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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> my sister delivers more creul emotional attacks!!
Post Info TOPIC: my sister delivers more creul emotional attacks!!
Breakingfree


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my sister delivers more creul emotional attacks!!
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My older brother who lives in another State does the same thing to me when I go back home to visit. I have learned he is stunted, angry and likes to tear me down. I have learned not to let him get to me by dettaching and keeping our face time to a minimum. We grew up in dysfunction and well when I do visit my family of origin I go prepared for the behaviors of old and I set boundaries and stick to them. Have you read "Getting Them Sober" by Toby Rice Drews? They apply to anyone who behaves like addicts/alcoholics and has helped me to handle myself around them in a healthier way. I attend more meetings when I have drama going on in my life as well to better be ready with tools rather than old default behaviors that didn't help back then and still don't now. Sending you much love and support!



-- Edited by Breakingfree on Sunday 14th of April 2013 09:55:16 PM

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Sending you love and support on your journey always! BreakingFree

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" Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional."

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beckon11


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nono     Hi friends,

I have a older sister that can wreck havic with my self esteem.

Lucky she lives out of state.While visiting the family.She managed to do it again.

Sum me up! Label me! Attack my very being. I have a fatel flaw!I only think

about myself!

 I dont live in the real

world/Just a world of emotion. I am very hurt,and angry that this never stops.

Saddest of all/she has me questioning my own reality.

Hopeing to hear from you,about simular experiences.

Thx Beckon11

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



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beckon11usa
hotrod


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Hi Beckon
 
I am sorry that you are upset and so very glad that you shared. In a family affected by the disease of alcoholism everyone needs a program of recovery.. In order for you to be able to detach from her comments , validate who you are and what you believe, and understand that you are a valuable human being it is important to break the isolation caused by this disease and seek out a program of recovery.
 
Alanon is such a program/ Alanon has face to face meetings held in most communities . You can find one by going to the following link:

http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/meetings/meeting.html

And placing your cursor over about us in the upper left of the screen, 3 more pull downs open. One of these are information for the newcomer, and the second is Al-Anon for you; both have good information.

Please keep coming back



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Betty

THE HIGHEST FORM OF WISDOM IS KINDNESS

Talmud
NicoleDiver


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Beckon, whenever I am about to criticize somebody, I try to stop and think, "Now, what part of this do I see in myself?" Because I learned a long time ago, that people criticize in others what they actually are themselves. Kind of like that saying we hear as kids: "It takes one to know one." I never understood that phrase until a few years ago. So, no matter what your sister says about you, she probably feels that way about herself. Hope this helps a little, because it always helps me some.

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milkwood


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Hi Beckon, I'm with Nicole on this - in my experience when people say vicious things it says more about them than it does about anyone else. I think it can sometimes be called projection. When AH was doing this to me and I thought that I was loosing my mind I phoned three friends and asked their opinion about whether I was going off the rails - boy did we all have a good, and very loving, laugh about that one.

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Sincerely


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Family or Friends who bring me down, I just have to detach.
It's not always easy, but it always feels better emotionally.


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With love in recovery, 

Sincerely
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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> my sister delivers more creul emotional attacks!!