The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
Ok, so this is what I've learned during the past week: Most likely when my A spouse is talking, they will be lies. All the promises she makes she breaks. I have to take care of myself so all her crap is not affecting me. I have promised myself I will no longer ask what time she is coming home, nor check her date book to see if she is lying. I want to be able to call the police the next time she is going to drive drunk. I'm not sure I can do it. Lyne
Glad you are setting some personal boundaries, that is very important. Even more important is enforcing them to protect yourself. Keep coming back!! It does get better
BIG HUGS and great growth, I know it's hard to try and do all of these things. Please be gentle with yourself, you deserve all of your patience. How would you talk to your bff if they came to you with this stuff? That's the kind of self talk you need from you. Be your own bff, and be gentle.
It's slip and slide and that's ok. If you can call the police then you can and if you can't you can't .. you don't have to do anything you aren't ready to do. I'll be honest when my STBAX got his DUI I should have called the police and did not. I was not ready to .. today I think I could, .. I don't know and I hope I don't have to find out. I do feel strongly that I should and to me that is not creating a crisis that is following my own code of ethics.
You don't have to do this perfectly either. No one can, no one is expected to be perfect just do your best. It will get easier as you work through this.
Again .. I know I keep beating the drum .. find a meeting, get a sponsor and work the steps .. you deserve support and you don't have to be so isolated.
Hugs P :)
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Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
I have had to call the police myself too many times. Not for the drunk driving but for the violent outburst of a drunk AB. Even the legal consequences and jail have not help him to see he needs help...but the judicial system had work in your favor. Good luck with what ever decision you make.
