Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

ParisMemories · ParisMemories

Not even 24 hrs ago I posted about my progress. I really felt proud of myself yesterday. Tonight, I am here alone, no idea where AH is. He lied again, I figured out the deception and confronted him this morning, angry and scolding, how can you keep doing this, I screamed. I left for work and havent heard...

PP · PP

I am feeling very heavy hearted today as I consider the path I will be walking with my elderly parents. My father has been in the undiagnosed stages of perhaps dementia/alzheimers and my mom has done what she has always done; denying the obvious and dancing through life, which has served her wonderfu...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Hi everyone I'm in a RUT and I can't get out of it. I can't seem to get motivated to do anything but sit and think. I spent all weekend doing nothing but clean my house and watch TV. No meetings for the last week and very little reading. I'm somewhat depressed and worry is setting in. My eating is gett...

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

I get very conflicted in my head and start wondering why and then WHAM, oh yeah I not only stopped working my program, but I decided I could run the show again. I have veered pretty far of course of who I want to be and act the way I know to act. I am not expecting perfection from myself, but whenever my exAH co...

dponlyme · dponlyme

I have been suffering over the things AW said to me the other day... see the last post I made. I have suffered from depression and anxiety since the 7th grade and when my parents got divorced I took a serious nosedive from an already low place (this when I was in college). I managed to graduate but after gra...

ParisMemories · ParisMemories

AH is having good days and bad days. He is going to a meeting everyday, seeing a new counselor, reconnecting with old (sober) friends, those things are good. He is also still drinking, hardly at all, but I know he is and he knows I know. But the difference today is I feel so much more detached, I love him,...

Pink · Pink

My son is sitting in a bar, on his second pitcher of beer and is recovering from Shoulder surgery and has no driverl license, but rides his bike everywhere. He would not accept a ride from me. The surgical Dr. said no bike riding yet, and if he fall and reinjures his rotator cuff, he will not be able to fix...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Hi Everyone: Thank you again for all the responses to my post from a few days ago...interestingly, since I finally got the courage to give a date for moveout for my AH, have started talking to my family seriously about it and getting support--guess what? The night of my post AH goes out and doesn't come...

NicoleDiver · NicoleDiver

I've been thinking lately about my family dynamics and my AH's family dynamics and one thing rings pretty clear on both sides: everyone sits in judgment of everyone else. There is constant bickering on my side, and constant bickering on his side. And I don't mean between families, I mean within fa...

Renea · Renea

I have a 4 month old baby and my husband smokes weed. He stopped until she was a couple months old and now its everyday again. I have tried to talk to him but it seems not to matter. The problem is apparently he has smoked since high school. I dont want my daughter at risk for something to happen while in his ca...

stephaniej · stephaniej

During my period of unemployment from November-February, I volunteered at my son's daycare so he would be able to continue to attend for free, and we would not have to be in the house with my AH during the day. I spent most of my time in the infant room, where there is a lead teacher and an assistant teache...

dponlyme · dponlyme

AW was already drinking and found out had plans to get more. I didn't exactly stop her but registered my displeasure to step d when I found out she was going to purchase more for her. She gave the money to me my wife had given her and left leaving my wife with w options... walking or not drinking anymore. She...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I have been doing the same things over & over expecting different results: insanity in case you were wondering. I am sane today but tomorrow...I am expecting to be on here soon w/ good news! My sister who I was wondering before if we were estranged is coming to visit for a week starting Weds. I am so ex...

Rinn · Rinn

My husband is and addict. It has contributed to a huge finacial problem. These problems have really affected my family and my extended family. My mom and grandma have been helping us get by, and my mom is now my landlord. Once again I don't have any rent money for her. As much as my AH promises he is goi...

tiredtonite · tiredtonite

I'm going through the first year of grieving my mother who died late last year. Her birthday was last week. Hp brought a snowstorm on that day. Imagine a snowstorm here in mid April not just that day but another after that as well... a fun kind of unpredictability for a change. :) So, I was able to work f...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I need to vent today. Yes, OA is definitely a different program but I personally need it today! We are starting a new meeting in my hometown this evening--it is the first meeting we have had in years. So, I work my alanon program & try to get in touch w/ my horrible weight gain. Yeah, I can do both. I am g...

hotrod · hotrod

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Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I posted on the wrong site again. I guess today I don't need to complain about my relationship w/ & about my mother. I am just frustrated & need to vent! So, quickly I will say that my mom is always at all the meetings. I am so upset that I said something about it in the meeting last night while I was si...

blondie99 · blondie99

Had a really nice and peaceful weekend...was able to spend time with two very good friends - brunch on Saturday morning with my BFF (the wise woman-sister I had mentioned before) and her daughter, who is graduating from high school next month. Saturday night, I had a lovely dinner with a friend from ou...

afglin · afglin

This morning I see a few posts that refer to a mystery board/ I am not familiar with that. Can somebody tell me what it is and how to find it? LIN

BondFan007 · BondFan007

Hi thereMy father has had an alcohol problem since I was young. I'm now 28 and he has just served a 4 month sentence for having 3 DUI's. He had an affair with a woman and caused a divorce that was rough when I was a teenager. He lives at his mother's house with his girlfriend (the one he cheated on). He doe...

1976love · 1976love

So my recovering AH is having a hard time sleeping because of all the household noises. The last two nights he has gone downstairs to sleep because "I" was snoring. Then when he goes downstairs the dog bothers him or he can hear our son's tv on, etc etc. So last night I fell asleep before he...

tortuga · tortuga

I am going through a major time of chanege and awareness. I realize this is avery important period for me, and it doesn't come without some turmoil. It is fear and as some suggested here before, it is a kind of depresion. I experienced depression before, but of a different nature. once before there...

phoenixmagicgirl · phoenixmagicgirl

So I came home from work to find my AM drunk again, I went upstairs for a while came back down to find my AM and dad both at the bottom of the stairs. My AM was on the floor. She said she was coming up the stairs, fell down and twisted her right knee. Mind you she just recently had her right knee replaced a few mont...

hotrod · Newbie

Ms co-dependent Newbie Status: OfflinePosts: 2Date: 4h, 6m ago I came back !ReplyQuoteMore Edit PostDelete PostBan IPReport Spam I came back to find more help and copying skills that I can't get in very little al alon meetings . Wish I had more support availbe to me. I have plenty of al alon books and p...

John · John

phoenixmagicgirl · phoenixmagicgirl

I'm having trouble getting into the chatroom whenever I click on the link that's provided, I get taken to a website, (part of the MIP website??) that has links to the different message boards for AA, Al-Anon, CODA, etc. How do I actually get to the chatroom and log in, this is frustrating. Thanks!

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

I worry so many people are posting and they are going to that other place and they may not be getting heard and the ESH that is so helpful. I know this has been discussed in previous posts, but can we move them all over to here? Thanks.

hotrod · hotrod

http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t53423848/step-2-alanon/

java · java

I've been reading Saved by Grace's postings on dry drunk detachment. I too believe that I live with a dry drunk. He was drinking when I met him and had all the symptoms of drinking alcoholically, had blackouts, got DUI's, drank till drunk, broken blood vessels in the skin around the face, all the classi...

SissySusi · SissySusi

6 weeks ago, my husband and I picked up my sister from a hospital in Indiana (we live in Wisconsin). She has been an alcoholic for at least 8-10 years. She ended up in the hospital because she was near death from cirrhosis, pneumonia, COPD and God knows what else. They managed to save her there and we agre...

Stratosphere · Stratosphere

(Attempting to repost this because I meant to put this on the main board but it seemed to end up somewhere else. Sorry if this just results in a double post--I'm honestly not trying to spam you all, lol!)Hi all,I'm new here. Been trying to figure things out with my boyfriend of 10 months who drinks too m...

Jerry F · Jerry F

When you make it better for you and when you stay completely out of the alcoholic swamp. It was about going into my second year of Al-Anon, or so, that I was told I would have to remove myself from all things alcohol. At first that was confusing because I was so use to being in the middle of it all. Also on...

dponlyme · dponlyme

I've talked to her about her catching the bed on fire and I explained how scary a situation it was for me and I think she understands and is sorry. Just don't know what to do. Boundaries like no smoking while drinking won't be followed when I am not there to police the situation. I can't make her leave... th...

Jen61 · Jen61

We started counseling earlier this week. The counseler suggested a book by Patrick Carnes called A Gentle Path Through The 12 Steps. It is a very interesting book and a lot of food for thought.

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

It has only been a few days since I posted on here but it feels like an eternity sometimes. I really need all of you these days. I have still been struggling w/ my mom being in all the meetings I go to. I started to go to a different 12-step program but I fear she will go to that too. I hope I am not stepping out of b...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Hi Everyone: I haven't posted in a while but have benefitted so much from the ESH on these boards....so first, thank you! I have hit the crossroads w my AH--after 21 yrs of marriage I was able to say with love, compassion and conviction--"I love you but cannot live with the alcohol". We have...

norasq · norasq

I've been struggling over the last few days. About 2 months ago, I separated from my husband of 20 years, and his alcoholism has played a big part in the difficulties in our marriage. Not the only part, but of course a big part. He's not someone that appears to be an alcoholic out in the world, but he's...

ParisMemories · ParisMemories

Yesterday I happened to hear a bit of President Obama's speech at the healing service for the Boston Marathon Bombings. He said, "scripture tells us that God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline." He was speaking about the fear that we have...

LeenieBeanie · LeenieBeanie

Or is it me?? I see half listings from March, then I have to hit Board Refresh twice to get what I hope is the normal site?

sweeetr · sweeetr

Hate is wrong and I know this. but I hate and feel sorry him at the same time. He wants nothing to do with our son who has huge social and behavioral issues aa well as learning issues. If the school calls he freaks at me - he thinks I can't tell he drinks everyday. But the smell and attitude disgust me. I know t...

Martiglg · Martiglg

More advice needed please. I am having a hard time figuring out what to do about my grandchildren (ages 3 & 6) regardng my daughter's drinking. I gave background on the situation in my last thread. I found out she drank last night, so she made it 4 days. How do I follow the steps and still protect t...

1976love · 1976love

So my recovering AH is having a hard time sleeping because of all the household noises. The last two nights he has gone downstairs to sleep because "I" was snoring. Then when he goes downstairs the dog bothers him or he can hear our son's tv on, etc etc. So last night I fell asleep before he came...

Sincerely · Sincerely

Today is 2 years my 19 year old step son was killed. Instead of asking HP "why" I ask him to "help". Ryan was not making right choices. His drug of choice was Xanax and Oxy Cottons. It was clear to me that his life was getting out of control. Death was my greatest fear for him. Ryan...

imom · imom

So ask was driving to work this morning I asked myself the same question I ask myself probably 100 times a day....why am I having such a conflict within myself about trying to get my AH out otour house? Today I think my answer came to me. I think I have been trained and taught for my whole life that family s...

ParisMemories · ParisMemories

Hi friends It has been a few weeks since I've posted, though I've been reading and gaining wisdom and encouragement from all of you on the board. My AH is home now from his second visit to detox in 2 months. He's been home for about a week. His case worker wanted me to insist that he go straight from detox to a...

dponlyme · dponlyme

She went for a 'walk' today to exercise her leg and just happened to walk to the liquor store and was completely s@#@ faced drunk about 30 minutes after returning. I went back to check on her and I thank God that I did because she had passed out and there was smoke coming out from under the blanket. The matt...

Rinn · Rinn

This last week I have had moments of fleeting serinity. lol I am doing good maintaining and something sets me off and I want to be mean and say mean things and pick a fight. I am just so angry. I am not like that at all usually. So I have been stopping to pray, I take break and pray for help in seeing a differn...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

AH wants to talk. He is looking for validation that I see changes in him. While I do notice a few changes, they don't seem real to me and I've been having trouble discerning if it's just me because I don't trust him yet or if it's an internal signal that I should continue to proceed with caution. We got in...

phoenixmagicgirl · phoenixmagicgirl

This weekend went pretty well, albeit I didn't see my AM because I was working all weekend and she was off doing whatever she was doing...Today has been hard mentally and emotionally because I'm so tired of dealing with this....it makes studying harder too. I'm more sad than anything else I just want t...

likemyheart · likemyheart

Aren't they? I mean, before you know how much danger they foretell, red flags are just waving in the wind, fluttering in the breeze, ignored because we are so used to seeing things like that, that we don't really focus on what they are trying to tell us. We don't REALLY understand the warnings because we...

Martiglg · Martiglg

I am the mother of a 30-year old alcoholic daughter. She has 2 children and managed almost 6 years of sobriety then started drinking again about a year ago. I only found out this past Sunday. Apparently she had gone far enough that she confided in several other people in the past week, but didn't te...

Lyne · Lyne

So when or how can I work on detachment? I am on Step 1 and that is great. I don't think there is a step for detachment. At the moment I feel calmer and hopeful, although my sleep is still awful. I'm wanting to feel fine but underneath is a blender churning. I'm not calling my A from work as I used to and...

pinkchip · pinkchip

Is there a bizzaro alanon MIP universe or something? Parallel but equal? Seems like a glitch again.

phoenixmagicgirl · phoenixmagicgirl

Tonight my dad and I went to our first F2F meeting together tonight. We both enjoyed it. I could relate to what the topic was which was living in the moment. Everyone was very nice and friendly...we plan to go back next week.

hotrod · hotrod

Pushka I've been trying to venture into talking to the opposite sex .. lol .. it's been an adventure and a bit of a bumpy ride. I've discovered I have sooo much more work to do on myself as I struggle through the ends and outs of what is "normal" probably a better word is what is "healthy&q...

lnc12 · lnc12

I haven't updated in a while after my last post. AH is in detox right now. We never went to court, as he made the decision to go on his own. The only problem now is that the state rehabilitation facility only takes 5 people per month who can't pay while funds last, and they won't take him unless he proves to th...

Tracy · Tracy

Hi All, just wanted to express that I am just about to start step 8 and I am little upset and hurt with the reality of the way I have treated myself. Thanks to Al anon and Coda I am realising I am a person as important as any other infact I should be the most important person in my life. I have been a care giver fo...

tortuga · tortuga

when you feel lonely but often tend to isolate yourself, when you finally figured out a lot of things in your mind, managed to become honest with yourself, but feel you are doing other people wrong when you want to share but you can't when you want to become active, but you are tired when you know the job yo...

CrazyMother · CrazyMother

This is my first post EVER on any of these forums... I come here often to feel like I'm not the only one in the world living a crazy nightmare. Background: I'm sober 4.5 years, hit my bottom and found recovery. In the rooms of AA, I met my fiance (of course, at 6 months of sobrity...oops, he had 1 yr). Anyway...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	24 hours ago (Preview) Not even 24 hrs ago I posted about my progress. I really felt proud of myself yesterday. Tonight, I am here alone, no idea where AH is. He lied again, I figured out the deception and confronted him this morning, angry and scolding, how can you keep doing this, I screamed. I left for work and havent heard...	ParisMemories	10	517	Apr 25, 2013 by Jerry F
	A heavy heart today (Preview) I am feeling very heavy hearted today as I consider the path I will be walking with my elderly parents. My father has been in the undiagnosed stages of perhaps dementia/alzheimers and my mom has done what she has always done; denying the obvious and dancing through life, which has served her wonderfu...	PP	12	559	Apr 25, 2013 by tiredtonite
	In a Rut (Preview) Hi everyone I'm in a RUT and I can't get out of it. I can't seem to get motivated to do anything but sit and think. I spent all weekend doing nothing but clean my house and watch TV. No meetings for the last week and very little reading. I'm somewhat depressed and worry is setting in. My eating is gett...	Cathyinaz	12	566	Apr 25, 2013 by el-cee
	Slippage, oops I did it again. (Preview) I get very conflicted in my head and start wondering why and then WHAM, oh yeah I not only stopped working my program, but I decided I could run the show again. I have veered pretty far of course of who I want to be and act the way I know to act. I am not expecting perfection from myself, but whenever my exAH co...	Breakingfree	5	574	Apr 24, 2013 by Jozie
	The whole story (Preview) I have been suffering over the things AW said to me the other day... see the last post I made. I have suffered from depression and anxiety since the 7th grade and when my parents got divorced I took a serious nosedive from an already low place (this when I was in college). I managed to graduate but after gra...	dponlyme	10	466	Apr 24, 2013 by PP
	Learning to let go (Preview) AH is having good days and bad days. He is going to a meeting everyday, seeing a new counselor, reconnecting with old (sober) friends, those things are good. He is also still drinking, hardly at all, but I know he is and he knows I know. But the difference today is I feel so much more detached, I love him,...	ParisMemories	6	296	Apr 24, 2013 by Breakingfree
	Son is drunk, mentally and physically disabled. Please advise! (Preview) My son is sitting in a bar, on his second pitcher of beer and is recovering from Shoulder surgery and has no driverl license, but rides his bike everywhere. He would not accept a ride from me. The surgical Dr. said no bike riding yet, and if he fall and reinjures his rotator cuff, he will not be able to fix...	Pink	9	580	Apr 24, 2013 by grateful2be
	and now there's AA (Preview) Hi Everyone: Thank you again for all the responses to my post from a few days ago...interestingly, since I finally got the courage to give a date for moveout for my AH, have started talking to my family seriously about it and getting support--guess what? The night of my post AH goes out and doesn't come...	yanksfan51	9	452	Apr 24, 2013 by ParisMemories
	Family Dynamics (Preview) I've been thinking lately about my family dynamics and my AH's family dynamics and one thing rings pretty clear on both sides: everyone sits in judgment of everyone else. There is constant bickering on my side, and constant bickering on his side. And I don't mean between families, I mean within fa...	NicoleDiver	7	642	Apr 23, 2013 by PP
	Same ole Same ole (Preview) I have a 4 month old baby and my husband smokes weed. He stopped until she was a couple months old and now its everyday again. I have tried to talk to him but it seems not to matter. The problem is apparently he has smoked since high school. I dont want my daughter at risk for something to happen while in his ca...	Renea	4	306	Apr 23, 2013 by ilovedogs
	Very sad weekend; addiction is such a scourge (Preview) During my period of unemployment from November-February, I volunteered at my son's daycare so he would be able to continue to attend for free, and we would not have to be in the house with my AH during the day. I spent most of my time in the infant room, where there is a lead teacher and an assistant teache...	stephaniej	4	340	Apr 23, 2013 by stephaniej
	aw angry: I thwarted her drinking plans (Preview) AW was already drinking and found out had plans to get more. I didn't exactly stop her but registered my displeasure to step d when I found out she was going to purchase more for her. She gave the money to me my wife had given her and left leaving my wife with w options... walking or not drinking anymore. She...	dponlyme	3	392	Apr 23, 2013 by pinkchip
	doing the same thing over & over! (Preview) I have been doing the same things over & over expecting different results: insanity in case you were wondering. I am sane today but tomorrow...I am expecting to be on here soon w/ good news! My sister who I was wondering before if we were estranged is coming to visit for a week starting Weds. I am so ex...	Hoot Nanny	1	386	Apr 23, 2013 by Jerry F
	Outing my AH? Need some imput... (Preview) My husband is and addict. It has contributed to a huge finacial problem. These problems have really affected my family and my extended family. My mom and grandma have been helping us get by, and my mom is now my landlord. Once again I don't have any rent money for her. As much as my AH promises he is goi...	Rinn	10	581	Apr 23, 2013 by Rinn
	Getting there (Preview) I'm going through the first year of grieving my mother who died late last year. Her birthday was last week. Hp brought a snowstorm on that day. Imagine a snowstorm here in mid April not just that day but another after that as well... a fun kind of unpredictability for a change. :) So, I was able to work f...	tiredtonite	10	483	Apr 23, 2013 by tiredtonite
	so maybe you all don't agree... (Preview) I need to vent today. Yes, OA is definitely a different program but I personally need it today! We are starting a new meeting in my hometown this evening--it is the first meeting we have had in years. So, I work my alanon program & try to get in touch w/ my horrible weight gain. Yeah, I can do both. I am g...	Hoot Nanny	2	419	Apr 22, 2013 by DavidG
	peace2me post from the mystery board (Preview) --------------------------------------------------------------------------------	hotrod	0	502	Apr 22, 2013 by hotrod
	if at first you don't succeed! (Preview) I posted on the wrong site again. I guess today I don't need to complain about my relationship w/ & about my mother. I am just frustrated & need to vent! So, quickly I will say that my mom is always at all the meetings. I am so upset that I said something about it in the meeting last night while I was si...	Hoot Nanny	1	307	Apr 22, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	A nice weekend but feelin' a little lonely (Preview) Had a really nice and peaceful weekend...was able to spend time with two very good friends - brunch on Saturday morning with my BFF (the wise woman-sister I had mentioned before) and her daughter, who is graduating from high school next month. Saturday night, I had a lovely dinner with a friend from ou...	blondie99	5	476	Apr 22, 2013 by cinders
	mystery board? (Preview) This morning I see a few posts that refer to a mystery board/ I am not familiar with that. Can somebody tell me what it is and how to find it? LIN	afglin	2	282	Apr 22, 2013 by afglin
	Situation with father... (Preview) Hi thereMy father has had an alcohol problem since I was young. I'm now 28 and he has just served a 4 month sentence for having 3 DUI's. He had an affair with a woman and caused a divorce that was rough when I was a teenager. He lives at his mother's house with his girlfriend (the one he cheated on). He doe...	BondFan007	7	402	Apr 22, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	kinda funny when you think about it. (Preview) So my recovering AH is having a hard time sleeping because of all the household noises. The last two nights he has gone downstairs to sleep because "I" was snoring. Then when he goes downstairs the dog bothers him or he can hear our son's tv on, etc etc. So last night I fell asleep before he...	1976love	3	333	Apr 22, 2013 by Breakingfree
	making amends (Preview) I am going through a major time of chanege and awareness. I realize this is avery important period for me, and it doesn't come without some turmoil. It is fear and as some suggested here before, it is a kind of depresion. I experienced depression before, but of a different nature. once before there...	tortuga	2	385	Apr 22, 2013 by Breakingfree
	More drama with my AM... (Preview) So I came home from work to find my AM drunk again, I went upstairs for a while came back down to find my AM and dad both at the bottom of the stairs. My AM was on the floor. She said she was coming up the stairs, fell down and twisted her right knee. Mind you she just recently had her right knee replaced a few mont...	phoenixmagicgirl	1	279	Apr 22, 2013 by Breakingfree
	Ms CoDependent's post reposted from mystery board (Preview) Ms co-dependent Newbie Status: OfflinePosts: 2Date: 4h, 6m ago I came back !ReplyQuoteMore Edit PostDelete PostBan IPReport Spam I came back to find more help and copying skills that I can't get in very little al alon meetings . Wish I had more support availbe to me. I have plenty of al alon books and p...	hotrod	3	404	Apr 22, 2013 by pinkchip
	Take a break and Smile! (Preview)	John	7	317	Apr 22, 2013 by NicoleDiver
	having trouble getting into chat room.. (Preview) I'm having trouble getting into the chatroom whenever I click on the link that's provided, I get taken to a website, (part of the MIP website??) that has links to the different message boards for AA, Al-Anon, CODA, etc. How do I actually get to the chatroom and log in, this is frustrating. Thanks!	phoenixmagicgirl	0	215	Apr 22, 2013 by phoenixmagicgirl
	lost posts? (Preview) I worry so many people are posting and they are going to that other place and they may not be getting heard and the ESH that is so helpful. I know this has been discussed in previous posts, but can we move them all over to here? Thanks.	Breakingfree	0	236	Apr 22, 2013 by Breakingfree
	Second Step Step Work Board (Preview) http://stepwork.activeboard.com/t53423848/step-2-alanon/	hotrod	0	266	Apr 21, 2013 by hotrod
	Dry drunk syndrome (Preview) I've been reading Saved by Grace's postings on dry drunk detachment. I too believe that I live with a dry drunk. He was drinking when I met him and had all the symptoms of drinking alcoholically, had blackouts, got DUI's, drank till drunk, broken blood vessels in the skin around the face, all the classi...	java	14	15002	Apr 21, 2013 by Ms co-dependent
	Kicked My Sister Out - Dry Drunk Behavior alcoholic sister guilt support (Preview) 6 weeks ago, my husband and I picked up my sister from a hospital in Indiana (we live in Wisconsin). She has been an alcoholic for at least 8-10 years. She ended up in the hospital because she was near death from cirrhosis, pneumonia, COPD and God knows what else. They managed to save her there and we agre...	SissySusi	3	8785	Apr 21, 2013 by SissySusi
	Should I leave BF who is temporarily abstaining? (Preview) (Attempting to repost this because I meant to put this on the main board but it seemed to end up somewhere else. Sorry if this just results in a double post--I'm honestly not trying to spam you all, lol!)Hi all,I'm new here. Been trying to figure things out with my boyfriend of 10 months who drinks too m...	Stratosphere	5	588	Apr 21, 2013 by itsthatkellygirl
	It only gets better... (Preview) When you make it better for you and when you stay completely out of the alcoholic swamp. It was about going into my second year of Al-Anon, or so, that I was told I would have to remove myself from all things alcohol. At first that was confusing because I was so use to being in the middle of it all. Also on...	Jerry F	4	449	Apr 21, 2013 by el-cee
	AW and smoking (Preview) I've talked to her about her catching the bed on fire and I explained how scary a situation it was for me and I think she understands and is sorry. Just don't know what to do. Boundaries like no smoking while drinking won't be followed when I am not there to police the situation. I can't make her leave... th...	dponlyme	6	510	Apr 21, 2013 by KingBoo
	Started reading a new book with my husband (Preview) We started counseling earlier this week. The counseler suggested a book by Patrick Carnes called A Gentle Path Through The 12 Steps. It is a very interesting book and a lot of food for thought.	Jen61	2	405	Apr 21, 2013 by DavidG
	it has only been a few days... (Preview) It has only been a few days since I posted on here but it feels like an eternity sometimes. I really need all of you these days. I have still been struggling w/ my mom being in all the meetings I go to. I started to go to a different 12-step program but I fear she will go to that too. I hope I am not stepping out of b...	Hoot Nanny	1	344	Apr 21, 2013 by MeTwo2
	agreeing to disagree w my AH (Preview) Hi Everyone: I haven't posted in a while but have benefitted so much from the ESH on these boards....so first, thank you! I have hit the crossroads w my AH--after 21 yrs of marriage I was able to say with love, compassion and conviction--"I love you but cannot live with the alcohol". We have...	yanksfan51	11	626	Apr 21, 2013 by Lyne
	Keeping Quiet & Reactions of Family Members (Preview) I've been struggling over the last few days. About 2 months ago, I separated from my husband of 20 years, and his alcoholism has played a big part in the difficulties in our marriage. Not the only part, but of course a big part. He's not someone that appears to be an alcoholic out in the world, but he's...	norasq	6	489	Apr 21, 2013 by norasq
	Fear and Timidity (Preview) Yesterday I happened to hear a bit of President Obama's speech at the healing service for the Boston Marathon Bombings. He said, "scripture tells us that God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline." He was speaking about the fear that we have...	ParisMemories	6	735	Apr 21, 2013 by MeTwo2
	This board still off ??? (Preview) Or is it me?? I see half listings from March, then I have to hit Board Refresh twice to get what I hope is the normal site?	LeenieBeanie	5	357	Apr 21, 2013 by Jill
	I absolutely hate my AH (Preview) Hate is wrong and I know this. but I hate and feel sorry him at the same time. He wants nothing to do with our son who has huge social and behavioral issues aa well as learning issues. If the school calls he freaks at me - he thinks I can't tell he drinks everyday. But the smell and attitude disgust me. I know t...	sweeetr	6	522	Apr 20, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	What do I do about my grandchildren? (Preview) More advice needed please. I am having a hard time figuring out what to do about my grandchildren (ages 3 & 6) regardng my daughter's drinking. I gave background on the situation in my last thread. I found out she drank last night, so she made it 4 days. How do I follow the steps and still protect t...	Martiglg	3	385	Apr 20, 2013 by LeenieBeanie
	kinda funny when you think about it. (Preview) So my recovering AH is having a hard time sleeping because of all the household noises. The last two nights he has gone downstairs to sleep because "I" was snoring. Then when he goes downstairs the dog bothers him or he can hear our son's tv on, etc etc. So last night I fell asleep before he came...	1976love	3	734	Apr 20, 2013 by el-cee
	04/18/2011 Rest In Peace Ryan (my 19 year old step son) (Preview) Today is 2 years my 19 year old step son was killed. Instead of asking HP "why" I ask him to "help". Ryan was not making right choices. His drug of choice was Xanax and Oxy Cottons. It was clear to me that his life was getting out of control. Death was my greatest fear for him. Ryan...	Sincerely	10	540	Apr 19, 2013 by bud
	Conflicted (Preview) So ask was driving to work this morning I asked myself the same question I ask myself probably 100 times a day....why am I having such a conflict within myself about trying to get my AH out otour house? Today I think my answer came to me. I think I have been trained and taught for my whole life that family s...	imom	7	535	Apr 19, 2013 by el-cee
	Checking In (Preview) Hi friends It has been a few weeks since I've posted, though I've been reading and gaining wisdom and encouragement from all of you on the board. My AH is home now from his second visit to detox in 2 months. He's been home for about a week. His case worker wanted me to insist that he go straight from detox to a...	ParisMemories	1	394	Apr 19, 2013 by milkwood
	AW passes out and catches bed on fire!!! (Preview) She went for a 'walk' today to exercise her leg and just happened to walk to the liquor store and was completely s@#@ faced drunk about 30 minutes after returning. I went back to check on her and I thank God that I did because she had passed out and there was smoke coming out from under the blanket. The matt...	dponlyme	17	683	Apr 19, 2013 by milkwood
	The power of prayer... (Preview) This last week I have had moments of fleeting serinity. lol I am doing good maintaining and something sets me off and I want to be mean and say mean things and pick a fight. I am just so angry. I am not like that at all usually. So I have been stopping to pray, I take break and pray for help in seeing a differn...	Rinn	4	330	Apr 19, 2013 by Peggy7
	Could use some positive thoughts my way.... (Preview) AH wants to talk. He is looking for validation that I see changes in him. While I do notice a few changes, they don't seem real to me and I've been having trouble discerning if it's just me because I don't trust him yet or if it's an internal signal that I should continue to proceed with caution. We got in...	ilovedogs	15	685	Apr 19, 2013 by Peggy7
	Having a tough day today... (Preview) This weekend went pretty well, albeit I didn't see my AM because I was working all weekend and she was off doing whatever she was doing...Today has been hard mentally and emotionally because I'm so tired of dealing with this....it makes studying harder too. I'm more sad than anything else I just want t...	phoenixmagicgirl	9	375	Apr 19, 2013 by phoenixmagicgirl
	Red Flags are like Rattlesnakes (Preview) Aren't they? I mean, before you know how much danger they foretell, red flags are just waving in the wind, fluttering in the breeze, ignored because we are so used to seeing things like that, that we don't really focus on what they are trying to tell us. We don't REALLY understand the warnings because we...	likemyheart	5	649	Apr 18, 2013 by el-cee
	New and need tips to deal with other family members...please! (Preview) I am the mother of a 30-year old alcoholic daughter. She has 2 children and managed almost 6 years of sobriety then started drinking again about a year ago. I only found out this past Sunday. Apparently she had gone far enough that she confided in several other people in the past week, but didn't te...	Martiglg	8	461	Apr 18, 2013 by Martiglg
	detachment (Preview) So when or how can I work on detachment? I am on Step 1 and that is great. I don't think there is a step for detachment. At the moment I feel calmer and hopeful, although my sleep is still awful. I'm wanting to feel fine but underneath is a blender churning. I'm not calling my A from work as I used to and...	Lyne	5	415	Apr 18, 2013 by canadianguy
	Why are there like 2 separate boards going on here? (Preview) Is there a bizzaro alanon MIP universe or something? Parallel but equal? Seems like a glitch again.	pinkchip	10	403	Apr 18, 2013 by Breakingfree
	My dad and I went to our first F2F meeting together tonight (Preview) Tonight my dad and I went to our first F2F meeting together tonight. We both enjoyed it. I could relate to what the topic was which was living in the moment. Everyone was very nice and friendly...we plan to go back next week.	phoenixmagicgirl	5	352	Apr 18, 2013 by phoenixmagicgirl
	Pushka's Message Reposted from another Board (Preview) Pushka I've been trying to venture into talking to the opposite sex .. lol .. it's been an adventure and a bit of a bumpy ride. I've discovered I have sooo much more work to do on myself as I struggle through the ends and outs of what is "normal" probably a better word is what is "healthy&q...	hotrod	12	547	Apr 18, 2013 by blondie99
	Detox (Preview) I haven't updated in a while after my last post. AH is in detox right now. We never went to court, as he made the decision to go on his own. The only problem now is that the state rehabilitation facility only takes 5 people per month who can't pay while funds last, and they won't take him unless he proves to th...	lnc12	1	245	Apr 17, 2013 by Sincerely
	relationship with self (Preview) Hi All, just wanted to express that I am just about to start step 8 and I am little upset and hurt with the reality of the way I have treated myself. Thanks to Al anon and Coda I am realising I am a person as important as any other infact I should be the most important person in my life. I have been a care giver fo...	Tracy	1	349	Apr 17, 2013 by DavidG
	do you know that feeling... (Preview) when you feel lonely but often tend to isolate yourself, when you finally figured out a lot of things in your mind, managed to become honest with yourself, but feel you are doing other people wrong when you want to share but you can't when you want to become active, but you are tired when you know the job yo...	tortuga	6	506	Apr 17, 2013 by ilovedogs
	I'm Lost and Alone (Preview) This is my first post EVER on any of these forums... I come here often to feel like I'm not the only one in the world living a crazy nightmare. Background: I'm sober 4.5 years, hit my bottom and found recovery. In the rooms of AA, I met my fiance (of course, at 6 months of sobrity...oops, he had 1 yr). Anyway...	CrazyMother	4	568	Apr 17, 2013 by Tracy
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.