The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Well it's been two weeks now that I have not talked to my son and I'm letting go and letting God do the work. It's been the hardest thing I ever had to do. I feel so guilty I'm abandoning him still but attending Al-anon meetings and see my counselor now. I'm lost, heartbroken and sad knowing he will be homeless and I will have to say no when he comes for my help. Can I say NO......can I say "it's not a option". Can I handle it.
I love him so.....
Thank you...just needed to vent
Cathy
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Lord, put your arm around my shoulder and your hand over my mouth
Speak only when you feel that your words are better than your silence.
I'm with you ((cathy)) it is sad. It's okay to be powerless and sad. Trusting a Power Greater than myself is better than me trying to fix it though, that's for sure. God is waaaay bigger than I am. We can keep praying, that's the best help we can give anyone.
Have you heard the saying, Everything I let go of has scratch marks all over it? you are not alone, my friend, my sponsor always told me to just keep practicing. Practice trusting Higher power, she said. In the early days she told me to put up post-it notes around the house as a reminder, thank you God, I trust you.
You are taking steps to care for YOU now, that's good news. we'll keep trudging this road together ((hugs))
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The prayer isn't for Higher Power to change our lives, but rather to change us.
Aloha Cathy...when you accept the truth that the program brings to you the guilt and shame and feelings of failure go away. The 3Cs are some of the first truths. The reality that this is his disease and like all sick people he must seek his own healing is another. It is your nature to be a loving caring mother and that will never change what has changed his how you care and love now. The highest form of care for me was learning how to step out of the way of that thing that I could never do and allowing God in God's infinite wisdom and mercy take over. Both my Alcoholic/addict and I had to learn the very same thing to attain the very same outcome and so it is with you and with your son. You will never not be loving and caring...and that is HP's will. Thank you for mentoring that here. Keep coming back (((((hugs)))))
Just reading this is a help...you remind me that I have to let her figure it out...she (niece) is 34 years old, has been in a 28 day program last spring, been in many ,any aa meetings, most of which took place on a day when she was drinking. We went to one together, we cried there at the awful stories, she said she was so lucky that she had support and then she went home and picked up...she sure faked the right emotions...or the disease is just so terrible that she can't help it...
When she picked up and went to another aa meeting the next day, she did not want to pick up another white chip...said she felt like a loser...embarrassed! That strikes me funny!
