Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

Jerry F · Jerry F

When you make it better for you and when you stay completely out of the alcoholic swamp. It was about going into my second year of Al-Anon, or so, that I was told I would have to remove myself from all things alcohol. At first that was confusing because I was so use to being in the middle of it all. Also on...

dponlyme · dponlyme

I've talked to her about her catching the bed on fire and I explained how scary a situation it was for me and I think she understands and is sorry. Just don't know what to do. Boundaries like no smoking while drinking won't be followed when I am not there to police the situation. I can't make her leave... th...

Jen61 · Jen61

We started counseling earlier this week. The counseler suggested a book by Patrick Carnes called A Gentle Path Through The 12 Steps. It is a very interesting book and a lot of food for thought.

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

It has only been a few days since I posted on here but it feels like an eternity sometimes. I really need all of you these days. I have still been struggling w/ my mom being in all the meetings I go to. I started to go to a different 12-step program but I fear she will go to that too. I hope I am not stepping out of b...

yanksfan51 · yanksfan51

Hi Everyone: I haven't posted in a while but have benefitted so much from the ESH on these boards....so first, thank you! I have hit the crossroads w my AH--after 21 yrs of marriage I was able to say with love, compassion and conviction--"I love you but cannot live with the alcohol". We have...

norasq · norasq

I've been struggling over the last few days. About 2 months ago, I separated from my husband of 20 years, and his alcoholism has played a big part in the difficulties in our marriage. Not the only part, but of course a big part. He's not someone that appears to be an alcoholic out in the world, but he's...

ParisMemories · ParisMemories

Yesterday I happened to hear a bit of President Obama's speech at the healing service for the Boston Marathon Bombings. He said, "scripture tells us that God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline." He was speaking about the fear that we have...

LeenieBeanie · LeenieBeanie

Or is it me?? I see half listings from March, then I have to hit Board Refresh twice to get what I hope is the normal site?

sweeetr · sweeetr

Hate is wrong and I know this. but I hate and feel sorry him at the same time. He wants nothing to do with our son who has huge social and behavioral issues aa well as learning issues. If the school calls he freaks at me - he thinks I can't tell he drinks everyday. But the smell and attitude disgust me. I know t...

Martiglg · Martiglg

More advice needed please. I am having a hard time figuring out what to do about my grandchildren (ages 3 & 6) regardng my daughter's drinking. I gave background on the situation in my last thread. I found out she drank last night, so she made it 4 days. How do I follow the steps and still protect t...

1976love · 1976love

So my recovering AH is having a hard time sleeping because of all the household noises. The last two nights he has gone downstairs to sleep because "I" was snoring. Then when he goes downstairs the dog bothers him or he can hear our son's tv on, etc etc. So last night I fell asleep before he came...

Sincerely · Sincerely

Today is 2 years my 19 year old step son was killed. Instead of asking HP "why" I ask him to "help". Ryan was not making right choices. His drug of choice was Xanax and Oxy Cottons. It was clear to me that his life was getting out of control. Death was my greatest fear for him. Ryan...

imom · imom

So ask was driving to work this morning I asked myself the same question I ask myself probably 100 times a day....why am I having such a conflict within myself about trying to get my AH out otour house? Today I think my answer came to me. I think I have been trained and taught for my whole life that family s...

ParisMemories · ParisMemories

Hi friends It has been a few weeks since I've posted, though I've been reading and gaining wisdom and encouragement from all of you on the board. My AH is home now from his second visit to detox in 2 months. He's been home for about a week. His case worker wanted me to insist that he go straight from detox to a...

dponlyme · dponlyme

She went for a 'walk' today to exercise her leg and just happened to walk to the liquor store and was completely s@#@ faced drunk about 30 minutes after returning. I went back to check on her and I thank God that I did because she had passed out and there was smoke coming out from under the blanket. The matt...

Rinn · Rinn

This last week I have had moments of fleeting serinity. lol I am doing good maintaining and something sets me off and I want to be mean and say mean things and pick a fight. I am just so angry. I am not like that at all usually. So I have been stopping to pray, I take break and pray for help in seeing a differn...

ilovedogs · ilovedogs

AH wants to talk. He is looking for validation that I see changes in him. While I do notice a few changes, they don't seem real to me and I've been having trouble discerning if it's just me because I don't trust him yet or if it's an internal signal that I should continue to proceed with caution. We got in...

phoenixmagicgirl · phoenixmagicgirl

This weekend went pretty well, albeit I didn't see my AM because I was working all weekend and she was off doing whatever she was doing...Today has been hard mentally and emotionally because I'm so tired of dealing with this....it makes studying harder too. I'm more sad than anything else I just want t...

likemyheart · likemyheart

Aren't they? I mean, before you know how much danger they foretell, red flags are just waving in the wind, fluttering in the breeze, ignored because we are so used to seeing things like that, that we don't really focus on what they are trying to tell us. We don't REALLY understand the warnings because we...

Martiglg · Martiglg

I am the mother of a 30-year old alcoholic daughter. She has 2 children and managed almost 6 years of sobriety then started drinking again about a year ago. I only found out this past Sunday. Apparently she had gone far enough that she confided in several other people in the past week, but didn't te...

Lyne · Lyne

So when or how can I work on detachment? I am on Step 1 and that is great. I don't think there is a step for detachment. At the moment I feel calmer and hopeful, although my sleep is still awful. I'm wanting to feel fine but underneath is a blender churning. I'm not calling my A from work as I used to and...

pinkchip · pinkchip

Is there a bizzaro alanon MIP universe or something? Parallel but equal? Seems like a glitch again.

phoenixmagicgirl · phoenixmagicgirl

Tonight my dad and I went to our first F2F meeting together tonight. We both enjoyed it. I could relate to what the topic was which was living in the moment. Everyone was very nice and friendly...we plan to go back next week.

hotrod · hotrod

Pushka I've been trying to venture into talking to the opposite sex .. lol .. it's been an adventure and a bit of a bumpy ride. I've discovered I have sooo much more work to do on myself as I struggle through the ends and outs of what is "normal" probably a better word is what is "healthy&q...

lnc12 · lnc12

I haven't updated in a while after my last post. AH is in detox right now. We never went to court, as he made the decision to go on his own. The only problem now is that the state rehabilitation facility only takes 5 people per month who can't pay while funds last, and they won't take him unless he proves to th...

Tracy · Tracy

Hi All, just wanted to express that I am just about to start step 8 and I am little upset and hurt with the reality of the way I have treated myself. Thanks to Al anon and Coda I am realising I am a person as important as any other infact I should be the most important person in my life. I have been a care giver fo...

tortuga · tortuga

when you feel lonely but often tend to isolate yourself, when you finally figured out a lot of things in your mind, managed to become honest with yourself, but feel you are doing other people wrong when you want to share but you can't when you want to become active, but you are tired when you know the job yo...

CrazyMother · CrazyMother

This is my first post EVER on any of these forums... I come here often to feel like I'm not the only one in the world living a crazy nightmare. Background: I'm sober 4.5 years, hit my bottom and found recovery. In the rooms of AA, I met my fiance (of course, at 6 months of sobrity...oops, he had 1 yr). Anyway...

dponlyme · dponlyme

Realized she was drinking after my adult stepdaughter took her to the grocery store. First thought was "ughh"... but then thought "ok she is drinking... what are you going to do" I decided to look at her and realize the mental pain she is trying to numb and the disease she is suffe...

Loubelou · Loubelou

I live in Uganda, and as far as I know there are no face to face groups in the country, or at least nowhere close enough that I could get to regularly. I come to online groups on and off, but I'm not very committed to my programme. I'm from the UK, where I've only been to 3 or 4 f2f groups when home. Essentially,...

Cathyinaz · Cathyinaz

Good Morning Had a not so good weekend. I picked up my ODAT, reading the days I have missed this last week and pg: 103 says: Depair - how many of us suffer from it. Yet we do not realize that it is purely the absence of faith. We cannot despair as long as we are willing to turn to HP for help in our extremity....

Tyler76 · Tyler76

A good evening to you all. I'm a 37-year-old alcoholic, and I want to stop. I've managed to fly under many radars the last few years by avoiding relationships (friendly, romantic, etc.). I'm able to function most of the time, even at my worst, though I've also invented a "migraine headache"...

Sincerely · Sincerely

Shortly after my Husband returned home from his IOP meeting, he took a deep breath and said, i have to determine 3 ways I am controlling or trying to have control and write a paper about it before my next meeting tomorrow night. I took a deep breath and said, BOO. He said, HOLD ON, i gotta do this, i'm JUST SA...

Rinn · Rinn

I am feeling really hurt and let down and disillusioned. I think part of me hadn't really accepted the idea that I can't change him, I thought deep down he would quit for me, that he loved me enough to do it. I know I felt that way when his addiction first became a par tof our marrige and I struggled when i ask...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

My sponsor has ear trouble, lost some of her hearing & is just over 40. I really feel for her. She went to the doctor today & has been diagnosed. I think that it will ge better---I hope so. It looks like she has a tumor. I hope there is no cancer. She is one of the most special women in my life. I don't kn...

NicoleDiver · NicoleDiver

Just read this on facebook and had to share, hope that's ok: "The problem is not the problem. The problem is your attitude about the problem." - Captain Jack Sparrow He he he......sounds like something I need to hear. Hope everyone's having a happy Monday. :)

PP · PP

Good morning all, I wanted to let you all know I will be gone for a week..am happily travelling to be welcome a new grandson to our family. Tomorrow is his birth day. I will miss participating in this valuable forum and wallowing in the inspiration it provides. Blessings to all.

el-cee · el-cee

I have now been a member of Alanon for 1 year. I am so grateful I found this amazing programme. It has given me back a few things that I lost as a direct result of living with alcoholism, I would like to share with you. 1. My ability to see the truth instead of choosing to live in a world of denial. This denial ke...

John · John

Emotions are a lot like being in water. When your emotions are overwhelming sometimes you feel like you are so helpless to do anything. You drown in the despair, the anger, the sadness, it pulls you under and you lose sight of the sun.You don't have to drown. Sometimes it's enough to just be still, to fl...

beckon11 · beckon11

Hi friends, I have a older sister that can wreck havic with my self esteem. Lucky she lives out of state.While visiting the family.She managed to do it again. Sum me up! Label me! Attack my very being. I have a fatel flaw!I only think about myself! I dont live in the real world/Just a world of emotion...

forestfairy · forestfairy

Just got back home today with my son. Big reunion with our dog. My spouse got a moving truck this morning and moved to a two bedroom apt. about 5 minutes away by car. It took the intervention of friends who helped him find someplace and then helped him move, and just talk sanity to him. We spent weeks in the...

John · John

It was 1998. I had been sober myself for almost 10 years. I called my AA sponsor one morning. My agf was missing in action again. I told him I called all the hospitals, the city and county jails, drove around in the early morning hours, checking her "spots" where she might be, looking for her car, I had...

dponlyme · dponlyme

I want to thank all of you here for making me not feel so all alone. I want to thank you so much for the inspiration and hope for my own recovery which you give. Woke up today feeling just terrible but thanks to reading the posts on here and some prayer I am feeling so much better. One day at a time.

JamesUK · JamesUK

I ask this question because of some of the posts ive read in here from other people who've had problems with their A's since they went into treatment, and my own experience of AA which has ruined my family basically. Since my A started recovery she has changed completely....but not in a nice...

Sincerely · Sincerely

My husband is home from inpatient treatment 6 days now. He's doing IOP & meetings daily. Only thing, I'm worried. He hasn't called his temporary sponsor that was arranged in treatment. He tried once, that's it. should I encourage him to try again? im not sure.

itsthatkellygirl · itsthatkellygirl

So the truth is...I am new here - I am so crowded and so alone. A little me background - In the past I have abused drugs and alcohol, to try to get out of my own head - to try to feel ok - to try to exist. Alcohol was never my thing, my alcoholic husband calls me one drink Lulu, I have ended up with alcohol poisoni...

rainlax · rainlax

My partner (3+ years sober) goes through periods that last about a week where he says he doesn't know what he wants in our relationship... as in, he doesn't know if he wants to be in it. This has happened just twice so far (since last year) and he tends to get over these "phases" just as suddenly...

phoenixmagicgirl · phoenixmagicgirl

Years ago when my AB used to drink and do drugs I was very grateful to be in another state whilst in college. (He's been clean for 4 years now). My AM has been drinking for 2 years and its gotten to hthe point where I'd much rather be anywhere (the gym

Breakingfree · Breakingfree

I am actually not working this Saturday morning so I am trying the new and easier to join 9 am morning MIP meeting and I got right in. Wow this is exciting for me and well I hope people like me who had issues getting in before will try it again. Thanks John for making it better and more accessible. I have the at...

shyrose · shyrose

Hi all, This is my first post here, and I'm curious to hear what you think. I've been in a steady relationship with a sober alcholic for around 9 months. She's got 3 years sober, including from marijuana, painkillers and of course alcohol. I don't drink, have quit smoking, and have given up smoking m...

flopadopilus · flopadopilus

Anyone have some slogans/Al-anon sayings that have stuck or helped them. I am trying to write up a bunch of them and put in a couple handy places to remind me to stay on track. Any and all are welcome.

1976love · 1976love

Last night my husband had to pull an nighter at work. After the kids were asleep I watched Iyanla Vanzant fix my life with rapper DMX. I could see his disease of addiction all over him. The way his eye's would roll when talking, the tears of how everyone hurt him, the anger and no room for love in his soul...

blondie99 · blondie99

Met with my boss today and she and the interview team chose to give the job to someone else rather than to give it to me as a promotion. I expressed that sure, I was disappointed, but the woman who got the job is a former colleague of mine and has been doing the work for the last two years, compared to my less th...

Sincerely · Sincerely

my strength and courage definately comes from my HP but recently, its also come from my aa husband. Before family weekend I've never really been good at speaking in front of a crowd. So fear of speaking at family day at in patient treatment was pretty high. As well as, speaking at a face to face alanon m...

texasgal · texasgal

My A has been going through a whirlwind of mess of his own making. I have pretty much left him alone since he relapsed and continued with my own life. A detective from the police station came looking for him. I just said I didn't know where he was (which is true cuz i never know where he is) and I gave him my A's...

Hoot Nanny · Hoot Nanny

I have posted this before. I guess I tend to repeat myself. I am concerned about the future & the money I might spend. Maybe I need a financial consultant. I am usually pretty wise when it comes to big things but huge things I have a hard time w/. So, now that I got that out of the way, I am doing A-OK. I have...

lorraine · lorraine

im new to this but goin through a lot of s*** that i hope someone out there understands. i met my boyfriend 18 months ago when we were both in treatment for alcohol abuse. i have been sober since but hes not been so lucky. we were just friends to start andhe started to drink and i distanced myself from him the...

Jerry F · Jerry F

for never have making this suggestion. Where the hell was my thinking. For the years I have been on this board and for the years that I have been the literature person in my home group and otheres; for the years that I have sat and listened to the subject of what alcoholism is doing to my marriage and fa...

4kidsmama · 4kidsmama

My AH has been sober for 6 months and things have been 10 times better. Except for one thing. He just will not lay off with the snide and hurtful comments directed at me. My cooking, my cleaning, my driving, my kids, my pets, my job. Whenever he has a bad week at work or isn't feeling good, he reverts b...

John · John

"In homes where relationship trauma or addiction is present, behavior may be inconsistent. The rules that apply one day don't always carry over to the next. The same rules that are laid down on Monday may no longer apply on Tuesday and then suddenly on Friday, Mondays rules may be applied as though t...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	It only gets better... (Preview) When you make it better for you and when you stay completely out of the alcoholic swamp. It was about going into my second year of Al-Anon, or so, that I was told I would have to remove myself from all things alcohol. At first that was confusing because I was so use to being in the middle of it all. Also on...	Jerry F	4	394	Apr 21, 2013 by el-cee
	AW and smoking (Preview) I've talked to her about her catching the bed on fire and I explained how scary a situation it was for me and I think she understands and is sorry. Just don't know what to do. Boundaries like no smoking while drinking won't be followed when I am not there to police the situation. I can't make her leave... th...	dponlyme	6	455	Apr 21, 2013 by KingBoo
	Started reading a new book with my husband (Preview) We started counseling earlier this week. The counseler suggested a book by Patrick Carnes called A Gentle Path Through The 12 Steps. It is a very interesting book and a lot of food for thought.	Jen61	2	350	Apr 21, 2013 by DavidG
	it has only been a few days... (Preview) It has only been a few days since I posted on here but it feels like an eternity sometimes. I really need all of you these days. I have still been struggling w/ my mom being in all the meetings I go to. I started to go to a different 12-step program but I fear she will go to that too. I hope I am not stepping out of b...	Hoot Nanny	1	275	Apr 21, 2013 by MeTwo2
	agreeing to disagree w my AH (Preview) Hi Everyone: I haven't posted in a while but have benefitted so much from the ESH on these boards....so first, thank you! I have hit the crossroads w my AH--after 21 yrs of marriage I was able to say with love, compassion and conviction--"I love you but cannot live with the alcohol". We have...	yanksfan51	11	571	Apr 21, 2013 by Lyne
	Keeping Quiet & Reactions of Family Members (Preview) I've been struggling over the last few days. About 2 months ago, I separated from my husband of 20 years, and his alcoholism has played a big part in the difficulties in our marriage. Not the only part, but of course a big part. He's not someone that appears to be an alcoholic out in the world, but he's...	norasq	6	434	Apr 21, 2013 by norasq
	Fear and Timidity (Preview) Yesterday I happened to hear a bit of President Obama's speech at the healing service for the Boston Marathon Bombings. He said, "scripture tells us that God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline." He was speaking about the fear that we have...	ParisMemories	6	683	Apr 21, 2013 by MeTwo2
	This board still off ??? (Preview) Or is it me?? I see half listings from March, then I have to hit Board Refresh twice to get what I hope is the normal site?	LeenieBeanie	5	300	Apr 21, 2013 by Jill
	I absolutely hate my AH (Preview) Hate is wrong and I know this. but I hate and feel sorry him at the same time. He wants nothing to do with our son who has huge social and behavioral issues aa well as learning issues. If the school calls he freaks at me - he thinks I can't tell he drinks everyday. But the smell and attitude disgust me. I know t...	sweeetr	6	466	Apr 20, 2013 by Cathyinaz
	What do I do about my grandchildren? (Preview) More advice needed please. I am having a hard time figuring out what to do about my grandchildren (ages 3 & 6) regardng my daughter's drinking. I gave background on the situation in my last thread. I found out she drank last night, so she made it 4 days. How do I follow the steps and still protect t...	Martiglg	3	328	Apr 20, 2013 by LeenieBeanie
	kinda funny when you think about it. (Preview) So my recovering AH is having a hard time sleeping because of all the household noises. The last two nights he has gone downstairs to sleep because "I" was snoring. Then when he goes downstairs the dog bothers him or he can hear our son's tv on, etc etc. So last night I fell asleep before he came...	1976love	3	588	Apr 20, 2013 by el-cee
	04/18/2011 Rest In Peace Ryan (my 19 year old step son) (Preview) Today is 2 years my 19 year old step son was killed. Instead of asking HP "why" I ask him to "help". Ryan was not making right choices. His drug of choice was Xanax and Oxy Cottons. It was clear to me that his life was getting out of control. Death was my greatest fear for him. Ryan...	Sincerely	10	485	Apr 19, 2013 by bud
	Conflicted (Preview) So ask was driving to work this morning I asked myself the same question I ask myself probably 100 times a day....why am I having such a conflict within myself about trying to get my AH out otour house? Today I think my answer came to me. I think I have been trained and taught for my whole life that family s...	imom	7	479	Apr 19, 2013 by el-cee
	Checking In (Preview) Hi friends It has been a few weeks since I've posted, though I've been reading and gaining wisdom and encouragement from all of you on the board. My AH is home now from his second visit to detox in 2 months. He's been home for about a week. His case worker wanted me to insist that he go straight from detox to a...	ParisMemories	1	339	Apr 19, 2013 by milkwood
	AW passes out and catches bed on fire!!! (Preview) She went for a 'walk' today to exercise her leg and just happened to walk to the liquor store and was completely s@#@ faced drunk about 30 minutes after returning. I went back to check on her and I thank God that I did because she had passed out and there was smoke coming out from under the blanket. The matt...	dponlyme	17	626	Apr 19, 2013 by milkwood
	The power of prayer... (Preview) This last week I have had moments of fleeting serinity. lol I am doing good maintaining and something sets me off and I want to be mean and say mean things and pick a fight. I am just so angry. I am not like that at all usually. So I have been stopping to pray, I take break and pray for help in seeing a differn...	Rinn	4	277	Apr 19, 2013 by Peggy7
	Could use some positive thoughts my way.... (Preview) AH wants to talk. He is looking for validation that I see changes in him. While I do notice a few changes, they don't seem real to me and I've been having trouble discerning if it's just me because I don't trust him yet or if it's an internal signal that I should continue to proceed with caution. We got in...	ilovedogs	15	633	Apr 19, 2013 by Peggy7
	Having a tough day today... (Preview) This weekend went pretty well, albeit I didn't see my AM because I was working all weekend and she was off doing whatever she was doing...Today has been hard mentally and emotionally because I'm so tired of dealing with this....it makes studying harder too. I'm more sad than anything else I just want t...	phoenixmagicgirl	9	321	Apr 19, 2013 by phoenixmagicgirl
	Red Flags are like Rattlesnakes (Preview) Aren't they? I mean, before you know how much danger they foretell, red flags are just waving in the wind, fluttering in the breeze, ignored because we are so used to seeing things like that, that we don't really focus on what they are trying to tell us. We don't REALLY understand the warnings because we...	likemyheart	5	582	Apr 18, 2013 by el-cee
	New and need tips to deal with other family members...please! (Preview) I am the mother of a 30-year old alcoholic daughter. She has 2 children and managed almost 6 years of sobriety then started drinking again about a year ago. I only found out this past Sunday. Apparently she had gone far enough that she confided in several other people in the past week, but didn't te...	Martiglg	8	407	Apr 18, 2013 by Martiglg
	detachment (Preview) So when or how can I work on detachment? I am on Step 1 and that is great. I don't think there is a step for detachment. At the moment I feel calmer and hopeful, although my sleep is still awful. I'm wanting to feel fine but underneath is a blender churning. I'm not calling my A from work as I used to and...	Lyne	5	362	Apr 18, 2013 by canadianguy
	Why are there like 2 separate boards going on here? (Preview) Is there a bizzaro alanon MIP universe or something? Parallel but equal? Seems like a glitch again.	pinkchip	10	353	Apr 18, 2013 by Breakingfree
	My dad and I went to our first F2F meeting together tonight (Preview) Tonight my dad and I went to our first F2F meeting together tonight. We both enjoyed it. I could relate to what the topic was which was living in the moment. Everyone was very nice and friendly...we plan to go back next week.	phoenixmagicgirl	5	302	Apr 18, 2013 by phoenixmagicgirl
	Pushka's Message Reposted from another Board (Preview) Pushka I've been trying to venture into talking to the opposite sex .. lol .. it's been an adventure and a bit of a bumpy ride. I've discovered I have sooo much more work to do on myself as I struggle through the ends and outs of what is "normal" probably a better word is what is "healthy&q...	hotrod	12	497	Apr 18, 2013 by blondie99
	Detox (Preview) I haven't updated in a while after my last post. AH is in detox right now. We never went to court, as he made the decision to go on his own. The only problem now is that the state rehabilitation facility only takes 5 people per month who can't pay while funds last, and they won't take him unless he proves to th...	lnc12	1	190	Apr 17, 2013 by Sincerely
	relationship with self (Preview) Hi All, just wanted to express that I am just about to start step 8 and I am little upset and hurt with the reality of the way I have treated myself. Thanks to Al anon and Coda I am realising I am a person as important as any other infact I should be the most important person in my life. I have been a care giver fo...	Tracy	1	293	Apr 17, 2013 by DavidG
	do you know that feeling... (Preview) when you feel lonely but often tend to isolate yourself, when you finally figured out a lot of things in your mind, managed to become honest with yourself, but feel you are doing other people wrong when you want to share but you can't when you want to become active, but you are tired when you know the job yo...	tortuga	6	444	Apr 17, 2013 by ilovedogs
	I'm Lost and Alone (Preview) This is my first post EVER on any of these forums... I come here often to feel like I'm not the only one in the world living a crazy nightmare. Background: I'm sober 4.5 years, hit my bottom and found recovery. In the rooms of AA, I met my fiance (of course, at 6 months of sobrity...oops, he had 1 yr). Anyway...	CrazyMother	4	515	Apr 17, 2013 by Tracy
	AW drinks last night (Preview) Realized she was drinking after my adult stepdaughter took her to the grocery store. First thought was "ughh"... but then thought "ok she is drinking... what are you going to do" I decided to look at her and realize the mental pain she is trying to numb and the disease she is suffe...	dponlyme	8	323	Apr 17, 2013 by pinkchip
	Support needed to start a group (Preview) I live in Uganda, and as far as I know there are no face to face groups in the country, or at least nowhere close enough that I could get to regularly. I come to online groups on and off, but I'm not very committed to my programme. I'm from the UK, where I've only been to 3 or 4 f2f groups when home. Essentially,...	Loubelou	5	602	Apr 17, 2013 by Jerry F
	It doesn't take much to lose your way (Preview) Good Morning Had a not so good weekend. I picked up my ODAT, reading the days I have missed this last week and pg: 103 says: Depair - how many of us suffer from it. Yet we do not realize that it is purely the absence of faith. We cannot despair as long as we are willing to turn to HP for help in our extremity....	Cathyinaz	10	590	Apr 16, 2013 by dponlyme
	A friendly hello (Preview) A good evening to you all. I'm a 37-year-old alcoholic, and I want to stop. I've managed to fly under many radars the last few years by avoiding relationships (friendly, romantic, etc.). I'm able to function most of the time, even at my worst, though I've also invented a "migraine headache"...	Tyler76	8	417	Apr 16, 2013 by hotrod
	Follow up to My Hubby and His Sponsor (his busines, i know, kinda) (Preview) Shortly after my Husband returned home from his IOP meeting, he took a deep breath and said, i have to determine 3 ways I am controlling or trying to have control and write a paper about it before my next meeting tomorrow night. I took a deep breath and said, BOO. He said, HOLD ON, i gotta do this, i'm JUST SA...	Sincerely	2	284	Apr 16, 2013 by NicoleDiver
	I really thought I could change him.... (Preview) I am feeling really hurt and let down and disillusioned. I think part of me hadn't really accepted the idea that I can't change him, I thought deep down he would quit for me, that he loved me enough to do it. I know I felt that way when his addiction first became a par tof our marrige and I struggled when i ask...	Rinn	14	493	Apr 16, 2013 by debhud
	my sponsor has ear trouble(prayers needed) (Preview) My sponsor has ear trouble, lost some of her hearing & is just over 40. I really feel for her. She went to the doctor today & has been diagnosed. I think that it will ge better---I hope so. It looks like she has a tumor. I hope there is no cancer. She is one of the most special women in my life. I don't kn...	Hoot Nanny	2	271	Apr 16, 2013 by ilovedogs
	Captain Jack Sparrow quote: (Preview) Just read this on facebook and had to share, hope that's ok: "The problem is not the problem. The problem is your attitude about the problem." - Captain Jack Sparrow He he he......sounds like something I need to hear. Hope everyone's having a happy Monday. :)	NicoleDiver	5	2943	Apr 16, 2013 by Peggy7
	Will be Gone for a Week (Preview) Good morning all, I wanted to let you all know I will be gone for a week..am happily travelling to be welcome a new grandson to our family. Tomorrow is his birth day. I will miss participating in this valuable forum and wallowing in the inspiration it provides. Blessings to all.	PP	13	349	Apr 16, 2013 by tortuga
	1 year down the line (Preview) I have now been a member of Alanon for 1 year. I am so grateful I found this amazing programme. It has given me back a few things that I lost as a direct result of living with alcoholism, I would like to share with you. 1. My ability to see the truth instead of choosing to live in a world of denial. This denial ke...	el-cee	16	450	Apr 15, 2013 by el-cee
	Emotional Self Care.... (Preview) Emotions are a lot like being in water. When your emotions are overwhelming sometimes you feel like you are so helpless to do anything. You drown in the despair, the anger, the sadness, it pulls you under and you lose sight of the sun.You don't have to drown. Sometimes it's enough to just be still, to fl...	John	5	397	Apr 15, 2013 by milkwood
	my sister delivers more creul emotional attacks!! (Preview) Hi friends, I have a older sister that can wreck havic with my self esteem. Lucky she lives out of state.While visiting the family.She managed to do it again. Sum me up! Label me! Attack my very being. I have a fatel flaw!I only think about myself! I dont live in the real world/Just a world of emotion...	beckon11	5	452	Apr 15, 2013 by Sincerely
	home again (Preview) Just got back home today with my son. Big reunion with our dog. My spouse got a moving truck this morning and moved to a two bedroom apt. about 5 minutes away by car. It took the intervention of friends who helped him find someplace and then helped him move, and just talk sanity to him. We spent weeks in the...	forestfairy	8	457	Apr 15, 2013 by forestfairy
	Just remembering.... (Preview) It was 1998. I had been sober myself for almost 10 years. I called my AA sponsor one morning. My agf was missing in action again. I told him I called all the hospitals, the city and county jails, drove around in the early morning hours, checking her "spots" where she might be, looking for her car, I had...	John	9	455	Apr 15, 2013 by milkwood
	Thank you all for being here with me (Preview) I want to thank all of you here for making me not feel so all alone. I want to thank you so much for the inspiration and hope for my own recovery which you give. Woke up today feeling just terrible but thanks to reading the posts on here and some prayer I am feeling so much better. One day at a time.	dponlyme	4	287	Apr 15, 2013 by milkwood
	Is AA worth really worth all the hassle?..it has destroyed my family as i knew it. (Preview) I ask this question because of some of the posts ive read in here from other people who've had problems with their A's since they went into treatment, and my own experience of AA which has ruined my family basically. Since my A started recovery she has changed completely....but not in a nice...	JamesUK	26	7940	Apr 15, 2013 by bryan
	My AA Hubby & his sponsor (his business, I know, well sorta) (Preview) My husband is home from inpatient treatment 6 days now. He's doing IOP & meetings daily. Only thing, I'm worried. He hasn't called his temporary sponsor that was arranged in treatment. He tried once, that's it. should I encourage him to try again? im not sure.	Sincerely	3	285	Apr 15, 2013 by PP
	Crowded and Alone (Preview) So the truth is...I am new here - I am so crowded and so alone. A little me background - In the past I have abused drugs and alcohol, to try to get out of my own head - to try to feel ok - to try to exist. Alcohol was never my thing, my alcoholic husband calls me one drink Lulu, I have ended up with alcohol poisoni...	itsthatkellygirl	4	441	Apr 15, 2013 by PP
	How to handle A's feelings? (Preview) My partner (3+ years sober) goes through periods that last about a week where he says he doesn't know what he wants in our relationship... as in, he doesn't know if he wants to be in it. This has happened just twice so far (since last year) and he tends to get over these "phases" just as suddenly...	rainlax	3	294	Apr 15, 2013 by tiredtonite
	Is it strange to do this? (Preview) Years ago when my AB used to drink and do drugs I was very grateful to be in another state whilst in college. (He's been clean for 4 years now). My AM has been drinking for 2 years and its gotten to hthe point where I'd much rather be anywhere (the gym	phoenixmagicgirl	7	273	Apr 15, 2013 by phoenixmagicgirl
	Meeting this morning (MIP style) my first one (Preview) I am actually not working this Saturday morning so I am trying the new and easier to join 9 am morning MIP meeting and I got right in. Wow this is exciting for me and well I hope people like me who had issues getting in before will try it again. Thanks John for making it better and more accessible. I have the at...	Breakingfree	3	217	Apr 15, 2013 by Breakingfree
	chronic pain, medical marijuana and confusion (Preview) Hi all, This is my first post here, and I'm curious to hear what you think. I've been in a steady relationship with a sober alcholic for around 9 months. She's got 3 years sober, including from marijuana, painkillers and of course alcohol. I don't drink, have quit smoking, and have given up smoking m...	shyrose	3	383	Apr 15, 2013 by shyrose
	Slogans and sayings- need some (Preview) Anyone have some slogans/Al-anon sayings that have stuck or helped them. I am trying to write up a bunch of them and put in a couple handy places to remind me to stay on track. Any and all are welcome.	flopadopilus	14	8936	Apr 14, 2013 by John
	what a show. (Preview) Last night my husband had to pull an nighter at work. After the kids were asleep I watched Iyanla Vanzant fix my life with rapper DMX. I could see his disease of addiction all over him. The way his eye's would roll when talking, the tears of how everyone hurt him, the anger and no room for love in his soul...	1976love	3	329	Apr 14, 2013 by Jerry F
	Ugh...didn't get the promotion :( (Preview) Met with my boss today and she and the interview team chose to give the job to someone else rather than to give it to me as a promotion. I expressed that sure, I was disappointed, but the woman who got the job is a former colleague of mine and has been doing the work for the last two years, compared to my less th...	blondie99	5	280	Apr 14, 2013 by likemyheart
	Strength & Courage (Preview) my strength and courage definately comes from my HP but recently, its also come from my aa husband. Before family weekend I've never really been good at speaking in front of a crowd. So fear of speaking at family day at in patient treatment was pretty high. As well as, speaking at a face to face alanon m...	Sincerely	4	236	Apr 14, 2013 by ilovedogs
	making the right decision for me (Preview) My A has been going through a whirlwind of mess of his own making. I have pretty much left him alone since he relapsed and continued with my own life. A detective from the police station came looking for him. I just said I didn't know where he was (which is true cuz i never know where he is) and I gave him my A's...	texasgal	10	382	Apr 14, 2013 by pinkchip
	where do I go from here(Part Two) (Preview) I have posted this before. I guess I tend to repeat myself. I am concerned about the future & the money I might spend. Maybe I need a financial consultant. I am usually pretty wise when it comes to big things but huge things I have a hard time w/. So, now that I got that out of the way, I am doing A-OK. I have...	Hoot Nanny	3	272	Apr 14, 2013 by tiredtonite
	hes at it again and i need to walk away (Preview) im new to this but goin through a lot of s*** that i hope someone out there understands. i met my boyfriend 18 months ago when we were both in treatment for alcohol abuse. i have been sober since but hes not been so lucky. we were just friends to start andhe started to drink and i distanced myself from him the...	lorraine	7	534	Apr 14, 2013 by John
	I apologize (Preview) for never have making this suggestion. Where the hell was my thinking. For the years I have been on this board and for the years that I have been the literature person in my home group and otheres; for the years that I have sat and listened to the subject of what alcoholism is doing to my marriage and fa...	Jerry F	6	379	Apr 14, 2013 by el-cee
	Is he a alcoholic or just an 'xxxx'? (Preview) My AH has been sober for 6 months and things have been 10 times better. Except for one thing. He just will not lay off with the snide and hurtful comments directed at me. My cooking, my cleaning, my driving, my kids, my pets, my job. Whenever he has a bad week at work or isn't feeling good, he reverts b...	4kidsmama	12	2197	Apr 14, 2013 by John
	Emotional Sobriety (Preview) "In homes where relationship trauma or addiction is present, behavior may be inconsistent. The rules that apply one day don't always carry over to the next. The same rules that are laid down on Monday may no longer apply on Tuesday and then suddenly on Friday, Mondays rules may be applied as though t...	John	9	4240	Apr 14, 2013 by forestfairy
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.