Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

scaredandconfused · scaredandconfused

I received notice yesterday that my husband's car which is financed in both our names is far enough behind on payments it's being sent to collections for repossession. This car was purchased last year and was supposed to be totally his responsibility to pay for. This is the third car we have financed t...

Debilyn · Debilyn

The day before I was goofin in Goodwill. This guy was looking and started talking. I made quick answers and moved on. so did he. Later was teasing to put his stuff in my cart. Was a freaking pest, probably thought he was cute. geez. I have gone down 3 sizes now. Wearing a bit of makeup, looks natural, doing...

1976love · 1976love

Not sure how to take this latest episode. My son was suppose to clean his room yesterday. My recovering AH realized it was not done to his standard and confronted him. When my son huffed and puffed at him my AH went into a rage...grabbed him and ripped his shirt right off his body. We were gonna go to ch...

blondie99 · blondie99

So I was up before the dawn this morning. In my part of the world, spring is slowly starting to come to life. There's no leaves showing on the trees and the grass is still brown, but I see little stirrings happening. The wind is getting a little warmer, the sun is staying up longer. Outside my window, I hea...

slogan_jim · slogan_jim

Hi Everyone, As I've mentioned in the past, I attend a support group fellowship regularly. This past week I heard the news that a long-time member had passed away. Terry and I had crossed paths a few times. Shaken hands, said hi and had small conversation. I would not say I was particularly close wi...

hopeful68 · hopeful68

I came across this board yesterday and have been reading posts and want to share my story. I have been married to my husband for 11 yrs, has always drank, I've known he has had a problem with it for many yrs now and its gotten worse. the last 8 months have been pure hell, a constant roller coaster ride. I have...

el-cee · el-cee

I love this guy!

Debilyn · Debilyn

I am working on so many things. On not hiding myself, dressing more feminine, not being afraid to go out in public. Then next thing i know I am sitting next to a murderer A in a bus. I am one that cannot take much and it tears my guts out. Then I isolate myself. Do my best to keep in light, but inside it churns lik...

1976love · 1976love

So my AH has been doing 90 in 90. Currently is on day 82. Last week he needed an annual physical due to his job. He went and got his bloodwork back and I was startled by what they told him. Everything was fine BUT his platelet count was low and the Dr advised him to not drink any alcohol. I never heard of lo...

KLotus · KLotus

I have filed for divorce, after 4 years of marriage, from my abusive AH. About a month ago, I realized that I felt I couldn't do this anymore - I stopped trying to fix and change everything, and tried to focus as much as I could on me and on my 2 year old child. I was being drained by my AH's constant irritabi...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Hi All: I don't know; am really feeling it tonight like I am being tested or something! I have been going to meetings, f2f and here in the chat room, have been reading daily, the literature and posts here and I thought I was moving to a more positive place....over the past month my AH has told me 5 times he w...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

It's funny.....I think because my son has been sober for a while and he wanted to make amends and help me why I would think OK....this time it's going to end and be different. He has changed. My son did a computer job last week and made 60 dollars ( one hours work). He then came up and did some yard work f...

RobinKSC · RobinKSC

I am very grateful for the program today, grateful for some great face to face meetings and online meetings this week. Gratefull for a big relief socially that happened this week.

blondie99 · blondie99

Well fellow MIPers, tomorrow is the big day - the one I have been preparing for for the last two weeks. I have all the paperwork ready, I have my letter ready to read and I'm heading to bed now for a good night's sleep before the three hour drive to my AH's rehab facility early tomorrow morning. I cannot than...

Bluy0 · Bluy0

Some people from the program encourage me to study medicine. I know it is better in the long run. Though I doubt my powers. I was never good at the subjects like chemistry, biology and maths. I am neither used to study a lot. I know everything is possible if I know I can. But it is something so big and unusual...

Tracey C · Tracey C

A.)) What is "Getting Them Sober"? -------- "Getting Them Sober'', by Toby Rice Drews, is the million-selling series of books ----- endorsed by 'dear Abby', by Dr. Norman Vincent Peale, and by Melody Beattie (author of ''Codependent No More'', who wrote, '' 'G...

tortuga · tortuga

Well yes, it has to happen I guess. ABF is gone since over a week, and we have no contact at all, so I am back to fighting my own feelings. Whereas i was quite balanced before I met him, much more advanced in my own recovery, I am now a lost mess. Memories of a strong and happy me seems to be just a reminder of bett...

Clueless Optimist · Clueless Optimist

Hello all. I'm new to this board. My husband is an alcoholic and also addicted to Spice, the fake marijuana. He was supposed to start his outpatient rehab treatment this week, which consists of 3 hour classes on Mondays, Tuesdays and Thursdays for 8 weeks. This week, he didn't go on Monday. On Tuesday,...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

For those Arizonans...... 2013 Al-Anon/Alateen Convention in Prescott, AZ enJOY The Journey! http://www.al-anon-az.org/events.htm

cas1206 · cas1206

My husband is an alcoholic and has been getting worse, he blames everything on me and threatens to leave me all the time, no matter how lightly I tread on the egg shells its still not good enough... he's been sick lately, stomach aches and feeling sick after eating, rather than think that maybe somethin...

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

I've been just getting through the days but not fully present. It's been more than three months since my mother died and it's feels as though it only happened a few weeks ago. I think I finally believe it, don't like it but have no choice but to accept it. That panicked feeling has passed now of who am I no...

Green Eyes · Green Eyes

At my Al-Anon home group, we celebrate our Al-Anon "birthdays" at the last meeting of each month and give out tokens to mark the year. Today was my four year birthday in Al-Anon. I am so very blessed to be a member of this wonderful program. The meetings, the literature, the people, this grou...

Pushka · Pushka

Hugs MIP family, It's been a wild week to say the least. The past two weeks have taught me a lot about myself. I did make the decision to help my STBAX out I have had some boundaries and for the most part did an ok job of sticking to them. He did go to one AA meeting. As the saying goes .. nothing changes and n...

tortuga · tortuga

hey everybody, just checking in, you know I need to come here to stick to my program with more discipline....so when I tend to loose it I can come back and re-read how far I've already come at some point, and your words and experiences support me a big deal coming back on track. I feel that acceptance is mor...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Now that I am getting more rest & allowing myself to slow down & relax, I am having more success at getting the JOB done. I have so much to do & feel like I am a bit overwhelmed but today I am allowing myself to rest & basically take the day off. So, I will make this short. I have to get my mind on...

Jozie · Jozie

I Posted this on a page where over 300+ of my Friends are... I Posted it after I lost my Last Friend to Addiction, Please feel free to add your Esh, thoughts, what ever you like... Thanks in Advance for Reading... its A Long one ;) As Always ;) Hope its Ok to Post it here... Thanks Guys :) Yesterday, I had to g...

oldergal · oldergal

My nephew who was a healthy 40 yr old, was taken by the Type A flue, a killer flue that does havoc on your organs. It reminds me how fragile life is...and how much I need to dig deeper into my program and "live" more. Oldergal

Minaret · Minaret

I don't have much time to post as this is at work, but the short story is that I finally got my AH to admit to 9 months of cheating with a woman that he kept denying and lying about. It's a long story that maybe I can tell in more detail later. Even though I knew it was going on, all his denials and making me feel cr...

blondie99 · blondie99

I got my head bitten off a couple hours ago. AH called me from rehab and ripped me for asking his therapist to confirm that we are having a family meeting on Saturday. Said that was a breach of confidentiality and he's the one in treatment so they do what he says, G-D it! Wasn't expecting the call but I'm rea...

abbyalana · abbyalana

A little background...if you need it...My exAH refuses to speak with me. Won't call. Won't text. Nothing, nada, zero, zip. There is no way to even begin to describe how this is considered joint custody or co-parenting. As of right now, due to his addictions and erratic behavior also for safety c...

gemmas · gemmas

Hi all, I am fairly new to the forum but finding it really nice to come in here when I feel stressed and paranoid. My 2 year sober alcoholic boyfriend who is in recovery has lied to me again and I don't know wether to confront him or not. He has cheated on me twice before while he was 1 year sober but was suffer...

John · John

Hi Everyone, My dog, Max, who most know I was taking to the vet several times last week, in a limp, comatose kinda state, and where he stayed a few nights is doing good. He is hypoglucenic and it was causing his sugar (glucose) level to bottom out and take him down to a very dangerous state. I mistakenly...

cinders · cinders

While my kids are the immediate center of my world, I am starting to create more space in my world for me. Its a pretty cool feeling. Yesterday I spent the day with my sister. I painted her soon to be baby's bedroom as I am the painter in the family. We laughed, had lunch and really enjoyed some time tog...

nmike · nmike

Where are the Alanon Promises published? I found them on the Internet but couldn't find the source. Also, there is a quote about not making the situation worse......it is not slogan. Anyone know what I am talking about? Thanks, Nancy -- Edited by nmike on Monday 25th of February 2013 11:29:07 PM

JJ21 · JJ21

I started reading this book and it is like doing a fourth step on your fears and facing denial!! It is a 40 day program with prayer and affirmations daily. It states that we operate from love or fear. Face the fear (hidden anger, resentment, denial or plain fear) and choose to operate from love instead...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

Actually, I could use prayer, meditative thoughts, or whatever way you choose to uplift a friend in need. I am feeling more and more like I need to make a decision about separating or divorcing my AH. He refuses to discuss what HE wants and keeps putting the entire marriage back on my plate, "Wha...

Findinghope · Findinghope

I slipped in my recovery today, and I know that, but I'm not sure if I feel bad about it, Or how bad i feel about it. My AH had another relapse today, after having had nearly a month sober, and I freaked out. I let anxiety, worry and dread take over Before I calmed myself down. Then, and here's the part where I t...

greeneyes · greeneyes

hi there, I'm new to this forum and don't really know where I fit in. All I know is that I'm nearing the end of my rope. My husband is what you might call a 'functioning alcoholic'. He has a well-paying, full-time job, he's extremely intelligent, gets up every morning, goes to work, and rarely goes out. ...

tortuga · tortuga

goodmorning MIP, yes you were so right on about 'i'm right where I'm supposed to be', according to the situation. i accepted that now. Thanks for the support, reading your post feels like solid crutches when I broke my leg only yesterday, and already trying to walk again today, or even running the next...

wornoutmrsfixit · wornoutmrsfixit

I am ready to file for divorce but I am so drained from my job and the emotional toll that I have been through that the thought of the extra work that is going to fall on my shoulders to make the sale of the house happen has me ready to just take my losses and walk away from everything. I have kept going throu...

AStrongerMe · AStrongerMe

Being someone with codepency issues and being in a relationship with someone who doesn't have either addictions or codependency sort of forces me to learn

I caught myself trying to enmesh too far, which caught me off guard because I did so well with detachment in my prior relationship. This rela...

noobie1238 · noobie1238

Hi everyone, I'm completely new to this forum and I guess even Al-Anon. My partner is an alcoholic, but I met her about a year ago, when she was already two years sober and had worked through the steps with her sponsor. In any case, I've found that I'm really uncomfortable when I notice her or her group of...

Tracy · Tracy

Hi All, was on a trip yesterday for work. I got lost and was driving around for quit a bit. In the end I prayed (ha ha ). I pulled over and I was 2 mins from where I needed to be. Wish I would have prayed earlier instead of trying to do it alone. Hugs tracy xxxx

Mirandac · Mirandac

Should i go to a step meeting. I have only been to four f2f meetings. Should i wait to attend step meeting. I have only 3 meetings i can attend weekly step,serenity and regular alanon. Should i just stick to regular meeting for awhile?

Aloha · Aloha

Aloha everyone. Thought I'd pass this along. The WSO has publicized the results of their 2012 membership survey. Take a look if you get a chance. Real interesting stuff in there. From the WSO's Group eNews newsletter: Results from the 2012 Membership Survey are now available! Members' involvement...

Lupo · Lupo

So I have been in and out of this forum reading threads for comfort but until now I have never created an acct. I know that much of what Im going to say is beyond the scope of Al Anon and many of you will probably think Im a fool for putting up with it, but I have been hoping for the best. The relationship that I am...

Jozie · Jozie

Welp...Tonight I have to go lay another Dear Friend to rest at 34... I'm not looking forward to it for he left behind his boy he had raised by himself Since an Infant, and he is but 8yrs old... Seems the Pains of this Disease seem to get me alot here of late, this make (3) in 3 months from addictions, an...

Jen61 · Jen61

I am sure most of you can tell immediately with someone in your family is drinking. It is so interesting to see how their facial features change, their enuciation of words, their body language. I knew immediately he was drinking and so low and behold I found two bottles. I did not throw them away like...

el-cee · el-cee

oh well. what did i expect? x ah is drinking again. no big deal, he is an a. about 6 weeks ago he said sorry for the damage he caused. people said be cautious. well nothing really changed but somewhere in my mind i hoped! oops silly me! i am resentful again. his pathetic self pity and obvious stupidity, its...

lschoenecker · lschoenecker

"Forgiveness - to forgive - is about you and I clearing our resentments of the past. It is about freeing ourselves from the mistakes we have made. Because don't we beat ourselves up sometimes? And this leads to guilt and/or resentment."

rainlax · rainlax

So, I went to my first meeting tonight! I had to walk around the block a few times before going in, but I went! It was... okay. I felt a bit like I didn't fit in. Everyone there who shared was dealing with a loved one who is currently drinking. I'm not, nor have I ever been, in that situation. I don't drink (ne...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

Sometimes things are really true to life! I am experiencing all kinds of coincidences which can make me very crazy. The truth is that I am too aware of my surroundings! I have too many moments that scare me & put me in a definite place of fear. I can only focus on one thing at a time but sometimes I get dis...

Lyne · Lyne

Yesterday my A spouse not only drank yesterday so that her speech was slurred, but she refused to let me drive her home and she drove herself. She's not going to change and she could have killed someone. I MUST accept this. Lyne

DebLisa55 · DebLisa55

My husband was supposed to be in an IOP program from December 2012 to March 2013. Failed a few tests in January. I never knew - obviously he did not tell me but neither did the treatment center. Think I already mentioned that in here. So I called his counselor at the treatment center, and he had all...

Lyne · Lyne

Ok, so this is what I've learned during the past week: Most likely when my A spouse is talking, they will be lies. All the promises she makes she breaks. I have to take care of myself so all her crap is not affecting me. I have promised myself I will no longer ask what time she is coming home, nor check her...

PP · PP

Last week I posted "I want to see my blind spots"..it was really a prayer, so my HP opted the best way to get me to see (or look up) was to put me on my keister. I spent almost a week suffering because I put my well being in the mudpie of earthbound craziness with my arrogance and pride sprinkled o...

Breezie · Breezie

Wanted to share my eleventh step miracle, amazing how Al-Anon works when you work it. It was a very trying past week. AH (sober) and I were not getting along. I tried to talk to him, it did not go well, put me in a tizzy and things even worse between us. I started praying for knowledge of his will and the p...

blondie99 · blondie99

I've decided to make myself useful today, even though the Daytona 500 is on in the background. I am in the process of packing my AH's belongings away - I don't know where they will go, or when, but I feel I need to put them somewhere away from me for the time being. So I'm putting laundry away, including som...

dponlyme · dponlyme

AW drunk tonight and turns into what I call 'the little god'. When drinking she often expects me to do whatever she wants whenever she wants and if I refuse she threatens to make me pay. In the past I would give in just to get her to leave me alone or I would get angry with her which never ended well. Tonight I r...

Jozie · Jozie

Hey All... I'm having another Tough Spot Again at the loss of Yet another to the disease that makes (3) in (3) months, that last two within 2wks of each other... And tho I know my Friend is in a place of Peace, I am So Angry! Not Just at the Disease its self, but at that Narrow Minded, Small Town ~ Small Mind pla...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Car is being repossessed (Preview) I received notice yesterday that my husband's car which is financed in both our names is far enough behind on payments it's being sent to collections for repossession. This car was purchased last year and was supposed to be totally his responsibility to pay for. This is the third car we have financed t...	scaredandconfused	4	331	Mar 4, 2013 by Debilyn
	little more (Preview) The day before I was goofin in Goodwill. This guy was looking and started talking. I made quick answers and moved on. so did he. Later was teasing to put his stuff in my cart. Was a freaking pest, probably thought he was cute. geez. I have gone down 3 sizes now. Wearing a bit of makeup, looks natural, doing...	Debilyn	6	367	Mar 4, 2013 by Temple
	and just like that it changes (Preview) Not sure how to take this latest episode. My son was suppose to clean his room yesterday. My recovering AH realized it was not done to his standard and confronted him. When my son huffed and puffed at him my AH went into a rage...grabbed him and ripped his shirt right off his body. We were gonna go to ch...	1976love	9	531	Mar 4, 2013 by 1976love
	The robin outside my window (Preview) So I was up before the dawn this morning. In my part of the world, spring is slowly starting to come to life. There's no leaves showing on the trees and the grass is still brown, but I see little stirrings happening. The wind is getting a little warmer, the sun is staying up longer. Outside my window, I hea...	blondie99	2	238	Mar 4, 2013 by hotrod
	An acquaintance/member passed away (Preview) Hi Everyone, As I've mentioned in the past, I attend a support group fellowship regularly. This past week I heard the news that a long-time member had passed away. Terry and I had crossed paths a few times. Shaken hands, said hi and had small conversation. I would not say I was particularly close wi...	slogan_jim	6	306	Mar 4, 2013 by pikelpak
	Glad to have found this board (Preview) I came across this board yesterday and have been reading posts and want to share my story. I have been married to my husband for 11 yrs, has always drank, I've known he has had a problem with it for many yrs now and its gotten worse. the last 8 months have been pure hell, a constant roller coaster ride. I have...	hopeful68	2	240	Mar 3, 2013 by hopeful68
	another nice quote (Preview) I love this guy!	el-cee	1	212	Mar 3, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	still shakey and sick (Preview) I am working on so many things. On not hiding myself, dressing more feminine, not being afraid to go out in public. Then next thing i know I am sitting next to a murderer A in a bus. I am one that cannot take much and it tears my guts out. Then I isolate myself. Do my best to keep in light, but inside it churns lik...	Debilyn	1	270	Mar 3, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	Signs from HP (Preview) So my AH has been doing 90 in 90. Currently is on day 82. Last week he needed an annual physical due to his job. He went and got his bloodwork back and I was startled by what they told him. Everything was fine BUT his platelet count was low and the Dr advised him to not drink any alcohol. I never heard of lo...	1976love	3	233	Mar 3, 2013 by slogan_jim
	Leaving (Preview) I have filed for divorce, after 4 years of marriage, from my abusive AH. About a month ago, I realized that I felt I couldn't do this anymore - I stopped trying to fix and change everything, and tried to focus as much as I could on me and on my 2 year old child. I was being drained by my AH's constant irritabi...	KLotus	8	458	Mar 3, 2013 by pinkchip
	trying to stay true to my program (Preview) Hi All: I don't know; am really feeling it tonight like I am being tested or something! I have been going to meetings, f2f and here in the chat room, have been reading daily, the literature and posts here and I thought I was moving to a more positive place....over the past month my AH has told me 5 times he w...	yanksfan51	1	249	Mar 3, 2013 by Jerry F
	Why do I think my son will be different (Preview) It's funny.....I think because my son has been sober for a while and he wanted to make amends and help me why I would think OK....this time it's going to end and be different. He has changed. My son did a computer job last week and made 60 dollars ( one hours work). He then came up and did some yard work f...	Cathyinaz	10	452	Mar 2, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	Today I am grateful (Preview) I am very grateful for the program today, grateful for some great face to face meetings and online meetings this week. Gratefull for a big relief socially that happened this week.	RobinKSC	4	251	Mar 2, 2013 by Debilyn
	Prayers needed please (Preview) Well fellow MIPers, tomorrow is the big day - the one I have been preparing for for the last two weeks. I have all the paperwork ready, I have my letter ready to read and I'm heading to bed now for a good night's sleep before the three hour drive to my AH's rehab facility early tomorrow morning. I cannot than...	blondie99	5	246	Mar 2, 2013 by Debilyn
	Wish big difficulty al-anon courage to change couragetochange decision fear afraid scared unsure doubt doubts doubting need support help (Preview) Some people from the program encourage me to study medicine. I know it is better in the long run. Though I doubt my powers. I was never good at the subjects like chemistry, biology and maths. I am neither used to study a lot. I know everything is possible if I know I can. But it is something so big and unusual...	Bluy0	7	7967	Mar 2, 2013 by hotrod
	Toby Rice Drews Newsletter (Preview) A.)) What is "Getting Them Sober"? -------- "Getting Them Sober'', by Toby Rice Drews, is the million-selling series of books ----- endorsed by 'dear Abby', by Dr. Norman Vincent Peale, and by Melody Beattie (author of ''Codependent No More'', who wrote, '' 'G...	Tracey C	1	4024	Mar 2, 2013 by Temple
	fighting with my own feelings now! (Preview) Well yes, it has to happen I guess. ABF is gone since over a week, and we have no contact at all, so I am back to fighting my own feelings. Whereas i was quite balanced before I met him, much more advanced in my own recovery, I am now a lost mess. Memories of a strong and happy me seems to be just a reminder of bett...	tortuga	8	421	Mar 2, 2013 by bridgetp
	Should I take him to his treatment classes? (Preview) Hello all. I'm new to this board. My husband is an alcoholic and also addicted to Spice, the fake marijuana. He was supposed to start his outpatient rehab treatment this week, which consists of 3 hour classes on Mondays, Tuesdays and Thursdays for 8 weeks. This week, he didn't go on Monday. On Tuesday,...	Clueless Optimist	6	425	Mar 2, 2013 by DavidG
	For the Arizonans (Preview) For those Arizonans...... 2013 Al-Anon/Alateen Convention in Prescott, AZ enJOY The Journey! http://www.al-anon-az.org/events.htm	Cathyinaz	1	252	Mar 2, 2013 by Jerry F
	so tired of being blamed for everything... (Preview) My husband is an alcoholic and has been getting worse, he blames everything on me and threatens to leave me all the time, no matter how lightly I tread on the egg shells its still not good enough... he's been sick lately, stomach aches and feeling sick after eating, rather than think that maybe somethin...	cas1206	11	3036	Mar 2, 2013 by f2fmember
	Now It's Real (Preview) I've been just getting through the days but not fully present. It's been more than three months since my mother died and it's feels as though it only happened a few weeks ago. I think I finally believe it, don't like it but have no choice but to accept it. That panicked feeling has passed now of who am I no...	tiredtonite	7	267	Mar 2, 2013 by tiredtonite
	Four Year Al-Anon Birthday (Preview) At my Al-Anon home group, we celebrate our Al-Anon "birthdays" at the last meeting of each month and give out tokens to mark the year. Today was my four year birthday in Al-Anon. I am so very blessed to be a member of this wonderful program. The meetings, the literature, the people, this grou...	Green Eyes	8	358	Mar 1, 2013 by Hoot Nanny
	Struggling .. and ok .. sort of .. (Preview) Hugs MIP family, It's been a wild week to say the least. The past two weeks have taught me a lot about myself. I did make the decision to help my STBAX out I have had some boundaries and for the most part did an ok job of sticking to them. He did go to one AA meeting. As the saying goes .. nothing changes and n...	Pushka	6	424	Mar 1, 2013 by rehprof
	in the process of ACCEPTANCE & DETACHMENT (Preview) hey everybody, just checking in, you know I need to come here to stick to my program with more discipline....so when I tend to loose it I can come back and re-read how far I've already come at some point, and your words and experiences support me a big deal coming back on track. I feel that acceptance is mor...	tortuga	4	287	Mar 1, 2013 by MDK
	rest makes success! (Preview) Now that I am getting more rest & allowing myself to slow down & relax, I am having more success at getting the JOB done. I have so much to do & feel like I am a bit overwhelmed but today I am allowing myself to rest & basically take the day off. So, I will make this short. I have to get my mind on...	Hoot Nanny	0	174	Mar 1, 2013 by Hoot Nanny
	Reaching out In Recovery.... (Preview) I Posted this on a page where over 300+ of my Friends are... I Posted it after I lost my Last Friend to Addiction, Please feel free to add your Esh, thoughts, what ever you like... Thanks in Advance for Reading... its A Long one ;) As Always ;) Hope its Ok to Post it here... Thanks Guys :) Yesterday, I had to g...	Jozie	1	242	Mar 1, 2013 by hotrod
	Nephew Passed (Preview) My nephew who was a healthy 40 yr old, was taken by the Type A flue, a killer flue that does havoc on your organs. It reminds me how fragile life is...and how much I need to dig deeper into my program and "live" more. Oldergal	oldergal	12	244	Mar 1, 2013 by slogan_jim
	Cheating/Leaving (Preview) I don't have much time to post as this is at work, but the short story is that I finally got my AH to admit to 9 months of cheating with a woman that he kept denying and lying about. It's a long story that maybe I can tell in more detail later. Even though I knew it was going on, all his denials and making me feel cr...	Minaret	10	498	Feb 28, 2013 by bridgetp
	Darkest Before the Dawn (Preview) I got my head bitten off a couple hours ago. AH called me from rehab and ripped me for asking his therapist to confirm that we are having a family meeting on Saturday. Said that was a breach of confidentiality and he's the one in treatment so they do what he says, G-D it! Wasn't expecting the call but I'm rea...	blondie99	6	320	Feb 28, 2013 by Jen61
	How do you respond to great enablers? (Preview) A little background...if you need it...My exAH refuses to speak with me. Won't call. Won't text. Nothing, nada, zero, zip. There is no way to even begin to describe how this is considered joint custody or co-parenting. As of right now, due to his addictions and erratic behavior also for safety c...	abbyalana	2	333	Feb 28, 2013 by Jerry F
	need advice please (Preview) Hi all, I am fairly new to the forum but finding it really nice to come in here when I feel stressed and paranoid. My 2 year sober alcoholic boyfriend who is in recovery has lied to me again and I don't know wether to confront him or not. He has cheated on me twice before while he was 1 year sober but was suffer...	gemmas	7	416	Feb 28, 2013 by RobinKSC
	My dog Max, doing good! (Preview) Hi Everyone, My dog, Max, who most know I was taking to the vet several times last week, in a limp, comatose kinda state, and where he stayed a few nights is doing good. He is hypoglucenic and it was causing his sugar (glucose) level to bottom out and take him down to a very dangerous state. I mistakenly...	John	7	323	Feb 28, 2013 by afglin
	Its about me now (Preview) While my kids are the immediate center of my world, I am starting to create more space in my world for me. Its a pretty cool feeling. Yesterday I spent the day with my sister. I painted her soon to be baby's bedroom as I am the painter in the family. We laughed, had lunch and really enjoyed some time tog...	cinders	10	275	Feb 28, 2013 by tortuga
	Alanon Promises??? (Preview) Where are the Alanon Promises published? I found them on the Internet but couldn't find the source. Also, there is a quote about not making the situation worse......it is not slogan. Anyone know what I am talking about? Thanks, Nancy -- Edited by nmike on Monday 25th of February 2013 11:29:07 PM	nmike	6	304	Feb 28, 2013 by DavidG
	MAY CAUSE MIRACLES (Preview) I started reading this book and it is like doing a fourth step on your fears and facing denial!! It is a 40 day program with prayer and affirmations daily. It states that we operate from love or fear. Face the fear (hidden anger, resentment, denial or plain fear) and choose to operate from love instead...	JJ21	2	193	Feb 28, 2013 by tortuga
	Friends, I could use some prayer (Preview) Actually, I could use prayer, meditative thoughts, or whatever way you choose to uplift a friend in need. I am feeling more and more like I need to make a decision about separating or divorcing my AH. He refuses to discuss what HE wants and keeps putting the entire marriage back on my plate, "Wha...	ilovedogs	9	436	Feb 28, 2013 by tortuga
	Stepping out of bounds (Preview) I slipped in my recovery today, and I know that, but I'm not sure if I feel bad about it, Or how bad i feel about it. My AH had another relapse today, after having had nearly a month sober, and I freaked out. I let anxiety, worry and dread take over Before I calmed myself down. Then, and here's the part where I t...	Findinghope	4	296	Feb 28, 2013 by giraffe13
	Functioning alcoholic husband (Preview) hi there, I'm new to this forum and don't really know where I fit in. All I know is that I'm nearing the end of my rope. My husband is what you might call a 'functioning alcoholic'. He has a well-paying, full-time job, he's extremely intelligent, gets up every morning, goes to work, and rarely goes out. ...	greeneyes	8	606	Feb 28, 2013 by giraffe13
	forgiveness feels more healthy than revenge today. (Preview) goodmorning MIP, yes you were so right on about 'i'm right where I'm supposed to be', according to the situation. i accepted that now. Thanks for the support, reading your post feels like solid crutches when I broke my leg only yesterday, and already trying to walk again today, or even running the next...	tortuga	4	268	Feb 28, 2013 by Breakingfree
	I'm Exhausted (Mentally, Physically & Spiritually) (Preview) I am ready to file for divorce but I am so drained from my job and the emotional toll that I have been through that the thought of the extra work that is going to fall on my shoulders to make the sale of the house happen has me ready to just take my losses and walk away from everything. I have kept going throu...	wornoutmrsfixit	7	351	Feb 28, 2013 by Breakingfree
	growing (Preview) Being someone with codepency issues and being in a relationship with someone who doesn't have either addictions or codependency sort of forces me to learn I caught myself trying to enmesh too far, which caught me off guard because I did so well with detachment in my prior relationship. This rela...	AStrongerMe	3	264	Feb 28, 2013 by Breakingfree
	Discomfort around alcohol / drugs? (Preview) Hi everyone, I'm completely new to this forum and I guess even Al-Anon. My partner is an alcoholic, but I met her about a year ago, when she was already two years sober and had worked through the steps with her sponsor. In any case, I've found that I'm really uncomfortable when I notice her or her group of...	noobie1238	5	418	Feb 28, 2013 by noobie1238
	trusting hp (Preview) Hi All, was on a trip yesterday for work. I got lost and was driving around for quit a bit. In the end I prayed (ha ha ). I pulled over and I was 2 mins from where I needed to be. Wish I would have prayed earlier instead of trying to do it alone. Hugs tracy xxxx	Tracy	2	215	Feb 28, 2013 by f2fmember
	Step meeting? (Preview) Should i go to a step meeting. I have only been to four f2f meetings. Should i wait to attend step meeting. I have only 3 meetings i can attend weekly step,serenity and regular alanon. Should i just stick to regular meeting for awhile?	Mirandac	4	241	Feb 28, 2013 by DavidG
	AFG Membership Survey results are now available (Preview) Aloha everyone. Thought I'd pass this along. The WSO has publicized the results of their 2012 membership survey. Take a look if you get a chance. Real interesting stuff in there. From the WSO's Group eNews newsletter: Results from the 2012 Membership Survey are now available! Members' involvement...	Aloha	2	254	Feb 27, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	My story (Preview) So I have been in and out of this forum reading threads for comfort but until now I have never created an acct. I know that much of what Im going to say is beyond the scope of Al Anon and many of you will probably think Im a fool for putting up with it, but I have been hoping for the best. The relationship that I am...	Lupo	7	417	Feb 27, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	My Friends Spirit Will Sore... (Preview) Welp...Tonight I have to go lay another Dear Friend to rest at 34... I'm not looking forward to it for he left behind his boy he had raised by himself Since an Infant, and he is but 8yrs old... Seems the Pains of this Disease seem to get me alot here of late, this make (3) in 3 months from addictions, an...	Jozie	2	246	Feb 27, 2013 by hotrod
	Hiding, Lying and I am sneaky... (Preview) I am sure most of you can tell immediately with someone in your family is drinking. It is so interesting to see how their facial features change, their enuciation of words, their body language. I knew immediately he was drinking and so low and behold I found two bottles. I did not throw them away like...	Jen61	10	648	Feb 27, 2013 by ilovedogs
	amends meant nothing! (Preview) oh well. what did i expect? x ah is drinking again. no big deal, he is an a. about 6 weeks ago he said sorry for the damage he caused. people said be cautious. well nothing really changed but somewhere in my mind i hoped! oops silly me! i am resentful again. his pathetic self pity and obvious stupidity, its...	el-cee	10	339	Feb 26, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	Monday Night Meeting - Forgiveness (Preview) "Forgiveness - to forgive - is about you and I clearing our resentments of the past. It is about freeing ourselves from the mistakes we have made. Because don't we beat ourselves up sometimes? And this leads to guilt and/or resentment."	lschoenecker	1	150	Feb 26, 2013 by ilovedogs
	Went to my first mtg! Should I go back? (Preview) So, I went to my first meeting tonight! I had to walk around the block a few times before going in, but I went! It was... okay. I felt a bit like I didn't fit in. Everyone there who shared was dealing with a loved one who is currently drinking. I'm not, nor have I ever been, in that situation. I don't drink (ne...	rainlax	9	331	Feb 26, 2013 by rainlax
	true to life! (Preview) Sometimes things are really true to life! I am experiencing all kinds of coincidences which can make me very crazy. The truth is that I am too aware of my surroundings! I have too many moments that scare me & put me in a definite place of fear. I can only focus on one thing at a time but sometimes I get dis...	Hoot Nanny	0	144	Feb 25, 2013 by Hoot Nanny
	i surrender (Preview) Yesterday my A spouse not only drank yesterday so that her speech was slurred, but she refused to let me drive her home and she drove herself. She's not going to change and she could have killed someone. I MUST accept this. Lyne	Lyne	4	257	Feb 26, 2013 by Heather 68
	The trust is gone (Preview) My husband was supposed to be in an IOP program from December 2012 to March 2013. Failed a few tests in January. I never knew - obviously he did not tell me but neither did the treatment center. Think I already mentioned that in here. So I called his counselor at the treatment center, and he had all...	DebLisa55	5	270	Feb 26, 2013 by Heather 68
	life lessons again (Preview) Ok, so this is what I've learned during the past week: Most likely when my A spouse is talking, they will be lies. All the promises she makes she breaks. I have to take care of myself so all her crap is not affecting me. I have promised myself I will no longer ask what time she is coming home, nor check her...	Lyne	3	237	Feb 26, 2013 by Heather 68
	I invoked a prayer when I asked to see my blind spots (Preview) Last week I posted "I want to see my blind spots"..it was really a prayer, so my HP opted the best way to get me to see (or look up) was to put me on my keister. I spent almost a week suffering because I put my well being in the mudpie of earthbound craziness with my arrogance and pride sprinkled o...	PP	5	360	Feb 25, 2013 by f2fmember
	Knowledge of His will.... (Preview) Wanted to share my eleventh step miracle, amazing how Al-Anon works when you work it. It was a very trying past week. AH (sober) and I were not getting along. I tried to talk to him, it did not go well, put me in a tizzy and things even worse between us. I started praying for knowledge of his will and the p...	Breezie	4	239	Feb 25, 2013 by ilovedogs
	Talking to the ashes (Preview) I've decided to make myself useful today, even though the Daytona 500 is on in the background. I am in the process of packing my AH's belongings away - I don't know where they will go, or when, but I feel I need to put them somewhere away from me for the time being. So I'm putting laundry away, including som...	blondie99	7	272	Feb 25, 2013 by Zimmy
	AW drinks and threatens (Preview) AW drunk tonight and turns into what I call 'the little god'. When drinking she often expects me to do whatever she wants whenever she wants and if I refuse she threatens to make me pay. In the past I would give in just to get her to leave me alone or I would get angry with her which never ended well. Tonight I r...	dponlyme	6	343	Feb 25, 2013 by Jozie
	My Anger In Death & Rumors... (Preview) Hey All... I'm having another Tough Spot Again at the loss of Yet another to the disease that makes (3) in (3) months, that last two within 2wks of each other... And tho I know my Friend is in a place of Peace, I am So Angry! Not Just at the Disease its self, but at that Narrow Minded, Small Town ~ Small Mind pla...	Jozie	2	223	Feb 25, 2013 by hotrod
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.