorkingThroughIt

I set boundaries about 4 days ago with parents after more abusive emails. I have not returned emails. I feel it wounds my spirit to be treated like that by anyone and my entire family has had no respect for me for years. All the family dysfunction was put on my shoulders when I was 12 so others wouldn't have...

abbyalana · abbyalana

I had two more adults in town pull me aside, concerned about my daughter, and telling me about my ex's new alcohlic/drug addict girlfriend that I know "nothing" (wink, wink) about and my daughter is nothing but pissed off about (she told me about the GF weeks ago, the ex and I do NOT talk at all...

hdftby100 · hdftby100

Here is my dilemma... My work schedule tends to be a little hectic sometimes. I have managed to go to 2 different group's meetings in my area. Both meetings had about 10 people there and I was the ONLY guy there. I didn't really feel like I could relate to anyone there. Maybe this was in part because th...

rellik · rellik

I don't know how else to say this other than it's working! Last Wednesday night she had her work Christmas party. They were drinking at her table and she couldn't take it. SHe didn't drink during the dinner, but she didn't make it home either. (27th day of sobriety) She stopped at three gas stations and...

stephaniej · stephaniej

Many of you know I have been looking for permanent employment for over a year. I had a long-term temporary job, but that ended about 6 weeks ago. The job market where I live is not good. Next Tuesday I will be interviewing for a government job. The salary is enough, the benefits would be good, and I thin...

rehprof · rehprof

So, this morning we have a snow day...I went out to my 16YO's room and it was 80 degrees...I asked him to turn the temp down...he then proceeded to tell me it was NOT hot in there...and I said...come on, hon, the pellets cost money..I've bought $60 in the last couple of weeks. He says "well Dad GAVE yo...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Good Morning all Well I got this text from my son. In reply to your vm which I just heard, yes I did hang up . I am not mad now at you in any way. I felt I was getting emotionally compromised. I will let you know what happens. I have plans to remove my pain, depression and anixiety forever. It is up to my son, G...

dancer_in_pain · dancer_in_pain

First of all, hello and glad to have found all of you here, though, not glad that we even need this forum. Here is my story. I am 58 years old, married to a man who is a functioning alcoholic, for 37 years, was dating him for 1.5 years before we married. He drinks beer, in early days beer and heavy liquor, s...

WorkingThroughIt · WorkingThroughIt

Only abut 4 days ago i cut contact with my family after the last straw of 25 years of scapegoatism, rejection, manipulation, and general insanity. I did my own work and they had their chance too...when i would end up in the hospital after suicide attempts due to depression and denial many a doctor refer...

hdftby100 · hdftby100

So yesterday I tell the wife that we should go see a movie last night. I gave about 4-5 choices and let her pick from there. She chose "Flight" with Denzel Washington. The description of the movie says NOTHING about the fact that the main story is really one of an alcoholic. I won't give aw...

Jozie · Jozie

You Know, Even after 4yrs of Recovery, this Disease of Addictions STILL Gets to me! Its Amazing how a Weekend Full of Hope & Happiness Can all be over shadowed by the Disease of Addictions... I'm Just Sick to Death of the Ones I love Leaving this World so Young... This Young Man...33 Use to stay with u...

Jill · Jill

Do you know after embracing AlAnon a whilethe program starts to show up in a lot of places? I was reading a magazine this morning. One of the cartoons had two cats strolling along, and one said to the other "It's live, live, live, live, live, live, live, live, live and let live, ...

AlAnonDave · AlAnonDave

For whatever reason, I have mixed feelings about the holidays. It brings back some difficult memories and definitely a lot of stress trying to get things done. Rolling back to when I was young- my Dad had custody of my older brother and I and he tried to make ends meet and did the best he could I think at mak...

Carla042 · Carla042

Greetings, I am struggling in a big way with family issues and I'm really in a bad place...Due to the issues that my older kids are having right now my family has basically alienated me and my kids and I'm having an extremely difficult time as family was everything to me. We were uninvited from Thanksgiv...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Is it OK not to take calls anymore. My son is enaging me a lot and now we got into a arguement about his car. He wants me to take it and I said NO...now he's mad that I'm so heartless on taking the gift. I think its alcohol time. He's thinks he moving to another country....WHAT??? Is it OK to be done with you...

tortuga · tortuga

I am moving towards this: but I have to say it's scary, because I used to believe in the good things I believed in true happiness, I also believed that it would be enough to love somebody with a true heart ... but in this disease I discovered also that no matter how much effort, love or hope I have in a day, it...

peacewithin · peacewithin

My AH has stopped drinking 4 months but its starting to get hard. Its as if he were drinking or worse. He blames me for everything. I walk on egg shells all the time you neve know what is going to set him off. last night every thing was fine. till he tried to get the dog in the house. and the dog wanted to stay out...

StargazerLily · StargazerLily

My parents moved in with us 3 months ago. They are active A's and drink every night. Things have started to get tense because of the drinking. I'm afraid of confronting them about anything. Afraid to say no, just like when I was a child. I don't want to cause issues because I don't want to see them homeless...

sookie · sookie

My husband, who doesn't live with me and his daughters anymore, is on probation for 2 DWI's. He has repeatedly shown up drunk and i know he has even gone to work drunk. If I call the police on him (which I threatened to do last night because he got wasted while being responsible for our kids), what will happ...

Brandi28 · Brandi28

Hi everyone, I'm completely new to this and just wanted to try and let go of some of my recent issues, so here goes...I have been brought up in an alcoholic home, my dad is now a dry drunk and my mum is an adult child in recovery. I'm 28 and although there haven't been any specific problems for a long time I ha...

sweeetr · sweeetr

im not sure if Im learning to cope or letting things get so out of hand I quit... I keep putting off seeing an attorney .. for money reasons and medical (some medical tests have come back bad on me) I will lose ins when divorce is final... But whats better die from cancer with sanity or live with total insani...

WornOutMrsFixIt · WornOutMrsFixIt

Changes and things that I have wanted to see are starting to happen and I have conflicting feelings about them. I definitely need some feedback. My AH of 26 years that I have been separated from since August has finally started seeing a psychiatrist, regularly attending AA meetings and even got a s...

shimo · shimo

MONDAY A.M. AL-ANON MEETINGS DEC 10 & 17 I am unable to chair the Monday morning Al-Anon meetings for December 10 & December 17. Hoping someone will be able to step-up and chair those meetings on my behalf. Thanks Shimo (aka Jeri)

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

He was coming into town tomorrow afternoon to do Christmas shopping and was going to stay at a local hotel and take the girls swimming. We talked on the phone and I even invited him over for lunch with us after we went to church, he said yes. Later conversation he said he wanted to hang out with me when I got d...

Pushka · Pushka

Well, this is a laugh at myself moment .. LOL .. it speaks volumes about how badly I allowed another person to treat me and now this is the norm for them. This is my part, now I'm asking for a change in this and it's been interesting to say the least. As I have already shared I am having zero contact if it is no...

sookie · sookie

Just needed to be here today. I have been still working my program with face to face meetings (2/week) but I feel I will need more support over the next months. I am going to end my marriage to the AH, who has now been struggling with his recovery in his own apartment for 18 months. Nothing is moving forward...

sweeetr · sweeetr

So I had to leave last night. I was on computer and his "chat sex live girl" popped on screen.And said welcome back guest360 ... pulled histrory and he had been talkinh and whatever sith her for at least A week He has never been one to cheat. I did the wrong thing. I went to bedroom Nd asked him abo...

hotrod · 255

Newcomer to the forum. First time back "home" to NYC where I lived for 7 years before moving out West and my life falling apart last Feb, started the program on Labor Day. Leading up to the trip I'm pretty much in the vigilance of the child of a diseased mother, afraid that when I leave here for m...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I need a good laugh! does anyone have a clean joke or anything to get us laughing at these somewhat difficult times for some and a joy for others? I am not just thinking of myself but all of you who need a laugh! Kathleen

Sister34 · Sister34

Well, it's my qualifier's birthday and my mom took her to the E.R. again. Here's a question: how many times have you taken your alcoholic to the E.R.? Ten? Twenty? Thirty? Forty? Fifty? Sixty? I have lost track. When she drinks, she drinks suicidally. Then at some point a few days later, once she ha...

slogan_jim · slogan_jim

Hey Everyone, There was a time before al-anon that in order to cope with life and all of the alcoholic's problems I had taught myself to not feel anything. I was walking around numb inside because I was tired of feeling hurt. Over my time in Al-Anon, I have learned that it's ok and even necessary to feel. T...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

My son called and was talking off the wall. He was sober but his mind is lost and not thinking right. It's so sad to listen to him. He wants me to take his things.... No he wants me to take his things so I will help him. It's not going to happen. He is so lost and confused now and I pray he will come to grips wi...

Tracy · Tracy

Hi All, just been away on a family programme for families of drinkers and drugs users, WOW Had the privealage to learn so much and do lots of group therapy amazin. One of the work shops was on family roles. e.g caretaker, scape goat, lost child, hero there were many more. I was the caretaker I would neg...

captain sensible · captain sensible

This is the first time that I have visited or posted on a forum. In brief, my husband was a functioning alcoholic when we got together some 13 years ago and has had stints at AA which were initially very positive for us both. He started to have an issue about confidentiality and stopped going. He used to wa...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Strong Cathy has just broken down and crying for having to say NO to my son. I did it but I am now freaking out and can't get it under control. He called about he is ******* if he is gets back to his place ( was in detox ) and is kicked out. I said nothing...just I'm sorry. All he's doing is complaining and...

WorkingThroughIt · WorkingThroughIt

I finally set the boundaries with mother & father. Very painful and difficult and guilt-provoking to take care of ourselves sometimes. Things simply had to get to a place for me where (without anger) I just could not envision myself at Christmas this year with them or my brother. I just got tired o...

sweeetr · sweeetr

So my moms 72 bday. My daughter and her fiance my 7 yr old all meeting at small restaurant to eat. My AH showed up early. I get a phone call he has ordered appitizers for everyone (It was a nice idea but he doesnt even know what anyone wants .. one of his drinking signature moves.. ordering for ppl and then if i...

Zimmy · Zimmy

abf was coming round with a curry and spend the night, he comes in and wanted me to watch a funny video on facebook, me, our son and him watched the video a couple of times (yeah it did make me chuckle) he kept saying you gotta watch it, you gotta watch it. I say to that "no i dont" and boom the atpmo...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Don't really have anyone to tell but I kind of had a anniversary on November 29th. I QUIT SMOKING 2 YEARS AND GOING STRONG Kind of proud of myself

debhud · debhud

hi all, does anyone know if they have alanon meetings specific to parents of alcoholics? or any good alanon approved literature on the subject? thanks, debbie

Sarah325 · Sarah325

police just called and woke us up...my niece called them...she said a serial killer was after her...her mother gave the police our number( really? Why?). I told them she was an alcoholic, they thought she was mentally ill. How could her mother not have told them? They took her to jail to sober up...I pr...

Lyne · Lyne

So here I am on Friday night. I have spent the day discussing with my spouse, why we are not close, why we are not romantic, and why we just can't be happy. I told her she is in denial about her multiple addictions: drinking, gambling, eating, and lying. She only recognizes eating as one of her problems. I t...

abbyalana · abbyalana

I divorced my alcoholic ex-husband after 16 years, 3 rehabs and 1 suicide attempt. I had to let go and choose healthy. That said, we share a 12 year old child. A great girl. Smart, funny, compassionate and truly well behaved. My ex really wasn't there for her during our marriage and at the heart of i...

Juliann · Juliann

I have been with my husband for 12 years. He was an alcoholic before we got together. Throughout the years he began to be an unmanageable alcoholic. Meaning he no longer worked a real job. Only helped out family/farmers for money. Would sleep until 2-3pm everyday and stay up late. our youngest is 4 mo...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Got a call from my son telling me is done and put himself into the hospital again. He has done this many times so we will see if he means it this time. He thought he could be put in a 30 day program but they told him no and will be sending him to detox only. He was shocked but I guess after many times going to th...

slverdream · slverdream

This is the first time I have visited this board and I am not sure where to start. I am married to a wonderful man, when we were married 4 years ago, of course I knew he had 2 adult daughters (at the time they were 19 and 21) The youngest lived with us, and she was in college, not a big deal I also have 3 children an...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Hi again Well it's been two weeks now that I have not talked to my son and I'm letting go and letting God do the work. It's been the hardest thing I ever had to do. I feel so guilty I'm abandoning him still but attending Al-anon meetings and see my counselor now. I'm lost, heartbroken and sad knowing he...

msblonde56 · msblonde56

Hi. First post, first realization of a problem in my marriage, first marriage, first experience with a possible alcoholic. I'm 28 years old and have been married for just a little over a year. My husband and I met and moved in quickly together, but we dated 4 years before we got engaged. I apparently...

Pushka · Pushka

Sooo .. I have been thinking about this for the past few days and something I am going to give myself as a gift is getting through steps 4 and 5 before the next court date which actually is NOT the 17th .. I just found out yesterday that it's Jan 8th .. LOL .. I recently said this is like a canker sore that won't g...

hdftby100 · hdftby100

Just wanted to share my experience last night. I had to work an extra shift at work (scheduled). While working, I thought to myself that the wife was probably at home drinking wine since I was not there. End to this story is this: When I got home she was in bed. I walked in the kitchen to get something to...

stephaniej · stephaniej

My AH was in a fight tonight. He bowls on Wednesday nights, and usually gets home around 1:00. When I woke up at 2:15, he still wasn't here. He rolled in around 2:30, and told me all about the fight he was in with some guy from work (not a guy he actually works with...just a guy who works in a different area...

el-cee · el-cee

I have just discovered this fabulous site. I have been a grateful Al-Anon member for around 8 months and although I have a lot to learn I have already learned so much. I know I am on a journey although I have recently resorted to my default mode which is being controlling and obsessive. I have hope though...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Got that call from my son and I just let him talk about what he has started, done and will be doing. All good. I can only pray he will follow through. What I did.....which was very small for some but BIG BIG BIG for me. I had told him I would not be taking or picking him up from the hospitals or detox center a...

slogan_jim · slogan_jim

Hi everyone, my name is Slogan_Jim and I am a grateful member of the worldwide fellowship of al-anon.Growing up in an alcoholic home, you see and experience things a certain way. A different way that doesnt promote a lot of hope, happiness or that wonderful things will ever or are meant to happen to you...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Struggling with attempting to have no contact (Preview) With all the abusive blaming and other things that have gone on in my 10 years with my husband, you would think that I would be glad to have some distance, but I can't seem to keep from wanting to talk to him and try to understand what is going on. I had to email my soon to be ex and ask him to send paperwork relea...	cinders	14	809	Dec 12, 2012 by pinkchip
	coping with him coming home (Preview) I have to pick up my husband from the airport for his three weeks of holiday. I live in DUrban and he works in Nigeria and I discovered the last time he was home that he's been drinking and whoring all this time while I've been in total ignorance. Once I discovered what was g oing on his behaviour patterns...	bridgetp	4	328	Dec 12, 2012 by bridgetp
	Something funny (Preview) In order to cheer me up, let's each list a FUNNY thing that our A does when they are in their A-zone. Mine takes bites of whole raw onions. That's right, I find whole onions with bites taken out of them in the fridge.	callmemara	6	498	Dec 12, 2012 by rehprof
	Does a mother's heart every stop breaking? (Preview) Hello, I'm bmom, which stands for the first letter of my AS's name and me being his mom. This is my first post and honestly, I'm so broken right now that words fail me...but I know they will come and I will share more. My AS is 28 years-old and says he is going to an AA meeting this Wednesday. I say, "I...	bmom	8	486	Dec 12, 2012 by bmom
	Up late stressing (Preview) So, I'm up late stressing out. There is an empty bottle of Captain Morgan's on the counter and another one thats just over half full. They are the big ones, 1.75 liters. They go through about 4 of those a week. This is really hard for me to just admit that there may be an issue here. It would be so much easier t...	StargazerLily	2	296	Dec 12, 2012 by bud
	After 21 years REALLY confronted him (Preview) Husband has been drinking heavy almost every night for a couple weeks with maybe a two day break in there. He did something stupid in front of twenty year old daughter and her boyfriend last night, I was not in the room. He embarrassed them. He is on Prozac so he gets drunk fast. He twists things around t...	karren26	15	567	Dec 12, 2012 by karren26
	Stand up or tolerate? (Preview) I set boundaries about 4 days ago with parents after more abusive emails. I have not returned emails. I feel it wounds my spirit to be treated like that by anyone and my entire family has had no respect for me for years. All the family dysfunction was put on my shoulders when I was 12 so others wouldn't have...	WorkingThroughIt	6	491	Dec 11, 2012 by AStrongerMe
	I am really trying to not be crazed but feeling that way anyways (Preview) I had two more adults in town pull me aside, concerned about my daughter, and telling me about my ex's new alcohlic/drug addict girlfriend that I know "nothing" (wink, wink) about and my daughter is nothing but pissed off about (she told me about the GF weeks ago, the ex and I do NOT talk at all...	abbyalana	5	440	Dec 11, 2012 by AStrongerMe
	Online meetings as opposed to Face to Face? (Preview) Here is my dilemma... My work schedule tends to be a little hectic sometimes. I have managed to go to 2 different group's meetings in my area. Both meetings had about 10 people there and I was the ONLY guy there. I didn't really feel like I could relate to anyone there. Maybe this was in part because th...	hdftby100	3	511	Dec 11, 2012 by Breakingfree
	It's working!!!!! (Preview) I don't know how else to say this other than it's working! Last Wednesday night she had her work Christmas party. They were drinking at her table and she couldn't take it. SHe didn't drink during the dinner, but she didn't make it home either. (27th day of sobriety) She stopped at three gas stations and...	rellik	6	389	Dec 11, 2012 by Desirae
	I have a job interview (Preview) Many of you know I have been looking for permanent employment for over a year. I had a long-term temporary job, but that ended about 6 weeks ago. The job market where I live is not good. Next Tuesday I will be interviewing for a government job. The salary is enough, the benefits would be good, and I thin...	stephaniej	5	345	Dec 11, 2012 by tiredtonite
	Pellet Stove VENT! (Preview) So, this morning we have a snow day...I went out to my 16YO's room and it was 80 degrees...I asked him to turn the temp down...he then proceeded to tell me it was NOT hot in there...and I said...come on, hon, the pellets cost money..I've bought $60 in the last couple of weeks. He says "well Dad GAVE yo...	rehprof	5	465	Dec 11, 2012 by Jerry F
	Let go Let God (Preview) Good Morning all Well I got this text from my son. In reply to your vm which I just heard, yes I did hang up . I am not mad now at you in any way. I felt I was getting emotionally compromised. I will let you know what happens. I have plans to remove my pain, depression and anixiety forever. It is up to my son, G...	Cathyinaz	8	462	Dec 11, 2012 by Jerry F
	I am new here, new to Al Anon and in pain, like us all (Preview) First of all, hello and glad to have found all of you here, though, not glad that we even need this forum. Here is my story. I am 58 years old, married to a man who is a functioning alcoholic, for 37 years, was dating him for 1.5 years before we married. He drinks beer, in early days beer and heavy liquor, s...	dancer_in_pain	11	689	Dec 11, 2012 by dancer_in_pain
	Threatening calls from parent & chaos in my life (Preview) Only abut 4 days ago i cut contact with my family after the last straw of 25 years of scapegoatism, rejection, manipulation, and general insanity. I did my own work and they had their chance too...when i would end up in the hospital after suicide attempts due to depression and denial many a doctor refer...	WorkingThroughIt	3	289	Dec 11, 2012 by WorkingThroughIt
	Ironic movie choice (Preview) So yesterday I tell the wife that we should go see a movie last night. I gave about 4-5 choices and let her pick from there. She chose "Flight" with Denzel Washington. The description of the movie says NOTHING about the fact that the main story is really one of an alcoholic. I won't give aw...	hdftby100	3	304	Dec 11, 2012 by Aloha
	Death By Disease... (Preview) You Know, Even after 4yrs of Recovery, this Disease of Addictions STILL Gets to me! Its Amazing how a Weekend Full of Hope & Happiness Can all be over shadowed by the Disease of Addictions... I'm Just Sick to Death of the Ones I love Leaving this World so Young... This Young Man...33 Use to stay with u...	Jozie	7	478	Dec 11, 2012 by orchidlover
	It's Everywhere (Preview) Do you know after embracing AlAnon a whilethe program starts to show up in a lot of places? I was reading a magazine this morning. One of the cartoons had two cats strolling along, and one said to the other "It's live, live, live, live, live, live, live, live, live and let live, ...	Jill	1	335	Dec 10, 2012 by Path to Serenity
	Holidays- a tough time of year for me (Preview) For whatever reason, I have mixed feelings about the holidays. It brings back some difficult memories and definitely a lot of stress trying to get things done. Rolling back to when I was young- my Dad had custody of my older brother and I and he tried to make ends meet and did the best he could I think at mak...	AlAnonDave	14	593	Dec 10, 2012 by Carla042
	Struggling... (Preview) Greetings, I am struggling in a big way with family issues and I'm really in a bad place...Due to the issues that my older kids are having right now my family has basically alienated me and my kids and I'm having an extremely difficult time as family was everything to me. We were uninvited from Thanksgiv...	Carla042	6	521	Dec 10, 2012 by Carla042
	Getting anger and pity party calls (Preview) Is it OK not to take calls anymore. My son is enaging me a lot and now we got into a arguement about his car. He wants me to take it and I said NO...now he's mad that I'm so heartless on taking the gift. I think its alcohol time. He's thinks he moving to another country....WHAT??? Is it OK to be done with you...	Cathyinaz	14	786	Dec 10, 2012 by Path to Serenity
	scared with letting go of the things that makes you sad (Preview) I am moving towards this: but I have to say it's scary, because I used to believe in the good things I believed in true happiness, I also believed that it would be enough to love somebody with a true heart ... but in this disease I discovered also that no matter how much effort, love or hope I have in a day, it...	tortuga	11	517	Dec 10, 2012 by one_moment
	Living with a dry drunk (Preview) My AH has stopped drinking 4 months but its starting to get hard. Its as if he were drinking or worse. He blames me for everything. I walk on egg shells all the time you neve know what is going to set him off. last night every thing was fine. till he tried to get the dog in the house. and the dog wanted to stay out...	peacewithin	8	2734	Dec 10, 2012 by AlAnonDave
	Having a hard time. (Preview) My parents moved in with us 3 months ago. They are active A's and drink every night. Things have started to get tense because of the drinking. I'm afraid of confronting them about anything. Afraid to say no, just like when I was a child. I don't want to cause issues because I don't want to see them homeless...	StargazerLily	3	376	Dec 10, 2012 by Jen
	When do you call the police? (Preview) My husband, who doesn't live with me and his daughters anymore, is on probation for 2 DWI's. He has repeatedly shown up drunk and i know he has even gone to work drunk. If I call the police on him (which I threatened to do last night because he got wasted while being responsible for our kids), what will happ...	sookie	5	580	Dec 10, 2012 by abbyalana
	Newbie (Preview) Hi everyone, I'm completely new to this and just wanted to try and let go of some of my recent issues, so here goes...I have been brought up in an alcoholic home, my dad is now a dry drunk and my mum is an adult child in recovery. I'm 28 and although there haven't been any specific problems for a long time I ha...	Brandi28	4	367	Dec 10, 2012 by Breakingfree
	tonight im ready to quit ! (Preview) im not sure if Im learning to cope or letting things get so out of hand I quit... I keep putting off seeing an attorney .. for money reasons and medical (some medical tests have come back bad on me) I will lose ins when divorce is final... But whats better die from cancer with sanity or live with total insani...	sweeetr	5	429	Dec 10, 2012 by Lyne
	Too late? (Preview) Changes and things that I have wanted to see are starting to happen and I have conflicting feelings about them. I definitely need some feedback. My AH of 26 years that I have been separated from since August has finally started seeing a psychiatrist, regularly attending AA meetings and even got a s...	WornOutMrsFixIt	4	669	Dec 10, 2012 by Jen
	MONDAY A.M. AL-ANON MEETINGS DEC 10 & 17 (Preview) MONDAY A.M. AL-ANON MEETINGS DEC 10 & 17 I am unable to chair the Monday morning Al-Anon meetings for December 10 & December 17. Hoping someone will be able to step-up and chair those meetings on my behalf. Thanks Shimo (aka Jeri)	shimo	1	306	Dec 10, 2012 by Overcome
	My exAH is so sick and just sunk further...... (Preview) He was coming into town tomorrow afternoon to do Christmas shopping and was going to stay at a local hotel and take the girls swimming. We talked on the phone and I even invited him over for lunch with us after we went to church, he said yes. Later conversation he said he wanted to hang out with me when I got d...	Breakingfree	6	421	Dec 10, 2012 by Jerry F
	Left Overs :/ (Preview) Well, this is a laugh at myself moment .. LOL .. it speaks volumes about how badly I allowed another person to treat me and now this is the norm for them. This is my part, now I'm asking for a change in this and it's been interesting to say the least. As I have already shared I am having zero contact if it is no...	Pushka	9	409	Dec 10, 2012 by Jerry F
	Trying to move forward (Preview) Just needed to be here today. I have been still working my program with face to face meetings (2/week) but I feel I will need more support over the next months. I am going to end my marriage to the AH, who has now been struggling with his recovery in his own apartment for 18 months. Nothing is moving forward...	sookie	8	444	Dec 9, 2012 by Jen
	Update on tonight I'm ready to quit .. Next morning (Preview) So I had to leave last night. I was on computer and his "chat sex live girl" popped on screen.And said welcome back guest360 ... pulled histrory and he had been talkinh and whatever sith her for at least A week He has never been one to cheat. I did the wrong thing. I went to bedroom Nd asked him abo...	sweeetr	4	462	Dec 9, 2012 by sweeetr
	Meeting recommendations for NYC help NYC recommendations Brooklyn travel advice meeting recommendations (Preview) Newcomer to the forum. First time back "home" to NYC where I lived for 7 years before moving out West and my life falling apart last Feb, started the program on Labor Day. Leading up to the trip I'm pretty much in the vigilance of the child of a diseased mother, afraid that when I leave here for m...	255	4	8430	Dec 9, 2012 by hotrod
	NEED A LAUGH! (Preview) I need a good laugh! does anyone have a clean joke or anything to get us laughing at these somewhat difficult times for some and a joy for others? I am not just thinking of myself but all of you who need a laugh! *Kathleen*	Hoot Nanny	8	276	Dec 9, 2012 by Jen
	Feeling so "done" with the E.R. .An angry, grim post. (Preview) Well, it's my qualifier's birthday and my mom took her to the E.R. again. Here's a question: how many times have you taken your alcoholic to the E.R.? Ten? Twenty? Thirty? Forty? Fifty? Sixty? I have lost track. When she drinks, she drinks suicidally. Then at some point a few days later, once she ha...	Sister34	8	475	Dec 9, 2012 by Breakingfree
	I just cried watching 'The Simpsons'. (program at work) (Preview) Hey Everyone, There was a time before al-anon that in order to cope with life and all of the alcoholic's problems I had taught myself to not feel anything. I was walking around numb inside because I was tired of feeling hurt. Over my time in Al-Anon, I have learned that it's ok and even necessary to feel. T...	slogan_jim	6	477	Dec 9, 2012 by Breakingfree
	It's so sad to hear him so lost (Preview) My son called and was talking off the wall. He was sober but his mind is lost and not thinking right. It's so sad to listen to him. He wants me to take his things.... No he wants me to take his things so I will help him. It's not going to happen. He is so lost and confused now and I pray he will come to grips wi...	Cathyinaz	11	553	Dec 9, 2012 by Cathyinaz
	family roles (Preview) Hi All, just been away on a family programme for families of drinkers and drugs users, WOW Had the privealage to learn so much and do lots of group therapy amazin. One of the work shops was on family roles. e.g caretaker, scape goat, lost child, hero there were many more. I was the caretaker I would neg...	Tracy	5	790	Dec 9, 2012 by one_moment
	How worried should I be? (Preview) This is the first time that I have visited or posted on a forum. In brief, my husband was a functioning alcoholic when we got together some 13 years ago and has had stints at AA which were initially very positive for us both. He started to have an issue about confidentiality and stopped going. He used to wa...	captain sensible	6	546	Dec 9, 2012 by maryjane
	Crying and not in control (Preview) Strong Cathy has just broken down and crying for having to say NO to my son. I did it but I am now freaking out and can't get it under control. He called about he is ******* if he is gets back to his place ( was in detox ) and is kicked out. I said nothing...just I'm sorry. All he's doing is complaining and...	Cathyinaz	15	510	Dec 8, 2012 by Path to Serenity
	Boundaries are in place (Preview) I finally set the boundaries with mother & father. Very painful and difficult and guilt-provoking to take care of ourselves sometimes. Things simply had to get to a place for me where (without anger) I just could not envision myself at Christmas this year with them or my brother. I just got tired o...	WorkingThroughIt	8	462	Dec 8, 2012 by glad lee
	my moms bday dinner and AH shows up arrogantly drinking/drunk (Preview) So my moms 72 bday. My daughter and her fiance my 7 yr old all meeting at small restaurant to eat. My AH showed up early. I get a phone call he has ordered appitizers for everyone (It was a nice idea but he doesnt even know what anyone wants .. one of his drinking signature moves.. ordering for ppl and then if i...	sweeetr	6	428	Dec 8, 2012 by Zimmy
	Surprise Surprise.... (Preview) abf was coming round with a curry and spend the night, he comes in and wanted me to watch a funny video on facebook, me, our son and him watched the video a couple of times (yeah it did make me chuckle) he kept saying you gotta watch it, you gotta watch it. I say to that "no i dont" and boom the atpmo...	Zimmy	5	482	Dec 8, 2012 by Zimmy
	Anniversary (Preview) Don't really have anyone to tell but I kind of had a anniversary on November 29th. I QUIT SMOKING 2 YEARS AND GOING STRONG Kind of proud of myself	Cathyinaz	5	225	Dec 8, 2012 by Cathyinaz
	are there "parents of alcoholics" alanon meetings? (Preview) hi all, does anyone know if they have alanon meetings specific to parents of alcoholics? or any good alanon approved literature on the subject? thanks, debbie	debhud	4	3002	Dec 8, 2012 by AlAnonDave
	Police just called, now what? (Preview) police just called and woke us up...my niece called them...she said a serial killer was after her...her mother gave the police our number( really? Why?). I told them she was an alcoholic, they thought she was mentally ill. How could her mother not have told them? They took her to jail to sober up...I pr...	Sarah325	7	456	Dec 8, 2012 by Jerry F
	ring around the rosie (Preview) So here I am on Friday night. I have spent the day discussing with my spouse, why we are not close, why we are not romantic, and why we just can't be happy. I told her she is in denial about her multiple addictions: drinking, gambling, eating, and lying. She only recognizes eating as one of her problems. I t...	Lyne	2	417	Dec 8, 2012 by hotrod
	Frustrated. Rough night with my kiddo. (Preview) I divorced my alcoholic ex-husband after 16 years, 3 rehabs and 1 suicide attempt. I had to let go and choose healthy. That said, we share a 12 year old child. A great girl. Smart, funny, compassionate and truly well behaved. My ex really wasn't there for her during our marriage and at the heart of i...	abbyalana	6	414	Dec 8, 2012 by Mattie
	Don't know what to expect (Preview) I have been with my husband for 12 years. He was an alcoholic before we got together. Throughout the years he began to be an unmanageable alcoholic. Meaning he no longer worked a real job. Only helped out family/farmers for money. Would sleep until 2-3pm everyday and stay up late. our youngest is 4 mo...	Juliann	6	407	Dec 7, 2012 by hdftby100
	Son in Hospital (Preview) Got a call from my son telling me is done and put himself into the hospital again. He has done this many times so we will see if he means it this time. He thought he could be put in a 30 day program but they told him no and will be sending him to detox only. He was shocked but I guess after many times going to th...	Cathyinaz	10	527	Dec 7, 2012 by Sarah325
	Not sure where to start or what to do (Preview) This is the first time I have visited this board and I am not sure where to start. I am married to a wonderful man, when we were married 4 years ago, of course I knew he had 2 adult daughters (at the time they were 19 and 21) The youngest lived with us, and she was in college, not a big deal I also have 3 children an...	slverdream	6	564	Dec 7, 2012 by Sarah325
	From I need help to Getting help (Preview) Hi again Well it's been two weeks now that I have not talked to my son and I'm letting go and letting God do the work. It's been the hardest thing I ever had to do. I feel so guilty I'm abandoning him still but attending Al-anon meetings and see my counselor now. I'm lost, heartbroken and sad knowing he...	Cathyinaz	4	431	Dec 7, 2012 by Sarah325
	The self-loathing new husband new marriage self-loathing husband alcohol issues self-abuse verbal abuse control (Preview) Hi. First post, first realization of a problem in my marriage, first marriage, first experience with a possible alcoholic. I'm 28 years old and have been married for just a little over a year. My husband and I met and moved in quickly together, but we dated 4 years before we got engaged. I apparently...	msblonde56	8	4682	Dec 7, 2012 by SuzanneSC
	New Awareness and a major Do'h moment .. (Preview) Sooo .. I have been thinking about this for the past few days and something I am going to give myself as a gift is getting through steps 4 and 5 before the next court date which actually is NOT the 17th .. I just found out yesterday that it's Jan 8th .. LOL .. I recently said this is like a canker sore that won't g...	Pushka	8	479	Dec 7, 2012 by tiredtonite
	Small or big victory... or both (Preview) Just wanted to share my experience last night. I had to work an extra shift at work (scheduled). While working, I thought to myself that the wife was probably at home drinking wine since I was not there. End to this story is this: When I got home she was in bed. I walked in the kitchen to get something to...	hdftby100	8	399	Dec 7, 2012 by tiredtonite
	VERY grateful for my program right now (Preview) My AH was in a fight tonight. He bowls on Wednesday nights, and usually gets home around 1:00. When I woke up at 2:15, he still wasn't here. He rolled in around 2:30, and told me all about the fight he was in with some guy from work (not a guy he actually works with...just a guy who works in a different area...	stephaniej	4	501	Dec 7, 2012 by Breakingfree
	New to online Al-Anon (Preview) I have just discovered this fabulous site. I have been a grateful Al-Anon member for around 8 months and although I have a lot to learn I have already learned so much. I know I am on a journey although I have recently resorted to my default mode which is being controlling and obsessive. I have hope though...	el-cee	3	277	Dec 7, 2012 by Breakingfree
	My program at work...you betch ya (Preview) Got that call from my son and I just let him talk about what he has started, done and will be doing. All good. I can only pray he will follow through. What I did.....which was very small for some but BIG BIG BIG for me. I had told him I would not be taking or picking him up from the hospitals or detox center a...	Cathyinaz	4	330	Dec 7, 2012 by Breakingfree
	Labelling oneself/expectations (share) (Preview) Hi everyone, my name is Slogan_Jim and I am a grateful member of the worldwide fellowship of al-anon.Growing up in an alcoholic home, you see and experience things a certain way. A different way that doesnt promote a lot of hope, happiness or that wonderful things will ever or are meant to happen to you...	slogan_jim	1	350	Dec 6, 2012 by tortuga
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.