Al-Anon Family Group - Al-Anon Family Group

hersh · hersh

(((Good morning everyone))) From snowy Colorado. It is pretty. I just wanted to see if anyone had some ESH on the Alcoholic playing the victim, or if that is what this is.... I have been going out almost every night, to an Alanon or AA meeting, because I HAVE to for my sanity. I do...

gardengal · gardengal

For years,,,when the insanity of my husbands drinking was progressing, I wanted friends and family to feel sorry for me. Oh woe is me! Sitting on the pity pot waiting for something good to happen. Somebody do something,,somebody stop all of this, somebody help me,,,,,etc,,,etc. Even when I started...

arty · arty

I went away with my a this past weekend to a beach house. just the two of us. He knows when we do things like that there is no point in him drinking, coz if he does there is no point in us having a romantic weekend. And it was beautiful. He used to drink all the time, thinking it was his only enjoyment. These...

maresie2 · maresie2

Well it looks like my plans for the holidays are on hold. I am not working enough to take time off so I will probably be working at the hotel. That will give me some respite. I will go out on the evening of New Years Eve to not have to deal with the fireworks. The bangs and the bombs and what...

greta · greta

An old Arab, whose tent was pitched next to a company of whirling dervishes was asked, "Don't they bother you?" "No!" was his answer. "What do you do about them?" "I let them whirl." Wouldn't that be easier? Instead of trying to control a whirlwind? Probably any one of us can get along with pe...

Becky1 · Becky1

In Jan. of 2004, my drunk AH and I were in our home, he became belligerant, and gesturing his arms around wildly, and hit me in the nose. What followed is greater than my greatest nightmare ever was. I already have PTSSD, so everything was magnified. I wtnt o his mother's who took m...

kismetstrand · kismetstrand

Hey (((((((((Josey)))))))))) Happy Birthday! Hope you have a wonderful wonderful day!! Luv ya!! Kis

sparkette · sparkette

Today is another new day. For a really long time I was focused on new beginnings needing to be some grand large change or shift. I am in the middle of a divorce right now and my daughters and I moved into our new apt on Wednesday. That is a big change, a big shift. What occurs to me that through these past few mo...

twinkie · twinkie

I don't understand all the lies - why? Not lies to cover up drinking - he is not actively drinking right now - but lies about so many other things - whether he is going to AA meetings, if he called - we started out the relationship with deceit - he told me so many things which were untrue - broke the trus...

Noni · Noni

Is there a way already, or would it be possible, to include a feature on the board where any user can see only the posts that they have posted (authored or posted within)? Thanks.

Becky1 · Becky1

Just got home from walmart. Poor me! (I LOVE Walmart!) Hubby is in his usual place, across the street, helping decorate for a Halloween party tomorrow night. His friends. I'm going to my friends party while he goes to his. This is different for us, we usually go together w...

twinkie · twinkie

I have to bite my tongue and need some detachment. My A just had a major relapse a few months ago - he went on a 12 day binge - his mother rescued him, took him to the hospital, cleaned up his apartment, etc etc. (enabler!) I moved out. As a result of his relapse his son's mother filed a cus...

laurab · laurab

I haven't spoken to my son in over 24 hours. I don't know where he is, if he still has his job, or if he is sober today. I know the 3 Cs. I know that if I call him and all I hear is terrible stuff, I will be miserable all night. I know what I have to do for myself, meetings, detach etc. But all I want is to know that he is...

hersh · hersh

((((Happy Friday))) Everyone... Thought I would share a gratitude list - a lady at a meeting the other night said that she recited one in her head from A-Z so she could sleep at night... what a great idea! I did it last night and it actually worked. A- Alanon and AA B - Birds, breathing C - Co...

purplebutterfly · purplebutterfly

I went to the mall with my daughter today . My dry A got mad I spent money on as my A says " junk". I bought her a necklace a pencil holder that had 4 things in it. and 2 lip glossess. We had a nice time together. Im having trouble letting go of guilt i dont deserve. Then my dry A says when home then im g...

Becky1 · Becky1

I posted earlier about how my husband burned his camo sweatshirt jacket that I had worn. I used to always try to be nice about things, and try to smooth things over with him, but ever since I went off my antidepressants, I have just cut loose. It may be a good thing, or not. Hard to say. B...

athena12 · athena12

I have severe nearsightedness. Several years before my father died, he offered me $6000 to have the operation to get my eyes fixed. I was surprised by the offer, but declined it right away. Anyway, I was sort of touched by my fath...

purplebutterfly · purplebutterfly

I'm proably asking a crazy question. Why is that my dry A has all these wild things that I may be doing and im not doing it. I dont like being accused of things i havent done. ie--- said saw me sneak "my money" to my daughter. (which didnt happen) saying i sent someone pics i didn't Its driv...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Talked to the A just now and he was happy and calm and I caught myself getting a little upset. I was so stressed out last night in large part because of his words and now today it's like nothing ever happened. He is better and I am still holding a grudge. ERRRRRRR!!!! I would like to tu...

kabbie · kabbie

My mom is here, visiting from out of town. She's making me my favorite dinner tonight. She and I will go tommorrow to visit my daughter at her rehab facility. Daughter is off restriction so we will see a matinee, have dinner, pretty good chance we'll end up at Walmart. I have really leaned on my m...

marmare · marmare

Well I went on my ride along yesterday. It seems as the job will fit me very nicely. I can only find one draw back and that is the time I would be done. I got home around 8:30. Of course my A and 15 yr old had an argument before I was home and the 15 yr old called my cell phone. On m...

sensitive1 · sensitive1

Hi everyone! As some of you know I am new to here! I am also new to this. First I would like to express how I got here. Well I am seeing a counselor bout self esteem issues. On my second session she advised me to check out Al anon groups here locally. Well I do have to admit I am very shy to that so I thought I woul...

laurab · laurab

I went to my first AlAnon meeting last night. It was very kind and loving and gracious and welcoming. But, I felt like my life is a nightmare of waiting for the next phone call police car jail blackout coke deal loss tears etc, while everyone there was so calm and optimistic. I of course realize tha...

kabbie · kabbie

Just wanted to take a minute and speak to the positive side of recovery. At 37 days sober, my daughter is saying please and thank you, asking about family members, telling me to drive carefully in bad weather, hugging and holding hands with her dad and I, taking NO for an answer, sharing her feelings....

debilyn · debilyn

the photo page? we have one don't we? thanks love,debilyn

Newme · Newme

Dear ALL, Hello. I am new to this site,new to Al-Anon and trying to find the new me...being the daughter of a drug addict and not too long married to an A without knowing it from day one makes me feel lost with mixed feelings and low self confident...I feel I am living my mother's life and it bother...

bev · bev

i want to thank the few people who sent prayers and kind words,to me after the death of my dear father in law..it has been a rough month few weeks..first off i went on my cruise oct 8,on oct 9 my daughter who is 7 and half months pregnant went into premature,and was in the hospital for 2 days she is now on semi b...

sensitive1 · sensitive1

Hi again. I wanted to share my story. My user name says it all... I am sensitive. VERY sensitive. As is my mother who is the alcholic in the family. She was bout 10 years older than I when she started to drink. (I am 32) and she was really upset bout work and then thought the booze would he...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Today has been the worst day! My A came over last weekend and I believe he drank my son's codeine cough syrup and then watered it down. It was the consistency of honey and now it's like water. I am tired of questioning myself. He has every possible story in the book and swears up and down he didn't do it and I s...

carolinagirl · carolinagirl

Ok so last night was a miserable night. Today is better. Last night I talked to my neice who is 20 and told her about the cough syrup dilemma. She just kept saying that she couldn't believe that he would steal medicine from a baby. I don't know why I found that amusing. I didn't even care that he took it I...

Phil · Phil

"I loved my husband. I thought I couldn't live without him," said Nancy L. "But I also hated him. I hated that he wasn't the husband or father I knew he could be." At first, Nancy didn't recognize that her husband was drinking heavily and using marijuana and cocaine. However, she realiz...

Juster · Juster

I have been reading all of the postings about how the A's always seem to have an excuse or a reason to drink. Most of them sound fairly absurd - and really are just excuses. My AW has never said why she feels like she has to drink, but I have a suspicion that I might know one of the main reasons. ...

Christy · Christy

I came across this analogy of Letting Go vs. Giving up and thought I'd share. In Thailand, they trap monkeys by tethering a coconut shell to a stake in the ground. They cut a hole in the shell just big enough for a monkey's hand and then put a piece of fruit in the shell. Then they hide and wait. A monkey w...

Lauren ashley · Lauren ashley

Yes,I was in a horrible car accident today at about 605pm.It was the scariest thing that has ever ever happened to me. I literally saw my life flash right before my eyes. Ok I was getting onto the fwy and there was a red light as I got on I saw a puddle of water from a nearby sprinkler I went over the water and...

Barbara · Barbara

Anyone planning on attending either the AlAnon convention in Nashua NH? or the AA w/AlAnon convention in Framingham MA this Nov? Havent heard too much about it. Havent heard about it in my f2f either

Lunamoth · Lunamoth

((((Everyone)))) I survived the camp out ...and so did my program. I sit here and shake my head in unbelief, it was wonderful, insane, joyful, sickening and pleasant -- talk about a rollercoaster. Ah well, I learned a lot and have been wondering what my HP was trying to show me. ...

Andrea12 · Andrea12

Hello Dear Friends, Well it is 3:30 in the morning and I just can't sleep....so much has happened these past few days.....I am finding things out that my husband did to me every day...and it is not a good thing.... To date, I have received 3 letters from magistrates, he stole my check book and so...

debilyn · debilyn

ok where are you two?

Elizabeth M · Elizabeth M

Well my Ah is away for one week and instead of spending his last night home with me he was out till 4 am at our local bar. Up and left without a word. Will have to work hard on my own program not to sit on the pity pot too long. Hard not to feel bad since he had been trying so hard to control his d...

Cilla · Cilla

A while back somebody posted questions that they had learned to ask themself. I found this an excellent source to use during times of confusion. So what is going on with me? I'm trapped between having the need to feel hurt but at the same time know that good can come from this situation. ...

Gailey · Gailey

Absolutely!!! 3 things in the past couple of weeks have been on my mind with regard to taking care of myself. 1) Losing weight I have been trying to decide about a program that I used to do online. It is based on a book called "Potatoes Not Prozac". It is for healing addiction with nutritio...

purplebutterfly · purplebutterfly

I am tired of my A accusing me of lying and haveing an internet affair. saying im doing things i havent dont. Im losing my mind. I deep down wanna leave but am scared and afraid. IM so ashamed of me. I do nothing and im no good. I do all the house chores etc says i give my daughter money when i d...

maresie2 · maresie2

On top of the A who collects chaos by the second, I also have to deal with a dysfunctional workplace. I work in a corporation and they tend to hire college age kids who don't have work experience. They then sort of train them by immersion. I work part time in 2 locations stepping in for the m...

lilms · lilms

Hi all, Have a question. I have never given birth to a child. Have raised one and I know I would go to the ends of the earth for her. I can't imagine how things would be for a child I had carried and birthed. So, here is my question. My A stepdaughter has been in trouble more tha...

laurab · laurab

I'm new. My A is my 29 year old son. Finally after 6 years of my enabling in every way I could, thousands of dollars, police, lawyers, smashed cars and no real consequences, he is up against it alone. I hope it is the bottom, but I'm not certain. His wife is gone. He lost his house. He has no money. He...

rtexas · rtexas

((((Everyone)))) Since our seperation a scant 5 days ago, there has been panic attacks about being alone, threats of suicide, tears and begging to just work out her sobriety together and finally she has already said she is getting to not want to come home and wants the number to our EAP so she can cont...

lmt123 · lmt123

Just wondered, any news about the cookbooks? Maybe I missed it on the board... Thanks, Kathi

marmare · marmare

Okay it was a wonderful interview!!! I WOWED him!!! I have a ride along tomorrow and an interview after that to see if this is what I want to do and if they want me!!!! Hugs Mary -- Edited by marmare at 21:14, 2006-10-25

greta · greta

My daughter was critically injured in a car accident. Her best friend was killed and my daughter and another friend were in bed, wheelchairs, cruthes, surgeries for over 2 1/2 years. Physically my daughter can now walk and is doing ok. Looking back i suspect that she became addic...

ally · ally

Hi Roomies I don't quite know how to start this, so I will just be Ally, and come right out with it. Someone came into the chat room the other night and said "the acoa meeting is just about to start, is anyone comming in. So the chat room was quiet, and I went in. I had been in a few times already before, I list...

Gailey · Gailey

I sent you a private message. you can retrieve that by looking at the top of the index page.

DeAnna · DeAnna

i was dealing pretty good with my hub an A. Was going back to school, figured if he works out his end, we' d have a good life. He increasely drank more each year of 18 years together. 2 kids. 2 dogs. Last 2 weeks I found out he cheated on me. He was so drunk & telling someone on th...

DoN4me · DoN4me

Woke up this morning in a great mood. Went to work I got an email from my A first thing this morning, so I was feeling a little vunerable. Then a little while later I got a call from mom asked me to go to lunch so I said sure that would be fun. My mom and I have a strange re...

sensitive1 · sensitive1

Greetings all! let me tell ya my story. my mother started to drink when I was 14/15 and became a full time drinker when I was 16. Before then she was a warm loving quiet person. But now she is cold and her life is all bout the booze. Well this has hurt me of course and it has allowed me to N...

Gailey · Gailey

Just left work to go to a podiatrist appointment and when I got there I found out the appointment was last Wednesday. She is not even in the office on Tuesday. Luckily, I could reschedule for tomorrow and the receptionist didn't say anything about charging me for a missed appointment. I really nee...

Jennifer · Jennifer

Hello (((everyone))) 3 days without a phone .... doesn't seem like much. Not being able to get to the board and not being able to contact people I needed to made it a long three days. i feed the squirrels corn on the cob, there is a walnut tree in the backyard ... you'd think they have better things to eat t...

Phil · Phil

Adults who grew up with alcoholic parents probably have plenty to be mad about. As children, they were virtually powerless to stop the forms of abuse and neglect they often suffered. They couldn't express their anger or outrage in a healthy manner. Instead, many either acted out their...

Phil · Phil

"If you want to make God laugh, just tell Him your plans." This old Jewish proverb is especially familiar to people in recovery from addiction, but everyone can glean some meaning from these time-tested words. They serve as a gentle reminder that most of what happens in our life and in th...

arty · arty

Just to let everyone of you know that i read all the posts looking for inspiration, and i find it in each and evey reply to every message here. The most valuable time in my day is spent reading here. I learn so much from all your experiences and i am very greatful for the existance of this site. With my wo...

annmarie · annmarie

Hi everyone, Can anyone tell me if there is a workbook I can buy that will help me with the steps? I have to go back to step one, and am having problems with "my life becoming unmanagable". I understand I probably am experience a block called denial, but as far as I can see at the moment, I have pretty muc...

Topic		Started By	Replies	Views	Last Post
	Playing the Victim??? (Preview) (((Good morning everyone))) From snowy Colorado. It is pretty. I just wanted to see if anyone had some ESH on the Alcoholic playing the victim, or if that is what this is.... I have been going out almost every night, to an Alanon or AA meeting, because I HAVE to for my sanity. I do...	hersh	8	626	Oct 28, 2006 by Karilynn
	DO YOU STEER CLEAR OF GETTING OTHERS TO FEEL SORRY FOR YOU? (Preview) For years,,,when the insanity of my husbands drinking was progressing, I wanted friends and family to feel sorry for me. Oh woe is me! Sitting on the pity pot waiting for something good to happen. Somebody do something,,somebody stop all of this, somebody help me,,,,,etc,,,etc. Even when I started...	gardengal	5	1131	Oct 28, 2006 by Karilynn
	does it always get worse? (Preview) I went away with my a this past weekend to a beach house. just the two of us. He knows when we do things like that there is no point in him drinking, coz if he does there is no point in us having a romantic weekend. And it was beautiful. He used to drink all the time, thinking it was his only enjoyment. These...	arty	6	513	Oct 28, 2006 by arty
	When will it be my party (Preview) Well it looks like my plans for the holidays are on hold. I am not working enough to take time off so I will probably be working at the hotel. That will give me some respite. I will go out on the evening of New Years Eve to not have to deal with the fireworks. The bangs and the bombs and what...	maresie2	2	493	Oct 28, 2006 by Andrea12
	Let 'em whirl! (Preview) An old Arab, whose tent was pitched next to a company of whirling dervishes was asked, "Don't they bother you?" "No!" was his answer. "What do you do about them?" "I let them whirl." Wouldn't that be easier? Instead of trying to control a whirlwind? Probably any one of us can get along with pe...	greta	4	5007	Oct 28, 2006 by twinkie
	I Want to Let Go, He Won't (Preview) In Jan. of 2004, my drunk AH and I were in our home, he became belligerant, and gesturing his arms around wildly, and hit me in the nose. What followed is greater than my greatest nightmare ever was. I already have PTSSD, so everything was magnified. I wtnt o his mother's who took m...	Becky1	11	429	Oct 28, 2006 by bubbles1990
	Happy Birthday JrtJosey!! (Preview) Hey (((((((((Josey)))))))))) Happy Birthday! Hope you have a wonderful wonderful day!! Luv ya!! Kis	kismetstrand	12	544	Oct 28, 2006 by bubbles1990
	a new beginning (lovette) (Preview) Today is another new day. For a really long time I was focused on new beginnings needing to be some grand large change or shift. I am in the middle of a divorce right now and my daughters and I moved into our new apt on Wednesday. That is a big change, a big shift. What occurs to me that through these past few mo...	sparkette	5	504	Oct 28, 2006 by bubbles1990
	lies! so much lying...why? (Preview) I don't understand all the lies - why? Not lies to cover up drinking - he is not actively drinking right now - but lies about so many other things - whether he is going to AA meetings, if he called - we started out the relationship with deceit - he told me so many things which were untrue - broke the trus...	twinkie	5	547	Oct 28, 2006 by twinkie
	MIP Board Technical Question (Preview) Is there a way already, or would it be possible, to include a feature on the board where any user can see only the posts that they have posted (authored or posted within)? Thanks.	Noni	1	381	Oct 28, 2006 by Jennifer
	Tiring and Weird Week (Preview) Just got home from walmart. Poor me! (I LOVE Walmart!) Hubby is in his usual place, across the street, helping decorate for a Halloween party tomorrow night. His friends. I'm going to my friends party while he goes to his. This is different for us, we usually go together w...	Becky1	1	330	Oct 28, 2006 by lin0606
	so hard to detach (Preview) I have to bite my tongue and need some detachment. My A just had a major relapse a few months ago - he went on a 12 day binge - his mother rescued him, took him to the hospital, cleaned up his apartment, etc etc. (enabler!) I moved out. As a result of his relapse his son's mother filed a cus...	twinkie	2	425	Oct 28, 2006 by nmike
	I haven't phoned in 24 hours (Preview) I haven't spoken to my son in over 24 hours. I don't know where he is, if he still has his job, or if he is sober today. I know the 3 Cs. I know that if I call him and all I hear is terrible stuff, I will be miserable all night. I know what I have to do for myself, meetings, detach etc. But all I want is to know that he is...	laurab	3	457	Oct 28, 2006 by nmike
	Friday Gratitude List.... (Preview) ((((Happy Friday))) Everyone... Thought I would share a gratitude list - a lady at a meeting the other night said that she recited one in her head from A-Z so she could sleep at night... what a great idea! I did it last night and it actually worked. A- Alanon and AA B - Birds, breathing C - Co...	hersh	6	378	Oct 27, 2006 by peewee
	feeling guilt from a mall trip (Preview) I went to the mall with my daughter today . My dry A got mad I spent money on as my A says " junk". I bought her a necklace a pencil holder that had 4 things in it. and 2 lip glossess. We had a nice time together. Im having trouble letting go of guilt i dont deserve. Then my dry A says when home then im g...	purplebutterfly	3	384	Oct 27, 2006 by peewee
	Raging about Alcohol (Preview) I posted earlier about how my husband burned his camo sweatshirt jacket that I had worn. I used to always try to be nice about things, and try to smooth things over with him, but ever since I went off my antidepressants, I have just cut loose. It may be a good thing, or not. Hard to say. B...	Becky1	5	457	Oct 27, 2006 by Becky1
	IRRATIONAL THINKING NOT SOLELY A CHARACTERISTIC OF ALCOHOLICS (Preview) I have severe nearsightedness. Several years before my father died, he offered me $6000 to have the operation to get my eyes fixed. I was surprised by the offer, but declined it right away. Anyway, I was sort of touched by my fath...	athena12	3	452	Oct 27, 2006 by Tiger2006
	dry A craziness (Preview) I'm proably asking a crazy question. Why is that my dry A has all these wild things that I may be doing and im not doing it. I dont like being accused of things i havent done. ie--- said saw me sneak "my money" to my daughter. (which didnt happen) saying i sent someone pics i didn't Its driv...	purplebutterfly	5	459	Oct 27, 2006 by purplebutterfly
	On from here with optimism (Preview) Talked to the A just now and he was happy and calm and I caught myself getting a little upset. I was so stressed out last night in large part because of his words and now today it's like nothing ever happened. He is better and I am still holding a grudge. ERRRRRRR!!!! I would like to tu...	carolinagirl	1	452	Oct 27, 2006 by Tiger2006
	My mom is visiting (Preview) My mom is here, visiting from out of town. She's making me my favorite dinner tonight. She and I will go tommorrow to visit my daughter at her rehab facility. Daughter is off restriction so we will see a matinee, have dinner, pretty good chance we'll end up at Walmart. I have really leaned on my m...	kabbie	2	304	Oct 27, 2006 by hersh
	New Job? (Preview) Well I went on my ride along yesterday. It seems as the job will fit me very nicely. I can only find one draw back and that is the time I would be done. I got home around 8:30. Of course my A and 15 yr old had an argument before I was home and the 15 yr old called my cell phone. On m...	marmare	4	310	Oct 27, 2006 by isabela40
	Feeling worthless! (Preview) Hi everyone! As some of you know I am new to here! I am also new to this. First I would like to express how I got here. Well I am seeing a counselor bout self esteem issues. On my second session she advised me to check out Al anon groups here locally. Well I do have to admit I am very shy to that so I thought I woul...	sensitive1	7	561	Oct 27, 2006 by isabela40
	I went to an AlAnon meeting (Preview) I went to my first AlAnon meeting last night. It was very kind and loving and gracious and welcoming. But, I felt like my life is a nightmare of waiting for the next phone call police car jail blackout coke deal loss tears etc, while everyone there was so calm and optimistic. I of course realize tha...	laurab	7	441	Oct 27, 2006 by Rita G
	Grateful (Preview) Just wanted to take a minute and speak to the positive side of recovery. At 37 days sober, my daughter is saying please and thank you, asking about family members, telling me to drive carefully in bad weather, hugging and holding hands with her dad and I, taking NO for an answer, sharing her feelings....	kabbie	3	329	Oct 27, 2006 by Rita G
	Where is (Preview) the photo page? we have one don't we? thanks love,debilyn	debilyn	2	409	Oct 27, 2006 by Lauren ashley
	I am confused... (Preview) Dear ALL, Hello. I am new to this site,new to Al-Anon and trying to find the new me...being the daughter of a drug addict and not too long married to an A without knowing it from day one makes me feel lost with mixed feelings and low self confident...I feel I am living my mother's life and it bother...	Newme	3	345	Oct 27, 2006 by Lauren ashley
	to everyone who responded to my post (Preview) i want to thank the few people who sent prayers and kind words,to me after the death of my dear father in law..it has been a rough month few weeks..first off i went on my cruise oct 8,on oct 9 my daughter who is 7 and half months pregnant went into premature,and was in the hospital for 2 days she is now on semi b...	bev	2	447	Oct 27, 2006 by Christy
	Taking advil PM to relax.... HELP! (Preview) Hi again. I wanted to share my story. My user name says it all... I am sensitive. VERY sensitive. As is my mother who is the alcholic in the family. She was bout 10 years older than I when she started to drink. (I am 32) and she was really upset bout work and then thought the booze would he...	sensitive1	7	1551	Oct 27, 2006 by sensitive1
	Miserable Day! (Preview) Today has been the worst day! My A came over last weekend and I believe he drank my son's codeine cough syrup and then watered it down. It was the consistency of honey and now it's like water. I am tired of questioning myself. He has every possible story in the book and swears up and down he didn't do it and I s...	carolinagirl	5	364	Oct 27, 2006 by hersh
	Perspective (Preview) Ok so last night was a miserable night. Today is better. Last night I talked to my neice who is 20 and told her about the cough syrup dilemma. She just kept saying that she couldn't believe that he would steal medicine from a baby. I don't know why I found that amusing. I didn't even care that he took it I...	carolinagirl	1	318	Oct 27, 2006 by rtexas
	Family members can untangle from a loved one's addiction (Preview) "I loved my husband. I thought I couldn't live without him," said Nancy L. "But I also hated him. I hated that he wasn't the husband or father I knew he could be." At first, Nancy didn't recognize that her husband was drinking heavily and using marijuana and cocaine. However, she realiz...	Phil	1	526	Oct 27, 2006 by JulieLynn
	Maybe Some Do Have a Reason (Preview) I have been reading all of the postings about how the A's always seem to have an excuse or a reason to drink. Most of them sound fairly absurd - and really are just excuses. My AW has never said why she feels like she has to drink, but I have a suspicion that I might know one of the main reasons. ...	Juster	6	554	Oct 27, 2006 by Juster
	Difference of Letting Go vs. Giving up (Preview) I came across this analogy of Letting Go vs. Giving up and thought I'd share. In Thailand, they trap monkeys by tethering a coconut shell to a stake in the ground. They cut a hole in the shell just big enough for a monkey's hand and then put a piece of fruit in the shell. Then they hide and wait. A monkey w...	Christy	2	466	Oct 27, 2006 by greta
	I almost died tonight (Preview) Yes,I was in a horrible car accident today at about 605pm.It was the scariest thing that has ever ever happened to me. I literally saw my life flash right before my eyes. Ok I was getting onto the fwy and there was a red light as I got on I saw a puddle of water from a nearby sprinkler I went over the water and...	Lauren ashley	18	659	Oct 27, 2006 by leo
	Nov AlAnon convention in NH, AA w/AlAnon in MA - anyone going? (Preview) Anyone planning on attending either the AlAnon convention in Nashua NH? or the AA w/AlAnon convention in Framingham MA this Nov? Havent heard too much about it. Havent heard about it in my f2f either	Barbara	2	413	Oct 27, 2006 by Barbara
	Boy Scouting and Booze (Preview) ((((Everyone)))) I survived the camp out ...and so did my program. I sit here and shake my head in unbelief, it was wonderful, insane, joyful, sickening and pleasant -- talk about a rollercoaster. Ah well, I learned a lot and have been wondering what my HP was trying to show me. ...	Lunamoth	8	536	Oct 26, 2006 by isabela40
	Filing Charges against my husband (Preview) Hello Dear Friends, Well it is 3:30 in the morning and I just can't sleep....so much has happened these past few days.....I am finding things out that my husband did to me every day...and it is not a good thing.... To date, I have received 3 letters from magistrates, he stole my check book and so...	Andrea12	14	619	Oct 26, 2006 by peewee
	Isabela??? Or.arty??? (Preview) ok where are you two?	debilyn	2	335	Oct 26, 2006 by isabela40
	farewell party (Preview) Well my Ah is away for one week and instead of spending his last night home with me he was out till 4 am at our local bar. Up and left without a word. Will have to work hard on my own program not to sit on the pity pot too long. Hard not to feel bad since he had been trying so hard to control his d...	Elizabeth M	2	349	Oct 26, 2006 by Christy
	What is going on with me? (Preview) A while back somebody posted questions that they had learned to ask themself. I found this an excellent source to use during times of confusion. So what is going on with me? I'm trapped between having the need to feel hurt but at the same time know that good can come from this situation. ...	Cilla	1	455	Oct 26, 2006 by debilyn
	HP is talking...am I listening? (Preview) Absolutely!!! 3 things in the past couple of weeks have been on my mind with regard to taking care of myself. 1) Losing weight I have been trying to decide about a program that I used to do online. It is based on a book called "Potatoes Not Prozac". It is for healing addiction with nutritio...	Gailey	1	345	Oct 26, 2006 by TLC2
	being accused (Preview) I am tired of my A accusing me of lying and haveing an internet affair. saying im doing things i havent dont. Im losing my mind. I deep down wanna leave but am scared and afraid. IM so ashamed of me. I do nothing and im no good. I do all the house chores etc says i give my daughter money when i d...	purplebutterfly	6	363	Oct 26, 2006 by purplebutterfly
	Boundaries Boundaries Boundaries (Preview) On top of the A who collects chaos by the second, I also have to deal with a dysfunctional workplace. I work in a corporation and they tend to hire college age kids who don't have work experience. They then sort of train them by immersion. I work part time in 2 locations stepping in for the m...	maresie2	3	337	Oct 26, 2006 by TLC2
	What would you do? (Preview) Hi all, Have a question. I have never given birth to a child. Have raised one and I know I would go to the ends of the earth for her. I can't imagine how things would be for a child I had carried and birthed. So, here is my question. My A stepdaughter has been in trouble more tha...	lilms	8	417	Oct 26, 2006 by shelbelly
	I'm so scared. I need courage. (Preview) I'm new. My A is my 29 year old son. Finally after 6 years of my enabling in every way I could, thousands of dollars, police, lawyers, smashed cars and no real consequences, he is up against it alone. I hope it is the bottom, but I'm not certain. His wife is gone. He lost his house. He has no money. He...	laurab	8	668	Oct 26, 2006 by laurab
	Well... probably no better time to work on my 4th (Preview) ((((Everyone)))) Since our seperation a scant 5 days ago, there has been panic attacks about being alone, threats of suicide, tears and begging to just work out her sobriety together and finally she has already said she is getting to not want to come home and wants the number to our EAP so she can cont...	rtexas	7	479	Oct 26, 2006 by Juster
	MIP cookbooks... (Preview) Just wondered, any news about the cookbooks? Maybe I missed it on the board... Thanks, Kathi	lmt123	1	339	Oct 26, 2006 by Maria123
	Interview (Preview) Okay it was a wonderful interview!!! I WOWED him!!! I have a ride along tomorrow and an interview after that to see if this is what I want to do and if they want me!!!! Hugs Mary -- Edited by marmare at 21:14, 2006-10-25	marmare	9	430	Oct 26, 2006 by Karilynn
	I need to share this.. (Preview) My daughter was critically injured in a car accident. Her best friend was killed and my daughter and another friend were in bed, wheelchairs, cruthes, surgeries for over 2 1/2 years. Physically my daughter can now walk and is doing ok. Looking back i suspect that she became addic...	greta	7	531	Oct 26, 2006 by Karilynn
	LIVING A LIE (Preview) Hi Roomies I don't quite know how to start this, so I will just be Ally, and come right out with it. Someone came into the chat room the other night and said "the acoa meeting is just about to start, is anyone comming in. So the chat room was quiet, and I went in. I had been in a few times already before, I list...	ally	10	657	Oct 26, 2006 by ally
	laurab----private message (Preview) I sent you a private message. you can retrieve that by looking at the top of the index page.	Gailey	0	333	Oct 26, 2006 by Gailey
	barely there (Preview) i was dealing pretty good with my hub an A. Was going back to school, figured if he works out his end, we' d have a good life. He increasely drank more each year of 18 years together. 2 kids. 2 dogs. Last 2 weeks I found out he cheated on me. He was so drunk & telling someone on th...	DeAnna	5	367	Oct 26, 2006 by TLC2
	In a funky mood today (Preview) Woke up this morning in a great mood. Went to work I got an email from my A first thing this morning, so I was feeling a little vunerable. Then a little while later I got a call from mom asked me to go to lunch so I said sure that would be fun. My mom and I have a strange re...	DoN4me	5	375	Oct 26, 2006 by DoN4me
	Lack of Trust (Preview) Greetings all! let me tell ya my story. my mother started to drink when I was 14/15 and became a full time drinker when I was 16. Before then she was a warm loving quiet person. But now she is cold and her life is all bout the booze. Well this has hurt me of course and it has allowed me to N...	sensitive1	3	362	Oct 26, 2006 by sensitive1
	My life is unmanageable (Preview) Just left work to go to a podiatrist appointment and when I got there I found out the appointment was last Wednesday. She is not even in the office on Tuesday. Luckily, I could reschedule for tomorrow and the receptionist didn't say anything about charging me for a missed appointment. I really nee...	Gailey	4	542	Oct 26, 2006 by laurab
	I think I accomplished something (Preview) Hello (((everyone))) 3 days without a phone .... doesn't seem like much. Not being able to get to the board and not being able to contact people I needed to made it a long three days. i feed the squirrels corn on the cob, there is a walnut tree in the backyard ... you'd think they have better things to eat t...	Jennifer	2	433	Oct 26, 2006 by TLC2
	Moving from anger to forgiveness is a healing experience (Preview) Adults who grew up with alcoholic parents probably have plenty to be mad about. As children, they were virtually powerless to stop the forms of abuse and neglect they often suffered. They couldn't express their anger or outrage in a healthy manner. Instead, many either acted out their...	Phil	4	1087	Oct 26, 2006 by Phil
	Letting go of our need for control frees us (Preview) "If you want to make God laugh, just tell Him your plans." This old Jewish proverb is especially familiar to people in recovery from addiction, but everyone can glean some meaning from these time-tested words. They serve as a gentle reminder that most of what happens in our life and in th...	Phil	2	604	Oct 26, 2006 by Barbara
	You guys are ALL amazing (Preview) Just to let everyone of you know that i read all the posts looking for inspiration, and i find it in each and evey reply to every message here. The most valuable time in my day is spent reading here. I learn so much from all your experiences and i am very greatful for the existance of this site. With my wo...	arty	1	344	Oct 26, 2006 by annmarie
	workbook (Preview) Hi everyone, Can anyone tell me if there is a workbook I can buy that will help me with the steps? I have to go back to step one, and am having problems with "my life becoming unmanagable". I understand I probably am experience a block called denial, but as far as I can see at the moment, I have pretty muc...	annmarie	4	2420	Oct 26, 2006 by annmarie
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The material presented here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method to exchange information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal level.